>be ramses, third pharaoh of Egypt's XIX Dinasty >daddy

>>79487245
You sit down and enjoy the comfiest animated musical of all time, familia.

>>79487245
>Prince Moses, I'm Pharoah

>>79487245
Have him executed for high treason, what else?

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>>79487298
>Yesh, the talking fire rises

>>79487245
>be Ramses II
>actually be a pale skinned ginger
>not even the likely Pharaoh that was during Moses' time
>but normies only know Ramses, Tut, Nefertiti, and Cleopatra

>>79487409
>"Behold, the power of God"
>"Uhh, you don't get to bring friends..."

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>>79487442
the weak link in the meme chain

>>79487409
>we'll take power away from the pharaoh and give it back to you: the chosen people

Was Moses the og Big Guy?

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>>79487511
You're welcome crannogmen.

>>79487245
WE

>>79487245
What you get for being a soulless ginger, cunt.

t. Sea People

>>79487442
>>not even the likely Pharaoh that was during Moses' time
There was never a large Hebrew slave population in Egypt so this is a moot point.

>>79487858
You're right, they weren't Hebrews, they would later become the Hebrews and write their history as though they had always been.

>>79487245

I mean, I can't answer that question validly because I know in retrospect "Moses was right."

Given the info Ramses had? I'd probably try to suck his dick

>>79487245
WE

>>79487409

If you made that specifically for this thread, I applaud you.

>>79487245
There's nothing left for them to do to you, bake them into pies to feed your hungry people.

>>79487245
Why didn't he just gas the Jews?

>>79488346
The shower had yet to be invented.

>>79487409
If I took your staff, would you die?

Why did God need Moses again? The only way they managed to escape was thanks to God anyway.

>>79488453
God is too old and too rich for this.

>>79488157
there were hebrews at the time, but the exodus wasn't one of hebrews. there aren't any recorded calamities of the magnitude described either, so most likely, it was a group of peasants and slaves and outlaws who took the opportunity to bail when there was a storm or something.

>>79488453
Because.

You've got to remember, that a God, whether Abrahamic or not, generally has designs or reasons that are far beyond human understanding. I mean to us, it makes little to no sense. But to a God, there is some type of purpose for the reasons they do things, whatever it is.

>>79488453
God likes to test people, at least in the old testament. He's not just gonna give you the good life, he wants to suffer and if you still follow him after you've suffered, he might award you.
Case in point: book of Job

>>79488601
I bet he's just lazy.

>>79488403
>It would be extremely plagueful

>>79488749
you have a big nose

>>79488594
Hyksos, very related to Israelites, around during Thutmose II, which would have been Pharaoh at the time of Moses in the most likely case, to which everyone related to royalty had the name Mose, which Moses would have been adopted into.

Thutmose II is also the only Pharaoh, and his court with boils on their mummies, which was a Plague described. His wife Hatshepsut which took over, a highly revered woman Pharaoh also described great unrest of the people shortly before her rule.

The other likely Pharaoh being Sobekhotep I, to which there is a papyrus detail slaves at the time, one of which is one of the Slaves mentioned that helped put Moses into the river, granted its a name and names can be fairly common. There was also massive civil unrest at the time as well, which Pharaohs rarely depicted in their history unless it was significant.

The third likely Pharaoh would have been Dedumose, I forget whether it was the I or II, but a volcanic eruption did happen at the time (which would have led to fire and hail from the skies).

In most cases its assumed to be Thutmose II. There was also the rise of the Nile around this time, which would account for a flood, which would cause Frogs to leave the river and be stranded in areas, causing them to die, while flies gathered around their corpses spreading diseases, etc.

You can attribute a lot to natural occurrences barring the death of first borns. Granted you can assume that if a God does exist that he created physics and natural things in the first place and does things through those as to not break the law of physics he himself created. But either way, you can actually generally assume some things about the Exodus fairly well, not perfectly due to incomplete archaeological records, dating issues, and how ancient peoples generally wrote their own history, but you can assume a good deal for it to actually make a lot of sense.

>>79488767
For a Hebrew

>>79487245
Yea the jews are evil whats new.

>>79488789
personally i think the story is an amalgamation of several of the instances you've mentioned. the tale of moses isn't meant to be a historical record, it's a story about how their religion is the bestest and how their god has the biggest dick. during at least early judaism yahweh wasn't the only god, he was the god of the jews. assuming it did happen, it probably had very little to do with the version we know now.

>>79487245
Fill the Red Sea with crocodiles and Landsharks for when it gets parted like in the prophecy you knew about but when it started coming true never did anything about

>>79488872
Well Yahweh likely comes from the story of...Anu? My memory on the Sumerian Gods is odd, but Asherah was his consort, which was a thing in very old Judaism at one point and later removed. Considering the majority of religions come from Sumeria and Egypt.

I mean even in the current Old Testament, Yahweh/Jehova isn't the only God, just the head God over everyone else.

>>79488834
>not "For Jew!"

Leave, and never come back.

>>79488453
>religious text
>logic

>>79487245
the best thing I like in this movie is that all of them are blacks

>>79487858
I forget what they're called, but there was a big settlement in Egypt of the people group the Hebrews eventually came out of. Depopulated pretty quickly, too.

One thing always bugged the fuck out of me when I watch the Ten Commandments. Moses just needed to keep his mouth shut for a year, and he would have been Pharaoh, fucked his hot-ass Princess Wife daily, not to mention any other piece of squish that came by, had armies, respect, all the wealth of Africa, and the uncontested power to free the Hebrews with no problem. Hell, he could have let them build a huge Synagogue between the Pyramids.
But no, he heard he was Hebrew and immediately threw it all away.

>>79488268
It's not exactly difficult or time consuming to attach a Bane mask to a picture. If you're not mentally retarded, that is.

>>79489145
Well he also became a magi conduit for a God.

Moses is an anime protagonist.

>>79487245
Hmmm but what was his tax policy? maybe he deserved it

>>79489074
Fuck off, antisemite.

>>79489034
Interesting.

Also, wasn't the Great flood basically an adaptation of one of Gilgamesh's sagas?

>>794884594
More likely it's a myth. After all the Torah was """miraculously""" found intact when the Israelite leaders returned from exile, which is very convenient when they'd want a unifying story to justify their special ownership of the land.

>>79489145
>moses becomes the pharaoh
>converts egypt to judaism
>jews take over the world

crisis averted

>>79489537
It is, which likely stemmed from the melting of the Ice Age considering it exists in tons of cultures, which includes Native American cultures, which likely crossed the Bering Straight during the Ice Age from Siberia and Mongolia, which are people that came from the Middle East over time obviously as they migrated hunting animals. Granting this was before the Epic of Gilgamesh, but still it all likely is based on the Ice Age melting.

At least to explain why so many distant cultures have it. There was a heavy flood in the Middle East that covered most of the land however, but has no reasoning for why Native Americans and such have a similar story.

>>79489537
>wasn't the Great flood basically an adaptation of one of Gilgamesh's sagas?
The Great Flood myth was pretty widespread in the ancient times. I don't think the Biblical story was taken directly from the Epic of Gilgamesh.

>>79489537
no, tons of separate flood myths.

they probably influenced each other, but they werent copy paste.

keep in mind civilization started in the middle east where people depended on the annual flooding of rivers. so they were thinking about floods a lot

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>>79487245
You become anime Ramesses

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>>79487245
>feelsgoodman.hieroglyph

>>79487245
>Wat do, /bros/?

You just let the fucking Hebrews go. It should have been clear by the 2nd plague that things weren't going to end well. And surely keeping the Hebrews was costing a lot more than the advantages that come with a virtually cost-free labor force?