I'm an atheist, in the market for new God or Goddess, both

I have bad news for you Anon. Once humans wants to ask the Truth to The Most High. This desire brings them into Heaven and into conflict with Angels who deemed our curiosities as heresy.

The angels lost.

And what we find is an empty Throne.

The angels are so butthurt that now they sentenced all human souls to fire of hells.

Only the Inheritor of Creator's Legacy is now the legitimate successor that can safe you from Hell. This new Gods will carve a new Heaven. From the corpse of Hell itself if that what it takes.

>>55202368
Stick with atheism. It frees up your weekends.

Either that, or worship Flying Spaghetti Monster so you can claim every friday as a religious holiday. Also heaven has a beer volcano and a stripper factory.

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>>55202368
>I'm an atheist, in the market for new God or Goddess, both fictional and real, from merciful to vindicative, I'm willing to give a chance to any diety. Why is your god better than the others and why should I become a follower of your faith?

Pro-tip: you don't have to pick a god to get all the bennies.

>>55203266
How recognised is that?

>>55202368
>>>/x/

>>55202368
Kabbalah is a wonderful religion that mixes the fun part of Judaism with magic.

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>>55202368
Because my faith doesn't require you to adhere to arbitrary religious rituals and does not offer you any punishment or reward. You are free to practice it however you want.
Are you aware of the concept of "the guardian angel"? It's pretty much that, except instead of guardian angels there are personal gods for every individual and no single "main" god or pantheon.

>>55202368
>I'm an atheist
Stopped right there. This is b8

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Four for the price of one soul.

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>>55202368
What's your standard for better? You thought about eternity for twenty minutes and think you've come to some interesting conclusions? Well let me tell you something. I stand with two thousand years of darkness and bafflement and hunger behind me! My kind has harvested the souls of millions of peasants! And I couldn't give a haply jizz about your internet assembled philosophy!

>>55202368
OP I'm not sure how to put this, but we sorta slaughter apostates on sight.

>>55203266
>Stick with atheism. It frees up your weekends
>ke-ke-ke-kekshot!

>>55203266
yeah, but christian televangelists make mad dosh

>>55203928
>the fun part of Judaism
literally wat