ITT: Pokemon are real (An RP thread.) What's you opini

>>9909058
mahina cro pls save us

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>>9909058
I'd like to go up there some day, but for now I'm content to build on the ground.

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>>9909058
Outer space?
I'm interested in exploring it and the moon.

>>9909058
Terrible horrible awful no good very bad.

>>9909058
That Devon Corp should get their fucking act together and have there space program colonize somewhere. At this point I don't care where.

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>>9909058
It's shit. Like everything else.

>>9908960
You look like a fruit.

>>9908972
Eat a dick. Except you'd probably like that.

>>9908979
You deaf? Drunk. Kissing. Making out. I thought you fairies were all about that.

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>>9909069
And I thought Ghost specialists had teams filled with ghosts, not Poison types.

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>>9909058
The final frontier, p. much.

>>9909129
Is that a fucking challenge?

>>9909133
That's Kanto to you, where a single decent enough Psychic can sweep any dedicated Ghost team.

>>9909133
Hon oui please, the entire gengar line is poison ghost.

>>9909049
Can I get your discord for reasons?

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>>9908947
>He's a level 23 and knows Splash and Teleport. That's it.

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>>9909133
I'm not stupid enough to have a monotype team with a useless goddamn theme. Unlike some people. Stupid barnacle fucker...

>>9909146
Get a job! I pay taxes damn it! Goddamn liberals ruining everything...

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>Missed the new thread by 30 seconds
>>9908960
Eeveelutions huh? What kinds?

>>9909169
(Time to turn him into a HM slut)

>>9909179
(Ha, except he can't learn any moves via TM or HM)

>>9909179
(Literally can't learn ANY hm)

>>9909188
>>9909196

(I'm sure if you stick it in far enough he can)

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>>9909169
"Well... that's kinda underwhelming"
>Quincy lets the gas cloud out of the ball
"So, you going to be good and stop dropping stuff on my head now?"

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>>9909147
Yes, but she goes further in having an Arbok and Golbat as well.
>>9909174
Except you do. You have a mono Poison team.
>>9909146
Truly the worst league.
>>9909207
(The last person who tried to stick something in Pew lost his dick.)

>>9909226
Strong words from the man who can't catch a fith Pokémon. Seriously is finding another fish too hard for you?

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>>9909218
>The cloud flops on the ground and throws a fit the moment it leaves the ball, wailing and crying onto a black plush.

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>>9909226
...Look goddamn it, I'm not listening to Koga bitch at me again, so we're going to pretend I'm ghost/poison not mono poison. Heathen ninja punk. And his daughter too. Dresses like a hussie!

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>>9909226
To be honest, leagues are lame in general.

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>>9909264
The Kalos league restrictions on teams make for rather underwhelming Elite Four teams, I will give you that. They won't even let me use my Blastoise, is downright shameful.
>>9909298
And I'm sure Lance is actually Dragon/Flying, non?
>>9909332
And you prefer...? Contests?

>>9909332
I wish they wouldn't insist on going with type based teams. If they really need a theme then battle synergy teams would be so much better. Why not a rain team, or a sun team, or an entry hazard phazeing team, or trick room or anything. There is so much potential for serious threats and they go with the easily countered type teams.

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>>9909295
>God damnit that was his favorite Heartless plush
>Yes he has those, he's a weeb
>Now he's going to have to wash it out
>Ah well
"Hey now, there's no need for that... here"
>He grabs a doughnut and offers it to the sapient space dust

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>>9909348
>The old woman is stunned
>h-he KNOWS the dark secrets of the Kanto E4!
Shaddup honhon.

>>9909357
You disrespecting tradition boy? Don't make me get my switch! I'll whip you good!

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>>9909371
PEW!
>The space puff angrily smacks the doughnut onto the ground. He snatches the plush, running off into the kitchen with it and digging through the cabinets.
>Rolling for a thing.

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>>9909371
Boss this is beginning to be a problem, why having you just put it back into its ball, we took care of the interruptions, that's all you wanted right?

>>9909343
Well, i'll have some f-free time soon so..

>>9909388
Just because its tradition doesn't mean it's nessesarily the best way. All I'm saying is, if you tried a trick room team with a Chandelure, I feel like you would like it a lot.

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>>9909414
>Quincy sighs and goes over to it
"Come on dude, don't be all angry about it, at least I let you out of the ball right?"
>He offers a fresh doughnut, having gotten trashed the dirty one
>Good thing he just picked up that box today

>>9909432
"Oathkeeper, I think I'm actually done with the Statue-City for tonight, this little guy is a rarity, the public probably doesn't even know it exists, and now he's with us, whether he likes it or not, and you know that I prefer pokemon to like being with me"

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>>9909388
Your "tradition" didn't allow for the use of Dark Types, but I don't here you shrieking about that.

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>>9909483
It's your call boss. Want me to track him down again?

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>>9909461
The hell is a Chandler? Who's Chandler? He one of Joey's friends?

>>9909484
Bah. Keep your damn krows off my lawn.

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Reminder that all pokemon need to be raped and shot.

>>9909509
No, it's a ghost fire type, ma'am.
And a powerful one at that.

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>>9909174
Just because I pay my taxes outside of Kanto doesn't mean I don't.

>>9909484
Or Steel types. Or Fairy types.
Unfuckingbelievable.

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>>9909483
>Pew stares at the doughnut for a second, snatching it and retreating back into the cabinets.
>A container of beeswax has made its way onto the counter, along with a few random spices.

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>>9909504
"It's fine, if he manages to wander off and get lost I can recall him, but for now he's right here"

>>9909569
"And... trying to cook something?"
>Quincy spent a fair bit of time watching Cam and Ace do rituals
>Rolling to see if he can recognize this one, 0 and 2 fail

>>9909529
>Raped and shot full of hot cum
Ftfy

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>>9909483
> A portal opens up above Quincy
> A deluge of keyblades come out

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>>9909589
>The space puff continues his search for materials, wandering off into his room in a quest for needles and thread.

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>>9909636
>Okay these garbage """keyblades""" are getting really annoying and it's obviously not Pew
>What the fuck
>Into the dumpster they go

>>9909684
"Hey... uh, Cosmog? What are you doing? You don't need those to cook something..."
>Very confused weeb noises

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>>9909755
... pew.
>Aside from that acknowledgement it says nothing, dropping the needles and thread off with the beeswax before hunting down cloth and stuffing.

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>>9909755
This is some voodoo shit boss. Not a fan.

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>>9909809
>Neither of those are hard to find
>Actually there looks to be a whole room dedicated to cloth shit
>There's several copies of his cloak hanging on racks as well
>Cosplay nerd makes his own shit at least

>>9909831
"It's getting moderately concerning, but if I take the stuff away he's going to get pissed even more, so for now I'm gonna sit here and watch him work, and if it's something bad, he goes back in the ball for a while"

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>>9909854
... pew!
>He snags one of the cloaks from the rack, looking much like a classic movie ghost as he floats back to the counter with the stuffing.
>The puff ball starts with the beeswax, molding and patting it into a humanoid shape.

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>>9909908
Ok boss, this shit is getting pretty sp00ky. If you start to feel weird, just say the word and the puffball goes night-night.

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>>9909908
"...Even I can recognize voodoo bullshit from TV, this is something bad"

>>9909967
"No need for that, I've got a better solution"
>He holds out the Ultra Ball and recalls the Cosmog
"...I could use some help cleaning this up though"
>Time to return everything to it's rightful place
>And then pass the fuck out
>Sorry Pew, you're staying in the ball tonight

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>>9909967
>>9910041
>Pew: balled.
>He's gonna be mad as fuck when morning comes.

>>9910071
(Good job dude, that was actually tense and interesting)

>>9910086
(Thanks man, I'll try to think of some more interesting house hold spook shit for Pew to do next time.)

>>9910121
(IC: please don't)
(OOC: please do :D)

>>9910121
(Dump more useless keyblades)

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>>9910041
(When can we hope to see more of the sister?)

>>9910174
>annon fighting the good fight
>asking the real questions

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>>9909348
Nah, it's just that league battles and gyms are kinda... boring. Either a trainer comes in and gets smashed because they don't understand any of the semi-advanced concepts of battling, or they come in after spending a few weeks training a pokemon with a type advantage.

And then after they win they exile said pokemon into a pokeball on the PC so they can get other type-effective ones to battle the next gym.

>>9910174
(When I find a place to put her)

>>9910244
Sounds like you have a problem with bad trainers, not the league itself

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>>9910901
The league profits immensely off of said trainers and the profits they bring in. The allure of league fame and prize money only serves to encourage that same exploitative behavior in the future too.

Pokemon that truly want to become great battlers are not categorized by their love or skill, but by their types. Trainers that try to battle with their life long friends fail because they usually lack the diversity that a more 'capture to win' mentality brings.

I've never liked the idea of trainers and never will, but I can accept many other pokemon enjoy that bond. But the league by its very nature, from the type-based gyms to the media giants that it feeds, is detrimental to that kind of bond.

So yea, congrats if your a trainer who by chance met your friends and they had a good mix. That doesn't stop the fact that for every decent human trainer, there are droves who are so mesmerized by the promises of fame and fortune that they degrade any sort of pokemon-human relationships they have into a fancy game of rock-paper-scissors.

Of course, the common excuse will just be 'not-all-trainers'. But that's irrelevant, because exceptions are just that, exceptions. Their existence does nothing to stop the trend.

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>>9910982
What about trainers who do both? They find the Pokemon with the typing mixes they need, and become friends with them.

>>9910982
I... I never looked at it this way.
>Anon pour a drink and pull out the old photos of you and your team and contemplate the past and your existence

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>>9911013

Look, if you grow to respect and love your pokemon that's great. But that doesn't stop the fact that before you caught them, you weren't looking for someone to be friends with, you were looking for someone to help you get a dinky little pin to put in a trophy case. No matter how great your relationship might become, it's ultimately built on a pyrrhic dance because it will always be marred by the fact that it only came to be due to a desire, YOUR desire, to get some gold star stick award. No amount of time, love, and respect can change that kind of diseased foundation.

>>9911095
((Sticker, not stick award))

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>>9911095
Except that's not true, yes I went looking for a specific species of pokemon, yes I have the goal of defeating the League with them, but that doesn't change the fact that they're my friends, and more importantly, they're each other's friends, lovers even, and they never would have met had I not helped them along the way!
But I see your point at the same time, I think I'm one of the exceptions, and part of the reason I want to defeat the League is to abolish some of it's outdated and absurd practices.

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>>9911119
Purity of friendship is in the serendipity of meeting. But I doubt anything I have to say will convince you otherwise, so just go back to your league approved game of chutes and ladders.

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>>9911187
...That's the most absurd hippie bullshit I've ever heard, and I've been to Celadon, friends are the people you can depend on to hold you up in the good times and the bad, and that you can hold up in return, how you meet doesn't matter, be it online, in the wilderness, introduced by family, whatever, if, at the end of the day, you can count on each other, and you like being together, that's all that matters.

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>>9911187
>>9911095
Meowth with the real talk

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>>9911202
Being friends is about the genuine respect you have for others. A relationship built from a desire to pursue your own interests will never have the same kind of genuine feeling that comes from being drawn to someone out of mutual interest in one another.

What you have with your pokemon is surely a friendship, but it's tainted because it's initiation lacked a basic respect for their whole self, because it was prejudicated by what they were, not who. How can anyone call that kind of disregard of the self respectful? Because it simply isn't, and no amount of time together can ever change that whatever relationship might have flowered, was planted in tainted soil. Just like a majority of friendships between trainers and their pokemon are, all due to the league and its seductive glamour.

>>9911274
Thanks I guess.

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>>9911321
Then what would you suggest, that I just abandon the pokemon that I've bonded with? Obviously tainted friendships can't last, can they?

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>>9911334
Ofcourse they can last. In fact, for all the vitriol and hate I have for people like you, I truly hope they do. Friendships are still friendships, even if they are not the most dignifying. That though doesn't mean the current state of things isn't a depressing wreck.

I suppose I should be insulting you, but I'm just kinda worn out after working myself up over this. I'll just give you an IOU on that.

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>>9911334
Do your pokemon follow orders begrudgingly so or do they do it because they genuinely want to help you with your goals?

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>>9911408
Well, that's part of why we fight, we want to change things, at least in Kanto, Johto too, since they're the same League, I'll keep what you've said in mind, maybe I can be the last big bad bitch trainer, and anyone else that rises up to fame can do it in a better way.

>>9911412
Drax does, he's the one that kinda got me started on all this, Trace seems to have a score to settle with the world, and is glad to beat the everloving shit out of every gym we come across, Mal is... angry, angry about rocks, but I'm pretty sure he enjoys this, Kylar and Lulu are hyped up as all fuck about everything, including beating gyms, and Remmy is... well, he's the only one I don't really know for sure, I guess I'll ask him once he wakes up.
(OOC Drax is the only character I'm making assumptions for because Vi started with her, hence Remmy not having a stance on it, no one plays him.)

>>9911439
(Is Drax a PC? I don't remember seeing anybody post as them)

>>9911523
(Someone posted as her for a little bit but then they got dropped for... some fukkin reason)

>>9911527
(I might pick her up, what sort of personality did you imagine her having?)

>>9911571
(Timid Nature, take that however you want, I tried not to give her too much personality so someone could just drop in, but keep in mind Vi has no clue Drax is a female and it seems like Drax doesn't care about that)

(Have a bump)

>>9911439
>Throws scythe at

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>>9909058
There is too much of it!

>>9909058
I am paying Colress Five Billion Unova to develop FTL travel, that's probably the best way to sum up my opinions on space.

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>>9912713
...Where did you get that much money!?

>>9912728
The family fortune, invested and reinvested over the past two centuries or so until Five Billion Unova became something that I could spend without putting myself into any debt, in fact, should I get access to this FTL technology, I shall have made quite a return on this expenditure.

>>9912740
(To be honest, given the similarity of prices to Yen, its not THAT much)

>>9913514
(He said Unovan, which means USD)

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Good morning guys!
How's it going?

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>>9913697
Poorly, I caught a new pokemon last night and it doesn't seem to be very happy about the situation, I tried being nice to it, offering it food, asking to be it's friend, all that stuff, nothing, I had to put it in it's ball for the night so it wouldn't kill me!

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>>9913859
... it tried to kill you?

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>>9913899
I think so, anyways, it started making a voodoo doll out of beeswax and stuff.

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>>9913908
Wow, that's kinda...
Um... I guess it's really mad about being caught!
Where'd you find it?

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>>9913971
It was hiding in my house and teleporting random things onto my head.

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>>9913992
... that's kinda weird, what was it? An Abra?

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>>9914201
No actually, my Pokedex couldn't even identify it for the longest time, apparently Catalyst calls it a... Cosmog?

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>>9914411
Oh! That's really cool, I had a Cosmog once! They um... They aren't from this dimension so I really don't know what that one's doing here but um... Yours is gonna be a Cosmog for a reeeeeeeeeally long time!

>>9909529
>touches crotch

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>>9914436
Well, I'd assume so, since the pokedex says nothing about it evolving, I just hope that it learns more moves than Teleport and Splash, for it's sake.

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>>9909457
(sorry for the late response had a power outage and decided to sleep)
that's great
when you want you just have to call me

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>>9914517
They evolve, it just takes like... A few billion years! Unless you force it or something, but that's really bad!
Um... It won't learn any other moves until it evolves for the first time, and then it's just Cosmic Power!

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>>9914601
That... seems strange, why would a pokemon have absolutely no forms of offense available to it?
More importantly, what in the world is this pokemon that it takes a few billion years to evolve, and why does it want to kill me?

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>>9914630
They're mini stars! They just kinda float around and teleport away from danger until they're dense enough to evolve and that's normally when they're um... 4.3 billion years old! And then I guess they just sit for another billion years until they're ready to evolve again? I'm not sure, Nebby wasn't too clear on that part!
Um.... I guess it just really didn't like being caught!

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>>9914742
...That would explain the appearance.
So in theory, could someone just shove matter into a cosmog to make it evolve faster without hurting it?
As for my personal problems, well, this is going to be interesting, I'm letting it out now.
>Quincy lets the cosmog out of the ball, and attempts to care for it
>Please don't stab me

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>>9914766
I mean... I guess, but it wouldn't be noticeably fast! Like... All the stuff in your house might shave off a year or two? Out of 4 billion?
All of the Cosmog I've seen had their evolutions forced, but it's um... Not good to do that!

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>>9914766
PEWWW!
>Pew angrily bats at Quincy's hands and attempts to make a break for the kitchen.

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>>9914798
>This cosmog dissed the dubs
>Come on man, work with me here
>Hug/restrain that gas cloud

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>>9914817
>Dude a stranger kidnapped him after letting a sword beat him up, I don't think you'd be receptive to hugs and shit either
>Especially not as a little kid who was taught the rule of "stranger danger"
>You've managed to restrain the puff cloud - not that it's a difficult thing to do, all things considered - but he's not making things easy. It struggles and smacks at Quincy with its puffy little arms.

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>>9914893
"Dude, please do not try to voodoo me or kill me or whatever, alright? If you want a sandwich or whatever we can make it, but I'd like to not get stabbed, okay? If you're mad about Oathkeeper I'm sorry, we thought it was a mean abra!"

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>>9914941
>Pew stops suddenly, going completely still and silent outside of the occasional upset pewing.

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>>9915135
"...Better now? You want something to eat?"

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>>9915165
>Assuming he's set down, the Pew floats and bobs over to the kitchen, immediately ducking into the cabinets again.

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>>9915273
>God damnit cosmog
>Do I have to stick you in the fucking ball again
"Argh, come on dude, I'm trying to be nice here!"
>Try and stop him from making another voodoo doll thing if he's making one
>If he's just hiding, let him be for now

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>>9915408
>Opening the cabinets, you can see that he's not doing much aside from hoarding all of your spices into one massive pile in the darkest corner of the cabinet, which he promptly sits in and stares at Quincy.

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>>9915430
"...Why do you like the spices so much dude?"
>confused weeb noises
>at least he hasn't spilled them everywhere yet

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>>9915479
>If the puffball could speak he would likely say something about Darkrai and Gadreel, and how their house always smells like spices and herbs.
>Alas, he is restricted to but only one word:
"...pew!"

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>>9915511
"...Alrighty then, just don't make too much of a mess please"

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>>9914488
>cartwheels nakedly

>>9910244
>>9910982
>>9911095
>>9911187
>>9911321
>>9911408
(I like how his moods change so seamlessly)

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>Wakey wakey Vi
>Time to BTFO the last Johto Gym

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>>9915799
>Alpha Necrozma Appeared!
Insufficient location data... Corruption at 56%.
WHERE AM Iplease help CURRENTLY LOCATED AT

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>>9916311
PEW!!
>The small puff cloud rushes over to Necrozma, papping at its fingers

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>>9916311
>Quincy pauses mid-lick of a popsicle
>OH SWEET ARCEUS WHAT THE FUCK
>Contain your panic Quincy, this isn't the first time a Legendary has shown up outta fucking nowhere
"...Johto, Blackthorn City, my house"

>>9916350
"...Little dude I'm gonna let you know this guy can probably kill us before we can blink, please do not antagonize it, I don't know what it is but it looks legendary and it talks"

>>9915858
>talks confusing bullshit
>and tells him to turn off his console

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>>9916350
HellO cosMOG.
>Attempt to pet, rolling for skill.

>>9916361
LAT AND LONG PleasehelpSE

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>>9916417
"uhhh"
>One dex search later
"35.3594° N, 136.6128° E"

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>>9916361
>It blinks at Quincy a few times before returning to papping Necrozma
>>9916417
Pewwww~!
>Pew makes a happy chirping sound at the pets, floating up to sit on Necrozma's hand

>>9909058
Mega evolution >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Faggot dance one time move shit

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>>9916477
WHERE WILL I find COLRESs in reputation -rrrrrrrrrrr- relevance to this?

>>9916497
HEllO CosmoG
>Attempt to pet from better angle, rolling for skill.

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>>9916497
"...Well, that's something at least, you two seem to get along"

>>9916552
"If I knew I would tell you, uh, is something wrong? You seem kinda... sick?"

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>>9916552
Pewpew!
>The puff cloud paps the hand that pets him, attempting to initiate patty cake
>>9916574
Pew...?
>It makes a confused pewing sound, papping Nec's hand and staring at Quincy blankly

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>>9916574
core corruptuonn at 57%

>>9916697
hello cosmog!
>attempt patty cake
>rolling for skill

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I sense heretics about.

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>>9916749
"...core corruption doesn't sound good, uh, hang on, lemme see if I can get a hold of Colress online"
>Threadposting is go
Hey guys, has Colress been around today? We've got an urgent issue that needs his attention.

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>>9916824
If you're asking about FTL travel I'm already working on it.

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>>9916749
>It's kinda hard for a giant rock monster to play patty cake with a puff, but it didn't go too horribly.
>The puff giggles excitedly and tries to speed up the patty cake

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>>9916887
No, uh, bigger issue than that, I think? There's this weird like, black crystal robot kind of pokemon that says it's core is corrupted and it needs to find you. Here hang on I've got a picture
>>9916896
>Snaps photo of cosmog trying to play with necrozma and uploads it

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>>9916824
hello cosmog

>>9916896
>its on now
>jk his corruption left him with shit all speed
>rolling for if he can keep up

>>9916758
nothing heretic here suck no one is having sexual act with their pokemon, no siree

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>>9916919
>Audible sigh.
If he can teleport tell him to teleport to 40.778954, -73.973940. Above Castelia.

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>>9916928
>The giggles just keep getting louder until Pew eventually messes up the patty cake himself. He seems a bit disappointed that the patty cake is over, but contents himself with clinging to Necrozma's arm instead

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>>9916968
Got it, thank you! Uh, he said his corruption level was 57%, I don't know if the level matters or not but yeah.

>>9916928
>>9917026
"Alright, dude, Colress is at 40.778954, -73.973940. Above Castelia City in Unova"

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>>9917026
>Attempt to continue patty cake

>>9917164
Thank you Cosmog.
>Rolling to teleport there.

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>>9917219
>The puffball is glad to restart patty cake, or would be if Necrozma didn't just teleport.
>Pew was sitting on Necrozma when this happened, does he get teleported with him?

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>>9917328
>8
>I guess so?
>well they're somewhere in castelia its a start
Hello, where is Colress?

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Hello, human here posting for advice. What are human things to do?
So far I've gotten my licence and gotten drunk. What else?

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>>9917458
... pew?
>Having no idea what a Colress is, h points in a random direction excitedly

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>>9917552
Watch a movie?

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>>9917599
ThaaaaT wwAY!
>Necrozma follows Pew's direction and smashes right through a lightpole on his way to Virbank

>>9917552
Get a girl or boyfriend?

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>>9917614
Remind me what those are?

>>9917766
Is there any point to that?

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>>9917810
It leads to pleasures of the flesh.

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>>9917763
Pew!
>And they arrive in Virbank, not a Colress in sight. A few moments of confused sounds come from the puffball before he points again,gesturing at the gym.

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>>9917810
Uh.... A set of moving images that tell a story?

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>>9917847
The pleasure of flesh? What do you mean?

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>>9917983
Good old fashioned fuckin'

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>>9918018
F-fucking? That's..quite lewd.

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>>9918102
You know it

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>>9917847
What of what? Like vore? I'm not into that.
Unless souls are involved I guess.

>>9917931
I'll give it a try.

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>>9918121
Are all fairies this..direct?
They seem to be very willing to fuck.

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>>9918211
Yes.

>>9918211
Now, and that's not even an actual sylveon. It's just a human pretending to be one. Stupid perv.

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>>9918211
You only get a corporeal form once in life, may as well enjoy it.
>>9918237
See he knows~
>>9918245
What do you mean I'm not an actual Sylveon?

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>>9918167
Oh, you sweet summer child. The Nymphani talks of sex.

>>9918237
>>9918288
Well, faeries seem to lack any sense of subtlety..or manners.

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>>9918288
I suppose.

>>9918370
1. I am older than you.
2. Why do I care about this?

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>>9918396
i've seen pokemon with worse manners

>>9918568
>throw chandelier at

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>>9918494
Oh, you probably don't, Lugulabre, I'm merely correcting an error.

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>>9917890
>Quincy went to the pokecenter to recall his lost space dust
"Sorry little dude, I don't know if he actually made it to the coordinates he said he did, teleportation is weird long distance, and if you got lost, well, that'd be a bad time for everyone"
>He pats the cosmog
"I'll ask Colress if he made it there when we get home, and then once he's all better it'll be more fun to play with him right?"
>When did Quincy acquire dad skills
>Or are these big brother skills

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>>9918396
Well consider where you are, it's not as if I'm walking up to you randomly to talk about sticking a penis into my vagina, this is a forum where people are (supposed to be) mature enough for this kind of talk.
>>9918494
Why does anybody care a bout any activity? Because it's enjoyable to some extent.

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>>9918606
w-what?

>>9918652
>throw unit 2 at

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>>9918641
>>9918668
Give me a second.

>>9918704
>Chandelier has been cursed to be a human so, uh.
>FC time.
"...A pleasure to meet you."

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>>9918668
Well, you've stumped me there, it's just that I never would've expected something so innocent as a Sylveon to be so, explicitly horny.

>>9918668
Why are sylveon always crazy about something, for one it's violence for the next it's sex then it's money then it's food or just fucking, something, every time.

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>>9918751
It's a product of their upbringing.

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>>9918751
>>9918779
Whatever do you mean? I'm just having a conversation, you're acting as if I'm holding you down and demanding you breed me~

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>>9918748
umm
hello?
who are you?

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>Vi you overslept
>Wake the fuck up
>Be glad this is the last gym in Johto or you'd have been wasting a long ass time
>Let's try this again, this time without being dumb and using Overheat on a Kingdra
>https://play.pokemonshowdown.com/battle-gen7customgame-591258842

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>>9918842
True, I wonder what could've caused them to be like this..
>>9918843
W-what?! No, i'm not!

>>9918668
Adult and mature are two different things. Being only interested in getting pounded is adult, not mature.

I'm just glad she isn't representative of all Sylveons. Most aren't rabid nymphos.

>>9918905
Probably a broken trainer-pokemon relationship that revolved around sex being the only way to get attention from said trainer.

Unfortunately, with sex being their only talent, they are terribly boring.

0/10 would not breed

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>>9918863
>Fuck gyarados
>fuck that fucking bitch cunt shit FUCK
>Vi lost because Gyarados got to dragon dance around her grave, RIP
>Go back to the pokecenter and do some fucking training

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>>9918859
"Would you believe me if I said I was a human?"
>He's already looking through her clothes.
"Is all of this for sale?"

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>>9918652
>That's a very mad puff you have there - it throws a fit the moment it sees where it is. Despite it's crying and wailing, it still manages to locate the cabinet, dragging a thing of salt with it into the empty corner.

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>>9918913
>>9918949
Who said all I was interested in was sex? Quit making assumptions.

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>>9918905
Likeliest cause is conditioning from the affection given that caused them to evolve in the first place.

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>>9918961
well you are a human...
i would be worried if you said that you weren't a human, these kind of people are wierd
but yes they are for sale

>>9919021
I'll stop making those assumptions when your not lewd to lewd post ratio is under 20%

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>>9919060
>Now you've got the not chandelier's interest.
"Pokemon that become humans? Do you know something about that?"

>>9919033
>>9918949
Well..maybe they can get a therapist, to help them with their lewdness problem.

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>>9919107
In my time posting here I've made plenty of 'not lewd' posts and I find it amusing this all stemmed from me answering the guy's question about the point of having a fling in his short time of having a body.
>>9919217
Explain to me how being casual about sexual things is cause for therapy.

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>What're we going to doodle on Tobias today?
>Let's go with... Rayquaza..s.

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>>9919205
well
kinda...
>she remember that day that she was human for some hours
yeah

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>>9919309
"Did the evil old woman leave yet?"

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>>9919292
Well, I mean..something about it to me is a bit TOO casual, usually people wouldn't be so..open about sex.
Or maybe this is a fairy thing..I don't know.

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>>9919327
"I'll tell you what, payment for your help."
>Several gold pieces, embossed with names of ancient kings are dropped on the counter before the strange visitor leaves.

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>>9918965
>Quincy sighs
>Hopefully that doesn't end in him dying or being tortured
>He's trying to befriend it but shit just keeps happening

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>>9919367
>The pen is returned back to Alain's chest pocket.
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure. I didn't see her when I woke up, anyway."

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>>9919430
>The puff leaves the cabinet a few minutes later, searching the house for a candle or two.

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>>9918956
>there, boom, it's sunset, that counts as night right?
>Kylar is now evolved
>now how the fuk does one deal with a gyarados with this team
>ROCKS
>They had to go through Union cave on the gym route
>Fucking Rock Slide on Kylar
>BOOM
"...I think we stand a decent chance again, I'm really, really sorry about that last battle"

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>>9919416
t-thank you
>she is surprised by the gold coins
well, have a good day

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>>9919411
I suppose it's possible that being forced to live alone from such a young age caused me to not learn some social boundaries on apparently touchy subjects.

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>>9919491
"Hopefully she died."
>Tobias pulls the pen from the pocket, drawing a crude map on Alain's neck.
"Sabrina is next, correct?"

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>>9919570
>Rock Slide? I meant Rock TOMB
>Fucking
>Rematch, let's go
>https://play.pokemonshowdown.com/battle-gen7customgame-591272119

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>>9919570
>>9919636
>Testing out his new body
"Woooooow..."
"Lets go!"

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>>9919618
Well now I just feel bad for you.
Sorry you had to go through that.

>>9919805
>throw a brick at
go away

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>>9919634
"I think so. Are we actually going to battle her, or do you want to rob the gym?"

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>>9919805
Eh don't worry about it. It took a couple years but I eventually found a nice trainer who took me in and I have some good friends.
>>9919831
How rude.

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>>9919636
>>9919688
>It's official: all gym battles before this were flukes
>Vi sucks as a trainer
>Fucking so close there Mal, so close
"Just gotta practice, change our movesets, and try again, practice, change the moves, try again"
>Oh right Trace got her literally all the fucking things
>Let's go with some meme as fuck shit
>King's rock on Trace for those air slashes of justice
>Protect on Kylar so he has a chance to heal and not get ice'd
>speaking of ice let's put Ice Beam on Remmy for some actual SE damage
>And then we TRAIN

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Hello, everyone!

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>>9919933
Hi!
I don't think I've seen you here before?

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>>9919861
"Unless you're afraid of getting smashed we should fight her."

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>>9919933
How are you doing Serene?

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>>9919881
Well, that's good that you managed to pull yourself together!
>>9919831
Ow!
>>9919933
Greetings!

>>9920020
>throw another brick

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>>9919911
>those numbers
>everyone fucked up at training, nothing gained
>but at least the movepools are changed
>and I meant to put the King's Rock on MAL, excuse me
>fuck
>this is her last chance for the day
>let's go
>https://play.pokemonshowdown.com/battle-gen7customgame-591278642

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>>9919953
Well, I'm rather new, and my Pokedex kinda broke a while back... turns out those things really, really, REALLY don't like it when they get wet, who knew? Anyways, I got my flippers on a new one, so hello there! My name's Serendipity, or Serene for short!

>>9919988
I'm doing great! Still haven't gotten my flippers on a permanent home, though, but I can manage.

(Is the new meme shitposting people until they want to leave because holy shit I want to leave.)

/par/ I've found the ultimate form of self harm! Every time you want to cut yourself instead brush your teeth (or eat something minty) then take a 12oz shot of orange juice!

>>9920097
>>9919988
Oh, I almost forgot, how are you doing?

>>9920020
Hello there!

>Serendipity the Brionne, saving images

(Wait there are two broinne, or an imitating fekker?)

>>9919911
(Kings rock won't stack with air slash flinch)

>>9920118
Calm down satan.

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>>9920097
>>9920138
I'm sure you'll find something soon. I'm doing well myself, here in Castelia with my trainer for the time being.

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>>9920138
If you don't mind me asking.. what are those frills on your body for?
>>9920052
Cease your brick throwing!

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>>9920169
(I think there's just one Brionne, a Brionne named Serendipity?)
>>9920097
Hi Serene! I'm Sun! Are you having fun?

>C abandons knaifu
>ciphergrunts abandon her
>flygon abandons her
every
fucking
time

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>>9920183
Castelia? I think I've heard a few things about that, what's it like?

>>9920232
I'm... hm. I'm not sure. I think they just look cool, to be honest.

>>9920240
Sun, huh? That's a cool name! Wait... are you the actual sun, as in the big bright light in the sky when it's daytime, or...? ...Oh, uh, yeah, I have been! ...Having fun with what?

>>9920169
(...Erm, who would be the other Brionne?)

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>>9920170
(doesn't matter all that matters is that Vi fucking won, holy fuck that gyarados in the first attempt had me pissed)
>>9920083
>VICTORY
>DRAX BY THE SKIN OF HIS FUCKING TEETH STAYS ALIVE FOR THE VICTORY
>Trace was there even if Drax fell but still, fucking finally
>Rising Badge get
>Dragon Pulse TM get
>She doesn't give a FUCK about that TM tho
"...Let's go home guys, and then, like, take a fucking break for a few days, train a bit, maybe, and then get to the Kanto gym circuit"

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>>9919549
"...Dude if you're doing a ritual to hurt me in there I have to put you back in the ball for my own safety, just letting you know"
>Quincy watches the cosmog work

>>9920240
(Sun is irresistable and you're goat at rping him! I wanna kissu and hug him!)

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>>9920308
It's a big and busy city from what I've seen so far.

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>>9920342
I don't think it's voodoo this time boss. That being said, I can't rule out any other occult shit.

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>>9919967
"Alright, let's go."
>Alain heads outside and immediately regrets it, hissing as the sun hits his eyes.
"Fuck, how much did I drink last night?"
>He lets his head thump against Charizard's back, groaning and pulling the cloak over his head.

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>>9920308
Have you ever been on land?
Can you even GO on land?
>:thinking:

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>>9920407
>Tobias chuckles.
"I may have spiked the wine. You want me to get Darkrai out?"

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>>9920308
Nope, I'm not the sun in the sky, silly! But people say I'm as bright as it!
Um... Having fun here? Talking to people and stuff?
>>9920364
(Awww, thanks anon! I'm glad to hear you like him!)

(I was thinking aboit grabbing a pokemon on someone's team. Is there anything I should know about that? Are pokeballs habitats and do they make pokemon do everything the trainer says?)

>>9920509
not this shit again
fuck off hb

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>>9920342
>>9920392
... pew.
>A little ring is made from the salt, the two candles placed in the center on either side of Pew. The puff does a chant - or as much of one as he can with a one word vocabulary.
>Ghost summoning ritual: possibly complete. Whichever ghost that wants to can answer, if none do we can just say it failed.

>>9920509
(Fuck off.)

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>>9920536
You caaaaaaalled?

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>>9920412
That's a silly question, I'm typing this to you while on land because Pokedexes don't like water, you silly fox! I've actually been on land for a couple of weeks now. The only real problem I have with it is... well, at this point my belly's all red and scuffed up from my having to drag it around...

...Okay, rethinking that, maybe living on land isn't actually the best idea if it's going to do that to me... but I like everything else about it!

>>9920381
Oooh, that's cool! The biggest city I've seen is Hau'oli, that's actually where I am right now.

>>9920474
Hehe, that's silly! Yeah, I've been having a lot of fun, there's so much to see and do that you just don't get in the ocean! It's amazing!

>>9920509
(We literally had a giant arguement about what's inside a Pokeball not that long ago. I'd like to think there's nothing manipulative about the Pokeballs unless it's a Master Ball, though.)

>>9920530
>>9920556
(uh?)
>>9920568
(Alright...)

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>>9920509
(No to both of those. A trainer basically has as much say over what a Pokemon does as a parent has over their kids or an owner their dog.)
>>9920466
"Yeeeees, my head hurts like hell."

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>>9920536
>>9920563
"...A pokemon just summoned Giratina in my spice cabinet, what is my life"

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>>9920563
Oh fuck! Boss! Looks like it's go time. As in we need to go the fuck away.
>swoops in between Giratina Quincy.
>not very confident in his chances
>oblivion where u at

>>9920509
(friend balls have some affect on how a pokemon perceives their trainer)

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>>9920568
That's cool! What's your favorite thing about land?

>>9920509
(First one hasn't come to a conclusion second one not really.)

>>9920650
(Speeds up Le Stockholm syndrome)

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>>9920599
"Then it shall be done!"
>Darkrai is sent out.
>Rolling to get to Sabrina's Gym, accuracy roll.

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>>9920568
Ooh! You're in Alola!? What kind of food and restauraunt's do you have there?

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>>9920636
>>9920563
Pewww!
>Pew flings himself from the cabinet and at Giratina, clinging to his leg... and making a disappointed puff sound when he realizes it's not actually his father.

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>>9920636
>>9920649
Helloooo~
Good to see you again, Quincy.
>>9920754
What are you looking for, small one?

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>>9920679
>Charizard is returned to his ball, Alain thumping his head against Tobias' back instead.
"The light hurts, Tobias. Are we there yet?"

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>>9920563
Lord Giratine, sir. What brings you to our humble abode? I can assure his unholyness that these shrines to Arceus are not our doing. In fact we were JUST in the middle of desecrating them, RIGHT BOSS?
>ghost nudge
>ghost nudge

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>>9920803
"You too, Giratina, though it's a little odd how this Cosmog I found knows how to just summon you up like that"
>Glance at the pew
>What secrets does he hide

>>9920829
"Relax Oath, I already talked with him about this, we're going to be building variations of the Arcues-City for Giratina, Palkia and Dialga, and then inside each Arceus-City will be large shrines to the other legendaries and mythics and such"

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>>9920803
... pew pew.
>A crude drawing of a Dusknoir is made on the ground.
>Rolling for if its even recognizable

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>>9920829
How noble, Oathkeeper.
>>9920900
Well, I try to be more active now.
>>9920909
>Squint.
>Nope.
You wish for art supplies?

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>>9920653
That's a really, really, really hard question to answer, Mr. Sun... I guess all the people I get to see and talk to? I mean... when in the ocean, I had a couple Popplio and other Brionnes and some Primarina I could talk to, but they weren't very fun to be around, and... well, nobody else wanted to talk, they were too busy trying to do things, and a few were even scared of me... but here on land, there's so many more people who I can talk to, and on top of that, there's all of you!

>>9920740
All sorts of stuff! Back in the ocean, we had fish and seaweed and that's it, but up here, there's so much more! Fruit, candy, Pokebeans, you name it! And there's also this thing called a malasada that... well, I've never tried it, but it smells delicious!

...Uhm, as for restaurants, there's the Malasada shop, there's a cafe in the Pokemon Center, and there's this place called the Battle Buffet... I uh, I haven't been to any of them because I don't have any money, but...

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>>9920816
"Sort of. Do you need me to carry you?"
>Tobias doesn't wait for an answer, sweeping Alain off his feet and heading toward the gym.

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>>9920950
>The puffy little hand comes to his face for a facepalm.
>He tries again, drawing a Pokeball this time - once he's drawn the Pokeball he brings his little arms down, swiping an X through the ball.

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>>9920963
Wait um... They were scared of you?

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PAR how do I marry a sword?

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>Walker: be alive

>>9920381
"How are you liking the city?"

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>>9920963
Woah!, Malasadas?
Now I have to go to Arora!

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>>9920950
"So I can see, so uh, if you don't mind me asking, how exactly did I get let out of the Distortion World?"

>>9921041
"...Right about that, I recently caught him and he's apparently not too happy about it, but, he's a really rare pokemon, and according to someone who had one with them before, some unsavory folks will torture them to get them to evolve, so I'd rather avoid that"

>>9921060
You gotta put a ring on it.

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>>9920983
"Oof. Alright, let's do this. Doubles battle it is."
>Let's go.
>I'm doing the battle since you can't co op doubles on Showdown
>http://play.pokemonshowdown.com/battle-gen7doublescustomgame-591296095

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>>9921083
>"It's quite different than I'm used to but there is a certain charm to it."
>"Your discussion with your boss is today correct?"

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>>9921083
It's big! And shiny!

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>>9921059
Uh-huh! I think it's like... something along the lines of them thinking I'd eat them or something. But that's silly, why would I eat a magikarp?

>>9921111
>Nice quads
Aurora? No, no, I'm in Alola, you silly fox!