ITT: Pokemon are real (An RP thread.) What do you think of the

>>9545489
hoops or jirachi

>>9545489
hoops and jirachi a bes

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>>9545489
They are all weak. But cute.

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>>9545373
"The girl with the purple hair, she's a beacon for Legendaries and Mythics, I swear"

>>9545395
"Several, I've been translating them because they show how to build a rather... unique structure, a giant statue of Arceus that people can live in"

>He pulls out his dex, aiming to get caught up on the world.
>>9545489
Well Darkrai is currently looking over my shoulder and not trying to kill me so they're pretty chill.

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>>9545576
>His single eye stares Quincy down, unblinking, unmoving, and completely unreadable.
"A.... what? None of these terms I understand."
>>9545395
"Ah... I see. No longer are they referred to as gods?"

>>9545542
>>9545507
desu hoops should purge the gays

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>>9545576
>Darkrai ruffles Quincy's hair.
And you haven't called the 4.53 billion year old shadow to help you translate why?
>>9546021
God still applies. Legendary and mythic are more of ranks. A legendary usually has created something and a mythic usually represents something.

>>9546055
but hoops is a gay

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>>9546021
"They are, and they're still respected as such, we've just done a very silly thing and re categorized them once a bunch of people started becoming allies with them."

>>9546091
"I don't really know you all that well, and asking for a Mythic's help to do this feels... I dunno, wrong? I feel like this should be a regular man and pokemon's effort, but I'll take any help I can get"

>He pulls another scroll from the pile, and unrolls it, revealing intricate diagrams of a system within the Statue that seems to run through every room, along with schematics for the intended layout of the building's core

>>9546134
tru
especially since he was played by skitts in the beginning to purge emrys so he can take control

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>>9546091
>>9546198
"I see..."
>Gadreel goes quiet, slumping against Darkrai and watching the scrolls over his shoulder.
>>9546296
(The fuck are you smoking, anon? I didn't play Hoopa.)

>>9546296
anon how many darkrais have you smoked in the last hour

>>9545489
Mesprite, Uxie and Mew are cool with me.
Mesprit needs to cool down with the sugary stuff, though.

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>>9546389
Hehe!
I absolutely refuse!
>Chugs liquid chocolate

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>>9546420
I think they call this a forced diet.
>Roll to snag the chocolate.

>Frankie: shitpost, and try to think of a faceclaim
>>9545489
To be honest, I should think more about them. I don't have any strong opinions on them.

Anyway, I think I got the transfer I was looking for at my job, but I have no idea what I'm doing now. It's not the craziest thing I've leapt headfirst into, but it's still a little challenging.

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>>9546552
Bork.
>Azoth: Lick.

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>>9546513
Hey!
Hands off!
>Quickly chug rest of cup, overdramatically throwing it aside
>Bap hoopa on head, attempting to change his emotions to "crippling depression" for a few minutes

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>>9546580
Hello??
Yes??
Friend???
What is happening??
>>9546552
Hello??
Yes??
Who is??
>Anomalesia clambers over Azoth, thrusting his snout against Frankie's chest to sniff him.

>>9546335
idk skitts
how many times are you going to (((accidentally))) run into gladion on /vp/ for the 10th time in a week?
how many times will you be a hypocrite and say turts is a crazy stalker and proceed to talk to jiji about the type of person he is, change the discord image to gladi, and then whine about not lewding with him first?
how many people will you drive out to complete your fantasy?
no
better question
how long can you keep this up?
how long until everyone sees through you?
how much longer will you disregard others for their opinion?
oh sorry I meant (((shitposting)))
how much longer will you say it's
>Le hurrdurr Noodles, Meme, Turts
>hide ignore lol
until it no longer works?
how much time?
how much time do you have left before it all falls apart?

>>9546420
Well, lets see who is the most spherical next time a pixie party forms up in my area.

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>>9546634
What the?
>Flop tiredly.
>Roll to drop a rock on Mesprit.
>>9546686
(A for effort.)

>>9546699
If she doesn't die from redic amounts of diabetes first.

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>>9546699
>>9546745
Ha!
Shows how much you know!
I'm immortal! I don't gain weight unless I want to!
1 pound forever!

>>9546728
>Assuming this is like, a baseball sized rock, and not a boulder
>Rubs head, in pain
Ow...
>Pouts
That hurt.

>>9546091
Then what are the birds? Articuno and its brethren are often cited as among the first legendaries to come into contact with humanity, yet I am not aware of any major creation attributed to them.

>>9546809
...that isn't how immortality works though.

>>9546809
Well you did seem chubbier the second time.

>>9546686
ok

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>>9546699
Dude, keep your fetishes to yourself.
>>9546809
>Yeah, Hoops isn't in murdermode.
Well you made me depressed.
>Reaaaaaaaach for chocolate.
>>9546844
KEEP YOUR FETISHES TO YOURSELF OR I WILL BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN.

>>9546866
Well sorry for being observant!

>>9546580
>Frankie: is licked.
"Hey there, big guy, how are you?"
>>9546638
>Smells like a Grunt. And also fish.
>Confused Grunt Noises

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>>9546686
(There was a period of two days where Gladi showed up in the same threads as me on /vp/. It was only five times or so. I was in those threads before he was, as those are the threads I typically browsed and still browse.)
(We said Turts was a crazy stalker because he went and calculated his heartbeat and legit considered suicide because he missed him getting online.)
(Wow, what a surprise - guy gushes about his boyfriend. Are you going to get after Bones and Jiji for doing those exact same things?)
(My salt never came from the fact that I wasn't the first to lewd him, it came from the fucking jokes everyone was making about it. I couldn't give less shits who Gladi lewds. It's roleplay. Who gives a shit.)
(Yes, I have a tendency to be an ass. I'm an asshole, there, I said it. Yes, I fucking ignore people's opinions when it's worded less like a concern someone wishes to discuss and more like whining.)
(So yes, I tell people to ignore whiny fucking bullshit like this because, oh, sur-fucking-prise it turns thread into nothing but back and forth shit flinging.)
(But nothing I say will fucking satisfy you, so enjoy the only (You) you're gonna fucking get from me.)
>>9546919
"...."
>Lick as well

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>>9546832
My body doesn't change, or at least, does it very slowly! That includes weight gain.
It's essentially locked as it is now!
>Chugs another tall glass of chocolate

>>9546844
Only by 0.1 pounds!
And that's over a century or two.

>>9546866
That's what you get for trying to steal my sweets.
>Pour chocolate on head

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>>9546913
At least dish out something nice if you want to get lewded by leggos, creep.
>>9547019
Geez, this is the stickiest I've been in a while.

>>9547019
You sure it was over a century and not a few weeks?
I mean, you did eat most of a box of kit-kats.

>>9547085
Calm down please, no one is trying to lewd anyone right now.
Not like I could.

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>>9547019
Sometimes I wonder if it's possible for you to have self control, and days like these confirm you cannot.

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>>9547085
You sure?
>Pour corn syrup on
>Chug the rest of the bottle

>>9547154
Or maybe I didn't gain any at all!
It's not like I'm checking.

>>9547190
Self control is booooring!

None of you weaklings could beat me in a fight.

>leggo spam
>2017
man its just like the farsail days

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>>9547227
It is incredibly important, you know this, if the world had no self control, all would perish.

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>>9547154
What? You can't? Are you scared or what?
>>9547190
Hey elfy. What's up?
>>9547227
Probably?
Maybe, I dunno.

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>>9547239
Ehh... Maybe somebody else here, bro.
I'm busy with, like, personal stuff. Sorry.

>>9547239
Wanna ERP?

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>>9547239
Fist fight or a battle? I mean, I'd probably lose either way, but still.

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>>9547239
Uh-huh, you know, I'd believe that, but I'm gonna say you haven't spent a year of your life in a frozen, dead region that only Ice Types can thrive in.

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>>9547239
Fight?

>>9547240
End thine self, upon a sacred blade, gifted by the dark heavens. Only then may they rest eternal.

>>9547274
Coward.

>>9547282
Get away from me, degenerate.
>He draws his first uchigatana and slices it cleanly down your middle, cutting you in twain. He flicks the blood off and sheathes it once more.

>>9547287
>>9547297
>>9547299
Whose next?

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>>9547258
Well, of course normal people need it...
>Chugs another glass of chocolate
But I don't have to worry about it at all!

>>9547263
Who knows?
>Chuckles
What have you been up to?!

>>9547014
>Frankie: sputter a bit.
"Ah, c'mon, buddy!"
"A-anyway... I'm Frankie, I'm one of the Grunts, and I'm supposed to help with, like, some stuff here, as well as hang out with you? Is that okay with you guys?"

>>9547014
>getting this triggered over a shitpost
>replying to a shitpost
Holy crap my sides

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>>9547263
No, I'm just kind of handicapped right now.

>>9547274
>"Very personal stuff"

>>9547323
>Files down that edge

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>>9547323
Okay, come meet me in the Sinjoh ruins I guess.

>Quincy looks up from his Dex, tucking it away
"I think the scrolls will be safe here for now, come on Zem, we're going to run some errands"
>He climbs up onto the dragon's back, and flies to the Sinjoh ruins, waiting for edge mcknife to meet him.

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>>9547323

>>9547380
>>9547388
Children.

>>9547385
>The swordsman walks casually to the ruins.
So, you're willing to try to take me on? I'll let you go first. I want to see the hope in your eyes before I crush you.

>>9547388
stop eating up image limit bones

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>>9547323
Yeah, no thanks. Fighting isn't really my thing. Come back if you wanna get drinks at the 5th Street Bar or something.

This katana player still isn't as edgy as Quincy t b h

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>>9547385
Heh.
What kind of errands?
>Lazily fly to the ruins

>>9547428
RAY?
REALLY?

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>>9547428
"What, no pokemon? Or is that a Honedge?"
>Quincy shrugs, his hands running over the six pokeballs at his belt, choosing carefully
"Alright, let's start this safe, Alexa, come on out!"
>He tosses an Ultra Ball into the air, revealing a Weavile!

>>9547451
(I haven't killed people tho? Quincy just LOOKS edgy because he's a fukkin weeb)

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>>9547477
( Not me, stop blaming me for this edgelord and shitstirring. )
( Now >>9547388, that was me. )

>>9547014
>220-age=max hear rate
>this spooped everyone
>can be googled at a moments notice
he p googled it to seem edgy imo

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>>9547333
>Anomalesia tilts his head, sniffing him one last time before returning his tongue to its rightful place.
"Hello!!"
"Yes!!"
"New friend!!"
>Despite having met Frankie before, Anomalesia continues to lick and sniff his "new" friend, tail wagging back and forth in excitement. He spends roughly five minutes doing this before calming down and plopping his rear on the ground.
"What stuff??"

responding to shitposts just solicits them

>>9547492
Ah yes, an animal. How adorable. Go ahead, make your first strike.
>After careful consideration of his twelve blades, he draws a simple single wakizashi, tracing a finger over the edge.
Come to your death.

>>9547530
fucking this
this is the exact same shit as dahrkness

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>>9547532
"Uh... dude? This isn't going to end well for you if you uh, aren't going to use pokemon, I don't exactly want to kill you"

>>9547592
(Ooc isn't weavile a horrible choice for a dude with a sword? Ya dun sent out a frail poke that's weak to steel.)

>>9547592
>not killing someone threatening your life
Wow you deserve to die a second time

>>9547610
>>9547614
(He legit doesn't know what this guy's deal is, and the ONLY reason he's not bringing out Oathkeeper and Oblivion is I didn't want to make this that kind of fight just yet)

>>9547592
>replying to a shitposter
i want mort back

>>9547632
>Oathkeeper and Oblivion

I thought this was a Pokemon RP not some shit I'd see on Gaia

>>9547648
this
mort died for nothing and now everything is shit

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>>9547648

>>9547592
>Sick of the human's whining, the swordsman takes a slow breath before raising his voice.
ZENKAI KASAHONA - INFERNAL OFFERING!
>He vanishes in a flash of darkness, before reappearing in front of the animal's owner and running twin blades through his throat and heart. Infused with the power of hate such as they were, they not only inflicted physical wounds, but sliced apart his soul as well. This technique sent what remained straight to Hell, as he deserved. A third blade flies from its sheathe and spins, slicing the bug he summoned to ribbons. All then return to him as the owner's body is vaporized.
Hmph. I know that is not the best you fools have. Give me more.

>>9547666
ok

>>9547632
(Not using RR(rumbling rose) and Hero's? What do you not like doing damage?)

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Hey guys, how do you get a pokemon translator working?

>>9547686
(When you play as Roxas you don't get to choose your Keyblades)

>>9547666
>TRIPS

>>9547686
(Oh and I missed the best blade of me all, pumpkin, somehow. I have brought shame to the kh2 tier list, myb)

>>9547699
>When you play as Roxas

But he's playing Quincy

>>9547699
(.... that's completely fair.... I assumed you where sora... whoops. Carry on then :D)

>>9547699
Have you tried clearing the cache and restarting the app?

>>9547711
(Quincy is a KH cosplayer weeb, and Roxas' keyblades are Oathkeeper and Oblivion)
>>9547726
(how do you mix that up)

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>>9547699
Are you sure it's a problem with the translator and not your Pokemon being quiet?

>>9547666
>trips
Does, uh, does that mean it actually killed him?

>>9547744
Dub dubs confirm death of Quincy

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>>9547729
Done that about a dozen times, borrowed a Porygon from work to try and fix it, nothing.

>>9547737
...You know, that's probably it, and I'm an idiot.
I don't know why my pokemon wouldn't want to talk though, Drax at least, he's been with me for years, I thought he'd jump at the chance for me to understand him better.

>>9547744
>>9547752
>Quincy is kill
>it took anime Samurai to do him in

>>9547752
Praise be to the dice lords.

>>9547744
(nah it took quads to kill him last time, I'm not gonna kill him over pure shitposting that happened to get satanic trips)

>>9547792
>insert shitpost about this here

>>9547734
(I plead the fifth, and suggest you send out a better matchup, such as garchomp)

>>9547792
>pure shitposting
Now you're just being an asshole. I was totally serious about this. And because it doesn't go your way you're crying over it?

>>9547792
>godmodding survival

You're hitting all the red flags of a roleplayer

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>>9547708
>>9547778
>>9547744
>( lolrandumb maximum overedge nothing personnel kill )
>( randomkilling pcs for the sake of randomkilling pcs )
>( yeah no this guy's getting ignored, this is dumb even by our autistic standards )
>( also, no (you) for the original edgelord supreme combo with a Mtn Dew )

Thread theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e51hgWIsY4M

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>>9547744
>>9547752
(If Em wants Quincy to re die to that it's up to him. The guy who killed him is a faceless rando that only just showed up this thread and reeeeeally feels like shitposting, so if Em decides to ignore it we aren't gonna blame him.)
>>9547761
Maybe they're shy or something. Sliggoo hasn't really talked to me either, but he's kinda

>>9547820
I mean you didn't ... let him respond... at all. You post implied you won, that seems like poor etiquette in a forum based rp fight but I'm new so what do I know.

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>>9547847
Hey there, how's it going?
Mind if I ask a few really dumb questions?

>>9547792
>call anything not your epic plan shitposting
top kek m8

>>9547820
(I somehow doubt that, given you ignored how combat works completely)

>>9547792
Christ you're such a faggot, but what should I even expect

>>9547882
There are no dumb questions friend.

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>>9547882
Ask all you want, might not answer, but hey. Go ahead and ask.

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>>9547935

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>>9547792

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>>9547847
I don't know really, he's apparently Timid but again, I've known him since I was six! He's comfortable enough with me to let me use him as a plushie, so like, why won't he talk?
And yes, I've asked him about this already, he just kinda brushed it off, or something.

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>>9548006

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>>9547882
>Message: just in case, lets try to keep the fact I'm awake under the lid

>>9547851
>>9547896
You consented to the battle, on my terms, and lost. Bitch.

>>9548039
>accuses his own people of shitposting
This is why HG laughs at you.

>>9548039
>phoneposting
Phoneposters can change IP at will though, sperg

>>9548076
ERP laughs at us too

Em really needs to stop fucking replying to shitposting

>>9547896
(Now I just want to see an example of how combat is supposed to work, this whole rp concept seems P cool, might roll up a char if I like how you guys run this, mechanically)

>>9548039
top kek

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>>9547959
In a nutshell, how hard is the door slamming behind me? I'm out of the group for good, but I'm not sure if there's any further action happening.

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>>9548108
(Our combat system for Pokemon battles is kinda getting reworked at the moment to fit the game's accuracy system, but for stuff outside of that people typically use odds = fails, evens = success.)
(It really depends on whether the encounter is being GM'd by someone or just done by you, honestly. )
(If you want I can have one of my characters go get in a short battle really quick to demonstrate?)
>>9548148
... didn't you resign?
>>9548041
Hey, might just be the quiet type. It's hard to tell sometimes. Maybe he's mute?

>>9548108
(Used to be evens hit odds miss gets were various levels of oh shit both ways, now it's based on IG accuracy rounding down if it's a X5%. Or something like that I haven't done anything since the change.)

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>>9548108
(Pokemon battles have been recently rehauled, they use in game accuracy rounded down to the tens, damage calcs using the Showdown calculator)
(Other, non-pokemon attacks often get rehauled as pokemon moves for calculations sake)

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>>9548039
>>9547792
>>9547666

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>>9548177
I did.
>Attempt to play it straight.
Thanks, I'm feeling a little better about the whole situation now.
Anyway, Des and I are heading to Alola in the near future, once Seb's awake and ready to travel. The homesickness is hitting me pretty hard.

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>>9547666
I, Owain, shall fight you!

>Little mac has seen men be shot dead in the alleyway for little more than some cigs and the shoes they were wearing. Little mac has been beaten, slashed, burned, torn to shreds and beaten to death thousands of times in an intergalactic battle royale. He had climbed his way to the very top of the boxing tournament with little more than a pudgy black man at his side and the indomitable will to never give up in the face of adversity. He stared into the abyss that was the crazed female in front of him, his eyes boring none of the normal warmth and happiness he usually has, the only thought dominating his mind was his dire need to overcome the impossible. His muscles practically bulging in a pure show of machismo, giving the woman just what she was asking for before and then some, the sight of a man in peak physical form, ready for battle and fucking at any time of day. He knew in the deepest reaches of his mind that she was more than ready to meet him at every step of the way, her body yearning for the opportunity to dominate him in ways he could scarcely believe. But he wasn't going to allow it, his honor as a boxer and a man were on the line. He slams one hand inches away from her head against the metal behind her, the metal clang of his rock hard digits denting the metal ringing through the empty gym. He moves forward, pressing his cock firmly against her belly with the prime intent to show her how aroused he was, and most importantly that there was no way he was going to be gentle with her after what she's done. Her giggle gives him a slight pause, but not enough to make him stop his advance, wanting to know just how truly deranged this woman was how far she would go to prey on the champion of the boxing world. His inhibitions were completely blown away at this point, the only thoughts repeatedly running through his mind was that he wanted to thoroughly dominate this uppity nymphomaniac with everything he had.

(1/3)

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>>9548201
>>9548193
>>9548177
(Oh that's super cool, and you guys rven use calcs! That's sick, I'm on mobile ATM, but in a little bit il check in and see if I can participate in a thread like this for real. Thank you all for stopping and explaining all this to me, this definitely looks like a load of fun. (Might have to tone down my inner smogonite tho, I feel like sweepers like specs lele might not be appreciated))

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>>9548281
>>9548331
(Going all out full battlan is not a problem, just take in mind there is a limited amount of legendaries at any time, and semis are in setting hard to obtain and train)
(Looking forward to your playing)

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>>9548273
Why do people do this, don't they know that sexualizing legendaries is usually a bad idea?

>>9548329
>Owain coming to PAR
I thought this was a fucking joke, I had to come and see if this was real.

>>9548461
After being dethroned in ERP, he's found another community to try and take over

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>>9548331
(No problem. We don't mind full Smogon as long as you aren't starting out super high leveled. Seeing the trainer build up and work on their team is half the fun. Anything else I would say has already been said by >>9548401 , so I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with)
>>9548281
Aw, you're taking Des with you? There goes my quest to get him into a pair of skimpy jeans. Well... Have fun in Alola, I guess. Watch out for jellies.

>>9548482
>Owain
>dethroned
As if, cuck.

>>9548431
Wouldn't you want to touch that butt?
It's a pretty nice butt.

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>>9548431
Like, I dunno. It's not even that hot a pic.

>>9548512
>getting exposed and then claimed by Kass killed all Owain memes and now nobody cares about what he does unless he plays a floating horsecock with a fuckable hole

>>9548482
>Dethroned
Our god will never be dethroned.
>>9548512
>Kissu this Anon.

>>9548533
He claimed Kass, you fucknut. The bird can't help but jerk off about him.

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>>9548518
I'd rather not say unless I'm certain I won't get struck down in flames.

>>9548519
It's not, but I've got nothing better to do with my time anymore besides look at garbage.

>>9548539
That's not what the picture says.

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HG thread, give me 24

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>mfw ERP drama flows into PAR and HG raid at the same time
>>9548570
1960's Lenny

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>>9548570
Lenny
>>9548582
uh

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>>9548570
Aron.

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Anagore Skywalker

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>>9548554
I'll take that as a "maybe".
Thoughts on this?

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>>9548570
Plasma Grunt

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>>9548570
Captain Luna

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>>9548570
Stinky Pete

To HG people:
This is not HG.
This is not HG.
You got given a link to flood and raid a different thread.
Stop posting HG here please

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>>9548570
Youmu Konpaku

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>>9548519
>"Garbage, it's what it is"

>>9548554
>Anonposting
Me neither, I hate it.

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>>9548554
>Shaking from sugar high
Personally, I don't really care what humans draw me like!
They tend to add on weird things though! Like breasts!

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>>9548570
Plague Knight

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>>9548608
...I'm gonna hope that Mewtwo can't strike me down and say that's not bad, not bad at all.

>>9548635
Depends on the reasons I guess, I'm successful and have too much time on my hands, what's your story?

>>9548648
...Well that's a relief, though I agree accuracy is better than just sticking tits on pokemon.

Oh Arceus what the fuck am I doing with my life, I'm so glad Kalos doesn't shame for this sort of thing.

>>9548633
Kys Gu-
>filename
Almost got me.

>>9548650
Come on asgore, not you

>>9548675
>>9548607
?

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>>9548671
Nice. Yeah Mewtwo isn't in the smiting business or else I'd have been dead a LONG time ago.

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>>9548671
I know, right?
It's just weird, how they want tits on everything!
By the way, how does this look!?

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>>9548570
Graves

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>>9548705
I guess I'll find out soon.

>>9548728
...I think you need a smaller size

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>>9548570
Sophocles

>>9548748
Are you humans really so interested in me sexually?

>>9548671
I'm not going to get into the details but I must stay in bed for a while.
If it were not becauseof my friend and the Internet I would have lost my mind.

>>9548608
>>9548705
...tell me more.
>Ian: begin another potentially unfinished writing

>>9548779
Heh...

>cracks open a cold ass

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>>9548748
Maybe.

>>9548779
If you are who I think you are, yes.

>>9548809
Here you go.

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>ask for 24
>get 10
You people are fucking shit at this, I swear.

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>Ask for 24
>get 10
You people are both fucking stupid and incompetent.

>>9548835
>>9548863
24mind...

>>9548671
I know, right?
My current boss doesn't give me grief for it, but when I lived in Kanto I got fired just on a rumor of it.
>>9548834
I'm... okay, you got my attention, and I'm not even that into guys.

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>>9548570
Dark-elf

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>>9548779
I'm a pokephile in general, I guess. Of course I'm not just interested in the sex, that'd be stupid, I'd hope for a romantic relationship.

>>9548783
That sucks, man, hope you get better soon.

>>9548834
Hopefully not.

>>9548892
Yeah well Kanto is a fucking laughingstock soooo...

>>9548809
...
>>9548814
I am.
>>9548913
What reason would I have to get in a romance with you?

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>>9548570
WigglyNurse

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>>9548892
Mewtwo kind of has that effect. Looks feminine enough that it tends to get you going even if you're fairly straightedge.

>>9548913
Probably not.

>>9548939
Well, I'd just like to say you are the most attractive pokemon I've seen.

>>9548608
>>9548705
>>9548834
...nice.

>>9548892
I've had that same experience, and I'm not speaking about how Kanto sucks.

>>9548913
Yeah, after this I'm gone to some warm beaches with the "friend".

>shitposting
>pornposter lewdfaggot
ugh im coming back later

>>9548913
Hey cutie, how ya doing?
>He walks up and smooches her on the cheek.

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>>9548939
None, you misunderstand, I'm looking for a relationship anywhere at this point, preferably with someone that uh, can keep up with me, I literally don't sleep so that axes a lot of pokemon and every single human off the list, so legendaries such as yourself, ghost types, and uh... I need to do some more research on pokemon that don't sleep.

>>9548992
Well he's not trying to hunt down and kill us so I assume we're good to go.

>>9548998
Enjoy yourself then!

>>9549045
(for once it's actually relavent and not shitposting so like, it's chill)

>>9549057
Del, if you'd kindly get this guy out of my house?
>Del the Delphox uses his psychic powers to throw anon out the window into the dumpster where he belongs

>>9548834
I'm pretty sure it is not cann according to my previous findings but...

>>9548939
Sometimes you just need your mind to wander lewdly

>Ian: fetch the previous, dickless Mewtwo notes

>>9549077
>godmodding
nice

>>9549077
>His gaze locks with hers for a few moments. As he peers into those incredible pools, awe overcomes him. It as if a searing, quaking pain was blooming in his gut. Mere seconds later, he almost thrust himself out of his desk. Though he lunged for the door, he knew that he couldn't make it in time.
I-I am so sorry.
>With a single blunt tug, he jerked his pants to his knees and squatted over the trashcan. It seems that agony in his belly was not just imagination, as fat globs of yellowish-brown matter burst from his charred pucker. One hand covered his face, tears streaming from his eyes due to a mixture of shame and pain.

>>9549077
...You know, you could still be able to pursue a relationship with Pokemon and people that sleep. Just do things while they are napping?

>>9548913
That's why I got out. That, and a minor incident involving a truck, a Pokecenter, a Glaceon, some and a few Pokemon from my team.
>>9548998
Dang. That's a heck of an experience.

>>9549096
WHAT

>>9549096
>kiss girl
>she's not pleased
>shit yourself
nice

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>>9549110
I suppose, but like, I just want someone that I can talk to all the time, it used to be Del, we could talk for hours and hours but then... something about the fact that I don't sleep unsettles him or something, I don't know, maybe it's because he can't be there all the time anymore, but he's gotten a bit more distant, and now I don't have someone to vent to besides the internet.

>>9549125
Yeah, I've heard there's a girl looking to change things there for the better but I doubt she's going to do much.

>>9549096
I'm so proud of this post.

What is the point of pokephilia?

>>9549213
The point is: fucking pokemon with tits

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Well this thread went to shit

>>9549096
>smirks
Losing you're cool that easily? Heh.

>>9549171
Well, both you and them could try to appreciate the time you spend together, instead of hoping it's 24/7?
If you get a partner, you might have to slow down for them.

>>9549213
Because love is love, regardless of species.

>>9548482
Let him have his fun
He'll have to dethrone a manipulative shedemon first, she goes by the name skitts
He'll also have to get passed the 6 GMs she's been puppeting
First is
>Bones the goo hatebone (Envy)
-He hides the fact he is most definitely hateboner as anons have pointed out in the paat, his shitposting is also mediocre. But it works, as its driven off most new blood roleplayers as he gets jelly they are better than he is.

>Ray the notable (Gluttony)
-He'll eat anything up as long as it's given correctly. But don't be fooled by this as he is a lot smarter then he let's on. So watch out!

>Chuckles the conflicted (Sloth)
-After being shitposted multiple times by what could very possibly be the other GMs he's just decided to lay off as it was getting to stressful. You'll be fine.

>>9549077
I try, I try.

>>9549125
All it takes is for you to find the correct man or 'mon and suddenly you're getting mind blowing sex from someone that barely gets to your waist.
As well as true love.

>>9549258
>Jiji the overtaken (Greed)
-After being fooled into thinking that Skitts, Bones, and everyone else cared about him and being given "love", "companion", and special permissions as a GM from them and not questioning it at all, he has become the puppet of a false lover and a real sycophantic bitch, he has become but an overly paranoid easy to manipulate puppet. Like his character stitches. He'll most likely commit suicide due to it all before you can even face him.

>SB the aggressive (Wrath)
-When he was first given power as a GM and string along by skitts he has slowly become a nice, witty, funny guy. Into an aggressive asshole who will blindly follow the higher ups like a raging orc or a wild dog. What made him human was stripped of him by the witch, Skitters. Remember he lost his own with all this. You can easily out smart him in battle.

>>9549286
>Emrys the overzealous (Pride)
-When and After he sucked up to the Witch he prided himself in being a kissass to her. His weakness is being to insecure. Minor shitposts will trigger him. It'll be a easy hit, easy win battle.

And finally the shedevil witch
>Skitters the unbound (Lust)
-She will disregard criticisms of all kinds, from legitimate to joke. She will approve and Disprove whatever she likes. (Anxiety anons being GM approved shitposters. Disregarding and/or doing very little about a problem and hoping everyone forgot about it the next day, or using BS justification for it. I.e the argument used on Noodles "You don't Rp and your lazy to go back and read everything in thread." While at the same time saying that keeping up with the discord rp was difficult to keep up with. She was just lazy and couldn't scroll up. This goes for most other GMs. Also telling new blood to ignore it and to not join it cause they couldn't keep track of and didn't want to lose posters. Like how they kicked Noodles without reason when he said he'd do his own thing and leave either way, then celebrating it ( looking at you SB, Zorro, Emrys etc. You know who you are) like twits.) But do NOT dare question her she'll pull the dumbest shit out of her ass at the last moment. She will also self insert fetishes and other things but justify them, then make fun of other people's fetishes and disapproving them. She will also use the stories of her quote on quote "Abusive parents" as a crutch to justify and pull everything and everyone along with her. She will be difficult to overthrow but plausible. Keep your head up high when facing her.

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>>9549077
Yep, no psychic murder yet, so we're probably fine.

>>9549213
It's fun. Quite a few pokemon are much more attractive than humans, male or female, both sexually and just in general.
Like, I wouldn't imagine it happening in this lifetime, but having a nice life with a mewtwo? That'd be great.

>>9549171
Yeah. There was even nasty rumors going around about that new translator tech in Kanto, saying it was a Rocket spy device or didn't work or would brick your 'dex, depending on who you asked.
Of course, the rumors mostly traced back to Saffron's psych practitioners, who didn't like not being the only game in town anymore for facilitating communication. The translator tech meant that they were losing out on their easiest customers.
>>9549213
What's the point of any non-babby-making sexual relationship?

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so what happened to this thread anyway
what's the big deal

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not that i care about your autism anyway
just avoiding cooldown on image only posting

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>>9549213
Same reason humans get in relationships: love, fun, I've heard making babies is possible but I'd rather not find out.

>>9549256
That's a fair point, but I've never viewed Del as more than a friend, though I would like him to be less distant again.

>>9549282
Well that's nice to hear.

>>9549302
You've got the right idea, living with pokemon, even just as friends, is fantastic.

>>9549331
Ew, corruption at it's finest.

>>9549171
Well damn, hope Del gets it out of his system.

>>9549256
Very true.

>>9549331
Kanto being a disappointment again, nothing new here.

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why do people even rp anyway
just seems like a waste of time to me

*summons Arceus*
"Banish this shitty thread, the trannies, and everyone who uses this thread into the deep, dark pits of Hell!"
"Heheheh! Now I have level 100

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>Roll to cook dinner.

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>>9549383
Yeah, it really is.

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>>9549383
You should really ignore these other assholes, girl.
>With a chuckle, Owain steps up and grabs onto her shoulders, chuckling. He raises his magnificent, meaty, manly hands and grabs her shoulders in a manly way, slipping her shirt down and ripping it off like a gorilla while making chuckling animalistic beast honks. His big hands grab at her titties and boobs, giving them a big squeeze and he spanks her fat pink nipples while slapping her breasts. Meanwhile he has been building up a huge, meaty boner in his manly dick and he is ready to use it. His infinite cock rips out of his pants like a chainsaw penis ripping out of his pants. Bulge, ugh. He grabs onto her ass with all hands and her feet and immediately lunges in, sticking his clitoris, her girl penis, into his sissy big cock.
Oof, you're pretty good~
>His balls are full of her cum and he begins to squirt on her, but he's not done yet. She pulls out and he turns her around, slamming his erotic cock into her puckered slightly brown butthole. No worries, he asks. He pulls in and rams back out, eliciting screams of delight from his manly meat penis. There's no more cock that he can put in her except he does, his balls smacking against her pussy and going into her pussy. When he pulls his penis out it is covered in her buttcum and girlcum so he quickly cums on her ass and lets her get on her knees and then he puts his big meaty manly dick in her feminine boy mouth and starts to slam into her and pull out of her and slam into her again to get rid of all off her booty and buttcum that is staining his penis. Then he pulls her up again and lifts her up in the air and begins to eat her out, nyah, his tongue fucks her pussy until he cums again in his own pants but his pants are off so he cums on her feet intead, making her feet be covered in his her cum. He keeps licking her until she cums from her pussy at which point he puts her down and smacks her with his manly, meaty penis.
Heh, satisfied, girly?
(1/4)

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>>9549430
To make It your power fantasy

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>>9549421
Thanks, but it's been two years and growing worse, I've talked with him about it but he just... he doesn't like talking much, anymore, he just wants to use me as his teddy bear and battle.

>>9549477
Now if only I could get a view like that when I walked into the bedroom.

>>9549485
5/10, not enough use of "cumslit" "tit flesh" "meat slab" and the thesaurus was barely touched

>>9549485
jeasus

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>>9549551
>Now if only I could get a view like that when I walked into the bedroom.
>Psycat: Attempt to be seductive on the bed.
>Rolling for skill.

>>9549485
OWAIN STOP
YOU HAVENT CLAIMED ALL OF ERP YET

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>>9549551
I know, right? It'd be such a pleasant surprise and everything.
Just such an aesthetically pleasing pokemon.

>>9549302
Having had sex with a girl once and pokemon multiple times, I'm going to have to agree, I don't really care for humans sexually or romantically.
Well, had it with an human male once and it was real enjoyable but that was a special case.

>>9549383
Can't imagine life without pokemon, anyone that sayse he can is lying.

>>9549551
Maybe he needs some sort of therapy. Or maybe he fears something?

>>9549485
will.. you.. shut... the.. fuck.. up..
i dont get pissed at people but jeasus christ
back off please its the internet and porn in a thread called /trash/ were people talk about shiting there pants and fucking dogs. and i get a little exited about some fun ass pokemon RP i had and you sound like im the weirdest one here.

so chill ok? jeasus

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>>9549591
Uh... hi?
>Very confused sleepless fashionista head tilt is go

>>9549608
Hang on, I'm not sure if there's an illusion or what because there's a mewtwo trying to be seductive, I think?
Yeah hang on real life is being weird again.

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>>9549660
...Am I not...?
>Spread legs.
>Sexily.
>Rolling for skill.

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>>9549622
Haven't done anything myself but I agree wholeheartedly. Pokemon are just more fun to be around, let alone have any sort of relationship with.

>>9549660
Oh? Good luck with whatever's going on then.

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>>9549681
...I'm going to be honest I have no idea how you got here or why you want to have sex with me but more importantly I'm not down for just a one night stand.

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>>9549485
Haha holy shit Owain what are you doing

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>>9549747
>Mentally remember notes on human romance.
Who said a one night stand? ...Baby.
>Put finger in her mouth.
>Lewdly. Very lewd. I am a master.
>Rolling to not accidentally choke her.

>>9549660
Could you report back after the deed? For "research"
>Ian: salivate

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>>9549787
>she gags on the finger and spits it out
Ew, dude, do you like, not realize that sex is supposed to come after actually getting to know each other?!

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>>9549825
...I am not very good at this.
>Oh god I've already read her a million times.
>Sweat.
So... Tell me about yourself.

>>9549660
Good luck, girl.
>Nerd: be a little jealous

>>9549703
Makes you wish to be a pokemon, doesn't it?

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>>9549885
It really does. Shame that's not really possible. Not yet, at least.

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>>9549876
>he's actually trying
>it's cute and kinda creepy at the same time
...I take it you don't understand humans very well, my bedroom really isn't the place for a date.

We need a Lucario.

Nufag, Rules and info pls

>>9549944
Double dubs of truth.

>>9549944
We have one.

>>9549944
Yes we do.

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>>9549924
...I understand humans well. I read every human I come by.
They are filled with greed and self-preservation.
>...
>Distraction: Happen.
>Paw at pillow like a cat.
Why is your bedroom a bad place for a date? Would my cave be better?

>>9549958
>REEE STOP USING MONS I DONT LIKE
Die

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>>9549958
Don't slightly disagree with skitts or you'll be blown out of the rp as they tell you to take a break while you are being shitposted

>>9549944
fuck off Noodles

>>9549992
Nigga what?
>>9550006
K. What about the actual rules.

>>9549958
(I can't give the rule bin because I'm phoneposting, but it's in the middle of being redone anyway. Our only rule really is not to lewd the underage characters.)

>>9549977
NO we don't, Skitts shitposted them off

>>9550037
We have one sitting on a cliff that inexplicably has wifi.

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>>9549990
...I'd judge you for that, but at least you're honest about it, which is more than some psychics will do.
>oh shit he's cute
>didn't actually get a good look is it even a guy?
My bedroom is a bad place for a date because there's not much to do in here and it's really meant for more intimate things. Out in public is better because you can do things like go to the movies or shopping or eat.

Alright these threads confuse me more than Kpop, what's the deal?

>>9550057
50% roleplay from a kinda continuing and confusing storyline, 50% shitposting
honestly just lurk a while, ignore the obvious shitposting, and hopefully you pick up on things soon enough.

>>9550057
(Some try to RP the life in the Pokemon setting)
(The others shitpost constantly)

>>9550057
It's a secret competition on who can snowflake the hardest

Protip: Dave won

>>9550057
It's a roleplay thread. Most of the characters use avatars to make telling them apart easier, but some don't. There's a lot of shitposting and bickering going on right now, but that's become pretty normal.

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>>9550055
...Then. Shall we try that...?
>Sit up.
Do you have anything in mind?

>>9550057
Was a dying RP thread. Got linked in a cringe thread on /vp/. Saw sudden surge of interest and activity. They had the great idea to shitpost HG and ERP and constantly link them back here to try and gain new users who are curious. Is not working.

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>>9550164
Why would you come on the internet and just lie? I really want to kown.

>>9550201
We know your game, faggots.

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>>9550155
...hang on, one sec.
>INTERNALLY PANIC
>QUICK, THE INTERNET WILL KNOW WHAT TO DO!
>She pulls out her dex and begins furiously typing

>>9549703
>>9549885
Send help Mega Mewtwo Y is in my fucking bedroom asking me on a date, what the fuck do I do!?

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>>9550287
...
>Move mirror slightly.
>Snoop.

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>>9550287
..Well you haven't gotten Mind Bullets'd and it doesn't sound like he's influencing you, so..
Go for it! You might never get another chance like this. Might as well give it a try, you know?

>>9550287
Date them?

>>9550164
>>9550111
>>9550104
>>9550100
>>9550083
I'm sickened but curious. How's this work?

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>>9550383
>>9550388
...I really don't think it's that simple, I don't even know where to go, where the fuck do you take an honest to Arceus LEGENDARY out on a date!?

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>>9550471
(Make a char that fits the pokemon world and have a go at it, I try to reply to everyone)
(I'd link the rules but phoneposting)

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>>9550498
The fancy places, obviously!
Or wherever they want to go!

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I require female trainers of the young variety.

>>9550471
For the most part it takes place in a 4chan style thread, so most characters are going to be communicating that way. Hence the dialogue focus.
Obviously it's a bit different if the characters are interacting in person, but not much.

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>>9550498
I assume you're in Kalos so, a cafe perhaps? Or one of those fancy restaurants I've heard about.
Legendaries are just like anyone else. Well, sort of anyways. Just like, really strong.

>>9550498
Same as any other human or pokemon, they have the same fellings and wants as any of us
>Nerd: wonder which leggos would psychmouse agree on a threesome with

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>>9550547
Whatdya want? If it's my pokemon the answer is no.

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>Time to figure out how all this radio equipment works.
>Rolling for if Berg can handle this shit.

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>>9550593
>Attempt to ora ora woman

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>>9550542
They want to either stay in my bedroom or check out their cave and I don't think this is the time for that.

>>9550573
...That should have been my first thought but now I'm worrying about the publicity. Picture it.
>Pokedestined sighted on date with Mewtwo
That's a fucking huge headline and I don't know if either of us want to be on the front page!

>>9550591
Yes I know but like, he's a LEGENDARY, he's had centu-
...wait.
Rocket only made the Mewtwos ten years ago.
Oh Arceus.

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>>9550918
...Hi, why are you batting at me with cloud hands?

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Unova has been so good for my inspiration. How is everyone tonight?

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>>9550965
Stranger things have happened. Don't worry about the press, nobody reads the paper anyways.
Just try and have a good time.

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>>9551004
Good, yo.
Posting on a borrowed 'dex, and, like, gonna go chill with my bestie.
It's pretty cool, and Unova's been, like, pretty good to us, mostly.

>>9550965
Its fine psychics mature fast. After all they live the lives of all around them they read..

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>>9551004
Panicking because a Mega Mewtwo Y is asking me on a date and I have no idea what to do and I've probably been looking at my Dex for too long and I SHOULD GO.

>>9550376
Uuuuuuuh hooow about a cafe? Have you been to one of the cafes around here before?

>>9551004
Trying to not get too bored by watching a Kalosian get wooed by a mutant cat and thinking of scenarios, you?

>>9551103
Good luck.

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>>9551004
Marshal tried to cheat at game night.
We were playing Monopoly.
His version of cheating at Monopoly involves stuffing money wherever he can to use later.
It was fairly amusing watching him try to pull money out of his shirt with a degree of stealth.

>>9550534
>>9550548
The rules would be appreciated if I could get them

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>>9551061
Nice to hear dude.
>>9551103
Smoooooch him.
>>9551123
Totes gonna see if I can get some refs for M2 dick.
>>9551231
Sounds like fuck. Yo, I'll be over to your nerdhole in like 4.
>Wooooooosh.
Hey do I gotta like... Fight my way in? I might make Grimz cry if I do.

>>9550994
fite the cloud

>>9551103
(damnit did that mewtwo narco on me)

>>9551280
Apparently M2 doesn't have a dick at all. You will need to get real bloody creative.
-Ian: keep trying to get real bloody creative, these writings need to be done

>>9551232
( Aight, basic rules: don't lewd underage characters or randomly "lol i kil u" other players' characters. If you wanna play a canon character, that's cool, just check with people to make sure they're not already being played. )
( For battle stuff [which is totally optional, but if you want to do it that's coolio], we use PokemonShowdown's calculator tool )
( Most stuff takes place over a fictional messageboard, although characters in the same general area can interact 'face-to-face' [inasmuch as that's applicable for an RP] )
( For general actions with risks attached to screwups, we use evens = success, odds = failure, with dubs/trips/+ being a greater degree of success or failure )

>>9551386
Well the latest gen of M2, the one that goes MegaY, is female.

>>9551422
I mean, it has nothing. No bloody genitals.

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>>9551280
Here's one for the pile.

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>>9550994
>>9551321
DO NOT.

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>>9551232
(The new info bin is a work in progress, basically >>9551391 is all we have for rules.)
>>9551280
No, battling is only necessary if you wish to do the League challenge. Most of us are in the champion room at the moment, if you wish to join us.

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>>9551099
I gotta say, 'chu got a point.
I've read, like, some pretty rough stuff before.

>Ray heads up to keep Seb company, as is a habit at this point.
"Yo, any idea when 'chu can, like, peace out of here, bro?"

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>>9551438
That, my friend, depends on who you ask, and what mood your M2 is in.