ITT: Pokemon are real (An RP thread.) What do you want to d

>>9717732
nah

>>9717703
Name 3 pokemon that you would make out with, and why.

>>9717732
end it

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(Fuck me, I did it again)
>>9717712
>It was a week into the current year
>Walker looks distraught, worried about something
>He is an adoption center near Castelia
>Walker: "I need a Dark type. Any. I need to >A few conversations and papers signed, Walker walks out with a then level 30 Absol
>Walker: "Look to me... good. I need you to block out THEM from seeing me. That's all I need, please"

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>>9717661
...
>She breathes deeply, in and out
T-this is weird...

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>>9717642
It'll be fiiiiiine. Maybe, hopefully, heh.
>The dragon slows down as he comes into Ecruteak.
Of course you are. Are you getting doubts this far into this?

>>9717761
Garchomp because it's a big hot shark, Banette because because goopy soul tongue and the fun things that come after, aaand Mewtwo. All of 'em.

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>>9717805
"Only because of lack of practice"
"Try to get close?"

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>>9717796
>As the memory ends Valence blinks a few times
>"Who did you need Huxley to block out?"

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>>9717959
...
>Move forward
>About an inch, at most

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>>9717974
"A threat that ended being imaginary, all caused by an event the New Year"
"Those were some awful months"

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>>9717822
>Sun shakes his head slowly.
No, I'm just kinda worried?
I heard that they do a judging thing or whatever...
>He pauses, silent for a for moments as he looks over the city.
I think I have to buy it at the tower. Hey, how cool would it look if you wrapped around it?

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>>9718027
>Don't move an inch
"Tell me if this makes you too uncomfortable"

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>>9718041
>"I see. Was there anything else you'd like me to do?"

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>>9718070
You'll be fine, just breathe.
>He looks at the tower.
Ehh... Pretty cool. You think they'd judge you better if I did that or something?

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>>9718128
...I...uh...
I'm... trying to relax...
>Another half inch

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>>9718148
"Well, I think you passed the test"
"But lets see if you can pick the memory of the New Year event"

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>>9718238
>"Okay"
>He repeats the same process as before

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>>9718231
>About three bodies left of distance
"Now, try faster"

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>>9718288
>Dubs
>The memory is as clear as a day
>A memory of a day that feels like it never happened
>A cheap apartment in Castelia
>There's a worried Stoutland and a Kadabra
>The Kadabra is clutching his head in pain
>Kadabra?: "The voices...the voices...shut them off..."
>You don't see any humans anywhere

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>>9718376
>"That memory was... interesting. What was wrong with the Kadabra? It seemed like they were reading too many minds at once but didn't know how to stop it."

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>>9718151
Hmmm... I don't think they would...
I don't think you'll fit...
Meet you at the top, Fug!
>The young champ hops off of Rayquaza, looking back over his shoulder and waving. Acquiring the feather is simple - talk to the monk, transfer the 55,404,500,000, done.
>Getting past the monk is harder. A foreigner with no badges, going to see Ho-Oh? Absurd. The conversation is long, the monk prying for details on his journey as a trainer, questioning his every motive and decision. For better or for worse there are some things he skips over, details skimmed or events left out entirely.
>After what feels like an eternity the monk let's him through, warning that Ho-Oh appears for few.
>The tower and its path are beautiful, but Sun spends little time looking around, speeding to the top as quickly as he can.
Fug!! Fug!!! I made it!

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>>9717732
I... am not certain, however, there are many things I am curious to explore

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>>9718597
Did you rest well? The couch is not the most comfortable of places to sleep.

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>>9718518
"I was that Kadabra"
"A day that never existed, a day with no humans and no clear perpetrator"
"That left me with many questions, little answers and a constant worry if there was a nefarious cabal ready to do it again"
"These days are long post now, and you definitely passed the test"

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>>9718585
>Fug is waiting for him at the top.
Hey, hey! Nice work, kiddo. You wanna get this party started? I haven't seen Ho-Oh in like... Eight... Ten years?

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>>9718666
>Sun stares at the feather for a few seconds
... they didn't say how to summon Ho-Oh.
Do I just...
>He bats at the Clear Bell tied around his neck, producing a loud, clear, ringing.

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>>9718634
I did, thank you.
>Mewtwo groans, stretching

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>>9718905
>The mystical bird appears in a flash of fire, golden light being cast across Johto and Kanto.
Hello again, Lyra-k-- My apologies, you are? A friend?

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>>9718905
Do you need help?
>>9719127
Neeeeeeever mind. Yo, dude.

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>>9718634
Hey, babe. My fuckin' head hurts.
>>9719094
>Squint.
When'd we get a cat?

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>>9719127
Um... I'm Sun and I don't know Lyra but... I wanna be a friend! Your friend!

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>>9718641
>He cocks his head to one side
>"Wait you're telling me you got turned into a pokemon?"
>"How did you turn back into a human?"

>>9717732
If Pokemon are real, does that mean people can survive being blasted into the sky with no lasting injuries?

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>>9719141
A pleasure to see you again, you have been well?

>>9719223
I see! I will be happy to come with you Champion-san, But you will need to give me a battle.
It is part of the tradition. Come, Champion-san.

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>>9719094
Do you wish to eat? I have food in the kitchen. It is... Mostly fruit.
>>9719187
Say hello to Mewtwo. She arrived last night. Apparently Astra believed we were going to murder her.
Also, you drank too much. Moderation is the key, dear. Would you like me to kiss the pain away?

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>>9719258
"I don't really understand myself"
"But what little I found by the few that acknowledged the event, that day never actually happened"
"And yet, the after effects were very real"

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>>9719419
>"Huh, whoever caused the event must have had a lot of power."
>"So since I passed your test where do we go from here?"

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>>9719305
Okay! I can do that!
>An Ultra Ball is removed from his belt, a Heliolisk bursting forth in a flash of light.
Soleil! Thunder!
>The lizard's frills flare out, a bolt of Thunder being called down from the sky.
>Misses on 7 or higher, causes paralysis on 2 or lower.

>>9719545
(Whoops, forgot the calc)
252 SpA Life Orb Heliolisk Thunder vs. 248 HP / 52 SpD Ho-Oh: 276-328 (66.5 - 79%) -- guaranteed 2HKO

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>>9719187
>>9719327
Yes, I would, fruit is quite tasty, though I have found I prefer pastries.
Also, hello, you are the fairy woman, correct?

>>9717732
I'm a cleaner. That IS my life.

...Retiring to the tropics wouldn't be so bad, if I make it there.

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>>9719545
>>9719571
>The bird reels from the hit.
Well, you're much stronger than the past challengers were, Champion-san.
>Sacred Fire.
208+ Atk Ho-Oh Sacred Fire vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Dry Skin Heliolisk: 366-432 (138.1 - 163%) -- guaranteed OHKO

>>9719626
A 'cleaner' or a cleaner?

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>>9719530
"I'm pretty sure nothing short of divine intervention caused it, and unmade it"
>Walker searches into his coat, pulling out an Ultra Ball
"Let's make this official, then we go looking for an hotel"
"If you want".

>>9719626
(Can you just say what plot this is for. Faceless anons forwarding plot is getting confusing.)

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>>9719655
>Through a feat of both luck and acrobatics the lizard manages to just barely dodge the attack. It hisses in response.
Awwww, thanks! I haven't been Champion long, I'm glad I'm not disappointing!
Soleil, again!
>Thunder, same rules.

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>>9719731
>The bird collapses to the ground.
>You can hear a few of the monks and kabuki dancers make negative comments on the battle.
>Ho-oh rises slowly.
You have proven yourself worthy.
>Sun gains 1x Sacred Ash.
I will go with you.

>>9719662
Depends on who or what's asking.
>>9719707
(no plot friend!)

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>Alolan rooftops,
>Watching as the crowds mill by,
>Looking for nothing.
>>9719683
( OOC, is it cool if I reintroduce this character? )

>>9719791
>(no plot friend!)
>Squint.
(You better not be lyin.)

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>>9719683
>He looks at the ball and then back to the human
>"Sure but I just realized I never asked what your name was."

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>>9719841
"I could swear I told you before. Agent Eugene Walker, International Police, Ultra Beast Taskforce"

>>9719796
(It's cool)

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>>9719862
>"It's possible you did, I can be forgetful at times."
>"Well Eugene I would be happy to join your team."

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>>9719862
>The frog leaps down from his perch,
>Hope's embers alight,
>Off to see an old comrade.

"I hope I'm not crashing things,"
"But it's good to see,"
"A familiar face out here."

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>>9719775
Yes! Thank you, Ho-Oh!
>Sun barely resists the urge to hug the bird, instead opting to rock back and forth on his heels, beaming up at Ho-Oh.
Do you want a ball or do you just wanna follow around outside of it? I have a bunch of different Pokeballs to choose from if you want a ball!

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>>9719931
I will follow without a pokeball.
>The bird rises.
Where shall we go?

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>>9719896
"Well then, touch this Ultra Ball"
"I don't think the boss would accept anything not officially registered"

>>9719917
"Kanabo, my dear friend"
"Likewise, I hope Alola has been treating you well?"

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>Anabel is back at her villa taking notes down.
>Post in the meantime.
Has anyone heard from the detective today?

>>9719998
Yeah he posted a super hot video of torture porn
my dick never felt better

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>>9719989
>He nods before pressing the button on the Ultra Ball with his tail and is enveloped by a burst of white light and is transferred into the ball

>>9719998
>roll to splat goo on

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>>9719989
"Though the waters here are calm,"
"The people pleasant,"
"I yearn for a cause again."
>>9719998
Anabel? You live?
My heart soars among the stars,
To know you're with us.

>>9720023
That was evidence, you vile swine.
The last man to make such things that I know of was slain for doing so.

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>>9719998
He seems to have disappeared, lady.

>>9720044
>Pop open the ball again, and let Valence out
Now, three more.

>>9720053
"I came here with a cause to offer"
"Anabel recently came back, and I got promoted into her now back in action Ultra Beast Taskforce"
"For that, I was tasked with building a full team"

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>>9719974
Um... I was gonna see about giving Gold the leftover money from the feather but.... I don't know where he is...
>The corners of his mouth twitch, the beginnings of a frown.
We can go back to Annie's house, I can't wait to see how surprised she is!
>His body is practically shaking with how excited he is.

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>>9720023
Go to bed or I'm calling the police.
Wait, I'm the police.
Haha. I'm so funny.
>>9720052
>Anabel is goo'd.
>She wipes her notepad off and keeps working.
>>9720053
Nope, they can't kill me that easily. I take it you've been... Well?
>>9720108
That's concerning.

>>9720107
Aw shit
There a video of that as well?
My dick needs a stroking

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>>9720120
>The bird nods.
I would offer a ride but the last human I did that to I ended up burning. Do you have a method?
>The birb squints at Sun's shaking.
Are you ill?

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>>9720136
>A sniper aims through the window
>Steady...
>Aim...
>FIRE

>>9720136
Hey uh, what's it take to get into the I.P? I'm kinda out of a job right now and joining the police seems like something that would pay the bills and keep me busy.

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>>9720172
>A tungsten rod falls from the sky and pierces through the anon's head
NEXT TIME IT COMES AT RELATIVISTIC SPEEDS
SCIENCE

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>>9720108
"Sir, I volunteer!"
"I am honored to accept,"
"To fight by your side."
>>9720136
I had thought you gone.
I did not take such news well,
If I may be blunt.

I thought for a time,
Three Trainers I had outlived.
Now, I join Walker.

Welcome back, I'm glad to say,
I hope you are well,
My comrade and friend.

>>9720172
( le random "lol i kil u" guns are foreboden)

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>>9720108
>Valence shakes his head
>"That felt weirder than I thought it would."
>"Who's the frog?"

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>>9717732
Obviously to have the greatest museum in the world. Beyond that, I'm not really sure. Been feeling somewhat odd about things lately. Once you reach a certain age you look back and begin questioning your choices. "What would my loved ones say about this", "am I really happy", "did I remember to burn all those bodies"....

You know. Just little things.

>>9720197
>inb4 metagame

>>9720248
(what?)

>>9720213
>>9720214
>not reading the filename to begin with
C'mon guys it was an obvious shitpost from just that alone

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>>9720136
Distressing, especially knowing I couldn't do anything about it.

>>9720214
>Walker seems visibly relieved
"To be honest, knowing your history I thought you went into retirement. Or worse"
>Walker scans Kanabo with the dex
>Mostly looking for the current registration info

>>9720215
"He is a friend, and a fighter for justice"
"I will try to keep you out of the ball as often as needed"

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>>9720172
...Who's shooting bbs at my window?
>>9720197
You'll need to go through significant background checks and sign into being psychically scanned.
Can you do this?
>>9720214
Please keep Walker safe. I need to talk to Nate about something for him.
>>9720275
Everything should be fine. I'll look into it if he goes silent for too long.

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>>9720220
>Kyogre emerges from the water.
>Squint at the cock.
>The voice booms- Okay, actually, it doesn't.
>Kyogre's voice doesn't boom in the slightest, he sounds more like someone who really needs to sleep.
Curator Alcock.

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>>9720156
>A Masterball is plucked from Sun's belt. From it, the one and only Nebby. The cat makes sure to put on a show - rather than the normal growl and go used for teleportation he stretches out, fluffs out his mane, triggers his radiant form and.... Roars. It's a loud, resonating bellow, heard all throughout Ecruteak and perhaps further. With one glance back at the two Nebby leaps through the portal.
I'm okay, just excited! I've been waiting a long time to get to meet you! C'mon, let's go!
>Stepping through the portal deposits Sun right in front of Anabel's villa
>>9720281
Annie!!
Aaaaaaannie!!

>>9720281
Background checks and psychic scans? That's fine by me, my last boss had to let me go during some cutbacks, so I haven't even been fired, squeaky clean record, where do I go?

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>>9720316
...Magic.
>>9720281
Are you this child's mother?

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>>9720301
>Cock: Fug internally
>to his credit, his near permanent scowl doesn't waver, even in the face of a giant floating whale demigod
>Externally he appears as irritable and smug as ever
>Internally he's doing the math on how fast he can sink the ship and haul ass to Orre if he had to
>"I swear to every god if I get smited after I resolve to be LESS evil..."
Yes. Can I help you?

>>9720275
>Registration: none.
>Previous owner: deceased.
>Odd; five months ago?
"These concerns, I understand."
"They're not without cause."
"Now, though, we need not worry."
>>9720281
Affirmative, ma'am.
I will guard him with my life,
Should it come to that.

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>>9720391
>Those within the thread,
>I forgot my image, thus:
>Take a drink, and now.

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>>9720384
My friend has told me you are...
>The whale interrupts his sentence with a yawn.
...Turning a new fin?

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>>9720384
"Heh, something the matter boss?"

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>>9720281
Understood, lady.

>>9720391
>>9720429
>Mumbling to himself: "good"
"Are you sure you want to be registered again?"

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>>9720483
"Your discretion, here, I trust."
"Whatever your call,"
"I will abide, and accept."

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>>9720275
>"A friend of yours is a friend of mine."
>Valence turns to the Greninja and smiles
>>9720391
"Hello my name is Valence, it's nice to meet a friend of Eugene's"

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>>9720429
>Fug internally again
>Either you lie, say you're going straight all the way, and get smited for lying, or you're honest, say you're staying outside the law but with a stricter code of ethics and get smited for wasting his time
>This is a fantastic situation to be in
>Limitless options, all of them resulting in being turned into canned tuna
Perhaps. Bit less pillage and plunder, a bit more professional work of the Hessian nature. As of late the old murdering and looting routine has lost some of it's charm. Perhaps it's time to just go mercenary, get my artifacts the "right" way. Or it could just be my age talking. Never really know, do you?

>>9720449
There is a giant talking whale asking about my current morality. I advise taking cover.

>On that note, let's check the Dimmer Switch of Evil
>Current Moral Shift Status:
>Morally Grey Professional: 3 Points
>Mustache Twirlingly Evil Murderhobo: 1 Point
>Cock Status: Gradually becoming less of a prick

(Haha i think i need a break sorry.)

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>>9720538
>Walker searches again in his coat
>He was not expecting to this twice in one day
>A second Ultra Ball is fetched, and is given to Kanabo
"Well, there goes nothing"

>>9720552
"We fought in some odd scenarios, and now they are just going to get more outlandish"

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>>9720577
"Heh heh, I say, bring it on"

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>>9720577
Hm... I suppose if I can offer a little advice I'm going to suggest you become more grounded before something bad happens.
>>9720662
Hello.

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>>9720552
"I am Kanabo, Valence."
"It's a privilege."
"Welcome to the IP, friend."

>>9720620
>Froggo taps the ball.
>There is no hesitation,
>as he's drawn right in.

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>>9720338
I think Anabel fell asleep. I can give you a scan through with Kyurem if you reaaally wanna join?
Just gonna let you know any psychics aren't gonna be able to block him from finding stuff.

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>>9720606
(I can understand that. Stay safe, anon.)
>>9720360
I guess Annie's busy, c'mon, I'll show you the back!
>Sun leads the way to a sandy stretch near the ledges. Several palm trees and one or two umbrellas are lying around.
I think you could probably nest on the ledges or something if you want? I'm not sure how high the ceiling is in Annie's villa, sorry!

>>9720725
Woah, I've got nothing to hide that I can think of, really, uh, I feel kinda special for being looked at by a legendary, where do I go to get this done?

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>>9720684
>Registration complete
>Quickly pop open the ball again
"Back in action"

>>9720606
(See you soon)

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>>9720726
This is a beautiful nesting place. If you don't mind I feel I need a bit of time and time to rest.
>The birb gets to making his nest.
Thank you, for this.

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>>9720750
Does the regional office in Unova work for you?

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>>9720680
I've been forced to reevaluate my entire understanding of ethics and morality in the span of two months, so you'll have to pardon me if I'm more than a tad disjointed at the moment. Balancing existing reputation and obligation with my new-found conscience has proven to be... somewhat frustrating. I'm sure it's been obvious from my appearance.
>It has not
>he always looks mad and tired
>Because he always is mad and tired
>Being madder and tireder didn't have much effect on his appearance
At the very least I've got some ground rules established for myself now.

>>9720662
...I am fairly certain that would kill us all.

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>>9720787
Yes actually, I uh, guess I'll be on my way now!
>and so our average joe enters the realm of images and travels to Castella from Driftveil

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>>9720680
"Hello, heh"
"I say I'm pretty well grounded, heh heh"

>>9720816
"Heh, that would be bad"

Hello /par, haven't posted in here in a while because of business.
Any of you know what happened to that anon that claimed to have moved to the Sinnoh Underground?

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>>9720755
"Back in action, yes."
"It has been too long for me,"
"Since I've used my skills."

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>>9720821
Alright, look for the guy in the blue in the lobby.

>>9720884
Slateportfag here, I think he dropped off the grid, but I dunno.
( OOC, his player left PAR. )

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>>9720816
I trust you'll stay grounded before something comes to ground you.
I hope you understand my implication. If you impress me I may have something for you.
Do take care.

>>9720845
You as well, even with the typing.

>Kyogre sinks back into the sea.

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>>9720845
I strongly advise finding something of sufficient size to stand behind. The only person who could've done substantial harm to him is the Captain. Unless you're a Magnezone in a very elaborate disguise.

>>9720975
>Ah.
>Death threats.
>Lovely.
>Should've just been a damn dictionary editor or something...
...Well. That was delightfully cryptic. Always a sign you're in for substantial quality of life improvements when your existential crisis is punctuated by death threats from a god.

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>>9720919
"And I have been honing mine, and my team so far"
"Nate wants it in peak condition, and there's still the search for two more members"
"We shall rest now, for tomorrow we go in search of Gooey"

>>9720951
Well, that is distressing, I will now have to do actual field work.
Thanks, anyway.

(Yeah, I thought so)

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>>9720935
(OOC this guy had certain memories tampered with irreversibly, is this okay?)
>The man walks in, a Herdier at his side
Hi, you the right guy?

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>>9720759
You're welcome Ho-Oh, anything for a friend!
Good night!
>Sun waves a goodbye and heads back inside, flopping onto the couch and pulling out his phone

So... What's everyone else up to?

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>>9720975
"Heh heh... what?"

>>9721089
"Uh"
"That was not good"

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>>9721208
(Yeah, that's gonna be essentially a no-sell to Nate, though. Or at least he's going to want to look into why the memories were messed with.)
Yep, yep. You ready?
>B-Kyurem is sent out.

>>9721210
Gotta interview some weird guy. He looks kinda scrawny...

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>>9721253
...If I understand correctly, my options are apparently cease my emotional crisis, totally dismantle my entire personality, and become a some kind of Teutonic servant, or be turned into salad. Lovely. Just lovely. If I die, there's a key tapped under the bottom drawer on the left side of the desk in my office, see that it gets to a Miss Annabel, will you?

>>9721333
>tripfail
>metagameguy nukes the IP

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>>9721333
(The guy has had like, the past month of time erased and re-written, I'm not sure if that would be detectable or what, unlike just being erased, what do the GMs think?)
As ready as I'll ever be.
>The man takes a deep breath, and hopes they don't mind the weird things he's gotten off to

>>9721386
>Specifically ask the GMs how to be as not-metagamey as possible
>Get called out on it anyways
Ok.

>>9721402
>the past month of time erased and re-written
(Unless this is a leggo tier psychic I think there would be detectable inconsistencies.)
>>9721416
(Just keep replying to the shitposters, thanks, I hope your plot dies, asshole.)

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>>9721385
"Eeeehhh.... Lets go inland?"
"Got it boss, eh"

>>9721386
(I'm overseeing this plot goes off well)

>>9721402
(That many memories getting rewritten is bound to leave a mark, or something not matching correctly)

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>>9721333
But Nate, aren't you kinda scrawny too...?
Anyway um... What's weird about him?
>>9721402
(If this were Zekrom doing the reading I would have the fact that stuff was tampered with be incredibly obvious. He wouldn't be able to recover the memories, but he would know that the stuff was replaced.)

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>>9721480
Yes. Inland. Very, very, very inland. Far away from lakes, ponds, rivers, or puddles of substantial size. With that in mind, it may be hazardous to our health to go through with the Unova heist. As a rule, I try to avoid the attention of any beings capable of turning Orre into a giant quicksand pit.

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>>9721150
>"I'm guessing Gooey is another friend of yours?"
>>9720684
"I'm excited to be apart of something, I just hope I don't mess up anything important."

>>9721448
>Why don't we have plot
>Plot starts
>I don't like this plot fuck you and your mother
>Plot dies
>Why don't we have plot
Every time.

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>>9721448
>>9721480
>>9721492
(I was going to say that he found something inconsistent and found it weird.)
>>9721402
>Kyurem makes a disgusted face at the strange lewd and then a few inconsistencies are found.
>Holes, gaps, unnatrual with no drugs or anything involved.
>Nate takes this down in a notebook.
>Anything else important you can post, I don't know, I feel like I'm just fucking everything up here and should go away or something, rip.

>>9721492
I dunno, just kinda... Jerry.

>>9721603
(Am I fucking up your plot...? You really shouldn't have someone try to infiltrate the IP. That'd be like putting a sleeper agent in Cipher or Catalyst.)

>>9721632
kys

>>9721632
fucking kys

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>>9721568
"Ehhhhhhh... ugh"
"This is going to suck, eh"

>>9721632
(That was not the plot maker in question)
(Though it does mess up his plot a bit, it's nothing he can't recover from)

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>>9721632
(You're fine dude, that last guy wasn't even me)
>It's like this guy has been living in the Matrix for the past month, and there's been a few glitches
>Sometimes five seconds loops for an hour, but those are the most severe, mostly it is minor things like walls changing color slightly when the man looks back at them
>It's almost like someone worked very hard to make him forget something
>It's also very clear he doesn't know a damn thing about it
So... Am I good to go now?

>>9721632
get the fuck out dont come back

>>9721710
>>9721674
>>9721693
Take your own advice shitheel

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>>9721632
>You're fine dude
>What you're doing is pretty much what would've happened if he tried to join Catalyst.
>Man, I'm uh
>Having a really hard time not responding to those shitposters
>You down for friendly OOC banter?
Jerry...? Is that um... Normal? Boring...?

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>>9721576
"You will not 'mess up'."
"Of this, I am confident."
"For now, though, we rest."

> 3 shitter anonposts, exactly 1 min - 1 min 5 sec apart
> thinking.png

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>>9721696
(Alright.)

>>9721700
(I'm honestly probably just going to go back t lurking after this, sorry.)
>He makes a few more notes.
Yep, we'll be in touch if we can find you a position.
>Sorry Jerry, no callback for you.

>>9721746
>Yeah, uh, how are you, man?
Y'know like... Jerry. It's like... You see someone and they're inherently Jerry.

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>>9721696
>exhausted sigh
Yes. Yes it is. Best case scenario is I manage to randomly discover what an ancient whale's idea of a grounded personality is, appease it, then get forced to some horrifically suicidal Holy Grail quest like smashing the Red Orb, sealing Rayquaza, or something equally godsawful that will result in a horrific death.

Essentially a normal day for us, all things being equal.

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>>9721576
"Gooey is another member of the IP, we lost contact with her near the same time as Kanabo here"
"I'm sure you will do well, your abilities are great and Huxley thinks you're safe"

>>9721753
>Walking down Hau'oli
>Find an hotel
>One far more comfortable that the cheap motel during the Anabel disappearance
>All thanks to the promotion
"Here"

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>>9721773
Thank you for your time!
>he leaves
>thank fuck it's not any worse than failing to get a job

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>>9721804
"Heh, but with less loot for us"
"Lets get this ship to Unova, heh, then we go in hiding"
"Or maybe not, get Kyogre to smash through all these humans"

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>>9721773
>I'm alright man
>Cat thinks that sitting on the taxidermy is fun so like
>Gotta fucking fetch him every two minutes
>Got anything going on?
Just.... Jerry? Huh... So... Exceptionally Jerry? More Jerry than should be allowed?

>>9721773
leave

>>9721773
fuck off

>>9721773
bite a bullet

The samefag levels are off the charts

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>Back into the fray, this time with updated notes.
>Use a revive on the doggo.
>7 revives left.
"Gotta get my fucking pokegear back."
>Back into town.
>Rolling.

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>>9721849
I'd rather avoid Kyogre entirely until I can figure out what it wants.
>...
>Cockweed: Be thinking
>Current plans: All involve some kind of crime, have to be mothballed
>Gask: Only became slightly loyal after a period of extended violence, which you apparently can no longer have
>Kyogre: Has some mysterious friend, probably wants to test your pliability, will use you as a meat shield or to do something horribly suicidal
>You: Really miss Ty right now
Ahem. Well. This is fantastic.

I'm only saying this because you've proven to be... personable. To me. The situation is clearly getting bleak fast. Apparently I'm fated to become either Odysseus or ambergris. If you wanted to take your companion and abscond, this would most certainly be the best time.

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>>9721974
>4.
"Museum is empty. Better watch my back."
>Head off to the back room.
>Rolling.

>░██████╗░██████╗░░░░░██╗███████╗░░░░░█████╗░░░░░███████╗░█████╗░░██████╗░░██████╗░░██████╗░████████╗
>██╔═══██╗██╔══██╗░░░░██║██╔════╝░░░░██╔══██╗░░░░██╔════╝██╔══██╗██╔════╝░██╔════╝░██╔═══██╗╚══██╔══╝
>██║░░░██║██████╔╝░░░░██║███████╗░░░░███████║░░░░█████╗░░███████║██║░░███╗██║░░███╗██║░░░██║░░░██║░░░
>██║░░░██║██╔═══╝░░░░░██║╚════██║░░░░██╔══██║░░░░██╔══╝░░██╔══██║██║░░░██║██║░░░██║██║░░░██║░░░██║░░░
>╚██████╔╝██║░░░░░░░░░██║███████║░░░░██║░░██║░░░░██║░░░░░██║░░██║╚██████╔╝╚██████╔╝╚██████╔╝░░░██║░░░
>░╚═════╝░╚═╝░░░░░░░░░╚═╝╚══════╝░░░░╚═╝░░╚═╝░░░░╚═╝░░░░░╚═╝░░╚═╝░╚═════╝░░╚═════╝░░╚═════╝░░░░╚═╝░

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>>9722060
>0.
>Well, shit.
>Turn it on, working perfectly.
Hello? Sorry for the silence. Posting is pretty spotty out here, far away from the radio towers.

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>>9722119
Holy shit, I thought you died. How's it coming along?

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>>9721985
"Heh heh, only if Kyogre comes back to destroy us, boss"
"Which is not today, eh"

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>>9722119
Well.... How goes the case?
>>9722135
Holy shit it's Des. How's it going?

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>>9722119
Oh gods, thought you died.

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>>9722140
No, I suppose it isn't. Probably. We've still got half the money in Almia sitting in the hold from the run gem we sold and took back a dozen times. Good call on that, by the way. Shouldn't be too hard to lay low for a while.

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>>9722119
Bork. Didn't you die? Bork.

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>>9722135
>>9722164
Really well, I need to put some notes here, check the last reply of this post.
>>9722165
>>9722218
Nearly did.
>>9722119
(Just going to give a reminder OOC. Anything in quotes should be unknown to thread.)
Town isn't as empty as the precinct made it sound. There's someone skulking around with a Marowak.
Haven't found the other missing people. Assuming they're dead at this rate. What else? Car's dead and I have finite supplies, turned into a game of beat the clock.
Need to get back to investigating.
>Searching the back room.
>Rolling.

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>>9722164
Not dead, yet. Been working on saving up some cash. You?
>>9722255
Fuck me. That's some shit.

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>>9722255
>55
>YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.
>Enemy Action: +1 to knowing where the copper is.
>Rolling for Other Things.

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>>9722277
Not much. Pissed off some guy in Alola earlier today, said he's gonna kick my smug face in if we ever meet.
Guy was trying to move into the Ruins.
>>9722255
>Hey, looks like that curse finally kicked in
What's up with your car?

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>>9722164
>>9722277
Looks like a family reunion in here.
Just saying, the offer to go for some drinks on my wallet still stands.

>>9722255
If I were in your place I'd start requesting reinforcements.

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>>9722255
>55
>Converted to a 5 because the hidden effect came into place.
Cleaned this place out too, fucking hell.
What the hell is with this place?
>Head on outside.
Next building is a school house. This is going to be fun.
>Rolling for investigation.
>>9722277
Sure is.
>>9722338
Put sugar in the gas tank. Stuck here.
>>9722351
Planning on that.

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>>9722326
>6.
"Very good. A gift from the second final sacrifice."
>>9722457
"And the serpent wavers his way into the wrong area."
"Yet the others need my help."
>Rolling.

>>9722489
GOO- oh wait, wrong one

>>9722541
Old model, but still goo. D.

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>>9722351
Hm... Get Desmond into a pair of skinny jeans and send me a picture. I might consider cutting work for that.
>>9722457
Well... Shit. How're you planning on leaving when the investigation's finished? Walking?

>>9722635
Is it the same quality goo? Or should I just hunt down the regular goo machine?

>>9722665
Different flavor and less output are things to be expected, quality depends on how well the machine has been serviced. Up to you but I'll stick with the purple goo.

>>9722693
Huh. Well, any port in a storm, but I would prefer the purple flavor. Oh well.

>roll to harvest some retro goo

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>>9722338
What the fuck?
He some kind of special ed kid?
>>9722661
Hilbert, for the love of god.

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>>9722661
Next time I'm in Unova, which doesn't seem it will be any time soon.
Or you come here to Alola.
That's a promise.

>>9722457
I'm going to guess no public transportation in the area.

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>>9722195
"Heh, that was a great plan"
"Lay down, go inland, fight humans for money is not that what they do?"

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>>9722457
>7.
They're really trying to hide something.
All the desks have been moved into the corners...
Not looking in the right areas?
>Rolling for search.
>>9722661
Going to have to call someone in.
>>9722769
Yep. Train line to Goldenrod runs a few miles north if I really need to hoof it.

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>>9722768
Yeah I don't know. He said "Fuck you" and didn't like my answer.
Yeeeeees, Des?
>>9722769
Dude did you not just see me saying there was a fucker in Alola looking to kick my face in?
How stupid would I have to be to fucking...
Sorry Seb, looks like our drinks and those pics will have to wait for your next trip to Unova.
>>9722832
Place sounds pretty spooky. Calling dibs on the movie rights.

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>>9722798
Mm. Might be able to find a few decent fights in town. Nothing heinous enough to get us smitied by our new friend but decent for keeping in practice.

I suppose I'll finish up my paperwork downstairs and go to sleep. Goodnight to you.

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>>9722832
That really doesn't sound like a place to be alone.

>>9722895
Hah, like if these threats had any force behind.
Your loss.

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>>9722920
"Heh, that's more like it"
"Goodnight boss"
>Time to find a goo pool to sleep in

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>>9722936
Consider: he knows my face. I don't know his. If I knew that yeah maybe I might go over there and risk my butt. But I don't, so Hilbert's sweet ass is gonna stay in this chair and laugh at that idiot online for now.

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>>9722832
>2.
Yet another basement.
Into yonder depths I fucking go.
>Down the staircase.
>>9722895
I'll be happy to sell them to you. My kingdom for a coke.
>>9722936
It really isn't.

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>>9723178
You make it out of there and I'll gladly deliver.
Don't fall down the stairs.

goo

Does anyone know where I can get a garchomp?

>>9723757
By raising a gibel

>>9723757
ebay

>>9723757
Tied to Bones' bed.

>>9724938
goo

>>9725567
GOOOO

...
Where can I get a pair of panties and stockings that fit a gengar?
The Banette convinced them.

>>9725713
Orre.

>>9725755
Where in Orre? And do they deliver?
I can't leave the manor for more than a day.
I promised them that.

>>9725792
Perverted ghosts, that's what. They deliver goo.

>>9725805
I need ghost underwear, though.
Do they make that?
... It's really weird asking these questions, now that I think about it.

>>9725820
Yes, probably, and yes it is.

>>9725822
Do they have a website or something?
...When you live with a bunch of ghosts, things don't seem as weird anymore.

>>9725847
Not that I know of, no.

>>9725852
Well, that's unfortunate.
Maybe make it myself?

Jirachi

I wish N would die of a heart attack

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Anon looking for a Garchomp here.
Is it true Jirachi can turn humans into pokemon?

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>>9723156
Well... damn. Fucked up if true.

>>9726405
Yes, if he is in a good mood.

t. someone that got turned into a pokemon in five different occasions

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>>9726572
Hypothetically.
Could I wish for Jirachi to turn a different human into a pokemon?

>>9726203
>Not death by hard gay pounding from gladi.
Try harder.

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>>9726610
Just temporarily.

>>9726610
Assuming you mean permanently? Yeah, he can, but I doubt he would unless the other guy was willing and he'd slept for a week

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>>9726725
I see.
>>9726735
>willing
...An all powerful wish granting god needs someone to be willing?

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Jirachi!

I wish >>9726203 would die of a「Sheer Heart Attack」

>>9726764
He's done it to unwilling people, but he isn't a fan of forcing people to be pokemon forever.

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>>9726610
>>9726764
Hey if you really want your wish, Deo is out right now, grab me some redlines and come to Birth Island and I'll let you do your wish.
>>9726770
(Plz.)
>Boom.

>>9726832
thank

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>>9726778
Alright.
>>9726832
Well, hell, alright. Be there in thirty or so.
>Pick up a 12 pack from the store.
>Rolling for travel time, last number x2

>>9726832
Yare yare daze

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>>9726832
Please stop letting weirdos onto the island. I'll be waiting for him to leave.

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>>9726992
So what are you gonna do in the meantime?

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>>9726864
(it's been 8 min irl time and we're slow, I'll say your guy arrived.)
Helloooooooo.
What's up, what do you want?

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>>9727130
Would you care to actually do that battle?
>>9727140
If he asks for anything world ending please call me back and I will deal with him.

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>>9727179
Sure, I'm up for it.
Same place, I'm guessing?

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>>9727140
My neighbor, into a Garchomp. Level fifty.
Make it permanent.

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>>9727179
Noope.
>>9727206
Dang, that's pretty dark.
>Ding.
Yep, uh, there's a confused Garchomp now. I suggest getting on that.

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>>9727230
Thanks.
>Back home to get a Garchomp.

>>9727206
>confused, probably angry garchomp
dude I hope you're ready to get eaten alive.

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>>9727204
That would be correct.
>>9727230
At least you didn't fill lake verity with cereal this time.

>>9727263
You better fuck it!

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>>9727289
Alright, I'll meet you there.
>Grabbing his Pokeballs and a bottle of wine, Alain heads out.

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>>9727329
My apologies for fleeing our last battle. Your raw strength poured fear into my heart.

>>9727389
>touch tentacle

>>9727389
So, you've got your aura of death because you're a living virus right?
Couldn't you uh, give people vaccines?

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>>9727389
Is that sarcasm I'm hearing? You're so mean to me.
Bisharp and I will be over by the treeline. I left wine on a tree stump, if you want it.

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>>9727495
Please do not.
>>9727516
I'm not exactly sure I'm the sort of living virus that a vaccine would work with? When parts of me are broken off they retain the same effect they would while being connected.
>>9727543
Well I try my best. Are you getting me drunk before the battle?
Do you need a handicap that badly?
>There's a small chuckle as Deoxys comes into view.
Ready when you are.

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>>9727639
Oh? Are you really so much of a lightweight that a glass of wine will get you drunk?
Weeeak.
>Alain's entire team is level 85 aside from Charizard, which is level 100.
Alright, Bisharp? Let's go! Swords Dance!
>Bisharp's attack goes up two stages

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>>9727699
(I'm going to only have Deoxys switch forms at the beginning of a turn in a friendly battle. Life and death he'll cheat and switch forms as he needs.)
(You'd still calc an attack against him as whatever form he's in presently.)
Well I do not sample alcohol very frequently. Ever.
I'm not sure how alcohol would react with me...
>Attack form is assumed.
>Superpower!
>Are dubfails a miss or a crit in this new battle system?
>Inb4 7s
4 Atk Life Orb Deoxys-Attack Superpower vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Bisharp: 884-1045 (382.6 - 452.3%) -- guaranteed OHKO

>>9727778
>Deoxys almost quadsfailed and killed itself or something
(THE NUMBERS MASON, WHAT DO THEY MEAAAAN)

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>>9727778
(Alright, noted.)
(In the new system dubs and higher are crits if the move would have hit and fails if the move would have missed. Super Power has 100% accuracy so any gets period would be crits, but something like say... Dynamic Punch with 50% accuracy any dubs 5 or above would be considered a dubsfail.)
(I hope that's not too confusing or anything?)
I guess we might get to find out today.
>The KO'd Bisharp is recalled.
>Metagross is sent out.
Metagross, Meteor Mash!
>Misses on 9, raises attack one stage on 0 and 1.
252+ Atk Metagross Meteor Mash vs. -1 0 HP / 0 Def Deoxys-Attack: 571-673 (236.9 - 279.2%) -- guaranteed OHKO

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>>9727883
(That makes sense, thank you. I just wanted to double check. Want to avoid messing up calcs or posts.)
>Too slow, Deoxys is mash'd.
>He rises after a few moments, grumbling.
I really have lost my touch. That or everyone has gotten much too strong.

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Yo, bros.
Like, what's up?
>Zap rat: munch on leftover malasadas, contemplate waking up other housemates.

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>>9728003
(No problem. Ho-Oh and I kinda messed up a post last night, it happens.)
You aren't the first Legendary I've battled, remember?
>Metagross receives a pat on the back for a job well done before being returned to his ball
We can keep going if you want, or we can relax and drink.

>>9728046
Hey, I'm looking around Kalos for a Helioptile.
I think I remember someone saying they can be found on Route 9, so I'm having a look to see if I can find one.
>Rollan.

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>>9728046
I'm trying to think what Ho-Oh would want for breakfast!
I don't know if he actually eats or not, but it would be kinda rude to not offer at all!

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>>9728206
Good luck, bro. Helioptiles are cool.
>>9728228
I dunno, bro. Usually, I'd, like, offer malasadas 'cause that's my go-to, but I'm sure 'chu can think of something.

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>>9728046
Having a friendly battle. You?
>>9728189
(Alright, do tell me if I fuck up.)
Very true.
>There's a laugh from the pokemon.
Care to do the honors?
>The wine bottle is floated from the stump to Alain.
>>9728228
I'd suggest something with ancient Johto influences.
...Is it true Rayquaza deemed you worthy of the suit? I may visit you if this is true.

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>>9728046
>Nerd status: currently narcoing

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>Mole status: swimming laps in the closest beach.

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>>9728294
Chilling out, leftover malasadas for breakfast.
Might surf a bit, I dunno yet, y'know?
Like, it's weird being back in Alola after being gone for so long.

>Ray: Zip off to the beach.
>>9728334
>and see the sand shifting in a very not-Palossand way.
Hello?

>>9728206
>Helioptile has been found after the rper got distracted.
>John throws a Pokeball at it.

>>9728259
Thanks..uh...dude?
Sorry, got distracted looking around so much.
Have you by any chance seen a Solrock and Lunatone wandering around?

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>>9728259
I don't think Annie has any malasadas in here....
Maybe I'll see if Undella has any snack places,
it's a rich people town so it'd be kinda weird if it didn't!
>>9728294
Umm.... I'll see if Undella has a sushi place!
Yeah, Rayquaza let me have Sapphire's suit!
We went to the moon and stuff, it was really cool!

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>>9728347
>The shifting sand takes a turn
>It is getting close very fast
>Then it stops suddenly, up close
>Drilbe pops out the sand
Hello!

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>>9728294
>A knife is pulled from his pocket, a dull matte black to match the rest of his outfit. He flicks open a portion of the side, revealing a corkscrew.
Here...
>The tip of the corkscrew is jammed in.
We...
>He twirls the knife, spinning it until the screw is fully embedded in the cork.
Go!
>The cork comes out with a pull and a loud pop, the wine getting poured into two red party cups.
I don't really carry wine glasses with me everywhere, but I did snag some of those red plastic cups on the way here.

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>>9728360
Sorry, bro, haven't seen 'em.
They friends of 'chur's?
>>9728416
It's worth a shot, right?
>>9728419
Yo, Drilbs! What's up, bro? Like, how's the sand treatin' 'chu?

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>>9728347
Haha, do catch some waves in my stead.
>>9728416
Very interesting. Well... If there aren't many people around you I may visit soon.
>>9728575
>Deoxys pulls his cup over psychically.
>The strands of his left arm twist together, making a "mouth" directly into the core.
You're telling me a Kalosian doesn't keep wine glasses with himself wherever he goes? How out of character.
>There's a small chuckle as Deoxys takes a sip.

>>9728360
>Helioptile has been caught!
>John registers his new zaplizard as Barnard.
How did I not get one of these earlier, they're so cute.

>>9728595
Uh...maybe? I don't know.
All I know is that they're registered as my Pokemon on my PDA but I don't have them with me.
I'm worried they may have fallen into the hands of some bad people.

>Ian R. The failson: arrive at Slateport

>>9728360
I did encounter a pair of these in Johto some days ago. Odd guys.

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>>9728595
Swimming all day! From sun rise to sun set!
It is even better than in that dream.

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>>9728626
I don't carry around wine glasses and I'm terrible with fashion. I'm a shame to my country.
>He sips at his own wine, making a thoughtful "hm" as he eyes the mouth arm.
Am I going to have to wish you back home if you get drunk?

>>9728687
Johto?
Wow, well at least that means they're probably safe from the people I'm worried about.
I guess once I get myself a Gastly I'll probably head over and see if I can find them.
>John makes sure his scarf is tight enough that it won't fall off in the wind and heads back to Ambrette Town.

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>>9728626
Annie's inside and the neighbors are home, but I can always walk over to the nearby routes or something!
>>9728595
Okay!
I'm gonna go find those snacks!
>Rollin' for how long it takes Sun to find and buy sushi

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>>9728887
You really are. What kind of Kalosian are you?
>Hell, rolling for drunkness.
>Deo is a lightweight.
I don't think I'll get drunk, you have nothing to worry about.
>>9728966
That would be preferable. Do be careful.

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>>9729113
A fake one, apparently.
>An eyebrow is quirked at Deoxys, Alain smirking slightly.
You sure? Last time I took a Hoenn native drinking they got drunk as hell.

>>9728946
>John gets back to his hotel and puts on some music to relax to.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Qst-2zmM-k
Anyone know where I can get either a Sun Stone or a Gastly in Kalos, by the way?
I'm currently in Ambrette Town if it helps.

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>>9729113
I will, Deo!
>>9728966
>Dubs
>I'll cut the time down to three, so he's back now
>Sun heads out to the back of the villa with the box of sushi.
Hoooooo-ooooooh! I got food!

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>>9729221
Quite true. If I get too drunk and start asking for hugs I suggest running. Or getting Rayquaza.
>3
>I'm making Deo's max tolerance 5.
>He's already pretty drunk.

Well, I've never been to hell, I cannot say I'll be as drunk as hell.
>Take another sip.
>Attempt to sit down.
>Rolling to see if he can sit on the stump correctly.
>Odds and he fucking flops on it like a cat.

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>>9729320
>Curious birb noise.
What have you brought, Champion-san?

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>>9729335
I think I'll go for running. I don't have Rayquaza on speed dial.
>The eyebrow can't get much higher, but it's trying.
Hmmm.... Nope, you look drunk as hell to me.
... how's that virus of yours spread? If I get a gas mask am I okay to be around you?