in this thread we will be discussing the revenant a fur trapper

really decent movie but that bear moved way too fast to be believable

>>81757268
He was raped by the bear in the original cut of the movie but it was edited out for release, too brutal and perverse etc.

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>>81757542
A momma bear rapes poor leo for what? to protect her cubs?

>>81757472

are you kidding? bears are like wicked fast dude. they could easily take a 400 pound gorilla. they're enormous. they'd swipe you in two with one swipe of their claws. they can run 35 miles an hour.

ok, the hero is pretty close to dying and now they had to leave him with some guys and the ratty dude that no one feels good about is being trusted. he went on some dream quest or some shit about the wind and tree's and now everyones fucking around. also it found that the trappers got sold out or something.

>Leo survives by deus ex machina: The Movie
>wins an oscar

>>81757602
>they can run 35 miles an hour.
i heard 75 miles per hour, in any direction including backwards or sideways

OH FUCK the ratty dude was like 'i can take the suffering away, i can end it, i can do that for you, just blink and i'll smother you. and the hero eventually blinked, and he started smothering him, and the heros tree nigger son caught him and hit him and then the ratty dude fucking stabbed his treenigger son in front of him and the hero is freaking the fuck out man.

>>81757674

yeah man bears can fucking strafe faster than my 2000 metro can go on the highway. imaging getting hit head on by a bear like that.

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MUH PELTS MOFUGGA

>>81757718
>the ratty dude
you mean The Big Guy himself?

>>81757728

THIS SON OF A BITCH

>>81757743

i mean

THIS SON OF A BITCH.

>>81757728

OH FUCK. RATTY DUDE IS TRYING TO BURY HIM ALIVE. OH FUCK THEY'RE LEAVING HIM.

the hero must be so angry right now. i would be. first my pelt camp gets fucked up by tree niggers. then a bear fucks my ass up. and then this faggot kills my son in front of me. and then they run off and leave me.

what the fuck man.

>>81757662
He won as Oscar because he fought an actual bear on film, yes true it was a trained movie bear, but its still extremely brave to do, something could have easily gone wrong

>>81757662
>implying the story or plot has anything to do with his acting performance

/tv/ is the worst board

Hardy's acting really made Leo look bad in comparison

also this is one of those movies that could have cut at least a half hour of nothingness (start with the dream sequences)

they left the hero behind now and now the guy with the ratty dude has a fucking gun on him AND FUCKING TAKES THE GUN AWAY AND PUTS IT BACK ON HIS HEAD.

but the hero's kinda getting around a bit now, using his dead son as a pillow (???wtf???) and crawling out of his grave and all.

>>81757926
'
fuck did he actually kill it too? that's badass as shit.

>>81758027

fuck, i wish movies were five hours long and entire hours went by in which nothing happened except they waited around.

dudes eating the spinal tap from the bear now.

>>81757600
Yes. Rape is okay in self-defense.

oh fuck hero man is about to ignite gunpower on his fucking exposed esophagus to fuck cauterize a fucking hole because he tried fucking drinking and the fucking water leaked out the fucking hole in his throat. holy shit that looked like it hurt.

now hero man is swimming downriver because he got seen by a buncha treeniggers. it looks bad. there's rapids and mini waterfalls and shit.

i don't know how the fuck any of these people survive getting their feet wet in this environment let alone taking swims in bear pelts.

hero man's been doing some shit. getting better.