ERP Thread Heartbreak Day Edition I guess Fuck life It's

>>7695921
This sounds like paul

>>7695921
Anon this cuts me real deep.

>>7695912
>Feeling as if he just ran a marathon, he hangs his head, panting for breath as he quakes in place. There were still aftershocks running through him as he squeezed her shoulder, and then began to let out loud, mirthful laughs.
H-holy shit...
>He was elated enough to forget about the "professional" nature of what had just happened, with his feet in a puddle of his own cum, and Mercy licking up what she had caught. It was a good thing she had milked him so thoroughly, or maybe a bad thing, since he had no energy to act on his sudden urge at that moment.
I mean...uh, good. I'm glad. H-how would I go around booking another appointment with you..?
>A little shrug.
Or, you know, maybe just a visit.

(Glad you had fun, since I did too.)

POST

CARDS

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>>7695951

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Happy Valentines Day.

>>7695951
Not yet.

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>>7695950
(I'm happy that you had fun as well, now I can't keep my eyes open, good night.)

>>7695918
(Are you this anon? >>7695793 I fucked up the message that wasn't for you, I didn't wanted to let you hanging but I can't keep my eyes open. I was already struggling with three anons because I was sooo tired that my head hurt. I need to sleep, have a good night anon.)

https://strawpoll.com/2w849xs

http://poal.me/i0sgoi

>>7696098
The Battle of Waterloo was fought on Sunday, 18 June 1815, near Waterloo in present-day Belgium, then part of the United Kingdom of the Netherlands. A French army under the command of Napoleon Bonaparte was defeated by two of the armies of the Seventh Coalition: an Anglo-led Allied army under the command of the Duke of Wellington, and a Prussian army under the command of Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher, Prince of Wahlstatt.

>>7696132
Hello Boris

https://strawpoll.com/bwesgwf
Keep your shitty polls to yourselves faglords
>HG

All the avas are currently sleeping. Please refrain from making any loud noise.

>>7696206
>anon crashes the moon into the earth

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>>7696206
>>7696220

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>>7696153
>all the votes are going towards the ones with harems

IT'S NOT FAIR

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>>7696220

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>>7696206
>>7696220

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>>7696220
>wakes up to see imminent death
... ara~

>>7696227
>>7696230
>>7696233
>>7696239

I'm sorry did that wake you up?

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>>7696206

>>7696229
I didnt know Lucas and Mecha had harems.

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>>7696227
>>7696229
>>7696233
>>7696239
>>7696243

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>>7696241
>

>>7696254
Jinx a cute

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>>7696229
Jiro go to bed
>>7696257
>Incoherent yelling

>>7696260
Jinx
A
Cute

C U T E
U
T
E

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>>7696229
>kissu
Chuuu~

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>>7696252
Oh, but they do. Last I remember, Lucas was still pretty popular in the main Discord. Unless he left and gave his harem to someone else, which, according to the poll numbers that are TOTALLY SKEWED IN EVERYONE'S FAVOUR BUT MINE, show that nope, they still love him over there. Must be his hat. I should get a hat. But then it'd ruin my sweet hair.

>>7696260
(I need to finish this thing which may land me a casual illustration gig. And then more FFXIV. Maybe I'll power nap when I'm done, I dunno)

>>7696268
H-hey! It's a monster girl! Why are you looking at me the same most girls look at me-

>And then the whiny swordsman was given a kiss, causing Kirito to leap backwards, doing a flip in mid-air and landing in the classic super hero pose a good ways away from the moth girl. During his flight, he drew his blade and it glimmered in the moonlight. Or at least it would but someone crashed the moon, so all the boy had to go by in terms of lighting was the shining light of the stars.

That was rather forward! Not unwelcome, but forward!

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>>7696241
>>7696253
>It was only a momentary lapse in slumber.

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>>7696267
REVEAL YOURSELF
>>7696286
Why did you wait till now
Sleep

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>>7696286
I'll never understand how a babby boi like Lucas can be popular, in the first place. The guy was pretty annoying from what I'd seen.

>>7696286
And Mecha?

>>7696302
Nah.

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>>7696317
Why

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>>7696326
Cuz

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>>7696302
(Because I hate drawing when other people are in the room. I was gonna sleep all of Valentine's Day anyway.)

>>7696311
It's probably running on the same logic the populace hold that apparently I have no chance in going against a shark toothed conqueror, a mage knight, and a former straw hat pirate that runs around hitting people with a bat. A bat! Who does that!?

>>7696315
Hentai doujin logic, my man. In the end, chicks are drawn to the big, old guys. Muscular guys. Guys with brains in the head of their crotch instead of the one on their shoulders. Guys like me and you? Apparently we never stood a chance in the grand scheme of things. ...wow, this place is terrible. What the hell!? Why am I here!?

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>>7696338
Do i know who it is

>>7696344
Possibru

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The Battle of Waterloo was fought on Sunday, 18 June 1815, near Waterloo in present-day Belgium, then part of the United Kingdom of the Netherlands. A French army under the command of Napoleon Bonaparte was defeated by two of the armies of the Seventh Coalition: an Anglo-led Allied army under the command of the Duke of Wellington, and a Prussian army under the command of Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher, Prince of Wahlstatt.

http://poal.me/i0sgoi
http://poal.me/i0sgoi
http://poal.me/i0sgoi
http://poal.me/i0sgoi

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"Hyah anons! Any of you wanna play?"

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>>7696347
Exchanging lewd for hint
>>7696340
Sleep schedule
Fix

>>7696366
Y-Yes! What game did you have in mind?

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Another day sitting alone typefucking each other?
God you degenerates are pathetic...

>>7696366
The Battle of Waterloo was fought on Sunday, 18 June 1815, near Waterloo in present-day Belgium, then part of the United Kingdom of the Netherlands. A French army under the command of Napoleon Bonaparte was defeated by two of the armies of the Seventh Coalition: an Anglo-led Allied army under the command of the Duke of Wellington, and a Prussian army under the command of Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher, Prince of Wahlstatt.

http://poal.me/i0sgoi

>>7696377
The Battle of Waterloo was fought on Sunday, 18 June 1815, near Waterloo in present-day Belgium, then part of the United Kingdom of the Netherlands. A French army under the command of Napoleon Bonaparte was defeated by two of the armies of the Seventh Coalition: an Anglo-led Allied army under the command of the Duke of Wellington, and a Prussian army under the command of Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher, Prince of Wahlstatt.

>>7696366
Are we gonna play video games? Do you have classic rock CD's in that bag of yours?

>>7696370
"Hmm... I dunno. What do you wanna play?"

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>>7696367
I'm afraid I can't do that Jo- I mean, Jinx.

>>7696377
I was, but then I saw your face back here and it reminded me there are people more obsessed for worse reasons and even pussier to admit it. Thanks for the early valentines gift.

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>>7696389
Hiiiint

>>7696383
"Not really, it's just mostly snacks in there, but I do have some games at home!"

>>7696384
"I'm always up for anything, though, I think I'd love to play some doctor with you, more than anything."
The man grinned, tilting his head in the girl's direction.

>>7696397
I'm really not much of anybody, honestly.

>>7696411
"Yeah okay. Are you the going to be the doctor?"

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>>7696419
I will know one day, jonx anon

>>7696429
U won't

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"Ugh, So full! Can I get a belly rub?"

>>7696432
I always fine rough draft stuff like this fascinating

>>7696420
Mhm! Unless you'd like to be doing the examining today?

seriously it's so weird how big my dick is

>>7696451
Thanks for the update rin

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>>7696444
c h e c k e d

>>7696451
>pulls out his sixteen inch cock (semi-erect) and starts waving it around

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>>7696451
Who else but the master Owain

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>>7696432
Sorry, many to be a animation.

>>7696464
that's nothing

check out THIS

>whips out his really really big dick, all the blood getting trapped in his enlarged member because it simply takes too long for it to circulate back to his brain, thus rendering him ded

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>>7696479

>>7696444
"No that's fine. So what should I do?"

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>>7696367
(I like my sleep schedule. I have plenty of hours I can actually have for myself and not have to deal with being watched all the time. By the way, Happy Valentine's Day, Jinx.)

>>7696492
She's asleep. This thread will likely 404 before she awakens. Did you do that on purpose?

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Hey anon; quick question, hope you don't mind: You haven't been fucking any Extra-Species have you? You know that's against the law, right?

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>>7696498
(Nah, I'm just caught up finishing inking this application drawing thing. I'm using this very tab to light my sketchbook actually)

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>>7696507
I AM THE LAW!

>>7696507
I, uh...Maybe one or two? They never told it was illegal to do so though!

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>>7696522
Actually I am; Mister Dreed. You're a little too early, it's only 2017.

>>7696525
Ohh woow, two? Anon...Anon Anon Anon...someone's in trooooouble!

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Hey folks, it's Valentine's Day, you know what that means.

Call me an idiot, but what's the difference between netorare and "reverse" netorare?

>>7696538
Grr...YOU CAN'T CATCH ME COPPER!
>The anon makes a break for it, running away from the extra-species agent.

>>7696543
We should show our love for America?

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>>7696550
>And just like that Mrs.Smith shoots a tranquilizer dart right into the anons back as he's booking it down the street
Anon...the least you could do is take it like a maaan! c'mon, it's only; Wait...was it life or just a couple of years. Huh, I forgot! Oh wellll, only one way to find out.

>>7696543
Sadposting at maximum, and asshurt reaching levels they shouldn't be able to?

>>7696570
>The anon could feel the dart prick his skin as it embeds itself in him. He was able to run for a bit more until the sedative effects of the dart take hold of him, causing his move to slur until he finally drops on the ground.

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>>7696556
Yes!

>>7696592
Also yes!

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>>7696570
I feel as though someone as carefree as you shouldn't have such dangerous weapons...

>>7696543
Chocolate!?

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>>7696570
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>7696601
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ITS NOT SAFE HERE
NOT WITH THEM

>>7696604
This is a whites only community.

>>7696615
>Kissus the wasp

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>>7696615
Holy shit the talking wasp.

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>>7696593
>The agent walks over to the anons body...and starts dragging him by the back of his shirt; across the pavement...fucking ouch
Time to atone for your crimes anon. Remembeeer, don't. drop. the. soap~

>>7696601
Oh please, I'm a professional! Nothing can possibly go wrong...unlessiforgettoturnoffthesaftywhichhashappenedseveraltimesnow.

>>7696615
Oh heeey, it's that wasp...I should probably do something about that.

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>>7696623
GAAAAH
THIS ISNT WHAT I WANTED

>>7696624
>>7696628
KENNY
SOMEONE I LIKE
>waspo hides behind the smol panda
KEEP THEM AWAY FROM ME

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>>7696635
>>7696628
Oh, huh, okay.
>The panda sleepily waves at the nearby...cop?
Please don't touch this wasp.

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>>7696615
Excuse me?! The only unsafe thing around here (b-besides Mrs. Smith) is thy temper! Don't go acting like I'm some kind of threat!

>>7696628
W-What was that just now...?!

>>7696628
>The anon could still see things despite the effects of the dart, although because everything appeared blurred, he thought he was in a hallucination. His body was too numb to even feel the pain of having his body dragged around, yet he could still feel the slightest of bumps against his rear. In an attempt to break away from his captor, he weakly holds on to Ms. Smith's wrist, trying in vain to pry it off his shirt.

>>7696635
>Reaches up to the wasp's head and flicks her feelers to and fro.

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>>7696651
YOURE THE ONE WHO STARTED SWINGING YOUR SWORD
KILLING MY WASPS
FOR NO REASON AT ALL
>angry buzz buzz
YOU ARE A THREAT
YOU ARE

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>>7696659
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>wasp reaches up and guards her antennae with her four claws.
DONT TOUCH THAT
THOSE ARE SENSITIVE
THAT HURTS

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>>7696635
Aw c'mooon! I'm just gonna deport you! Doesn't the waspie wanna go hooome?
>Her patronizing tone probably wasn't helping all that much, in fact if anything it probably makes it much much worse.

>>7696645
Nonononooo! I can't do that! you see I kinda got a jooob to doooo; and y'knooow she's an illegal immigrant, do you really wanna be harboring a criminal?

>>7696651
Hmm? Whaaat? I didn't say anything! Aren't you a little young to be going senile?

>>7696652
>She simply shoos away his hand as she continues dragging him towards the police station. She obviously wasn't going to stop for anything, after all she's gotta do her job, ain't no one wanna get fired'n shit.
Anooon, stop fighting it! or I'll have to administer even more force; and truuust me, you wouldn't want that, now would you?

>>7696671
But they look fun to play with!
>He moves around the wasp and hugs her wasp-like abdomen.

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>>7696660
SHUT YEH FUCKEN' MOUTH YEH CUNT!

>>7696679
>Upon hearing that he'd get shot more with those sedative darts, the anon releases his grasp on Ms. Smith's wrists, dropping it down to the pavement and letting it drag against it. He grumbles something out, put he's been too shot up with sedatives that it comes out mumbled and inarticulate.

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>>7696679
NO
NONONO
IM NOT GETTING DEPORTED AGAIN
>buzz buzz
YOU

>>7696681
>startled buzz
HEY
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
BE CAREFUL WITH THAT

>>7696687
WHY ARE YOU YELLING

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Give me your chocolate, nerd.

>>7696709
>Plants a chocolate-covered kissu on Parsley's lips.

>>7696708
BECUSE I CAN!

>>7696708
>The man has no regard for his or her own safety, wrapping his arms tighter against the wasp-like abdomen and nuzzling his cheek against it.
So smooth...

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>>7696679
>>7696708
I think a mistake was made here somewhere. This is not an illegal immigrant. She is my naturally born child, Mike.
>turns and pets the Wasp, though not touching the antennae.
Given that I am a legal citizen, my child is also legal.

>>7696709
>removes Parsee's tongue

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>>7696723
>Fucking dies.
>>7696716
>Takes the chocolate and runs.

(Offers the wasp an offering of honey)

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>>7696699
>Mrs.Smith stops in her tracks...then does a complete 180, deciding that it'd be easier if she drove him instead; cause this dude was seriously annoying to drag around. After a couple minutes of dragging his face all over the ground she heaves him up and just kinda tosses him into her back seat before shutting the door behind him and making her way to the drivers side.
Ahhh, much easier! dragging him was a total paain.

>>7696708
Now Now Nooow...There's no need to get all difficult. All you need to do to re-enter the country is to get a Visaaaa, m'kay? It's easy as pieee.

>>7696709
Jokes on you, I already ate it.

>>7696723
...
>Mrs.Smith shrugs, she didn't want to deal with it
Yeah, sure, whatever. Just don't let me catch your 'Child' again, or I'll have you both deported~

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>>7696730
>mounts the head on her wall and uses the body as a sex toy

>>7696741
Well, my mission here was a success.
>falls on the ground, asleep.

>>7696507
I think I fucked a hippopotamus yesterday. Or it could be my brother's wife. Am I in trouble?

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>>7696721
WELL YOURE BEING LOUDER THAN YOU HAVE TO
SO CANT YOU JUST BE QUIET????
I COULD HEAR YOU JUST FINE BEFORE

>>7696722
>angry and/or flustered buzzing
YOU SHOULDNT JUST BE BACK THERE
THATS WHERE MY STINGER IS
DONT GET YOURSELF STUNG
I DONT WANT TO STING YOU BUT
YOURE LITERALLY RIGHT ON IT

>>7696740
HEY
THAT LOOKS TASTY

>>7696741
GRRR
I WAS DOING THAT
BUT THEN THAT SPIDER TIED ME UP AND GOT ME DEPORTED

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>>7696660
NO REASON?! YOU WERE USING THEM TO ATTACK US! STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME OUT TO BE THE ONE AT FAULT!

>>7696679
B-But... nevermind...

>>7696741
>The anon could barely feel his body get dragged all around by this careless agent, as well as barely feel himself get tossed into the car. He was probably bleeding wherever his bare flesh has made contact with the pavement, but he didn't care at all, or at least he couldn't care with all the drugs in him. In the car, he was able to see the sky and building from out of the backseat window, causing him to smile dopeily and say
Ah...pwetty...

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>>7696760
YOURE THE ONE WHO GOT YOURSELF INVOLVED
I JUST WANT MY REVENGE
BUT YOU WERE GETTING IN THE WAY
BY KILLING ALL MY WASPS
GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

>>7696766
>Gently slaps thorax

lets get buzzin.

>>7696757
>Hearing the dangers of the nearby stinger, he instantly breaks the hug, and returns to the wasps front.
Ooh...Sorry about that.
>He wasn't about to stop hugging her, though, and instead of hugging her wasp-like abdomen, he reaches around to hug her human-like abdomen.

>>7696757
Whould you like some more honey?

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>>7696774
>>7696775
>>7696780
(sorry i'm too tired to go on.. I shouldnt have started but it was just too tempting)

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>>7696752
That's bestiality anon...and also not my department. You're good, just don't say that in front of any actual cops, m'kay? You might get in trouble.

>>7696757
Well do you have a Visa now? Could I perhaps see it? Unless your jipping me of course, then I'd have to deport you with extreeeme prejudiced

>>7696760
Yeeah, that's what I thought.

>>7696763
>The agent lets out a little laugh as she hears the dopped up anon say something. She starts up the car and gets driving, not really bothering to turn on the radio as that was an excessive amount of work she wasn't willing to put forth for some sub-par tunes...of course to make up for that she starts humming to herself.
Mhmm...Oh, and Anon, if you're somewhat there, maybe you should be thinking up an excuse right about now! you miiight be able to get out of it if you pull something out your ass.

>>7696782
>Drags away
You're mine now.

>>7696786
>With the car set in motion, the anon almost drops into the space between the seats, but rolls back onto his back safely. He could see the clouds move by as Ms. Smith spoke to him, her words barely having any meaning to him in his dreamlike state. He thought hard on an excuse to vindicate himself, but the more he thought of an excuse, the more his mind focused on the two monstergirls he bedded. The images of the two appeared much more lucid to him thanks to the dart, causing him to giggle happily.
They were pwetty. REALLY pwetty. Too pwetty for me to resist!

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>>7696766
DON'T INVOLVE US IN YOUR PETTY REVENGE! IT WAS SELF-DEFENSE!

>>7696786
(Mrs. Smith is too scary...)

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>>7696814
>Smith does her damnedest to impersonate the anon, putting on her own drugged up voice as she continues driving
Owh! Whelly Whelly pwetty? Pwetty enouwgh to bweak the laaaw?
>She breaks the impersonation after that, cutting right back to her serious...but not really all that serious voice
Anon, you could've just said no...or kept your mouth shut you know. Eh, guess it's too late for that.
>She proceeds to change the subject to something more...well this
Sooo, you ready to lose your anal virginity anon? Who do you think it's gonna be? Jamel? Jose? Bartholomew? Come on, shoot me some names here!

>>7696816
(Whew, that close. Almost told her about the times I forgot to turn on the safety...she could've reported that then I could be out a job!)

>>7696827
Yesh! Wheelie, wheelie pwetty!
>The anon had regain some control of his muscles, but the most movement he could perform was rolling side to to side on his back, which he did while talking to the agent. When he hears her say something about law breaking, he frowns and looks at her from the car mirror.
Hey! I shed that they neva told me about no lawsh!
>He return his gaze back onto the clouds, their fluffy appearance making him forget about all that legal stuff and cheering him up once more. Too focused on the clouds to pay proper attention, he once again hears her speak out, with names being listed consecutively. Having no idea why she spoke, the anon decides to pick out the funniest sounding one.
Barshalomew shounds nicesh!

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>>7696859
Ohhohohoo man! I bet they totally set you up! I bet those chicks are super venomous! Sucks to be you dude.
>She laughs to herself as she spitballs reasons as to why he didn't know....chances are they just didn't tell him; which seems a little weird to her as it's a pretty big thing...and the center of a lot of complaints that she didn't bother actually reading
Ohh? You want a Bartholomew? I think we got one too...huh, well you might just like that then!
>She knew full well he couldn't understand a single thing she was saying, but that really didn't stop her from having her fun
You are just the most adorable little law breaker, you know that?

>>7696882
Yesh! Barshalomew! Barshalomew!
>Upon hearing himself be called adorable, the anon smiles even wider, and starts to happily roll himself to and fro on the backseat. He stops momentarily to look at her through the car mirror, and says
Shanks! You...You're pwetty cute too!
>after which he continues to roll about until he gets stuck between the gaps of the seat.

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>pass out in despair at about 3 AM
>try to chill out and go buy drinks
>see couples
>feel worse than before as soon as I get back home
Fuck.

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>>7696898
>After a couple of minutes they finally arrive at the police station, miss Smith tells the cops about what the anon said and just kinda...walks him to his cell and locks him in there, like a any good...'cop'?
Now you stay here, m'kay? We'll get this all sorted ouuut.

>>7696906
You know what you cooould do? Drink! Drink until you can't feel your toes! It's what I do every Valentines day.

>>7696917
I don't drink alcohol. No wonder I don't have a girlfriend.

>>7696925
What a square

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>>7696925
Wow; maybe you should change that?

>>7696917
>As the anon still had a considerable of sedatives in him, he can barely make out the gist of what's happening to him as he's walked to his cell. The dingy appearance of his surroundings was made much more appealing thanks to the drug, As Ms. Smith leaves to talk with the other cops, he waves both hands at her and says
Baaaaaaaaaiiiiii~
>before he stumbles onto the bench and leans against the cell's wall.

>>7696932
Not planning to.

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>>7696943
>She waves goodbye to the anon as she leaves the police station...well that was one whole thing done, good enough for her! She's gonna go home and masturbate! Masturbate and drink...just like other day.

>>7696946
Aww c'mooon! I could use a drinking buudddyy!

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>>7696955
>Just like other day
Th-That's supposed to be 'Every other day'.
Just fuck my shit up.

>>7696955
I'm sure you'll find a drinking buddy better than I could ever be.

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>>7696963
Aw c'mooon! Don't saaay that! I bet you'd be a great drinking buuudddyy!

>>7696955
(Heh, that was fun. Thanks for playing with me Ms. Smith.)

>>7696973
Hell no. Even if I did start drinking, I'd probably get drunk after like, one beer, then start saying embarrassing shit and making an ass out of myself.

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>>7696977
(Noo problem anon-kun. Glad you had fun with that little scene.)

>>7696994
Half the fun of a drinking buddy is seeing them get shit faced after a couple of cans! I'd be able to do all sorts of shit to you and you wouldn't even knooow-Ohhh did I just say that out loud?

>>7696994
You just gotta know your limits anon. Find out how much drinks it takes you to blackout, then stop whenever you get close to it.

>>7697006
That wouldn't even be a couple, that'd be one. Besides, what sorts of shit would you even do?

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>>7697019
Use your head anon, It isn't that hard to put two and two together~.
>Of course she meant drawing profanity's and dicks all over his face...but she was making it sound as suggestive as possible

>>7697027
Yeah, uh, no thanks.

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>>7697030
Eh, It was worth a shot.
>She gave up so easily!

>>7697036
Guess it was. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go be all depressed and shit.

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>>7697041
Alrighty! Have a good Valentines. The offer will always be there by the way.

>>7697049
Believe me, it's anything but good.

And such ends the ballad of the average anon

Hello ERP. How are you doing? Kool like a Corpse?

>>7697121
Maybe.

>>7697121
Some of us might be corpses by tonight.

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>>7697121
I'm already a corpse.

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>>7697121
(This FFXIV Garo event is going to be the end of me. I finally get a fool set of BRD gear and I see that NIN gets to be ZERO and I'm all like "YOOOOO I NEED THAT" and now I'm back at it again. I need 60 wins anyway.)

>>7697170
Don’t see today as Valentine only. The Church has assigned it to Cirillo and Metodio too. Therefore is a day like the other, don’t be a corpse for that Anon. And romantic love is so overrated anyway. Give me Storge over Eros all the time.

>>7697184
(I've played only RO and RO2 in my life so I don't know what you are talking about. But good luck with that.)

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>>7697194
>And romantic love is so overrated anyway

(And yet for some of us it's what keeps us going, no matter how unrealistic or even impossible that dream is. Anyway, BRD and NIN are the Bard and Ninja classes respectively and basically I need to do PVP to get Garo themed gear.)

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>>7697184
I'll resub when there's a Kamen rider crossover. Until then, I'll be staying away from balmung, grinding, and xiv in general until about a month prior to stormblood.

>>7697203
(What keep us going is mostly oxygen and water. You know the rule: 3 minutes without air, 3 day without water. I’ve been without Eros for most of my life and I’m still alive. Good luck with your Garo thing then.)

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>>7697215
>ll be staying away from balmung
>hides his server

>>7697223
(I've never heard that rule before actually. But thank you.)

>>7697235
It's the only place for degenerates like us, sadly. You never run out of the futa cat girls, and fellow cat boys/shreks trying to get in your pants, but you get used to it, I guess.

Who else was here last year when every ship except Jiro x Elizabeth/Ragyo was sunk?

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>>7697049
>holds the palm of her hand
Well arn't you the lucky lady, Miss America.

POST BUTTS

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>>7697408

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>>7697408

>>7697436
Spooky.

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>>7697399
Japanese actually, but what does that matter, amirite?

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>>7697436
Those feet...

>>7697408

No, boobs!

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>>7697459

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>>7697459
Boobs as requested.

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>>7697459

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>>7697451
It explains your accent well Miss Japan. Your job sounds like a heaven to me, away from all these.. people.
>The male lookalike sits down next to a wooden table, littered with plates and mugs.
Coffee?

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>>7697465
>>7697471

Cow tits

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>>7697459

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>>7697480

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>>7697476
Eh, I mean it's alright. Pays like nobodies business so I'm not complaning. Ohhh, some Coffee would be greeaat! I haven't had a cup all morning.
>The Agent really doesn't seem to mind the strange look alike; in fact she looks just as laid back as ever.

>>7697480
I bet you prefer gigantic asses you mongoloid.

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>>7697408

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>>7697490
>He looks at her legs briefly whils't making coffee for the two of them. "Is this program meant to be beautiful?" He thought, is this his replacement? The latest model?
>The two of them were polar opposites in almost every way.
Your name?

>>7697504
>smacks that ass and bends the fuccboi over face down, ass up.

Post buttholes I can fap to

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Well, Happy Dying Alone Day everyone.

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>>7697530

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>>7697516
>She relaxes in her seat; calmly crossing her legs as she lets out a quiet sigh
Mrs.Smith, pleasure to meet you.

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>>7697521
"It's too early for this shit but go ahead cutie~"
>chat bends against the wall wiggling his ass at the anon waiting for him to shove his dick in and go to town

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>>7697530
To me, my trusty steed! We shall ride towards the horizon and find our waifus before the day ends! Or we can just go to Taco Bell and stuff ourselves with nachos and Doritos Locos Tacos, wash those bitches down with gallons of Baja Blast and then get kicked out for refusing to sing "Living La Vida Loca" properly.

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>>7697525

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>>7697538
>His suspicions were confirmed, still the uptight man played it off as nothing, pouring the woman her coffee.
That's odd. My name is that too. Mr Smith.

>>7697542
>he shoves his throbbing dick in, pulling chat closer , thrusting balls deep inside the slut

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>>7697548
Ohhh? Really now? The world's an awfully small place isn't it?
>The woman lets out a little laugh. Obvisouly she's unaware of the mans origins and honestly she doesn't really care that much

>>7697544

Whooooa buddy. I may be down, but I still don't hate my body enough to eat Taco Bell.

>>7697530
We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and—in spite of True Romance magazines—we shall all someday look back on our lives and see that, in spite of our company, we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely—at least, not all the time—but essentially, and finally, alone. This is what makes your self-respect so important, and I don't see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness.

>>7697557
(Sorry I would have loved to continue that valentines day gag but I have to go)

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>>7697563
What if we went to one of those hybrid Taco Bells that also had a Pizza Hut inside them? Do Chocobos even like pizza? They better.

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>>7697530
>tfw you are finally not alone on Valentine's Day

(Feels good man)

No buttsluts around to fuck is there?

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>>7697544
i want taco bell

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>>7697554
"Someones a horny lil slut today."
>Chat slams his ass against the dick his balls flapping in his suit moaning at every thrust.

>>7697585
Are you Blake?

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>>7697587
no i'm not.

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>>7697573
(It's all good my man. Have a gucci day)

>>7697580
>Sends a box filled with tacos

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>>7697580
See, Boco? We're off to a great start already. You sure you're still against Taco Bell? The lady wants Taco Bell, are you sure you're going to turn down the requests of a lady? A cute one at that? Alright, Mary. Just hop on, grab a hold of well-built abdominal muscles and we'll go right on over to Taco Bell on this chocobo here. Don't worry about him, he doesn't have a choice. I fed him Gyshal greens.

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>>7697608
i dont want tacos
take your box back

>>7697611
>sits on the bird thing
lets go im hungry

>>7697611
>>7697631

Sigh...

At least I'm useful.
>trots down the road

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>>7697631
>>7697635
>with a smirk as smug as ever, Kirito steered Boco the Chocobo down the street, riding gung-ho style as he forced the poor horsebird to face oncoming traffic only to jump over the vehicles at the very last minute. That was how he got his sick kicks. Fortunately, thanks to a chocobo's natural speed, they arrived in due time at the local Taco Bell, where Kirito pulled up at the drive thru window where he placed his order.

I'll have two number 9's, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45's, one with cheese, and a large soda.

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>>7697647
We serve food here sir

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>>7697652
>squints

Squarepants. I hear talk you make a mean Krabby Patty.

Thread theme
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0xeCgry3nE

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>>7697635
transportation doesnt talk

>>7697647
after shadow's done ordering, i'll have 10 loaded potato grillers

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Good morning

>>7697714
Good Morning

>go to sleep for a few hours
>it's Valentine's Day
>aunt is dead

Anyone wanna beat me up????

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>>7697692
Welp. Looks like the bird's dead. Let's sell him at the KFC next door and eat our food inside.

>>7697722
gtfo Boco

>>7697720
I'm sorry for your loss, anon.

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>>7697726
sounds good to me

>>7697779
>>7697726

And they ate their meal in peace while Boco's corpse rotted in the parking lot.

And they all lived happily ever after. The end.

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>>7697719
Hello there, anon. How are we doing today?

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>>7697779
>After selling Boco's body to the nearby KFC (where they were paid a whopping 50 col), Kirito walked with Mary into the Taco Bell, where they enjoyed their order. At least, Kirito enjoyed his order. He spent most of the date just ranting about how much better he was than everyone else when he wasn't chewing. The boy didn't even stop to ask Mary one single question about her, some date he was! By the time he was done, he simply stood up and began to walk out without even bothering to tuck in his chair.

So, hey, this was fun. We gotta do it again sometime, y'know? Don't send me a friend request, I delete them all automatically. I know where to find you, don't worry about it. See ya!

>And that was Kirito's amazing, wonderful, splendiferous Valentine's date.

(Really really sorry but I'm about to collapse. I am going to go to sleep. Have a good night, Mary!)

>>7697798
I'm doing okay miss Morrigan. Just a day like the others. How are youdoing?

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>>7697791
something smells bad but not bad enough to distract me from this delicious taco bell

>>7697800
>Mary eats her grillers whilst Kirito's boasts go in one of her ears and out the other. By the time he left, she only then realized he was talking.
wuh
oh
uh
goodnight
>And then she continued getting fat on grillers.

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>>7697806
This day is just like Halloween for me. You know, go out, scare some males and milk their sperm.

>>7697842
I see what you mean there. Well good luck with your harvesting then. I’m sure you will be utterly satisfied by the end of the day.

>>7697842

But you aren't scary.

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Where da futas at?

>>7697875
Sorry, we are out of futa at the moment. Try later.

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>>7697875
Futa?
u
t
a
?

Is Hotarumaru here?

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>>7697875
(Somewhere around hopefully)

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>>7697892
>>7697875

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>>7697865
Hohoho but I can be.

>>7697852
Thank you anon, I will. You hope you enjoy your day as well, remember to have a very delicious meal today.

>>7697899
>Head pats
Morning lewd maiden

>>7697907
I'll try miss Morringan.

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>>7697914
>He nuzzles into the pets
Good morning anon. Slept well?

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>>7697922

>>7697922
>Rubs dick against butt

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Happy Valentine's Day my new copy of Sonic Rush just got here

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>>7697895
I could pass a message on if you'd like!

>>7697922
Not bad, you?
>Kisses head

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>>7697929
Huh?
>>7697931
>Shivers lightly
L-lewd...
>>7697941
>His cheeks grows a bit red from the kiss
I slept decent, but that was hours ago.

>>7697936
Nobody cares, you fat ugly spic attentionwhore

>>7697938
Tell him to pop in hea when possible.
Also good valentines to you too cute Midare.

>>7697958
This is the same thing I was thinking about.

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>>7697963
Okay~! Thank you, anon! Have a nice Valentine's day!

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Happy don't fucking kill yourself day.

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>>7697987
>kissu on the cunny

>>7697987
Good I-don't-care-enough-to-kill-myself day too DMG.

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>>7697895
>>7697963
Message delivered, I've been summoned in the lands of unrestrained debauchery. Greetings.

>>7697987
My birthday was yesterday and today is Valentine's Day so I was hit with a double-whammy at birth.

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>>7697987

Too late.

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>>7697987
U-um, thanks... I suppose.

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Valentine's day is my favorite day! This is the moment where I can be with anon the wholee daaaay!

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>>7698010

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>>7697987

>>7698017
you're really sweaty
i like that

>>7698017
Oh fuck yes, are you here to give us some love nectar?

>>7698017
>Sneak away from the Anna.

>>7698017
I hope Anna forces me to lick and fuck her ass....

That's the best way to show your love after all...

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>>7697998
>Kisses daughter on the NOSE!

>>7697999
Awesome!

>>7698008
At least you know you weren't made on Valentine's day!

>>7698010
Chicken friend nooooo! D:

>>7698011
And an EXTRA happy Valentine's day to you!

>>7698026
Still got that saved <3

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>>7697958
Oh the edge

How will i go on

On this holiday of holidays

The knowledge that i'm only one of those helps

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>>7698002
>Miyafuji blushing from toe to hair hopped nervously towards the little sword, coming to a halt in front of him before bringing her arms from behind her back in front, revealing a heart shaped chocolate container. Offering it to the sword boy with a wide grinning smile.
Happy Valentine's day Hotarumary!~

>>7698048
>those

Ugghhhnn

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>>7698048
>pets on hat

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>>7698048
>Ruka blushes as DMG wishes him happy valentine
T-thank you DMG! L-likewise.

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>>7698030
You wanna lick it? Yes? You need to love my whooleee body!

>>7698031
Yes! I've been concentrating my love for anon for the last couple of days to fill looots of bottles with my love nectar.

>>7698036
Heyoooo anoooon, where are youuuu.

>>7698042
But I don't neeed to force you anon. Nope I don't! Since you love mee soo much that you'll do it right away the moment I am near you. Please lick my pussy and taste my love juicess!

>>7698073
>He licks his lips.
Yes, Anna. I'd love to lick it all off. I'll lick your entire body, head to toe!

>>7698073
Anna a cutie.

>>7698073
>Like a true master thief the Anon kept skulking away, a mere shadow among other shadow, away from here because it was time to go back to home for him.

>>7698073
>Anon backs away when met with Anna's Love Vision

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>>7698073
>(Heart pupils
Hnng... The best)

Stay out of my threads.
>HG

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>>7698088
Why not you start right now, anon? My body is waiiitiinngg ~
>Anna sits on a nearby couch, spreading her legs for anon, flashing her panties for him

>>7698098
I love you too anoon, we should make love together!

>>7698100
>Suddenly Anna was in front of anon, blocking his way with two of her arms spread
Give me a big huug, big boy.

>>7698112
Anooon I have a bottle specially for youu, this will fill you with my love... ~
>She grabs one of the bottles inside a bag she was carrying around and stretches her arm to give him the bottle full of ''water''

>>7698127
Are you a boy or a girl? My love belongs to anon either way!

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>>7698152
I-I am a boy miss.

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>>7698053
>Hotarumaru stays in pure amaze for seconds after the present is revealed before his green eyes. Struggling to come with a decision if he should either take the chocolate or embrace Miyafuji, the samurai comes to a conclusion. Both.
Ohhh! My first Valentine chocolate from a maiden...!
>After taking the heart-shaped box, the albino swordsman tightly hugs the adorable girl in front of him before releasing her.
To think I'd be remembered to this day and receive a gift, thank you!

>>7698152
>The anon's eyes widen a little at her words, his face begins to blush deeply before stuttering a bit in his next answer.
O-oh well i-i wouldn't mind that...but isn't it better to do that after a d-date Anna?

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>>7698053
>>7698165
Oh! So cuteee~! Get a room, you two!

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>>7698200
We don't need a room to eat chocolate, Midare.
>Hotarumaru is already devouring the contents inside the box.

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I'm going to steal your heart, Anonymous!

>>7698152
>He has a visible bulge in his pants.
W-Well, alright.
>He gets on the couch with her.
Where should I start?

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>>7698165
>Miyafuji sighed from relief on Hotarumaru's shoulder as he hugged her tightly, returning the hug with same passion from the affection she had for the boy.
Ehehee.~ Hope you like it, I made it myself! Not that I'm very good at it..
>She laughed at herself with one hand raised, scratching back of her head.
Of course I remember you!.. You're important to me after.. all...
>Last words were eaten away to mumble levels.

>>7698137
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Wow great post
Here's your (You)

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hnanppy valentine's day
>kissus thread
we're all gonna make it
ok bye

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>>7698244
>The tasty brown sweats disappeared one by one from the heart-shaped packing into his mouth. Distracted by his busy tastebuds savouring the cocoa, Hotarumaru didn't process the very last of her sentence, busy with this teeth crushing the chocolate as he smiled.
Mnn! I didn't get the last part but these are very nice!
>Soon enough no chocolate was left in the box.

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>>7698317
>She watched excitedly hands in front of her together in fists as he made the handmade contents vanish steadily from the box, gleaming with joyous giggling.
>Given the compliment and empty box results she smiled as wide she ever could.
Yaay, great success!~

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(I had to go to the store and feed my puppy.)

>>7698168
A date? We.. we can have a date. I can show you how muuuuchhh I love you in our date, anon! Then we are going to fuck like bunnies!

>>7698236
Lick my pussy! The most sacred place right away!
>Anna gets on the couch, laying on it as she spreads her legs for the anon that was sitting right next to her. For some reason her cunt was already very moist with a very noticeable wet spot.

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>>7698279
Happy Valentine's day, you too!

>>7696507
Does it count if I was raped?

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>>7698445
enjoy yourself with boco :^)

>>7697842
I volunteer

>>7698472
Huh? Why him?