ITT: Pokemon are real - AKA the Pokemon Roleplaying General.

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>>9434864
shinies are the fucking bomb
fab af man
>>9434823
direct method is me shoving a hand down your pants so
gotta hear you say it dude
yes or no

>>9434864
dicx

>>9434891
fug him

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>>9434842
That's a step in the right direction. Now learn to not just invade people's rooms.

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>>9434891
>Sweat.
A-aye?

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>>9434848
I don't want to die.
>>9434884
ok.
>>9434941
...I didn't say it was my closet.

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>>9434970
Find your own place to be, stop breaking in to others!

>>9434785
Yeah, I'm going to need to think to where first, but, much appreciated.

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>>9434970
Come on, show that weeny Aegislash who's boss! Are you the trainer or trainee? Beat him with your other Pokemon! Hell, beat him with your fists!

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>>9434930
i mean
maybe
depends on if hes dtf
not gonna force him into shit hes not ok with
>>9434955
>A finger is slipped under the hem of Sord's pants before he pauses
you sure dude?
you look kinda nervous

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>>9434996
Ok.
>>9435017
A-alright!
>Rolling for success.

>>9434864
People's drive to capture 'Mons with just a change in pigment confuses the shit out of me.

That said the ones themselves are inoffensive I suppose. Some are quite aesthetically pleasing.

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>>9435090
...Yes! Aye! O-of course.
>Sord fidgets nervously.
J-just be done with it already, sire.

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>>9435114
I'm gonna take a wild guess and say you're not going to actually get your own place.

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>>9435114
Hey, how's it going kid? Knock the shit out of that bastard yet?

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>>9435114
If you're going to do something do it before you die.

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>>9435206
I can't afford my own place.
>>9435213
Sort of...
>>9435256
I did! I'm in the bathroom now... I'm going to go out the window...

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>>9434864
never saw one
but they are probably be really neat
won't go looking around for one anyway

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>>9435295
The window? Just what I thought you'd do.

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>>9435191
>He wraps an arm around Sord's shoulders and slides his hand the rest of the way down his pant
>Lightly touch the dicc
..... nah
no piercings here
shame
jacobs ladders are cool

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>>9435295
AW COME ON! Get your ass back in there and make that sword your bitch! He's never gonna respect you if you keep running away like a pansy!

>>9435315
>swuint

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>>9435295
Then go live with someone you actually know then!

>anime

>>9435315
>teleport bag of chips

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>>9435344
>Sord bites his lip hard.
>Rolling to not draw blood.
A-apolgies, sire. Are you d-done?

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>>9435401
i don't watch anime, mostly because it airs at the time i''m working most of the time

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>>9435378
I think they're gone.
>>9435419
...
>He takes a chip.
>And eats it.
>His hand lingers unusually long in the bag.
>>9435378
>He offers the bag to M- Kamina.
Chips?

>>9435444
that sucks. I like anime. also work makes me want to kms.

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>>9435401
Hey, you shit talking anime? I'll have you know that Kantonesian media has more depth than any of your shitty Unovan shows!
>>9435495
Yeah, thanks Leo. I'm fucking starving!
>Chips: grabbed
>Couch: flopped on
>He tosses a chip to a nearby Toxicroak
Think the Animecon shades will look better on Toxicroak or Greninja? It's gonna be badass either way, but I'm looking for maximum badassery here!

(all these new characters out of nowhere, I think I made a mistake using Maka as the face claim)

>>9435596
you didnt.

>>9435596
KaminaFC has been here before I think? You're good. So is everyone else.

>>9435596
>>9435617
(Kamina cosplayer guy isn't new, I just wasn't sure what to do with him for a while there.)

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>>9435596
(Kamina has been here before. I was brought in to help make the group a little more active.)
>>9435563
Greninja, definitely.
>Leo takes a seat on the couch and hands his Sableye an apple.
If you want maximum badassery why don't we get some mega stones?

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>>9435441
>He eyes his lip and leans in a bit
idk dude
depends on if you want me to be done or not
y/n

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>>9435513
it's alright
i still enjoy my work anyway

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>Anon flops out of bed, carrying Drax in her arms
Time to find a flying scorpion!

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>>9435718
Hell yes, Greninja is gonna be the manliest fucker alive!
>The shades are tossed to Greninja, who attempts to be impressive and catch them between the fore and middle fingers.
>Odds and they hit him in the face instead.
Mega Evolution? You mean the GREATEST DISPLAY OF MANLINESS EVER. MEGA EVOLUTION IS THE DISPLAY OF THE BOND BETWEEN TWO MEN, CAN YOU THINK OF ANYTHING MANLIER?

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>>9435859
>Thwack.
>Leo laughs a bit.
All according to plan.
Nope. Can't think of anything manlier. Maybe a sword fight?
>Google dusk stone prices while he yammers on.

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>>9435814
>She enters the outside world again, still carrying the ghost in her arms
>Rollan to find a flying scorpion

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>>9435983
>Poke with haft.
You lost?

>>9436004
>touch butt

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>>9435910
>""Kamina"" balks at Greninja
What the hell Greninja? We practiced this, you gotta actually catch it!
>And then turns back to Leo
The hell are you laughing at? Fight me, nerd! One on one, mano el mano!
Yeah, a sword fight! My blade vs your blade!
>He looks around for his con-safe katana, only to realize it's still in the car
... You win today, Leo!

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>>9436004
Not really, I'm looking for a Gligar!
>She hugs Drax tight to her chest
Who are you?

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>>9436120
Why.
>>9436179
Mortimer O'Donovan. Mort for short.
>He checks his dex.
Thoooooooooooose are in Johto. Up near Blackthorne. You want a lift?
>Phasma is sent out.
>He gives Drax a creepy look.

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>>9436121
Looks like you'll need to practice more.
>LV40 Doublade is sent out.
>They disconnect, making two LV20 Doublade.
>The one on the left floats over to Kamina.
You still want to?
>He gives a sly smirk.

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>>9436223
(What is Phasma, his Gengar?)
Gligar live in Sinnoh too though, that's why I'm here.
What's with the weird look?

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>>9436310
(Ding ding.)
Sorry, Phas is a weirdo.
>He returns the Gengar.
You want some help then?
>Mort tosses a rock at a tree.
Come out and play!
>Rolling to find a Gligar.

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>>9436261
Who the hell do you think I am? The great Kamina never backs down from a challenge!
DOUBLADE! USE SHADOW CLAW!
>Regardless of whether or not Doublade actually knows Shadow Claw this is his command. It's obvious he has no idea what moves this Doublade knows at the moment or what moves it could potentially learn.

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>>9436396
It's probably because I'm holding Drax like this, now that I think about it.
Yeah, sure, I guess.
>Rollan as well

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>>9436411
>A Lv20 Gligar wings out of the tree.
>Dubfail.
>The mother comes as well.
>Angery.
>LV60 Gliscor appears.
>Mort leans on his scythe.
You wanna take them on aloooooone or?
(I can GM this for you, no worries. Unless you wanna do something else or do it yourself.)

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>>9436410
>Left Doublade doesn't know anything but buff moves, Swords Dance and Iron Defense.
Just as planned
>Doublade uses Shadow Sneak.
>No Guard means it hits unless dubfail.
252+ Atk Doublade Shadow Sneak vs. 248 HP / 0 Def Eviolite Doublade: 14-20 (19.4 - 27.7%) -- 77.5% chance to 4HKO

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>>9436446
>Fucking cursed
>Quincy passed on his horrible luck to my next character when he died I swear

I think Drax can handle the smaller one, you take the big one!
>She lets the ghost drop to the ground and get into a fighting stance
Drax, we need to hold back so we can capture it, Focus Blast!
>Drax used Focus Blast!
>252+ SpA Life Orb Gengar Focus Blast vs. 248 HP / 8 SpD Eviolite Gligar: 69-82 (93.2 - 110.8%) -- 68.8% chance to OHKO

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>>9436484
Doublade use...uh... Night Slash!
>The blade just gives him a dumbfounded look.
Hey, Leo, what the hell? Is your Doublade stupid or somethin', why's it just sitting there staring at me?!

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>>9436582
>Baby Gligar is nearly KOed.
Nice shot.
>Gengar LV75 is sent out.
Phasmaaaaaa, let's not miss.
252 SpA Life Orb Gengar Shadow Ball vs. 244 HP / 168+ SpD Gliscor: 265-313 (123.2 - 145.5%) -- guaranteed OHKO

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(welp, see you guys..who knows when, if anyone ever gets tired or has enough of the extremely passive aggressive circlejerk hollow Shell that PAR has become and wants something more casual and less aggresive, you will be welcome in the thing that and a few others who feel the same are starting, just like find an old post of mine and PM me or use the link that I posted in the pastebin channel the other day, assuming that you guys don't delete that permanent link)

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>>9436648
Nice! Alright, now for the finisher!
>She pulls out an Ultra Ball
GET IN THE BALL!
>Vi used Ultra Ball!
>It's bonus to catch rate means 1s and 3s will catch the Gligar!

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>>9436626
Do you know what you're doing? Try swords dance.
>Doublade uses Shadow Sneak.
>No Guard means it hits unless dubfail.
252+ Atk Doublade Shadow Sneak vs. 248 HP / 0 Def Doublade: 24-30 (33.3 - 41.6%) -- guaranteed 3HKO

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>>9436674
>Click.
>Ding!
>Gligar is yours!
Good job, we stole a mom's child. What's next on your catch list?

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>>9436728
>She brings the Gligar right back out
...Alright I kinda feel bad about that, but like, look at this
>She goes over several wounds that clearly aren't from the Focus Meme
These two have been hurting out here for a while, you wanna scoop up that other one and bring them to a pokecenter?

>>9436703
Hey dude, what's your team?

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>>9436749
Brutal. Sure, lets go.
>Mort scoops up the Gliscor and follows Vi.
Leaaaaad the way, cap'n.

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>>9436703
Of course I know what I'm doing, who the hell do you think I am? Status moves are a waste of a turn, true men know that a good offense is the best defense!
Doublade! Use.. Brick Break!

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>>9436843
>Nope.
Oh my god. You're the brick that needs to be broken here.
>Shadow Sneak again.
>Unless dubfail, the other Doublade is KOed this turn.
252+ Atk Doublade Shadow Sneak vs. 248 HP / 0 Def Doublade: 24-30 (33.3 - 41.6%) -- guaranteed 3HKO

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>>9436813
>return to pokecenter
>get that new friend healed up and put him in the ball
>get that mom healed up and leave her behind
Right, now... the only two left are Wishiwashi and Charmander.
So I guess it's on to Kanto, and then Alola.

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>>9436908
>Well you got the right character this time.
>Mort gives the mother a nod and looks over at Vi.
Yep, you got a ride, cap'n? I'm sure we could ask Oak for one. Just walk in and act like you've never seen a pokemon in your life.

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>>9436983
(If I wasn't playing them both Serena would totally blow money giving people rides and traveling right now, she's a case of having too much money)

I was just gonna get a plane ticket, my job pays too well when it's really just porygon management. As for getting a Charmander, I don't want to trick an old man into giving me one, I'll ask, if he says no I'll go to the local breeders.

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Huh, that pokemart guy vanished, darn, I was hoping to help him out.

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>>9437055
(I'm so tempted to have Mort reply to Serena so you have to double character.)
Planes are booooooooooooooooooooooring. Live like like you're going to die.
C'mon.
My Gengar can shadow sneak us there. Maybe. Probably. If he doesn't act like a dick.

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>>9436885
>Doublade: KO'd
You're an ass, Leo! If that were a fair fight I would've beat you into the dirt!
>Toxicroak bleps at "Kamina" and Leo
Yeah, see! Toxicroak totally agrees, nerd!

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>>9437112
I know you could.
>Leo leans back.
What's next on the agenda? I really need an Aegislash soon.
>>9436782
Doublade, Zoroark and a Sableye. My Sableye really likes apples. Sorry for not getting to you sooner.

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>>9437109
...Shadow Sneak works like teleport?
>She looks down at her gengar
Drax have you been holding out on me?
>She chuckles at the mildly annoyed glare she gets
I know, my fault, still, that's something we should keep in mind.

>>9437070
Sorry, I'm dealing with a bunch of shits, one of them literally.
Wait... bloody hell TMs are not frisbees!

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>>9437289
Less accurate and takes longer but yyyyyep. Works better if your pokemon of choice is experienced.
Wanna try~? It'll be fuuuun.

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>>9437341
...Sure, why not.
Drax, I think you need to get in the pokeball for this.
>Fat ghost status: balled
Let's go.

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>>9437337
Right, so, name, and where you want to go, then just head to Jubilife airport and show them your ID, and you'll be on your way.

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>>9437392
Alright, hold on to something. Don't barf on the robe.
>Gengar is sent out.
>Shadow Sneak: Going into Kanto, aiming for Pallet Town.
>Rolling for accuracy.
>Odds are slightly off course, in Route 1 somewhere.
>Dubfail is a completely different town, let's go with Viridian.
>Tripfail means they go to Johto instead.

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>>9437163
>"Kamina" stretches out on the couch, crossing his arms over his chest and sulking
You know what would be cool for the next Animecon? A Mega Beedrill!

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>>9437478
Why don't we all get key stones and mega stones. Field trip to Kalos when sleeping beauty comes out of being comatose?

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>>9437442
>SHADOW SNEAKING BE WEIRD
>ROLLING TO NOT PUKE

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>>9437576
>And they're there.
Hey, first time doing that?
>Mort offers her a bottle of water.
Don't barf before we see Oak, man.

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>>9437607
>She actually managed to not puke, yay
Thanks... wow, that was a trip.
>She brings her ghostly gasbag out and scoops him into her arms, taking the water and drinking lightly.
Right, so Professor Oak, here's hoping this goes well.

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>>9437527
Hell yeah! Next 'con is gonna be sweet! How're we explaining this to the professors? "Hey Prof nerdface we're cutting class 'cause Kalos!"

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>>9437643
At least Drax there doesn't want your soul. Ding ding Oak here we come.
>Mort pushes the door to the lab open.
Go talk to him.
(You wanna roll for if Vi can get a Charmander or anything? I think someone picked up Oak so it's probably not cool for me to GM Oak.)

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>>9437668
...What about... "Nui has family in Kalos we have to meet?"
>Leo jabs his chest with his finger.
Say you're marrying Nui and you have to get her family's blessing.

>>9437709
(Apparently Oak is open, as is Silver, since they've only been used for shitposts)

>>9437801
(Alrighty. I cam GM up Oak orrrrrr you can roll for it. Whatever's easier for you honestly. Don't let me drag you along.)

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>>9437748
> The finger is carefully grabbed and removed from his chest
Hey hey hey, I know my pecs are irresistible, but getcha hands off the goods bro!
>He makes a disgusted face as the words register
Hell no! Why don't you do it? At least that's believable!

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>>9437709
>The pair enter the Pokemon Lab of Pallet Town
>Rollan to see if Oak has a Charmander available

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>>9437871
If that rumor gets around school you're going to have to get a job again. You want that?
>He jabs him again in the chest.
Very irresistible. I'm dying.

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>>9437872
Hey they have one. Come on, go get it from the senile old man.
>Mort shoves her a bit.
I'm not stealing stuff today.
Maybe.

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>>9437936
>Charmander get! Because Oak really does give out pokemon to whoever asks as long as they're nice about it.
Alright, five out of six... any chance you can get us from here to Alola?

>>9437409
Sorry again, shit was just fucking imploding, much like my life.
Name's Ian, thinking of Johto but first I need to locate a possible associate.

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>>9438004
Gonna need a last name too, dude, and a photo would also make things easier.

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>>9437983
Uhhhhhhhhh... Yep we know Alola.
>They don't.
>Check map.
>Shadow Sneak: Go.
>Rolls are gonna be diff on this one.
>Dubs: Brooklet Hill.
>Even: Hau'Oli City.
>Odd: Poni Island.
>Dub/tripfail: The fucking ocean.

>>9438036
Shit, one second, dex's camera is busted.
(Read as: have to think of full name and faceclaim)

Guys what do you do when you're sure a Salazzle is stalking you?

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>>9437907
Uuuuuuuuuuuugh, fiiiiine. I'll be her fake fiance. Blugh.
>He grabs Leo's hand again, slowly removing it and arching an eyebrow.
You trynna impale a finger on a nip? It's cold as hell in here.
>>9438197
Battle it! Show it who's boss! That'll teach it to mess with you!

>>9438246
If I battle it, it's going to use it's pheromones, and I don't happen to have a gas mask.

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>>9438197
>>9438271
Talk to a tox specialist. Alternatively kill it before it makes you a sex slave.
>>9438246
See? Easy. That's if she even agrees.
>Google how much Key Stones and mega stones are.
>A fucking lot.
It'd be less cold if you put a shirt on. Hell, the jacket would be good enough.
...How am I going to get 111,264,903P in such short notice... If Nui wants one that's going to be 333,794,709P for all of us... More for mega stones.

>>9438366
...If I capture it, would that help?

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>>9438087
>ROLLIN TO NOT PUKE
>HOLY FUCK SHADOW SNEAK IS DISORIENTING

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>>9438152
Not a problem, take your time, I've got nothing better to do except brush Del until he passes out on me again, got all my work done already, benefit of not needing to sleep.

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>>9438443
>Almost trips.
>I'll give you it.
>You at least don't barf that much.
...You alright? This island looks like it'd probably have those things. Here.
>Mort hands over the water bottle again.

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>>9438271
Pheromones smeromones! The will of a man can overpower anything! Don't believe in yourself! Believe in me, who believes in you!
>>9438366
Hey! This body is manliness in a physical form! If you had muscles like these you wouldn't wear a shirt either!
333,794,709 P? You two work the corner, I go into modeling! Easy smeasy!

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>>9438485
That was... a lot longer than the last trip.
>She wipes her mouth, taking a deep breath and washing down the leftover bile with the offered water.
Uh... I have no idea where we are.
>One dex check later
...Alright, Poni Island, thank you google maps, right, so there's no Wishiwashi here, they're like, a weird fish that can form a school and get a lot stronger.

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>>9438421
It might? Give it a try.
>>9438494
>Leo shakes his head at "Kamina's" comment.
That doesn't even factor in hotels or flight fees... Hmm...
>Rolling for if Leo has any methods to pay the fees.
>Dubfail is going to result in an angry ex.

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>>9438551
Fuck.
Damn. Let's try again!
>Shadow Sneak: Go.
>Rolls are gonna be diff on this one.
>Even: Brooklet Hill.
>Odd.: Kala'e Bay.
>Dub/tripfail: The fucking ocean.

>>9438494
Yes well I don't believe in you.

>>9438568
I guess I'll go pick up a pokeball and hope I don't get run down by a horny lizard on my way to the store.
...I can see it licking the window right now, this may be difficult.

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>>9438627
>ROLL TO NOT PUKE
>WHY MUST THIS BE SO STOMACH FLIPPING

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>>9438799
>Dubfail.
>OH GOD IT'S ALL OVER MY BOOTS.
...Do you need a second?

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>>9438830
>She groans from her prone position on the ground
I hate Shadow Sneak
>She takes a swig of water
...I think we're here though, so no more Shadow bullshit for a while.
>She slowly gets to her feet, wobbling a bit
...Let's go

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>>9438684
>GASP
HEY! YOU RUDE FUCKER!
>>9438568
Hey! Leo!
>"Kamina" rolls over onto his side, propping his head on a hand and flicking a chip at him.
She's still got that Togekiss, right? Free flight! Real men don't go hotel hopping, they camp out and tough out nature!

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>>9438861
Sorry. Gets easier the more you do it.
Let's see if there are any in the water.
>Toss rock in.
>Rolling for fishe.

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>>9438684
Sounds horrible. Good luck.
>>9438873
Hm... True. That'll make our travel easier.
...Have you ever even camped out?
>Message a rich bitch for a date.

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>>9438887
>ONE FUCKING OFF
>DUDE THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A FUCKING GOD FISH OR SOMETHING

Yeah, let's give it a shot. COME ON WISHIWASHI!
>Vi also tosses a stone in
>I realize Vi hasn't actually given her name IC and neither has Mort
>Rollan

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>>9438937
>I'm so sorry.
>Not really, we would have died to a LV100 godwashi.
>Also Mort did waaaaaaay up >>9436223
Man these things must be really jumpy.
>Mort tosses a sandwich onto the water.
>Rollan.
>I'll probably say we can't get any here if this roll fails.

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>>9438982
>not if I had ultra ball'd it
>also oh shit
>did you know School Form Wishiwashi are twenty eight feet long?
>Wishiwashi (L20) appeared and ate the sandwich!
HOLY FUCK THAT THING IS HUGE!
DRAX! WE NEED TO CATCH IT, USE HEX!
>The Gengar stands before the enormous fish, and fires off Hex!
>252+ SpA Life Orb Gengar Hex (65 BP) vs. 0 HP / 0 SpD Wishiwashi-School: 66-79 (86.8 - 103.9%) -- 18.8% chance to OHKO

>>9438873
I don't get what's rude about me not believing you. I simply don't trust that I can just walk right through Salazzle pheromones.

>>9438922
I think I'm going to need it, unless... maybe my father left some behind

>anon goes through his attic
>rolling

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>>9439045
>Rip us.
>Hyoog fishe.
Hooooooooly hell.
>Wishiwashi-School uses Feint Attack on Drax.
0 Atk Wishiwashi-School Feint Attack vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Gengar: 16-20 (10 - 12.5%) -- possible 8HKO
Yep, looks like you're doing good.

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>>9439107
DRAX COME ON, WE CAN DO THIS, IT'S HUGE, BROAD SIDE OF A BARN, HEX IT!
>Drax used Hex!
>252+ SpA Life Orb Gengar Hex (65 BP) vs. 0 HP / 0 SpD Wishiwashi-School: 66-79 (86.8 - 103.9%) -- 18.8% chance to OHKO

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>>9438922
Who do you think I am? Of course I've gone camping! Probably know more about it than you, Mr Know-It-All!

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>>9439079
I take it not?
>>9439163
Oh shut the hell up, no I haven't. And I've got a date at a rich house.
>He pokes "Kamina" in the nose.
That means money.

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>>9439156
>Ding!
>The school separates, leaving the leader at 1% health.
Ball it, quick!

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So while I wait for Ian to fix his camera or find another way to get a picture, I figure I might as well ask.
How many of you people are pokephiles? No judging, of course.

>>9439199
No, unfortunately my father didn't leave any pokeballs around the house.
Looks like I'm going to need to get out without the Salazzle noticing.
I don't even understand how it got here, I'm in Sinnoh!

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>>9439219
Yup! Come on Wishi, GET IN THE BALL!
>Vi used Ultra Ball!
>It's boosted catch rate means 1s and 3s count as captured!

>>9439224
I'm a bit uh, rusty on my terminology, is that just human to pokemon or does it work the other way too?
Asking for a friend.

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>>9439267
>Miss.
>The leader starts to run.
>Success only on dubs.
Oh, come on.
>The banette is let out and attempts to corner it.

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>>9439199
>Dubsfail
>He wasn't wearing his shades, so you jabbed him in the eye.
>Rolling for tears.
AAARRHG LEO, WHAT THE FUCK?!

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>>9439291
I don't know actually, there might be a separate term for pokemon that want to have sex with humans, or it's all just lumped together.

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>>9439307
It's fine, this next one will work!

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>>9439224
>>9439329
yo
how far do ya gotta go before it counts

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>>9439244
Hmmm...
Two questions. Can you get a level on it and can you give me a location? I can get to it... Maybe.
>>9439315
>Leo tries to hold a laugh back.
You fuckin' baby. Hey, someone in Sinnoh needs a strong man to save them. You game?

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>>9439340
I assume just wanting to do it counts? I don't think you should say anything, given how prude Kanto and Johto are, but as I'm not even affiliated with the League, I can freely say I've thought about asking Del about it a few times.

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>>9439369
dont worry dude i aint saying shit
just asking for all the curious peeps too shy to ask

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>>9439337
C'mon, toss it before it runs.
>If you counted that as a toss it missed anyway.
>Rolling for it to run on dubs.

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>>9439406
Excuse me for waiting for the right shot!
>Vi used Ultra Ball!
>It's boosted catch rate captures on 1s and 3s!

>>9439329
Oh, well uh, my Friend is into humans I guess. If that counts.

>>9439346
I do have a pokedex, it's level 40, I'm in Eterna City.

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>>9439394
Fair enough.

>>9439430
I would think it does.

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>>9439424
>Click!
>You got it.
Nice, nice. You want a lift back to Kanto?

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>>9439346
>A hand is clamped over the eye, "Kamina" glaring at Leo with the free one
Yeah, hell yeah. I'm always up for a challenge!

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>>9439486
...One last Shadow Sneak, and then I'm swearing off that move forever.

>>9439224
Pokephilia is a vile sin, humans are meant to be with humans and pokemon with pokemon. God wills it.

>>9439543
Your "God" is a load of shit.

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>>9439468
Alright. Building? Area? I'll see if I can get there.
>>9439508
Alright. Level 40 Slazzle.
How are we getting to Sinnoh with out a ten hour flight?

>Post on thread.
Hello, trainer here. Anyone know an easy way to get around with only two ghost types and a dark type? Are there any moves I can utilize?

>>9439543
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT
Arceus himself has gone on record here to say he's fine with pokemon shagging humans

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>>9439543
It's really not, and God doesn't will it, or he would have punished a lot of people.
I take it you're from Kanto?

>>9439589
I've never used it myself, but Shadow Sneak can apparently be utilized much like Teleport.

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>>9439538
Hold your breath, makes it a little easier.
>Mort and Gengar know Kanto much better.
>No failure except on a dubfail, otherwise they're ending up in Ecutreak.
>Rolling to get to Celadon.

>>9439589
Mansion on the outskirts of the city, look for the Salazzle at the window.

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>>9439628
Alright, I'll try that
>Having been informed of the trick, she will now not puke unless dubsfail
>Still nauseating though

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>>9439589
I dunno, you probably got some sneaky ass plan for it. Ass plans are always the meanest.
Level 40? Perfect!

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>>9439646
>Ding, everyone's okay.
>Mort chills on his scythe.
Awesome, take it you're going home?

>>9439571
>>9439596
If your so-called Arceus exists, then smite me!

>>9439614
Kanto, the last bastion of decency.

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>>9439699
This actually is home, well, close to home. So yeah, I'm on my way, gotta get training, but first I need to drop some stuff off.
I guess this is goodbye, see you around.
Oh, wait, I think I forgot to tell you my name, I'm Vi, it was nice to have your help.
>She holds out a hand to shake.

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>>9439614
Interesting...
>>9439637
Alright, thank you.
>>9439687
Kamina, come on. We're trying something new.
>Sableye is sent out.
>Rolling to get to Eterna City.
>Going to need dubs to actually get there.
>Even is outside of the city and odds are further away.

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>>9439718
I can't confirm Arceus exists, as I haven't seen him, but I DO know Yvetal and Xerneas, and I'm pretty sure I've drunkenly asked them at least once if they're okay with it, and they said they are.

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>>9439718
Aight kiddo, you asked for it.
>A T-Shirt for the video game Smite slaps anon in the face.
>It radiates energy and feels unreasonably soft to the touch - touching it makes you feel overjoyed. For some reason it smells strongly of vanilla, cherry, and strawberry.

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>>9439224
I was against it by faith, then I had a divine revelation and I'm still not sure of what is true and it is not.
The idea still disgusts me, though.

>>9439596
I...
How many lies are in this book?

>>9439718
Please do not invoke the ire of His Holiness.

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>>9439699
>Dubfail.
>Whoops, he cut himself.
Ow.
>>9439738
I'm usually lurking the thread. If you need a training buddy I'm around.
>Shake her hand.
Mortimer. Take care, Vi.

>>9439796
There's a reason it's in the fiction section of bookstores.

why do i get the feeling this entire general is just 4 people with split personalities posting at each other

>>9439788
>Angry nutter noises
Your taste in videogames is shit!

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>>9439759
Wait, wha-
>Rolling not to be sick
Oh holy hell, what the fuck was that? Where'd you take us, Leo?

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>>9439876
Hey, you asked me to Smite you, not to Hotline Miami you.

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>>9439797
I will. Thanks.
>She returns home and shoves those 80-something ultra balls she had in her bag into a drawer, and gets online, getting to work and checking the thread
Alright, I've got my full team! Thankfully someone was able to help me get around the world faster than a plane, so I was able to wrap that part up in a day.
Now it's just training them up and taking on gyms. Once I have sixteen badges, I'll hopefully be able to beat the E4, not gonna challenge Dave of course, but winning against them will mean they have to at least respect me a bit, and then I can start trying to change things around Kanto and a bit of Johto.

>>9439718
You are what's wrong with this backwards-ass region, and you wonder why the world laughs at us.

>>9439788
>>9439904
SEE WHAT I M-
WAIT
THAT'S ARCEUS
HOLY FUCK.

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>>9439880
Sinnoh.
>Sableye is going to be too tired to battle or shadow sneak for a bit.
Well... That's an interesting method. Looks like we're a bit away from Eterna City. First one to get there is the manliest?
>Leo takes off toward the city.

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>>9439788
>>9439904
Well... now I can say I HAVE seen Arceus.
Mind if I ask you a few questions?

>>9439796
It would seem there are a lot, I'm gonna guess it also tells you not to drink and that you can be absolved of crimes by begging god for forgiveness?

>>9439840
Nah there's at least like ten and none of us have split personalities, we just have the ability to make characters that aren't self-inserts

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>>9439543
I'd say 'fite me'
but I did a dumb and have a two week dry spell to look forward to
So Im just gonna go to my happy place instead

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>>9439941
HEY! AT LEAST WAIT FOR ME TO GET UP FIRST YOU CHEATING FUCK!
>Kamina and the two froges give chase - rolling to get ahead.

>>9440033
>Dubsfail
>The cosplayer fucking trips over a stray rock
>Rolling for damage.
>Evens he's just scraped up, odds it's a broken nose.

>>9439840
Majority of it is a handful of people with 20 characters.

>anon is currently having a staring contest with the Salazzle
>It is trying to be as suggestive as possible from her side of the window

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>>9439788
>>9439904
Your holiness, I am frankly confused at how to deal with the faith of my family now.

>>9439966
I'm a teetotaler by choice,which was not very easy back in Orre. Nor it is here in Kalos.
The latter is also true according to the faith.

>>9440087
Just fug it

>>9439904
>>9439919
>>9439989
TO HELL WITH ALL OF YOU
>Sobbing nutter noises

>>9439978
then why does every person I see feel the same
I came in here a few months ago to check it out and it looked like it was actually alive back then
>>9440071
oh that explains it, why what happened to the variety that i saw a few months ago

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>>9440033
>>9440052
>Leo tries to keep from laughing.
Come on manly man. We aren't going to beat up the lizard if you don't get your ass up.
>He helps Kamina to his feet.
He said out of town...
>>9440087
>Rolling to see if Leo can spot the mansion presently.

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>>9439989
What did you do?

>>9440102
Do not worry, friend.
I share your convictions, and lead a small group of the like-minded faithful in Couriway.
If you truly wish to seend them to Hell, perhaps we could arrive at some form of accommodation?

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>>9440089
Let them believe what they want. They aren't hurting anyone, are they?
>>9439966
Go ahead, whaddya wanna know, sport?
>>9440102
Maybe, but I doubt Giratina would appreciate the visit.

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>>9440129
I borrowed Frankies card
And I bought a bunch of rugs
Two cant be returned because they were final sale
The rest are going back but hes still grumpy
Too many and I didn't ask
. . .
Take a look at the rug in our room its super comfy and nice

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>>9440089
I understand that, it is poison after all, but yeah, begging Arceus won't get you out of jail, I don't think.

...Darn, I think he left, I was gonna ask him why he chose me and Calem to save Kalos, because I refuse to believe that was entirely of our own merit.

>>9440174
Oh there you are, yeah, why us?

>>9440116
>evens, he can
>it's a mile away, but it's on a hill, so it's easily visible

>>9440150
hiray

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>>9440102
Nah, the Distortion World isn't calling me yet, I've got work to do. Mostly convincing people like you that the old ways are absurd.

>>9440150
>Fragile ego still shattered
Why don't you come here, Kalos has been lost to degeneracy.

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>>9440116
INJURIES ARE MANLY! A TRUE MAN SHOULD BE COVERED IN SCARS FROM HEAD TO TOE!
>The hand is swatted away, "Kamina" choosing instead to get up on his own, sulking a bit over his loss.
Alright, where is it Mr Keikaku?

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>>9440174
No they are not. But I'm trying to get them out of Orre, and I'm not sure what will happen when that happens.

>>9440181
God Arceus has a plan for everyone.

>>9440213
But I am here.
I preach the word from central Kalos, near where my grandfather was struck down.
At least, my friend, the traitors-in-waiting have been expelled from our lands.
I wish to meet with you in person - the faith's tenets are simple, but I anticipate our discussion will not be well-suited to an open forum.

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>>9440196
>Ding.
>Thank you.
>>9440218
Yeah alright. Over there. The huge mansion on the hill.
>Leo gestures and starts walking.
Get your pokemon out, this is definitely going to be a battle.

>>9440277
>Dubfail.
>Leo trips on the same goddamn rock.
>At least he wears a goddamn shirt, rolling for how bruised up he is.

>>9440257
No you are not here, here being Kanto.

>>9440298
Ah, my apologies.
I am tired from a day of preaching to the benighted masses, and misread.
Perhaps it would help your mood if we were to collaborate on penning a sermon? Even in the depths of enemy territory, there are those who still fight.

>anon has technically won the staring contest
>however he's only won because the Salazzle decided to press her ass against the glass
>he's decidedly uncomfortable with this whole situation.

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>>9440277
>>9440292
>Snort and refrain from laughing.
>Pick the nerd up and toss him over your shoulder.
They're already out. Times'a waistin', let's go!
>Dash off in hopefully the right direction

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>>9440365
Where are we-? To the left you dunce, that's a cave.
>Pained groan.

>>9440336
Y-yeah, that will work!

"Listen maligned masses, for the era of man is coming!"

>>9440336
>>9440406
(What is even going on in this interaction? I can't even follow what these characters are doing. My keikakus.)

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>>9440177
For what reason did you buy a bunch of rugs?

>>9440406
Haha, yes!
"For too long have we elevated the creatures of the wild upon gilded pedestals! For too long have we turned a blind eye to depravity!"

>>9440105
People come and go I guess?

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>>9440250
I guess so, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to take down Team Flare alongside Calem.
It's funny, that whole thing almost made me think I wanted a relationship with Calem, stupid, thinking back, but eh, maybe a fling wouldn't have been so bad.
Not now of course, that dude has a maniacal sylveon.

>>9440444
( They're two stuck-up religious nutjobs and they're planning out Cultanon's next street sermon. )
( Also Cultanon might try to pull Malicious And/or Criminal Activity soon )

>Cultguy does what I've been trying to do forever.
>In like a week
(Man kms roll to die)

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>>9440460
Frankie said his feet were always cold
Because the floor's cold here
I wanted to do something nice
So I got rugs

>>9440512
(It's a RayTM plot. They always get a bunch of cushioning dude.)

>>9440469
"It is time for man to take his rightful position as dominator of nature!"
"No gods but the Human God!"

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>Sigh.
>Bust out the notepad.
>Take notes on the crazy cultist.

>>9440365
>>9440387
>anon just sits in front of the window, head in his hands
>this fucking lizard is trying to get as lewd as possible right in front of him
>if he wasn't scared of it trying to break in, he would have gone to a different room by now

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>>9440387
What? I can't hear you!
>Shift Leo into a bridal carry
Wanna repeat that, princess?

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>>9440490

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>>9440596
Ugh.
>Point.
>>9440577
There. Look. Right there.
Are you blind? Do you need glasses?

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>>9440490
Ah, youthful love between boy and girl.

>>9440406
>>9440469
You two are giving me a really bad vibe.

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>>9440610
Hey, we risked our lives together, what's the term called? Fire-forged friends or something like that. You go through shit like that with other people that you don't actively hate and sometimes you start thinking stupid things.

>>9440639
Not really, it was a passing fancy. I don't think he could keep up with me anymore regardless, I don't think Xerneas gave him the gift of never having to sleep.

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>>9440639
>>9440662

>>9440560
"We shall carry His will as our torch, and destroy the shadows that corrupt our blessed lands! His Will is our strength, His fury our sword, now and forever!"
Hahaha! It is such a delight to banter with another man of the faith. Perhaps when my kinsmen are ready, we can deliver His word with a personal touch? I'll keep you informed, friend.
>>9440639
Leniency is a sign of weakness, mechanic, and only the faithless question.

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>>9440529
Well that does seem nice but I can see why he'd be upset since you didn't ask first. Consider having him talk to somebody about having heated floors installed instead?

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>>9440696
IT WAS TWO YEARS AGO AND I LITERALLY NEVER BROUGHT IT UP UNTIL NOW!

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>>9440560
>>9440744
Remind me to stay out of buttfuck Kalos.

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>>9440696
I FEEL THERE IS A LESS HOSTILE WAY OF EXPRESSING A DESIRE TO REMAIN PLATONIC AS REGARDS THE OPPOSITE SEX, CALEM.
THAT SAID, IT IS A PLEASURE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

>>9440744
PERFECT!
I haven't felt this great in days, to finally find someone else of this zeal!
Do keep me informed, for Kanto has your back.

>>9440639
You are nothing but an heretic, begone!

>>9440767
Stay out of buttfuck Kalos.

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>>9440634
The only glasses I need are these ones, baby!
>Shift him to one arm and don the cosplay glasses as dramatically as possible
>>9440577
Gotcha, you skanky salamander!
Toxicroak, use Earthquake!
>The purple froge leaps forward from the cosplayer's side, sending forth shockwaves when he lands.

252 Atk Life Orb Toxicroak Earthquake vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Salazzle: 317-374 (273.2 - 322.4%) -- guaranteed OHKO

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>>9440765
I'm going to get very drunk now.
>>9440807
Hello again! How are you feeling today?
>>9440811
Do I have to send my Sylveon after you?

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>>9440767
He's just salty and crazy because his serial killer grandpa's dead, Des.
Don't sweat it, let the cops sort him out.

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>>9440662
Xer..neas? One of God-Arceus children? He had a special plan for you.

>>9440696
Yes?

>>9440744
>>9440811
I feel nothing but pity for you two, for you haven't experienced revelations.

>>9440807
Oh dear...

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>>9440821
Thank.
>>9440856
Up until we get shot in our sleep. How's the house going?

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>>9440831
I AM QUITE WELL, THANK YOU.
I HAVE BEEN ENJOYING THE BEAUTY OF THE MOUNTAIN PINES, AND KEEPING AN EYE ON MY DISCIPLES.
>>9440858
YES, MECHANIC. OH, DEER. HEH HEH.
I TRUST TODAY FINDS YOU WELL?

>>9440831
I fear no pokemon, for our status as humans make us inherently superior!

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>>9440884
Well, I have good news and bad news.
The good news is that it's still standing, it's still mine, and the place hasn't had the plumbing ripped out by fumeheads.
The bad news is that it's been broken into at least once, so we're going to have to do some minor repairs and replace appliances.

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>>9440767
It is not usually this full of crazies,stranger.

>>9440920
Yes, son of Arceus. Had one of my far and few free days, which I spent thinking about my life and spending it with Torque and Joule, my assistants.

>>9440811
I will. For now, my followers are to carry out His Will here, deep in these fallen lands.
>>9440858
I feel nothing but contempt for you, for your mind has wandered in dark places without His purpose.
>>9440856
Wha-
How dare you slander my grandfather!
Who are you!?

>>9440976
Stand in front of a hyper beam and say that.

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>>9440807
See? Even Xerneas agrees you could be a bit less rude.
And, hi deer.

>>9440811
...Oh jeez they're at it again, sometimes I wonder if Team Flare was right about the world being corrupt enough to need to wipe the slate clean. I need a drink.

>>9440831
Agreed.

>>9440858
I think it was an accident that he made it so I don't need sleep. Not that I mind.

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>>9440977
I have some leftover money and Kag can help with any extra repairs. About how much do we need in total?

>>9440827
>miss!
>since Kamina said perfect earlier I assume Toxicroak is also LV 40
>Lewd Lizard used Flame Burst!
>252 SpA Salazzle Flame Burst vs. 0 HP / 4 SpD Dry Skin Toxicroak: 76-91 (59.3 - 71%) -- guaranteed 2HKO

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>>9441034
I'm just a guy with an ear for rumors, kiddo.
>>9441065
Enough for a new microwave, floor cleaning, a couch, and new locks.
So, a fair bit but not a fortune.

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>Firecat decides to check online
>>9440976
PFFFFFT, dude I literally Fire Fang'd some guy's dick off a day or two ago, don't even TRY to say pokemon are inferior to humans.

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>>9441034
God-Arceus came to me and opened my eyes. I implore you to seek Him.

>>9441054
Must be real nice for the day to day life,could get my family out of Orre in less than a year.
Tell the truth, I have been too preachy now, haven't I?

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>>9440827
Greaaaaaat miss.
>>9441157
Scum. Keep it off of my Zoroark.
>Zoroark LV40 is sent out.
>Night Daze.
252 SpA Zoroark Night Daze vs. 0 HP / 4 SpD Salazzle: 84-99 (72.4 - 85.3%) -- guaranteed 2HKO

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>>9441157
(It's a level 40 Poison Touch Toxicroak, not gonna make you delet and rewrite, just letting you know for the next calc)
Who the hell do you think I am?! No frog of mine is gonna get taken down by a slutty Salamander!
>Toxicroak springs off the ground, landing with a loud boom.
252 Atk Life Orb Toxicroak Earthquake vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Salazzle: 317-374 (273.2 - 322.4%) -- guaranteed OHKO
>>9441215
I could say the same to you, nerd!

>>9441191
>>9441043
All empty words! The Faith protects me.

>>9441034
Region by region the world is cleansed. For now, farewell brother.

>>9441255
>Dubsfail
>Froggo gets the landing wrong and KO's itself
OH SHIT!
>He resists the urge to drop Leo and check on his froggy companion

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>>9441033
I AM PLEASED TO HEAR THIS.
I ASSUME TORQUE AND JOULE ARE ENJOYING THE TIME OFF AS WELL?
>>9441054
GOOD EVENING, SERENA.

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>>9441215
>another miss!

>>9441255
>CRITFAIL!

>Lewd Lizard used Flame Burst on Zoroark!
>252 SpA Salazzle Flame Burst vs. 0 HP / 4 SpD Zoroark: 66-78 (60 - 70.9%) -- guaranteed 2HKO

>anon runs outside, covering his nose with a handkerchief and checking out the situation!
IT'S NOT USING PHEROMONES YET, QUICKLY, GIVE ME A POKEBALL AND I WILL DEAL WITH IT!

>>9441263
They say Faith is the only shield you need.
I say get an actual goddamn shield if you don't want a hole in your chest.
The road you're going down? You better open a fuckin chain of shield stores.

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>>9441255
>>9441279
Fifty percent chance of hitting. 100% chance of a KO.
I'm going to risk the odds.
>>9441320
Alright then.
>Zoroark uses Hone Claws.
>Leo tosses him an Ultra Ball.
Please don't fuck your throw up.

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>>9441208
At this point I've got so much free time I don't know what to do with myself, it'd be nice if any of my pokemon could stay up with me, but unfortunately they can't.

>>9441301
You know where Yvetal is? I'd like to chat with the death bird.

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>>9441364
I hope for the same thing.
>He turns to the lewd lizard
SALAZZLE! I AM THE ONE YOU WANT, PAY ATTENTION TO ME!
>He winds up, and throws the Ultra Ball!

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>>9441399
>FUCKING CRITFAIL!
>HE LITERALLY MISSED SO HARD THE SALAZZLE COULDN'T EVEN JUMP FOR IT
...One more, I think it wishes to be captured.

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>>9441320
I'm not out of the fight yet, skank!
Greninja! Water Shuriken!
>0 and 2 hit two times, 4 hits three times, 6 hits four times, 8 hit five times.
252 SpA Life Orb Greninja Water Shuriken (15 BP) (3 hits) vs. 0 HP / 4 SpD Salazzle: 117-141 (100.8 - 121.5%) -- guaranteed OHKO
>>9441364
You can do it Leo! I believe in yo-
>>9441399
>>9441433
What the hell?! How could you fuck it up that badly?!!

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>>9441301
Torque spent the day recharging his core and spinning idly, Joule had a good day burning junk, and the subject of battles didn't come out.
In short, a good day.

>>9441375
You could always pick up a more hands on job, excessive idleness is a terrible thing.

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>>9441399
You are fucking garbage.
>Zoroark uses Night Slash.
>0 is a crit.
>1s hit due to Hone Claws.
+1 252 Atk Zoroark Night Slash vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Salazzle: 94-112 (81 - 96.5%) -- guaranteed 2HKO
>>9441433
>Toss another over.
>>9441486
Well. Good job.

>>9441486
(Four hits, here's the actual calc)
252 SpA Life Orb Greninja Water Shuriken (15 BP) (4 hits) vs. 0 HP / 4 SpD Salazzle: 156-188 (134.4 - 162%) -- guaranteed OHKO

>>9441166
Lies. You know more than you say, stranger. Watch your back.
>>9441208
The faithful have no room for doubt.
>>9441263
Fare well, and walk in His light.

I am off. My brothers and sisters need me.
>Cultanon: rolling to get a lead on any Pokephiles in the area.

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>>9441166
Yeah I can get my hands on that. Give me a little bit.

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>>9441542
Take your time, we're not rolling out for at least another few days. One of us still needs to stay here until Seb's healthy enough to travel.
Ray's got the old cardboard shop-front going, trying to earn some extra dosh. I'm hoping that goes well.

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>>9441486
I overshot was all! I'm not used to throwing these things!

>>9441509
...I'll just use it when the lizard wakes up, thank you. Come on in.

>He scoops up the lewd lizard wife style and brings her inside, putting her on the couch

Do you two need anything? A drink, food? I'm afraid I can't really revive the Toxicroak, but I have plenty of beds.

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>Meanwhile, a mole is trying to earn extra money in the gardening business
>Last two digits x last digit post above x 100

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>>9441375
I CAN ATTEMPT TO CONTACT HIM, THOUGH I MAKE NO PROMISES.
>>9441494
I AM GLAD OF THIS.