HNGGGH *waddles towards you* Man wha ketchu? yous stillsowe

>>79811110
nope

>>79811110

Cash me ousside. Hou bad dah?

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wha habbin

>>79811110
Is this the movie with that Kino shooting scene?

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>>79811110
Can you name a more badass lawman than Seagal

>>79811683
All seagull movies are Kino.

>>79811718
me

>>79811214
Day tooker

>>79811718
Find the fattest, laziess, most corrupt cop. He's more badass than Seagal

someone post the skateboard webm

>>79812390
He literally invented tactical ambidextrous room clearance, which he personally teaches to special forces units all over the world (only the good guys though).

>>79812390
Joe Arpaio?

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>>79812268
This can't be real

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>>79812524
Former Delta Force operator Larry Vickers was one of Seagals students. He also modeled his goatee from Seagal.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHIGFHaY1uY

>>79812744

>Got to maintain better muzzle awareness

IT'S CALLED BEING AN OPERATOR LARRY MUH BOI

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Remind me again what did Seagal do in CIA?

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>According to William Forsythe, Steven Seagal told Forsythe, "You really need to work on your Brooklyn accent." Forsythe, a Brooklyn native, replied, "Trust me, YOU do."

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https://theflyingguillotine.wordpress.com/2011/08/17/the-ridiculousness-of-steven-seagal-part-1/
Some of the funniest shit I've read in a while

>>79813030
Is Seagal the most out of touch "celebrity" (if he could even be called that)?

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>>79813079
dont forget that Out for Justice was filmed during Seagals "American-Italian phase" when he pretended to be 100% Italian

>>79812986
Tracking down Bobby Lupo.

FATTY FATTY FATTY

>>79813069
Is that Lushenko? ahahah

>>79813069
>dat pic

exploitable af

>>79813210
I think he has a better claim now, i mean, he must be basically made of 90% pasta and pizza.

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>>79812986
>a sex symbol

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>>79812744
two watches? operator as fuck

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Steven "send her to my trailer" Seagal

Didn't he mouth off to an actual martial arts guy, who then choked him unconscious and he pooped himself?

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>>79815512
Nothing but unproven lies

Seagal is unchokeable due to his superior Aikido training.

>>79815512
yeah some 80yo jujitsu guy i think plus he talked shit about van damn then met him at a party and bolted the fuck out

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>>79813331

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>>79815631
what was he thinking about at that moment?

>>79815578
i kind of like that they actually showed a bone break here. usually they just show the arm bending in a way thats actually normal, and then dub a 'crunch' sound effect over it and have the guy yell like hes in pain

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5hb1Hes58E

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J_dnw7uz6rY

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>tfw your hot teenage daughter sucks cock and snorts coke because you're Steven Seagal

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>>79816591
How many daughters he has?

what's next for his career?

>>79816692

What the fuck?

>>79811110
What exactly does he say here? Haven't seen it.

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>>79816692
Just. Perfect.

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>>79816864
I bet you don't you don't even know Steven Seagal's grammy nominated album "Punani Priest".

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>>79812268
Why's there always young girls in his movies

>>79816864

What's the problem?

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>>79816692
Fucking hell this fat fuck is even too lazy to look down the sights.

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>>79817048
>implying he needs to

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>HE'S FAST!

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>>79817076

>>79817009
He only likes the freshest punani.

>>79816692
What is this from
What the fuck is going on
Why have I never watched a steven seagal movie

>>79812268
What?

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>Not putting framed pictures of your album cover in your movies

>>79817009
This is some anime level shit

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>>79817135
>>79817135
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ar-5PAj-YOc

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>>79817179

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>>79817076

>>79817144
Holy shit do you think you fucked her I wish I was an actor.

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>>79817144
Im pretty sure that scene was filmed in his home

>>79817228
was she absorbed by the ring?

What is some essential 2010s Seagal kino? I've only seen Sniper and he had maybe five minutes of screen time in it.

>>79817247
holy shit the world's ending
STEVEN GET OUTTA THERE

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>>79817236
>>79817144

>>79817275
How many guys did he kick?

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STOP THE CAR

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WHOS HOTDOG IS THIS?

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>>79817333
It's the same guy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUjPz7BKjlM

>>79817189
Im excited

>>79817009
Juan Ovuss

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>>79817356

>>79817301
I'll be honest here I'm really jelly of the guy

>>79817275
>Steven, I've come to bargain.

>>79817356
>he doesn't know 1911s have a crit range of 12-20 when attacking a helicopter

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>>79817480
I'm sorry for the girls

Can someone post the "EASY" exploding bathroom scene

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>>79817446

>>79812268
lmao is this from the same film as the shitty sword fight? Is this the reason why theres an eagle's cry when Seagal kills the bad guy? Holy kek.

>>79817541
It would be hard knowing they will never have sex that good again

>>79817009
Segal watches too much anime

>>79812744
the pistol grip is lubricated with burger grease for faster hand transitions

>>79817541
Don't know man even b rated movies like this are still a good way for actors to break into the scene . Also the guy probably only lasts like five minutes

>>79817095
Is he playing Time Crisis or something holy shit.

>>79817095
Seagal literally so fat the need a stunt man to shoot him taking one step to the side while walking up stairs.

>>79817076
This is my favorite.

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>>79811110
D R O P P E D
R
O
P
P
E
D

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>>79817076
*Waddles towards you*

>>79817817
poor guys, they all probably have concussions

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Seagal kino

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_sphOyygcA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zec4w7S1M2Y

>>79817095
OHHHHHH my god.

>>79817817
he turns around like a tank control character

>>79811110
This movie is ridiculous. Steven is barely in it and he does almost nothing. He doesn't even fight anyone.

>>79817866
>kino
Cho zdesya zabyl?

>>79818002
don't tell me you still sowe butdah fiddy buuhs?

>>79817275
I own this film. At first I thought it was an edit, but they really do show the guy being kicked from the window like 50 times.

>Pathological liar
>Became famous for throwing around Japanese manlets 2 feet smaller than him in a demonstration of "skill"
>Wrote his own movies and wouldn't let anyone have any other say
>Once ran over a person's chicken farm, killing 100 chickens and went on to say "I can't stand animal cruelty"
>Refuses to go against other Aikido experts, even when he was in his prime; he preferred sticking to tiny manlets that walked up to him waiting to be thrown
>Domestic abuse

10/10 guy

>>79818101
somebody get this mothafucker birthday outta here

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>>79818101

>>79818148
Nahyeh, he still owe me bough fiddy bus

>>79818185
Is that the worst celebrity AMA ever?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UN0qUGnUo3w

>>79813333
I fucking finally get this gif. I always just thought it was funny in itself. For years I had no idea it was a send-up of Seagal.

>>79818101
>>Refuses to go against other Aikido experts, even when he was in his prime; he preferred sticking to tiny manlets that walked up to him waiting to be thrown

You do know there's no difference between what Mr Seagull does and any other Aikido expert. It's a fucking sham martial art.

>>79818329
Oh not even close.

https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/p9a1v/im_woody_harrelson_ama/

>>79818185
damn man, not a fan of his but those redditors can really be obnoxious sometimes

>>79818443
>calling Seagul a sham

So uh, were you planning on having your next birthday?

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>>79818101
You left out the part where he trained the greatest mixed martial arts fighter of all time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UcNgrp2Ftew

>>79818472
>sometimes
It's a circle jerk of people farming karma with single dad dry humor.

>>79818498

I've never had any punani so it can't be snatched.

Why was everyone in the 80s such an asshole? In the 50s to 2015, the 80s had the highest rate of murder in the US.

Why is this?

>>79818459
That was done by a publicist. Harrelson had no awareness of it.

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>>79818392

>>79818645
Crack.

>>79818645
That's when the darkies started acting up

>>79818645
It was also a lot harder to solve crimes without a witness. Random attacks were nearly impossible to solve.

>>79816692
I bet he wanted a rocket launcher for that scene

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I know hes really fast but try and see if you can spot him.

>>79817072
Is the butt of the gun supposed to be resting on top of the shoulder like that?

>>79819267
no, the guy in the back has it right.

>>79817274
Yes. That is how he gets hes strength.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_TRdFSKGFU

>>79819346
that would explain why he runs like a woman

>>79818023
Newfag?