Why did he do it? Why ruin Slytherin's house cup win during

>>82284549
>implying slytherin didn't cuck themselves over by not seeking out exactly where dumbledore told them not to go?
>motherfucker drops hints all through opening speech
>"don't go in the forest or third floor n shit"
>gryffindor's actually understood nuance of dumbledore's hint
>realised it was their chance to snake the cup for the first time in years cause no way do those slytherin dipshits work this out

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Yes yes well done, Slytherin, well done Slytherin, HOWEVER - there are some last minute issues we need to take into account.well, actually there's only one issue, and that's that Slytherin house is a part of one of the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

>>82285166
Has anyone actually done a comprehensive search for "stretched his legs"? good intro btw

>>82284549
MC trio did deserve the points.

>>82286232
>>82285166
Its from this 2003 article

http://archive.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2003/09/24/dumbing_down_american_readers/

Stretched is also only said 7 times in the book and none of the times ahs to do with legs.

>>82284549
>UHH 5000 POINTS TO THAT GINGER KID OVER THERE FOR PLAYING CHESS
>WELL LOOK AT THAT GRYFFINDOR WINS

>>82284549
He's gay for Harry.

>>82284549
affirmative action was real even in the wizard world

https://youtu.be/351Aa5q_S98

Actually a great song.

https://youtu.be/2Bb0k9HgQxc

Give him a break. A group of Gryffindors single-handedly stopped a genocidal dictator from returning.

Because the first two books weren't pretending to be anything other than British childrens' fare like the works of Roald Dahl.

It only looks absurd in retrospect after the later entries tried to make the series into something more serious.

>>82290505
>A group of Gryffindors single-handedly stopped a genocidal dictator from returning.

He wouldn't have been able to get the stone.

The whole elaborate series of tests thing was intended as bait to capture Quirrel because everyone suspected he was hiding Voldemort under his suspicious new hat and wanted to try to save his life. Harry fucked it all up and got him killed.