Undyne thread - Gosh, I Love Her High-Waisted Pants edition
Previous thread >>7032603
Image Collections:
https://photos.google.com/share/AF1QipMJG9JzAKEepVOdMsUkjkIUX9HoQxrPjZJIyoIRBrezThzRr3WcIgkvc-DY-sttMQ?key=aDE2UlBEYmNZZXpWV2QyRHBZUjF6cm51TmlkbE13
https://mega.nz/#F!x0RyxRKA!W23J8H5SWKjrszWEjX74jw
https://mega.nz/#F!fJ1D0ToC!jaLGre_xR2LEGfMAUfmZ2A
https://mega.nz/#F!ZxQnALTQ!RJ0CyfW3tP5HzKy4YQHbXA
https://mega.nz/#!O91UwagR!VFNzTchEmdLenigC5AU4DYAqIUsgudhrf9Q66TUU3QU
*IMPORTANT*
If you have many or rare Undyne images, please consider sharing your collection too!
Resources:
Search Tips, Information, and Archives -> http://pastebin.com/AVdzDCdU
Comfy fish stories -> http://pastebin.com/Xf3GR6TA
Reposting for new thread
http://alice-books.com/item/show/2453-3
>>7081502
The proportions on that make her look like a toddler to me
>>7081553
That artist has a cartoony style.
There are other artists contributing to that doujin, too.
>>7081577
those gills are delicious though
unf
After last thread I feel like I should start a shark girl thread
>>7081783
god that's cute
>>7081601
I want to touch those gills!
>>7081826
>+5 cuteness
>>7081836
I want to cum on those fins!
>>7080981
>>7081078
Again we pay the price of them being assholes...
It's sad.
>>7081104
I'm happy those thread lives now, i start to repeat myself but 10 threads before, i was bumping 80% of the thread alone, so i'm very, very happy for it to come this far
(Sorry for bad english too, my working day exhausted me)
>>7081890
Thanks for doing your part! And your english is fine, too! I've been doing the same in the /rwg/ thread in /vg/ to keep it alive and now it's super alive.
>>7081875
L-Lewd.
Are those fins erogenous zones? Would that be the ideal place to keep your hands busy while making out with her?
>>7082027
The gills, according to the writefag
>>7082027
It's nothing, i love the fish so, i did it for her and it made me happy and still is!
Anyways, good night fellow fishermans, i'm working tomorrow (yeah my work schedule is strange)
Underwater woman
Underwater lady
No one on the shore
Will ever know
Whats in her heart
>>7082168
That's a cute Undyne.
>>7084270
this is pretty cozy, anon
> mentioning bad girls earlier
I think the best kind is the bad, tough girl who once you're alone and snuggling turns into jelly.
Those are a best
>>7084737
This.
They're the type that acts tough and badass around their boyfriends in public, making everyone nearby wonder why she fell for someone who is almost nothing like her. Unbeknownst to them, her favourite past times are snuggles, head pats, and affectionate nuzzling.
>>7084460
It is.
>>7084846
People ask
>what if she's abusive to you anon?
And I always respond that I love a woman who can kick my ass.
To which ask if I dig being a sub. To which I have no response because I've always been the Dom in any relationship that went that far.
>>7082027
>>7085204
Fin and gill play needs to be more of a thing.
>>7086029
The writefriend already did a story about gill-play, though I wouldn't mind seeing it introduced in more works. Mostly as an aside to the story.
The Chara x Undyne fic is going smoothly, I guess. Going to start working on the "saucier" bits soon. Thinking of perhaps doing an alternative ending, maybe, for people that want something harder. Though I don't want to delay too long, I'm not a writer so I don't write too quickly.
>>7086463
That was the first undyne pic I ever saw. It made me go;
>who is this one eyed fish lady?
>why is she so funny?
>what is her deal with spaghetti?
>goddamn red hair turns me on.
I bought undertale the next day and well...here we are
Speaking of writefaggotry, here'a my attempt at writing that isn't just ripping off the writefag.
http://pastebin.com/rbvsgE8y
It's kinda short but I'm actually having fun writing about this, so if anyone has requests/critique/feedback let me know.
Also here's the last one if you missed it since it was right at the end of the last thread.
http://pastebin.com/EygffhL7
>>7087317
>>goddamn red hair turns me on.
are you me?
>>7087351
>"WE'RE PLAYING MONOPOLY!"
toppen kek
>>7087414
>red hair
>tomboy tendencies and fashion sense
>bark and bite attitude complete with hidden soft side
>scars
>/fit/
She checks literally every box I have. It's goddamn uncanny
>>7086625
Keep up the good work, lad. Can't wait to see how it turns out.
>>7087551
>toriel
Easy to understand as goatmom is pretty damn great
>>7087702
This scene made my day.
Side note, can we all take a moment to appreciate that one guy made a dumb JRPG game using MS Paint and Game Maker, and now, a year and a half later, it still has an active /vg/ thread, occasional /aco/ threads, and active threads for two individual characters in /trash/?
>>7087811
Technically 2 people iirc. Toby fox and "temmie" I don't know the actual name of the person
>>7087851
Unless that was all just a giant gag the name being mentioned in the credits all those times
I like when artists show her gums when she's smiling. Idk why.
>>7087943
I like when artists draw her with really long, sharp teeth. Something about it just turns me on.
>>7088444
This anon knows what's good in life.
>>7088444
>>7088503
I want to do things to this fish.
>>7088618
>>7088727
Would these things end in pregnancy? Could a human even knock up a fish monster?
>>7089227
Only one way to find out.
>>7089392
Mah nigga
>>7089392
>>7089227
L-Lewd.
writefag here, I've been lurking on my phone all day but it's been agony not being able to post. things are winding down here so I think I'll be able to write a story tomorrow night. tomorrow's looking boring at present so I want to kick ideas around before I get started - reply to this post if you want a story written.
>>7089227
I have some ideas.
>>7089227
As a non-native english speaker, I find the expression "knock up" fucking funny.
>>7090311
As a native English speaker I can attest. It is pretty fucking funny.
Also the word scuba.
Is Undyne black?
>>7090485
She's blue.
>>7090498
>>7090485
>HumanTale
>>7090780
>>7090830
what would be her nationality based on her skin color and facial traces?
>>7090780
There's nothing wrong with humanized Undertale characters.
>>7090848
sure, if they don't look like this
>>7090830
I say that but...it really depends on preference at that point I guess.
Typically nstural redheads are white so...
>>7090845
Hmmm...honestly given her depiction here id lean towards Irish.
Though for the life of me I can't picture her with an accent
>>7090873
Delet that this instant
>>7090873
>muh multiculturalism
>that USA today tier artwork
No I won't apologize I hate that style of art
>>7090929
Father was Irish, Mother was an American (or flip that around)? Raised in Ameriga, so some form of American accent?
I think this could work.
She could also be Canadian. I find that amusing, considering the stereotypes.
>>7090969
it's okay, I hate when it's shoved shamelessly in my face too, but I like how undertale represented it subtly
(the artstyle and """"gender identities"""" of the characters are fucking disgusting)
>>7090472
I second this.
/MTT/ here, lmao we're better than y'all
Legs > Fish
>>7091673
Get out
>>7091673
>y'all
wtf mtt nigger
>>7091673
>A FUCKING BOX
>>7091673
RRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>7091673
Here's your (You)
>>7091673
Now now, there's no need to fight.
>>7091871
A bad (as in [not very good]) fic which will focus on teeth? And ice cream maybe
are Undyne's teeth an erogenous zone?
>>7091981
How would that even work?
>>7092088
Not him, but I imagine her teeth would just be super sensitive and give her orgasms when stimulated. It would make eating a chore, though, and eating noodles would be the equivalent to tentacle porn.
I want to lick Undyne's teeth
I need pictures of her in her date outfit.
I need it.
>>7092209
You and about five other guys, pal
>gangbang style fetish porn but solely with a bunch of niggas jutting out their tongues and touching Undyne's teeth
I can't even say I wouldn't fap to that
>>7092428
>>7092132
>and eating noodles would be the equivalent to tentacle porn
Holy shit, anon, this needs to be written RIGHT NOW.
>>7092502
>>7092527
>>7092537
>>7092553
>>7092564
>>7092570
>>7092598
>>7092609
>>7092635
>>7092643
>>7092666
>>7092679
>>7092513
Will consider. Maybe after my Chara x Undyne story.
>>7092700
slower you sluts
how a nigga who gotta work for a livin supposed to keep up with all this fishpostin when you burning through a thread an hour
>>7092902
AHA! We don't have this problem over in /MTT/!
MTT- 1; Fish- 0
>>7092956
Who the fuck are YOU?
>>7093492
it was a serious question
>>7092919
>>7093492
Shit poster or not at least he's staying in character.
And funny
>>7093577
Armored Undyne needs more love
>>7093592
I have some
>>7093577
you really shouldn't just go around calling everyone a shitposter
aren't we supposed to be above that
>>7093592
>>7093699
>>7093699
>>7093694
Ayyyyy, thanks
>>7093699
>>7093667
???
>>7093706
No problem, and I have more if you'd like it.
>>7093706
(you)'d one of the wrong guys, but thanks for the armor pics!
>>7093717
I posted a lower quality version by mistake.
>>7092738
One more date outfit pic.
>>7093615
>>7093694
Hey I said he was funny. That's a compliment
Armor time!
>>7093810
>>7093814
>>7093821
>>7093810
I'm glad I requested armor undynes. These are really good.
>>7093825
Here's a higher quality one.
>>7093824
>>7093841
>>7093846
>>7093853
>>7093871
>>7093884
>>7093895
>>7093900
>>7093913
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SxD4u8Q7Yh0
>>7093916
>>7093931
>>7093939
>>7093948
>>7093953
>>7093956
>>7093960
>>7093969
>>7093979
>>7093993
time for some sci-fi/modern armor
>>7093993
I really like this regal, dark souls-esque vibe on this one.
>>7094008
>>7094018
>>7094023
>>7094039
>>7094043
And I think I better stop for now.
>>7094047
Much appreciated, helpful anon. I've got a nice stockpile of armored undynes for the future now.
It's also given me some artistic inspiration, too. :3
>>7094101
Glad to have inspired you, anon!
Bumping before I sleep
>>7093744
>>7086029
I always thought it was kind of odd. Wouldn't it just hurt or feel really bad? Like someone touching the tip of your lungs or nose.
>>7092919
>>7091673
Since when is there an /MTT/? There's like 5 people at most who like bot in /utg/ and I wash my hands from the omorashi and the guro guys.
Is there any Undyne scat porn?
>>7097203
>>7097284
Well?
>>7097203
I hope not
>>7097348
I don't think so and like >>7097362 said, i hope not.
slow thread today
>>7090873
...so what does that make "so-sorry" or whatever his name is?
>>7099444
autistic inflationist fetishist twat
>>7099309
Yup, i think it's because the writeanon is away for the week.
>>7099555
That, and I slept in. So that's one less person doing things in the thread :3
Also, top trips
>>7099582
Yes this is now a get threads
>>7099444
>>7099555
>>7099643
KEK IS ON OUR SIDE
>>7099755
Yeah, perhaps people are more busy around the weekend.
>>7096335
I really, really like the proportions on this Undyne. Or maybe it's just the position.
Whatever it is it's L-Lewd as shit.
>>7097203
While you're in the right place to ask this question you still need to get >>>out
>>7100194
Thank you. I try to do interesting poses that convey as much lewdness as possible usually. I didn't quite know what to do with her back since I don't really know how to shade but I'm glad you like it.
>mfw someone changed the typo in the third to last page of SOJU from ''firl'' to ''bitch''
>>7101341
kek
>>7100878
Keep it up, you've got an artstyle that I'm really falling in love with.
I love it when artists go for alluring, sexual proportions and positions without going ham on them either. I quite like curves and such, but I hate it when artists go too "alien-looking" for my tastes.
>>7101391
I was just looking at this pic when I looked up "big peridot" on google trying to find a pic of her with the limb enhancers
>>7101398
I'm working on it right now, actually. Word to the wise - have a change of pants ready.
>>7101391
Haha, to be honest I think I DO often go ham on the proportions. I've been actively trying to keep Undynes chest size in check since this pic but since I freehand everything like the lazy amateur I am, I end up doing a lot of different proportions accidentally.
>>7101398
>>7090472
Delivered: http://pastebin.com/sjUudwPi
If you're just in it for the porn I made sure it was the first part of the story.
>>7102012
I have some experience with girl on girl if you need any help.
>>7102927
that's a bold statement
>>7102927
>I have some experience with girl on girl if you need any help.
It's mostly subtle things like how girls tease other girls or what touching certain areas would feel like for both girls. That, and foreplay and maybe some l-lewd positions.
I have ideas, but if I were to keep writing girl on girl my "lack of variety" would get obvious. I'm working on the story, so it might be cool to see what you think of it when it's done.
>>7102927
>anon delivers
YUS YUS YUS
>>7103101
Generally speaking there's one girl who's more of a lesbian than the other one and while a lot of girls are pretty flexible with their sexuality when you get right down to it, some of them will need more cajoling or teasing than others. That's the dynamic that appeals most to me, anyway, even if I only get to see one end of it. Girls tease other girls basically the same as they tease guys, I suppose, I'd never really thought about it. Being suggestive enough to make the shy one blush is always fun and so on. Really a lot of writing about what you don't know requires is just the confidence to make a statement and stick with it and have an internally consistent logic even if it doesn't really make sense outside of the story.
Foreplay varies. Generally a lot of touching and teasing without going near the breasts or vagina, trying to see who breaks first. I can imagine relationships with a different dynamic, though. Hips are pretty sensitive. Unless there's like something glaringly wrong, though, I guarantee that whatever you write is going to be fine.
>>7102927
Holy shit.
>>7102927
Can you write Undyne almost getting killed during an intense training? Nothing lewd, just something with feels.
>>7103604
Do you mind if it's on the shorter side?
>>7103651
Go ahead man.
>>7102927
God damn that was good. A real rollercoaster.
>>7103670
>>7103604
Delivered: http://pastebin.com/uvTbhHK1
I think I got the sense of urgency you want but I don't know if this really hits the spot for feels.
>>7104135
That was a quick turnaround.
>>7104213
One trick I use when I have to write an action scene is to rush through it, hence why I asked him if it was okay if it was short. Doing that might make it a little less polished but I find it keeps the pressure on and keeps the pace heightened, which is more important than whatever typos or dumb things I write when I'm rushing. I can go back and fix that later...or in this case never, since I don't edit these.
>>7099444
Autism
>>7100194
Doggy is best position
>>7104357
It's the optimal breeding position.
>>7102927
Cutest thing I've read all week.
Finishing up my Chara story by tonight, getting a bit... distracted... writing it. It's pretty crispy.
>>7106573
be careful with cliches like namedropping and forced character traits, I'm looking forward to it!
>>7106573
The hype is killing me
>>7106573
>distracted
>>7109861
I write quickly and I don't do much editing. That pregnancy one, for example, the first like two scenes (so really just the sex scene) is decent but the others are kind of sloppy. Or not sloppy but just rushed. I wish I had more time to write on each story but I have other stuff to do a lot of the time so I end up going with what's going to be good enough than with what's going to be great. Most of these stories I could turn into big things like the Christmas or New Year's specials I did, sort of 5 or 6k word stories, and those I think would probably do justice to most of these concepts. If I could do nothing else but write Undyne shit all day (I'd be a lot more pathetic than I already am) I'd be able to do something like that, but I can't, unfortunately.
I keep seeing people calling these stories really good and gushing over them and it's nice for my ego of course but really, they're not, and I'm not trying to fish for compliments. I guess I have higher standards but there really isn't anything artistic about them. Maybe on a mechanical level the prose is good, you know? I think the prose is good. Other than that, though, it's just explorations of a character, and at this point it's like, well, everyone knows how I write and what I write and you either like me or you don't. Reception on here has been pretty positive so I've kept writing but I'm sure there are people who don't like what I write who just don't bother to say so. Compliments are nice but suggestions and criticism is a lot nicer, at least for me. I'll shut up and wait for the other fic, though, although after like two hours I'm getting maybe a little impatient.
I drew Undyne on Swapdoodle. Yes, I know, I'm the next Kkhoppang.
>>7110064
that is a seriously ghetto hairstyle
>>7110647
Mettaton stole her straightening iron
>>7110027
Just a note as a one time write fag (no real time for it anymore sadly)
Introspection never did me any good. No matter what others said I'd look back at my own work and think: "this is awful. I could do so much better."
It's a artists curse. No matter what you make you will look at it either now or a year from now and go: look at that trash. It's awful.
Despite the fact that you made something really cool
>>7111208
My experience is that the only person you need to be able to please is yourself. If you're able to write stuff that you think is good, not just because you wrote it, you know, but because it's genuinely good and your taste is good enough to be able to know the difference. All the stuff I've written that's gotten published is stuff that I've liked because it was good and that I knew was good stuff.
>>7106573
I wrote a thing. It's my first "erotic" story I've ever written and the first non-academic story I've written in the longest while so I don't mind criticism and things...
http://pastebin.com/EJcqqhHd
>>7110027
Sorry for taking my time, I'm not exactly a fast writer. Though I should take your advice and just machine gun them out. I find that taking breaks hurts my "flow" more than it helps it.
>>7111373
Alright, now that I actually sat down and finished it, that was pretty good. Want some pointers?
Here is a crappy Undyne lewd.
>>7111580
holy shit
>>7111549
Yes!
That would be great, I mean. Ahem. I think the story was alright, too, but it kinda reminds me of a jenga tower with bits and pieces poking out.
>>7111624
What?
>>7111580
Work on your hands. Keeping them in "unnatural" poses makes them stand out, it's also a big part of posing.
:3
>>7111580
It's not that bad.
Better than I could do.
>>7111739
Thanks, I'll try. But man, hands are my nemesis.
>>7111373
das pretty hots
Are you going to work on a second one? Perhaps one with Chara getting her "revenge"?
>>7111654
We both know you know how to write, so that's not the issue. Like, the other guy, you look at his stuff and you know that he's just starting to explore, right, but if you read your stuff or my stuff, you can tell that we know what we're doing. But that makes the problems, when there are significant ones, more subtle and more difficult to address. I did like your story, it's not high art or anything but a few times when I was reading it I thought 'man this feels like my writing' which, to any bystander, isn't me being egotistical, that's high praise from any artist because every single artist thinks they're the absolute best, I guarantee it.
The things I didn't like: poor word choice in some cases, possible tone and pace issues.
As far as the poor word choice goes, there were a few moments where it felt a little too wordy and formal, and other places, especially toward the end, where you had me rolling my eyes with how smutty you were writing. My personal preference is more toward subtlety than overtness, and even if you're being overt I find that the more you leave up to the reader's imagination, the better it's going to be. Writing about sex in the first place is tricky, because it's like nudity in theatre - as soon as somebody's naked on stage, nobody's focusing on the play and everyone's looking at the naked person. I believe that the more you hint at but the less you specifically describe the better, because if you're talking about a moan or the motion of an arm or something suggestive but not explicit, the reader fills in the explicit bit themselves just the way they like it.
(continued)
>>7111786
It's something like 'plush lips' or 'nubs' or whatever, at that point it's just so tropey that it gets lowbrow and banal, and while I realize that that's basically what you're writing, you don't have to embrace it. I like to think that I rise above that in most of my stories, and even when I'm writing something really smutty I try to avoid blunt descriptors like that because there's a point where it just starts getting vulgar, at least to me.
Another issue I had with the word choice was your use of present tense the whole time. There were a few instances where I felt like some of the wording was awkward specifically because of the present tense, like around line 37. It feels kind of pretentious and flat, and while you sort of yo-yo around on this, these instances really stood out to me. I really feel like, again, less is more when it comes to description like that.
I felt like there was a little too much telling in places too, or perhaps not so much too much telling, but more like too much detail. Like, for instance, line 37 again, do we need to know Chara reaches over? Skip it. This is maybe a do as I say not as I do moment because I'm sure I do shit like that all the time because I'm too lazy to edit my stories for this thread, but it's something to be mindful of, I think. Always be as brief as possible without compromising meaning.
I felt like your Undyne and Chara were both in a sort of in-between place in relation to how they're depicted in canon (I feel ugly even writing that word. Yuck.) and in opposition to how they would act if they were reel human beans. I think maybe going even further in the direction of making Undyne standoffish and Chara manipulative would be the stronger choice. It feels like they both acquiesce too quickly, or at least Undyne did. I think having her make more of a fight out of it before finally giving in would have been really great, but then again this is supposed to be porn...(continued again)
>>7111892
...so maybe I'm wrong and you're doing the right thing. I like character development, though. If I'm going to masturbate it isn't going to be to erotica, and I'm here for the character, not just for the nudes, and I'm sure other people feel the same way.
In the same manner I think making Chara even more blatantly manipulative would have been great, but I think that's more my personal preference than anything else. My main problem was with how quickly Undyne just gives in, kind of lost me there.
As a final note I think maybe go more subtle with the asides, they were kind of hard and fast in this and it got a little distracting. Don't make references just because you can, ideally they'd contribute to the story somehow.
Overall this was good but I think there's still room for improvement. Like you said, if it's the first non-academic story you've ever written I think this is a great starting point. Good job.
>>7111786
>>7111892
>>7111950
Thanks for the pointers. You have no idea how much they're going to help me.
Yeah, when I was writing the erotic story I was more focused on making it "appear" like some smut you might find on the internet—akin to "lemony" fanfic stories and h-games like Trials in Tainted Space where the whole idea was to string along enough descriptors of swollen vaginas that you can blow someone's load. It might sound a bit pretentious to non-writers, but you are right about "choosing to rise above" that kind of storytelling. All thing's considered, I probably underestimated how much of us here want out of a story that I knee-capped my writing to appeal to a simpler, baser level.
Maybe I'll try something more "me" next time, which all things considered is usually either silly or serious.
(You caught me with the present tense issues. I had trouble with it but I thought I had gotten away with it. The past tense is my go-to tense, but for the sake of "matching up" with some other writers, especially smut writers, I decided to move away from my comfort zone.)
>>7112084
Kek
>>7111950
Hey, I'm the guy who wrote the other stories, wasn't aware you had read my junk. If you're not already burned out from critiquing, I was wondering what gave it away that I don't really know what I'm doing?
Solid writeup by the way.
>>7112144
I'm the one who gave you those little critiques, actually. What gives you away is just like a general clumsiness. There's awkward phrasing, weird turns of phrase, stuff like that. Unfortunately the only real way to fix it is to read more and recognize what those authors are doing and try and do it yourself. I was reading at a very early age and my parents were really strict with me about that stuff (I've never even had a console, for instance), so I can attribute most of my ability to that, but if you haven't had that sort of upbringing you kind of have to play catch-up. I don't think you should stop writing, you've really nailed the Undertale feel better than anyone else here has, and there's a niche in that, but it's just the little things that need tightening up.
>>7112142
Boy, you really succeeded then. It's just a question of knowing your audience, you know, don't underestimate them.
I love you all. Best thread on 4ching. <3
>>7112239
We love you too maybe
>>7111892
You only ever write in present tense too, you know.
>>7112179
Forgive me if I'm wrong, but are you sure you're talking about me and not the OTHER other writeanon? I'm the one at >>7087351, but the only reason I ask this is because I've only every gotten 2 responses on my stuff; one of them referred to you second-hand and the other one was one guy saying he laughed.
Again, apologies if I'm incorrect, in which case your advice is appreciated.
>>7112239
AH THE L BOMB
HIDE
(we love you too)
>>7112318
To be completely frank, I do it better than he does.
>>7112334
Lmao there are too many writefags now. I did respond to your other one that you posted last thread, didn't I? I thought I did. I liked the monopoly one better than the date one. I suppose the date one was true to her character but eh, I'm not really in love with that depiction of Undyne. I think your writing is serviceable and in that regard I think the monopoly one too was better than the date one, the date one had some flat writing in places. Are you reading your stuff out loud? That can really help find awkward spots.
>>7112389
>Lmao there are too many writefags now.
Maybe we should sign our stuff with some random initials or use monikers like "Twain" or "Tolstoy"? Actually, that last one is kinda ehhh, but we might need something in the works to make these little chats easier.
And you do write in present tense better than I do. I don't think that can be up for debate. I never gave it thought, but I found it really hard to do.
I might (I probably will) try it again for the sake of practice, however.
>>7112389
Well you're the head writefag, so we all flock to you for advice :) Perhaps we can go by a numbering system or something.
As for responding, you probably did but I don't think you said it was you. Might have thrown me off a little.
I haven't heard of reading your own stuff out loud but I'll definitely try it out. If I keep writing it'll probably be interaction between a bunch of the characters since that seems to be what I'm best at. Thanks for the tips!
>>7112443
>>7112510
I hate to use names, I don't feel like there's really any call for it presently. What I do wish is if there was a way to ask for ideas more than once or so without feeling like I'm spamming, because that drives me nuts if I ask in the morning and nobody's awake and then the thread piles up and I end up not writing anything that day.
Speaking of which, I'm going to go to bed. Tomorrow looks like a nice long day off, so I'll probably be here for most of it.
t. Turgenev
>>7112590
anon you fucking genius
Each writefag gets their own Barbosa meme
>End
>T. <writefag alias>
>>7112660
this is the perfect plaace for Barbosa memes
>>7112590
I mean, you specifically probably don't need a pseudonym, but the rest of us might. But if we are choosing pen names I got dibs on Orwell.
Either way I'm out too. G'night everyone, sleep well knowing that you have good taste.
>>7112770
>sleep well knowing that you have good taste.
Feels good.
>tfw Undyne was in my dream
>all she did was punch out Danny DeVito in a creature from the black lagoon costume
Some more "armor" undynes.
>>7091673
>>7111323
That's very true. You need to like what you're making otherwise...well I don't what you are at that point but happy isn't it.
Still that doesn't change the fact that when you look at past works you'll always find flaws. It's a curse every artist has whether a writer, musician, painter or designer.
What matters more than the flaws is what you take away from them when you do see one.
>>7113517
A bunch of jelly Undyne lewds, 2 with Jerry and 3 with Alphys
http://jellythejelly.tumblr.com/post/155517234399/
>>7113964
Jelly is a blessing.
>>7107050
>Non canon
Heh.
>>7110027
You probably have higher standards because you're an actual writer unlike most anons. People love your stuff because they're getting something decent for free in a place where you can't expect anything out of anyone. That's also why no one really criticizes any of it. We don't know how to write. Anyone can be an art critic because they're looking at something that they know should look like something but criticizing writing takes some knowledge of writing.
>>7111580
Like the other anon said. Make her do something with her hands. Put them behind her, in akimbo or on her hips for example. It does wonders for how natural it feels. Lower the crotch, it's too close to where her stomach should be. While you're at it maybe lower the hips a bit too and then make the arms a bit longer since they need to at least reach the top of her thighs to be natural. An easy way to do this is to angle her shoulders a bit downwards as well.
Good job on the breasts. I think you're improving a lot with the face too.
>>7113517
Kek.
>>7113964
Eventhough they're just sketches, there's something really lovable about Jellies style. It feels... natural.
If there's any writers out there...could I request an "Undyne gives you a messy footjob" story? Thanks!
>>7103546
Not that anon, but I just wanted to say that you are excellent at writing girl on girl.
Your Undyne x swimmer girl fic is easily the sexiest Undertale related thing I've ever read.
Nearly at the bump.
>>7114185
That's true, but I feel like people forget that I'm writing for this thread and not for an editor. If I'm doing things people don't like they ought to tell me because I'm making this stuff for you guys and if I can make it better I'd like to, even if it isn't necessarily the artistically correct choice.
>>7114593
No clue if you're still here but I'm going to get started on this right now, just something real quick to warm up for today.
>>7115264
I'm glad you liked it! That ended up being one of my favorites as well, I think it has a nice blend of character v action.
>>7114593
And delivered: http://pastebin.com/nj6A2HjG
hell of a way to wake up, honestly
>>7115613
You're doing it for the thread, true but I think the anons here don't really have much to complain about. You're pretty much already delivering what they want to see. The only critique I've seen of your work so far has been that it's all reader x Undyne. The only thing you could really ruin in a story like that is the mood or Undynes character but you don't do it.
It's like they're asking for food and they don't dare complain about it because they're hungry. Once they're satisfied or if the quality of your writing suddenly drops drastically then people might start being more picky. Depends a lot on the people though. In a hug box environment it might just not happen.
>>7115862
That was pretty hot, even though feet aren't my fetish.
Could I request another story about Undyne having a romantic and/or sexual encounter with a female human?
I don't know what the theme should be this time though, the swimming theme of the last one was too perfect. Maybe it could be from Undyne's perspective?
>>7116094
You're right, just a writer's instinct when you don't get any criticism I suppose.
>>7116283
You surely may, any specifics you have in mind?
>>7116301
>You surely may, any specifics you have in mind?
Not really. If another anon has an idea of if you've already thought of something, then I'll go with that!
>>7116362
>>7116462
It's so bizarre but so fitting at the same time.
>>7116462
>>7116528
(messed up the framerate)
>>7116462
How would Undyne even adapt to the human world as Captain of the Guard? Would she adopt firearms or would she go for the sci-fi cybernetics route and wield a lightsaber spear like genji or some shit.
>>7116339
>>7116283
Delivered: http://pastebin.com/Tw8BV62M
I'm a little unsure of Undyne's character on this one, I think the beginning is a little shaky. Let me know what you think.
>>7117035
>>7115862
Damn, this sure was something to wake up to!
>>7117035
Thank you for doing my request! I thought it was really cute (and wow that ending!)
I'm not knowledgeable enough about writing to give any useful critique, but I didn't thunk her character seemed too off.
>>7117289
>thunk
oh god, case in point
>>7104135
While the fight is done well enough, I'm a bit confused about Chara being the one that fights Undyne. Was there something that I missed where Chara makes their return?
>>7118098
sunday dress Undyne is a cute! A CUTE!
>>7117035
Can I request a story where Undyne is alone with the reader in a cabin up in the mountains.
>>7118016
A while ago someone requested Chara on a date with Undyne, and then I hadn't used the character again so I figured I might as well. Here's the original: http://pastebin.com/LtAZWEys
>>7118167
http://pastebin.com/fJuU6tVE and http://pastebin.com/wJsCnV4b are pretty similar to this already, although the first one isn't my best work.
>>7116631
Now THIS is canon Undyne!
>>7118551
>Writeanon asks for lesbian Undyne fanfic ideas
>Nobody even think of hot college age fukufire or tentacle girl
Sadness.
>>7117035
I am like seriously in love with these first-person Undyne stories
>>7118759
Now there's an idea.
>>7118759
Oooh, now there's an idea.
I have the new thread all ready to go, so make a good last post.
LET'S GO PUNK!
QUICK POST GOATS FOR LAST POSTS
new >>7119075
>>7119056
No thanks.
>>7119056
>>7119104
This is acceptable.
>>7118882
All my want. I request this