ITT: Pokemon are real. What pokemon would you give a mega e

>>9003121
Ninetales

>>9003121
Zangoose

>>9003121
my mom

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>>9003121
Guess.

>>9003049
Now it's been One Week.

>>9003087
>you missed
>how do you fail to grope yourself
Yes.

>>9003121
Torterra

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>>9003121
Stoutland.

>>9003055
>Notepad out
>Two possible persons known as Radioman, if not more
Would it be Seb the one who ranted last night?
>He seems to have evaded the reason of the investigation

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>>9003121
I do not have one,
Per se, there's a different form.
Alas, it's not great.

>>9002928
I'm afraid he's not,
Yet he still has some answers,
If you'd like to ask.

>>9003055
Good evening, old friend.
It's been too long, I must say.
Since we've had a talk.

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>>9003087
All's fair in groping wars!
>Spark runs a gloved finger along the crack on the stone
>>9003154
But what'd I give for Just One Yesterday.
>>9003121
Pidgey!!

>>9003055
>>9003181
>Something can be overheard in a room nearby
>rho max range
>...
>theta 270
>...
>phi 10

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>>9003121
Well.. Stitch already has one, so, Marowaks.

>>9003055
Hmm.
Water would be good.
>Gooey is loosely and casually wearing her assault vest, which has an IP badge pinned to it
I was gonna ask some questions about the...radio rant last night, if you don't mind.

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>>9003154
you suck
>attempt to smack
>>9003228
>lewd moan
more

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>>9003248
(Drink)

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>>9003181
That would be him.
I was the voice doing all the swearing, but I assume that fines for on-air profanity aren't the purpose of the visit.
>>9003248
>John grabs water for everybody, and relaxes a bit.
Alright, shoot.

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>>9003228
Sounds like you're talking about the 21st Century.

>>9003258
STOP HITTING ME.
AND FINGERING ME.
NOT IN THAT ORDER.

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Goodnight.

Flaa~ Flaa~

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>>9003186
>Notepad out
>Scratch last entry
>Radioman = Seb
>Kanabo,Gooey = Ex-Catalyst (?)
I will just need a few words with him.

>>9003268
They are not, and profanity laws don't cover late night programs.
>Sip water
I hope it's filtered.
>Huxley the Absol seems oddly calm

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>>9003248
>>9003268
I know about that! A birdie told me it had to do with Nihilegos and Type: Fulls!

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>>9003178
I'm happy...
>smooch
>gets closer to the fluffy back and stsrts getting comfortable to sleep
Soory
Tired, but you comfortable to sleep
>starts getting sleepy

>>9003281
>Attempt to finger a rock who may or may not be named Freddy

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>>9003281
Nope, I'm talking about some past Centuries. Only Immortals will remember 'em.
>>9003258
Ooookay. Sounds like I'm winning~
>The finger trails back up the crack, Spark's thumb rubbing at one of the dots

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>>9003268
Alright...
First, were UB stings involved?
And second, was there any truth to the mention of "world changing" events?

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>>9003329
He's a little under the weather - last night took a lot out of him, I was cleaning up for a while.
And yeah, water's filtered.
>>9003330
>when you fifteen minutes into Investigation and Chill and he gives you that look

>>9003341
(Wrong image)
(Oh well)

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>>9003330
Hello???
Yes??
Someone say "Full"??
Anomalesia is needed??

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>>9003391
The wishening!
>>9003394
You going to pipe me? I heard that one on the wire!

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>>9003391
Wait...
...that's new to me.
>Important note: Warn Anabel ASAP

>>9003394
I knew that, I don't taste the fluoride.
What exactly happened last night?

>>9003433
And who is this?

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>>9003281
NO
FIGHT ME
ILL KILL YOU
>>9003370
>very lewd rock noises
hhh
>attempt to lewdly touch face or something

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>>9003354
>rock: is not Freddy
>got fingered anyway
>lewd stone sounds

>>9003370
Heaven Help Us. Sounds like you've got Time on your side. Surprised you aren't Dead.

AND STOP MOLESTING US

>>9003500
WE'RE ALREADY DEAD
AND THE SAME PERSON

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>>9003485
Hello???
Yes??
Don't know you!
I am Type Full!!
Named Anomalesia!!
Named by friend N!!!
It's a flower!!!

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>>9003391
>>9003394
>>9003485
>The studio door opens
>Out comes Seb, closely followed by a Magnezone and a Claydol
>He's clutching his pokedex
Hello Gooey and Kanabo, welcome officer.
I'm Sebastian, the other radio host here.

>>9003533
Why not.
>Roll to harvest lime goo from the holo rock

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>>9003433
Hey there, Anomalesia. Is Seb okay?
>>9003468
No I'm not. Please leave, though.
>>9003485
>>9003391
>John pauses, considering his options.
Yeah. One breached the station and stung Seb before encountering sufficient resistance to force its retreat. That kicked off the rant.
As for world-changing events, I neither confirm nor deny the veracity of my colleague's claims.
>>9003549
You doing alright, Seb? That bite healing up alright?

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>>9003549
And you're looking for a certain special something!
I see Ray doesn't want me here so!
>>9003581
Pipe!
>Sky attack self into wall.
>Break neck.

>>9003581
>telling people to leave
why are you fucking like this
why dont you leave

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>>9003533
He started it!
>>9003500
>Face: touched lewdly
Soooo.... am I winning?
>Two fingers now, one on each side of the crack, occasionally touching the edges while his thumb lazily rubs circles on the dot

>>9003622
>This old meme
(Stop)

>>9003622
whoever it was in discord should kill themself tbhh

>>9003650
>>9003652
(Telling people to leave and being hostile is what's killing this thread.)

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>>9003549
Hello.
>Wave
How are you feeling?

>>9003581
Alright. So, UBs were involved.
...
By chance...is it related to a certain group of Pokemon? That were forgotten by the masses for their own protection?

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>>9003533
>grope self again
>>9003642
>lewd rock noise
hhh nooo?
>stick hand/tendrill in mouth

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>>9003565
>miss'd
AAA! No, go for the purple! He's into that!

>>9003642
I don't care who started it I'm end-
>more lewd rock sounds
>what are lewd rock sounds?
>idk but that rock is making them

>>9003727
WHY

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>>9003591
>Azoth: Chew on corpse.
>Roll to not get feathers and blood everywhere.

>>9003740
But I like lime more than grape!
>Roll to licc the poor holorocc

>>9003341
>the shelmet starts sleeping i the flaafy's fur
>the pokemon gas a peaceful smile
>if he had hands he would bu hugging her right now
(Sorry i'm really tired right now, i'm actually going to sleep)
-shelmet

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>>9003581
>UB stings -> psychological effects
>Possible method for information extraction

>>9003549
>Make note of existing relationships
My pleasure.
I believe you mentioned world changing events last night, of which I am really interested in knowing.

>>9003536
Uh...
>Pull out a pokedex
>It's an old model, yet it doesn't seem like it was used much
>"Error, unknown species"
What in the hell...

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>>9003764
It can be eat??
>Grab bird head in mouth
>CRUNCH
>There's definitely a mess
>>9003581
>Look up from crunched bird head
Yes?
Think so!!
Says he's okay!!

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>>9003820
>Auto update, you have failed me
>Bwarr excitedly
>Roll for if gore gets on the IP guy
Am a special doggo!!!
Made to fight UBs!!
KILL UBs!!

>ray chases off another poster

>>9003863
>except they were in the discord so not really

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>>9003581
It could have been much worse, knowing Anomalesia. But I'm fine, thanks.
Sorry about the bad morning.

>>9003715
I don't feel like puking my guts out currently. The sting still hurts like hell though.
>Ignore the question

>>9003820
I'm afraid I did.

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>>9003740
You're what now?
>>9003727
Mhmm, if you say a-
>That's a tendril in his mouth
>He runs his tongue along the underside, rubbing the rough edges of the stone crack with a finger

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>>9003822
>Blood and brain matter all over doggo.
AA!!
DIRTY!!!
GOODRA PHEROMONES!!!
I DON"T WANT THE ZANGOOSE!!!
>Licc at fur, panicked.

>>9003715
That's a very interesting statement there.
They weren't related to the UB incident, but the alleged world-changing event...
Well, you've done your homework. No sense denying their involvement in that one.
>>9003820
I'm familiar with said events.
As for your Pokedex, it'll go funny on you with the odd doggos. that's a story in and of itself, but let's take one thing at a time.
>>9003881
Alright. Good to hear, I'll fish something up for the sting after our chat.

>>9003622
( 1. Random lots-of-meta-knowledge character during Real Plot Hours: not cool. 2. That was an IC "Leave the station" for a OOC "leave the thread". )

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>>9003740
BECAUSE
>grope
>>9003788
HEY
>SUCKER PUNCH THE ANON
PAY ATTENTION TO ME
>>9003908
>lewd moans
>pull tendrill out
sss you win

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>>9003822
>>9003860
>>9003913
>Concerned looks from the Absol and the Stoutland
Huxley, the Absol: Are you reliving a past disaster?

>>9003930
(Next you're gonna tell Gladi to fuck off for having fun.)

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>>9003930
( I did it again, in my defense shit's a little real irl rn )
>>9003913
Easy, easy!
It's okay!
The Zangoose is dead, he's not gonna hurt you.
You're not gonna get screwy off pheromones, either, it's safe.
>Attempt to soothe odd doggo with pets
>>9003967
It seems so. We've had a few of those.

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>>9003788
>rock: licc'd
...Slimy.

>>9003908
I.. lost my train of thought give me a second here

>>9003943
PRETTY SURE THAT'S TECHNICALLY MASTURBATION

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>>9003967
UBS BAD!!!
HAVE TO SLAY UBS!!
BE A GOOD NULL!
STRONG NULL GETS LET OUT OF THE BALL!!
>>9003913
It's okay friend!!!
Anomalesia help!!!
>Help lick the friend clean

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>>9003930
I spent some time traveling with the mentioned pokemon, and learned about most of it. You probably know that.
But I didn't mention it to other individuals outside of here, for their own safety.

>>9003881
So...what exactly did you say last night?
Just curious.

>>9003913
>Look over
Uh...

>>9003943
Fine fine, no need to get violent Grapinator.
>Licc the grape bits too

>>9003990
Indeed.

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>>9003881
Describe the so called world changing events, and why did you described them as "public knowledge" before the rant ended.

>>9003930
>>9003984
>More notes
>Divine conspiracy -> Mass amnesia related to repeated global event
>Divine conspiracy -> The Forgotten (???????)
>Oddoggo -> Undiscovered pokemon species

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>>9003967
>>9003984
>>9004024
>>9004030
>Doggo: Notice goodra.
>Hide under desk and mumble about hot tubs.

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>>9003943
Sweet.
>He pauses in his running, just circling the dot now
Do you want me to keep going or...
>>9003990
Take your time.

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>>9003913
>Pet the odd doggo despite the gore
Hah, lively as usual.

>>9003930
Well, guess there's not much to hide anymore, except the names.

>>9003967
Trust me, there's a disaster close at least once a week.

>>9004030
Just my own opinions about society.

>>9004062
A few questions first, have you ever been... not an human? Some time in the last four months? Up to three or four times?

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>>9003881
Ah, Radioman.
Good to see that you are well.
I was worried, friend.

>Froggo: just lean back.
>Sip a drink, and listen in.
>This is calm, so car.

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>>9003990
so?
>lewdly touch the rocc
>>9004056
>lewd moans
yessss
>>9004125
hhh
nooooooo
i should
sleep

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>Hand out fliers detailing what happened with the Farsail crew.
>Rolling for them not to be too unreadable...

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>>9004090
>Concerned and confused look
>Also, how does the massive doggo fit under the desk?
You okay...?
What's wrong?

>>9004141
Tell me more about these opinions.

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>>9004056
>lime bits: still getting lewdlicc
>still slime'd

>>9004125
>non-spooky moaning

>>9004169
FOR FUCKS SAKE
>rock falls over
>hologram is now at a funky angle
>non-spooky moan.mp3 continues

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>>9004208
i mean yeah i was there
why tho

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>>9004141
For the broad picture, you're right.
The details might be a little problematic - if memory serves, you called that merry band out for being the world's worst wannabes at what their then-leader's aims were.
>>9004090
It's okay. It's okay.
No more hot tubs, no more Zangoose, no more Lucario either.
>>9004062
Long, long story, but the odd doggos are fairly unique.
>>9004225
Bad experience involving concentrated pheromone exposure and other crew.

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>>9004141
Hello???
Yes??
Why not pet Anomalesia?
>>9004090
Friend??
Not doing good at hiding...
Here, Anomalesia will help!!
>Attempt to do the chicken thing and hide Azoth under himself
>>9004225
>They don't
>Azoth is apparently up against it with just his tail under the desk

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>>9004244
Welcome to the world of the living.
How do you feel about moving into a castle?

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>>9004244
I knew it was real!! Give me the full story I need more proof!

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>>9004273
castles are sick
i wanted aether paradise to be a castle
wait
we have a castle?
>>9004279
dude i barely remember
people died
you like
pretty much have it in this pamphlet
arent you supposed to be with frankie

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>>9004169
How does a rock sleep?
>>9004231
What do you think? Keep going or stop?

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>>9004141
I was a Kadabra at least once. A friendly psychic pokemon helped me remember that.
I don't want to talk about other similar events, but you speak of them as if they already happened.

>>9004144
>Notes
>Radioman -> Seb (Confirmed)

>>9004225
I want to know as well, to paint a more detailed picture of the puzzle.

>>9004248
>Oddoggo -> Multiple of
>More notes
>Ignore the anecdotes about wild parties, they are not relevant

>>9004311
wrong muk fucktard

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>>9004311
Frankies asleep
That muk's not with us sorry sir
>>9004273
we're pretty much there sir
wait is it your majesty because of the castle?
>>9004349
( pls stahp )

>>9004169
>>9004231
>Time to get Lewd.avi
>Kiss the rocc(s)
>With tongue

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>>9004311
Thank you!
>Run off to publish it.

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>>9004311
Yes? The castle where the old Unova league was?
>Chuckle
Gladion? That's the wrong Muk.
>Hey dude how's it going
>>9004349
>Roll to tamp the anon
>>9004357
You can call me that.

>>9004357
(Ray don't reply to shitters)
(Out of all people I shouldn't tell you that)

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>>9004349
>>9004357
>>9004378
fuck
>>9004379
>terrible already
>got characters confused
>whoops
whyd you put a castle under the league anyway

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>>9004326
Look, sir, I just w-

>>9004365
blurgalgufmmmm

>>9004349
>Roll to give anon some blunt force trauma

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>>9004248
And rightfully so. At least they were entertaining and there was plenty of physical space in between.

>>9004225
Let me put it bluntly, I grew tired of pokemon and human inequalities.

>>9004344
What if I told you that happened four times, of which the one was made to have never existed and the other merely temporary?
I'm not sure how far the second to fourth event span, but I was affected in all the secondary events as well.
Either way, they're not the kind of events that can be easily hidden, hell, even that rag Krickefeed wrote about it!

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>>9004248
That sounds rough.
Also, I remember their...leader.
He was a terrible person, and gave me creepy stares whenever I walked by him.
The rest of the crew were pretty good people, from what I know.

>>9004252
...
Uh...

>>9004344
It's a puzzle with several pieces.

>more fucking digging up of the farsail grave
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh
let it fucking rest

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>>9004433
At least one member of that group's loyalty was based on deception concerning who caused the event in question, and resents the now-dead leader for lying to him. Also for other misconduct, but that's another story.
>>9004431
Hell yeah. I'm pleasantly surprised so many members of the old crew survived to fade off into the sunset.
>>9004344
Hmm - that's not the sort of thing the average psych would know to look for. Mind if I ask who helped you out?

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>>9004252
>Get close
>Reassuring pat

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>>9004408
>Shit
>Roll for the hug
>Fuck you dice, if I can't fite for the boyfuriendo's honor at least lemme hug him
Ghetsis' explanation for the League castle was fairly odd... I believe he said something about grandstanding and showing Plasma's magnificence. I try to forget conversations with him.

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>>9004514
dont worry ill publish my book on it soon
sucks to be you nerd
>>9004525
>fucking
>kill me todays been all bad choices
>you tried
>roll to hug
...ok
so
castle time then? can we put rave lights everywhere

>>9004561
dont encourage them retard

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>>9004578
dude
you wanna like, fuck off?
you aren't helping.

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>>9004431
>Notes
>Sebastian -> Radicalized (?)
>Memo to self: check old Krickefeed articles
And how does this relate to the mass amnesia?

>>9004433
I need to find out all the pieces, and put them into their place.

>>9004515
A weird Raichu off Nacrene, yesterday. Odd not because he was not the standard Raichu variant but because of his behavior, he seemed more human than pokemon.

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>>9004561
>but Gladi if I kill you the gay snuggles will never happen
>gdi the height difference is too much
>at least the fry is appearing in the anime
Wellll. I'm not sure we have enough lights for the entire castle, but you can put them in the room. When do you want to head out? I believe we can "borrow" Colress' warp pad.
>>9004578
(Hey shit stain, do me a fucking favor and eat a bullet first fucking chance you get.)

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>>9004515
I'm sure the remaining members will live happy lives.
I think it's best that it stays buried, honestly.

>>9004431
Oh yeah.
Any recent developments on the Pokemon rights situation?

>>9004605
Well...if you want to know, I'm.not going to stop you.
And I think I'm friends with that Raichu, if I'm thinking of the right one.

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>>9004605
>John's jaw drops.
Holy shit.
Ray's in town.
>He beams.
I gotta get him over here, I've missed that little goof ever since we split up at Fallarbor.
Long story short, the event he helped you remember was temporary for the vast majority of the population. For a few though, it didn't wear off. Thus, Ray.

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>>9004433
He was a terrible person with terrible ideas, be thankful he only gave you creepy stares.

>>9004515
If only he gave proper respect for the dead he would have made a proper case for himself. Oh well.
And yeah, guess that in the end, the good people had their good ending.

>>9004605
I'm answering for one reason and one reason only: you don't seem to be in official IP business.
Either way, they caused the first and undone world changing event. But not the other three.

>>9004631
>>9004590
(Stop giving them (You)s)

last two post numbers is how many times i slice my arm open

>>9004751
hell yeah

>>9004751
>>9004771
do not

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>>9004711
That is curious.
How one could survive as such,
Endure... such drastic change.
>>9004724
We're not on the books.
This visit, part health checkup,
Part personal business.

>>9004782
(It's not turts)
(Just a shitter)

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>>9004705
Not many, things are going slow. Too slow.

>>9004711
Guess we're having a good old family reunion!

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>>9004433
>>9004515
>More scribbling
>The Forgotten -> Dead leader (confirmed) -> Usurped/Usurper (?)
>The Forgotten -> Scattered away

>>9004705
>>9004711
>>9004831
I guess he is a friend of you?

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hello
advice
how do i get rainbow out of goo

>>9004865
G
O
O

>>9004865
Try bleach?
I'm no janitor but, that might help.

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>>9004831
Well, that's unfortunate.
I hope things pick up soon.

>>9004848
Yeah.
Really nice guy.

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>>9004884
i am goo
>>9004894
didnt help
i tried leaving alola and it didnt help either

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>>9004831
Hell yeah!
Getting the band back together. I promise I won't play percussion.
>Chuckle.
>>9004848
He's my brother.
>John peeks at the notebook.
The Zangoose was the lead fucker, also a Wishening subject.
What got him to lose power is when we joined up with Plasma and had actual leadership instead of, well, him.
>>9004896
I've been giving standing orders to grunts, mostly. Got a guy or two looking into some disappearance in Kalos, but that's about as crazy as things get right now.

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>>9005047
Well... Alright.
>Gooey yawns
I'm really tired...
Think I'll take a short nap
>Curls up on the couch, and passes out

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>>9004896
He seemed like a really good pokemon.

>>9005047
...what?
>Very fast scribbling
>Divine Conspiracy -> The Forgotten -> Ray (former human) (Plasma -> Catalyst)
>Divine Conspiracy -> The Forgotten -> Anonymous Zangoose (former human, dead) (interim leader)
Does that make you one of them? Or Seb?

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>>9005047
>Laugh
Hopefully never again!
And uh, guess I missed on something important that needed grunts on the field.

>>9005164
I was not, but I followed them close enough to not forget... at least not irreversibly.

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>>9005164
Well, gig's up.
I joined them on Alola, shortly after Ray did.
I like to think we were the voices of reason, despite me bailing the group out once or twice through unreasonable behavior.
We made a whole lot of enemies, though, culminating in some very special problems express-delivered to Sinnoh by Lusamine's Aether. Shortly after that, people forgot. We wandered a bit, joined Plasma more or less as a group for a while, and then went our separate ways.
>>9005208
Yeah, somehow you got cameras covering damn near every inch of every transport we grabbed.
I'd crack a joke about favors done for Palkia, but that might be in poor taste.
>>9005141
>Throw blanket over slugdragon

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>>9005291
>>9005208
Huh, Alola and Sinnoh.
This matches with a few other recovered memories.
>The Forgotten -> John (Confirmed)
>The Forgotten -> Sebastian (Not close enough)
>The Forgotten -> Unknown Alola event -> Alolan Psycho (Unconfirmed???????)
>The Forgotten -> Aether's superweapon over Sinnoh -> Divine Conspiracy -> Mass Amnesia
...
Close...
>Still, more notes
>Sebastian -> Cameras -> Close follower at a distance -> The Forgotten (Yet not)
>Palkia -> Divine Conspiracy (?)
...I have finished the puzzle.

>>9005141
>Mental note: tell Anabel to retrieve Gooey

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>>9005291
Some day Palkia is going to cash in the favor, and if I return, I will never be the same again.
Speaking of enemies, there's still one thing that bother me, that went never finished, and also the reason why I have Panoptes here close:

>>9005416
Are you aware of rogue IP agents?

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>>9005479
>Drop notepad
I'm not sure what you're talking about?
>Huxley: up the tension

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>>9005416
Well, it's finished and I don't see shiny bracelets.
That's reassuring.
It feels good to have the secret off my chest and not be dead for it.
>>9005479
Well, it probably won't be too bad a favor seeing as the whole thing was good for a cosmic joke.
I would like to know about that question too.

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alright
>the muk sings something to itself

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>>9005520
Rogue IP agents, with their own agendas and ends. I've had bad runs with them, once listing me along with my friends for assassination... after the mindwipe. Another time when a bunch of completely substandard IP agents attempted to storm an abandoned oil rig off Alola to destroy it and pin it on a group of pokemon isolationists. What do you know?

>>9005556
>pet goo

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>>9005520
( doh, missed this post. )
IP officers carrying out off-the-books missions - specifically violent ones rather than informal information-gathering such as our meeting here.
>>9005599
Don't forget that Thorpe had a little confrontation with the local offices over that little list.

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>>9005528
>John -> Unknown event/crime (???)
>Don't prosecute

>>9005599
If there were any dossiers on you or your friends I would have read them already and not have asked this many questions. And I'm not aware of any rogues, the story at the time is that they were terrorists that stole IP uniforms.

>Huxley: ready to attack Panoptes

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>>9005602
>goo is surprised
hello
>pat friend
how are you

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>>9005635
>Telepathic message from Panoptes to Scott
>"Tell the Absol self that my self is not going to strike"

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>>9005618
I remember that, but not much, I holed myself in my office in the basement while it all blew over.
I was already down on my luck, and I wasn't going to make it worse by being cannon fodder.
Guess they really were terrorists, just not with stolen uniforms.

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>>9005709
Yeah. I'm sorry that things came to that, by the way. Some good people got caught in between a rock and a hard place.
>General tension: noted.
Any other questions I can help answer, while we're here?

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>>9005709
>>9005635
Acceptable answers.
>Pocket up the pokedex
>Tell Panoptes that emergency procedures are no longer in effect
If these dossiers were to resurface I'd like if they were immediately destroyed.
Any more questions?

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>Skarmory, 77 and 33 are all sleeping in a pile in a cave somewhere under Mt. Battle.
>Imagine this pic with two Cipher grunts, one in the full Cipher armor instead of the chick.
>Music is quietly playing in sleeping 77's headphones.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2D1fIuUToKY

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>>9005760
There was a conspiracy right under my nose and I never noticed it, it is me that should be sorry.

>>9005767
No more questions for tonight. Thanks for giving my mind some clarity.
If you need me, contact the office -1 in the Castelia IP HQ. But for now, farewell.

>Huxley, Scott follow
>Huxley calmed down
>Scott seems sad at not being able to play more with the bigger doggo

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>>9005871
Feel free to swing by whenever, friend.
We're probably going to go lights-out for the evening. Take care.

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>>9005871
See you soon.

>Gooey asleep in the couch
>Kanabo probably also asleep somewhere nearby
Well, that's a way to repair relations with the IP.

i love you guys so much

>>9006508
you're pretty cool too, anon.

>>9006699
Indeed.

I want smoochbug to sexually smooch me

i wamt to smooch a ghost

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>>9008982
Anon...
Here...
>smooch

I want to date anabel

>>9008546
Smoochbug is pure

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Last night was weird. A-MEW-sing, but weird.

>>9010025
>Chuckles isn't around to help make the joke a little relevant and a bit funnier
Try again friend

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>>9010155
>It's an IC joke, Spark doesn't even know Mew is real
What, you want me to RAICHU some more jokes?

>>9010287
No, it gives me a headache

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>>9010025
Hell yeah. My bros, like, DEINO better than anybody about weird.
Can I AXEW a question about, like, what kind of weird it was, bro?

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>>9010299
You're such a spoil sport! Fine, I'll SEEL up my joke vault for now.
>>9010365
This guy gets it! So, I was SEAKING a wild Pidgey for research, right? And I come across this rock. Talking ghost rock. I save an anon from the ghost rock by picking it up and taking it with me.
And then it gropes me.
So I grope it back.
Things escalate and... long story short I almost fingerbanged a rock.

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>>9010426
Well, that was ONIX-pected.
I didn't think 'chu were the type to, like, go for something as GASTLY as ghost sex. Kidding, bro, no judgement.
It was, like, a MINIOR thing, not something to freak out about.

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>>9010454
It was pretty weird, not gonna lie. One of them was kinda KRABBY about the whole thing, the other spirit was kinda... CHANCEY to deal with.
It started it though, and I won that grope fight. Here's to hopin' the green part doesn't choke or curse me in my sleep.

>>9010640
i'm glad you did not do it
killing yourself isn't the way to go
and you have us here
and if no one is going to listen i will

i want to become a ghosts sex slave!

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>>9010564
Sweet, bro.
>>9010881
Uhhh... Like, what the heck.
I'm gonna try to, like, head out for a bit, I guess. Meet up with friends.
>Ray: peace out

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>>9010881
sex... slave...?

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>>9010881
a sex what???

>>9010881
Go to Orre.
There's a castle full of ghosts there.

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>>9005836
>33 groggily pulls himself out of the pile while avoiding waking the other two.
>He notes the still equipped snag machine on his arm.
>He quietly sneaks out of the cave.
>Releases the jelly and jellyports off to a pizza place.
>And he's back before 77 would even notice, now with a fresh pizza.
Hey, 77, you like pepperoni, right?

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>>9011844
>77 wakes up, roll to see how terrible he feels after sleeping in his armor.
>77 wearily looks over at 33, still lying down next to the sleeping steel bird.
Uhh...yeah, wh...oh. When did you get pizza?

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>>9012002
Just now, dude.
>He grabs a slice with the non-expensive equipment hand and hands it over.
Did you sleep alright?

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>>9012062
Oh.
Well, thanks man.
I slept pretty well yeah, this armor is surprisingly comfortable.
>77 grabs a the offered pizza slice and takes a bite.
So what now, want to get that thing dropped off back at base and get our reward?
I'm thinking we'd better get something good for getting a snag machine.

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hello... anyone... here?

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>>9012240
hello!!
who are you?

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>>9012230
Yeah, how about we do that now before some other recon grunt sees us and thinks we flipped sides?
>33 grabs a slice of pizza and munches it.
>33 grabs a hand towel and cleans his hands off.
You can finish it up, let me get my armor on.
>He unpacks his armor from his backpack, putting it on.

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>>9012240
>Solsquint.
>...Hello,..I...am...here...

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>>9012292
hello..
name... not identified... only known... as Z
who... are you... mister...?
>>9012374
hello... mister... rock

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>>9012344
Yeah, good plan.
>77 wakes up Skarmory and shares the rest of the pizza with the steel bird.
Man, you put that on fast, we only just barely finished the pizza.
You ready to go?
>77 hops onto the metal bird.
>Skarmory tilts his head at 33.

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>>9012388
oh!! my friends call me creech
hello nice to meet you z are you lost???

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>>9012388
>...I...am...Centauri...
>...Who...are...you..?

>>9012468
>...Hello...to...you,..too...

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>>9012455
Easy to do when you don't have to put the arm stuff on.
>33 leaves the stuff for his left arm in the bag.
>33 hops onto the metal bird.
If we don't get a promotion I'm so defecting.

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>>9012468
hello... creech
you... seem nice
but... memory... blurry... can't remember....
>>9012500
only Z... comes to mind
maybe... that's... my name

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>>9012500
hello sun rock!
how are you??
>>9012556
oooh you cant remember
do you need help?? maybe people here can help??
i dont think i can help
i am on a boat going to unova right now
i think unova people can help me

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>>9012512
>Skarmory screeches in agreement.
Abso-fucking-lutely.
Alright, hold on.
>Takeoff procedure engaged.
>Flight music: on.
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkSeSjwppw4
>Metal bird runs out of the cave and flaps his steel wings, taking off while carrying the two Cipher grunts.
>A while later Skarmory touches down outside the Cipher Key Lair.
Alright, you ready dude?

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>>9012556
>...Ah...I...see...
>...Then...I...shall...call...you...Z...

>>9012585
>Solsquint.
>...Hello,..I...am...well...
>...How...are...you..?

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>>9012605
>33 hops off the bird.
Absolutely. Here.
>He hands 77 the blueprints.
Let's go see what we can get, dude.
>He heads on into the Key Lair.

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>>9012585
what is... wrong mister?
can... i help?
>>9012705
Z... is... good

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>>9012705
i am okay!!
>>9012838
i asked the humans about not being this color
and nothing they say works
and i even left alola!!
im going to see if unova has anything!!
can you help with that???

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>>9012725
>77 studies the blueprints while still sitting on the metal bird's back, trying to make sense of it while Skarmory follows 33.
It's gonna be something cool, I fucking know it.
>Turn on radio.
>"Hey, AY-77 here. I've got AY-33 with me, we've got something that will make you love us."

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>>9012859
i can't... help... you..
but... i like... how you... look...
it's.. nice...
>poke creech
he... he...

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>>9012876
Hell yeah it will.
>He waits in the lobby area for the Admins reply.
This is going to be really cool.

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>>9012876
>>9013032
>As 33 and 77 are waiting in the lobby area a metal door slides open.
>A large man walks out, flanked by a couple of Cipher grunts wearing their armor.
You two.
I have heard you have something important for me?

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>>9012966
oh! you got here fast hello
did the rock leave?
thank you thank you!!
are you going to unova???

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>>9013147
tracked.. signal...
it's... easy...
need... any help?
have... nowhere... to go...
unova... seems nice...
can... i... come... with you?

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>>9013138
Uh, yeah.
33 and I managed to steal a snag machine and some blueprints to make more from that lab that researches purification or whatever.

We were wondering if we could get a reward or something.

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>>9013240
sure!!! more the merrier or whatever they say!!
if unova people cant help im not sure where i will go...
>the boat pulls into port
>creech tugs on the golett a bit
lets get going this is castelia

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>>9013138
>33 shows his snag machine off.
>>9013296
>He lets the master of charisma, 77, do the talking.

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>>9013300
>Z politely and obediently follows creech
Why...
Why don't... you like... how you look?
I like... how you... look

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>>9013296
>>9013314
>The two Cipher grunts lose their cool almost immediately as they either notice the snag machine on 33's arm or hear 77 mention what they did.
>Dakim looks impressed.
Hmm.
Did you manage to also collect the blueprints for the snag machine?
It would be very useful to be able to create more, very useful indeed.

Regardless you will get your rewards for this, if you do not have the blueprints we can simply have some researchers and engineers reverse engineer the one AY-33 is wearing.

>Dakim gets out his PDA and taps various buttons.
You two now have access to the base's armory. We don't have much in there any more but you may pick a weapon from there.
Additionally, AY-77. Your reports show you still only have that Skarmory.
If you like you can pick another Shadow Pokemon from here.

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>>9013390
i make people sick and
oh i touched you
>goo groan
>rolling for if he has any antidotes

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>>9013510
>confused
what... is wrong... creech?
>roll if he is poisoned or not

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>>9013314
>Skarmory makes a quiet metal bird noise at 33.

>>9013490
Yeah we did.
>77 hands over the blueprints to Dakim.
I'll uh, see what other Shadow Pokemon are around here. I know there were a few that escaped.
Speaking of which, I assume we're going to be sent out to capture them again, right?

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>>9013490
77 has the blueprints, sir.
>He nods at the mention of the armory.
Any assignments, sir?
>>9013641
>Pet the metal birb.

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>>9013595
>he pulls a few antidotes out of a plastic bag
>he applies one to Z
um
please please dont let me touch you
its bad

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>>9013723
okay... i'll try... not to... let you touch... me
but... can't promise... that i try to touch.. you
the... first time... nothing happened

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>>9013769
i don't know why that even happens!!
>he grumbles
lets go to the sewage place
>he instinctively goes to grab Z
>heasitates, before bringing his arm back
>and heads off

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>>9013641
>>9013697
Good, very good.
>Dakim takes the blueprints and immediately passes them to a nearby grunt, who runs off back down the hallway behind him shouting about how he has the blueprints for the snag machine.

Now, once you have gathered appropriate equipment I need you both to go hunting down any escaped Shadow Pokemon. You will both receive a message on your PDAs telling you what ones have escaped and where we think they are.
After that you are to capture any Pokemon you deem useful to us.
Now go.
>And with that, Dakim and the two now very excited grunts walk back through to where they came from, the metal door sliding shut behind them.

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>>9013834
>follows creech just behind him
well... maybe we can... find why...
i hope... you can stay... how you look... it's pretty

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>>9013871
Yes sir!

>>9013697
Dude this is fucking great.
Wanna go raid the armory?
>Metal bird screeching.
I said the armory, not the Skarmory, calm down.
>77 pets the steel bird head.

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You know what?
I want to try something.
What's a nice, but small town?

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>>9013871
Yes, sir.
>>9014030
Hell fucking yes, dude.
>33 laughs.
We can raid the Skarmory too, let's go.
>33 heads off to check out the armory.

>>9014087
New Bark Town's pretty friendly.
Small town feel, not much League activity out that way.

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>>9014001
i... dont know what i want
>they arrive
um... i dont think itll take long?
stay out here, you can use my dex
>he hands it over
>and heads off into the building
>>9014087
sandgem town? odale town?

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>>9014144
Looked it up.
Seems like a quiet little place.

>>9014153
Those don't look bad either.
...
I'm gonna look around Sandgem.

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>>9014088
>77 follows 33 to the armory.
>Skarmory follows 77 and 33 to the armory.
>The armory has various weapons on display and a grunt that looks after them.
Wow, this place is fucking loaded.
Any idea what kind of weapon you want, 33?

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>>9014153
Thank... you creech...
But... first
>picks an antidote from creech's bag
>hugs him
>roll to not be poisoned
Stay... safe... okay

>>9014153
>>9014319
>Tfw this is making me cry a little

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>>9014088
>>9014317
Hey, 33 and 77!
It's been too long guys, what can I do for you?
>BC-57's PDA buzzes.
Oh hey, looks like you guys must have done something special because I've just been told to let you both take a weapon of your choice.
See anything that catches your eye?

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>>9014317
>He looks the place over.
Fuck, man. We have more firepower than the police force.
Something... Quiet.
>>9014392
Hey, 57, how you been?
I'm thinking about that crossbow over there, can I get that?

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>>9014319
>poisoned
>uses the antidote
I'm... fine...
I'll... be waiting...
>Z sits down and stares at the door waiting
...
He... will... come back... right?

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>>9014392
Hey 57, good to see you again.
I'm looking for something with range, maybe that Mosin over there?

>>9014473
Yeah man, I didn't realize we were this well equipped.

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>>9014319
>>9014508
>a few moments pass
>then more
>and more
>finally creech comes out
>still the same color sadly
it didnt work
>his goo is leaving much more of a trail than before
i dont feel any better

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>>9014596
Sorry... to hear... that... creech
I'm sure... you will... find... a way...
Don't be sad...
>Z tries to comfort him

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>>9014473
>>9014587
I'm doing good, thanks.
I'm taking a break from doing fieldwork for a while to look after the armory, I've been looking after all this stuff for a few months now, it's been pretty cozy.
Alright so, Crossbow for 33 and Mosin Nagant for 77, I'll do all the paperwork for you guys so no need to worry about that.

You're also going to need some ammo, as you know we prefer using tranquillizer ammunition, even on people.
It's less messy that way plus we can interrogate and possibly even get some new recruits out of it.
You've been authorized a few lethal bullets for emergencies though.
>57 slides over two heavy cases, the one with a crossbow to 33 and the one with a Mosin Nagant over to 77.

>He also puts a couple of small boxes on his counter containing a small amount of ammo for 33 and 77's weapons.

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>>9014647
>poison touch doesn't activate
>creech gets the power of alchemy!
>he settles out a bit and hugs Z
i still have antidoes just
>goo sigh

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>>9014587
Well, we're well equipped now too.
>>9014734
Nice to see you doing well, 57.
>He takes the case
Thank you. Gotta get some practice with this thing.

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>>9014737
i don't... feel... any... different...
i think... it worked...
>Z hugs creech back
see... i'm fine...
not... poisoned...

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>>9014734
Alright, thanks a lot 57.

>>9014880
>77 grabs the case with the rifle in it and the ammo box and walks out of the armory.
Want to go see who's got the better aim, 33?

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>>9014887
thats good
>he hugs Z more
i think i need
a nap
>he sounds extremely tired
>goo drips off of him

>>9015064
>covered in goo
you... do sound... tired...
let's go... look for... somewhere... to sleep

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>>9015124
(forgot pic)

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>>9015024
Pff, doubt it's me but let's try it somewhere away from the nearby towns. Alright?
If anyone hears you start shooting we're fucked.

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>>9015124
>>9015150
alright
there are some trees over there how about that?

>>9003121
Kill yourselves, get thieves.

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>>9015294
sounds... good...
>Z sits on the tree
sit... here too...
>Z pats the floor next to him
sit... here... please...

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>>9015276
Yeah, totally.
>77 leads 33 and metal bird out of the Key Lair.
Alright, hop on.
>77 climbs onto Skarmory, the bird looks expectantly at 33.
I'm thinking the oasis might be a good spot.

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>>9003121
Sylvie!

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>>9015425
>he slithers on over and takes a seat next to Z
thank you
>he spreads out a bit as he falls asleep

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>>9015440
Oasis, nice. Maybe we can catch some pokes there.
>33 hops on.
Whisk me away to paradise, 77.

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>>9015467
What would a Mega Sylveon even look like?

>>9015532
shit

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>>9015532
like awesome of course!

>>9015476
Good... night...
Creech...
>Z hugs creech and goes to sleep hugging him

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>>9015551
>>9015561
Possibly

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>>9015562
(forgot pic)

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>>9015561
>>9015582
More ribbons
More dragon slaying
Also, hi there
Frankies gonna call his boss about the castle thing
We're almost there

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>>9015582
yes.

>>9015662
yes!

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>>9015519
>Metal bird: fly to the desert oasis.
>Roll to see how much Skarmory screeches along the way.
33 please, you're being silly.

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>cease dodging work by feeling up the seafood
>attempt to find Regigigas and/or punplant shaped hole in the castle walls

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>>9015696
Screee.
I'm always serious, 77. Always, all the time.
Screeeeee.

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>>9015671
Yes
>>9015662
Awesome though I've been wondering how we're gonna be able to help fix it up seeing as none of us besides Frankie are very dexterous

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>>9015791
>Vaporeon used Acid Armor!
I can check out water stuff
See?

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>>9015791
I can work stone. Rather well, as you know.

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>>9015791
yeah!

>>9015909
oh yeah you are the best at that. The castle would be too awesome for a king.