>be wagecuck >work in kinoplex >advance screening of

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Aren't cucumbers a little bumpy for that, I would use a banana if I had a vagoo desu.

Anyone ever jerk off in a theater? How do these disgusting whores get away with it?

>>79325959
The bumbs make it feel better, actually. As a woman who masturbates a way too much, i should be the one to know

>>79325959
>bumpy
>bad
HPV, bro. Gotta simulate it to stimulate it.

>>79326016
L O N D O N
O
N
D
O
N

why not just watch porn

>>79326016
RIYADH
I
A
D
H

>>79325959
Bananas are probably too soft and too curved. Not that I'd know haha

>>79325959
Those cucumbers are absurdly long

>>79326016
I'd ask you for a picture of your tits but you're probably a morbidly obese landwhale

>>79326014
Double standards

>>79326054
You cumberlet. My cucumbers are this big when they're not even ripened.

>>79325882
If this were true wouldn't they have turned into pickled cucumbers?

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>>79325882
Fake. They didn't take off the plastic wrapper. That shit is sharp and will cut up your insides.
>Know this first hand
I'm disgusting

>>79326089
>plastic wrapper
I don't think that's what that is anon...
I think it's actually to make it easier for insertion

>>79325959
fucking subhumans

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>>79326121
That's what I thought too, but looking closer it looks more like the plastic wrapping they come in

>>79326089
Tits or gtfo whore

>>79326089
What the actual fuck is this picture

>>79326089
>>79326147
I like your apartments, friend

>>79326014
I jerked off in the number 23. I was the only one in the theatre and a PSP full of porn so I thought "hey this movie is shit, why not make the most of it."

fake

>>79326168
Those images look cool but I'd never be able to stand such a confined space. I'd go insane from not being able to get up and stretch

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>>79326157
>>79326161
If I was an idiot it wouldn't be disgusting anon

>be teenage roastie wagecuck
>buy a few cucumbers
>take some snapchats
>unlimited tumblr points

>>79326197
Basically this

>>79325959
why are those seat so dirty?

do you wash it before next movie?

>>79326016
C A L G A R Y
A
L
G
A
R
Y

>>79326239
>do you wash it before next movie?
Hey thinks they wash them. Ever.

>>79325882

Fucking burn society

We're beyond Sodom levels of needing purging

I couldn't imagine working a job where I'd have to clean up all the garbage and trash left behind by lazy, disgusting subhuman fucks all day.
I salute you sir

>>79326089
its condom

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clean up wagie

>>79326258
there are vacuum washer and it can clean it pretty fast

>>79325882
most countries you are legally allowed to refuse to clean up shit, blood and semen. I would imagine vaginal discharge applies here as well. Know your workplace rights.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=llQL9RM_KOo

>>79326319
le funny and crazy guy took that dump

>>79326324
They never did when I worked at a theater.

>>79326241
Leaf poster get out

>>79326055
I'm not a fattie, though. I've been called pretty but my severe social autism really limits me

>>79326319

Really makes you think.

>>79326026
It's from Norway, actually.

>>79326364
>I'm not a fattie,
So your "height weight proportional" then. Got ya.

>>79325959
Womens love them BBC. Big Bumpy Cucumbers.

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>>79326364
Post pic. I want to know what a girl that had cucumbers inside her like me looks like

>>79326352
In my local kinodrome the seats are burned and replaced by new ones after a movie.

Only tight pussied carrot fuckers allowed itt. No kegelposters allowed either.

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>>79326439
Hash tag guuurrrlllls night out y'all

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>>79326363
Hey, No love lost.

>>79326476
I'm betting you're the girl on the right. Awkward wierd girls are always the horniest and most deviant

>>79326439
game ?

>>79326476
I want the middle one pls

>>79326476
Post your tits and get it over with, cunt. You know the rules

>>79326476
If you're the one on the right, I would take you under my Chad normie wing and rehabilitate you into society in a heartbeat. God you're cute.

>>79326690
And how do you plan on enforcing these rules?

>>79326706
Is that a no? Alright, give me like ten minutes

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>>79326746
Errr merr gerrrd is he gonna knock over the card stand?!?!?!

>>79325882
>>79325959
Who the fuck would use a cucumber to masturbate when vibrators are available?

>>79326241
HEYYYYY im from calgary!

>>79326801
My condolences.

>>79326786
The vibe would be audible in the theater
Now a dildo on the other hand...

>>79326706
Who's Caithlin Pena?

>>79326746
You got five.

>>79326476
So how did you end up on 4chan?

>>79325882
>>79325959
Yes, this is a great prank.

>>79326786
>masturbating in a quiet, public place in the dark with an object that whirs and buzzes and beeps.
>not masturbating with a Big Bumpy Cucumber
>the perfection of big, fat, ramming cunt plunges
>sacrificing your ability to dodge being caught by claiming its a snack and nibbling on it
>not taking a huge crunchy, juicy bite of your sweet and sour, vinegary cucumber at the end of the movie whether you were caught or not.

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>>79326830
No idea, but I'm sure you can find out.

>>79326704
kys

>>79326849
She's merried to herself anon, give it up

http://www.yourtango.com/2017299109/good-news-single-ladies-you-can-marry-yourself

https://www.google.ca/search?tbs=sbi:AMhZZiv9jBm-01hBUnRyFDvPcpeNzrdbgVhAa8de8bGJdEKZ2I82VBmx6VMoIBFYi1LPmQD_1RGyjfbZfIYIM7thK7RAl235xU34rxx95uyIjROyAHM-X8jbQNBpg_1n5cU9zSQO_1H9VP_1FGBWUGcI7-y8z9QCI_1yhEPYq3Lr-SH8M_1jBh60MbHpNuuKovpEzc-y-qcnzlSQAO3xwgGJsCn9tuetxDsAeW3ot-E09XHagFdgf_1IFuX4228DzCdvMiTamTsRC_1vPeZ-wOcMyYBaSrPpe0GntEuPPkEqQy3EoqUA_1yjnuNjDzhNeEOq4QRxe0HJNd0WwobuUl_1SDVSJlKmlNcqX5MjOBd8ptzOzRNB8aze5SZRxswADCfGHAyEB39j_1r-UIEcGQvYhwI3GXG_1ZoL8zXGKLdBo9JQk8ViCDGkW0gHJ668hZlcPhVskgHYNs8gEXbrl8yPPMqP8z9efn9WbnU8ID7B5tI2SUx8LtbI4fJGpKRQpFvt6EJkzrZVb7FLEq-KoATJ4htSwPWgEyVqBTp54jiVB9xxBROoHQgUsL5iu--50_1dGGqG1Vx-OmfocTUC9wyunQq0QeYW_1SQSOnsBng5cGXbavOMgWxpfSmRPsh2ZEI0T-SnwFcg5_16otfhxyHDrZr81bPyNE1stjax6-U9vxYE52FU4F_1aM0TmMPtn328EG1Z3SrNceykOFPvU1kP-a6x-yjy0UA1jpsnL4jiYZc0MfvEDIcuZadXW6qwtR6UpL3LSj1e-gsCQEIKGf3lYZ6kYOWMABjkkl28QstzoX1EC-eBBJTdbNue7D7QpM_1cFBvw33ALq_1RPNC-GUttHla8cEdb_19-mh16jb5Rtx7Kw6e5jFAOkWD9BvgHJeeEwl_1bGWx1K1V9c0LTt6ptLcUUI-uK5STwBzAw0Pa9LbB7PD40C2rBHMZSlmcpQ-kF-5jQp_1NmYzXL4SybNFsPRMwM5f0w5eBAyx_1tXWqU-RQMrVBRtfA0Gxjsn_1zSuDKTL0ttzpIyMqmb9guoJ2oy2xNiPuyJEa2wklWGlSC-bnhZe4VBC4xTYSZqEr--z1UVVRou6S3iNHFH1ii1rWEZer1eP3Er5Vrn6bnUWglWWKSYkg_1QYVkoJ81_1i4_1kndf36Z9DfevYfb6Eu15N4CiaPxfOKQpimKS-SgUybDAU4GrPXjTT2ix_1f3XbYEhb2xepikwUMpC5LEPdoL6zSzd-tyq_1qjNAXRuooYxBPI85KMvj352aS7q-LGISlmEgIYqhMLCXtZJt9-AUNXwXr55RTWGz6h8BY6_1EeUza1CDizxrcYRM8S715oCgh4Jo1bfHPED3KQdVt6nRSTUpSHqViPUnom94f2Wrfrp1BDYrW9N5agPYjDzHr_1vWJY5aNwvlt70a43_16EH931ar6hfxvTPbq7MNFrbxTB1IauLZZkKHiX100vfjc_1nXXrjwhfzVW3mjOsNBaqD0_1mMumhiM9IOck3vtwkWZQC0kXw0xI7jVrlplkUUAFWiNskvspa2s19v4cdM7xLt_12QUuxYUSxLve-CIN7qR7YySnx6f9VItfmgrCu-AG8Px64LKoJW2fIhNpBxaacbDM8vAZmzt6vwQHTsx8AxxzRtB6DfkoUT4Nq4IzxC50tucqFFn6iQ9dkvgL-uQ&gws_rd=cr&ei=ZUyfWITpNpG6jwTQlYTYBQ

>>79325882
Women are so fucking disgusting you should see their bathrooms holy fuck.

>>79326319
Man, I'd just walk out at this point.

>>79326054
As expected from country grown vegetables.

>>79326783
Those were better days

>>79326915
good post retard

go hate women somewhere else

>>79326829
>The vibe would be audible in the theater
>Who has their phone on?

>>79326026
Explain this meme, please.

>>79326039
50 shades IS porn, same as Twilight, its women-porn.

>>79327117
> male-feminist thinks he owns this place

GAHHAHAHAHAHA

>>79326364
Any time someone says "I've been called pretty" that instantly means fat and ugly. Pretty girls know they are pretty, despite crippling autism.

>>79326476
I'd do ya whether you're left or right.

I have low standards though

>>79326364
>I've been called pretty

yeah some men are just horny

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>>79327382
Don't you people ever google reverse search images?

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>>79327326
Bump

>>79326089
what exactly am I looking at here?

>>79327483
Cyberpunk + A E S T E T H I C + r9k-fags wishing they were ideal girls

>>79326335
Someone has to clean it up, though. Who is it?

>>79327326
You guess where she lives and if you get it right she has to post nudes.

>>79326335
I worked with a fryer before I got promoted and God damn this is terrifying

>>79326786
you can't eat a vibrator afterwards

>>79326476
Could you stomp my balls with those boots? :3

>>79326335
Fucking hell, I will never carry a pot of boiling stuff again.

>>79326054
For you

>>79326016
I S T A N B U L
S
T
A
N
B
U
L

>>79325882
lol

That theater must hate its employees.

>>79326319
>hold paper towel at the connecting points with gloves, snip and flush the whole contraption.

Wow, so difficult.

>>79326182
>psp full of porn

Are you literally me from 4 years ago? Thought I was the only one with a PlayStation pornable

>>79327326

london has the highest amount of trannies

>>79325959

bananas are too small to satisfy a woman

>>79326014
Guess what: I'm a woman

I've been using 4chan for 8 years now. I'm an MIS and Marketing major, top of my class. I have an IQ of 146. I'm only a sophomore and have had 7 internships. I'm a member of the MENSA society. I'm voting Trump. I'm not a feminist, however, I'm probably more intelligent than most of you in this thread.

Wether you like it or not, females are comperable. I'm not here to steal your money. I'll probably make more than you. I'm not going to make you a sandwhich, I'll have my personal chef do it. The ironic thing is my father married for looks and I'm actually attractive as well. Cocky? Yes. Ashamed? No.

I won't show you my tits, I'll be your CEO one day.

fucking roasties

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>>79325882
did you sniff the cucumber?
what did it smell like?

>>79328611
suk muh dik bich lmao

>>79328611
>I'm voting Trump. I'm not a feminist, however,

>>79328611
You're lazy and worthless just like every other woman, let me give you some personal insight on the matter.

I've been with my wife for 10 years now. We met in high school, and I got her pregnant.
She is and always has been a lazy person and a shit cook. I wouldn't even mind eating shit food if she at least made it on time. But she rarely did.

We'd get into screaming arguments constantly about how lazy and worthless she was. I felt like an asshole for it, but goddamn she was a real piece of work. The only reason I dealt with all this was for the kids, and also because the sex is great.

But one night, I got fed up. Not only did she get drunk, neglect the kids, and made me top Ramen for dinner, but she decided to give me attitude too. She was being real fucking bitchy. So I told my grandparents to keep an eye on the kids and told my wife we were going to go out and have dinner together. I drove maybe 3 blocks to a quiet area (we live in Oregon, it's not hard to find a quiet field) and I got out of the car, went around like I was going to open her door for her and let her out, and I just beat the shit out of her while she was still seatbelted. After a few punches, I asked her if she wanted to go back to her parents. She started screaming and yelling and said yes, so I beat the shit out of her again. Then I asked her what she wanted to do. She finally got smart and said she wanted to go home. So I took her home and dared her to start trouble. I even handed her my cellphone and dialed her mom's number on the drive home. I made her talk to her mom, while daring her to fucking say something.

Before that incident, I had never laid a hand on her. But I had always threatened it. I told her "one of these days, if you don't straighten up, I'm going to lay hands on you."

All my meals have been on time, and she just recently tried to make a meatloaf. It was mediocre, but I was just thrilled that she tried.

Do with this information what you will.

>>79328611
awful bait

>big booty qt from work calls in sick
>realize the guy she is always talking to has also called in sick
>realize its the night of this released
>shes never actually ever talked to me

how do i escape this hell?

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>>79328611
>IQ of 146
>Wether

>>79328611

https://youtu.be/YWdD206eSv0

>>79328742
You got baited so fucking hard lmao

>>79328742
>making up absurd power fantasies on an anime image board

pretty pathetic desu

>>79327729
This. Who the fuck ends up cleaning it up then?

>>79328611
>Guess what: I'm a woman
>no boobs

Stopped reading there

>>79328850
the military

>>79326335
That dumb bitch could just angle the pot the otherway so it doesn't go on her whole fucking face and kill her

She deserves it

pick it up wagie

>>79328522
The psp came out like 13 years ago. I remember cause my friend had one after christmas during freshman year.

This is among the worst threads ever on /tv/, even more so than the BLACKED and cunnythreads

>>79326089
it's like an anon's fantasy of the kind of femanon they wish existed

>>79327071
It an english cucumber you dope

>>79327062
This. Fuck working minimum wage for this type of work. Anyways I make sure to piss all over the seats, seat covers, and toilet paper. I don't even take a shit I just go in the stall to piss. Also, I pay for one ticket only. When the movie is over I take other peoples' empty large popcorn buckets and sodas and get free refills.

>>79329323
And not only that, just like this anon said >>79326089 every english cucumber that I have seen always have the plastic.

>>79325882
You have reminded me something I prefer would stay forgotten. There was this the worst theater I was told about and we decided to visit it, Aside from looking like abandonded shithole it had 2-3 people working there, When we bought tickets and went to get loaded, we found out that they wouldnt start showing the film because we were the only one to purchase tickets, Inside it was very dirty with used condoms, bottles, SYRINGES lying here and there, Very bad.

>>79329441
Sad!

>>79329441
>>79329465
Not even trump can make dollar kinoplexes great again

>>79328505
i've seen some toilets in my day anon. that much paper would clog it 110% in my professional plumber opinion.

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They're pickles now.

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>>79325882
pr behind this movie are probably proud as fuck

>>79329954
>No singles policy is real

Told you cunts. Better get a gf or get ready to never enjoy the cinema experience in all it's glory ever again.

>>79328611
>All these (you) for this fresh copypasta
its a goodun

>>79330042
>Fresh

Get out.

>>79325882
>>79325959

could you imagine the smell in that place?

>>79326335
>that scream

i was expecting some unintentional camp but that was pretty chilling

>>79326026
>>79326041
>>79326241
>>79328370

how do you faggots not get the stupid "our system thinks your post is spam" message?

I just want to meme too

>>79326016
D U R B A N
U
R
B
A
N

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>>79328611
>comperable

You're a fool.

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>implying this isn't more of the viral/gossip news marketing scheme to promote a shitty sequel.

Just like the "No single men allowed".
Just like the "Theaters replace with plastic seats".

You're a fucking gullible tard if you believe this for a second.

>>79330387
Xangelix is......a fool

anyone have the webm of the grrl writing for you in period blood? lost it when my phone died

>>79327117
wait what? showing that the picture is not authentic means you hate women now?!?
Who the fuck are these people? are we being raid by leftypol again ?

>>79330957
cuck

>>79328611
Fucking a tsundere CEO is my fetish.
Wrestle me naked you she-devil

>>79328742
>number
By your spelling alone i can easily tell you are a underaged dimwit from /pol/ fantasizing.

I just quit my job today. I can't stand wageslavery. I don't how people spend years doing that shit. I'm going back to school or just looking for another job that isn't full of toxic employees.

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>>79326016
L O C A T I O N
O
C
A
T
I
O
N

Why do you guys keep saying "wagecuck" in a shameful way? Do you all not have jobs too? I don't get it.

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>>79330199
Ohhh god

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>>79331423
If you're not your own boss, don't receive a salary, or aren't a tendie-boy, you're a failure at life

>>79326016
T U R N O V O
U
R
N
O
V
O

no one under 30 is slapping their bean in a theater.
Anyone sensible is going to jack it on their laptop without the risk of getting caught, sparring the outlier freak chicks

those are middle aged and old lady dildoes. There's no joy in them.

>>79330248
T O O B A D
O
O
B
A
D

>>79328611

how can u retards fall for this pasta, really

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>>79328893

>>79326319
what the fuck is that supposed to be

>>79325959

Why even bother with the epic cucumber meme when you've got those filthy seats to show off?

>>79328982
what, you mean hold it upside down? The boiling water would just fall right onto her feet you unbelievable idiot

Worked at the cinema couple times quit after it took me hours and hours cleaning up all the fucking popcorn. There's so much fucking popcorn you guys can't even imagine. Teenagers are the worst they'll buy extra large popcorn and these niggers will kick it when it's half empty as they're leaving and laughing

Why do parents not tech their kids manners anymore.

>>79325882
next level viral marketing

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>>79328611
Do I smell a fresh spicy pasta?

>>79331873
Do your fucking job, cunt.

>>79331916
It's been around for ages newfag

>>79326054
BIG GREEN COCKS

>>79331602
is the green thing in the middle a portal out of that hellworld?

>>79327326
it originates from /fit/

>>79326604
yes

>>79325959
Bananas require serious lube to insert. They're fairly form fitting once you get it inside you just because of how mushy they are, but the skin grips like crazy if you don't properly lubricate it.

N-not that I know from experience or anything.

>not masturbating with a Big Bumpy Cucumber
>the perfection of big, fat, ramming, squelching cunt plunges
>not relishing at the cinema builds during the errotic parts of the movie into a choir of squelching plunges
>sacrificing your ability to dodge being caught by claiming its a snack and nibbling on it
>not taking a huge crunchy, juicy bite of your sweet and sour, vinegary cucumber at the end of the movie whether you were caught or not
>not rolling your stuffed mouth in long, struggling chews as cucumber juice and tang run down your chin as the credits roll

>>79326089
An esoteric sort of hell, is it not?

>>79328611
Old

>>79327326
>>79327436

i think its from fit or the bodybuilding forums.

a female posted pics of her body, some guy posted: please be in london

the phrase is a meme ever since

>>79333075
anon you are inserting vegetables into your body through the wrong orifices. try the mouth, it's easier to consume food this way.

>>79327326
>being this new

This place is dead

File: clean it wagie.webm (3MB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

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CLEAN

IT

UP,

WAGIE

>>79328611
Nice pasta, gonna use this for future threads.

>>79328611
>MENSA
more like menstra

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>>79334515
This person should hang

>>79334677
Yeah I'll hang around in the parking lot laughing my sides off while you clean it, wagie

>>79328611
>females are comperable.
Well done, faggot.

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>>79326500
hi /k/anakuck

>>79325959
Those are zucchini, not cucumbers

>>79326319
Dude, any manager would tell you to lock the booth and let the ukrainian maids do the job during the nightly cleanup.

>>79327729
>>79328850
Waste removal services exist, but some desperate wagie would probably end up doing the dirty work just to earn favor with massa

>>79334807
It was avatar so it was worth it.

>work in a kinoplex
>obliged to check out if anybody in the audience is recording the movie
>watch women's bare soles on the seats in the summer

Try and tell me this is a shitty job, you fucks.

>>79334515
what a jerk

>>79334441
Huh.

Well I guess that explains why I couldn't taste anything. Thanks, anon!

>>79331916
>fresh
this pasta is quite stale actually

>>79326500
What the shit? Two capers in one thread? What are the chances b'y?

>>79331328
What was your job?

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>>79334784
*snickers nefariously*
*sabotages election*
"H-have fun with your electoral reform.!1"
*Teleports to Ottawa*
>>79334950
Also what the flying fuck. I knew there was some faggots from here in Louisbourg. But I thought there was only like three of us for 100,000 people.

>>79334807
10/10 you made me made. You absolute faggot.

>>79326016
E A R T H
A
R
T
H

>>79334987
Sydney Mines here, I mean what else is there to do in CB aside from shitpost annoyomously?

>>79334987
>*Teleports to Ottawa*
Good, you can come to the next meetup :DDDDD

>>79330248
PUTA
U
T
A

Try being white, that helps.

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>>79335100
>Sydney Mines
My condolences, Everyone knows Edwardsville and Westmount is the best neighborhood.
Also, You can shoot things. Or bury a flight case full of Oxycontin in the sand near Lingan.
>>79335101
Fuck no, You have to go back.

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>>79326335
>that scream

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>>79334807
this made me sad

>>79334515
on top of that it's a disabled toilet

>>79328611
"btw guys i'm a grilllll"
"pay attention to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"
Fuck. Off.
Fuck off.
We seriously do not care. We don't care about your day, we don't care about your boyfriend, we don't care about your issues. One thing we certainly don't care about is your fucking opinions. Jesus Christ, why did you make this post? Did it benefit, inform, arouse concern in ANYONE? No. You posted this because you are a solipsistic whore who thinks she matters because guys like her facebook photos. I can hear you just now, you're thinking "but i don't have fa-" SHUT THE FUCK UP. I don't care about your fucking tumblr either. It's a site where you post pictures of yourself for validation, hell it could be /r9k/ for all that matters - you are still an attention whore. The guys that have called you beautiful on omegle have convinced you that you have any kind of worth, guess what: you don't. You're valued for a vagina. That's it. Nothing else. Why you think owning something that 50% of the human population owns makes your opinions worthy of shit is fucking beyond me.
Words cannot describe the utter amount of hatred I have for you. I cannot stand your vapid personality, the way you look so clueless all the time. You are a literal robot who lives for nothing more than getting validation from random guys on the internet i.e. us, and you think we're going to tolerate you parading your fucking boring thoughts on our board? Think again, cunt. Girls like you are the most boring people anyone could ever meet, because you do nothing but talk about some guy you met on here or what was on tumblr or your hair or some song you supposedly like or just SOME OTHER SHIT WE DON'T CARE ABOUT. Fuck you. You have the audacity to expect us to care when you never provide any interesting discourse or state something interesting, you literally just consume and regurgitate SHIT. We whole heartedly despise you, and you should never forget that.

>>79334515
MODS MODSMODS

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>>79334900
>watch women's bare soles on the seats in the summer

Did you record anything?

>>79334737
what about the rest of us that just want to piss and shit without touching your piss and enjoy dry tp?

must we endlessly hold it until we get home?

>>79334594
lol

>>79335332
I banged my girlfriend in a theatre back in 2012 to that Stallone movie.

>>79329713
Nah those commodes are hardcore they can handle that little amount of toilet paper

>>79335332
What kind of pervert do you take me for?
They don't let us have phones on shifts, lad.

>>79325882
>picks up cucumber
>smells like crabs legs

memes are real.

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>it's a "euro shit nufriends from reddit get triggered by old bait" thread

>>79327326
i was in the OP thread. from fit circa 2010-2011?

someone posts their huge ass, tinytrip - a small midget bodybuilder, replies "pls be in london" (he lived in london)

smarter anons recognized the make of a man's ass. tiny did not. dude reveals he's a man and tinytrip was forever mocked by LONDON.

welcome to 4chan please enjoy your visit from reddit :^)

>>79328742
It ain't the 50's anymore kid, you'll actually go to prison for that shit now.

>>79328742
this is pastakino

>>79328742
Same boat, never hit the bitch, shattered a mirror with my fist once, ceased her bitching for like a month tops, guess I have to have another testosterone fueled outburst

Do American women really do this?

>>79335100

Hey man. Do you know a Maria?

>>79326335

Dis is fuggen hilariuos :DDDD

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mai2s5MSrsc

>>79328611
>INT: 16
>WIS: 3

>>79328742
assed my laugh off

>>79326335
Fuck I love Canada.

>>79328742
Holy shit we have reached response pasta evolutions. Everytime the MIS pasta happens, someone needs to respond with this pasta.

>>79334515
Heh. Former coworker of mine got fired for beating the mother of fuck out of a kid who did this in our bathroom.

>>79328982
>slip on grease
>"HOLD UP A SECOND, LET ME READJUST THE ANGLE OF THE POT"

>>79326783
undefeated? like hell

>>79335474
>Explain this meme, please.

>>79325882
there was a town about 15 minutes away from my hometown, and they had a five theater cinema that allowed people to rent out an entire theater for a showing. the only people who worked there were three adults and they all seemed creepy. I watched the last showing of a movie and my friend had to piss, and as he drove and had the keys I waited for him in the lobby. one of the employees kept reminding me that it was time for me to go but I would remind him that my friend was in the bathroom. he finally finished, we went to the parking lot which was almost empty except for us, and a car arrived as we got to my friend's car. a man and a woman got out, went to a fire exit of one of the theaters, knocked, and someone let them inside. we thought it was weird at the time, and later we heard a rumor that the theater owner was a swinger and regularly played porn in one of the theaters for swingers to have orgies. I never returned to the theater after that since I didn't want to sit in a cumstain or a seat that had a dudes taint rubbing against it.

>>79334807
You're just a shitty son.

>>79334807

You piece of shit.

>>79325959
there deep whores

>>79334807
Jeremy? I knew it!

I regret giving birth to you. I should have gotten an abortion.

>>79330248
NIGGER
I
G
G
E
R

>>79326016
Women cannot masturbate. It's a scientific fact.

>>79336029
you shouldve joined the orgy you idiot.

>>79334807
Did this became a pasta?

>>79334737
So you have autism, right?

>>79334515
I do the exact same shit lmao

one time I almost got my ass beat cos right after I did it and left, the owner of the bar I was in went in to take a shit lol. I pretended to be drunk off my ass and agreed to leave the bar. Good times, good times. Ofc I still do that shit every public place I go.

>>79326014
>Anyone ever jerk off in a theater?
Regular theater or porn theater.
They used to show porns at the drive in. Fucking awesome.

>>79325959
>Porn and masturbation ruins men
>Cucumbers and dragon dildos don't make women loose you sexist pig

>>79328611
>have had 7 internships
>doing it for free this much

>>79337678
they don't, you idiotic virgin

>>79337799
A woman who is used to fucking herself with a cucumber is going to have trouble going back to normal human penises.

>>79337829
t. eternal virgin

>>79325959
dicks aren't perfectly smooth

>>79326241
>>79326801
then there were 3

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>>79334807
this made me sad
i really hope this is a shitpost and not real

>>79337860
t. eternal prolapsed vagina

P R A G U E
R
A
G
U
E

anyone?

>>79325882

THATS A ZUCCHINI

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its the meme movie and cucumber meme that virgins believe in

any woman who wanna do some shit in the theater watching this movie will use her own toy
no woman will go buy cucumber and use it in theater kek or even less likely she will use one that some random guy/gal gave to her before the movie

>>79325882
>>79325959
Why are women allowed to be autistic creeps in public?

>>79326844
kek

>>79328775
>It's a Truman doesn't recognice pasta episode

>>79336923
most people that participate in orgies are the same kind of people that you don't want to participate in an orgy

>>79338238
>no woman will go buy cucumber and use it in theater kek or even less likely she will use one that some random guy/gal gave to her before the movie
It appears you're mistaken and that this indeed took place. You also seem to be under the delusion that your assumptions apply to everyone.

>>79338238
Exactly, if a chick was going to do something in the movie she'd just use a toy of her own.

Most of all though, is i've seen the movie, and there is nothing fap worthy in it, it's actually really soft and boring. My gf didn't even get wet or horny cause we were just laughing and talking about how awful the acting is in it.

>>79339050
Bitches get off to written books, you have no idea how they function.

>>79339077
Well yeah no shit, she reads romance books and gets turned on all the time, the reason i even saw the movie was cause she read the books and wanted to see it.

My point is that movie is apparently far off from the books, and the acting is just awful so there's nothing you really get from it.

>>79339050
>>79338238
Owning sex toys is still a taboo among older women. They didn't used to sell these at the drugstore or Spencer's. You had to go to a porn store or order a "massager" from Vermont country store

>>79328611
BACK TO THE KITCHEN WOMYN

>>79338306
Because the left thrives on double standards.

are cucumbers mentioned in the book or something?

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>>79326476
>nasty pig faced roasties
No cat picture can accurately convey my disgust

>>79338193
underrated

>>79326241


REAL YYC HOURS HIT THAT FUKKEN LIKE BUTTON

>>79325959
I shoved a cucumber up my butt once
But it created anal tearing and i think it gave me hemmorroids. I bleed everytime i poop now.
That was 4 years ago. I still bleed

>>79326915
>https://www.google.ca/search?tbs=sbi:AMhZZiv9jBm-01hBUnRyFDvPcpeNzrdbgVhAa8de8bGJdEKZ2I82VBmx6VMoIBFYi1LPmQD_1RGyjfbZfIYIM7thK7RAl235xU34rxx95uyIjROyAHM-X8jbQNBpg_1n5cU9zSQO_1H9VP_1FGBWUGcI7-y8z9QCI_1yhEPYq3Lr-SH8M_1jBh60MbHpNuuKovpEzc-y-qcnzlSQAO3xwgGJsCn9tuetxDsAeW3ot-E09XHagFdgf_1IFuX4228DzCdvMiTamTsRC_1vPeZ-wOcMyYBaSrPpe0GntEuPPkEqQy3EoqUA_1yjnuNjDzhNeEOq4QRxe0HJNd0WwobuUl_1SDVSJlKmlNcqX5MjOBd8ptzOzRNB8aze5SZRxswADCfGHAyEB39j_1r-UIEcGQvYhwI3GXG_1ZoL8zXGKLdBo9JQk8ViCDGkW0gHJ668hZlcPhVskgHYNs8gEXbrl8yPPMqP8z9efn9WbnU8ID7B5tI2SUx8LtbI4fJGpKRQpFvt6EJkzrZVb7FLEq-KoATJ4htSwPWgEyVqBTp54jiVB9xxBROoHQgUsL5iu--50_1dGGqG1Vx-OmfocTUC9wyunQq0QeYW_1SQSOnsBng5cGXbavOMgWxpfSmRPsh2ZEI0T-SnwFcg5_16otfhxyHDrZr81bPyNE1stjax6-U9vxYE52FU4F_1aM0TmMPtn328EG1Z3SrNceykOFPvU1kP-a6x-yjy0UA1jpsnL4jiYZc0MfvEDIcuZadXW6qwtR6UpL3LSj1e-gsCQEIKGf3lYZ6kYOWMABjkkl28QstzoX1EC-eBBJTdbNue7D7QpM_1cFBvw33ALq_1RPNC-GUttHla8cEdb_19-mh16jb5Rtx7Kw6e5jFAOkWD9BvgHJeeEwl_1bGWx1K1V9c0LTt6ptLcUUI-uK5STwBzAw0Pa9LbB7PD40C2rBHMZSlmcpQ-kF-5jQp_1NmYzXL4SybNFsPRMwM5f0w5eBAyx_1tXWqU-RQMrVBRtfA0Gxjsn_1zSuDKTL0ttzpIyMqmb9guoJ2oy2xNiPuyJEa2wklWGlSC-bnhZe4VBC4xTYSZqEr--z1UVVRou6S3iNHFH1ii1rWEZer1eP3Er5Vrn6bnUWglWWKSYkg_1QYVkoJ81_1i4_1kndf36Z9DfevYfb6Eu15N4CiaPxfOKQpimKS-SgUybDAU4GrPXjTT2ix_1f3XbYEhb2xepikwUMpC5LEPdoL6zSzd-tyq_1qjNAXRuooYxBPI85KMvj352aS7q-LGISlmEgIYqhMLCXtZJt9-AUNXwXr55RTWGz6h8BY6_1EeUza1CDizxrcYRM8S715oCgh4Jo1bfHPED3KQdVt6nRSTUpSHqViPUnom94f2Wrfrp1BDYrW9N5agPYjDzHr_1vWJY5aNwvlt70a43_16EH931ar6hfxvTPbq7MNFrbxTB1IauLZZkKHiX100vfjc_1nXXrjwhfzVW3mjOsNBaqD0_1mMumhiM9IOck3vtwkWZQC0kXw0xI7jVrlplkUUAFWiNskvspa2s19v4cdM7xLt_12QUuxYUSxLve-CIN7qR7YySnx6f9VItfmgrCu-AG8Px64LKoJW2fIhNpBxaacbDM8vAZmzt6vwQHTsx8AxxzRtB6DfkoUT4Nq4IzxC50tucqFFn6iQ9dkvgL-uQ&gws_rd=cr&ei=ZUyfWITpNpG6jwTQlYTYBQ

do you think that link is long enough?

>>79340522
congratulations you raped your self.

>>79340522
go to the doctor fuckwit

proctologists see way worse shit than that all the time, no shame

>>79326335
Woooooh that shit right there.

>>79326915
That's a big link

>>79331873
I laugh at you.

>>79333075
There is a chance for the wandering spider to spurpt out.

>>79341037
4(you)

>>79340522
Thats the funniest shit!

>>79334807
bad sons general
>my mom is an idiot
>like, not a joke, just a dumb woman
>she's the most compassionate person ever, but she can't fathom simple concepts
>this year she wanted to bake with me
>all she did was find a recipe that melted butter and threw it on crackers and chocolate, was awful
>because I said I liked it she made it every time she came over
>she was the type that was beautiful growing up and never developed any talent or skill
>and now she's getting older and still dresses like she's twenty
>she's moving away with potential husband 3 and asking me if I hate her for it, but I kind of resent her for her assuming I dote on her
>like, always mining for compliments from anyone present
>had to learn how to walk after a freak accident paralyzed her, but now she's too stubborn to wear her ankle brace and cane in public
>I get mean with her when she doesn't

I love her, but I can't stand being around her. She's annoying and I can't relate to her, I can't lean on her (because she can't support me, emotionally or financially), and she's so fragile every minute's walking on eggshells so she doesn't take something literally and get offended.

and I found out my elder fetish crackhead cousin conned her on facebook trying to get her naked

>>79341286
My mom is exactly the fucking same. There is nothing sadder than realising you're smarter than the people who made you

>>79326973
this
>previous job included cleaning bathrooms
>womens bathroom was a complete shithole
>only problems with the mens was cigarette butts, and some nignog stealing the toilet seat

>>79330248
BUY A PASS
U
Y

A

P
A
S
S

>>79329905
>because she knows I feel suicidal when I see handsome men
iktf

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>>79334807
you're a fucking cunt
fuck you man, avatar? neck yourself

>>79326319
once again I meet the elusive poopcradle

>>79326241
OH SHIT YYC REPRESENT

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>>79326335
i'm a janitor

>>79325882
so just pick it up, what's the problem?

>>79345259
he's american. he'll get so hungry he won't be able to stop at picking them up

>>79328775
Being this much of a retard lmao

>>79345542
but it's a fruit. I thought they hated those.

>>79326089
This is from Vahalla

>>79325882
so um those are thin as dick


guess girth ain't matter

>>79325882
Even if it's bullshit, it's still pretty funny.

>>79345800
You keep tellin yourself that, pickle-dick.

GREENED

>>79326016
ATTENTION WHORE

>>79326016
M A R S
A
R
S

>>79334807
kill yourself