>Oh hi anon, why didn't you bring your wife with you?

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>>79088627
CRABLEGS NIGGA

>>79088627
why thank you tyrone, i have great respect for you as my wife's son and as a gift i will soon be granting you a baby brother :D

>>79088627
Thanks tyrone. Hows mum?

Weren't you promoted to assistant manager, Robert? Not that I dont enjoy your popcorn handlings.

>>79089791
Robert rejected the promotion because he loves his current job

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>>79088703
>>79089743
>tyrone

>>79089743
>>79088703
Get out /pol/ tourists.

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>>79089992
>>79090020

>>79088627
You sir are mistaken. I always bring my wife,

>>79088627
Shouldn't you be on a basketball court?

>>79088627
Hey Robert

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>decide to go to my local drive-in theater
>get into my beater with my waifu
>she's a dakimakura, but it's dark, so maybe nobody notices
>put a whistle over my exhaust so it sounds like I have a turbo
>finally arrive at the booth, ask for a couples ticket
>"Nice muscle car sir, you can't imagine what people try to sneak in nowadays"
>reply "Haha, thanks" and step on the pedal, my exhaust whistling merrily
>nearly crash into the guy in front of me, slam the breaks
>he gets out of the car swearing profusely, it's a huge jock with a baseball bat
>quickly drive off, sweating profusely, to the shadiest corner I could find
>park, look at the drifting competition going in front of the screen, wait for the commercials to start
>fall asleep because it's the middle of the night, be woken up by gunshots

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>>79091956
>turns out it was just customary shots at the beginning of the movie, I haven't missed anything
>watch the movie for some time, get bored
>notice that people around me are all making out, get anxious
>thankfully my dakimakura has a built in fleshlight
>grab her, unzip my penis, and start going to town
>as I'm about to cum, suddenly the door to my car opens and I'm forcefully pulled out
>turns out it's the jock I bumped into earlier, his buddies are holding me and I can't escape
>"well, well who do we have here? I've been looking for you"
>reply that I don't know who he is
>"Bad memory you've got there friend, maybe your gf will remember, eh?" his buddies start laughing
>start screaming rape, they punch me and silence me, jock gets into the car
>"You need a real man, like me - not a wimp like that guy, gir... what the fuck is this?"
>He gets out with my dakimakura, it's the worst moment of my life, drop lifelessly to the ground and start crying
>They start kicking me, they torch my car with my waifu in it, get stabbed
>by some miracle crawl to the nearest hospital and get patched up
>no insurance, so a 500 000$ bill for 10 stitches, my life is ruined forever

>>79088627
PLEASE FUCK MY WIFE

>>79092035
I'm sorry sir but I am happily married to a beautiful white woman, I would never cheat on her.

>>79089980
he loves his job just like he loves my wife if you know what I mean

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>>79092053
>he actually is