ITT: Pokemon are real (An RP thread.) What's your opin

>>9659345
2nd best Sex toys

>>9659147
I kill to protect myself, like I said.
I would be much happier if I could live in a place with no Pokemon at all.

>>9659207
Except all those times when it did happen.
I'm not from Kanto, guess again fucker.

>>9659285
Fine, whatever.
Although with the amount of wild Pokemon attacks there needs to be something to protect people like me who want nothing to do with Pokemon. I'd go hunting if it wasn't illegal.

>>9659345
Trainers are deluded into thinking Pokemon are anything but wild animals.

>>9659345
rayquaza a best

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>>9659308
I'm pretty sure the term is "civilized".
>>9659317
In Kalos a human eater would get euthanized. But uh... Not sure what they would do to you.
>>9659336
There... Might be ways around it? Biggest problem is probably the "murder" part.

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>>9659317
Yes and I'm working on not.
Still hated by Smogon?

>>9659345
Depends on the relationship, if they're partners, or friends, or uh... lovers, then it's fine, or if the pokemon is down for that weird master shit then whatever, but forcing a pokemon to be a slave is asking for trouble.
Speaking of trouble, do you guys know how to deal with an angry ex-wife trying to invade your work? APPARENTLY the bitch put a tracker in my pokedex and now she's gotten a small mob of angry women outside.

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>>9659345
Good for business.
Usually.

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>>9659082
Oh, that's so cool! Geez, how come Nate gets three jobs?
>>9659399
Um.... Restraining order?

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>>9659345
Most of them are alright i think.

>>9659369
How do you plan on achieving that though?

>>9659382
yeah i guess so. that is a dumb rule.

>>9659399
Try fire!

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>>9659332
The shooter?
>>9659336
Well thank you!
>>9659382
What I'm hearing is, "O great Fug, yon to the skies go, please eat more of our humans."
>>9659395
Fuck you. I'll trash your stupid ass again if you talk to me like that.
>>9659399
Restraaaaaaaining order.
Or, y'know, ask the sky dragon to eat her.
>>9659432
Suuuuuuuuuuuun, I have come for yoooooooooooou.

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>>9659332
Yeah.
I probably should have been thinking of that before ranting and venting online, honestly.
But you don't think clearly when sleep deprived and stressed.
Hopefully, I didn't make an idiot of myself...

>>9659453
Yes, the shooter.

>>9659345
Need to be gassed
Death to all humans

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>>9659495
this tbqh

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>>9659395
(relevant to discussion)

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>>9659453
.... no, that's not what I said at all. How about "O fat Fug, yon to the Pokecenter go, please get hearing aids."

>>9659444
By moving somewhere away from Pokemon?
By scaring them all away?
Either of those or anything else, I really don't care how.

>>9659495
Fuck you especially.
I bet you're a fucking psychic type.

>>9659432
>>9659453
That reaaaally doesn't help me right now, we barred the doors but they've got a slugma.
>>9659444
Again, slugma, fire won't help much and Rena can't exactly...
Wait that's it, I'm gonna see if anyone else here has an Abra or something, I'm gonna teleport this bitch and her posse away!

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>>9659453
Um..... Please don't eat me? I'm really skinny and probably don't taste good!

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>>9659453
At least I'm personable enough to not attract ire.

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>>9659345
Eventually the word "trainer" will be phased out, and that will be good.

>>9659399
Call the police.

>>9659369
You're a fucking nutcase. I'd argue more but I have a plane to catch.
P.S. Psychics are great.

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>>9659484
I'm trying to lay low on the salt, hence why I haven't munched Deo lately.
>>9659539
Wow you are just bullying me. How will I ever keep up with the great Alain?
Delta Streaaaaaaam.
>>9659570
Kill herrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
>>9659599
>There's a Fug at the window.
>Clack clack, go the claws on the window.
Let me in, dude. I'm a fairy type.
>>9659608
At least I don't lose every battle I fight.

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>>9659632
Not even you can escape priority moves, Rayquaza.
Iiiiiiiice Shaaaaaaard.

>>9659617
Psychics share the title of worst type with ghosts.
I wouldn't be surprised if your psychic "friends" just brainwashed you, hell, maybe they just took over your mind completely and I'm actually just talking to a Pokemon.
Come near my home and you'll get shot, you've been warned.

Hey, uh, concerned friend here.
What do you do when your friend is getting way too reliant on a psychic type? I'm getting a bit fucking concerned.

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>>9659632
>Sun shifts nervously from foot to foot, looking from his phone to the window
"Um... I don't think you'll fit in Annie's house... Will you promise not to eat me if I come outside?"
>>9659778
Oh! Um... Talk to him! Or um, do a bunch of fun stuff without the Psychic Pokemon!

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>>9659720
Fug. Well I'm pretty sure I beat you and Steve that one time.
Better learn Quash then.
>>9659809
Swear on my heart and soul, let Gigi drag me to hell if I'm lying. I'm booooooooooored, Ruby's been doing contests or something AAAAGAAAAAAAAAIN.

>>9659809
The psychic is his boyfriend... I'm 99% sure I'd have to physically separate them if I wanted to get them away from each other.

>>9659632
I'd rather not, killing isn't our style, and thankfully, Rena has found a Kadabra!
>Rolling to teleport the tiny angry mob far the fuck away

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>>9659851
Tactical error on my part, come back to Viridian and we'll see who wins this time.
And with Quash you'd make Weavile go last and still get hit by Ice Shard. Since it's a move.

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>>9659927
Um... Maybe just... Ask if you two can hang together alone? One on one friend bonding?
>>9659851
"Okay..."
>There's several clicks as the Champion unlocks and opens the door, peeking out and looking around before slowly stepping outside.
"So um... what stuff do you wanna do? I can get pizza if you're hungry!"

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>>9659927
Got some advice.
Kill his boyfriend.
>>9659941
Everything okay there?
>>9660034
Yeah, yeah. I know I'll get outsped and all that crap. Don't you have gym battles to do?
>>9660079
>The dragon flicks his tongue out at Sun, the tongue forked down the middle and about 20x Sun's size.
>I guess I should probably say I play Raquaza being way longer, probably 70-80'. Hopefully that's cool?
Yeah, you don't taste good anyway. What aboooooout... Some of those alasada things? Mala... You know what I'm on about.

>>9660160
>probably 70-80'. Hopefully that's cool?
nice

>>9660160
Oh yeah just great, the Kadabra managed to get them a block away, really should have specified where we wanted them to go, we're trying this again.
Sorry Luminose, have fun with my ex!
>Rollan

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>>9659345
Other than my first trainer I think they're fine for the most part, some are good some are bad but the same can be said for Pokemon as well.

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>70-80'? Nice. Yeah, we don't mind if people take size liberties, since Pokemon makes a lot of things disappointingly tiny. Cough cough Nidoking cough.
>He gives Rayquaza a wide eyed stare, laughing nervously.
"I'm glad! Kinda... Um... Malasadas! Those are the things! They um... Don't have any in Unova though, we'd have to go back to Alola!"

>>9660229
>The man looks out the window at his ex, groaning
>She's gotten a fucking mob with pitchforks and fire pokemon and the kadabra fucked up and sent them a block away AGAIN
Okay, Carl, let's try this one more time, get the angry mob away from here, send them to... UNDELLA TOWN!

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>>9660160
Noooooope. The kids who normally stop by are in school right now. Kanto school years are a lot different from Kalosian ones. Not that Kalos is out yet either, but still.

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>>9660193
>Sweet.
>>9660229
>>9660303
Pfft.
>>9660302
>Mega form is probably like... 100'-120'. Basically.
Yeah I can do Alola.
>Rayquaza grabs the champ lightly, being sure not to turn him into spaghetti.
You want a ride?
>>9660339
Well, that's booooooring. Go find some fights. I hear Alola is poppin' and Hoenn was there for a while.

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>>9659778
>>9659809
>>9659927
>>9660079
>>9660160
...huh.

>>9660385
Oh great the legendary is laughing at us.
Come on Carl, Steve didn't spend the last ten years with you for you to fail us now, teleport the angry mob to Castella!

>>9660432
>It worked
>Angry ex-wife plus mob: teleported
...Okay hi everybody I've just had a rough fucking day and I'm pretty sure my boss is going to blame me for all that so what do you people drink when your world turns to shit?

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...Huh.
Salandits are... interesting.
Anyways, what is there to do on Melemele island?
The locals are nice, so I'm willing to look around and try stuff.

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>>9660385
Tobias and I already did the Alola Island challenges.
Hoenn could be nice, I'll see about it.
In the mean time... What should I doodle on Tobias' face?

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>>9660385
>Sun squeaks in surprise, squirming a bit in his grip.
"Um... Okay? That works um... Am I riding on your back or.... Do I get carried?"

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>>9660432
Finally.
>>9660441
Gasoline. Try whiskey mixed with diesel, it's great.
>>9660447
I dunno, bout to go there myself.
>>9660510
Besides dicks? Dare you to draw the weather trio. Or the regis, they're chill.
>>9660579
Gonna carry you, hope you aren't claustrophobic or scared of the color green. I'd offer you the back spot but you aren't wearing a space suit, nor do you got any hook things.
Anything you need to grab before we go?

>>9660441
Vodka and Sitrus juice is my go-to "oh god everything is fucked" mix.
Goes down semi-easy, kicks hard, and after the third drink I'm basically running on instinct and feeling absolutely no pain.

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>>9660691
... I'm not a good artist, but I'll try.
>Begin doodling a space noodle on Tobias
Isn't it only one of the Regis that's "chill"?

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>>9660691
"Um... Nope! We can go whenever!"
>A quick text is sent to Anabel letting her know where he went
>>9660447
There's caves, if you wanna explore those!

>>9660691
That's what I drink when I need to die.
...Is it sad that the weirdest part of my day was my Ex-Wife finding where I work after I we got relocated, and not talking online to a Legendary?

>>9660714
That sounds fantastic, guess I'll head home and mix that up.
Heh, "home".

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>>9660827
If you aren't it'll look better than what some of the delta followers draw.
Ice is chill but I'd probably hang out with all of them. Gigas could kick my ass if he wanted.
>>9660965
Alllllright. Hold on tight.
>Rayquaza hugs Sun to his belly.
>And they're off.
>Rolling for seconds until they get to Alola with last number.
>>9660974
Not really.

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>>9660691
...Right.

>>9660965
Caves?
What kind? Crystal caves?
Or just...caves?

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>>9661042
I don't think Gigas can kick something that doesn't exist.
>Move on to drawing the lava lobster

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Good of a time as any to put my plan into action.
>Rolling.

>>9660974
...Why is the concept of home funny to you?

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>>9661042
>Sun spends a few moments patting his hair into place and catching his breath
"Okay! There should be a malasada place in Hau'Oli city!"
>>9661109
Um... One of them is an island challenge cave, and another is a cave that leads to the ocean and the last one is um... also an ocean cave!

>>9661259
Something my lawyer says I shouldn't talk about publicly.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got tall glass vodka and Sitrus juice mixed up, and there's a Reuniclus sharing the drink, my life is about to get weird in the best way possible.

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>>9661109
Look who beat your speed record, Lati.
>>9661187
He can kick my... Dicks? Dunno, dude.
>>9661288
Alright.
>Rayquaza plops him on the ground.
Next time I'll see if Sapph still has her space suit thing. Lead the way Mr. Champ.

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>>9661327
... do I even wanna know why that's a plural?
>Doodle the whale yet.

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>>9661327
>Sun takes his time walking to Hau'Oli, occasionally looking over his shoulder or giving grass suspicious squints.
Sapph? Who's that?

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>>9661434
...Have you never seen a snake?
>>9661537
You alright?
She's, uh, Sapphire. I dunno, haven't seen her in a while, figured she wouldn't mind if I borrowed her space suit.

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>>9661671
Yes. Do I go around looking at everything's genitals? No.

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>>9661671
I'm okay! The last time I was home this guy kinda stole my Decidueye, I reeeeeeally don't want it to happen again!
Um.... Is she related to Ruby at all?

>>9661244
>Dubs plan
(I'm interested in this)

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>>9661699
I see why you humans needed us to help you along. My advice: Check out more genitals.
>>9661733
I can eat him if he comes back. Uhhhhh... I never asked. I'll ask Ruby when he's done with his contests. Orrrr Sapph if she turns up.
Is your mom gonna get mad if she sees me? I think Ruby's dad was kinda mad when I kept blocking the front door.

>Rolling for sekrit stuff

>>9661798
>SotN shop theme.wav

>>9661899
oh no

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>>9661244
>Dubs.
>33 and 77 aren't hard to find.
>Waiting and watching.

>>9661916
(not related to the beedril, basically that means nothing as far as the thread is concerned)

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>>9661899
(rip u)
>>9661845
I don't.... Why? Why would I need to know what your dicks look like?

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>>9661930
>33 is reading a bunch construction books.
I think we're going to have to hire someone for this...
>Rolling to figure out how to set the walls up.

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>>9661845
>A smile crosses his face, not quite reaching his eyes.
No... Mom doesn't really get mad about anything anymore. Or talk much. She just kinda brings her food to her room and watches tv.

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>>9662001
>Nearby a dinosaur attempts to read. The book is held upside down and the pages flipped in the wrong direction, but he tries. It's obvious he doesn't actually know how to read.

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>>9661982
...Why not? What are you living for besides dick?
>>9662019
...Isn't that bad? The draconids were like that when I almost broke Zinny.
Then again she kinda deserved it.
>He follows Sun, plucking Sun's hat off and putting it back on him backwards.

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>>9662001
>Odds.
>Not very well.
>Rolling to see if he can figure it out any better.
>>9662055
>33 laughs at the pokemon's attempt to read.
Good try, Lucky.

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>>9662090
My Pokemon? My job? Sex is a hobby, not my life.

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>>9662090
Yeah, it's um... really bad... Oh hey! Look!
>The appearance of the malasada shack catches Sun's attention, the Champ barely noticing the switch in his hat.
Is there a kind you want?

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>>9662125
>A low grumble leaves the dino's throat. He flips a few more pages before simply deciding to acquire that eating the book would be the best way to obtain its contents. Several torn up pages fall to the ground ass he stuffs the poor book into his mouth.

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>>9662307
I'm fuckin' with you. You should take up something else. People that battle all the time usually have a second hobby.
>>9662348
Yeah maybe-
>Rayquaza elects to shut up and talk later.
...They do sweet?

>>9662377
>dubsfail
>Books aren't food. Lucky starts choking.

>>9662125
>Nope.
Fuck I don't get this.
>Rolling f-
>>9662377
>>9662456
Lucky for fucks sake!
>Attempt to give the dinosaur the heimlech.
-33

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>>9662416
>Sun giggles, moving a hand to cover his mouth.
All malasadas are sweet, silly!

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>>9662416
I was going to make a joke about fucking with me but I forgot what it was already. Shame on me.
Uh... I've considered it, but I'm really not sure what to do for a hobby. Maybe I'll cook frog legs and see how many people I can piss off.

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>>9662502
>The book is promptly coughed up. It's covered in a thick layer of sandy mud and riddled with teeth marks. It's promptly kicked across the ground by Lucky.

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>>9662693
Please be more careful, big guy.
>33 pats the dinosaur and heads back to work on the building.
>Rolling.

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>>9662557
Well I don't really know anything about these things. Surprise me?
>>9662589
Shame, shame. What was it, "I haven't le stretched enough, oui."?
If you're going to cook I can grab some of the old ass draconid books. You'll learn how to descale a Bagon and that Metagross have meat.
They don't have meat.

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>>9662849
No such thing in Kalos. Stretching is our national past time. We have more preptime than a certain Unovan super hero.
... Frog legs was a joke but... I guess I can try it? I might get assassinated by Siebold, but I can try. Buuut I'd still rather not cook Pokemon.

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>>9662849

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>>9662849
>They don't have meat.
Jokes on you.

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>>9662849
Okay! Surprise it is!
>He dashes into the malasada shack, returning fifteen minutes later with a large box
I got the variety box! There's one for most kinds of berries! You'd probably like this one though....
>Sun fishes through the box, pulling out the Yache berry Malasada

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>>9663000
>Volvagia

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>>9662803
>Attempt to be helpful by imitating 33.
>Rollin'

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>>9662975
Holy hell, I'll need to see that in action.
Go for it, be the best damn battle cook in Kanto.
>>9663023
Well, I guess that's one way to get crab legs.
>>9663054
Really? Alright I'll...
>Rayquaza reaches for it hesitating for a moment.
>He elects to land softly and bring his head to Sun's hand.
>He pulls Malasada out of Sun's hand with his tongue, probably getting the arm wet in the meantime.
Hey, that's pretty good.

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>>9662803
>Nooooope.
>33 doesn't get this at all.
>>9663121
>Pat the dinosaur.
You want some grub?
>33 produces a bag of Chople Berries, offering one to Lucky.

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>>9663257
>Sun starts chuckling softly
Hey, that tickles!
I'm glad you like it though, I heard you have a nasty problem with ice and stuff and um... Yache berries are supposed to help with that!

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>>9663257
Well hell, you're a legendary and Kalos is really casual about sex. You could probably just ask any random person on the streets and they'll oblige.
I'll do it for you, Fug~
Jokes aside, I'll give it a try. Brock has that title right now, but maybe I won't completely suck at battling.

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>>9663299
>The berries are bruised to hell and back, but Lucky doesn't mind. Food is food, and he trusts 33. His whole head is thrust into the bag, scarfing down berries and covering his face in berry juice.

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>>9663408
Thanks, Sunno, you're great.
>Rayquaza boops his snout against Sun's head.
The hell am I gonna do without kids like you?
>>9663438
You'll start stretching for me or you'll get off your butt and cook?
Heheh, either is good with me. Remind me to get you some of those books.

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>>9663501
>33 chuckles.
Must have been hungry.
>He wipes the juice from Lucky's mouth.
>33 looks back over at the foundation.
...Should probably read up a bit more.
>33 busts out one of the construction books and reads through it again.
>Rolling for how much he understands.

>Meanwhile in New bark town, a dead inside looking guy receives a pokedex from an even deader inside Professor Elm
>Rolling for complications

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>>9663503
>He pats Rayquaza's head, scratching the brow lightly.
Um... Live off of Clefairy! They're from space, right?

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>>9663503
Well, that was a joke about getting off my ass and cooking, but if you're asking~.
Hey?
Here's your reminder to get those books for me.

>>9663665
>Elm: "Here's teh dex function the yadda yadda yadda you already know these things... wait..."
>Elm: "...didn't Rowan kick you out of his lab"
>oh fuck
>Run the fuck out with no starter
>But at least registered again as a trainer with a shiny new pokedex
>"Bloody hell that was close"
Hello again Internet, did anything happen in the last days?

space noodle goo

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>>9663547
>It's hard to read when a dino keeps sticking his face in your book, isn't it? Some god out there must have something against either your or construction, because it just isn't happening.

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>>9663792
>A sentret jumps past, and stares at the person for a few seconds before hopping away again

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>>9663702
More Beheeyem up there than those things. Besides Clefairy taste like marshmallows.
What else do you got in Alola? Any cool towers? I love me some towers.
>>9663753
I might be a little too big for you. And old. Mostly big. Definitely big.
I'll do it. Maybe.
>>9663792
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Nope.
>>9663821
800,000,000,000,999P if you want some.

>>9663876
>The still unnamed Shuppet has been startled
"Huh"


>>9663899
Shite.

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>>9663792
Death and destruction.

>>9663899
Really? Charging us for sex?

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>>9663899
Um.... We don't have any towers, but we have a mountain and a giant tree! It's a really, really big tree like...At least 300 ft tall!

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>>9663899
Hey, as long as we're both adults the age thing isn't a problem.
I may be Kalosian, but I'm not Siebold. How big are we talking?

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>>9663939
Sorry, pally. How you been?
>>9663946
Dragonids gotta make their rent somehow.
>>9664050
Oh shit, big trees? I call dibs on chewing the roots.
I am the Nidhogg. Where is it?
>>9664148
Like... fifty... sixty feet?

>>9664205
Hosts here either went full narcolepsy or dropped off the face of the earth, now I'm basically homeless but hey I'm a registered trainer again.
Beats being stuck in a pokemart.
>Rolling dex scan

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>>9664205
It's on Poni Island! It's kinda hard to miss it, we only have one really big tree!

>>9664268
>Ding
>Female
Well 4chan, guess Shuppetbro here is a Shuppetsis? Any of you got a name rec before I register her?

>>9664205
...Who the fuck makes you pay rent?

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>>9664205
..... huh. I think we found something that not even Siebold would be able to take. Assuming you've got girth too, anyway.
I'm sure we can figure something out.
>>9664405
Charmeuse.

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>>9664340
Poni Island it is then.
>Grab the Sunno.
>Rolling for seconds to Poni Island with last number.
>>9664268
>>9664405
...Rags?
>>9664412
Draconids gotta pay for food and upkeep of the sky pillar.
>>9664423
Yep.
...Nice. Tell Frenchaman to hit me up sometime.

>>9664205
Dude...
Okay I'm very, very drunk so this might be weird
Have you ever had someone crawling around inside there? I've heard in some of the weirder places that it's a thing big pokemon can do to small pokemon and it apparently feels really good?

>>9664405
Hmm. I'd say Juliet for a Sinnoan, or Saki or Miya for a Johtonian, but I'm terrible with names.

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>>9664451
Pretty sure he lurks here.
I guess I'll go try to do the cooking thing, drop by Viridian whenever.
>And he's off to go cook.
>Probably something simple
>Like mousse
>Rolling for success

>>9664452
...That is a thing, yes.
Speaking from experience.

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>Desmond: Drink some expensive wine, sit back and count your cash.

>>9664451
>Finishing taking a few notes unrelated to Shuppet
Please.

>>9664423
>>9664509
IDK I was just handed it over but might be Johtonian.

>>9664452
Yeah, and congrats.

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>>9664451
Okay so, there's the tree!
>Sun gestures in the vague direction of the tree, smoothing out his hair again
It has a lot of strong trainers, if you wanna try? Or you can chew on the tree, if you want! As long as you don't break it, I think?

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>>9664452
...Vore? I mean I like eating things as much as the next dragon but ehhhhhhhh.
>>9664538
Take care, don't start any fires.
>>9664622
Rags it is then.
>>9664625
I'm usually banned from these places, eh...
>Rayquaza floats around the battle tree, placing Sun on his head.
Kinda lame. You got any super cool pokedestined quests you need done?

>>9664686
I meant have you ever shoved a pokemon or human up your dick but apparently I'm tooo drunk for sthis shit and Rena isn't hlepin

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...I just remembered why I hate plane rides.
But at least nothing seems to be burning like the last time.

>>9664452
First try to be less drunk. Second, yes

>>9664729
>answering questions not foryou
nice to know SB cockvored ray

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>>9664686
Just one, I'm gonna get a feather and befriend the Hoh-Hoh!
Um... at least I think that's what it's called? The bird!

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>>9664710
Oooooooooh. Nah, the draconids tried to put the body and form worship together and tried to stuff a Salamence down my dick.
Not fun.
>>9664808
Ho-Oh? Can't you just ask for it? Pretty sure that's what Gold did.

>>9664710
>Ha ha inspiration time
What pokemon is Rena?

>>9664686
Yes, it's going to be Rags
>Ball go
>Shuppetsis balled
>Registered as: Saki

>>9664902
Ahaha bloody hell.

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>>9664902
Yeah, that's the one!
I thought that you had to get a feather and then these bells and then have these ladies dance to summon Ho-Oh?

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>>9659345
Good for labor. Woefully uncultured. Not bad in soup.

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>>9664939
Awesome.
>>9664971
I mean, you do I think. I dunno, you need a ride to Johto or are you gonna beat their gyms or something?

>>9664939
She's my girlfriend and a Reunicls

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>>9665039
Um... I don't actually have a feather yet! There's only two around, and I guess one went missing? The last one is reeeeeeeeally expensive though, so I've been doing a bunch of weird jobs to get the money!
I guess we could steal it, but I don't want Annie to put me in jail...

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>>9665164
Yeah, you aren't exactly jail ready, kid.
>Rayquaza pauses for a moment, tapping a claw against his chin.
...Maybe we can sell moon rocks or something... You wanna go to the moon?

>>9665068
Drink hitting you pretty hard there?
I warned you three drinks in you'd be feeling no pain.
>>9664729
"Okay. Fair warning, the place is gonna be a little messy when we get there."

>>9665164
So Sun, you ever get that Lunala issue dealt with? Been away for a while.

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>>9665210
>Sun mirrors the gesture, hand coming to his chin
Um... Don't we need one of those suit thingies for that?

>>9665418
>Fuckgin fuck autoupdate
Um... No... I haven't seen Lunala in a while though so I think um... I think he probably went back to Ultra Space?

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>>9665423
Hm... You wanna go to Sapphy's house?
>Rayquaza doesn't care, he's already going to Littleroot.
>Rollan, travel time with last number.
>>9665483
...Lunala? Is that why you tasted like grape?

>>9665483
Well I'm happy for you, you didn't need something like that weighing on you. Plus two foot long bat dick and grape soda doesn't sound very delightful.

>>9665350
Psychic feedback as well, it's rfeally fun to share the drink like thiss

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>>9665552
Oka-
>He flusters a bit, voice dropping to a mumble.
I.... um.... yeah....
>>9665579
Um.. Probably not... 'Cause grape soda is gross, right? Ha ha...
>Sun chuckles awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck and sliding his phone into his pocket.

Right, um... Which house is Sapphire's?

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>>9665681
>The reaction is noted with a slight squint.
>Rayquaza points to the house on the left.
That one. Should be in her room, tell her mom I said you could borrow it. Big blue suit, kinda bulky.

>>9665681
I mean hey if you liked that's fine. I personally think grape fanta is delicious. It's just the idea that it's Lunala's...well you know.

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>>9665758
Okay! I'll be right back!
>The actual conversation with Sapphire's mom takes very little time. Finding it is the actual test of patience, considering Sun's seemingly nonexistent ability to locate objects.
>20 minutes later Sun returns from the house, space suit in tow
Tada!! Um... Are there any uh... Special things I need to put it on? Like um... Straps and stuff?

>>9665661
I feel you there. The Psychic I hang out with is pretty high-energy, pulled the sensory link thing a few times before.
It's got some side effects if you overdo it, though, so don't try to keep that level of connection going 24/7.

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>>9665979
Hat and backpack need to go. Take the shoes off...
>Rayquaza squints looking like he's thinking really hard.
It's pretty simple to put on? There's an inner layer that needs to be tight and the outer layer has a few clips at the shoulders and the back of the head that need to be done. We can test it before we go, obviously.

>>9666058
We didn;t use it for longh, just long enough to get very drunk very fast and exhaust ourselves in bed

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>>9666110
Alright, hat, backpack, shoes...
>He removes each item as he says them, tossing them into Ultra Space
Okay so...
>Don the space suit less than gracefully, with a fair amount of fumbling at the clips.
So... How do we test it?

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>>9665661
>>9666058
Aaaayup.

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>>9666188
>Dubs.
Looks like you did good, but...
>Rayquaza grabs Sun gently and floats down to the small lake in Littleroot.
>It looks like its been dug deeper recently.
Tell me if you feel any drowning.
>Rayquaza lowers Sun into the water.

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>>9666228
>There's a moment where he wonders how exactly he would say anything if he were drowning, but it gets brushed aside in favor of checking out the lake.
>Suit works fine.

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>>9666335
>Rayquaza pulls him out after a few moments in solitude.
Working well? Alright.
>He plops Sun on his back.
There's a hook at the waist and shoulders. Hook those into me, deep as you feel you need. Trust me, you don't want to come off in deep space.

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>>9666205
"Not long now. As soon as we touch down, let's see if we can get over to the house."
>John chuckles.

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>>9666415
"Hau-oli, where my life jumped the sharpedo"

cock

>>9666666
fuck you

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>>9666666

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>>9666666
Checkles

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>>9666666
>Alcock is now teleported to your location
What in every possible fuck?

>>9666666
fucking wasted

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>>9666666
Cock!

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>>9666570
"You know, it's funny. I never thought I'd be able to come back, even if I wanted to do so. Now I'm walking Hau'Oli again."
>Time to get off the plane and get back home.

>>9666666
>A cock worthy of Giratina himself has been granted to this anon

im so booooooored

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>>9666735
"Barely managed to know the place back then, I was busy trying to get into that damn oil rig"
"But now I have the time"

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>>9666384
"Um.... Nebby could probably snag me if that happens, but alright!"
>Sun searches for the best spots to attach the hooks, eventually settling for hooking them into edges of the plating, taking advantage of gaps between plates to wedge them in deep.
"Okay, what now?"

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>>9666846
Now we ascend. I'll start out slow before we leave the stratosphere. Tell me if they come loose.
>Rayquaza straightens out and starts heading toward the sky.
Oh, don't look at the Sun. You'll go blind.

>>9666814
me 2 famalam

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>>9666666
Darn I was going to steal this for the pony thread

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>>9666818
"We have time, and one of the best places there is to spend it."
"I wonder when Desmond's getting here? I didn't see him on our flight, but I could've missed him..."

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>>9666898
Alright, I can do that!
>Time to admire the view.
What's the moon like?

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>>9667011
"Going to guess finishing a loose end"
"This feels a bit like an early retirement"

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>>9667020
Pretty nice, kinda lonely. We can see the Apollo and all the crashed ships. Time to get through the stratosphere.
What's Alain say?
Beyond evolution, mega evolve?
>Rayquaza uses Dragon Ascent.

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Do you ever get the feeling that someone just stole your catchphrase? Or is that just a "me" thing?

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>>9667050
"I prefer to think of it as a career change to something less volatile. I might pick the day job back up part-time, but I'm not sure yet. We've got a decent cushion financially to get re-established with."

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>>9667059
You can Mega Evolve without a trainer? That's so cool! Do you even have a stone?

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>>9667140
"I can do consulting jobs, just not anything with a fixed workday in case of emergency"
"You sure the house has enough space for everyone?"

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>>9667172
Not at all, hahahaha! Isn't this amazing?
>Rayquaza speeds up immensely, exiting Earth's Exosphere.
>He orients himself toward the moon and keeps going.
This is Fug space travel, on your left you'll see the Earth, watch out for Unova. Keep your hands on the Fug please.

>rollan for sekrit stuff in Sinnoh

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>>9667227
"Pretty sure, yeah. It's not tiny. The big question is furniture - it was pretty sparse even before I left, and it's probably that some of what was there walked off in my extended absence."
"Ready to see what we're working with?"
>John turns down a side-street - they're near the far side of town now.

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>>9667293
"Guess we will have to spend a few days restocking and repairing"
>Following
This is pretty far out

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>>9666666
Nice numbers.

>>9667256
Sinnoh is full of rednecks.

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>>9667338
Hi Jiro

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>>9667338
That hat is a practically a relic. 100P for it.

>>9666723
Yes, hello.

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>>9667236
>The hands are firmly planted on the Fug
There's a lot of places I don't recognize.... Hey wait....
>Sun squints at Earth
There's one shaped like Arceus?? Aw man, I thought that was fake!

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>>9667353
(new phone who dis)

>>9667361
I'm sorry did you... did you say you wanted to BUY my hat? I scoff at the very idea! This hat is a gentlemon's hat. It exudes class, sophistication, and general bad-assery. You're out of your mind if I'm going to willingly part with it! Plus I look PAWsitively fedorable.

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>>9667398
Your...

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>>9667419
>>9667398
...GF

>>9667398
>replying to shitposters
fliter time

>>9666993
Kill yourself

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>>9667398
...Several of those things were not words. And the ones that were are simply inaccurate.

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>>9667329
"It's not too bad, the commute's pleasant enough."
>John opens the door.
>Shit's pretty fucked - the furniture and appliances are MIA, except for the refrigerator, and the house has obviously been broken into. Nobody's cleaned it in months, though since it's had no permanent resident for about as long that's unsurprising.
"Well, it's a house. It's gonna need some work to make it a home."

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>>9667419
>>9667435
Lucario the Magnificent wasting his seed on a common harlot? Not likely!

>>9667461
Inaccurate how!? Don't you criticize my superior lexicon.

Hey guys, where do i find a Rotom? Do they have time manipulation powers like I've heard?

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>>9667468
"Good thing I didn't get my legs fucked up"
>Peering into the inside
"Well, doesn't look like a drug den, at least."

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>>9667396
Ransei? Yeah I've been down there. Nobunaga is a rad dude.
>Rolling for travel time to the moon with last number, only Sun/Ray posts count?
It's pretty nice to see this stuff from above.

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whenever i see desmond i think of this
someone plz make him become crobatman

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>>9667490
To wit, "bad-assery", and "fedorable" are not words. Your excessive emphasis on the word positive caused you to mispronounce it. And I regret to inform you that such attire has been out of date for roughly 40 odd years, barring the occasional revival.

As long as we're at it stop throwing words you found in a thesaurus in your sentences to sound smart, it's just pretentious. And that's coming from me.

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>>9667572
Who are you to mock my vocabulary!? What manner of Pokemon has the brazenness to slander I...
>The Lucario quickly pulled out a thesaurus and flipped through the pages, desperately trying to find the right word. A triumphant point to a word in the book indicated that he had discovered it within moments, and he smirked at the Dragalge
....Lucario the Magnifcent!?
>Yes, he looked through a thesaurus for his own name

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>>9667621
>the world's smuggest pile of kelp puffs his chest
I am Lord Arch-Curator Commodore Baron Alcock, Doctorate of History, Geology, Sociology, Toxicology, Biology, Literature...
>the list of superfluous and obviously non-legitimate titles goes on for several hours

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>>9667522
Yeah! There's always a lot of light pollution from Hau'Oli, it's really cool to actually see the stars for once!
>Sun's voice is filled with pure awe and wonder

>>9667505
You can order a Rotom dex, jury's out on time travel

>>9667668
There's gotta be someone that can prove it one way or the other right?

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>>9667653
>And Lucario, the self proclaimed "Magnificent" listened to the seaweed-esque Pokemon list off various titles and accomplishments. At first he actually believed him and was impressed. Then he kept going. And going. And going...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdZQL04sDBU

>until the Lucario was grumbling underneath his cap, pulling it by the brim down past his face in frustration while he stomped about impatiently. It was a wonder he managed to last this long without exploding into a fit of rage. Oh, no, there he goes.

ENOUGH! Do you think listing off a bunch of lies make you intelligent!? Unlike you, my intelligence was rightly earned through study and reading!

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>Proxima and Centauri are hovering in the air, taking in the moonlight.

>>9667522
>>9667661
>Centauri squints at the pair as they fly by.
>...How...strange...

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>>9667661
Hell yeah it is.
>Rayquaza lands on the surface of the moon.
The Eagle has landed. Care to take the first steps of Alolankind?
>>9667747
>The green and orange noodle flickers on the moon, 120' is probably enough to barely be seen with the naked eye if the sky is exceptionally clear.

>>9667726
And then Lucario realized he actually doesn't know anything about the world and he is completely wrong about life.

>>9667712
They don't, senpai. That was a rumor spread by the guy that was working on the Rotomdex design.
Pretty much an ARG, he started it in 1990 when the dexes first came into mass production.

>>9667794
Well fuck.
Does anyone know how I could go back in time? There's something I need to undo.

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>>9667726
>fragile sneaky seaweed ego: had been dented
>now the yelling starts
>somehow, his mouth still barely moves
>it's a bit creepy actually
>dude must have one hell of a diaphragm
And mine was earned by decades of field work and study. Save your academic prattle for someone with the time, you sophist. I am the greatest archaeologist in the world! I've done more in a week than you will in your entire meaningless life, boy! I was raiding tombs before you were even born!

>>9667813
What is it you want to undo?

>>9667505
Yeah, they do.

>>9667813
Uhh... I suggest talking to celebi or diagla. That's your best bet.
What is it you want to undo?

>>9667833
>>9667841
Uh...
My parents died.

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>>9667773
>A bunch of nerds with telescopes are probably mind blown right now.
Alright! Time to be the youngest human on the moon!
>Once the hooks are undone Sun takes a flying leap off of Rayquaza, landing with a poof of moon dirt. He continues jumping around for a bit before calming down, turning back to Rayquaza.
Okay so... We were grabbing moon rocks, right? .... are moonstones from the moon?

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>>9667789
>Lucario, presented with a rational argument towards his beliefs, gave it a few moments' thought before...

Okay, so maybe human and Pokemon relations aren't all that bad. However, I'm still firm on my stance that Sinnoh is a region full of religious backwater hicks.

>>9667816
>the slightly flustered Lucario tilted his hat a little to cover his face, leaving only one eye to peek out at the incredibly angry Dragalge

...I'm to expect that a frail pile of reptilian salad can dig up anything?

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>>9667773
>Good job me for paying attention, I didn't realise they were on the moon, fuck.
>Well to be fair if any Pokemon were going to notice something happening on the moon it'd probably be the psyrocks.

>Centauri's Solsquinting intensifies, attempting to make out what the green and orange speck on the moon is.

>Proxima calls out psychically.
>Hello? Is someone out there?

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>>9667888
Not going to pass out on me, right?
>Rayquaza gives a small chuckle.
Yes, yes. You'll have some serious samples if you get anything from the soil or interesting rocks.
>>9667903
>You're fine, man.
>Who the hell is talking?
>Hellooooooo? What's up?

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>>9667901
>for half a second, it almost looks like the irritable kelp pile's permanent scowl breaks into a horrific mockery of a grin
>between the time it takes to blink it's already set back in it's usual unimpressed frown
I don't know. Perhaps you should brush past the pile of bodies my companions and I left in Hippodown and see for yourself. With any luck you'll step on that lovely dart trap. Perhaps I could pop those spikes out and have them melted down to something more impressive then.

>>9667862
That's rough man, my condolences, what makes you think you can undo it though?

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>>9667963
...Heh

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>>9667946
Um... Nope! I'll be okay! I feel kinda like I might puke and my stomach hurts, but I haven't eaten today so I think I'll be fine? Moon rocks!
>Sun runs off to go find some interesting rocks
>Rollin'

>>9667975
Because it really only affected four people: me, my parents, and the killer. The world won't change that much if I could save them, right?
I just need to find a way...

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>>9667946
>I am Proxima, a Lunatone. I sensed your presence on the moon, who are you?

>...Hello...I...am...Centauri...

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>>9667963
Perhaps, but...
>Lucario twirled around, and in what was surely the most silliest thing he's done that day, grabbed the hem of his cape and ensured that it would twirl in spectacular fashion around with him. The bipedal canine Pokemon now had his back to the seahorse, in a rude display of attempted coolness. The Lucario turned his head and said..
...would either of us do either of those things?
>I'm sure he thought that sounded and looked cooler in his head.

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>>9668007
>embarrassed poison noodle sounds
>awkward pause
>the Cock has noticeably gone from purple to maroon, in what is definitely either a blush or sudden internal bruising
...Look, he called me a mean name, I'm allowed to be a little melodramatic sometimes, stop judging me.

>>9668047
I... wait what? I already... Do you mean the thing about going back to Almia just for that? Or...? Why are you spinning?
>He's not even embarrassed or mad anymore
>just confused

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>>9668032
Alright, I'll wait here, heh. If you start feeling sick we can get outta here.
>Rayquaza floats after Sun.
>>9668046
>Squint.
>Hello, my friends call me Buzz Aldrin.
>Sure you've heard of me?

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>>9668047
Heh... lame.

>>9668066
>Not even angry, just being his usual creepy self
>Creepy and down with evil for the sake of loot and fights
Heh heh heh.

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>>9668066
>mistaking the confusion from his weird choice of words as a sign that he was winning the "debate", Lucario pressed the attack!

What's wrong...? Have you met your intellectual superior?

>>9668134
You take that back you oversized Mudkip! You take that back right this instant!

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>>9668088
>Intensified Solsquinting.
>...That...is...untrue...
>...Buzz...Aldrin...is...a...human,..you...are...clearly...not...human...

>You are not something either of us have seen before, although you have similar colours to a Rayquaza, as far as we can tell.
>Who are you and why are you on the moon?

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>>9668088
>One cool rock: get
>I think instead of rolling for individual rocks I'll just fucking
>Roll for how many rocks Sun deems interesting enough to snag
Okay, I think I've got enough rocks!

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>>9668134
...Look I had a much better rebuttal planned, he made it racial so I went a little hammy with the thing for a second.

>>9668145
Your syntax doesn't make any sense. Are you asking me if I would actually raid a holy site for personal profit? Because I already did that. Or did you mean would I actually go back to Almia just to mutilate your dead body? In that event, no, that would be a waste of resources.

Also, for the sake of your own well-being, and because I don't feel like hiding any more bodies at the moment, refrain from insulting my coworkers.

>>9668035
What happened to the killer?

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>>9667519
"Time to grab the coffee and get at least one room livable?"
>Time to Start Fixing Shit!

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>>9668173
>...I am...
>...Rayquaza's twin.
>Sayquaza.
>Roll to not laugh.
>>9668176
Alright, looking good, Sunno.
>Rayquaza lands.
You wanna go or check the place out a bit? One of those space ship thingies is over yonder.
>Point at the Lunar Module a ways away.
Eh?

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>>9668200
"Hell yeah"
>Coordinate the teams
>Brew the coffee
>Help in fixing not heavy shit that needs both arms

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>>9668183
Your... co-worker?

You're an actual explorer!?

>And on that day Lucario learned that other Pokemon could also do things. It would be a lesson quickly forgotten in the next episode.

>>9668195
No one knows, he vanished, I don't even know what he looked like under the balaclava he was wearing

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>>9668200
>>9668237
>Whoever broke in missed one appliance - the vacuum cleaner
>Got to get an el cheapo coffeemaker and assorted cleaning supplies, though.
>The place is going to be livably clean, albeit still unfurnished.
"Whew... gonna need to start with sleeping bags, I don't think we'll have time to get beds tonight."

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>>9668219
>The rocks get stored in Ultra Space with his bags and clothes
Oooo, looks fun!
>Sun runs off towards the lunar module, just barely containing the urge to touch it
... what is it?

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>Zibel grabs his things and splashes into the water.
>He probably isn't coming back.
>Any time soon at least.

>>9668298
Not even a motive?

>>9668350
Not that I know of, but then again, I was only ten when it happened, it's been long time now.

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>>9668295
Heh, don't forget.

>>9668349
...Zibel?

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>>9668295
...I already said that. Multiple times. Pay attention boy.

>>9668349
...Well. That was... easier than I thought it would be.

>>9668367
...Did he say anything to you?

>>9668359
I'm sorry about your parents, amigo.
For the most part, though, the dead stay dead, and the past stays past. If it helps any, the guy who did it probably died as violently as he lived, and was judged.

>>9668359
Why did you wait however many years to bring this up?

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>>9668311
"...we have sleeping bags?"

>>9668415
I somehow doubt it, there was something about him, I'm sure he's still running around somewhere.

>>9668417
Because I just turned 18, so now I'm not stuck in a shitty foster home and can actually go do something about it.

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>>9668405
Heh nope... boss.

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>>9668422
"We will once I get back from the store."
"Catch you in twenty."
>John: heading out.

>borb drove off a character by being an edgy faggot
good job
you finally joined the shitty gm club

>>9668431
The other anon has a point, it has been a lot of time.

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>>9668348
>Rayquaza follows after him.
Uh, it's the place where the astronauts stay when they came here.
>He pokes it, jostling the door open.
>The inside is fairly small and cramped, the old equipment is unpowered but there are a lot of dials and cranks.

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>>9668349
Zibel??

>>9668367
>>9668405
Where's Zibel going??

>>9668431
And your plan to do something about it is... to travel back in time?
Good luck kid, you're going to need it.

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>>9668455
>He hesitates for a few moments before curiosity gets the better of him, Sun climbing into the Lunar Module
Hey, think it would still work?

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>>9668435
...
>clear throat
Yes. Well then. I suppose someone will have to notify Remi. Perhaps he's got some-

>>9668480
Or not.

We don't know. He just left. I was hopping you'd know.

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>>9668367
So, does that make you a mon of science then? Then, there's no sense in arguing! It's our sacred duty to stand steadfast against the outdated fairy tales that the humans are perpetuating!

>>9668405
Believe me, sir, you have my utmost attenti-

>stomach growls

...oh dear.

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>>9668439
"Later, then"
>Vacuum up floors, if that has not been done yet
>This is going to take a while

>>9668447
It has, but if I can go back to the past, I could fix things, save them!

>>9668505
Thanks, if, in the end, I can't go back and save my parents, I'll be looking for the killer as well, it's been eight years, and there's never been any proof he was caught, that plus the way he just... it was almost casual how he killed my parents, I can still remember it, just fucking shot them like he was talking about the weather, and left. I get the feeling he's been doing that for a long while.

>>9668555
Your plan would need divine intervention, amigo.
If I had anything to go on to find this guy, I could keep my eyes open for him, but I've got nothing.
I knew some real shitbags back in the day. Eventually, their luck runs out.
I'm sorry, man. I know it hurts, but the best advice I can offer is to get counseling.

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>>9668513
>Roughly like this, for a reference https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/da/Apollo_Lunar_Module_Inside_View.jpg.
>Rayquaza sits outside.
Probably not, the fuel is probably exhausted or not worth using at this point.

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>>9668480
I don't know, heh.

>>9668524
Right on time, heh.

>>9668528
Heh heh, yes. Stand steadfast against the humans, got it, heh.