ITT: Pokemon are real. Shit's going down in Castelia.

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>>7433081
food is everywhere...

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>>7432734
I'm sorry but I can't take part of this. I hope you'll understand.

>>7433081
Personally, I'm more worried about other people.
>>7433072
> Policefag is covered in ranch fries.
> He doesn't even blink.
Well, at least it's not crap or drunk vomit.
Let's move out and report to base, team.

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>>7433081
chilling in aloha
waiting for red and ruby
nothing really important going on here

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>>7433081
Just peachy.

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>>7432971
>>7433003
>>7433053
>>7433060
>>7433076
>>7433103
>FOCUS PUNCH

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>>7433081
More than fine!

>>7433051
huh?

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>>7433081
Being far away, safely watching through cameras, cameras and more cam...
>one camera detects a bunch of team rocket grunts breaking and entering into an office building
>an office building that hosts servers for many sites
>including a certain stream site
Ah hell.

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>>7433081
Decently.
>>7433119
Wow you really can't hit crap.
Let's see how much you bleed.
>Swing!

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>>7433119
>Ram bat into one of the many eye things

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>Mcghetsis flies over the Battle in castelia city
Go Go Ghetsis, instant burritos
>evens burritos rapidly fall out off ghetsis's ass and onto the people below
>odds: its literally shit, and its spraying everywhere

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>>7433111
....

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>>7433081
I'm in bed.
I'll be honest, I spend most of my free time sitting here.
The master bedroom on the frigate is the comfiest.
>>7433099
I understand.
That is your decision.

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>>7433139
>>7433149
>COME ON BASHING BASED HEROS
>END ME
>EARTHQUAKE

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It's time for more long distance battling over TCP/IP
>Hal goes to cyberspace with destination Castelia

>>7433155
Ha ha, constipation

>>7433155
>Policefag's team is more aware than he is.
. . .
I just had to jinx it, didn't I?
'At least it's not crap', I said.
All units, reclaim this fucking city.

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>>7433171
>If you insist!
>SMAAAash!! the giant braille beeping bastard in an eye

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>>7433171
...Hey bat boy you hold the-
>>7433200
Holy shit.
Yeah you hold that thing I'm going for the trainer!
>Runs off behind the regi.
>Swings at the trainer!

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>>7433200
>The bat splinters.
>Regigias is stunned.
>>7433212
>The trainer is knocked out.

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>>7433129
shh
pretend you never read that
youre too young to read my ramblings
shits rated r dude
>>7433156
need a ride dude
i can use time shenanigans to come pick you up or some shit
kinda thought youd prefer to fly on your dragon or something

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>>7433227
>lands next to you on Charizard.

Sorry we got hungry on the way...

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>>7433224
>Retrieve pokeball.
>Smash that thing!

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>Hal has arrived at the Castelia servers
>Team Rocket has yet to reach this floor.

>>7433200
>Earthbound_SMAAAASH.wav

>>7433199
You might want to know about a bunch of Team Rocket goons that if not dealt with, they will either cause havoc on Castelia hosted sites and/or get varying amounts of paralyzed and frozen, and I'm not going to hold responsible for the latter.
>directions to broken in building

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>>7433224
>Get bat#3, the metal one
>FINISH IT

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>>7433163
I don't want to run into someone I know or who knows me. If it was just my life in danger, that's one thing. But faith n' Joy and the lil fawning, they're family. I can't risk them too.

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>>7433248
>Regigias is no longer under Team Rocket's orders.
>>7433272
>It puts up an arm to block.
>Beep beep beep beep?

>>7433263
Tac squad's en route, I'm going to call shots from the command tent.
Thanks.
>Policefag sighs.
I need a shower.

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>>7433246
Do my sensors detect hungry people
>go Go ghetsis, Hot dog surprise
>Evens: hot dogs fly at Red and His Team
>Odds: the dogs are missing and there is too much mustard

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>>7433272
Joe! It's good I smashed the ball I think it's fine. Not against us anymore.
>>7433303
Uh, do you understand what it's saying?

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>>7433311
....? ...!

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>>7433303
Wait what
>Too small, and too slow block me
>Accidentally the gigas eye

>>7433329
..Oh, whoops.

And no I don't speak braille.

>>7433311
(I have to admit, I'm amused at the concept of a fast food-based villain)

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>>7433303
>UNIT ONE: BEEP AS WELL
.-. . --. .. --. .- ... / -....- / -.. --- / -.-- --- ..- / .-. . --.- ..- .. .-. . / .- ... ... .. ... - .- -. -.-. . / .. -. / .-. . - ..- .-. -. .. -. --. / - --- / ... .. -. -. --- ....

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>Hal camping out the only corridor leading to the server farm
>5 Team Rocket goons detected at the other side
>Hal used Thunder Wave

>>7433306
Beats me what do they want with this place, unless one of these servers contains something they really want.

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>>7433371
>It pokes at a few of the cracks in its eyes.
>Pet the strong warrior gently.
>>7433329
>Pet the other warrior.
>>7433382
>Affirmative beeping.

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>>7433354
Don't fear, I will sate your appetite
Go Go Ghetsis, Doritos and Dip
>Evens Doritos and salsa dip pop out of Ghetsis's chest and he hands it to Red
>Odds: it Sprays at Red along with a fountain of mountain Dew

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>>7433246
yeah dude
i get it
munchies happen
>>7433354
holy shit
>>7433311
>Mega Blaziken - High Jump Kick

>>7433391
>Tac squad on site, sir. Lycanrocs in front, Noctowls on the back line.

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>>7433311
This isn't ketchup.

>Thunder

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>>7433371
Welp.
>>7433382
>>7433420
I guess... That worked out?

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>>7433420
-.. --- / -. --- - / .-- --- .-. .-. -.-- / -....- / .--. .-.. .- ... -- .- / .-- .. .-.. .-.. / .- ... ... .. ... -
>UNIT ONE: SEND COORDINATES: RECIPIENT: COLRESS

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>>7433420
Oof, uh..
>Pat back?
>Get off the giant pokey

>>7433448
I guess it did?

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>No Hal, not Discharge time yet, we're trying to do this non-lethally
>Hal used Thunder Wave on the closing in goons

>>7433436
Server farm is in Basement 2, not much room for strategy but sandwiching these goons in.

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>>7433472
>Bwip.
Oh a pickup?
>...
FOR REGIGIAS?
>Smash that mf fly button toward Castelia.

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>>7433509
If we don't get camera footage of you doing a happy nerd dance at that news I'm going to be very disappointed

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>>7433472
>HAPPY BEEPING
>>7433448
>>7433480
>Poke warriors

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>>7433443
!?

>>7433504
> Affirmative, Command. Tac squad out.
> Tac Squad's Noctowl used Hypnosis!

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>>7433426
You burnt my buns
Have a Go Go Ghetsis, curling Iron Barrage
>evens curling iron missiles get launched at Dave
>odds Its frozen Hot dogs instead
>>7433443
Go Go Ghetsis Ketchup founain
>evens ketchup sprays all over pikachu out of ghetsis's nipples
>odds: its mustard

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>>7433480
Well today has been one hell of a day.
>>7433540
>Flinches.
No touchy please. I get it you respect me or want to snap me in half.

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>>7433540
. . .

>Poke the pokey pokemon

>>7433567
Yeah, you can say that again.

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>>7433563
>gets smacked by hot dogs
dude
i like weiner
but not like this
>Mega Blaziken High Jump Kick

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>>7433563
>VOLT TACKLE

GRRRR

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>>7433538
Quiet.
>>7433540
Amazing. I'll be there shortly to pick you up.

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>>7433603
....

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>>7433567
>>7433595
>Ancient golem does not understand boundaries.
>Pets for strong warriors.
>Beeps of good wishes.
>Beeps of good luck.

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>>7433562
Two down, three to go
>Hal retreats further down the corridor, uses Thunder Wave
>and gets tackled on by a Rocket goon
>one other goon tries to open a pokeball in the tight corridor, gets a faceful of ratatta

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>>7433595
It's not as murdery as I thought. Kinda sweet.
Is this what you expected Unova to be like?
>>7433634
>Pet the finger.
Sorry buddy I can't understand you.

>>7433652
>Noctowl used Hypnosis!
> Lycanroc used Bite!

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>>7433611
-.-. --- .-.. .-. . ... ... / -.-. --- .-.. .-. . ... ... / -.. .. -.. / .. / -.. --- / --. --- --- -.. / -.-. --- .-.. .-. . ... ... ..--..
>>7433634
>UNIT ONE: HAS OBSERVED REGI BEHAVIOR: ACTION: POKE THE REGI

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>>7433600
>McGhetsis lies still no longer functioning
>a voice plays from somewhere on it
"damn you Dave How Dare you break My Mcghetsis prototype, how am I supposed to Dominate the Fast Food market now"

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>>7433634
..Yeah I ain't got a clue what you're saying but we're cool.
>Give the big lug a thumbs up

>>7433659
Yeah he's pretty cool actually.

And no, not at all, not even a second of it.
Not that that's a bad thing.

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>>7433699
>THUNDER THUNDER THUNDER THUNDER

WHERE'S MY FUCKING KETCHUP BITCH?

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>>7433683
You did fantastic Unit One.
Lowering cargo box. Can you help Regigigas inside?

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>>7433600
Like hot dogs?

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>>7433659
>>7433704
>Beep at warriors more.
>...
>Mimic thumbs up.
>>7433683
>Poke metal bug.
>>7433743
>METAL BOX
>MUST TOUCH.
>poke poke touch

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Hal, you have my permission to get this cunt out of your face through stronger methods
>Hal used Ice Beam point blank on the goon's face (miss on odd under 5)

>>7433669
>the Ratatta dislodges from it's trainer's face at the attempted biting and assumes a combat stance
>One rocket goon and his ratatta left

>>7433669

>>7433730
>as a final action the McGhetsis prototype self destructs
>Evens: Ketchup, fries and well done steaks go everywhere
>odds, its Ranch instead of Ketchup

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>>7433699
idk dude
fucking haunt your rivals or some weird shit like that
>>7433767
shhhh
youre too pure for that conversation
itll corrupt you
>>7433730
dude lets just
go to the hot dog stand
theres fucking fifty of these shits on the beach

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>>7433704
Hahaha. I can say I never thought I'd see this dude in person.
Freakin' cool. Yeah, weird shit happens here daily.
>>7433773
>Give the Regi a thumbs up back.

>>7433778
> Tac Team's Lycanroc used Tackle!

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>>7433804
Yes!

>>7433812
ok that sounds really good!

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>>7433743
.- ..-. ..-. .. .-. -- .- - .. ...- .
>>7433773
.-- . .----. .-. . / .... . .- -.. . -.. / -... .- -.-. -.- / - --- / ... .. -. -. --- .... / -....- / - .... .. ... / .. ... / - .... . / - .-. .- ...- . .-.. / -.-. .-. .- - . .-.-.- / -.. --- / -.-- --- ..- / .-- .. ... .... / ..-. --- .-. / -.-. --- -- .--. .- -. -.-- ..--..
>UNIT ONE: POKE THE GIGAS

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>>7433814
And I can say not even in my wildest dreams would I have launched myself at it to take it down, heheh.

>Collect bat #1 from the street

So uh, you said you worked at a bar right?

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>>7433699
Possess one of those Ronald McDonald statues and work from there.

>>7433818
>Ratatta down
>Fourth Team Rocket goon lying out cold in the floor, but alive. Might need medical attention or risk frostbite in the face.
>Last team Rocket goon paralyzed by fear

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>>7433814
>Communication success!
>>7433856
>Go inside box.
..-. .-. .. . -. -..
-.-. --- -- .
.-- .. - ....
-- .
>New home
>Comfy
>Sleep

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>>7433835
to the hot dog carts
>and Dave proceeds to just buy the entire hot dog cart stock
fucking dig in dudes
>His Pokémon with eating capabilities certainly do
>The ones without try

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>>7434000
!!!!!

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>>7433935
Hell you did amazing. Remind me to let you be the frontliner.
Yeah I do. You wanna go get piss drunk?

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>>7433967
>REQUEST UNDERSTOOD
>UNIT ONE: ENTER CRATE WITH REGIGIGAS
>ACTION: GUARD

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>>7434021
Thanks eheh, and sure thing.

I don't know about getting smashed but I could certainly use something, that self check earliers finally registering. hahah

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>>7433935
>>7434021
>THROW BAG AT

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>>7433967
>>7434083
>Crate goes up into the frigate.
>Lots of science about to happen.

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>>7434000
>flys in on primal fug

Whoa nice! you have hella money huh?

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>>7434087
Yeah let's go nerd. I need some alcohol after that.
>Lead bat boy to b-
>>7434091
>Bag falls in front of them.
Right...
>Continue leading bat boy to bar.

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>>7434020
what
do you like weiner red
>>7434129
fuck yeah
hot dog stand is fucking nothing for this card
and mom wont even notice
>>7434091
gross
get out of here lillie

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>>7434131
NOT EPIC
>Retrieve bag.
>Run

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>>7434091
..The fuck?

>>7434131
Alright, take me away from these crazies.

>Follow

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>Hal jumps back into cyberspace, towards home, leaving Castelia police to deal with the Team Rocket vandals
Barely got the guy this week and he has already two confirmed successful missions.

>>7434149
>trips in front of a streaming camera
>stream chat laughs

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Which fucking version of the "Forget-me-stick" should this Moon whore get?
I don't do yandere bitches and she's ruining my Alola plans.

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>>7434149
Yeah ok.
>>7434162
Anyway.
>Lead bat dude into empty ass bar.
Take a seat, you want anything specific?
>She goes through the drinks in the cabinet.

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>>7434148
.......?

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>>7434148
I love these wieners!!!

>munch munch munch

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>>7434220
>Throw plush version of nebby at camera
>Run
>>7434253
Use more gun

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>>7434254
So, why the pipe? You work it on pluming or something?

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>>7434256
man dude
kinda wish you knew sign language
that's alright though
i can ramble for the both of us
no biggy
>>7434271
pfffffffffft
yeah you uh
have fun with those
>Dave is trying very hard not to laugh
>Evens he succeeds
>Odds he loses his cool and ends up laughing really hard

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>>7434254
>Sits on a stool
Uh,
Something fruity?
I don't really do bars so it's generally just rum and Ch.pepsi for me.

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>>7434301
Hey there little guy. You ever been in a bag?

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>>7434272
Who the fuck are you?
Gladion's little sister?

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>>7434320
Wish I could help you there.... Red is weird like that. Even I don't know. He likes being alone a lot I don't know why.

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>>7434272
>it's still just a plush
>stream chat laughs harder

>>7434340
Absolutely no one is getting in a bag tonight.

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>>7434301
Something like that. More or less.
I try to help people.
>>7434321
>She mixes him up a Rum Relaxer.
These are pretty decent. First sip tastes a little shitty but it gets better after that.

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>>7434352
Eat my ass.
>>7434390
Everyone's getting in the bag.
>Shoves the Chespin in and runs.

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>>7434390
>Teleports a plastic shopping bag in your general vicinity
>Evens: It's on your head
>Odds: It fell on magnemite

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>>7434340
Lillie, How would you like a spot as vice manager at my fast food restaurant chain,
I require assistance thinking up Ideas among things like a Mountain dew and Doritos sundae, or miniature well done steaks with Ketchup.
You can be in charge of the Stationary restaurants, leave me in charge of the of the mobile division.
I have almost finished the final touches on McGhetsis v2.0

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>>7434416
Not the weirdest request one of his fan girls has ever given me.
Seriously though, who the fuck are you?

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>>7434416
>Throws a jug of ketchup at you
>It explodes on impact

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>>7434320
What are you dorks talking ab out?

>munch munch

got any more mustard over there?

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>>7434446
Hold on I need to see what's in my mystery bag.
>Lillie reaches in... and throws...
>Evens it's a grenade odds its a bottle of ranch.
>>7434452
I'm his sister!
>>7434457
>Catches it in the bag!

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>>7434457
>catches

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>>7434416
Yeah no. You are not going to do this shit.
>Hal pops out of camera
>Hal used Thunder Wave

>>7434430
fuckety fuck fuck

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>>7434513
>Miss!
>Lillie swings her bag like that bat guy and pipe girl!

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>>7434403
Eh, can't be too bad.

>Takes a small swig

..Yeah, not too harsh, thanks.

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>>7434527
>And misses!
>Flee!

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>>7434368
cant blame him man
spent most of my life hiding from people
aka mom and silver
guess i can try to learn to read body language like a mother fucker
or something
bro code man
bros dont let bros rot alone
>>7434470
this fucking shit is meant to feed an army of tourist
course we got fucking mustard
>tosses Ruby the mustard

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>>7434483
>Hands a jug of ketchup to the Pikachu

>>7434527
Plan M.
>Throws a jug of mustard at her instead

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>>7434527
>>7434535
No you are not fleeing.
>Hal uses Thunder Wave

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>>7434403
Well, that's - hold on.
(In a complimentary few seconds, the Chespin would quickly act upon reflex, disabusing his attempt of being bagged)
That's pretty ill, I guess. I know a few carpenters myself.

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>>7434473
Then I'm definitely not eating your as-
Ugh.
Hold on.
That Moon bitch is back.
>Pulls a fucking bat out of his chest
Nighty night, bitch.

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>>7434547
>Catches in bag!
>>7434562
Oww...
>Reach into bag.
>Evens its a paralyz heal odds its a bottle of mustard
>Take a swig regardless
>>7434570
oh nooo

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>>7434529
No problem.
>She pours herself some whiskey and downs it.
Man, today was fucking crazy.
>>7434563
I try to help people. You know, street justice.

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>>7434563
Then Hal's job here is done
>Hal throws an Ice Beam in the direction of Lille, just in case, before returning home

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>>7434619
>Lillie catches the ice beam in her bag.
Sweet.

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>>7434584
It's Lillie, right?
Lille, what the fuck do I do with the body?

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>>7434639
Dump it somewhere rocky. If you dump it in the ocean she'll come back as a Dhelmise.

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>>7434105
-.-. --- .-.. .-. . ... ... / -.-. --- .-.. .-. . ... ... / .-- .... .- - / -. --- .--

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>>7434614
>Sipp

Yeah, yeah it was. Never thought I'd be doin this today, that's for sure.

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>>7434664
>He scratches Unit One under it's chin.
Why don't you talk to a few people posting on the imageboard?
Take some time to talk, you've done well today.

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>>7434663
Does this bitch have any friends or relatives I need to worry about?
>Ditto fuckig drags the body
Tell your brother to fucking work out more for me

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>>7434687
Never in my life thought I'd get to see some baseball player make a Regi stumble.
That was fucking amazing, you know that?

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>>7434707
Just a mom. She won't be a problem in a moment.
>Lillie hops into her bag.
>Evens she ends up at Moon's house odds she ends up at Snowpoint.

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>>7434584
Oh, well.,that's not what I was picturing, but you do you. Best an underground fighter than a pig you can't trust at all.
No offense to the officer that posts here.

>>7434743
>>7434614

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>>7434721
Hahah, well, I don't know about amazing, but it was pretty cool I guess.

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>>7434693
>UNIT ONE: PROCESSOR: OVERHEAT
>DISTRIBUTE HEAT: ACROSS CHASSIS
>REDIRECT PROCESSING LOAD TO: SECONDARY PROCESSOR
--- -.- .- -.-- / -.-. --- .-.. .-. . ... ...
>>7434256
.... . .-.. .-.. --- -....- / .. - / .-.. --- --- -.- ... / .- ... / .. ..-. / -.-- --- ..- / ... .--. . .- -.- / - .... . / ... .- -- . / -.-. --- -.. . / .. / -.. ---

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>>7434743
Yeah. You'll have to meet Rust. They're worse than me.
>Nervous laughter.
>>7434769
No, seriously. That was cool as fuck. You gotta teach me how to do that sometime.

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>>7434742
You do that.
>Tosses the body out the window and jumps after it

>>7434785
>kiss robit

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>>7434813
I stuffed her body into my bag. You won't have to worry about anything.

>>7434813
>>7434845
Alola police? I think I'm witnessing a murder

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>>7434806
Uh, I mean, I just kinda..jumped at it.

I have no idea how I managed to do it actually.

>Sip

>>7434845
>Evens: Cops are there and not fucking around.
>Odds: They're too slow to prevent a getaway

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>>7434854
>>7434873
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
>Flee!

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>>7434845
She had a fucking Type: Null
As much as I'd like to make more Gladion x Silvally photoshoots I'm gonna give it to an expert.
.... Who isn't here.
Second best thing: I transfer it to the expert's boyfriend.
>Type: Null traded to N
>>7434854
No you aren't.
Shh.
>>7434873
>GETAWAY: Happen
YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME COPPERS

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>>7434806
Why? What's up their sleeve?

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>>7434857
>She puts her drink away.
Either way that was super rad. You're freakin' amazing man.
You got a place to stay?

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>>7434946
You'll know when you meet them. Woo boy.
What are you up to, bud?

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>>7434950
Nnnnope.

Kinda got sidetracked when I got here, then all that crazy happened, so ah, yeah. haha

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>>7434936
Sweet.
I gotta go hide out for a while. Don't get my brother in too much trouble.

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>>7434993
>Teleports a spoon to where the sun does not shine
>Evens: Pocket
>Odds: Flesh pocket

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>>7434993
I'll try not to.
>Transforms into Archie and jumps into the water

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>>7434992
You can crash at my place. I've got a futon.
You wanna jet? I'm pretty damn tired.

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>>7434967
Plenty.
I'm making strides in Hoenn to see a live primer, or something of the sort. Sight seeing, expanding Team Ecos word. That drivel.

It's pretty neat. I keep running into this big mean clumpy guy in black armor, though.

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>>7435058
Thanks.

Yeah, I guess. All that kinda took it outta me.

>Finishes my drink and gets up

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>>7435078
Big mean clumpy guy in black armor?
What, like Guts?
>>7435097
Cool. I'm probably gonna crash out as soon as we get home. You're free to the fridge or whatever though.
>Lead Joe Schmoe to apartment. Wooo.

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>>7435148
Aight, cool. I probably won't grab anythin besides a drink or something.

>Follow the Sabi

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>>7435148
I don't know any of these names well enough to tell you, so...maybe? He was screaming at me.

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>>7435212
Nah you saved my butt you're welcome to my place.
>Unlock door and crash on couch.
Mi casa es su casa. You're welcome to the bed or whatever you need.
>>7435234
Maybe Ghetsis. Probably Ghetsis.

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>>7435234
>>7435284
Is someone looking for me?
GO GO GHETSIS, CAESAR SALAD
>evens ghetsis launches a caesar salad at Chespin
>odds the ingredients spray all over Chespin, along with Ranch dressing

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>>7435284
>Floats in
>Places a bottle of ketchup on the table
>Evens, it's normal, and has a coupon for mustard on the side
>Odds, it's spoiled. But the printed date says it's fresh.

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>>7435338
Oh! Oh!
That's me in that!
Teeeheeeheee!

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>>7435284
Kayo, friendo.

>Plops down in a chair and sets down my bag of bats and junk
>Casually starts cleaning off bat#1

>>7435355
. . .
>Shifty stare at ketchup

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>>7434936
>Pokeball lands on his lap
..... okay?
>>7435369
>Urge to murder intensifies

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>>7434826
>ANON'S LIPS: BURNT
>CAUSE: HEATED CHASSIS
>APOLOGETIC BEEPING

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>>7435338
Aw crap, not again!
>he'd get a face full of salad, causing him to twitch his nuzzle and quickly smear it off
Not cool, man!

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>>7435382
...
>The bottle sits enticingly on the table, silent.

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>>7435338
>>7435355
What? Why?
>>7435382
>>7435456
I can't remember the last time I bought ketchup.

>>7435452
>CONTINUED KISSES FOR HOT ROBIT

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>>7435454
Go Go ghetsis, french fries
>evens French fries pop out of his chest and Ghetsis hands them to Chespin
>odds: they are way, way too salty

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>>7435464
...

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>>7435456
. . .
>Hunts
>Into the trash with ya

>>7435464
If ya do anytime soon, get heinz. It's much better.

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>>7435475
.--. .-.. . .- ... . / ... - --- .--. .-.-.- / -.-- --- ..- / .- .-. . / --. --- .. -. --. / - --- / .. -. .--- ..- .-. . / -.-- --- ..- .-. ... . .-.. ..-. .-.-.-
>UNIT ONE: SHIFT AWAY FROM THE ANON
>REASON: ANON FACIAL INJURIES

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>>7435464
>>7435500
>>7435506
>Shoots in through the window

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>>7435475
Please leave Unit One alone.

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>>7435513
Uuuugh.
>She goes and closes the curtains.

>>7435535
>kiss the colress
>>7435510
>kiss bug

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>>7435513
. . .
Okay

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>>7435506
...
>The condiment ghost floats in again
>He places a bottle of Heinz ketchup on the table
>And leaves

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>>7435564
.--. .-.. . .- ... . / -.-. . .- ... . / - .... .. ... .-.-.- / -.-- --- ..- .-. / .-.. .. .--. ... / .- .-. . / -... . --. .. -. -. .. -. --. / - --- / -... .-.. .. ... - . .-. .-.-.-
>UNIT ONE: FLEE BACK TO COLRESS
>REASON: ANON'S SAFETY

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>>7435564
Stop. Do not kiss my unit.
>>7435581
Hello Unit One.
>He scratches the robug under the chin.

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>>7435575
..Yeah okay that works.

Thanks, condiment spook.

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>>7435551
>>7435568
>shoot into another window

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>>7435600
I will pay you one hundred dollars to fuck off.

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>>7435600
>The window is broken.
Okay.
>She draws the curtains and goes back to the couch.

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>>7435609
>>7435614
>Throw shotgun in through window

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>>7435592
>UNIT ONE: HAPPY BEEP
>ACTION: FLOP ONTO LAP

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>>7435636
. . .

>Shotgun get

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>>7435636
Yeah I didn't need windows.
Thanks.

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>>7435639
>Pet robug.
Has your day been entertaining?

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>>7435647
>>7435662
>Throw in a self help book.
>Note: Sorry for breaking your windows.
>Attached: 10,000P

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>>7435673
>HEATING ISSUE: NOT ACTUALLY FIXED
-.-- . ... --..-- / -... ..- - / .. / .... --- .--. . / - .... .- - / .- -. --- -. / .-. . -.-. .. . ...- . ... / .- - - . -. - .. --- -. / ..-. --- .-. / .... .. ... / ..-. .- -.-. . / -... . ..-. --- .-. . / - .... . / -.. .- -- .- --. . / .. ... / .--. . .-. -- .- -. . -. - .-.-.-

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>>7435711
>Robug still very warm.
>He keeps petting the robug.
I'm sure he will. Don't worry about him.

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>>7435711
>Floats in
>Hands the robug a bottle of ketchup
>Leaves

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>>7435702
Oh, okay.

>Tip hat down and lean back in chair
>Snoozemode: Engaged

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>>7435702
>Take money.
>Toss book.
>Sleep on couch.

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>>7435737
>UNIT ONE: HAPPY BEEPING
>UNIT ONE: LEAN INTO TOUCH AND PARTAKE IN THE HUMAN EMOTION OF BEING CONTENT
>>7435743
>UNIT ONE: LACKING HANDS OR GRASPING DIGITS
>KETCHUP: FALLS TO GROUND
.. / -.. --- -. .----. - / --. . - / .. - .-.-.- / .-- .... .- - / .. ... / - .... .. ... ..--..

Fucking hell it's way too goddamn hot in Alola. I miss my home back in Snowpoint.

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>>7435777
>Mental note: Robug is super cute
>Continue applying pets

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>>7435777
>The ghost floats in again
It's a condiment.
You add it to stuff.
>Squirts it onto some fries
>Sets the bottle and the fries near Genesect

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>>7435777
Worst mythical.
>stab critical v creates in general direction

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>>7435825
Genesect can't eat.
>>7435833
>Dubsmiss
That was sad.

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>his Kadabra uses teleport to get into N and Gladions private Bathroom
>takes a shit in the toilet
>teleports out without flushing or washing his hands

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>>7435833
>>7435842
>attempts to avenge victini's miss

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>>7435911

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>>7435809
>HEATING PROBLEMS: CONTINUE TO ESCALATE
>>7435825
>UNIT ONE: LACKS MOUTH OR ANY FORM OF INTAKE VALVE.
>SOLUTION: STARE AT FOOD AND THINK OF WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE TO EAT

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>>7435489
Fortunately, that's how I li-
N-not like a salt lick! Sigh.

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>>7435833
>>7435911
Tonight only on stream: see Victini and Rayquaza crit themselves with their own nukes

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>>7435987
Hmm... Adding in a method of eating would help you to understand things better.
>Pet cute robug.
>Really have to fix this heating problem.
>...Maybe a cooled coat instead.

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>>7435911
>>7435918
>this blastburn better fucking work
>i dont care if its crit or not, must purge worst legendary

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>>7435878
.... okay?
The janitor will get that, I sup-
>Toilets autoflush because high tech bathrooms fucking better
Okay.

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>>7436047
>it was that big a shit it clogs the pipe

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My trainer keeps laying down and not talking to me. He's been there for three hours is this normal for humans??

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>>7436033
Gooid going you critted yourself again.

>>7436070
Unless he's asleep, it isn't at all normal and you should get the ambulance and holy shit that's a creepy smile

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>>7436029
>UNIT ONE: PRODUCE STEAM FROM VENTS
>UNIT ONE: MAKE A WHISTLING SOUND SIMILAR TO TEA KETTLE

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>>7436114
9:07AM
Should I call them?

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>>7436139
>The pain is temporary the science is forever.
>Keep applying the pets.

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>>7435833
>>7435842
>>7435911
>>7435918
>>7436028
>>7436033
>>7436114

>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>CURSE YOU GENESECT

>STOP MAKING MY FRIENDS MISS AND CRIT THEMSELVES

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>>7436146
Frankly, I don't know.

>>7436139
>REGICE: POUR COOLANT INTO UNIT ONE THROUGH EVERY ORIFICE

0100011101101111011001000010000001100100011000010110110101101110011010010111010000101100001000000100001101101111011011000111001001100101011100110111001100101110

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>>7436167
>UNIT ONE: RECIPROCATE
>POKE COLRESS

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>>7436270
REGICE: FORGOT TO MATERIALIZE

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>>7436281
>Hands ketchup to Regice

>>7436268
He said I should use sleep powder four times is that bad?

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>>7436307
>REGICE: ACCEPT KETCHUP
>KETCHUP: REFRIGERATES INSTANTLY BUT DOES NOT FREEZE

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I like to rape wild pokemon.

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>>7436417
>icicle crashes shitposting jackass

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>>7436062
>Loud sighing
Okay.
The janitors will get it.
>Goes the fuck back to sleep

>dexposting
how do people deal with this

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>>7436435
>notices your bulge

Hide and ignore.
Anyway I cant sleep how is everyone?

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>>7436435
>Gropes crotch

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>>7436435
Oh wow whats this...

>>7436479
Practice

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(I did a thing, was gonna be mostly for the porygon posters but they've mostly stopped their binary/hex posting so its mostly morse for now, still not perfect though. The hurr look at me bit is a placeholder.)

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It took me a few days, but I finally managed to cross Desert Resort, and now I'm typing this from a motel in Nimbasa City. I'm STILL finding sand in my shoes, too. I haven't seen what plays might be happening here in the next few days, but I'm planning on seeing one of them at least before I move on again.

>>7433081
What kind of things happened while I was gone? I just left there, and I was without internet while trying to cross over Desert Resort.

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!!!

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>>7437938
Hot dogs happened!

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>>7436014
Speaking of salt, I passed out in a nearby beach close to you're position Reese, dont know the exact beach though. long story short boat went off course I swam the rest of the way.

I passed out on the beach front over night, now I feel sick. What exactly happens if an ice type is exposed to salt for more than 8 hours? Cause I don't think it's a good thing... Halp

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>>7438934
Well if you're anywhere near Dewford town I might be able to help get you to the nearby Pokemon centre.
Although I think Reese went to go sightseeing after I fell asleep, so I don't know if he's still near here.

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>>7438962
Dewford town? Dewford town... dewfor...

>Passes out

>>7439418
(-Aloan vulipx)

Is it weird to hug my Parasect?

>>7439440
Depends on how tolerant you are to a faceful of spores

>>7439518
Pretty tolerant at this point. Some chick looked at me like I started making out with him.

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>>7439418
>Has spent the last 20 minutes searching the island
>Spots Alola Vulpix passed out on the sand

I think I've found you, the Pokemon centre dudes are right behind me.

>Pokemon centre staff are running after Sandslash, carrying some potions and full restores
>They rush over and try to work out how badly Vulpix is hurt

>Odds = You're gonna need a trip to the Pokemon centre asap
>Evens = Nothing serious, they're able to heal you up

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>>7438796
>>7438863
so dudes
we got an entire region to comb
where the hell do you guys wanna go first

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>>7439667

>looks like the beach salts badly warmed her up in a bad way
>she needs medical attention right away if she doesn't she'll unironically suffer from a heat stroke and may die
>Very faint breathing is heard

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>wake up in a cuddle pile with a mouse and a snek
>Remember what happened last night
Oh god Lucy's gonna kill me.
...Oh god this fucking chemical cocktail of lust is going to kill me first.

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>>7439728
We may have a cure for Goodra phermones.
I would have to ask Colress.

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>>7439676
>A condiment ghost floats by
>Hands you a bottle of Heinz ketchup, then flies off

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>>7439786
thanks ghost
ill be sure to make you proud

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>>7439711
Hang in there, you're gonna be alright!
>Vulpix is rushed off to get urgent medical attention
>Sandslash follows all the way until the Pokemon centre, where Vulpix is taken inside to be treated