ITT: Pokemon are real. Who's your favorite pokegod?

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>>7647844
Me.

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>>7647844
Me.

*yawn*

>>7647846
Cuuuuuuuute.
>Kiss the bf.
>>7647851
See yaa.
-Stitches

marshmallow is made for rape

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>>7647844
...
>Cough™

>>7647874
Shushhh.
>Smooch the Stitch

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>>7647862
How'd you sleep?

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>>7647895
Mmm. Was a good catnap. What'd I miss?
>Look down at the books Victini has open. How far had he gotten?

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>>7647844
Zekrom.
>>7647884
>Cross internet what the hell stare

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>>7647844
The nameless one.
>>7647890
Do you need a drink?

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>>7647844
Any god willing to help with Where in the World is Blue, you will be rewarded in fujoshit tears.

>>7647837
Hell yea

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>>7647890
>>7647874
>Concerning noises
Hey, cool. Water is coming out.
Guys, I made a pool!

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>>7647844
Dialga.
>>7647862
Sorry, I hope 'chu don't take it personal.

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>>7647905
>Now he had a book of notes along with all the other books.
>He had gotten through about five. Out of about five thousand.
Nothing much. Been studying.

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>>7647890
>Smoooooooch.
>>7647931
A pool?
>Check that shit oooout.

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>>7647934
Eeh's fine, Dialga's a cool cat. Dragon. Whatever.

>>7647937
>The mew nods, taking a peek through the notes.
Mmh, sounds good. Best to know your people after all...

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>>7647922
No thank you, not thirsty.

>>7647948
>Caaaasually hold hands and come with to check out the pool

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>>7647929
That sounds like Palkia's idea of fun, if he could be persuaded.
>>7647934
Hey, bro. I found where the liquor's kept, want to drink and watch a movie?

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>>7647948
>>7647972
>A large, several foot deep depression has been smashed into the floor in one of the rooms
>A broken plumbing pipe is filling the hole with water
This is okay, right?

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>>7647972
>>7647931
>>7647989
A pool? Can I come?

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>>7647989
...
Something tells me that that's not okay.

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>>7647972
>Kissu that boyf.
>>7647989
Uhhhhhhhh...
I mean- Noooooo...

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>>7648012
>Kiss the King

>>7647989
..why.

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>>7647966
If you need to go you can head out. I'm mostly going to be reading.

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>>7647937
That's a lot of history to go through, especially of the old times.

>>7647983
I would be lying if I wasn't thinking of him as well.

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>>7647998
Sure.

>>7648006
>>7648012
>>7648029
Are you sure?
>Pool starts to overflow
>Crawdaunt swims around it
It's pretty nice.

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>>7648037
Nah, it's fine. Nothing really calling me.
>She blinks
...I mean, unless you WANT me to go.

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>>7647929
>>7647983
im convinced
ill port him around
just to watch fangirls cry :^)

>>7648029
...
>>7648063
Should we make an offshoot thingy or something?
-Stitches.

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>>7648063
oh my fuck
>Go shut off the pumps

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>>7648063
...Yeah, I'm starting to get sure.

>Bear jumps in to try and fix pipe
>Oh hey, a reason to use this pic
>Rollan for ability to fix pipe

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>>7648071
I just was wondering.
...
>Back to reading and taking notes.
Sorry about that thing I did...

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>>7648082
Cool idea.
>Starts hammering out a secondary portion of the pool

>>7648085
>The pipe is broken in half
>Fixing it might be a problem...

>>7648083
>Water keeps flowing out, due to residual pressure

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>>7648083
>>7648085
>>7648063
>Appears in the water.
>Roll to fix the pipe.

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>>7648113
NOT IN THAT WAY!
>Roll to fix it somehow.

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>>7648097
>Now, to understand what's going through the Mew's head, you have to realize that she's eons old
>A handful of politicians is forgivable to her
...It's fine. You learned. It's still going to take a bit of time and energy to clean up all the way, since... well, to be honest, that mass brainwashing thing was more of a patch... but we'll figure it out.

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>>7648117
HA! SUCK IT FAKER! WATCH A PRO!
>>7648130
>Fix pipe

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>>7648078
Hell yeah, thanks.
The next days/weeks are going to get real interesting.

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>>7648144
I still can't believe we did that.
>He sighs.
Booooooy.
>>7648059
I'm trying to get everything.

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>>7648146
..Thank you.

>>7648130
>>7648117
>>7648113
>>7648085
Alright, everyone out of the water. Pool's closed.

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>>7648130
>>7648117
>>7648113
>>7648085
>>7648146
>Tree comes along on his guard route around the castle
>looks at all the water
>looks at bones
I am Tree
>Tree uses Forrests curse on bones
>continues on patrolling like nothing happened

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>>7648193
Yes sir.

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>>7648193
>Dives to the bottom of the "pool"
This is pretty nice...

>>7648146
Apologies. I do not bear the blood of the true Helix.
>>7648193
>Leave in shame.
-H3 (Omastar)

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>>7648193
>>7648201
>Flop in the dirt.
Let the Earth consume me.

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>>7648184
Hey, forgive me. It was literally the only thing I could think of doing to calm the Unovan populace without tossing you under a bus at the same time. If it makes you feel better, I'm not really happy with that solution either.

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>>7648215
Unless you want to be dinner, I would suggest getting out of the water soon.
>Flame wheel the pool

>>7648220
You're fine, you tried.

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>>7648258
OW.
>Jumps out of the boiling water
Dude, what was that for?

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>>7648248
...
Did I help at least a bit?

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>>7648280
While I didn't mean to hurt you, that's for wrecking the room and flooding the place.
I'm boiling the water off.
>Flame wheel intensifies

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>>7648248
You might also want a more permanent solution than the brainwash. If it's anything like getting mindwiped, that process isn't perfect and some people might start remembering or questioning and I'm not really in the mood of having pokemon rights setback decades because of Victini's poor impulse control, or any other reason.

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>>7648305
I was making a pool...
>Grumbles

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>>7648312
Which you could have done outside much easier and without destroying the plumbing. It's fine though.
>Boy howdy that's a lot of steam.
>Flame wheeeeel

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>>7648312
>>7648305
>Tree walks right through the boiling 'pool' as he continues his patrol route

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>>7648312
Please be more careful in the future.

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>>7648340
I was being careful...

>>7648337
And I tried digging outside.
The sand kept falling into the hole.

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>>7648281
Yep. Wouldn't have been able to brainwash that many people on my own without passing out.
...
Although ah, if you're talking about if killing the president and his entourage helped any... that'd be a no. Like I said, more than half the nation voted for him. You may have made some people happy, but you made a lot of people very, very upset.

>>7648309
...I said it was a temporary fix. It's going to start slowly unraveling as the brainwashed people interact with non-brainwashed people and uncover information. I...
...

I'm honestly stumped as to a more permanent solution, short of asking Giratina himself to bring back the people you killed. I'm sorry.

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>>7648357
..There's rocky areas too. Try making one in one of those.

>Just about finished
>One last flame wheel

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>>7648360
I'll be more careful. Thank you for the help.
>Back to studying.

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>>7648405
...
But where do I get water for it?

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>>7648496
You're a water-type, Punchy.

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>>7648496
We have hoses, so, yeah.
Also what Ted said.
>Hop down into the hole and acquire welding goggles from goodie bag
>Get to work on that pipe

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>>7648496
Can't you make water?
>>7648526
>Watch the Bones.

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>>7648408
>The mew nods and sighs, cuddling up to the studying Victini... trying to think of some way to keep the Unovan populace from tearing down Liberty Island and setting back Pokemon rights 100 years.

>...Although it would be nice to set Pokemon rights back around, say, three thousand years. Back then they were just straight-up equals.

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>>7648513
>>7648526
>>7648529
I'm not a blastoise, okay?
I don't magically make water. I store some in my body, enough to use crabhammer and stuff, but not enough to fill an entire pool.

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>>7648553
>He grabs a blue TM
Fiiine. Show me where you want your pool.
We're doing it a bit away though.

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>>7648553
..I've seen a wooper fill a pool before though.
And then drown someone in it, but that's irrelevant.
>Pipe's fixed
>Climb out of the hole and stuff goggles back in my bag

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>>7648563
...
>Sighs
>Looks around outside the castle for a suitable pool spot
Not much rock around here.

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>>7648596
>>7648588
>>7648563
>Tree walks past carrying two large buckets of water

>>7648588
...Creepy.
>>7648596
>>7648615
Let's try a bit further away.
>Keep searching.
-Stitches

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heeeey~
is sylvie still up?
i dont see her around here
i was gonna invite her to something

>>7648619
>Roll for pool location
>Evens, they find a nice little outcrop of rock, a couple dozen feet away from the castle
>Odds, nothing but sand and vertical rock faces

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>>7648596
>>7648619
Maybe look up on the plateau above the castle?
Probably not too much sand up there.

>>7648652
>>7648662
Fooooound one! Hows this?
-Stitches

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>>7648696
Hmm...
Good enough, I guess.
>Starts punching a hole into the ground
>After a couple minutes, he finishes, and crawls out
How do you plan to fill this?

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>>7648705
Well Tree's gonna help hopefully.
Buut.
>He uses the TM and the blue color fades.
>He hops into the middle of the hole.
>Stitches used Rain Dance!
>Effectiveness roll.
>Evens/Dubevens: He good at this, it'll be full in 5-20 minutes.
>Odds: light shower, gonna take a few hours.
>Dubodds: Literally one drop falls from the sky.

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>Shiny leaves Fushiafags house and having frown bored of the potential fucks avaliable there
>He later perishes having frozen to death attempting to fuck a Vanilluxe in the middle of a snowstorm

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>>7648717
...
Well...that works, but it's gonna take a long time.

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>>7648769
I'll give it another shot I guess.
>Stitches used Rain Dance.
>Evens: About 30 minutes until it fills.
>Odds: Well, about two hours at this point.

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>>7648788
>A massive downpour is summoned
>The pool fills up in minutes...
>And overflows
>Crawdaunt swims around in it
Thanks, man.

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>>7648839
No problem.
>He sits by the edge.
So, you thinking about staying?

>>7648868
Well...you guys seem nice enough.
Guess I'll stick around, and see how things turn out.
-Crawdaunt

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>>7648893
If you ever get stir crazy we can send you out on missions or something...
>He scratches his chin.
Liiiike... Collecting scrap or like getting money orrrr recruiting pokemon?
That kinda stuff. How's that sound?
Sorry for- Attacking you. Even though I totally missed and you wrecked me.

>>7648929
I like exploring. And fighting.
But I suppose I could do those things too...
Wouldn't mind, really.
-Crawdaunt

>>7648974
Yeah we can see. Take some time getting settled in.
Uh, watch out for any weirdos since you're kinda far from the castle.
Do you have a name?
-Stitches

>>7648989
Everyone called me Crawdaunt back home...or lobster. I don't like being called lobster, so...any other nicknames in mind?
-Crawdaunt

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>>7649004
...What about Punchy?

>>7649004
...
Shelly? Dukes? Crabclaws?
Throatripper? Destitchinator?
Bruiser?

-Stitches, bad at names

>>7649011
>>7649021
Hmm...
I mean, those are all cool names and stuff, but..
I don't really mind whatever you call me.
Sort of indecisive when it comes to this sort of thing.
-Crawdaunt

>>7649052
I'm sticking with Punchy.
-Teddy

>>7649052
Kehehe. That's fine.
I'll call you Claws or Punchy.
... Or Destitchinator.

-Stitches

>>7649059
>>7649064
Punchy it is, huh?
...
Well, okay then.
-Crawdaunt

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>>7649073
Shelldon?

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>>7649086
dont

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>>7649097
What?..

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>>7649086
>>7649097
>>7649073
>Tree pets the Crawdault
Shell-
-Don

>>7649119
...
-Crawdaunt

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>>7649119
>Teddy just stands there dumbfounded
...Well. That's it, you're Shelldon now. Tree doesn't just break his speech pattern for anything.

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>>7649127
>Carter gets done telling the excessively large Ultra Beast not to eat his new friends.
Shelldon doesn't sound bad to me.

>>7649146
>>7649148
...
Does it mean anything?
-Shelldon

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>>7649127
>>7649146
>>7649148
>>7649157
>Tree looks at the group confused
I am Tree?
>apparently he hasn't realised he said something other than "I am Tree"

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>>7649157
Hell if I know. Word of tree makes it thus, though.
>Guzzlord gets to sniffing all of it's new friends.
>And growling out hellos.

>>7649185
>Teddy greets the guzzlord

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>>7649119
>Stitches has stopped working.

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>>7649197
>Guzzlord sniffs him and snaps at him a few times with its mouths.
>It's trainer gives it a brief glare before it gives him a bit of a wave with its mouths.

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>>7649200
>tree offers a berry to Stiches
>he is still confused as for the reason for everyones reactions

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>>7649248
>He just stares.

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>>7649305
>Poke the Stitch

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>>7649319
>Stare roll.

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>UPLOADING FUN.GIF

HELLO

I AM LOOKING

FOR FUN

WHERE CAN ICE FIND IT

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>>7649351
...
>Smooch the broken bf

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Yoooo.
How's everyone doing?
>>7649381
If 'chu wanna vacation, Snowpoint in Sinnoh might be, like, cool to visit.

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>>7650350
Well, this is the first time in a long time that I've been this stressed out.
>the ship Sandslash got on last night has finally arrived in Johto
>Sandslash gets off and starts digging towards Violet city

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>somewhere in the ocean that divides Unova and Kalos (don't know if it's name changed sorry)
>The ocean stirs, the ground quakes
>A singular, massive tower rises up
>An enormous bullet
>The bullet's shell has doors, and they have opened
>One word rims the top of the shell
>GUNGEON
(Feel free to ignore this, seek it out, or use it to get all your gunplay RP out without fucking up people's plots)
(Gunguy, this is for you)

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>>7650402
What's got 'chu stressed, bro?

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>>7650478
>Watching the news
>This comes up
>? ? ? ? ?

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>>7650478
>>7650605

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>>7650594
The whole thing with Victini yesterday. I nearly got all my friends hurt, or even killed just because I couldn't keep my stupid mouth shut.

This is the second time I've done this and I'm not letting it happen again, I'm going to hide in a cave and never come out.

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>>7650620
>Loud cheering and gun grabbing.

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>>7650620
... What the fuck
I finally get a break from trying to fix the League and the first thing I see is this.
God DAMNIT world.

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>>7650620
...Well then.
That's certainly something.
Wonder what Stitch'll think of this..
>Bonehead why are you talking to yourself
>Stop that.

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>>7650620
I'm glad I woke up early today
This is cool!
...What's even in there?

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>>7650631
I, like, didn't catch it, sorry. At least everybody's okay, right?
Victini seems to have calmed down, and it's not 'chur fault.
>>7650646
oh, hey, bro. How's the Gym stuff going?

>>7650620
Policefag fucking reporting.
Fuck me sideways, I was hoping to not have to coordinate disaster response and interrupt my fucked-up-leg leave.
I'm getting on the horn with the Kalosians, I would advise against going anywhere near that shit.

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>>7650620
hehehehe...
Neat!

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>>7650683
Yeah, but I don't want to risk doing that shit again.
Just because things worked out the first two times doesn't mean they'll be so lucky next time I fuck up.
I'm just going to avoid contact with others for now, at least that way I can't possibly end up making things worse.
>Sandslash is now hiding in a cave
>he really needs to work on not blaming himself for everything bad that happens

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>>7650683
Gym stuff has been about the same. Coordinating the un-fucking of the Kanto League on the other hand has been a drain on my soul. Finding gym leader replacements for all these fucking shitty people is damn near impossible. We STILL haven't found anyone for Celadon, let alone all the others.

And now this shit.

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>>7650775
I say we just move the gym out of Celadon. Might be easier to find a leader for it.

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>>7650785
The League doesn't have the budget for that, and it doesn't matter where a leader comes from. Hell, I came over from Hoenn, and before that, Unova.

Speaking of Unova, they gonna try and seal that bullet tower thing off?

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>>7650775
Wish I could help, bro. The only dude I, like, know at all in Kanto's got no experience and a crazy life right now, though.
>>7650808
Probably, bro. They might try to get help with that.

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>>7650824
Probably for the best.
Say, you know my other half right? How's he doing?

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>>7650808
No.
Don't you go meddling with a gift from the gods like this.
We wants to explore this doohickey here.

Earl!
Get the hovercraft!

>>7650808
Policefag reporting. Your reputation precedes you, my friend, and I salute your efforts.

As for the ominous sea tower, we're sure as fuck going to try to seal the thing off, with a little aid from the Kalosians. I'd encourage anybody looking to poke at it to reconsider.
>>7650860
That means you. Don't fucking do it.

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>soon after the Gungeon rose, it's siren song began to play, far and wide, a beacon, offering adventure

https://youtu.be/TjDreiY-HwA

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>>7650835
Well, he broke up with Lucy. It was kinda... well... bound to happen eventually.
After that, we, like, kinda sorta joined Plasma and have been on their frigate since.
Zang-Emrys is in a new relationship and, bro, he's in a new relationship. One that, like, isn't a house of cards waiting to fold.

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>>7650875
Sorry officer but your breaking up, couldn't hear that last bit.
Ksshh, kshhh.
Clearly one of those comm-uni-cation problems.
Kshhh!

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>>7650898
Well shit, thanks for the info.
How's Plasma taking this?
>>7650875
Good luck, does anyone even know what's in there yet?

>>7650935
Policefag reporting. We're not entirely sure, but Kalosian forces are reporting hostile inhabitants. They don't seem interested in leaving at least, so that's something in our favor thus far.

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>>7650955
Well, I'll be out there soon, gonna be a long heli ride.

Yes, I'm actually coming out there, not of my own volition though, the League said they need a rep out there and I got picked because I have a confetti gun. So they say. I think they're just trying to get me out of their hair for a while.

Cali's all excited for adventure again, Lune is staying behind because her kid finally wants to evolve and they're making that choice together.

>>7650892
Is anyone else hearing this song or have I lost my fucking mind?

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>>7650478
>>7650892
>Morning news watching
>"Looks more like a really convenient prison than anything else"
Welp, morning everyone.

>>7651039
I am hearing it. It's quite nice.

>>7650955
What do we know about the inhabitants?

>>7650990
Ha, bringing a sword to a gunfight.
Might actually work in this case.

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>>7651130
I hope so, King's Shield has been maxed out with PP ups and I've got a bag full of Ethers, hopefully that's enough, I doubt it though.

Yeah that song, its... I dunno, catchy? I like it, but having it heard world wide is insane. It's getting louder as we get closer too, so it's a beacon, telling everyone with ears where to find this place.

Fucking hell, this is going to be a mess.

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>>7650892
Huh. I wonder where I left my laser pistol and lockpicks.
>>7651176
>A shield.
Cheaaaaaating.

>>7651206
>potentially life threatening situation
>cheating
pick one.

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>>7651206
...Do you know something about this thing? It looks like no one else does, the news just hit that there are things in there that attack you on sight!

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>>7651210
Both.
>>7651221
They've got a fancy shmancy gun that kills your past.
Might even be enough to wipe some big mistakes off the face of the Earth.

>>7651243
...That makes no fucking sense, you're making shit up. How the fuck would you know anything about this?

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>>7651257
You ever heard of videogames?

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>>7651176
It's not like the world has gone absolutely nanab ever since the year started.
By the way don't expect much help from Unova ever since they got their government decapitated yesterday.

>>7651268
>Videogames
>Doggo paws
ok.

>>7651268
explain the laser pistol

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>>7651243
>They've got a fancy shmancy gun that kills your past.
>Sandslash stops sulking to himself in the cave he's in
...Really?

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>>7651268
What does that have to do with the price of butter?
>>7651270
I'm sorry WHAT!?
HOW MUCH HAS HAPPENED SINCE I STARTED TRYING TO CLEAN UP THE FUCKING LEAGUE!?

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>>7651287
You ever heard of trainers?
>>7651301
Joooke. I was referencing one of the characters.
If I was gonna go in I'd use a revolver or a shotgun.
>>7651302
Yep.
If whichever god is doing this is following the game you don't really run a risk of dying.
More like getting kicked out and having to try again.
>>7651305
Whatever you're quoting it's lost on me. I don't watch a lot of TV.

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>>7651287
There are customized arcade stick for the gamin 'mon. I had even bought two for zang Emry's LP attempts.

>>7651305
Victini had a mid life crisis of sorts, just realized the cold war was long over and decided to pay Unova a favour... by killing the recently elected president and his cabinet because he was disliked. So much for the protector of democracy.
Apparently they got it contained with a heavy dose of brainwashing.

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>>7651319
...Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss, Anyways, I mean, what do video games have to do with any of this?

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>>7651335
Booooooks, oh, gotcha. Sorry, still lost on me.
This whole event thingy is taking pretty heavily from a game. By heavily I mean like 1:1.

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>>7651346
That's an extremely convenient explanation, isn't it?

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>>7651319
Right.
Well that settles it then, I have to try.

>>7651335
Hey buddy, you're planning on going there too right?
Any chance you could come pick me up from Violet city?

So the discord is more autistic then I thought.

I for a while have been watching them and the shit I've seen what the fuck.
I thought them waifufagging them selfs was bad but last night took the fucking cake.
One of them wants to make a fallout and pokemon crossover bullshit nobody here wants that buckko ok? So just kys laddy no one here wants that

>>7651363
(you)
take it and leave, faggot.

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>>7651359
...
You have Steam don't you? Am I the only one that plays videogames?
>>7651361
Take care.

>>7651363
(Actually that makes me want to go there and experience the unfiltered autism slightly more)
(Now leave)

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>>7651363
<squelch indicating fug (you)>

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>>7650892
...
>Stitches gets to making a crossbow.

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>>7651388
Next you will tell me there's an underground community of 'mons lead by an oversized Gogoat just because I played Undertale.

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>>7651426
Boy do I have some news for you.

Nice to see Turts pressuring people into accepting his side yet again.

>>7651439
(if this is going to lead to "lol all video games come to life" I'll retcon the Gungeon, I wanted to keep it contained to an isolated incident)

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>>7651413
>Boop the Stitch
Helloooo.
I see you already found out about the Gungeon thing.

>>7651455
(I'll cut it out. The Undertale thing was a joke. It was more of a poke at Farsail and Failsail than a real Undertale reference.)

>>7651465
(phew, just had to make sure)

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>>7651456
Hey. Are you gonna try it?
>He sharpens a few bolts.

Croags is the worst of all of them because I want to hug them but I cant

Lol

This is fucking hilarious he's actually reconsidering it he might actually drop it

Best part is the discord unironaclly agree with me on points because they know it's true they just don't want to admit it cause
>Muh friendship

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>>7651482
I..I don't know.
If the reward is just fixing something in your past like that glaceon mentioned, probably not. Because that could change a lot of things.

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>>7651361
Sorry man, I'm already way out in the ocean and this helicopter can't turn around

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>Sandslash has "borrowed" a boat from Goldenrod city
>he's now heading towards the Gungeon, guided by it's song
>roll to see what his weapon is
>dubsevens = a speargun he found on the boat
>evens = rusty old pistol found on the boat
>odds = still has those claw gauntlet things Bones gave him a while ago
>dubsodds = weapons are for people without sharp claws

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>>7651543
Mm...
Maybe you're right.

>>7651552
>>7651557
(that's some unfortunate timing, right as Sandslash gets fed up of waiting)

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>>7651565
>[Audible Shrug™]
I mean, I could understand if you wanted to, but the worst/best thing that happened to me was dying, so I don't really see the need for it.

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>>7651605
>Drop the crossbow crap.
Yeah, you're right.
>Hug the boyfriendo.

>>7651325
Policefag reporting, what the f u c k .
Looks like I have to clean up even more clusterfuckery. Joy.
Fuck my scotch drinking, I'm going to need to switch to the cheap shit to get sloshed enough for this.
>>7651456
D O N O T .
Kalosian authorities are setting up a perimeter. That means 'stay the fuck out because they ain't fucking around'.
>>7651552
Please tell me you're just there to maintain the perimeter...

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>>7651630
>Hug the Stitch back
..The crossbow might be cool though.

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So, any more info on what we're dealing with in there?
>>7651439
Ahahahah god I hope not
>>7651646
UNFORTUNATELY the League wants me to scope the place out.
Some of them want to use it as a training grounds. I really, really wish they had at least one brain in their collective skulls, but they don't, and as much as I'm trying to correct that, I still have my orders.

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>>7651646
>A perimeter.
Oops. Looks like they've set that perimeter up around Anistar City.
They really do make silly mistakes.

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>>7651659
And before you ask, yes, the League is doing this legally, they already spoke with the Kalosians about it, I go in, do some investigations, come out and we see what happens nex-
>>7651669
...okay so the plan is still unchanged but I'm pretty much on my own in this.

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>>7651646
Shit..
>attempt to hide as the boat passes by various patrol boats
>evens = why is that boat empty?
>odds = a pile of sand is not the best hiding place while on a boat in the middle of the ocean

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>>7651439
>attempted poker face

>>7651646
You could also try to keep everything working as usual and buy into Victini's excuse that they were all foreigner spies. Which is clearly bullshit but hey, everyone in his direct vicinity believed it which is why I'm not seeing news of Unova being in literal flames again.

>>7651659
Now it's pretty damn clear that they wanted to get rid of you.

>>7651659
My Kalosian counterpart is trying to contact League authorities, although I think they're playing dumb and giving him the run-around.
The regional epithets for people's mothers aren't helping matters.
If anyone has a chance at surviving that fucking deathtrap, it's probably you. Good luck.
>>7651669
. . .
Okay, this one I'm blaming on your brother Palkia.

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>>7651654
I mean maybe if we fight a vampire or something.
>Smooch that bonesnoot and get back to work.
What have you been up to?

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>>7651680
Oh yeah, but if I survived the mountains of paperwork and endless flood of potential gym leaders I can survive this and come back with even more clout to fix shit.

>>7651684
Thanks mate, I touch down in an hour.

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>>7651679
Anistar Ciiiiiiity.
>>7651678
>>7651684
Have fun. Don't expect it to last long. I'll turn it back into quarks once the day is done.

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>>7651684
>on your brother palkia
bro
what the fuck
ive been sleeping
why :^(

>>7651680
Policefag reporting.
They were executives. President, staff chiefs, et cetera.
AKA "the exact people who would have had to be in charge of instituting a covert program on a Regional level via subversion of police and medical assets." And they didn't cut and run like the legislators did when shit got real around here.
Get the picture yet?
It still means wagging my finger at Victini, but Victini looks a lot better in an 'overcome with righteous indignation' scenario than 'had a psychotic break'.

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>>7651706
no you won't kiddo, I may be one of the worst of us but I am still stronger than you.

It stays until someone acquires The Gun.

(there, now people can have their fun with it and it cleans itself up after the fact)

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>>7651743
Your problem to clean up then. I knew you were a fan of senseless violence.

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>>7651753
Well it's not like anyone's actually going to DIE in there. I'm not a complete monster like your mother was.

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>>7651689
The way things are going, that's just a matter of time. heh
>Snoot: Get smoochified
Uhm, not much really. decided to sleep for a bit instead of working through the night again.

>>7651753
I take a catnap an' suddenly there's a buncha weird shit goin' on
Ain't even gonna try an' make sense of it
Mornin' babe

>>7651764
(OH GOD WRONG AVATAR FUCK THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE SKITTY)

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>>7651757
>>7651764
I think its time to invest in some of that coffee Colress talks about.

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>>7651714
I believe he mistakenly thought you redirected the blockade because it would be funny. Admittedly in a cosmic sense it would be.

>>7651706
>>7651743
>>7651764
I have no idea what's going on, so I'm going to take a nap and hope there's a solid agreement on what reality is at least when I wake up.
( gaaah, i wish i could post more but RL has fucked me a little )

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>>7651706
(hold up I'm confused, the I thought the guy said the Gungeon was in the middle of the ocean? what does Anistar have to do with it?)

>Sandslash has ended up near Anistar city
...This doesn't seem like a great place to be.

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>>7651736
It does, both for Victini and for trying to not get too many people killed.
Also because the best solution just isn't going to happen even with Gigi right here.

>>7651764
>>7651771
"A buncha weird shit goin' on" is just a normal morning nowadays.

>>7651788
(the blockade got moved by Giratina or Palkia over to Anistar, ocean is clear)

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>>7651759
Vampires are cool though.
Sleeping?
Nerrrrrrrrd. Nerrrrrrrdddddd.
>Test fire the crossbow into the sand.
>Evens/Odds are success and failure.

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>>7651774
I blame that on you bro. Sorry babe, I swear I ain't got any pics of your dad on my phone.
>>7651789
Last time I randomly take a catnap
>>7651796
(This shit is so fucking confusing - this is why I don't sleep. People end up doing weird shit. I might just like... Retcon the entire thing, depending on what the Discord thinks.)

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>>7651798
..I wouldn't know, I don't really do vampire-y stuff.
A-and I was tired okay? I worked all through the night before on that breastplate for Ted, and some other stuff, too.
..Also that's pretty cool.

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>>7651821
I vant to suck your blooooood.
>Nibble his neck.
What kinda nerd am I dating here? Freakin' sleeping?
I know! Isn't it?

>>7651789
I'm pulling the trigger on this plan, then. The evidence from seized documents strongly indicates this conclusion, but we were still putting together the mountains of paperwork necessary to address the issue formally.

>>7651757
So, the weird ocean tower's still there, the Kalosian blockade got divine redirection to someplace else, and I'm hoping it disappears soon before anybody gets wrecked there.

>>7651820
(Indifferent here as long as it's not an extended event)

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Seriously, any info on what's in there would help a LOT. I'd like to not fucking die in 2 seconds because I wasn't ready for what's in that tower thing.
>>7651820
(I'm using this as a chance to dev Human!Emrys and apparently the sandslash is too)

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>>7651821
>>7651842

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>>7651796
(alright, thanks for clarifying. must've missed that post)
>Sandslash leaves the stolen boat out of sight along with the pistol
>he heads into the city to take a break in the cafe for now

>>7651820
(not in the discord but I'm fine either way, I can improv my way out of this shit if need be)

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BREAKING NEWS

The new President of Unova, former Secretary of Agriculture Eric Saltpeter, has declared war on the region of Almia following the local Legendary Pokemon Victini's surprising and unforseen rampage, slaughtering the recently-elected former President and his cabinet. The government and much of the populace is placing blame on this event in a surprising direction- the President and his cabinet being Almian spies.

More at 5.

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>>7651842
...lewd.
>The Bones does a squirmy thing
I-I just need to sleep sometimes, that's all. I don't get to stay up forever like yooou..

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>>7651848
If that definitely calms down the former president voterbase then go for it. And then you can enjoy the Victini Day.

>>7651868
Hostile inhabitants and that's pretty much it?

>>7651820
(Indifferent as long it doesn't outstay it's welcome, as well)

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>>7651905
... what is even going on anymore.
>>7651877
>>7651868
>>7651848
>>7651935
(I guess I'll leave it then? Man I like... just woke up and have fucked up twice already, I think I might just go back to sleep.)
(At least I haven't like... Used a Dave pic when N is trying to seduce Gladion. I think I'd have to kms if that happened.)

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>>7651905
W H A T

>>7651905
you've gotta be kidding me.
Policefag here, I'm getting on the phone with Saltpeter right the fuck now. We don't have the assets to go to war with anybody right now, even if it is Almia.
I'll be out of contact for a while, let me see what I can work out.
>audible swig of whiskey

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>>7651935
...did any Kalosians survive, and did they take pictures? The more info the better, man.
>>7651905
OKAY WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUCK

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>>7651905

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>>7651905
fuk em

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>>7651905
<splortch indicating that this cannot be good>

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>>7651905
This is the exact opposite of what I wanted.

>>7651943
>>7651952
There's always more and it's always worse.

>>7651963
Nothing further than a few rooms in from what I'm getting. No one has set up any visuals, the inhabitants keep stealing the cameras and trying to shoot eachother with those. Weird, gun fetishizing inhabitants.

Strangely enough, no confirmed losses.

(Can we please stop with the crossovers? How long until we get NT?)

>>7652011
(NT already happened and was over very quickly)

>>7652011
(Nevermind I guess.>>7651995 The constant crossovers are making me lose interest though.)

>>7652023
(I legit didn't think anyone would pay attention to it, or it would get Arceus'd out of existance in five seconds, but then a bunch of people started heading for it and I was just like "welp okay guess this is happening"
It does explain Gunguy nicely though, he was just the warning that this was coming)

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>>7651952
>>7651963
I can potentially see about swaying Unova out of war as well.
>>7652011
>>7652019
>>7652023
(Most of these things have been happening while I was asleep. It's been getting kinda irritating and makes me want to sleep less than the four hours a day I normally do. Hold on, I'll Arceus the melting thingy in a sec.)

>>7652046
(Yeah I guess. I'm kind of not interested in these threads anymore. Sorry if some of the more important characters disappear. I'm outie.)
>>7652048
(See ya.)

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>>7652048
(Oh, sorry. I'll just go.)

>>7652052
(oh god who were you)

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>>7651995
What the fuck... No. Just... No.
>Get turned into a Muk
>>7652052
(Sorry to hear that you're leaving. Can you tell me who you play so I can remove your characters from the Pastebin list?)
>>7652058
(It's fine, I'm just changing the character into a Muk)

>>7652046
>>7652052
(fuck. I feel kinda bad now, didn't intend to ruin people's interest by taking part in the Gungeon thing)
(apologies to the anon that's leaving)

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Alright, touching down now. Anyone else here?

(Fuck now I feel like shit too. Ah well, price of trying to characterdev I guess)
(Sorry to the guy that scram'd)

>>7652052
(Welp, goodbye then)

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>>7652142
I uh...I'll be there soon, I needed a break from being so close to so much water for a while.
>roll to see how good Sandslash is at navigating the ocean on a stolen boat
>odds = gonna take like 10 more minutes at least
>evens = you'll see him show up in less than 5 minutes

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>>7652142
Guess not, here goes something!
>Roll to complete gungeon in one post so this crossover plot can fug off and we go back to mostly normal

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>>7652187
>failure guess we're doing this the long way
What in the fuck.
I'm having to type this while ducked behind a table
It's bullets
I'm being shot at BY bullets, WITH bullets, big, living bullets carrying fucking guns.
One of them is glowing red and looks very fucking angry, I'm mostly relying on Cali to keep us alive right now.

Shit this table is gonna break in another shot or two gotta go

>Roll to not die

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>>7652187
(nice timing, again)
>roll to see if Sandslash can get his shit together and find this place quicker
>odds = nah fuck this I'm going back to Orre
>evens = Sandslash has arrived, ready to help get this wrapped up as quickly as possible

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>>7652212
This is just whack. Whack and bullshit.
Skedaddle and let that place sink back into the ocean.

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>>7652212
OKAY, I CLEARED OUT MOST OF THE FIRST FLOOR
Holy FUCK I am glad I brought Cali with.
...one of the rednecks managed to get here first and set up a literal shop, I bought a gun with empty bullet shells. It's just a sawed-off, but if Cali runs out of PP for Flash Cannon I'll have to switch to it because getting close to these guys is NOT a good idea.

There's a big, scary looking door ahead, wish me luck!

>>7652241
I can't man, the elevator left me behind. It only goes down, so I guess it'll go up once I hit bottom.

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>>7652265
(fug)
>Roll to not die/kill the boss

>>7652064
>>7652067
(Yeah I'll make a list. I'm going to stay off for a while and think this over.)

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>>7652265
For once am I glad of these damn rednecks.
...I think I hear squawking noises.

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>>7652304
>Muffled squawking in the distance

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>>7652274
...I just fought a fucking bird with a machine gun and won.

I am so glad there's tables -and Cali's Shield- to hide behind. I still haven't gotten killed.

There's a golden shotgun shell and a new gun lying on pedestals. Just touching that shell makes me feel fucking GOOD. Like, alive good, not sexually good or I'd think Palkia had a hand in this, the lewd bastard.

Next room has the elevator again. Going down!

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>>7652327
...Alright this place is like, 20 different kinds of fucked, I'm hiding behind like, five tables I shoved together because THERE'S A FUCKING IRON MAIDEN SHOOTING AT ME AND OH GOD THE BULLETS ARE EVERYWHERE
I keep trying to shoot at it when it stops but that ain't working, either this new gun is shit or this thing is really, really strong. Gonna take a risk and shoot it while it's open.

>Roll to not fukkin die like a little bitch

Policefag here, typing while on phone. Talks with Saltpeter are going... interestingly. I'm sending him documents, and the desk jockeys are franctically trying to cram everything into easily digestible bullet points to advance my argument here.

I get the feeling this is going to go either very well or very poorly at the end of the call.

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>>7652367
OW OW OW FUCK THAT HURT
Room is clear, I got shot though
Fuuuuck
There's been a few red jello bullets that appeared when I cleared the room, they're heart shaped and I'm already fucked either way so...
>Nom

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>>7652393
...yay the bleeding stopped and I don't feel like falling over and dying, but fuck, that's a hole in my chest.

Speaking of chest, there's a big, fancy red one in front of me. Gonna open it.

>roll for mimic

>>7652304
Policefag here, so fucking much for containment.

He, do you think you could do me a favor? I'm trying to persuade people that the fucking Almians aren't the fuckers who subverted us, and I could use all the help I can get. El Presidente is about as receptive as a stump to my arguments thus far.

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>>7652407
GAH I KNEW IT I KNEW IT WAS GOING TO FUCKING SHOOT AT ME

GOD FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT

I shot it to pieces, and it dropped a gun.

...Dark Marker? That's what the label on the side is. Looks cool as shit.

Anyways, time to clear out the rest of this place and see if I can find a way out or a way down.

>rollerino for not getting wounded/dying

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>>7652440
In your worst case scenario I could attempt to be of use.

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>>7652460
several Ethers and lucky ammo boxes later Cali and I have cleared the second floor. I also did a dumb and bought some fucking piece of a bullet from another redneck shop owner. No idea why, just seemed like a good idea.

Next scary fucking door, HO!

>Dice gods protect me from death by beholster

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>>7652440
Sorry to hear that, buddy.

>>7652471
Sir, do you think we've got a shot at persuading the Unovans not to go through with this insane garbage?

More importantly, do we have a contingency plan if Saltpeter can't be reasoned with?

>>7652460
Good luck with that bullshit. Please, please don't be in the building when it fucks off to wherever it's actually supposed to be.

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>>7652490
...
I managed to snag a pic of this thing right before it started shooting.

I am
BEYOND done with this place, and I want out.

But the elevator only goes one fucking way, so onward and downward. This new gun better not be a piece of shit. Funny, it shares a name with one of the guys on here, Gunther.

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>>7652440
Let's watch again the tapes of Victini "convincing" everyone that they were foreign spies, I don't think he mentioned the Almians at all.

>>7652393
>>7652407
>>7652460
>>7652490
At this point I wouldn't be surprised if that is where most of the world's guns ended at after they got severely restricted. This is some serious wunderwaffe shit you got there.
Godspeed.

>>7652496
>Please, please don't be in the building when it fucks off to wherever it's actually supposed to be
...how in the hell do we stop Giratina

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>>7652511
BEYOND
FUCKING
DONE

THIS GUNTHER GUN TALKS AND IT'S A LITTLE BITCH

THIS MINE IS FULL OF EXPLOSIVES AND THINGS THAT SOMEHOW TURN BULLETPROOF BY DIGGING INTO THE GROUND

I AM RIDING AROUND IN A MINECART TRYING NOT TO GET FUCKING SHOT

CALI IS OUT OF FLASH CANNON AND ALMOST OUT OF KING'S SHIELD

FUUUUUUUUU

>roll for wounds/death

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>>7652496
I would presume so - however, my assumption was that in a worst case scenario I would have to resort to force to get them to drop this.

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>>7652529
I DON'T KNOW HOW BUT I FELL INTO A BOTTOMLESS PIT WHILE JUMPING BETWEEN MINECARTS
AND YET I'M STILL ALIVE, I ONLY FEEL LIKE A PIECE OF DEAD MEAT

OW

THAT GUNPOWDER BETTER BE FUCKING WORTH IT

fuuck
haven't seen a jello heart in a while.

shelled out (heh) and bought one from the latest redneck

How the fuck they got so far down without dying is beyond me. Redneck magic, I guess.

Next door, ho. Hopefully it's weak to this fucking water pistol I picked up.

>roll to not get wounded/die to tonk

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>>7652563
OW

OW OW
FUCK

JELLO HEARTS DO NOT STOP PAIN, ONLY ACTUAL DAMAGE

OW
I GOT MY ARM CRUSHED UNDER THIS FUCKING BULLET-DRIVEN TANK

OW

FUCK