ITT: Pokemon Are Real. Universe 2. What does PAR think of Kanto's

>>10482560
cock vore is legal

well there goes that interesting thing

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>>10482579
COCK VORE IS NOT FUCKING LEGAL.
I CANNOT BELIEVE I HAVE TO SAY THIS.

>>10482682
cock
vore

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>>10482560
well it somes of it's laws are a bit unnecessery
>>10481924
alright, well i hope you do what you need to do
>>10481959
well i hope it all goes well for you

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>Surge is DONE
GOOD NEWS! KANTO HAS BEEN CLEARED OF CORRUPT BREEDERS! ALL CURRENTLY OPEN DAYCARES ARE SAFE TO USE!

>>10482682
Ah, Lance, I seem to have deleted an important email. When are we proceeding with the voting for the annexation of Sinjoh, among other bills?

>>10482682
Is regular vore legal?

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>>10482560
Somehow shittier than Orre.
>Time to check out these ice houses.

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>>10482690
No.
>>10482733
No.
>>10482730
The 31st.
I'm going to be abstaining from the vote because I was the one who had to put them into circulation. Feels a bit biased if I were to put my opinion on them.

>>10482764
..Soft vore?

>>10482741
fuxk off turts

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>>10482579
Dare I ask what cock vore is?
>>10480129
Alright I'll be there in a bit

>Evens last number is thread posts until successfully locating the building, odds is last two numbers

(I'm dropping Almian Psychic, I don't know what the fuck I was thinking, sorry.)

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>>10482741
>There are no ice houses what are you talking about
>All of the buildings that are still standing are stone of some sort, with some even looking like they were made out of rudimentary concrete
>You can also hear the sounds of battle in the distance
>A weeb in a black coat is training with a Dragonite, a Honedge, and a Typhlosion

>>10482889
(You're fine dude, we all make mistakes, it's just a matter of learning from them)

>>10482889
cya turts ems gonna play the umbreon he called you out with still
btfooooo

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>>10482912
>Houses in the ice, coldhouses, icehouses
>Come on.
>Scope out the weeb.

>>10482889
(I thought he was interesting, it was kind of cunty of Em to call you out but whatever.)

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>>10482560
Dumb, but at least Kanto is cleaning itself up first.

>>10482682
Ask yourself why do you have to say that in the first place.

>>10482694
Tomorrow its time for a bit of training, I think MAG is onto something.

>>10482730
How many daycares left?

>>10482827
See you soon.

>>10482889
(It is a good char man, we can retcon out the last few minutes and resume as if nothing happened)

>>10482964
(With the umbreon I wanted to give him a traveling companion but then it turned out he was human and, well, I lost interest because I'm a cunt, so it looked like a callout)

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>>10482919

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>>10482560
I'm worried they're going to go overboard, start imposing the old sodomy laws again in addition to the whole annexing-other-Regions talk.
>>10482730
Lieutenant Surge, sir? As a Kantonian citizen, may I offer some input on the current state of things?

>>10482994
>Thiswillbegreatformycollection.jpeg

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>>10482976
I was only able to leave maybe one in ten daycares standing in the end, a real disappointment, but it is my hope that other honest breeders will take up the opportunity and start new businesses in the old locations and bring the numbers back up.

>>10483004
Of course!

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>Sound of papers being shuffled.
Hello, this is an announcement coming from your acting Hoenn Champion, Steven Stone. We're, uh...
>More paper sounds.
>You can hear a hand cover the mic.
Drake ... the fuck is this? No, what? When did we vote on this? WHAT?

>The announcement resumes, Steven sounds pissed.
Ahem, the Hoenn Elite Four is voting to follow Kanto and Johto's imitative. Starting this coming monday all people without a trainer's licence will be required to purchase and maintain one or they will be unable to-
>The mic is blocked again.
What the fuck is this? You can't do this! Fucking hell.

>The announcement resumes again.
All... Persons without a licence will be unable to take governmental jobs.
>Steven clears his throat.
Devon will always have a place for those that do not want a licence.
>The announcement cuts abruptly.

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>>10483170
you what

So who wants to firebomb the Kanto E4 building?

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>>10483170
...That's bad, right?
PAR, is that bad?

>>10483296
Yes that's bad. Very bad.

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>>10483029
Sir, I've got mixed feelings on the situation back home.
On one hand, my team and I admire what you've done cleaning up the Breeders' industry in Kanto. It's probably one of the biggest and best reforms in my lifetime, sir.
On the other hand, I think annexing Sinjoh is a gigantic mistake. That's a lot of territory with nobody in it, and moving this fast there's a pretty high chance of wrecking any archeological sites.
Also, I don't think the requirement that people get Trainer's licenses to hold jobs is going to work out. Just based on what I'm seeing on TrainerBook, there's a lot of people who are not fit to take up Training scrambling to get Pokemon just to comply with the new law. To put it plainly, it's already having the opposite effect than intended.

>>10483296
Yeah. That's really bad.

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>>10483314
>>10483327
...What do we do?
>Time to look around Devon for useful stuff.
>Rolling.

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>>10483029
I have a feeling any new breeders may get on it even faster and loose with the regulations, for the reasons >>10483327 said.

>>10483170
Uh, oh...

>>10483296
>>10483389
Very. Consider emigration.

>>10483389
Firebomb the Kanto E4 for starting all this.
Decapitate surge on live tv.
Plenty of options.

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Yare yare dawa...
I'm making this announcement short and sweet. If Sinnoh follows the footsteps of Kanto, Johto and Hoenn I'm quitting.
I have better things to do than pull my region out of a failstate.

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>>10483170
That seems like a fine idea, there are plenty of jobs not related to the government after all!
If anything it is not quite strict enough, I believe Hoenn should institute a badge requirement for government jobs!
Of course, I'm merely an outsider on that matter, Kanto and Johto are my only concerns for now.

>>10483216
I would not recommend that, anonymous, you would fail, and then be heavily sentenced for attempted terrorist acts.

>>10483327
I thank you for your honest opinion, and I am glad to see my efforts are inspiring people!
The decision to annex Sinjoh is not my own, I am in support of it, and have my own ideas for what to do with the additional land, but the idea came from outside the League, from a trusted friend of the Elite Four.
In fact, the trainer job requirements act was also from outside the League, from the same person! They seem to have Kanto's interests at heart, though I do agree that we were rash in deciding the details of the bill before we put it to a vote, and I aim to rectify that as soon as I am no longer busy with our gym situation.

>>10483458
They will have a hard time with that, as I have used my power as a Gym Leader to install what I am currently calling the Breeder Police, trusted trainers that will randomly inspect day cares every week to ensure pokemon are being properly treated! This is to ensure that things no longer fall behind as they did in the past, and that Day Cares are safe for all to use!

And now, an announcement! Gym Leaders of Kanto and Johto! I have been hearing many things this past week, but most disturbing among the rumors is that some gyms seem to be causing trouble for trainers, either through absence or bad practices! I will be visiting and inspecting every gym to ensure that we are not failing in our duties as Leaders, and this starts tonight!
>This is probably going to take a while because I'd like to actually have players picking up gym leaders before they get inspected

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>>10483516
"I would not recommend that anon"
I am going to put yours and Lances heads on a pike outside victory road.

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>>10482976
that sounds good
i should do some training when i get free time too
only having one pokemon and being just level 10 is not much

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>>10483515
I can smell Flint's sweet tears already.

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At lake of rage. i failed to release myself because i'm a dumb idiot.

>>10482560
They're alright.

>>10483515
Do you want Sinjoh?

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>>10483929
Agreed. I'm writing up a law to force him to get a haircut.
>>10483961
I have interest in Sinjoh as an archaeological and heritage site but I feel it should not be trodden on by humans.
If I had the power to I would have it be turned into a protected zone with no humans, only pokemon.
...I suppose I can try that, the trade relations between Sinnoh and Johto are still valid, it'd be passed in both areas.

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>>10483516
I don't think they are "inspired" in a good way, Surge. Maybe it is too early to tell, but, I'd compare Gym data before and after laws.

And, to be honest, daycare inspections that often should be mandatory in other regions.

>>10483909
Yeah, as long space and budget allows it.

>>10483934
Please do not jump into the lake.

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>>10483515
That is a shame, Cynthia.

>>10483834
HA, as if you would make it that far!

>>10484031
You can't please everyone, that's politics for you.

Agreed, they should be, given the state I found most of those places in!

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>>10482560
Not all of Kanto and Johto's laws are bad
We have some good ones
Like
Its not illegal to strip naked or near naked in the hunt for ghosts

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>>10483516
The teleport maze stays. That is all I have to say.

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>>10482560
They're absurd, that's all there is to say about them.

>>10484004
Please don't do that, I happen to like living here.

>>10482933
>Sorry, stuff happened
>The weeb notices you
"Oh. It's you. Please go away."

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>>10484004
Nice
Make a law requiring the E4 to only use Pokemon discovered in Sinnoh and watch him despair over his two Pokemon team.

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>>10484031
well, that is important too
>>10484089
i mean, why would you strip naked hunting for ghosts?

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>>10484070
Only a hollow headed fool takes the threat of death in jest.

Any who feel wronged and have had their liberties and rights violated are welcome with us. We must stand together to oppose these cretins and their unjust rule over us.

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>>10484070
Your choice in pokemon is a shame too. Oh no, I mega evolved my dragon.
Oh geeze, I hope you have levitate.
>>10484089
Put some clothes on before I force you into them.
>>10484114
Let humans take the area as their own? Set up homes and destroy what was built eons ago?
I think not.
>>10484120
Don't give the Kantoinese ideas, please.
How are you, Alain? I think I can hear Steven crying from here.

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>>10484162
A nearly naked man has a greater chance to absorb an evil spirit!
>>10484226
I have them on right now
Not even I would raid Lance's fridge in the nude

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>>10484111
Understood, Ma'am.

>>10484195
Only a general that's grown too big for his boots talks like that. I would like to see you try.

>>10484226
Air Balloons are rather effective with Magnezone, and Magnet Rise is a move I can use.
Or I could simply mega-evolve my Ampharos and use Dragon Pulse.

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>>10484031
Jumping in the lake would be easy though... I won't for now. I'm just so lost.

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>>10484226
Grandfather me in then, because I'm not leaving. This tower is my home.

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>>10484286
isn't absorbing a evil spirit bad?
it would mean that they spirit would try to take control of your body
and even then i don't want anyone to see me naked, not even ghosts

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>>10484226
If they actually take that joke and use it I'm going to cry.
I'm alright, just doing the Kanto gym challenge with Tobias. Maybe we'll go save Steven next.
How's Sinnoh?

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>>10484286
Scratch that. If you're nude around Lance for a full week I'll get you a Spiritomb.
>>10484324
Smack Down exists. Even though it's kind of lame.
How about I throw Spiritomb at you and we call it even?
>>10484365
Grandfather you... What?
Whatever you're smoking it must be what Tobias uses.
>>10484398
I suggest taking him before he tries something drastic. He's the middle ground between Lance's respectfulness and my, uh... Uncaringness? I suppose?
Anyway, ask him to take a vacation before he kills someone is what I'm asking.
I'm going to read up on a few old books on creating Spiritomb. Sinnoh is well, quiet but otherwise well.

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>>10484324
In due time, "Lightning American."
You will get your just deserts. As will the rest.

>>10484472
It's a law term where things that should be illegal stick around because they existed before the law was a thing.

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>>10484472
How do you not know how grandfathering works in the law? I get to stay here, but it's illegal for anyone else to try and move in, simple.

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>>10484385
It's a test of the willpower!
You take in the spirit, completely overpower its own will, and then either expel it or command it.
It's one of the ways I've found most effective for training ghosts.
>>10484472
A Spiritomb??
I'll try, but I might have to put on clothes a few times.
Gym inspections are coming up and I don't want to flash Surge.

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>>10484472
Cythnia, how much is a gun in SinnoH?
>>10484398
Alaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaainnnnnn, guess hwo got drunk

>>10484031
>after quite a bit of time, assuming somebody is home, some knocking at the penthouse door can be heard

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>>10484472
Let us call it even, agreed.

>>10484486
I haven't heard that nickname in years, for a damn good reason.
Are you one of the bastards that fought in the war!?

>>10484676
We have public indecency laws for a reason, Morty, do not break them, it is for the best.

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>>10484472
Alright, I'll kidnap Steven and drag him on our gym quest.
I thought Spiritomb were a bunch of souls in one? ... planning on cleaning up the prison system?
>>10484685
I bet a bottle of wine that it's you.
Hey Steven, how do you feel about coming with Tobias and I on our gym circuit?

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>>10484537
>>10484670
Apologies, I thought that was a typo. I'd prefer no one there, consider it a pokemon reserve rather than something that can be taken by some idiots.
Like, Surge for example.
Quincy, do you want Surge to take Sinjoh?
>>10484676
Two Spiritomb if you flash Surge.
>>10484685
We don't have guns.
>>10484750
Sinnoh doesn't use a prison system, we use a rehab system. The prison system WAS how Spiritomb were made, that was changed in the 90s.
Bringing Sinnoh into the present while preserving the culture of magic is... Difficult to say the least.

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>>10484676
well i guess, but i would never try to do that
i don't like showing myself like that
well i hope i never have to deal with ghost then, maybe i'll pick a ghost type but that's it

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From anonymous imageboard to official League business medium, who would have thought of this before.

>>10484070
Indeed.
>Write down a few ideas

>>10484362
If you can get a ticket to Unova, I guess I can try and help you.

>>10484714
>"Coming" can be heard from the other side

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>>10484788
I want it to be just me and the pokemon, I can't go back to living around other people again after the peace I've found here.
Quite frankly if someone knew a way to just turn me into a pokemon I'd be fine with it.

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>>10484800
It's not the only way to train ghosts
The normal method works too
Just takes more work
>>10484725
But Surge
Those laws don't apply when hunting ghosts
>>10484788
Uuuuhhhhhhhhh fiiiiine
You drive a hard bargain
>Morty: fuckin start stripping right in Lance's living room

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>>10484725
Sir, I think your heart's in the right place, but I'm just going spit this out.
If Kanto adopts all the recent proposals you're looking at, it's probably going to kneecap the Kantonian economy and could quite possibly start a war.
I don't think that a war of conquest is a good idea for a lot of reasons, ranging from civilian deaths to the destruction caused by insurgent action to the idea of Creepybeard the Implier up there running amok >>10484486.

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>>10484849
Would you take a robotic body in the form of a pokemon?
Just saying

>>10484714
>The door opens
>A nerd that looks way out of place here shows up
>dex in hand
"Uh, hello"
"Does your dex or similar have text to speech?"

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>>10484788
... huh. Yeah, I'm guessing you aren't going to round up volunteers. Or, well... Any more than the kid asking to be a Pokemon.

>Several doodles of Charizards soon find their way onto Tobias' cheek

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>>10484849
...How do you like Spiritomb?
Joking. If we meet in person and I could have a description of what you desire, a Banette and some time I'm sure we could work something out.
Just, ah, maybe release your pokemon beforehand. A pokemon can't have a trainer's licence.
>>10484875
Very good, Morty.
>>10484966
I'd prefer not to be a murderer myself. More than I've ever had to be at least.

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>>10484875
alright, i'll keep the normal methods, i can't bring myself to show that much shkin for anyone, that makes me really embarrased
i just hope that if i get a ghost type pokemon that it doesn't phase through the wall and peeks on me

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>>10484725
I'm shocked you have the capacity to recall such a distant memory.
The truly electrifying feat would be if you could remember me.
Farewell for now, I will require a modest force to storm your grounds.
Fie ca somnul tău să fie tulburat.

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>>10484875
...Next priority after gym inspections: fix that law so public indecency doesn't have special cases like that.
I do not need to see someone running around naked claiming they're trying to hunt down ghosts.

>>10484918
I will take that under advisement, thank you.

>>10485116
>reply chain memes

>>10485111
You must have been an enemy, I await the day I get to fry you like all the other monsters I fought.

>>10485116
Are you in Ecruteak? I'd like to meet you in person, sir.
Can we meet at the tower?

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>>10484960
If you mean like a Beldum or something then maybe I guess.

>>10485053
I'd rather not leave Sinjoh at all, but I suppose a very short trip out wouldn't be so bad.
I'll think about it.

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>>10485116
Good luck getting that to pass, asshole.
Naked ghost hunting is part of Johto tradition.
Next thing you'll say is that you want the Hadaka Matsuri gone as well.
>>10485053
Do I have to take the Fundoshi off too?
>>10485157
The Burned Tower has some spooky cultists living in it, don't visit Surge there
>>10485092
Ghost types are mischievous
They'll do it because they think it's funny

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>>10485053
>More than I've ever had to be
... what?

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>>10485183
Alright.
This will be permanent. Think hard.
>>10485204
Yes.
Absolutely.
Fundoshi on means no Spiritombs.
>>10485224
...In my younger years I did a few regretful things in the name of magic.

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>>10485295
... oh. Oh!
Solo or cult...?

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>>10485183
Uh yeah. Like a Beldum, definitely.
>Sippp

>>10485295
Kind of like those witches and other ghost specialists that show up from time to time?

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>>10484960
>The Sylveon nodded before poking and prodding at the dex's keyboard with a ribbon and after a few moments it spoke with a robotic voice
"Yes hello I appreciate you letting me stay here"
>They looked back up at the nerd with a smile

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>>10485204
that might be a problem, but i might be able to teach said ghost not to
it would be really embarrasing if i was in the shower and it suddendly licked my neck or something like that

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>>10485419
>Door fully open now
>The place looking too big and too expensive for the sole inhabitants
>A Magnemite can be seen asleep, resting in a cushion
"Feel free to crash in the couch, or, well, anywhere. Not lacking in space at the moment, heh"
>Smirk

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>>10485295
At least Lance's house is warm
I don't think he'd like traditional nude cuddles
>Fundoshi: off
>The gym leader just awkwardly sits on the floor with his back against on the wall and his scarf in his lap
>>10485441
If your ghost is licking you in the shower its a different kind of fun it wants

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>>10485627
>Lance finally comes out of his room to a nude Morty on the floor.
>He rolls his eyes, going to the fridge to grab some food.
"Did you get mugged?"

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>>10485670
"Cynthia promised me two Spiritombs if I flashed Surge and stayed nude around you for a whole week. Hey, toss me a snack."

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>>10485295
That's what I'm doing.

>>10485400
I suppose that gives me a few options then.
For now, I'll keep training.
>They haven't made much progress today
>Let's see if they can get in one more major bout before it gets too dark and Xem's wings start freezing

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>>10485600
>They nod then walk through the threshold, their wagging tail and fluttering ribbons lightly grazing against the human ass they pass and the fairy type eventually decides to hop up onto the couch

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>>10485724
"Remind me to pay Flint to flash her."
>Lance tosses Morty some chocolate.
"Movies, then?"

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>>10485627
oh
well, yeah i gues that would be the case
but i hope that is not the case, if get a ghost type pokemon on my team

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>>10485889
"Pay Flint to flash Cynthia."
>He blinks slowly as the chocolate hits him in the chest, picking it up and taking a bite
>It takes him a few moments to remember that wrappers are a thing
"Okay."
>With a huff he stands up and stretches, tying his scarf back around his neck and flopping down on the nearest couch
"What's the movie?"

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>>10485768
Just have to get a few things ready with my associates.

>>10485842
>It is a very nice couch
>Nerd watches the Sylveon claim the couch, wondering if they are all this airy
>Flop in the couch, at the Sylveon's side
"Beats a cardboard box, doesn't it"

>>10485938
>I'm so sorry for the reply memes, still kinda tired
Teeeell them your boundaries
Did you know
That Sandalwood is an aphrodisiac
Don't let your ghosts have it

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i wanna suck a gods dick

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>>10486048
>Lance claims a spot on the couch next to Morty.
"Let's see... Ringu?"
>Lance flicks through his phone, looking at movies.
>>10486167
>SIPP

>>10486167
So do I, but I've learned not to advertise it.
The locals where I am don't like it.

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>>10486125
(it's alright, i was distracted watching ex-aid, so i wasn't waiting much)
i'll try that, and no, i did not know that thanks for that trivia, i guess
i hope there isn't any of that near here

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>>10486167

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>>10486167
>Looking at his phone was a mistake
>Morty's breath hitches, the gym leader crossing a leg over the other and quickly closing out of thread
>Don't wanna pop one in front of Lance
>>10486211
"Ringu? Sounds good, yep just... I'll wait here while you put it in."
>He shifts bit, awkwardly

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>>10486167
>>10486279
Good god my sides
[memespoiler]And my dick [/Fuck you trash]

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>>10486167
>Sip
Riveting.

>>10486261
That "hope" seemed kinda awkward.

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>>10486326
>Lance sideyes Morty as he heads over to the TV, putting the disc in.
>He flops back on the couch.
"Are you alright there?"
>He reaches toward Morty.
>Roll to see if Lance can get a thigh touch off on Morty.

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>>10486114
Might want to hold off on that, I'm still thinking.

>>10486167
...Arceus' Wheel, if I were to go gay, that'd make me do it.

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>>10486114
>The sylveon taps at the dex
"Yes it does, I haven't been on anything this soft in quite a long time."
>They look around and take in the room
"How'd you land such a lavish place, last I knew you were saying you didn't have much room"

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>>10486167
...Yeah, I'd suck that too, even if Immortality wasn't on the table.

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>>10486211
>>10486213
>>10486279
>>10486326
>>10486330
>>10486405
>>10486432
Well the knowledge is gained I suppose.

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(SO, I'm dropping this character thing. Poorly/not at all thought out spurr of the moment random thought dealie. Got bored/tired of it like five posts in. Guess I'm just not meant to do anything serious like this really. Didn't really seem like anyone was interested anyways.)

>>10486457
(damnit I wanted to flesh out the war with you)

>>10486457
(Thought he was p cool. Better luck next time? I'm sure you'll write up another nice char.)

>>10486457
(I was interested, IC my character just didn't have a reason to reply.)

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>>10486405
>That "hope" seemed kinda awkward.
h-how?
did i say something wrong...
i didn't mean in a wierd way

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>>10486453
just become a rock

>>10486455
Um.
Are you really Giratina?

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>>10486485
(Sorry mate, if anyone wants to take over that'd be fine. Just sort of realized it was virtually assured to go absolutely nowhere if I even followed through with it.)

>>10486504
>>10486508
(Thanks I guess. Probably just going to resume business as usual: lurking.)

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>>10486567
I want to keep my body though, if I just wanted the easy way I'd go be a banette or whatever, but I'd like to stay human.

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>>10486453
Immortality? I'd do it as long as I wouldn't die trying.
>>10486455
W-whoa...
>>10486587
I'd also like to know, mostly because I'm worried I'm going to get smited.

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>>10486457
(Rip, I thought he was pretty interesting. Good luck with your next character.)
>>10486455
>Morty would reply with some sort of lewd comment if he had thread open right now
>Alas, it is not meant to be
>>10486426
>A gasp comes from Morty at the contact.
>He brings a fist to his mouth and side-eyes Lance
"Yes. Yep. Perfectly fine."

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>>10486603
ooooooooooooh
okay roll with me
you want to become a lich
youll need to have something powerful put your soul into an object
like
a rock
i dunno who can do that though
talk to gigi or uh youknowwho

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>>10486449
"I have a very generous employer, basically. He's been dabbling into the real estate recently"
>A flash can be seen in an adjacent room
"Looks like Probe came back"

>>10486457
(Well, RIP. Please do try again soon, he was interesting)

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>>10486607
>Lance gives a shrug, leaning back on Morty.
"You don't get scared easily, do you?"

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>>10486453
Immortality? That's a pretty big goal with challenges to match.
>Sip
Hah.

>>10486559
>Sip
May be just me.

>>10486455
Wait wait, WHAT?

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>>10486718
>Did Lance just initiate cuddles?
>Morty seems to think so, sliding an arm around Lance's waist
"Nope. Don't really get scared anymore. Ghosts feed off of fear."

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>>10486778
i did not mean in a wierd way of course
if you got it in a wierd way that means a said something wierd
if you did it is not what you think

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>>10486658
Will becoming a lich make me rot into a skeleton? Because that's no good either.

>>10486778
That wasn't the worst dick joke I've heard, at least.

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>>10487021
well you have to pick something to put your soul in
natural no superalloys or whatever theyre called
if said thing breaks so does your soul and youre shit out of luck
but you gotta get someone strong to do it
arceus gigi yveltal you know who
your call

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>>10486711
>They look towards the room
"Who is probe?"
>>10486457
(Shame, the character was interesting.)

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>>10486929
>Lance leans back into Morty, chuckling a bit.
"Maybe you should sit in my lap. How does that feel, anyway? Empty?"

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>>10487107
"My Porygon2, he was away checking on some very important servers."

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>>10487080
You didn't answer the question and if I'm getting Arceus to make me into a lich I can ask for a better version of immortality anyways.
Speaking of which, I'm thinking of going to try and find Xerneas in Kalos next.

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whens emmerich gonna make this fucking nightmare

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>>10487107
>Various and long seconds later, Probe has finished warping in,
>First thing he notices is the newcomer Sylveon
>He proceeds to float on towards the Fairy type, watching inquisitively

>>10487241
The real questiong is, where do I put the bepis in?

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>>10487110
"... okay."
>The gym leader moves and plops himself onto Lance's lap, streching and shifting until comfortable
>It's a good thing Morty is practically shameless, otherwise he'd be flustered as fuck right now
>At least you have a nice view
"Not feeling fear? It's like when you read about something dangerous - you know it's deadly and dangerous, but it doesn't bother you."

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>>10487195
"Ahh okay. so what do you do when you're not working? Just laze around this nice place?"
>>10487252
>The Sylveon smiles at the pory and gives a wave with a ribbon
"Hello there I hear you've been hard at work. "

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>>10487310
>Lance runs a hand through Morty's hair.
"Does it now? Hm, maybe I'll let you help tame my Garchomp army when it comes to fruition."

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>>10487021
Heh.

>>10486947
Not really weird, just that something is hidden.

>>10487326
"That, plus coffee and some training once in a while with MAG over there"
"Haven't had much luck with that"

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>>10487326
>Probe is now up close
>Many seconds of staring after...
>Vocalizer: On
"Scanning complete"
"Hello unnamed Sylveon. our current work is very important to the owner of the servers"

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>>10487486
l-l-like what?

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>>10487445
>Morty closes his eyes and leans into the touch
>Are either of them actually watching the movie?
"Hmm? Army? What for?"

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>>10487486
"Mm hadn't had any coffee since I last managed to steal a lick from my old trainer's cup, burned my tongue on it but it was an interesting experience. So why do you think you don't have much luck with your training"
>>10487549
"Unnamed? Oh right my name is Sylvie! I don't think I've ever seen a porygon in real life let alone meet one."

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>>10487633
>The hand runs through the hair again, Lance pausing to turn small groups curly.
>A small sigh comes from the dragon trainer.
"Oh for our eventual overthrowing of Sinjoh. I'm picking Garchomp so Surge can lose face when fifty or so pokemon under his control faint at once."

>>10487633
>33
>Sweat
>Did you know that Morty's hair is really sensitive?
>Well, you do now - a moan accidentally slips through.
>It's a light sound, easy to mistake for a gasp if you aren't paying attention

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>>10487717
>Auto update is a bitch
>Just pretend that >>10487721 is part of this post
"You're trusting Surge with dragons?"

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>>10487628
It kinda did sound like you wanted the exact opposite.

>>10487667
"If you want some coffee, just ask. Kind of expected from a Kalosian pokemon"
"Not enough battlers in the area, wild pokemon too low leveled... or maybe I'm expecting too much from MAG there. Just novice trainer things"
"And oh yeah, Probe scans every pokemon that gets up close for a reasonable amount of time"
>Pet the fairypupper

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>>10487721
>Lance quirks an eyebrow.
>>10487760
>Lance is now trying to braid Morty's hair.
>It's only going to look decent if he gets something dubs or above.
"I'm trusting Surge to fail and lose face. I think Sinjoh would work better as a reserve of sorts, honestly. Cynthia has a point."

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>>10487667
"Report amended, thank you for your cooperation Sylvie"
>Scan result sent to the nerd's dex
>The most important thing in there being Sylvie's level
"Data suggests my species is uncommon outside of certain scientific and technological areas."

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>>10487894
no!
i didn't mean the oposite, i would die of shame if that ever happened, i would be even more embarrased about myself than i already do

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>>10487921
"Hmm, I mean more..."
>He squirms a bit in Lance's lap, breaths slow and deep as he tries hard to control his breathing
"He's gonna get eaten alive. Shark week, featuring Surge."

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>>10488135
>Lance chuckles.
"It's a joke. Fifty Garchomps would put me out of a house if I had to feed that many. I'm sure he can handle Sinjoh alone if the vote goes through. What are you going to vote?"
>Lance undoes the braids, trying again.

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>>10488216
"I'll see what the cards and the bones say. For now I don't know."
>Well, we know Lance sucks at braids.
>At least his hands feel nice running through Morty's hair - the gym leader is practically putty.

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>>10487894
"I appreciate the offer and I'm sure I'll take you up on it."
>The petting causes the fairy's tail to wag and a ribbon lightly coils around the petting hand's wrist and forearm
"Keep that up and you may never get rid of me."
>>10487990
>The scan will show they're level 46
"Ah yeah that's right you guys mostly help humans with computers and whatnot."

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>>10488399
"Are you going to d a divination right now? Please don't ruin my fireplace."
>Lance chuckles, undoing the braids and giving it one last try.

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>>10488399
>>10488523
>99
>Morty is really having a hard time with self control right now
>A breathy gasp comes from the gym leader, who leans his head back into Lance's hands
>The movement may have messed up the braid, but he doesn't care right now
"No, it's... They're ah... At home. The cards."

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>>10488074
Oh, okay.
Good luck with your ghost catching.

>>10488501
"After all, the coffee maker needs to be ready almost the entire day"
>Left hand getting coiled up
"A nerd with a Fairy type? Unheard of."
"....not like I mind"
>Keep up the pets

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>>10488501
"Server maintenance, network defense, testing of new hardware, I have many duties"

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>>10488656
>A hand moves down from his hair to rub at his face, brushing against his cheek.
"Are you well, Morty?"

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>>10488742
Thank you
Tomorrow when i get out of work i'll go look around for a ghost type to add on my team
Anyway i am going to hit the bed for today have a good evening for you

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>>10488742
>the tail wagging intensifies and that ribbon sure doesn't want you to stop
"First for everything..."

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>>10488790
>His cheeks are bright red and warm to the touch
>Time to bluff about being turned on while nude, this'll certainly go well
" 'm fine. Perfectly fine. Nice movie."

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>>10489055
>Lance chuckles, pulling Morty into a hug, the arm now on his chest.
"You like it? What's the ghost's name again, Morty?"

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>>10489123
>Morty leans back and into the hug, resting his head against Lance's shoulder.
>He's clearly confused, trying his hardest to recall the ghost's name
"The Onryo had a name...?"

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>>10488830
Good night.

>>10488992
"Stranger things happen. Hope you are comfortable around Steel types if you stick around."
>Left hand just a few more coils before getting its wrist wrapped
>Do not stop the pets
"I heard Sylveon are really affectionate but this is something"

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>>10489178
>Lance chuckles, nodding.
"She did. And it was-"
>Lance cuts himself off, smiling.
"What if we got her on Surge? Seven daaaaaays."

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>>10489244
>44
>The petting is so good the tail is almost a blur and another ribbon joins the coiling party
"Hehe yeah we can be though I can stop if its bothering you and as far as steel types are concerned I'm fine with them so long as they're not attacking me."

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>>10489301
"... you have the tape?"
>His brows shoot up in surprise, Morty giving his chest a playful prod
"Didn't expect you to be the cursing type."

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>>10489411
>Lance recieves a poke in the nipple.
"Well, I don't..."
>He creeps a hand up Morty's bare chest.
"Perhaps we can curse him another way?"
>When his hand reaches Morty's left nip he gives it a gentle pinch.

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>>10489344
>44
>Sylveon happiness magic in full effect
>SIPP
"Not bothering me at all actually. Not at al,, this feels goodl"
"I'm looking to expand my team with all I mean mostly Steel and Electric types"
>Meanwhile, Probe is still watching and analyzing

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>>10489570
"Feels good huh? Dunno if I've had anybody ever say that about getting their hand coiled with a ribbon."

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>>10489547
"Curses? I know plenty, just..."
>Morty's next words are forgotten, cut off by a sharp breath and a hiss, arcing his chest up into the touch.
"Shit"

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>>10489721
>Lance quirks an eyebrow.
"I don't think turning Surge into that is a good idea."
>Lance chuckles, hugging the stoner again.

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>>10489716
"I assure you, this is completely new to me as well"
>Pets continue, focusing in the back
>That tail could best a Cinccino at dusting off things, by how fast it is wagging

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>>10489793
>It takes him a bit to catch up to what Lance means, eyebrows twitching in confusion
"Can't turn Surge into something he already is."
>He reaches back, looping his arms around Lance's neck.
>His breathing is uneven, coming out in quick, hot puffs against Lance's jaw
"What kinda curse do you need?"

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>>10489810
>The Sylveon murrs as the pet assault continues
"Well if your hand feels good from it then how about this"
>A ribbon drapes over his neck rather than wrap like the hand to avoid scaring the nerd and happy funtime fairy magic a-go

Where would I find subject: Sun?

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>>10490022
Um... Do you mean me or uh...
The actual sun?

>>10490038
I am looking for strong warriors to test my limits on. I assume you are #7: Sun?

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>>10489895
>Lance chuckles, leaning into Morty's hair.
"Mmmm.... What about something that makes him fall over? Or... Something to make him sneeze when he uses the word training. Mmm?"

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>>10490050
#7...? I don't know about that part, but I'm Sun, the champion of Alola!
So um.... unless there's another strong person around named Sun it's probably me you're looking for!!

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>>10490021
>Nerd: not scared, just a bit confused
>And then unexplained happiness, just enough to push a few thoughts of concern into the back of his mind
>Lean in closer
"It's almost like you have never been petted before."

>>10490087
It is a linear list. #7B is Moon. #1 is Red.
In technicality the list should be changed to include- This does not apply to the mission.
Where can I battle you?

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>>10490118
>The Sylveon chuckles inbetween their own noises of happiness or rather what could be interpreted as a chuckle
"Oh I have it's just been a long time. Did you enjoy that though?"

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>>10490085
"You want him to lose face, right? Balls and ass get a severe itch every time he says League."
>Today Morty's hair smells strongly of lavender and woodsmoke.
>The gym leader runs his hands through the hair that he can reach, digging his nails lightly into the scalp.

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>>10490133
Oh... I think I get it!
Anyway um...
I'm in an apartment in Hau'Oli since um...
Yeah!
I can go outside whenever you show up!

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>>10490211
>Dubfail.
>Too deep.
"Ow. You're about as gentle as a Druddigon."
>Lance chuckles.
"That sounds good to me, are we going to your place...?"

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>>10490159
"The contact? Actually, yes. You could say that is for the same reasons"
"When was your last time?"

>>10490233
Ground to cover, mission to be fulfilled. I will see you soon.
>Rolling for travel time with last number.

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>>10490322
Alright!
I'll see you then!

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>>10490313
"Been 5 years since I last had a petting session like this though if you meant general affectionate contact it's been about 2 now."

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>>10490301
"Hm? You don't like it?"
>He lightens up, running his fingertips along the skin instead
"Sure. Hope you don't mind teleportation."
>Removing his hands from Lance's hair, Morty gets up. A moment is spent stretch before he walks over to wear he left his clothing, removing Gengar's Pokeball and releasing the Pokemon
>Morty walks back over to Lance, resting his hand on the champion's shoulder and snapping a his fingers
>Rollin' for Shadow Sneak time

>>10490475
(*a moment is spent stretching)
(*were he left his clothing)
(Fug, proofreading is important)

>>10490490
(*Where)
(Fuckin fuck, typo'd on a god damn correction post)
(GJ me)

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>>10490345
>There's definitely something outside your apartment now.
>And it's accosting your neighbors.
"Where is #7?"

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>>10490444
>444
>Nerd status: particularly commoved
"Five years, that's a long time."
"I guess something related to your old trainer?"
>Do not stop with the pets

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>>10490529
>Sun rushes down the stairs, arriving outside in about five minutes
>He waves to attach the robot's attention
"Hi!! You were looking for me, right?"

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>>10490575
"Yes, you. I am to battle you, let's hurry this up."
>The tail whips around in the air.
>Fuck I was gonna set up a custom build but, uh, I'm not sure if that's cool with PAR.
>How's a LV 80 Magnezone sound for now?
>No items, etc.

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>>10490574
"Mmm yes he was apparently unaware that doting on your eevee led to getting a Sylveon and was most unhappy when it happened so from then on ceased most affection. Eventually he got another Eevee and I felt I had been replaced so I destroyed my ball and left in the middle of the night."

>>10490627
(I'm fine with it, sounds like it'd be pretty rad so long as it weren't abused)

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>>10490646
"Damn. DAMN. Harsh, lets not think about him again."
"It's getting late."

>>10490627
(Sounds good to me, yeah. Feel free to give it a custom moveset as long it is not too OP)
(This is not the first time this happened, after all)

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>>10490627
"Alright! I'll start with... Sol!"
>Moments later a Solrock floats between the two
>Solrock would be faster so...
>Sol used Will-O-Wisp!
>Need to roll below 8 for it to hit, burned status reduces Attack by half
>I don't mind custom builds, maybe just run the build through thread first?
>We'd probably cap custom builds at 600 BST to keep things fair

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>>10490683
"Ah right you probably have work tomorrow. I can sleep here on the couch unless you have a preferable spot for me?"

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>>10490475
>>10490490
>>10490509
>Shadow Sneak successful.
"Well, you've got a nice place, at least."
>Lance shakes his head a bit, slightly disoriented.

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>>10490665
>>10490683
>>10490717
(I plan to post it here or run it through Jirachi and Skitts. Not literally run them through, humorous, I know.)
(I was thinking primarily attacker.)

>>10490717
"Interesting start."
>Did I already fuck it, burn doesn't do anything to special attackers, right?
>Time for Flash Cannon.
252+ SpA Magnezone Flash Cannon vs. 252 HP / 0 SpD Solrock: 266-314 (69.2 - 81.7%) -- guaranteed 2HKO after Leftovers recovery

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>>10490737
>Morty eyes Lance, resting a hand on his shoulder
"Hey, you alright? Need to rest it off or something? My bed's open."

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>>10490727
"Yeah, Thomas Street 33 if you want to pay me a visit there"
"I will leave the door unlocked, just don't forget to close it after ways if you feel like going out."
"Yeah the couch is great already..."
>Thinking for various seconds
"...the bed is even better.

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>>10490803
(If you post it here Jiji and I will still be able to give critique. Might be best to run it through thread for extra opinions.)
>You're fine, burn only affects physical attackers.
>Showdown should have an option to add "burned" as your status under the status tab
"Special Attacker? Alright... Sol? Rock Slide!"
>Misses on 9
>4 Atk Solrock Rock Slide vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Magnezone: 43-51 (19 - 22.5%) -- 86.1% chance to 4HKO after burn damage
>I'll calc the burn damage as happening on every one of your turns, so you'd be at... 71% hp right now, unless Rock Slide crits or misses

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>>10490988
"Hmm did you have a spare bed or do you mean yours?"

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>>10491014
(Gotcha, gotcha. )
>The robot lurches from the attack.
"How quaint. Again."
>A beam comes from the mouth.252+ SpA Magnezone Flash Cannon vs. 252 HP / 0 SpD Solrock: 266-314 (69.2 - 81.7%) -- guaranteed 2HKO after Leftovers recovery

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>>10491140
>Solrock is down
"Whoops, there goes Sol! He's not too good against Special Attackers. Helios!"
>Out goes the Volcarona
"Quiver Dance!"
>+1 to Sp Atk, Sp Def, Speed

>>10491031
"...I haven't tried any other bed"
>Nerd stands up, going towards the main bedroom
"Feel free to come in"
>And then he stops, he just remembered something
"Forgot to say, you can call me Stibium"

>The Nerd, that needs to make more images

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>>10490861
"Yes, I'd like to get some rest. Feel free to come for some cuddles."
>Redheadmcdragonman: Go get some zs.

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>>10491204
>The fairy hops down onto the floor and follows Stibium to his bedroom

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>>10491223
>Curse Surge or cuddle up to Lance...
>That's a tough decision...
>It takes Morty ten seconds to make a decision and follow Lance

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>>10491195
"An enemy I am unprepared for. Rock move needed."
>The tail grabs the chainsaw, cutting a chunk from the road, flicking the saw back into place.
>The tail grabs the chunk, hurling it at the Volcarona.
>For fairness sake of an improvised move I'll bump the accuracy down to 70%.
0- Atk burned Magnezone Rock Throw vs. 0 HP / 0 Def Charti Berry Volcarona: 22-27 (7 - 8.6%) -- possibly the worst move ever

>>10491241
>The bedroom is fairly similar to the rest of the place
>Includes a bed way too big for a single person
>The enrd disappeared into an adjacent bathroom

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>>10491331
>They hop on the bed and walk around it looking for the best spot which given the lavishness of the bed anywhere would be great
>Eventually the fairy picks a spot and curls up and waits while watching the bathroom door for the nice human to return

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>>10491313
>Oh, that calc is the Charti Berry build
>The moth chitters, quickly scarfing down the berry it was holding.
"... that's one way to do it! You kinda need some sorta protection from Fire moves... Like Flash Fire! Otherwise.... Helios!"
>Not sure if you want the Electric typing as well, so I won't use HP Ground for now
>+1 252 SpA Volcarona Fiery Dance vs. 0 HP / 0 SpD Magnezone: 548-648 (242.4 - 286.7%) -- guaranteed OHKO

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>>10491408
"Flash-"
>The fire attack hits hard, shutting the robot down.
>A moment passes before the red hot plating flips up, expelling steam as it rights itself.
"Insufficient data. What makes you different from me? Explain."

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>>10491458
"Um.. I'm not a robot? Unless you mean the battle, in which case um... I used Sol to kinda get a general idea how to beat you! Rock Slide didn't do much damage and your Flash Cannon dealt quite a bit of damage so... I figured you were probably a Steel Type with a bias for Special Attacks, and Helios counters those pretty good!"
>Sun shuffles awkwardly, nudging a rock back and forth with his toe
"So I guess um... Our tactics?"

>>10491404
>A few minutes later, the nerd emerges from the bedroom, only wearing boxers
>He quickly goes under the sheets
"It was... getting cold. Sleep well, Sylvie"
>There are a Porygon2 and a Magnemite watching from the door
>They will eventually go to rest in the bed as well

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>>10491510
"Tactics? I am programmed to process thousands of inputs and come up with the most sound decision."
>The robot goes silent for a few moments before resuming.
"I must return home. The data you have given me is very interesting. I will be back soon after going to another area."
>And it's off toward the docks.

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>>10491518
>The sylveon lets out a giggle that is interrupted with a yawn and pats Sitbium with a ribbon before closing their eyes and eventually falls asleep

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>>10491553
"Bye dogbot!"
>The champion waves goodbye to the robot before returning to his hotel, flopping on the bed with an "oof"

>>10491563
>This feels nice
>Nerd status: sleep

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bump that thread like shingo bumps cars

piss

BING BING WAHOO

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>Surge's gym has been open for the past two hours or so
>Thank god he didn't get cursed yet
>He's been going easy on trainers, but they're still mostly garbage
>One kid even brought a mono-water team against him, and there wasn't even a mudkip-line pokemon on the team!
I think I am seeing more of the negative effects of the Trainer Job Requirements Act.
This is not something I am enjoying.

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>>10494758
Surge
Surge
I have something important to tell you

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>>10495076
Go right ahead, assuming it's something that can be said in public.

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>>10495146
Surge
It's called Sinjoh
Because it's between Sinnoh and Johto

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>>10495163
Yes, and?
I knew this already.

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>>10495271
Suuuuuurge
Sometime in the next three to four days
Your ass is going to get completely destroyed

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>>10495417
I will keep that in mind and protect myself accordingly, thank you.

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good afternoon everyone
how is everyone doing on this fine day?

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>>10495990
It's not the sexual kind of destroy
By the way
>>10496003
Good, good
Trying to find the Cayenne pepper

>>10495990
>An angry-looking lady with too much makeup storms into the Gym, a purse full of Pokeballs in hand.
Finally! I'm here to get a Thunder Badge~.
>She sounds saccharine as she tries to put on a cheery face.

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>>10496365
Understood.

>>10496982
>Surge tucks his dex away, looking at the woman from behind his force field.
>Between them lies a field of 15 trash cans and three trainers.
>The adviser dude tells her that there's two switches hidden in the trash, and if she wants to challenge Surge, she has to flick them both on.

>>10497086
>She gives him an evil look.
"W-WHAT!? You really expect me to dig through the TRASH? I'm not going to ruin my manicure for this... Hm. I have an idea."
>She sends out a rough-looking Sandshrew.
"Get digging, girl, there's a switch in some of these cans. Chop chop."
>The Sandshrew looks back, confused and a little scared-looking.

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>>10497215
>Surge frowns a bit, and one of the trainers challenges her as soon as the pokemon is out, preventing her from digging through the trash

>>10497318
>She reacts very negatively to this.
"W-What the hell? Sandslash, use Rollout!"
>The Sandslash looks around, jittery, before complying.
>Dubsfail, the 'Slash rolls out away from everybody instead of listening.

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>>10497381
>The trainer had yet to send out a pokemon
>The other two trainers rush in to restrain her and force her to recall her sandslash
>Surge's jaw drops at the stupidity he's witnessing

>>10496003
Energized with some coffee.

>>10497422
>She recalls the Sandslash, complaining all the while about the Gym staff being too touchy and jumpy.
"So, does that mean I won? Oh, waaaait, the switches. Oopsie~!"
>She sends out a battered-looking Eevee with an obnoxiously sized bow on it and a Magnemite in need of a good polishing to continue Switch Hunt 2017 for her.
"Alright, Zapper, go get the switches! Go on! You too, Coco, move it!"
>She then physically plops the Eevee into one of the trash cans to dig.

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>>10496365
well good luck with that
>>10497430
that's good
i hope you have a good day

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>>10497430
Good to hear. I pulled two extended shifts this weekend, but I've got today off and the overtime was worth it. Saw some fairly crazy stuff on the job, albeit not as much as I expected.

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Are there any good deserts or beaches in Hoenn?
Apparently there's a desert nearby according to this PDA thing but it looks a little bit small.

>>10496003
I woke up on a bed for the first time and years and it took me a minute to remember where I was.

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>>10497648
I heard that most of Hoenn is beach, but I can't confirm anything.

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>>10497519
>Sorry, I didn't know how to respond to this for a while
>When I said restrained I meant it, she's being arrested for assault with a pokemon.

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Sinjoh: "Arceus City" reached. Study Subject: Yet to be found.
>Vocalizer: 160%
>The robot's sound system crackles as it speaks.
"Where is Quincy?"

>>10498195
>It's cool. Her level of dumb is a bit hard to respond to sometimes.
>She scream that she has no idea what's going on, that she thought she was just doing the challenge, et cetera, on her way out the door.
>Her Magnemite whirrs and clicks, watching her leave with universally recognizable relief. Her other Pokemon reluctantly follow.

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>>10498120
Oh, ok then.
Well clearly that's not completely true because it's really foresty near me.
There's this weird old temple thing and a massive human city nearby, but no beaches.
At least none that I can see.
I guess I'll go look around this desert for a bit, maybe make a sandcastle or something.
>Sandslash sets off towards Route 111, rollin' for travel time