JOI/JOE Thread #23! (Jerk Off Instructions/Encouragement/And

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>>7967226
I guess nobody made a new thread after it died? That's fine~!

Posting some captions that I had made recently to get things going and to give people the general idea of the thread.

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>>7967252

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>>7967259

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>>7967273

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>>7967286

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>>7967294
Wow. I didn't do any human stuff in the past few days.

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requesting to get in contact with the person that made those amazing Rikki captions

>>7967314
Don'tcha just love how the archive only has about half the thread?

LSP1: I'd drop the "again" from welcome home. That or just make it a "Welcome back." It almost sounds like this is a part two, but even then it's disorienting.
I'd throw an "all" into the groceries bit or something to show that she's surprised by the amount. Which I'm guessing is the objective.
"Are all those groceries ya' bought for us?"
or perhaps, "Didja buy all those groceries for both of us/the two of us?"
Could help play to the drawl you've got going, but not necessary. I'm getting a bit of a vibe that she might not have had the best life so far, or at least in the recent past.
While I get what you're going for with the ellipses, I'd probably string it together as a normal sentence. Start with a colon and just use commas until the very end, since she'd be a little embarrassed about the mate bit. Speaking of, maybe consider changing it to "male" unless this guy is totally on board with starting a family. Again, if this is a part two, I'm not familiar with the prequels.

LSP2: She doesn't know what makeup is? I almost want to suggest "gunk" but it fits as is. Just be mindful of the accent you're going for. I'd change the "'em" at the end to something like "as pretty as they are" or use the whole "them". It's a bit funky to come to such a sudden stop.

LSP3: Getup usually refers to clothing, so if we're just talking about makeup, I'd suggest a change. Maybe use gunk here, instead of earlier, since it has a negative connotation and she's dismissing the need for it? I'd also refer to it specifically. "...without this gunk?" or "...without this X"
Uh... the honey bit is sorta really distracting. She's southern right? Why not call him a silver-tongued flatterer? Or something more southern?
Also, "more interested in" compared to what? She could always call him out here. Something along the lines of, "Don't think I don't see you starin' at my XYZ..."

1/2 damn post limit

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>>7967314
>>7967825
This is a sequel to this. I should mention that for context.

>>7967314
2/2

LSP3/4: Consider using exclamation marks a little more sparingly in these sections. They're pretty much everywhere.

LSP4: whatdoesthefoxsay.mp4
The woof here is just a little strange. Is she impersonating a dog, or is she pretending to be more of an animal? Consider a yip, or maybe a growl, or even a bark? Not a woof though, unless she's "acting."

LSP5: While I get the use of udders, it's another somewhat strange thing that kinda takes me out of the scenario. Were there any runner ups?
LSP6: Hurtin' so "bad". The "ya'" should probably be yer. It's not even yer part. The breeding thing is pretty sudden too.

"I can tell yer hurtin' down there hon. I could hear ya gruntin' and whinin' when you cupped your strong, rough hands over these full breasts of mine, and you weren't even the one gettin' felt up! Now, take off those pants, mister... You can't breed me with 'em on. Get 'em off already!"

LSP7: Oh lawdy, "Stars and garters!" Hahaha. Maybe heavens above? Stars above is fine, I'm mostly just laughing about how corny this is getting with the accent.
I'd probably suggest an, "It's so big!" The rest of the paragraph is... kinda bad? For starters you'd need an e at the end of writhe.

"Stars above! It's so big! Coming home to that/Seeing that every day is never gonna get old! That hard, round, massive thing... Mmmm, perfect for makin' a bitch moan, and writhe under that... th-throbbin' maleness...

RSP1: "Just lookin' at it is getting me wet/making me wet" perhaps? We need an action that leads to her getting wet. Seein' it, or lookin' at it or something.
>Quite
QUIT, the word is QUIT. He's QUITE the tease, and she wants him to QUIT teasing her.

If she's bringing up the human way, maybe something about being belly to belly, or face to face so she can look at him/into his eyes? A little sappy, but I'd suggest just a tiny more detail on what the difference here would be.

Fuckin' hell I'm writing too much.
2/3

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Well, i don't like to spam so much... but here a little reminder about my request!

also, tomorrow i will fix those tags on the booru with some free time...

>>7968278
Wet down under you say?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XfR9iY5y94s
I'll get to it after this one:

>>7967314
3/?

RSP2: No-legged dog? What? Isn't she on her back? These country-isms are mostly detracting and distracting at the point.

RSP3: "The sense of being..." instead of "This sense..."
It's not even in yet? We're just prodding her?

RSP5: She couldn't ever get a dicking this good from anyone other than us, right? It's kinda funky the way it's written right now.
"I ain't never gonna get a dicking this good from anything but a human- from anyone other than you!"
Play up the species thing first, then make it more specific. "We" need to feel special, right?

RSP6: Square with the facts? Why not just, "I'm gonna be straight with ya: if ya kiss me like that again, I'm cum my brains out on that big ol' dick of yers, ya hear? I betcha want me to, huh?"

RSP7: Since you just said "cum" I'd probably drop the second use. Just go straight to the breeding bit.

RSP8: Shakin' for it? There's gotta be a clearer way to express that she's desperate right? She wants it so bad she's shakin' is what you're trying to get across, but... It's not really clear at the moment. I get it, but it doesn't necessarily read that way.

Otherwise pretty hot. While I like the "accent" I'd say it's more trouble than it's worth.

>>7968643
How do the tags on the booru work? I was interested in trying myself, but I didn't want to do it wrong or overstep. As far as I can tell, you could use pre-existing tags right? Like from e621 or something? I wish there were tags for stuff like the fetish, or techincal elements - like differentiating between instructions, encouragement, scenarios, etc. That way I could filter in/out stuff like feet, countdowns, narration, and the like.

>>7968820
The first one ain't mine. I wouldn't mind it getting edited I suppose, but I don't have the gimp file for it.

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These cheerleaders have made a cheer to make every guy watching cum in their pants. They love seeing guys try to stop themselves from cumming only to fail and ruin their pants.

>>7968278
Lots of this is gonna be pretty subjective unless otherwise noted.

"Shoulda asked if I could stay the night, though."
"How can I repay ya? Oh, I know! I see ya lookin' at these perky lil' tits of mine. How about I squeeze 'em together for ya?"
"...touch these pups, don'tcha?"

At this font size, I'd recommend getting rid of the apostrophes you have before the "ya"s. "...for'ya..." looks weird. It almost looks like an asterisk (*).

"Can ya see every inch of lil' fox pussy?"
"...real hard under them pants!"

Ok, the "wet down under" here is really strange, at least to me.

"Keep strokin' that dick of yours, mister! I ain't never seen one like it!"
"F-fuck! It's makin' me so horny!"

"I ain't never seen a cock that big before, not even on another fox! Never done it with a human before neither, but who cares?"
"...gimmie some sugar!"

>>7968900
Eh, no biggie. Mostly subjective stuff, quality of life improvements if you will.

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>>7967314
>>7968820
RSP1: It's a spelling mistake.

RSP3: She's turned on by having his weight on top of her. Changed it around to be more specific about it being his body.

Yeah, the accent has its appeal but as a Canadian the most I can do is wear a cowboy hat and yell "yeehaw" while spinning a rope around my head. I really don't know anything about the American south aside from Twain.

Though I didn't want to drop the accent from the first caption, sadly.

And yeah, the tags are pretty much borrowed from e621, at least when I tagged them a while back. You can pretty much add any tag you want. There aren't that many taggers, so don't worry about getting mixed up.

Kudos to you guys by the way. I'm glad to see that the booru was updated from last thread, too.

>>7969335
Merely teasin' bruv.
I understood the body thing, I was surprised we weren't already inside her based on earlier descriptions.
Pretty damn good now, if I do say so myself. Again, though, watch out for excessive exclamation mark use. It was pretty much every sentence this time around.

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>>7969714
Right, aha. Thanks. Yeah. I'll watch exclamation mark usage too.

Going to be back in a bit, gonna' eat some dinner and play vida. Hopefully some requests start filling in, I don't mind the spamage too much.

Just wanted to pop in and do some edits quickly since I hate leaving things undone.

>>7968643
I can't wait to do this.

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Kanga and a human.

Requesting lesbians

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more monster girl stuff

>>7970491
Yeah, actually. MG is underrated. Do you have any pictures?

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>>7968820
Well, depend, if the image it's from e621 or similar page, i take the tags from it, if not, then i create it, but more poor of course.

>I wish there were tags for stuff like the fetish, or techincal elements - like differentiating between instructions, encouragement, scenarios, etc. That way I could filter in/out stuff like feet, countdowns, narration, and the like.

I'm going to consider this for future images.

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>>7970557
Here's one. The idea is you find her in a store and she asks you to buy her and take her home with you to fuck

>>7970700
I'll go on a little tagging spree later tonight.

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>>7970557
I'm more of a captioner than a requester, but I can post the stuff I've done and maybe come up with a few prompts with some images I have.

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>>7970750

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>>7970858

>>7970728
I saw this request in the other thread, might try and give it a go

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>>7970886

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>>7970949

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One with Urta please?

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Something anal focused, perhaps? With her fervently denying how she loves having her horns grabbed.

Alright, back. Sorry for spending some time away today, was busy getting assblasted in Dark Souls and I hate leaving boss fights unfinished.

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Something specific from the Discord, based on the Rikki captions.

>>7970463
Do you have any pictures? I think you're the guy from last thread, but I didn't save them and I can't view in the archive.

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>>7974271

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>>7974289

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>>7974271
>>7974289
>sees captions
Oh shii--
I need to get on the third one

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>>7974108
This one looks good for lesbo-ing

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Princess verbally working you up for round 2

>>7974308
Err, third one of the 2nd part...

I'm making this more confusing than it should be.

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Tia enjoying a public titfuck while talking to her sis on the phone

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>>7970728
All done, really happy how this one turned out actually. There's no raunchy talk but it's possessive with a bit of mind control, which I think suits the behavior of how the mg is described. Let me know what you think.

>>7973962
LSP2: I'd change the order with your "just," and turn it into an only.

"It's nice to have someone to talk to, even if they only visit me to get laid..."
I want to suggest dropping the comma after "pretty" so it reads "pretty little body" but I'm second guessing it...

LSP3: "You want me bent over like this?"
I assume she means when they start doing the deed right?

"You want me to stay bent over like this? That way, you can see both my cunt and my ass at the same time. So, which is it going to be? I really couldn't care less which hole you pick."

I guess she's supposed to be unfazed and disinterested. If you're going to use "couldn't" you need to qualify it. Otherwise just tell us she doesn't care.

LSP5: The "with you" transition is awkward. How about, "You seem to be enjoying yourself, if the way you're grabbing my ass and grunting with each thrust is any indication."

Drain a good load? Dump, drop, something else maybe? Sounds just a tad strange, but I'm not sure what to recommend in its place.
Baked cookies as opposed to fried cookies? Are they freshly baked? Homemade? Gimmie some more detail on the cookies with a different or extra adjective.

"Unless of course, you have to leave right away..."
I'm guessing she's kinda sad about it? Has it happened before? You could throw in an "again" if you wanted to tug on our heartstrings. Otherwise just fix the tense issue.

LSP6: I'd link the last two sentences together with either a dash, or a colon. While you don't see them too often, I think the full stop is too jarring.

RSP1: Your cock instead of that cock.
Again with the cum. While I don't hate "wad," I think you need another verb. Blow maybe? Blow a massive wad? Dump a load? Blow a load? Cum buckets inside me?

LSP6?: Here's the "blow your load." There's an awful lot of those kind of descriptions this time around. Just be mindful not to overdo it.

Gonna have to do a second post.
1/2

>>7974878
2/2

RSP8: "I want to milk your cock for every drop of cum you've got" or, "My tight pussy's gonna milk every drop of cum you've got out of your cock, got it?"

RSP9: Unf, I think you need to expand on the "Cum!" It's a little short all by itself, coming right after the creampie request.
"Come on, creampie this pussy!"
"Creampie this pussy! Cum inside me!"
Or something to that effect.

The "hon'" is sort of out of place. Maybe just a, "Hey, there's more where that came from, right?"

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>>7974878
>>7974944
>>7973962
Thanks. I made this for a friend so I'll be sure to share it.

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Request from the previous thread.

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>>7976905
>Come on, white

/jk, Not the requester, but this is a good way to wake up

>>7967259
the penis is speaking, shhh

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Something with this image
LOL

a lot of these bizarre adventures are created with one hand powering the death star, so you probably shouldn't expect perfect grammar and syntax

>>7976905
You're a saint!

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Can we have some more of this premium shark pussy?

>>7967408
Yeah, what's up

>>7978635
Not him, but those captions are 10/10. Awesome work.

bemp

>>7978635
Those captions are indeed 10/10. By any chance are you in the discord server? I'd love to see more of your stuff

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>>7977138
>>7977923
Thanks! Was going to work on at least one more "tonight" but I got lazy.

I guess I wasn't feeling much. Hopefully that changes after I get some sleep.

>>7979976
I'm in the discord right now

>>7972904
Rikki Captioneer here. Claiming this one

>>7981434
OR here, Yes. Just yes. Extremely lewd and adorable at the same time

Bumpin', gonna' get to work when I wake up fully.

>>7981434
Oh, sweet! New caption! Can't wait to read this when I get up.

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Reposting my request again my dood

"Furry escort becomes addicted to human cock"

>>7982823
Yeah, I'll check this out in a bit. I love this theme.

>>7981434
Rikkifag, you're the hero this general deserves.

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Repost from previous thread
Buster Bunny asking to masturbate with him, suck your dick, and cum all over him.

>>7969830
I wouldn't mind seeing something with this deathclaw.

Something with she's trying to seduce you by wearing these "human clothes".

>>7981434
OR again, if I may suggest a couple edits.

LSP4 Ohmegod should be Ohmygod

RSP2"settle on top of me fluffy tail against your chest" should have a comma or colon after "me"

Alright, back from some LoL, gonna work on some shit.

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A jynx seducing and fucking her trainer as thanks for him catching and training her

>>7978412
Yeah. I should hit this up sometime. I love me some shark girls, maybe tonight.

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>>7986260
Requesting a caption based on this pic. This girl reacts nonchalantly to having her boobs groped from behind by a stranger, yet encouraged him to squeeze harder, grope deeper, that kind of stuff.

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First JOE i made, feedback is accepted ;)

>>7987619

10/10

>>7987619
Kek. I thought this was a simple copy-paste of the meme first but then I saw the original touches. A+

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Sorry for taking my time in getting started. I think some allergies is slowing me down a bit, making me kinda' tired.

A request from last thread. Not sure how I feel about this one. Kinda' expanding into new themes and such that I haven't touched before.

>>7967252
Why does she have Mables sweater from Gravity Falls?

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>>7987509
I hope you don't mind some thigh fucking, but I wanted to fill in some space that wasn't just breastplay.

>>7990410
Huh. Now that you mention it...

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>>7969335
OR here
Thank you very kindly for the delivery!
I made more than ample use of it today already going at it once and then again after about a 2 minute breather.
DAMN good stuff although the "ain't gunna get a dicking this good from a canine" was a bit of a stopper, the rest is quite strong through and through!
Cheers!

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>>7991336
Ah! Thanks! The first one was a great caption, so I had fun making this one too.

And I edited out that part you mentioned, it's no problem. I don't mind doing stuff like this for other captions too, for anyone else reading.

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>>7991482
I think the text was too big, I don't think anyone would notice but it bothered me aha.

>>7989302
Let's get this part started!

LSP1: For some reason I don't quite like the way this sounds...
"You're such a pathetic worm, you know that? You already have a girlfriend and yet you're sending me all these erotic messages."
Not sure what kind of accent or tone you're going for with this character, so feel free to interpret this suggestion as you will.

LSP2: She's not actually annoyed right? Cause otherwise I'd suggest an "Ugh!" to start, so you aren't starting a sentence with "and".

What would > found out
What will > finds out
Watch your tenses!

Does she consider this cheating, or...? The "shame" bit seems to follow better with an "if she found out." That way it almost sounds like a threat. Otherwise, since you already used shame, I think you'd do better to focus on the other girl's emotions (so long as they fit the piece).
"She seems so nice and sweet... She'd be crushed if she knew her boyfriend was being unfaithful to her..."
or, "...her boyfriend was cheating on her... with me..." depending on if it fits the tone of the piece.

LSP3: Pop in an exclamation mark after "touch me".
"Not that I'd ever let you touch me!"
While I get what you're saying next, if you phrase it like "out of my league," it sounds as if he's the catch and she's the frumpy one.
You want to communicate that she's beneath him.
"You're far beneath someone of my status, and nowhere near in the same league as me. You should be grateful I haven't sent my brother/butler to beat you up!"
Now I'm getting a real ojou-sama vibe! Ha ha.

LSP4: I don't get this paragraph. What exactly shows that they want her?
"Just goes to show how desperate you peons/common riff-radd are. Though... I suppose teasing you does feel rather nice, so I'm not exactly innocent either..."
I get that she's getting more vulgar, but "get off" seems a little too crude this early. At least to me.

LSP5: "Of course you are: I know you." Some stronger punctuation here, I think. Very definite.

1/2

>>7989302
2/2
LSP5: This paragraph is kinda... Would anyone really describe a picture of themselves this way? I'm over-analyzing, but it sounds awkward.
"...you must have practically torn your clothes off!"
Or something.

RSP1: "...anytime you want, but instead you choose to..." Just a swap of "instead" and "you". Works a tiny bit better in my opinion, but think it over.

RSP2: "Just the thought is turning me on..."
The rest - I'm not quite sure what to suggest.

"Mmm, the idea that a boyfriend is betraying his lover over nothing more than a selfie!"
"Mmm, the idea that her boyfriend is betraying his lover with a selfie of all things!"
"Mmm, the idea that someone's boyfriend would betray their lover to a selfie!"

Admittedly more than a little awkward. He's betraying the GF with this girl, but not physically - just in spirit. I almost want to say he's betraying his lover /over/ a selfie, but that's wrong too.

RSP3: If it's me, I'd throw a "little" before secret, and drop the "and" in the second sentence.
"She doesn't need to know. This can be our little secret, okay? I'll keep sending you pictures, too, but only under one condition: I want you to keep showing me your 'tributes' whenever you jerk off to me/them."

RSP4: Maybe a, "You have to start with this picture, too." Or, a "I want you to start with this picture."

Otherwise pretty good, but I couldn't read all the subtext. Not sure what the OR was going for, so if I tread on the details, feel free to work around my suggestions.

>>7990472
LSP1: "So you're a groper, eh? I guess there's no point resisting... Mmmph! When you have breasts this |huge| I guess you really /should/ share them."

LSP2: Braver? I'm gonna pretend this is happening on a train. I really think braver is the way to go.
You could use pressing "into" if you wanted. I'd suggesting going with "my" tits instead of "these". If you're going for something more third person though, ignore.

LSP3: Again, not sure if you wanted to go with "my" or "these". "What is that down there" is almost off-putting though. "What do we have here?" comes to mind, but that's a bit too flavourful for what should otherwise be a calm and collected young lady, right? Maybe just a, "What's down here?" Haha, or maybe an, "I hope that's you poking me down there."

LSP4: First sentence is janky, but the rest is pretty solid. Why is she describing it this way? You have to get inside the mind of your characters!

In all seriousness though, how about something like, "You've already pulled out your cock, huh?"

RSP1: Noice, picking up speed here. I think you can keep it all, just change "close" to "closer". Something closer to a tight pussy.

Maybe even, "Heck, I'll even push them together to give that throbbing dick of yours something closer to a nice tight pussy to thrust into." Not really necessary though aside from the "closer" in my opinion.

RSP3: "What, did you think I was just humoring you? Believe it or not, I'm getting pretty close to cumming. You'll see."

RSP4: I'd probably drop the "which".
"Speaking of... Are you getting close? I kinda need to head to school, so go ahead and cum between my thighs. Come on, give it to me! Cum already!"
For whatever reason, that "like" took me right away to a valley girl style of speech, which sorta killed the vibe.

>>7987619
holy mother of kek. 10/10 would read fan again

>>7991336
I think that pic could be fun. Like needing a little extra something from you in her drink maybe.

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>>7991577
>>7991808
>>7989302
>Otherwise pretty good, but I couldn't read all the subtext.
Thanks, and I can't read much behind the subtext either. It was some cheating request where instead of involving sex it involved sexting and stuff. I'm not really into NTR (and I know most of it has to do with psychological/mind stuff) so it was kind of hard to make things click right.

I think you have a pretty good head for this. I'm posted some things I wasn't exactly too happy about but they've turned out all right with the right editing and such.

>>7992562
>I'm posted
I'd suggest "wasted." Har de har.

Thanks very much, I do it for the (You)s.
[spoiler]Kidding, really.[/spoiler]

Always glad to be of service, it's a little bit of mental exercise here or there believe it or not. Doesn't hurt if I find the material "inspiring" either. Always a boner killer to run into a grammatical or spelling error. The simpler it is, the worse it is too!

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How about some demon shortstack?

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>>7990472
>>7992087
Cheers!

>>7992750
You're not too far off, was drinking a bit of wine before I realized it was twice as strong as my normal brand.

>>7992087
Oh, and I forgot.

>You have to get inside the mind of your characters!
That's some pretty good advice. I think my biggest issue is my inner narrator trying to "fight" against the dialogue I'm writing, which leads to some awkwardness since I'm putting too much narrative writing into the dialogue. Such as “ you reached down and…”, which is descriptive but doesn’t fit whatsoever.

>>7993270
It was meant as a joke: a little jab at the calibre of material we're dealing with, but I think it does help. Just remember that you, the reader, are involved in the scenario. The other character is talking to "you."

>>7993270
Gnight.

night bump

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Team RWBY is very happy you saved them from a grimm their team couldn't beat and wishes to repay you. Question is: who do you fuck first?

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yang is stressed from a long day and wants buttsex to "loosen her up". butt and anal puns are okay to sneak in

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Another morning one. Gonna' rest my head for a bit again.

Hoping for a more productive day today, but these allergies are kinda' killing my mojo. Though I'm feeling fine now, so that's a sign.

>>7997906
G'morning.

RSP3: I'd probably change "erotic" to "exciting."
Consider throwing a "be" before "brought down" - "It's so exciting to watch a strong man be brought down by nothing more than some dainty paws..."
Though, that kind of raises more questions in my mind. While I understand the intent, what is he being brought down to? Usually you'd say something like, "reduced to a quivering, excited heap" or somesuch, where there's an actual end point.

RSP4: Burning hard? I mean, I guess? Was there a second runner up though?

Otherwise, more feet stuff... Eh, whatever I guess? There were some super minor, really nitpicky things I saw along the way, but it's actually fine as is. No major changes needed. Just think about my suggestions and edit accordingly.

>>7982823
Any progress on this?

>>7999754
I'll check it out when I get up properly.

>>7999299
>Otherwise, more feet stuff... Eh, whatever I guess?
Just some request fills on the Discord.since I drank too much for anything else.

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Re-requesting this polar bear talking about all the lewd things she looking forward to during your night over in her igloo while emphasizing near the end that nights last six months in the arctic.

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Human on Dragon

Alright, I'm up. Gonna clear the tree for a moment but I'll get workin soon.

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>>7999299
>>7997906

>>8003016
Ffffffff, I somehow missed the "Under you breath" in LSP2. Should be "your" breath.

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>>8003184
>>8003016

Right, working on the escort one now. Sorry for the wait, had to do things after I said I wanted to start writing.

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>>7982823
Human on anthro, check. Implied impregnation, check. Wow, it's hitting all my standards!

Hope I didn't play it up too much near the end, but I think it's erotic enough.

>>8006603
Requester here thanks my dood great as always

>>8006603
LSP1: "and" > "but"
"...cocks were so good, but now I can't get enough of them!"

LSP2: The paragraph's kinda wonky. I get the fetish value, but... Every sensitive nerve? Why?

LSP3: Play up previous business/partners? That humans are her favourites?

LSP4: "That" meaning when? Strange phrasing. Ah, you kind of explain it in the next sentence, but it's still a little strange. I have to retroactively interpret, or just reinterpret, the previous.

LSP5: There's gotta be a better way to say "must be nothing compared to". Shorten it? "Human pussy's noting compared to this, right?"

You need to throw in some more varied punctuation, as strange as it may look.
"You've seen how enticing my cunt is when I bent over; plump pussy dripping with need and the desire for a good breeding."
Or something. The comma isn't really sufficient. I feel like there's a minor tense issue with bend and seen as well.
I'd throw an "us" before canines, or maybe turn it into something more like a pet-name? For bitches like me? Pooches? Doggies? Puppers? Doggos?
"Every thrust inside me makes my passage grip and tighten around your turgid dick!"
You also seem to use "turgid" quite a bit, by the way.
The passage is strangely technical somehow.

RSP1: Thrusted > Thrust
Resist > Help
"I couldn't help but cum on that cock of yours after just a few thrusts!"

RSP3: This is oddly repetitive given what we've seen so far. Are you using some kind of outline for these? I sure hope so, cause otherwise - if you're just working off the top of your head - you're gonna run into the same problem later on where you run out of ideas and end up repeating yourself.

RSP4: While I get what you're going for, slightly awkward. Maybe bring up that she'd die if she couldn't ever again taste his dick or somesuch.
Repetition of "yours". Restructure or consider an alternative perhaps?

RSP5: "I want to feel your breath on my neck as you bite me and cum deep inside my womb!" perhaps?
1/2

>>8007497
2/2
Yeah, that's actually kind of it. Themes are right up my alley, but it gets a little repetitive. Imagine she's building the mood, whispering sweet nothings into her lover's ear as they get hot and heavy. I feel like the length doesn't suit the scenario. It's collapsing under its own weight, if you catch my drift.

So far, we've got:

Stimulus
Stimulus
Plot
Stimulus
Plot/Stimulus
Plot/Stimulus
Stimulus/Plot
Stimulus
Stimulus
Stimulus

It's a bit heavy on the dirty stuff - not that that's bad. Just that there's too much of it in an absolute sense. If it's 75% stimulus, and we have 11 paragraphs, it's pretty damn heavy. 75% of 6-7 though is a bit better, in terms of absolutes, even if the ratio/percentage is the same.

Blah, it's kinda hard to make any concrete recommendations here given that I'm not actually writing the stuff.

TL;DR If you aren't already, set up a general framework with key ideas/phrases to guide you through the caption so you aren't ad-libbing on the fly.

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>>8007497
>>8006603

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I wasn't the organial requester but I'd like a sequel to the shark week, so the guy who watched the avert goes there. Have the same theme as the last one with the whole shark pussy is better angle to it like before

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Sex demons are totally unfazed by even the nastiest fetishes. The sex demon you summoned is begging you to fuck her after you have given her innocent kisses on the cheek, holding her hand and taking her out to a romantic dinner. She wants you to do ANYTHING sexual so she can cum for a good reason. You give her a gentlemanly kiss on the hand and she cums so hard she gushes through her panties and makes it look like she wet herself

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>>8001036
Maybe it's because I'm Canadian, but I find the idea of fucking a polar bear in an igloo very erotic.

>>8007730
Ah. I think I see what you mean, at least in some parts. I imagine with longer captions you want them more plot-based rather than just pure, direct smut? I suppose that makes sense. Writing "fucking this" and "sucking that" might be too much of a sensory overload if I keep piling it on and on. I've been drinking a bit, so I may not be making too much sense, but I think the "me" from a few hours ago understood what you meant.

And in regards to frameworks, I'll try planning a beginning, middle, and end.

>>8010601
P1: Promise you "made" me, especially since you go on to use "give" right after. Hmm, I'd actually recommend changing that to "keep."

"You can hide from the snow storm in here, but you have to remember that promise you made me: you're going to keep me 'company' the /entire/ night."

P2: Consider, "...got excited and asked for something a bit naughty."
While I get it, and it fits, it could flow just a little bit better.

P3: I'd make the last sentence a bit cuter if possible.
"Do you, uh, have any ideas on ways we could have 'fun' together?"

P4: I'd recommend changing up your plural here.
I've heard about blowjobs
I heard about blowjobs once

Want to try what? Maybe get a bit more specific? She wants to, "try giving one" or wants to try and make us feel good?

Start the morning, or perhaps start our mornings if she's looking into the future of a possible relationship.

"It might even be necessary too, since you'll get a hard-on from sucking on these breasts for breakfast."
Fuck me I gave myself a stiffie. I think making her a bit more aggressive here would do wonders. At the very least, I'd be a bit more specific or concrete than, "a bit necessary" and "might." Take charge woman! Ride me into the sunset!

P5: Maybe throw a toasty in there somewhere? Toasty warm? It's great as is, feel free to ignore - really minor suggestion.

P6: A little verbose to start?
"Using me as your bed is gonna make certain things easier too... like thrusting your morning wood inside me! Imagine it: waking me up by giving me a warm, deep creampie and then pumping back into me for seconds!

Uh, where'd the cubs thing come from?
"Put some cubs in me before the night is over!" perhaps? I'm honestly baffled. Cubs from a previous mating? With some other bear? What?

P7: I'd suggest daylight instead of daytime.
If you're gonna use see, I'd say go with "the sun" or just say, "...another six months before we get any proper daylight!"
I don't get the last bit either.

>>7972367
Bump for Urta

>>8010840
Ah, just re-read the OR, maybe emphasize that she's just talking to herself at the end?
"Hmm? No, I didn't say anything..."
or
"Hmm? No, you must be hearing things..."
Perhaps with a "come back to bed or something?"

>>8010601
Beginning is just gonna be setting the scene. Who are they, who are we, why are we in this scenario?
Middle's gonna be getting to the good stuff. She/he/they are gonna work us into a little frenzy.
Then we need to transition into the heavy stuff, or really pile on the teasing.
Finally you'll probably have the "climax" and maybe some pillow talk to close things out.

I'm sure you know all that - I didn't mean having any kind of crazy stiff framework. Just keep track of where you are and keep moving forward. Yeah, with a longer caption, tons of the same kind of fap material gets a little old pretty quick, at least in my opinion. Vary stuff up, and circle back if you have to, but there needs to be a little palette cleanser in between.

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>>8010926
>>8010601
Yeah, I have a bad habit of making things only clear for the OR. Though for other people I should elaborate more.

>>8011460
P4: "...and I want to try it giving you one."
I'm guessing you wanted to go with the giving thing, so the "it" needs to go.

Uh...
"I wouldn't mind getting a cumshot down MY throat to sate YOUR thirst..."
You mean "my" as in her thirst?

P6: The cubs thing still doesn't make sense. Is she somehow already pregnant with "our" cubs? Or, wait... Are you saying "night" here as in six months of darkness? Cause then you might want to put some kind of emphasis on "night" and explain either before or immediately after that the darkness is gonna last six months... Though that kinda steals the thunder of the closer at the end...

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>>8011557
1.) I forgot to remove it.
2.) I restored it. It wasn't clear, and even if it was I wouldn't want to use "thirst" in the same sentence with breastfeeding.
3.) I removed it. You did catch on to what I meant, but I'm not going to rewrite the last two paragraphs since I think it's fine as it is.

>>8012037
>on ways we could have
I think you accidentally a fun

Otherwise looks great.

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>>8012707
>>8010601
Ah, I should have checked for words cut off after I re-enlarged the text. Well, it's fixed.

>>8012826
Fourth time's the charm. Man, we gotta streamline this process!
Looks good mang, glad to slap my e-peen of approval all over it.

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Some rando request from a few threads ago, not sure if the guy is around but I felt like doing it. It's pretty rough though. I don't think I can get off to it, but I guess some of you guys might be into it.

>>8012875
In hindsight, I shouldn't have been drinking tonight. Makes things harder, especially when I wanted to make some rewrites near the end there but couldn't think up anything at the time.

>>8012984
Thought > was
Think > is
Watch you tenses!

LSP4: Unless this is supposed to be especially old-timey, I'd suggest "I've told you everything I know about the Red Faction!"

LSP6: I'd suggest putting the final WHACK right before she says it, as opposed to after. Or, one before and one after, but definitely one before.

RSP3
Tastes > makes me want > thrust that thing > start spurting
Tasted > made me want to > thrust that thing > started spurting
Tenses. That was actually a pretty long chain, but you need a thrust in the middle no matter what, since you can use thrust as both a present instruction and a past recollection.

Thrust it inside me
He thrust his thing inside me

RSP4: I'd put the emphasis on hit rather than you. Otherwise it almost sounds like they wouldn't be red if someone else had hit them, whereas the truth is that they're red because they were hit.

RSP5: I'd throw an "already" after humiliation, but that's just me.
I don't get the "do anything." It's a sort of, do whatever you like, right? Get it over with?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4jcI4QMOiWY

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>>8012984
>>8013188
This caption seemed more erotic for me on another read through. Maybe it's stirring something deep inside me.

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Another older request, I think.

>>8013563
Nice.

>>8013614
LSP3: I'd change the last comma to a dash.
"...I saw a cutiepie on the beach with a throbbing dick straining against his swimming trunks with nobody to give him a hand - now /that's/ my problem!"
Though, when she says it's her problem, does she mean that it's a problem, or is she referring to not being mad earlier?

LSP4: The isn't on some screen bit should probably be her offering her something better.
"You want something to strike it do that you won't find on that screen?
"You want something to stroke it to that's better than anything you could find on that screen?"
Something to draw a clear distinction between her being there and the pale imitation he's got on his screen. She's obviously much better, and real. Touching her would feel much better than touching his phone. Or some kind of touchscreen joke.

RSP3: I'd split the second sentence in two.
"You want to give 'em a good grope? C'mon, be brave... Run your hands down each mound and pinch those buds. Mmph..."

RSP4: Choking, not chocking. The painting bit sounds awkward. "Should I give you a target?" or something. I get it, but it reads weird. Or, you could have her sort of tease him about it?
"What, do I need to paint you a target?"
Suggesting it's pretty obvious what she wants. Kind of like the, "Do you need a written invitation" kind of thing, you know?

I'm hittin' the hay, catch ya tomorrow!

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>>8013725
>>8013614
Awesome, thanks. I should head to bed too, though I may pop out another one to give some more meat to the thread.

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I might try some new approaches tomorrow, I dunno. I want to shake things up a bit. Maybe some more traditional JOI.

Though knowing me I'm either going to forget to do promised requests that I want to do (but somehow put aside) or keep writing more furry porn with implied impregnation. Aha...

>>7986339
Here you go.

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Requesting /SS/ with a shark girl

A shota is walking on the beach alone early in the morning when he sees a naked shark girl on the shore.
She says it's mating season and that she needs to get impregnated.
She sees his erection trough his swimming shorts and thinks he has a cute little cock and invites him to come over there to fuck her.
Focus on calling him a naughty little boy and emptying his balls deep inside of her so she gets pregnant.

I'm heading to bed properly now. G'night, nerds.

>>8014537
These shark girls are going to be the end of me, and I love it.

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>>8012826
Follow up request

Anon comes back six months after his 'night' with the polar bear for a visit. Her being surprised he came this far north again and asking if he wanted to spend another 'night' after reminiscing about all the fun you two shared while acting it out . By the end her question begins to sound like pleading and then begging as she wants so bad for anon to choose her as a mate and fill her with lots of cubs. Either that or after he accepts she makes a comment about 'polar marriages' where a couple who spend two polar nights together are considered married, then playfully changes the subject.

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Requesting something with your night at a strip club getting interesting when this zebra spots how excited you are to be at an anthro place, a private show ensues.

mornin bump

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Requesting a bimbofication/brain-drain focused caption of this, if anyone is willing.

Gonna' take a nap and be back in an hour or so, then I'll get started on some writing.

>>7982895
But Anon, that's gay though.

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'Member when you requested one but you didn't get a JOI. I 'member

>>8018668
Only if our balls will touch

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>>8018840
I must have posted it in the thread after the thread where you requested it.

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>>8019066
thanks

>>8018888
Are you sure?

>>8020078
Yeah, nothing wrong with men's fluids exchange

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Lola Bunny teasing teens on the beach

>>8014371
LSP1: She's saving the best for last, so I'd say "for last" instead of "for the end". She doesn't need to be cheeky though unless that fits the theme.

LSP2: I'd go with "wearing this" As in, this outfit - singular. Same thing with "them". I can see you appreciate "it" - either meaning the outfit, or the effort.

RSP1:
"You're getting so aggressive! Grabbing my ass, and dropping that cock between my cheeks... I take it you want to thrust that dick deep inside me, huh? Pull my panties aside and make that dream come true..."

RSP2: Making her? Why not something like, "I can't help but arch my back when you prod that dick against my dropping slit. Hurry, shove it inside me! I need to thank you for catching and training me and my tight pussy!"
Or is she implying that he caught and trained her tight pussy in the sense that she's referring to herself as nothing more than a tight pussy?

RSP3: "...thrusting her ass back to meet your thrusts!"

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Lotte having gentle, loving sex w/ reader

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>>8014537
>More shorks

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french skunkgirl who is in heat and has a scent that acts like an aphrodisiac. plenty of smell talk and talk of how you will only get skunkgirls from now on from the smell you will get from her. she has a lot of skunkgirl friends to mate with you and add their smell to you

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>>8021166
>>8014371
That nap was longer than I thought. Though I suppose I should quit making captions from 0:00 to 5:00am.

Or at least sleep in...

>>8022443
*rubs hands together*
Are you a sharkophobe, goy? There is nothing unnatural with a man and a shark mating with each other.
(I'll try to balance things out if I catch myself doing too many sharks over other things, and I suppose this goes for other things too)

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High-class pone wanting you to coat her behind in your cum

Other mlp stuff in this thread would also be appreciated pls

>>8022800
>dropping slit

Anon, the first step is admitting you have a problem. We're here for you. Don't let alcohol control your life.

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>>8014371
>>8022900
REE

>>8022612
So only smell good to skunkgirls? I'm okay with this

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something where these two wild bulbasaurs capture a young trainer and force him to breed them.

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>>7974319
Some good ol' Celestia.

>>8022612
Want the french skunk booty

>>7996684
>>7996892
I need this

>>8025787
LSP1: How about, "That was such a massive cumshot/load!" Instead of having us "give" her a cumshot?
"Were you really that pent up?"
I almost want to recommend having her ask us how many days worth of cum we'd saved up for her, but maybe that's a different direction than where you want this to go.

LSP2: What's with this stem stuff? You're doing it an awful lot lately... Do we even need this little detail? Why not go with something more exotic - or accurate - and just tell us she deepthroated us?
"Deepthroating your cock was a good promotion bonus, right? You might've cum the moment my lips touched the dick, but someone had to relieve the pressure in that bottled-up cock!"
Though the bottled up thing is kinda ehhhhh...
Why not just have her explain something like, "If someone hadn't let off some of that steam, you were liable to pop!" Or, have her sort of accuse us... If she hadn't done it herself, we might've attacked a coworker. "Pulled up a secretary's skirt/rookie's armour and gone at it right here in the office/barracks!"
Ffffff, calm down boner...

LSP3: Go with something like, "Aww, what do you mean you can't get hard again? That just won't do!" Since we obviously just let loose right on top of her, this'll give us some insight into just how ravenous her sexual appetite is. It's not enough that she get us off once. She wants us writhing underneath her, begging her to stop.

LSP4: Instead of strong hand, why not something like, "...like the strong soldier you are?"
Instead of "good incentive" why not have it be "incentive enough to keep going/push through the pain..."

RSP1: Uh...I get it, but it's awkward.
"You're so naughty... masturbating on top of the princess you swore to protect, and making her watch too! Does that turn you on? I bet it makes you want to stroke even faster and harder so you can pump out another rich and creamy load right onto my tits!"

I'm gonna run out of characters, so 1/2

>>8027960
RSP2: It might just be me, but I prefer "soldier" over guard. Even if she's just inflating our ego, it's an extra stroke.
"Or... if you wanted to shoot your cum somewhere even better, how about you give me a nice creampie?"
While I know what the mating press is, it's rather awkward to throw it into the caption in my opinion.
"Just hold me down against the floor and mount me like you want to mate me. Press that flare/your head deep inside me, against my unprotected womb."
I'd replace "cumshot" with "shot" just to improve the flow. We all know what she's talking about.

RSP3: I'd throw a "huh?" at the end of this sentence if you keep it 100% as is.
"You're getting worked up for another round, huh? Good! I can't wait for you to shoot your sperm/load deep inside me. You'd better not hold back because I'm a princess. Tonight, I'm nothing more than a soldier's cockwarmer/cumdump/cocksleeve/breeding whore/cumslut/whathaveyou."
You've been using "cockwarmer" an awful lot lately.

RSP4: I'd change this altogether if you're up for it. We're clearly already fucking her hard, so we need the encouragement to just finish deep inside and breed her. Put a little prince or princess inside her. Maybe throw in some leg-lock?

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>>8013614
>mfw anon finishes my old requests

>>8027660
>those horns
>that claw

This is a deathclaw, isn't it.
God damn, patrolling the mojave almost makes you wish to raped by nuclear lizards.

>>8028647
Nothing like breeding slutty, cock-hungry deathclaw bitches to spice up your patrol, eh?

>>8028666
God damn right. Wouldn't mind losing to a few of those honeys.

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>>8025787
>>8027960
>>8028091
yee

You had some good suggestions here, much hotter now imo aside from the obvious syntax and flow corrections.

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You work at a hotel and get a call for room service. You enter and see this image. The occupant demands that you give room service by tit fucking her so she can get off.

>>8028759
Especially if they wanted to ride your dick into oblivion.

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While hiking, you wander a bit off the map and get completely lost. You find this gal, but she'll only tell you how to get back out if you give her a little help.

>>8028797
LSP4:
"...is incentive enough," not
"...is an incentive enough"

RSP3:
After reading it, I can say I should've recommended a "just because I'm a princess."
Though the context is fairly clear, it could somehow be interpreted as her trying to use her position of authority, which isn't what we're really going for.
"You'd better not hold back just because I'm a princess." vs
"You'd better not hold back, because I'm a princess."
See what I'm getting at?

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>>8029079
>>8028797
>>8025787
1.) Thanks, I wasn't sure whether it was one or the other.

2.) Good catch. Probably minor, but I think it's best that we make sure it doesn't "snag" someone the wrong way when the read it.

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Is that guy who used to read Sequential Art still interested in a Scarlet request?

Idea is she's on the couch with Anon and is asked to do some things for him. Lay back with her legs open, spread her pussy, play with it and put fingers in, etc. She thinks nothing bad of it or Anon jerking off to her and is even more okay with it as she pleasures herself to orgasm.

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>>8029219
>*sweating intensifies
on the same note can anyone do something with this pic? Preferably on the lines of impregnation begging, and general vanilla stuff. I love you writefags

Bemp!

mornin' bump

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You're the boss of a company and you have had a long day, your secretary gives you the good news that you have completed your schedule. "She" knows what you like to do to relieve stress and "her" ass has been twitching in anticipation

>>8027505
i need this 2

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>>8031180
Requesting an alternate version where a glowing sea Deathclaw describes all the ways shes going to rape you while trying to hide how excited she is to have finally found a worthy breeding stud even if he lost to her who can't ever escape her den due to the radiation

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A bump for squirrel tits is a bump for justice

>>8032200
ooh, hot

>>7989302
>>7992562
Wow that's really nice, best pic ITT

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Requesting some lewd text over this pic of Sena, doesn't have to be long, keep it brief

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Got an easy one that is begging for a creampie scene and her friend too.

>>7967226
!!!!!!

>>8031180
RSP3: If we're pumping something into her, I wouldn't describe it as a creampie. You could use load, or just say cum, but I don't think "creampie" works well here. Same with "some" crushed bones. "The crushed bones" or maybe "any crushed bones" or even "those/your crushed bones."

Good otherwise. I'd only be able to suggest minor stuff here or there, but it isn't really necessary.

File: 1008555__explicit_artist-colon-sundown_rarity_sassy+saddles_canterlot+boutique_spoiler-colon-s05e14_big+breasts_big+lips_blowjob_breasts_disembodied+pe.png (879KB, 1593x1517px) Image search: [Google]

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I'd like some dirty Rararara and Sassy saddle pls

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>>8037109
>>8031180
Awesome. Always game for suggestions too, so don't worry about thinking you're being a bit too zealous.

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Posting a delivery I got a while back in case anyone would like it

>>8038276
Yeah, but it's kinda nitpicky to suggest putitng a just, or only, or adding or subtracting a comma when it doesn't really hurt the piece as a whole.

>>8038348
>your so good
Not this kinda shit right here is exactly why I edit...

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>>8038602
I saw it too, but the person who made it wouldn't change it for me...

>>8038602
Fffffffcuking... "Now this kinda shit right here is exactly why I edit."
Goddamit, undermining my own "authority" by making stupid mistakes like this.

>>8038660
This whole thing is a travesty.
>I just like it
>some one
>a good squish
>squish
>your
>thats
>your
>offten

I mean... Just why. There's no excuse for half this shit.

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>>8038841
Yup. I've been knowing about it for a while, and I just tried not to mind it.

If you or anyone else would like to take a better crack at it...


...PLEASE...

Alright, gonna' start working on some captions and such. Might have to eat some dinner in a bit, but otherwise my schedule is clear.

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>>8039890
Requesting a caption based on this pic. Wonder how a girl would feel being trapped in a full Nelson position, her undies out to the world and delicious legs open for fun caressing.

Perhaps a few watchers can come and touch her as she struggles, particularly her leg, midriff, thighs and panties, making her squirm and struggle...

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Re-requesting this one

Something with no insertion allowed

She is very strict and kind of mean

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bumping with some old content

>>8042143
LSP1: Maybe something lile, "Oh, you think you're going to be the one doing the fucking? That's cute."

RSP1: If the fingerbanging is more of a noun, like creampie, so I wouldn't throw it right next to "against." That or put a space between finger and banging.
So...
"Endure this fingerbanging your ass is taking!"
or
"Endure this finger banging/probing/rubbing/pushing inside your ass!" Definitely go with "inside" though.

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Sorry for the content delay, was having some writer's block and couldn't get some inspiration. Finishing up something now.

>>8042870
>>8042143
I'm glad I keep the old files around to edit them.

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Posting the first one.

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>>8043330
Then the one with Saphayla

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>>8043348
And then Mosrael. Saph's coordinating the "revenge" by the way too in case you don't like "you" cheating on her. I could have mentioned that in the caption, but... you know... it's a caption and not a detective novel or something aha.

I think it's alright, but my lack of creativity today made things kinda' slow and it might show in the writing. I think I'm pretty revved up right now though for others.

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Suggesting something with this.

>>8043348
LSP4: "Came" would be the past tense unless she's being cute or naive.

LSP7: I'd suggest "begging for some air," or something similar. If you want to go with "taken out," maybe straining to be taken out? Or crying to be taken out? The begging just seems a tiny bit awkward.

RSP1: "And you've been hiding this from me?" sounds kinda strange. Like she's angry we murdered someone and didn't tell her... Or something. Why not something like, "I can't believe you managed to hide something like that!" Something to that effect. The "perhaps" at the end is also janky.

"Wow, that's quite the BEAST you've got down there... I can't believe you managed to hide it this long. I need that thing in me NOW. Though, you'll be gentle... right?

RSP3: Nudge would go with rub, not rubbing. Same with smear. Prepare. Tenses. Otherwise you need to turn it into her describing whatever's going on. You're nudging, rubbing, smearing, preparing.

RSP4: This should almost go before the previous paragraph. We're already right up against her, and inside her even. What's this "reaching out" business? We're right there. "Grab and grope my breaths! Mmmph, press your whole body up against me."
We're already connected at the hips.

RSP5: Are you going with colour codings? You could just go with "my friend" to make this a standalone piece. You even tell us exactly which one you're referring to, too.
I'd combine here: "Yes, you heard me."
Again, tenses - Wrap >arch >make
Though with the make, you should really just have "moan out in desire when you press deep inside me." Drop the making bit altogether.

RSP6: Heave her thighs? What? Just use wrap. Even fold would be better. Or put.
It has me on edge too
or
I'm on edge too
or
I'm on edge already too/I'm already on the edge too

RSP7: In her mouth or down her throat. The two don't really mix. Even if she does have a snout/maw.

>>8043413
LSP1: "You were expecting Saph to be on this bed instead of me, huh?"
You could also use "someone else" to make it more generic/standalone.
You could also just say, "Weren't expecting me to be on this bed, huh? I wonder where your girlfriend could be?" if you want it extra spicy.

LSP2: I'd drop "throughout" here. "All night last night" or "all night" to keep it short. Throughout kinda kills the flow here.
Is "Blue's" virginity supposed to be a surprise here? Cause she says "some cherries" in her own piece.
I kinda want to suggest "sweet nothings" instead of "such sweet things." I'd also swap out "is that right" for "Am I right?"

LSP3: What did we do on purpose exactly? A tiny bit more detail would help here. Does she mean the cumming in our pants, or sleeping with the other girl?
I'd suggest "knowing that I got you two..." instead of "it" since again, it's kinda vague without more detail and you might not have room for her to say "my teasing."
"Oh! You had no idea that Saph was a... Well, it shouldn't be too surprising./Well, it shouldn't bee too much of a surprise. I was kinda hoping that, maybe... you'dwanttotakemyvirginitytoo?"

RSP5: Instead of having the cock make her - since it sounds more narrative - she should probably go with something like, "I can't resist the urge to..." or "makes me want to." It's a little more "in character" that way, if that makes sense.
"Come on, really give it to me!" perhaps? Otherwise I'd drop the "into me" and just go with, "Come on, start humping, I can take it! Ahhn~!

RSP6: "Driving" me insane.

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>>8045438
>>8043348
Ah, thanks. Glad this one was edited even if it meant going through my folders to find it.

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>>7967252
Test

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>>8045651
>>8043413
Thanks again, I appreciate it.

LSP2:
>Is "Blue's" virginity supposed to be a surprise here?
Kinda. I implied it in the older caption, but since I didn't make it too obvious I figured "you" did not process the meaning at the time and figured it was some expression that referred only to "you". Was also a cute way to introduce Mosrael's virginity in a high school-esque "I don't want to be the only virgin in my group" way.

RSP5: Thanks. I got stuck here too, and in other parts regarding this narrative thing. It's my biggest weakness.

>>7987777
77/77 post m8

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>> 8043413
>>8046775

Thank you very much dude, i just woke up and seeing this before work, it's making me a big smile on my face!

Also, i will drop the orange one maybe in the
next thread to not overload you with requests!

Thanks and have a good day!

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This is my very first caption. I also just posted this on /aco/

Pearl peer-pressuring Peridot into sex

Looking to be graded, please

>>7967226
https://discord.gg/uhheUAu

link expired, new link up

night bump

Bumpo

>>8047914
Nice one! I haven't watched the show, but your caption has made me hard.

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Didn't do too much yesterday since I wasn't feeling too "inspired". Got some rest today, and I think I'm game for a proper batch like I normally try to do. Gonna' leave this one here before I head out in a moment. When I get back later today I'm going to look through some requests and such.

>>7970085
Something simple and short. I didn't really amp up the human on anthro, I guess I wasn't feeling it at the time. So sorry about that if you wanted something more risque.

>>8047914
Oh, and this was EXTREMELY lewd. Seems like SU is popular here. I should check out the show. Everything that keeps getting made for it turns me on to no end.

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Bump!

>>8020913
>>7982895
Bump

>>8047914
Pearl 2: "Breath" should be "Breathe" since she's telling Peri to breathe it in.
"Breathe it in: that's the musk of a human male."

>implying gems have nipples or vaginas

That aside, bretty gud. Some minor things here or there with regards to speech patterns/word choices, but again - minor things.
The breath is what really grinds my gears.

>>8051255
LSP4: Has > Had
Should have (past) implies had (past).

Ending's a tad repetitive, but not bad.
This is the kinda image that - if I weren't such a lazy ass when it comes to the booru - I'd tag as an actual "instruction" since it details the viewer doing real things to themselves a certain way. As opposed, that is, to "scenarios" or whatever you'd call em. Where it's just some good inspiration.

>>8053491
I was too busy trying to work the shitty windows paint to notice this, but yeah, noted

>>8051267
Same, man. Same

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>>8053491
Fixed that spelling error, but I really dont want to go back and change much else. I can probably come up with some more stuff later on, so I'll try to make more and do better

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>>8053683
Thanks again.

Yeah, I might go through some older ones and maybe do something like that on the booru. I could probably see the ones I made by eye and know whether they're "scenarios" or "instructions", and since I haven't made too many true JOIs I don't think it'll be TOO hard.

>Ending's a tad repetitive, but not bad.
Yeah, I agree. Changed it around a bit to be a bit better I think, though it is kinda' spicy for Kanga despite the situation. I should keep in mind that the last paragraph should be more lewd than the previous, or a "cooldown" pillow talk paragraph as a rule.

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>>8055515
>>8051255
>hass
Mmm...

>>8055515
I myself prefer a big finish at the end, but yeah. Either the final straw to carry us over the mountain, if you catch my drift, or some nice pillow talk (spicy or mild).

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old content bump

this place needs more xenos

>>7996684
>>7996892
requesting these cause rwby porn caps

>>8057754
*I also like to request this >>8045173

Does anyone still have that one of renamon and her daughter?

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New Splatfest! Tits vs Ass! Would you rather blow your load between Callie's melons (Tits) or slide your wiener between Marie's buns (Ass)? Spurt your "ink" on what you vote for

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>>8059172
>mfw I imagine people posting their tributes to the caption, their cum staining either side with their "vote".

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your shemale demon classmates want to paint eachother with cum and invite you to join in on the perverted fun. they want everyone involved to smell like cum

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>>7974317
Might be a bit awkward since I haven't done f/f before... I think.

Though if my knowledge on m/m is valid with f/f, it's that the predator "hunting" the straight one is always hot.

>>8058265
Don't know what that one is, but it sounds... Familiar, I think I might have seen it actually.

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>>8059708
>Fetish status: New acquired

I hope to see more of this!

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Bump: Good night edition.

>>8059708
Bretty gud, no suggestions here m8.

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>>8001263
I was always a fan of the dragonslayer spear in the Dark Souls series.

>>8060640
Night~

I'll try to write some more tonight for you to wake up to...I hope!

>>8060726
Awesome, I wasn't quite sure how it would work since FxF is kinda' new to me.

[ultraspoilers]and reading through Dee's captions for "inspiration" and understanding how they do their flow helps a lot too[/ultraspoilers]

Oh, and I'm up for more female POV requests if you guys are ever interested, among other requests I don't mind getting. Straight or gay, it doesn't matter.

>>8061257
>>8041024
Not sure what's specific about this, but am curious

>>8061190
You know, 90% of half-dragons wind up being created this way.

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More pandafuck

>>8061190
I'll get to this tomorrow. Night.

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I wanna see some switch dog.

night bump

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>>8060640
Bump: Good morning edition!

>>8061190
>dragons
>unf

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maybe something lewd with Link?

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bump

>>8061190
do you have the source for the original picture? I've been searching a few of my avenues trying to find it but can't.

>>8067408
Seems to come from this tumblr artist.
http://dragons-and-pronz-sketches.tumblr.com/post/143397505065/i-actually-have-been-doing-a-lot-of-jade-and-jake

>>8067438
Thank you

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>>8018026
Something kinda' experimental with bimbofication and narrative writing. I might expand this sometime in the future.

>>8068355
Not the guy that requested it, but that's good work.
I like the ones from the female POV as they slowly lose their minds if you get any ideas for future captions

>>8068454
>I like the ones from the female POV as they slowly lose their minds
Yeah, that was something I knew I was missing when I wrote this. I'll keep this in mind next time, perhaps with a more female centric POV.

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Maybe a descriptive account from Amalia's pov as she she summons little vine/brambles and tries to tentacle herself while the others are asleep.

Probably doesn't realise Yugo is watching, so no mention of him.

>>8068355
OR here, loving it!

>>8068971
Ayy, no problem. Gonna work on some more stuff later. Heading out atm, so I'll be back later.

I still want to do a proper marathon of stuff sometime. I really, really hope that's today.

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Anyone got anything for this?
Envy caringly jerking off the viewer and making him cum in his pants

bimpin

alright, I'm back. Going to get something to eat and then work today.

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(1/2)

>>8074360
The second one is 4.6M so I can't actually post it, But it's here https://e621.net/post/show/703978/2015-anal-anal_penetration-animal_genitalia-anthro

I really like the implications of these pics, I jerk off all the time to thinking about the setting that lead to these pics. What do you guys thing? Show me your spin on it.

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These are far from the best pictures of Star on the internet, but if you're wanting to write stuff from the female POV I think cuckqueen Star might be fun.
Or not, whatever.
But if you do them I'll probably post them in every Star vs. thread I see for a little while to piss off the shippers

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>>8074528

>>8061190
LSP1: If you don't feel like using a contraction here (Aren't you the brave knight) then I'd recommend going with just, "Are you the brave knight?"
While "Are you not" might be old-fashioned, it kinda comes across wrong if you ask me.
Oh boy, I'mgettingtoochivalrousforthisshit.png

LSP2: Hasty, not haste. Mean instead of bid.
"You adventurers are so hasty to assume that we dragons mean humans harm!"

LSP3: I'd recommend changing "might" to "seem to".
You seem to need persuading to change your opinions of us, am I right?
or
You need persuading to change your opinions of us, no?

LSP4: Mount this dragoness maybe?
Breeding partner? Concubine? Something other than repeating dragoness maybe?
"I am nothing but a willing mate, if you'll have me."

LSP5: "You came in here, moments ago, ready to fight tooth and nail against me..."
Something other than straight up murder perhaps?
"spear" maybe? To emphasize the wordplay? Unless of course she's into that, and wants a spear in her snatch.

RSP3: I'd italicize "ancestors" to get across that it's breathy or an exclamation.
Stud-sleeve? The fuck? Come on now...

Otherwise, very HOT. I can feel a BURNING in my loins. You're on FIRE lately. kek

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>>8075595
>>8061190
Awesome!

>Stud-sleeve? The fuck? Come on now...
RREEE, let me make it a thiiiing!
(fixed)

>Otherwise, very HOT. I can feel a BURNING in my loins. You're on FIRE lately. kek
Thanks, that means a lot. I was pretty impressed with this one, I think it clicked with me. That and the deathclaw one, too.

>>8068355
Might run out of room here? I'll try to keep suggestions short.

LSP1: I'd drop the "these"

LSP2: Change "these" to "the" Why even have the little bit of first person dialogue? You could've omitted it entirely.

LSP3: OK, more first person dialogue. Maybe consider second-person perspective? Though it'd be a major rework... Nevermind.

LSP8: Hunk of meat? Uh... Like it's asleep? Like it's numb? I've got nothing...

RSP1: Is she having trouble maintaining eye contact? She can't look us in the eyes? This is worded a little awkwardly as is - sounds like she's staring at us but is having trouble looking at us, which doesn't make sense. I'd recommend clarifying here. Is she having trouble keeping us in focus? Meeting our gaze? Meeting our eyes? Maintaining eye contact like I mentioned earlier?

RSP4: The view Miranda IS giving you. Present tense. I'd also recommend changing the perhaps for a maybe, since it works better with the final eh.

RSP6: The spectators need to form something, like a circle, audience, semi-circle, or some such. Otherwise it sounds like they're slowly taking form from the aether.
"...as an audience slowly started forming around your table."

RSP7: ...were pushed further and further away." Cheeks blushing brighter perhaps?

RSP8: So your cock is, not was. Tenses.
Might want to have some fun. I'd also drop the "huh".

I'm not sure I like the use of "woman" here. It's oddly generic, and not quite insulting enough. Bitch or something along those lines works better. Sow wouldn't though... Something that plays up her "heat" or lust or desperation. Like the female equivalent of stud. Maybe close with "bimbo" since that's the theme anyway? It'd be poetic, in a sense...

>>8074528
>cuckquean Star
Not even a shipper, but this meme needs to die in a fiery multi-car pileup along with all the NTR weirdos who infest this planet.

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>>8075868
>>8068355
>Maybe consider second-person perspective?
You mean keeping the description in the second-person sans the first-person dialogue? Like, instead of :"'I want you to go to the barn,' you say", it's "You tell her to go to the barn."?

I considered doing that here, but I wasn't quite sure.

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>>8045173

>>8076042
It's not even a meme. The creator said Star was based off of herself, and Marco was based off of her husband.

>and Marco has a reciprocated crush on another girl and constantly has other girls into him

What did she mean by this?

>>8076139
Yeah, there'd be no dialogue aside from hers. Anything else would be you, the author, instructing us, the audience, on what we do.

You slip X or Y into her drink
You inform her that
You tell her that
You make her X
No first person dialogue on our part, essentially. Just something to keep in mind. I'm a little busy at the moment but I'll write you up a sample for that image later tonight.

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>>7978412
More sharks planned, but I think this was the more simpler one to do.

>>8076139
"What brings a boy scout like you down here?" Mira says with a grin as she sits down at your table. "I thought you Peacekeepers stayed away from shady merc bars."

You bring a glass to your mouth and take a sip. The taste is strange and sweet...

You start in on Mira, insisting she stop pushing the new designer drugs that have been spreading throughout galactic bars and clubs lately. Xenogenic Dhumramic - a mind-altering substance - for example.

"Ah," she remarks nonchalantly. "I know a shakedown when I see one."

The woman reaches behind herself, into her leather pants, and produces a credit chit. She practically smashes it onto the table.

"They're harmless designer drugs dude. Just turn a blind eye and get over it, sheesh..."

It's not quite so simple. Your bosses want those drugs, and their dealers, off the streets. You're only here to warn Miranda. For now.

"Fuck. You." Mira grabs the drink from your hand and downs the shot before throwing the empty glass at your head. "You know where to find me, and my crew, so come and stop me if you have the balls!"

Her eyes wander around, lost, for a moment.

"Uhm..." she mutters, pressing a hand against her forehead. "What was in that...?"

You stand up and lean over the table, placing a hand against her cheek. It was a taste of her own medicine of course.
Guiding her mouth towards yours, you press your tongue inside her the moment the two of you make contact. Mira stares at you in shock, but doesn't stop you, and you continue to churn your tongue against hers.

You've always wanted to do that, you think. When you stop kissing the mutt, her tongue drops and hangs limply from her mouth. She's kinda cute when she blushes like that.


End Sample
Eh, it's kinda meh? But you get what I mean right? It's not for EVERY caption, but it's something to keep in mind and have in your back pocket.

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>>8022830
This one isn't too bad I think, despite its obvious it's simplicity.

>>8078855
Riiight. I get it, I get it. Thanks for the help, duderino.

This seems to work better in instances where your "target" needs to talk more (without "you" cutting in), such as braindrain and things. I'll be sure to keep this in mind when I work on some more bimbo/brain drain stuff.

Kinda' been getting a taste for it recently.

>>8076394
LSP3: Is there another way to handle the wrappings thing? Seems a little sudden and weird. Maybe throw in an "oops" to explain that he's in a hurry and made a mistake? Or did he? I honestly don't know what's going on.

LSP4: "You can't even begin to wait..." This sounds pretty awkward. Maybe use "patience" somehow?

RSP4: "You're going to cum soon anyway, so this way you can at least make it an impressive finish." Maybe?

RSP5: First sentence seems like some kind of deal/bargain being struck, so I'd suggest throwing in a "then" into sentence two.
"You want me to moan your name when you cum buckets inside me? Then thrust that cock right up against my womb and blast me with your sticky spunk!" etc.

>>8077647
LSP2: While I get the tap thing, didn't we jerk off onto her before? Seems more appropriate if she were drinking it from a glass or something. Or am I forgetting that she licked it up last time?

LSP3: Getting some bitches on it? While I get it, is there another way to phrase this?

RSP1: The "this bad boy" reads a little awkward. From the word choice it almost sounds like she's referring to herself, even though I know she's talking about "our" dick. While I like the flavour, a simple "you spurt in seconds" might fit better.

Really minor suggestions with maybe one or two expections, pretty solid overall.

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I don't suppose anyone would wanna do an intelligence loss and behavior modification caption? Y'know, like she can't help but start panting, talk funny, wag her ass, so on and so forth? The ears and tail can be just a buttplug and fake ears, or they can be real. Your choice.

>>8076139
RSP6: Should be, "...as an audience slowly starts forming around your table." Tenses.

RSP7: Ya goofed here: "...those thoughts were pushed away further and further away." Repeated away twice instead of just selecting one place.

>>8077647
>no chav slang
gg no re

>>8078939
P4: Burn the image INTO, not in.

Otherwise fine. I'm actually surprised to see they spell her name that way...

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>>8079106
>>8076394
Sweet, you're on fire with these edits too.

>>8079862
>patiency
u wot m8?

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>>8077647
>>8079184
LSP2: She wants to "drink from the tap" this time, since last time you only came on her. So she wants direct contact this time, though I suppose it goes from an implied BJ to sex later.

>>8079257
u wot m8

(I was considering it, but it would not have matched up with the earlier caption. Feel free to suggestion more chav sharks, I'm really like the idea.)

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>>8079892
>>8076394
Ah.

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>>8079236
>>8076139