Whales are fucking stupid. Can you mention one whale in the history

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Whales are fucking stupid. Can you mention one whale in the history of mankind that has had a record in the top ten? Can you? Can you mention one whale who's written the equivalent of, er, 'Othello', Shakespeare, 'Health & Efficiency'? They've produced nothing in the way of literature. All they've fucking produced is a load of other whales and all they eat is fucking plankton, and they call them intelligent. Can you imagine drifting along in the sea with your mouth open and a lot of fucking plankton going in?
You'd like it, would you, just drifting around in the sea? And they're such cunts they can't even breathe underwater. They have to keep coming up the whole fucking time and spouting.
Then some cunt comes on telly and he says, "Oh, the whale is being wiped out by mankind, save the fucking whales." Well, during the war, did we notice a lot of whales rallying round and saying, "Save England!" I didn't notice many down my part of the world. I didn't see whales coming up with Union Jacks saying, "We'll fight the bosch". No, they were doing fuck all - swimming around the fucking sea sucking fucking plankton down