>finish paying for my popcorn >trip over and fall spilling

I'm glad I'm not you.

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>not sneaking in your own soda and popcorn

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8Dbr1eqTv0

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>doesn't keep a spare popcorn and soda

>>82277616
just take a nice shower at the cinema to calm you down

don't forget to feed your falcon

>>82277707
She is literally /ourgirl/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qy_lT6p_UE8

Serves you right for not storing your anvil first. You are bound to trip over it carrying snacks.

>>82277616

Just take it back to the snack bar and get it refilled. Odds are the bored teenagers working there don't give a shit.

>>82277809
This.
Employees won't care and any good manager would be happy to fill for you again.
Mistakes happen.

>>82277707
How does someone fuck up like this.

I don't understand.

>>82277852
By doing it on purpose, see >>82277781

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>buy my mandatory crab legs
>get stopped for mandatory penis inspection
>crab leg comes to life and snips my penis off
>mandatory no-singles policy falcon jumps off my falcon glove and grabs my penis and flies away
>trip over and fall spilling my mandatory bucket of crab legs while chasing it into the mandatory theater showers
>all the naked soapy guys laugh at my small penis as I fight the mandatory falcon
>pull out mandatory theater uzi and shoot mandatory falcon dead
>police show up and escort me out for terrorizm
>never get to watch GOTG2
>mfw jail cellmate sews penis back on upside down

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>>82277616
>12 years ago
>teen
>work in the local theater
>shift is over
>date with my crush at the same theater where I work
>took me months to ask her out
>pretend not to work there
>don't tell boss because he'd fuck with me
>crush wants popcorn
>tell her to go see our seats and I'll take care of it
>get rid of her because boss is working as cashier
>ask him for 2 big popcorns and sodas
>tell him I'll watch the movie with a friend
>crush says something right behind me
>no idea why she's there, scared the shit out of me
>popcorn flew all over
>boss screams to uniform up and clean that mess or he won't pay me
>crush is looking weirdly at me
>drop sodas and bolt out

almost killed myself that night, she never spoke to me again

>>82277916
None of this was remotely funny in the slightest

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>go to kinoplex
>closed again due to popcorn mine strike

every fucking time. can we not just automate this shit?

Movie theaters should have tables so one can have dinner while watching a movie.

>>82278051
>he doesn't support American popcorn miners
You have to go back dumb frogposter.

>>82278167
Fuck them, they don't even work anyway and I can't see my fucking kinos.

>>82277957
You did the right thing

>>82277781
is this supposed to be funny?

>>82278205
My grandfather got kernel lung working in those mines you insensitive fuck.

>>82278118
Some movie theaters do this

>>82277616
>see you
>shout "OUCH! THAT'S GOTTA HURT!"

>>82278464
Then automate the shit then if you're so sensitive you crybaby

>>82277957
>boss screams to uniform up and clean that mess or he won't pay me

what the everloving fuck?

>>82277781
This is attention whoring on a new level.

I don’t think I’m going out on a limb by saying that movie theaters can be stressful. Crowded rooms rarely bring out the best in people, and that’s why common courtesy is so important. If you’ve ever been in a theater where a parent blatantly disregards that courtesy and lets her little black kid cry his lungs out in the seat next to you, then you’ve probably been pretty aggravated, much as I was on a recent trip to Atlanta seeing Logan. And yet somehow—don’t ask me how—for some reason I’ve come out of this whole episode as the bad guy. Yes, me. You know, as if that makes any sense at all.

Why? Oh, because apparently slapping a little nigger baby and telling him to shut up makes you some kind of monster in this day and age. Go figure.


Seriously, though, explain to me how I come out of this one looking like “the villain.” What was I doing wrong? Sitting in my seat, drinking my alcohol, and minding my own business? I acted like a normal human being, and now I’m being vilified. Look, I have all the sympathy in the world for parents watching a movie with young children. I know it’s no picnic. But if you can’t get your child to behave, then I’m sorry, steps need to be taken. I mean, am I missing something here?

And man, you wouldn’t believe the looks I got after I hit that nigger kid. Seriously, they were looking at me like I just totally lost my shit. Like I’d been the one crying, ruining the movie for everyone! No joke, these people turned on me so quick. On me! The good guy in this situation! It was one of the most bizarre things I’ve ever seen in my life: A theater full of people looked at a screaming colored kid, and then looked at me—the guy who hit the kid, mind you—and they all decide to side with the colored kid. I couldn’t believe my fucking eyes.

>>82277987
(((Frog picture))) was lol

>>82278457
Yes, a lot of people found it to be. I know I did.

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>paying for overpriced cheap-ass food full of oil and salt

Either have a decent meal before/after the movies or sneak in good stuff than paying triple for shitty food

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>>82277781

>7:54

>>82278910
>tripping and making a big mess on purpose is funny

What's having a shit sense of humor like?

>>82277616
>supporting the eternal jew by buying any extremely overpriced shit apart from the ticket

kill yourself you gullible pawn

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>>82279035
>well done

>>82279035
>well done steak with ketchup
>racist milk

hello drumpf

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>>82277700

>>82279262
I could ask you the same question. Sense of humor is purely subjective.

>>82279375
Lmfao, Brumpf actually fucking eats well done steak. What an utter pleb

>>82277616
>sit down
>drink my popcorn and eat my soda
JDIMSA

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>drop crab leg on floor
>find rustic milk dud

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>>82280607

>>82277957
>boss screams to uniform up and clean that mess or he won't pay me
What a fucking asshole

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>trip while finding my seat
>my crab leg pierces through the heart of a fellow movie-goer

>>82278051
The miners tried this at my flickflock and were massacred by the redshirts. We call it the St. Valentines Day Clapassacre

>>82281827
>he doesn't have kino insurance for this sort of incident

I dont get this

>>82277616
>buy large drink
>put it in drink coaster in the seat
>dont realize some of my coat is under my drink
>pull the coat out under my drink
>drink falls under the seat of the person in front of me
>realize it landed in some chicks purse
>laugh and leave the theatre to refill
>come back into theatre and sit somewhere else, laughing

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>trying to watch some kino in my local kinoplex
>trip and fall down into the manlet pit

WHY IS IT STILL HERE

>>82282697

thats a /fit/ meme u dumb frog poster keep it there

Does anyone have the reaction image of the Asian girl who fell over and she has a bunch of food on the ground? She had an annoyed, why does this always happen to me, look on her face

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>teenagers behind you kicking your seat ever so slightly

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>>82283175
Stop trying to meme

>go to local cinemaplex
>decide to see Logan
>pay $30 for the ticket
>decide I'm hungry and queue up for some snacks
>'That'll be $35 please'
>What the fuck?
>"Are you sure? That seems a bit steep."
>"Yes, I am sure. $35 please."
>"Are you sure you didn't click the extra large popcorn button by mistake, I ordered medium"
>"Sir, all prices are set by Corporate Office"
>I'm mad by now, fuck this Jewery
>"Fuck that, I'm not paying that"
>Cashier looks over to the guard from corner of eye
>"Ayo, what's up homie? Whats takin' so lawng"
>Turn round in a huff to give this subhuman scum nignog a piece of my mind
>6'8 beefcake
>I'm barely up to his ripping pecs
>"Um..."
>"What's up dawg? You movin or what?"
>Quickly bring a $50 out of my pocket and slam it on the table and grab my food
>"K-keep the change"
>I scurry away into theatre
>As I walk pass the shredded nigger I notice this qt3.14 white grill on his waist, practically fucking him right there
>She smirks at me as I go past
>I get into the theatre to watch /tv/ recommended kino
>start thinking of all the things I should have said to the cashier AND the subhuman
>can't enjoy the movie at all

Fucking Cinemaplex.

>>82277781
this is her finest work

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5i_UiEpy9_c

>>82283688
CLEAN IT UP WAGIE!

>>82277707
>>82277781
>>82283688
She clearly has some problems, I'm not laughing at this.