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I can't afford Netflix so can someone post the best

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I can't afford Netflix so can someone post the best jokes from this?
>>
>>80452691
Her pussy stinks bad the comedy special
>>
But there are none.
>>
>>80452691
>>80452721
>>altright "humor"

she made more money for that special than you will in 25 years.

looooool. u so jelly shes paid & fame while u pump gas in jersey.
>>
>>80452691

the one she stole from dave attell
>>
>>80452802
le back to le reddit le le
>>
>>80452802
alt-right BTFO

How will the alt-right ever recover?
>>
>>80452691
>he has this saved on his phone
>>
>>80452691
>Some times my boyfriend cums inside me.

>laughter.
>>
If kikes are going to prohibit goys from comedy specials, could they at least find a funny kike?
>>
SO MY DAD'S A MAN
*audience groans*
BUT ONE DAY HE CREAMPIED MY MOM
*heavy laughter*
AND OUT POPPED A HEALTHY BABY GIRL
*standing ovation*
FROM A GAPING VAGINA
*audience hitches with laughter*
AND THERE I WAS WITH MY LITTLE BABY PUSSY, THAT'S BABY PUSSY FOLKS
*people starting coughing they've been laughing so hard, they slap themselves vigorously*
...........PUSSYS HAVE PERIOD BLOOD AND CUM LOADS *BRAAAAAAAAPS*
*audience explodes with laughter*
ANAL
*loss of life in the ensuing orgiastic celebration*
>>
>>80453052
Her and Louis ck should get married
>>
>>80453052
HAHA TWITTER HATERS, AM I RIGHT, GUYS?
>>
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Rather than exaggerate, here's the actual highlights

>I don't know if you guys know this, but this past year I've gotten very rich, famous and humble.

>This does not leave this theater. On my pussy's best day, it smells like a small barnyard animal.

>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."

>I wish we were raised more like men. Here's an example. Have you ever had a guy cum in your mouth and go, "Does it taste okay? I haven't been drinking a lot of water, and I'm a little worried."

>Every comic has some special where they wear leather, and they regret it later. It's my fucking moment. Leather special! Woop woop, already regret it!
>>
>>80454192
>Have you ever had a guy cum in your mouth
She hasn't.
>>
>>80452691
>My vagina.
>>
>>80454192
Are you serious? Because if so, she's actually worse than the shitposts about her. Only the first one could actually be considered to be a joke.
>>
>>80454370
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ux-x1GnUuqY
>>
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>>80454192
>>Every comic has some special where they wear leather, and they regret it later. It's my fucking moment. Leather special! Woop woop, already regret it!
Eddie Murphy doesn't regret a damn thing.
>>
>>80454192
>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."
The first and last time Schumer will make me laugh
>>
>>80454192
Well if I ever need to induce vomitting, I know I can put on this special
>>
>i secreted bodily fluids from my orifices
*audience start ripping its skin out of ecstasy*
>>
>>80454370
When you actually watch it you realize not only is her material weak, but her delivery is god awful too. A lot of the best comedians can elevate shitty material with their charisma but this bitch has none.
>>
>>80452691
"DUDE VAGINA LMAO"
>>
>>80452802
I sincerely doubt she made that much money
>>
>>80453052
>*BRAAAAAAAAPS*
ffs why did I laugh at that
>>
>>80454402
Well he probably regrets some things
>>
>vagina

*auditorium explodes into rapturous laughter*

>>80454572
Norbert perhaps
>>
>>80452691
You can already see her whole body
>That's the joke
>>
>>80452691

I had a look, and she literally starts her show by saying

>this is so important for ME
>ME ME ME ME for the next 5 minutes

I was gonna 1 star it anyway but goddamn my crusty cum sock gets more laughs than her
>>
LOL she has no talent whatsoever. The only reason she gets movie roles and on television because she a jewish senators daughter. Which in the USA is nobility.
>>
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>>80454667
*niece

The worst part is even her uncle is funnier than her. Did you see the speech where he started crying onstage because Muslims weren't going to be allowed to come into the country anymore?
>>
>>80454192
>>I don't know if you guys know this, but this past year I've gotten very rich, famous and humble.

that's literally the start of Ricky Gervais stand up
Only check out how much better Ricky does it

https://youtu.be/CkVmQPNA114?t=88
>>
>>80454192
brave joke is funny, but yikes
>>
>>80454747
Ricky has at least some talent though, so it's not a fair comparison.
>>
>>80454747
kek, still stealing jokes. What a dumb cunt
>>
>>80454710
one of the Muslims that he personally aided in coming into the US is now facing child sexual abuse charges

Chuck Schumer is a fucking dumb cunt and that's the nicest thing you can say about his niece

https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/indian-athlete-who-overcame-the-travel-ban-arrested-for-sexual-abuse-in-new-york/2017/03/03/47799758-d1ad-4cd5-8673-8459b7c2768e_story.html?utm_term=.5ecfd4cb6d8d
>>
HEY YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE NICE
*audience perks up and holds their breath*
IF FUCKING MEN
*audience starts giggling in anticipation*
DIDN'T HAVE DICKS
*audience starts bobbing and fidgeting in their seats waiting for the punchline*
BUT IF THEY HAD STINKY VAGINAS LIKE US
*audience erupts into laughter so hard they all start vomiting blood onto the stage*
AM I RIGHT LADIES?
*several loud woop woops can be heard from the black female section of the theatre*
>>
>>80452691
>Good Jokes
>Amy Shemale
Pick one
>>
>>80452691
>>
>>80454981
Amy Schumer looks like THAT?
>>
/tv/ is fucking obsessed with this fat cunt

wew
>>
>>80454994
She wishes
>>
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>>
>>80455005
wow no way people talk about newly released media what a surprise
>>
Hahaha /tv/ will never surprise me with how retarded they are. Literally nobody is watching this show except you people so you can make your funny little memes. This show would be cancelled if it wasn't for the "alt right" and how much they love their Lil memes. You're so retarded haha.
>>
>>80455161
yeah because this is the ONLY time /tv/ makes threads about this dumb cunt

you pathetic losers just want to fuck in her blubbery ass
>>
>>80454944
pretty accurate summary of female comedy.
>>
>>80452802
All of that without Jewish connections....oh wait nvm
>>
>>80452802
That's classist.
>>
>>80455213
If anyone didn't already know that reddit is shit, this comment proves it.
>>
>>80455256
Yea but people are only discussing her today because of her special, ASIDF pls go
>>
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>>80454192
>>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."
>>
Menstruration Jokes
Guys are dumb jokes

There I just saved you time.
>>
>>80454524
tickets were 300 dollars
>>
>>80455302
she's a dumb fat cunt and so are you, you little alt-right cucklet
fucking pathetic loser jerking and tugging your little dick to something as nasty as her
get a fucking life lol
>>
>>80452691

VA-GI-NA
VA-GI-NA
CLICKITY CLACKITY CLICKITY CLACKITY CLICKITY CLACKITY
*machine gun sounds*
>>
>>80455362
Get help.
>>
>>80454192
>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."
That one's bretty good desu
>>
>>80452802
this has to be a /pol/fag pretending to be a sjw
>>
>>80454981
*HNGGGG*
>>
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>>80454192
>>
>>80452802
We were asking about the quality of the content of her performance, not how much she made. Fuck off.
>>
>>80454192
Why do we hate her again?
>>
>>80455698
Because she is a fucking pig and a joke thief. Also related to Chuck Schumer.
>>
>>80454192
Not going to quote the fags who quoted you, but this is to let them know that the jokes you mentioned were all in the trailer.


The tweet joke was pretty funny.
>>
>>80453052
>ANAL
>>
>>80452802
HOLY SHIT


NOW THAT THE DUST HAS SETTLED HOW THE FUCK WILL THE ALT-RIGHT EVER RECOVER??
>>
>>80452802
>she made more money for that special than you will in 25 years
>Equates making lots of money to a worthwhile existence.
Hahahaha, keep slaving you fucking drone.
>>
>>80452691
Here ya go, Anon:
That's everything, enjoy.
>>
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>>80454192
The 3rd one is pretty funny, I give her that.
>>
The ones that she stole, again...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsAiEnP6naA
>>
>>80454192
i don´t think she goes out of her way to steal jokes, she just recreates overdone concepts and butchers similar themes.
>>
>>80456595
Dave Chapelle, a national treasure.

Amy Jewmer, a fucking national embarrassment. Why couldn't she just move to leafland?
>>
"MY VAGINNNNNAAAAA!"

Just starts diddling herself on stage. Audience explodes into laughter.
>>
>>80452691

>"As I get older the kind of sex I like changes. Like I used to really love having sex with Hispanic guys but now I just prefer consensual"

Why do we hate her again?
>>
>>80452802
Sadly you're right. I only have a bit over $1m at 27.
>>
>>80457750
Because she's a cunt. Had that same exact joke come out of a male comedian's mouth she'd probably be one of the first to be "outraged" by it.
>>
>>80456595
She's stolen way way more than that.
>>
>>80453052

This cant be her routine since its actually funny
>>
>>80457750
>I used to really love having sex with Hispanic guys
So it was consensual
Fucking hack.
>>
>>80455698
she sucks at everything I would like a celebrity for
>>
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>can't afford Netflix

/tv/ was a mistake.
>>
You know them guys who aren't getting sex (no offence) tv, so they over compensate by being really lewd and dirty all the time.

She's like that, it's always the ones who aren't having sex that talk about it in a vulgar way all the time
>>
>>80454192
>The """"""joke""""" is Literally saying her pussy is disgusting.

The stereotypes are true
>>
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>women can't be fun-
>>
>>80452802
alt-right on suicide watch
>>
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>>80454192
that cum one got a chuckle out of me

Don't know what about her gets you guys so riled up. I'll probably watch the whole thing at some point.
>>
>>80459680
Literally me
>>
>>80459957
Racism done right I say, but people talk her seriously when you're not supposed to. Just laugh at the nonsense.
>>
>>80453052

That's pretty much every female "comedian", though.

>So... vaginas

*every single atom in the audience's DNA immediately collapses in on itself causing a self-sustaining thermonuclear reaction that instantly vaporizes the Eastern seaboard*
>>
>>80460066
>>80459957
The only thing I remember from The Sarah Silverman Program was when she got in a car accident and while unconscious she went to heaven and encountered a Morgan Freeman-ish old man.

She immediately asked him "Are you God... 's black friend?"
>>
>>80452832
What joke was it? I dont want to watch the special.
>>
>>80459997
I don't get it
>>
>>80457802
You only have 1 dollar and 27 cents? What are you five?
>>
>>80452802
I like to think a neurologist will make more than that.
>>
>>80460696
I specially stated $1m. Which is $1,000,000.
>>
>>80459957

This is like a Bernard Manning joke.
>>
>>80460838
lol that aint shit at 27 kid
>>
>>80452848
This is just as funny now as the other 500,000 times you've posted it.
>>
>>80452691

Her tv show is actually really funny. I couldn't finish that one movie she was in though. It was a romantic comedy that got really boring about halfway through.
>>
>>80459957

kek
>>
>>80455698
She's a fat ugly jewess who wants to kill all white men.
>>
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>>80452708
>tfw can't get the stench of her stinky pussy out of my nose after seeing her pic posted all over /tv/
>>
>>80461108
I know. That's what I originally said. Keep up mate.
>>
>>80461108
>kid
>27

How much do you have where you can laugh off $1,000,000?
>>
>>80462615
you worry about your tiny bank account ill worry about my reading comprehension
>>
>>80462670
i have more than enough
>>
MUH VAGINA
>>
>>80452802

Pumping gas is a noble profession
>>
>>80452802
the "more money meme" I would honestly rather make a 10th of what she does and do something actually intellectually fulfilling than be a low tier shit comedian.Comedy can intelligent (I.E. Carlin or Louis C.k) but she brings it down to babby level bagina XD jokes
>>
>>80454192
>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."

Not bad, Schumer.
>>
>>80452802
Money=/=Funny, Amy. Nice try.
>>
>>80462680
You should be worrying about it more, since you missed the whole point. Pathetic.
>>
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>alt-right

Why are they the new boogieman?
>>
>>80462737
Prove it. Oh wait, you can't. Pathetic NEET lying on the internet. LMAO. Go on, load up Paypal and do an Inspect Element edit to make it look like you have billions :D
>>
>>80463597
not as pathetic as only having 1 mill at 27
>>80463629
why are you so upset
>>
>>80460459
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsAiEnP6naA
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsJQbFdGYCk
>>
>>80463744
TOO REAL LOL
>>
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>she fell for the fat meme
>>
>>80454192
The brave one is good but the rest is just too cringy
>>
>>80454192
Jokes 1 and 3 are good. The rest...just no plz. Not even womyn would enjoy that.
>>
>>80452802
>she made money
>that makes it good
>im a retard
>>
>>80454524
Sadly her net income from her career is over $50 million now.
>>
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this is her, right? I never actually cared to learn who it is in this picture
>>
>>80452708
I found this joke actually disturbing.. I haven't been around thousands of pussies, but damn I've never been around one that smells like a baby goat or any kind of farm animal, made it sound like it was ok to walk around with a vaginal infection.
>>
>>80452802
Gas pumpers contribute more to the world than her
>>
>>80459957
Silverman isn't funny... just extremely repulsive.
>>
>>80465812
Holy shit did she really say that??
>>
>>80454597
>Norbit

Oh please. Norbit was bad, but he probably doesn't care about that with all that money he made with it. Pluto Nash and Meet Dave, now THAT'S fucking regret.
>>
>>80466016
She could get away with saying that just by using a snarky tone. It's her sarcastic response to Jews being persecuted.
>>
>>80465812
she was funny to me when she didn't dress so stupid
>>
>>80454747
Honestly, Gervais was probably not the first one to do that joke. It's classic bait and switch.
>>
>>80464876
Bro, there are pussies that smell WAY worse than farm animals. Some literally smell worse than rotting corpses.

t. mortician
>>
>>80452802
That may be true, but she's still unfunny.
>>
>My boyfriend cums in me
>Audience laughs
Is that really that funny?
>>
>>80452802
>t. a nigger

Life isn't all about money and smelly pussy, negro.
>>
>>80463598

The Left needed a new boogyman when they realized the KKK hasn't been relevant since the 60s and today is 80% FBI agents observing each other.
>>
>>80466896
all this comment made me think of is I was thinking of becomming a mortician

only because I'm anti-social and am positive I can deal with being around dead bodies I just need to know if the money is good

I know I'm going to end up in a warehouse driving a fucking forklift cuz my only ambition in life ever was to be a comedian and they aint fucking hapepnign
>>
>>80466978

Unrealistic situations are pretty comedic.
>>
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What does she mean by this?
>>
>>80456595
>stealing from two of the most well-known and respected comedy specials of the past twenty years

how fucking stupid can you be?
>>
>>80454437
This desu
>>
>>80452691
Is that an ogre?
>>
>>80454192
>>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."
That's pretty good.
>>
Posting a better comedian:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltbluBU0pQY
>>
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>>80452691
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6CIlV1ezYhE
>>
>>80463678
>the angry NEET is STILL going

Sadly (You)'s are not legal tender, my friend. So pathetic you can't even fake having money. L M A O.

>w-ww-w-w-w-why y-y-y-ou upset!!!
>if I s-s-s-say it... it's t-t-t-true

Guess that's why you're so rich (but refuse to prove it L M A O)

Enjoy being a poor NEET :^)
>>
>>80467546

Got a chuckle out of me. Too bad the rest of her material is God-awful.
>>
>>80467546
I don't get it.
>>
>>80467980
If she was hot then everyone would just call her hot or beautiful
She's a fat gremlin so the only positive thng people can say is brave.
>>
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>>80466348
>It's her sarcastic response to Jews being persecuted.

You misspelled, "prosecuted for killing Christ"... an all too common, but intentional, error.
>>
>>80452802
HAARETZ NEWS REPORTING RICHARD SPENCER IS ON SUICIDE WATCH
>>
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>>80467307
>/pol/ babies

Keep projecting, libtard.
>>
Is this a female comedian thread?

https://youtu.be/20K8B8jrtUA
>>
>>80452802
>pump gas in jersey.

is that a euphemism?
>>
>>80452802
probably not the best attack against the alt right when their faggot leader is a billionaire
>>
>>80468529
>Trump cares about his rural supporters
I love this meme
>>
>>80459997
Degenerate
>>
>>80465812

wtf i hate free speech now

ban the first amendment
>>
>>80469044
I like how free speech has quotes around it, like that example doesn't count or something.
>>
I laughed when she describes a guy coming on the top of her head, and she puts on a sad hurt porn star face and kind of dejectedly says "I'm the prettiest girl in Colorado."

There were a few other pretty funny lines. It's not great but it isn't absolutely terrible, either.
>>
Urzila Carlson is way funnier than Amy Schumer
>>
She has the same audience that got trump elected.
>>
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>>80454192
>I don't know if you guys know this, but this past year I've gotten very rich, famous and humble.
Not original, and not very good.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KzUKcXxbU4U

>This does not leave this theater. On my pussy's best day, it smells like a small barnyard animal.
"lol pusy smell bad"
Fuck off

>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."
Decent

>I wish we were raised more like men. Here's an example. Have you ever had a guy cum in your mouth and go, "Does it taste okay? I haven't been drinking a lot of water, and I'm a little worried."
I don't even know what the fuck this even means

>Every comic has some special where they wear leather, and they regret it later. It's my fucking moment. Leather special! Woop woop, already regret it!
This isn't even a joke

She has terrible delivery and her jokes are just chinese knock-offs of material everyone else has already used
>>
>>80452802
Fuck you
>>
>>80456595
>takes jokes from insanely famous comedians
>makes them unfunny and thinks the jokes are funny due to their crassness and not because of their timing and energy
>>
>>80454572
Legit lmao
>>
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>>80452802
Good for her.
Maybe she can use that money to buy some funny jokes from actual comedians.
>>
>>80471144
But her delivery would still be inadequate.
>>
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>>80454192

>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."

>Every comic has some special where they wear leather, and they regret it later. It's my fucking moment. Leather special! Woop woop, already regret it!

those were actually pretty good and topical desu famalam
>>
>>80454402
eddie murphy specials were and always will be shit. it's the apollo theater with fart jokes.
>>
>>80454192
>>I tweeted out a photo of myself wearing just underwear, and that's when I learned the word you don't want people to use when a nude photo of you goes viral. "Brave."
This one was okay.
Everything else was shit.
>>
>>80452802
YAAAASSSSSS QUEEN
>>
>>80472105
Delirious is Kino, you pleb.
>>
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>>80472245
>>
>paying for digital content
>increasing the wealth of those jewllywood pigs
>2015+2

you really enjoy being a cuck
>>
Say what you will about Sarah Silverman but she's 20x more fuckable than Amy, and that's not saying much.
>>
>>80472053
The leather one isn't funny
Name two comedians other than eddie murphy who ever did that without googling.
>>
>>80473903
sinbad

diceman
>>
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>>80473903
shuckyducky and hamburger
>>
>>80454437

It's funny in text format, but imagine a large mammal saying it with extremely poor timing and delivery.
>>
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>>80452691
>>80452802
>1
>FUCKING
>STAR
>>
>jews
>funny
>>
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>>80467307
>>
>>80474109
i tried to give it 0 starts but netflix won't let you
>>
>>80463598
They learned that straight up calling everyone a nazi doesn't work, so they picked a new word.
>>
how many guys you think she raped or abused?
>>
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>>80467307
(You)
>>
>>80454981
Mmmm
>>
>>80473903
Ralphie May.
>>
Here's (((Steven Crowder))) putting a meter on how long it takes her to say something slutty

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rx9A0ABUV-I&spfreload=10
>>
>>80468307
You realize that's fake news, right?
>>
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>>80454437
That was good. She had another one in some older shit that went like " I used to date Mexicans, but now I prefer consensual sex." Not bad.

She's a bit like Silverman; if they'd just keep their yaps shut about politics, they would at least be tolerable. Nobody wants to hear celebrities or athletes blather on about shit they clearly know nothing about, and I don't understand why it's racist or misogynistic to point it out.

I'd be just as annoyed if Pat Buchanan started doing stand-up or Jim Goad got named as starting cornerback for the Eagles just based off of whatever modicum of fame they accrued doing something they were actually good at.
>>
>>80452691
is she bitch?
>>
>>80454549

no joke, BRAAP posting mad me quit fapping. Gave me more confidence with qts too, no matter how hot they are I picture them BRAPING and I think of them as just holes for muh dick
>>
>>80452802
alt-right got told got told got told got told got told got told got told got told got told
>>
>>80456595
As if the world needed any other reasons to hate her.
>>
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>>80474679
>>
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>>80468307
>>80474158
>>80474469
Nice arguments. Thanks for the free (You)'s, by the way.
>>
>>80473903
Dice Clay
Jeffries
Izzard

Not that I disagree with you, just wanted to prove I could do it
>>
>>80467873
yo it's that boi Chad Daddy Daniels
>>
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>>80474810

No. It's not. But it sure is embarrassing... isn't it?

You morons should be ashamed of yourselves. Only problem is... you don't really have any.
>>
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>>80469253

Sorry, but until anyone can freely and openly criticize the holohoax without repercussions, freedom of speech does not really exist.
>>
>>80454437
Dude that joke is old as fuck

like 3 fucking years old, at least
>>
>>80472105
faht jokes

It's the 80s, remember.
>>
>>80452802
Jokes doubly on you: I'm Donald Trump
>>
>>80458088
That joke wouldnt make sense from a male comedian.
>>
>>80452691
Say what you want about Carlos Mencia, but at least he took the jokes he stole and delivered them like a fucking pro.

She's hacky with material that was solid before she stole it. She'll get a pass because...vagina.
>>
>>80460796
neurologists aren't very high paid doctors. But even still you're probably right.
>>
>>80459957
I never found Silverman to be even remotely funny until she started shilling for Hillary Clinton. Now almost everything she does is unintentionally hilarious.
>>
>>80460102
I don't think Kathleen Madigan ever did a vagina joke.

Coincidentally, she's also one of the few female comedians that I think is legitimately funny.
>>
>>80473558
That's why Silverman is famous.

She spent 10+ years being the only remotely fuckable chick in comedy green rooms. Have you seen what female comedians looked like up until a few years ago?

And road comics are some of the thirstiest sacks of shit you'll ever see.
>>
>>80473558
I want to fuck Sarah Silverman in her Hitler outfit
>>
>>80478498
Willing to believe.
>>
>>80467914
TRIGGGGGGERED
>>
>>80476055
>Admit you wanted (You)'s
Truly a newfag
>>
>>80454192
seems like pretty okay based on this, desu. not outstanding, but not horrible.
>>
>>80452802
her net worth is less than $2 million
>>
My boyfriend

>audience cheer loudly

My boyfriend dick

>cheering intensifies, people begin whooping

My boyfriend dick my pussy

>fever pitch as the audience are screaming in delight
>>
>>80469971
>>I wish we were raised more like men. Here's an example. Have you ever had a guy cum in your mouth and go, "Does it taste okay? I haven't been drinking a lot of water, and I'm a little worried."
>I don't even know what the fuck this even means

It means that women literally think they are the only ones who get self-concious and that men don't get self-concious and that they are "raised" and "taught" to be this way.

they're all hyper sensitive about how their pussy smells/tastes and don't think men worry or read on the intrernet or eat/drink different things to afect the taste or ever ask if a girl liked the taste.

they're all super worried about the size of their tits, and think men never worry about their dick size. which we all obviously know is insane, and its also blatantly obvious that dick size obviously MATTERS and tit size is nothing but aesthetics.

they worry that theyre fat because they see barbie and supermodels and they think men dont worry that theyre fat because of he-man and atheletes.

ONLY WOMEN ARE INSECURE because women are constantly coddled and men learn to either deal with it or hole up in their basement. Women have so much more of a supprt network for their problems that they literally think theyre the only ones with problems.
>>
>>80454402
He might regret fucking that hooker (male)
>>
If you want to hear Amy Schumer best jokes go watch a Patrice O'Neal comedy special.
>>
>>80452691
She stole jokes and made them worse.
She is Carlos Mencia with a vagina.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQlSDxYSDrg
>>
>>80452691
Paul Blart: [talking to himself] What are you trained to do? Nothing...
>>
>>80452691


Maya Blart: [reading a dating website] Okay, next question. "Tell me about yourself."

Paul Blart: Let's see. I know a lot about sharks.

Mom: Let me stop you right there.
>>
>>80452691
You would have already seen the best jokes from her set.

Only performed by a different comedian years earlier.
>>
>>80452802
Hello amy
>>
>>80454343
I'm sure she has. Probably never one man at the one time though.
>>
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>>80452691

Paul Blart: This lemonade is insane!

Vijay: That's because it's a Margarita, Paul.
>>
>>80480479

Fuck, cant wait for Chapelle's specials. Joke wasn't even funny but he somehow made it enjoyable.

Schumer... fucking christ man. Just pure cringe.
>>
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>is accused of stealing jokes
>standup special on netflix, seen by potentially millions
>steals more jokes
>>
>>80480626
>IN THIS JAR HURR HURR HURR

Damn, I've seen that Chapelle joke many times but he got the first audible laugh at of me today with "CUM ON THE TELEVISION!".
>>
>>80463934
She looks okay here.

But she's found out that being fat and average looking has only helped her career so don't expect her to get thin again.
>>
>>80480665
bom bom bom didididi da dudududu
>>
>>80476055

No problem, since I know this is the only place where you'll ever get attention from anyone.
>>
>>80480382
He didn't fuck any tranny hookers. He just picked them and gave them cash to help them out cause he is a nice guy
>>
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>>80454192
It's like she's trying to be Pam.
>>
>>80454192
>>>I wish we were raised more like men. Here's an example. Have you ever had a guy cum in your mouth and go, "Does it taste okay? I haven't been drinking a lot of water, and I'm a little worried."
I legitimately don't understand this joke
>>
>>80468307

yo, therapy dogs and play-doh are awesome
>>
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>>80456595
The worst part about her stealing jokes is she somehow manages to fuck up material that isn't even hers by adding too much fluff before the punchline killing any sense of delivery.
>>
>>80483790

yeah except pam is actually funny
>>
>>80454482

She literally described her self shooting diarrhea out of her asshole like a machine while vomiting and then she yelled "LIQUIDS OUT OF EVERY ORIFICE"
>>
>>80456823

That'd actually be a good career move. Canadians love eating shit.
>>
>>80452802
>pump gas in jersey

I farm weed in British Columbia and make more than you do
>>
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>>80454192
now this is just another reminder to me that there are people out there to whom cumming in mouths and getting cum in their mouth is a normal, relatable experience

fucking normies. ree
>>
>>80484347
And has nice tits.
>>
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>>80452691
The best joke in the whole show.
>>
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>>80452691
>>
>>80455403
thought of this too
>>
>>80455403
Why is always sunny (pre season 12) so fucking incredible.
>>
>>80452691
no they cant because no one in this thread has seen it including me

oh but wait
>WOMEN
>>
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>>80454192
>Woop fucking woop bitches
>>
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>>80486340
>watching Amy Schumer
Thread posts: 257
Thread images: 47


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