How would Conan fare one-on-one against some of the best

>>54542621
I haven't heard of any Westerosi that would be a match for Conan. The fact that you didn't advance a definite candidate gives the impression that you don't have much confidence in them either. If you're looking for epic fantasy match-ups, the old standard is John Carter vs. Conan.

>>54542663
How about Elric with Stormbringer versus Conan?

Conan would win, because my dislike of GoT empowers him.

>>54542621
I'm fairly sure Conan all by himself can defeat an entire Khalasar

>>54542621
It'd be a total slaughter. Conan would rule the place inside of a week. And he'd be a damn good king, too, not the least of which because as soon as someone said "zombie army coming from the north", he'd say "I am officially done with allowing you petty barons to fight one another. All of our armies are going north NOW to kill the zombies. Anyone who doesn't like it can fight me."

Only it'd be a bit more purple prose-y and better sounding.

>>54542752
So basically he'd be John Snow but better in every way?

>>54542897
Probably? I don't know much about Game of Thrones. All I know is that Conan in Westeros means Conan joining the army of whoever's currently sitting on the Iron Throne, making friendly with all the troops and getting him to like them, then turning that army against whoever's currently on the Iron Throne and personally leading the troops to seize it himself, slaughtering anyone who gets in his way.

TWICE he did something like that in a Howard Conan story that I've read. If Conan is in your army, just make him your King right off the bat. It's faster and much less painful.

>>54542621
Westerosi fight in full plate, Conan at best wears Iron Age chain. He'd be a savage fighter and he'd probably kill plenty of knights, but I doubt he'd last against like the Mountain or other big, strong armored opponents. Though didn't Hyborea have a realm of medieval style knights alongside the not!Rome and not!Egypt? So, maybe he'd be fine?

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>>54542621
well, jaime is generally considered the best, and I just don't think he'd beat conan

Here's his stats, according to gary gygax himself. In case you didn't know it, conan is a huge gary-stu, but people don't care because he's been around forever. It's kinda the point of his stories, too.

That said, I'd give two-hands Jaime and a cool-headed Oberyn the best chances. Both of them together could do it, I bet. Why not Gregor? Because Conan regularly beats massively huge and strong enemies like it's nothing.

>>54542975
Dude, Conan would decimate the Mountain in one blow, he's Gatsu levels of brutal.

Has Conan ever killed a dragon or something else similarly large? Because if he has, then chewing apart knights should be no problem at all.

>>54543055
I read a story where him and some archer princess fight one. I don't remember how it went, but I do remember the chick shooting arrows at its eyes and the arrows bounced off, so I'm guessing Conan finished the fight.

>>54542975
Protip: Conan isn't stupid. He's ran away from fights that he didn't think he could win, and isn't above using underhanded tricks. He's not going to attempt to fight an entire army by himself if he can do what this anon said >>54542972

>>54542621
The most impressive fighter in aSoIaF was Strong Belwas, an undefeated pit champion who allows every opponent to cut him once before killing him, which implies a very high level of skill (and, because he is covered in scars, a lot of experience). He survives eating a bowl of poisoned locusts, and is extremely large and strong. He's not actually from Westeros but it fits the spirit of your question.

There are other people we could talk about, but nobody has any feats to suggest they are better than Belwas (then again, we rarely see them fight).

Still, Conan supposedly broke the neck of a wild bull before he was a grown man, in addition to being extremely cunning and having enormous skill and experience as a fighter. So at minimum he's like Belwas on steroids. I don't see anyone else standing a chance.

basically this >>54542998 and this >>54542663
Conan is essentially the best in everything while remaining conceivably human.
He needs another pulp-hero level character to properly challenge him.

Reminder that Conan once strangled a dude bigger than him while said dude was trying to strangle him.

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>>54543055

>>54543095
The Mountain was the most physically impressive specimen in Westeros, even he got beaten by a ninja flipping faggot with a pointy stick.

>>54543137
Baal-pteor the Strangler m8
>I think you never saw a man from the West before. Did you deem yourself strong, because you were able to twist the heads off civilized folk, poor weaklings with muscles like rotten string? Hell! Break the neck of a wild Cimmerian bull before you call yourself strong. I did that, before I was a full-grown man — like this!

>>54542687
That would be a very interesting fight, actually.
Conan can soak up massive amounts of damage and still kick ass
But
Elric gets stronger the more damage he inflicts... at least to a certain degree.

I'd still have to go with Conan

Some of the best I know are Breeane of Tarth, Clegane, Jamie, and the Mountain.

The thing about Conan (and Red Sonja, actually) people tend to forget is that he's not JUST strong. He's also fast and quit witted. He's a very intelligent individual, just not book learned.

Breane and Clegane fight in very similar manners. They're well trained, quick, and strong. Clegane is more brutal, but both of them would get overwhelmed by Conan's sheer strength. He's comparable to the Mountain.

Jamie would be his toughest fight, since they're both intelligent fighters. Jamie is probably faster, Conan is definitely stronger, but Conan is also dirtier. Once he realized that, he'd fight dirty and mean and get the upper hand.

Against the Mountain, his speed would mean he'd dance around the Mountain's clumsy strikes. They could match each other in strength, but Conan's skill and speed would easily win him the day.

>>54543201
>Elric
How have I not heard of this guy yet? I have new books to read now!

>>54543244
Because it's shit mate.
Elric can best be described as
>Incompetent man-child albino fucks everything up forever and dies alone and unmourned
If you like that kind of thing, more power to you I guess.

>>54543244
No, he's Sasuke levels of bad

>>54542975
Yeah, the realm is called Aquilonia, which borders his homeland of Cimmeria, so he's fully aware of the knights and plate and everything. Hell, he took part in a raid to destroy an Aquilonian colony-city, Venerium, when he was about 14.

Conan eventually became King of Aquilonia, incidentally.

>>54543055
>Has Conan ever killed a dragon or something else similarly large?

In Howard's original stories? Yup, with poison and an improvised spear, in "Red Nails", the last Conan story written by Howard.

>>54543137
While shit-talking the guy's strangling abilities, too...like, it wasn't just that he out-strangled the guy, he actually mocked the guy's attempts AND sang the praises of his own ability to strangle.

>Conan's low laugh was merciless as the ring of steel.

>"You fool!" he all but whispered. "I think you never saw a man from the West before. Did you deem yourself strong, because you were able to twist the heads off civilized folk, poor weaklings with muscles like rotten string? Hell! Break the neck of a wild Cimmerian bull before you call yourself strong. I did that, before I was a full-grown man—like this!"

>And with a savage wrench he twisted Baal-pteor's head around until the ghastly face leered over the left shoulder, and the vertebrae snapped like a rotten branch.

>>54543259
>>54543267
He's a bit like Conan in this regard: he gets a free pass at a lot of shit simply because he was just about the first to bring them up.

His stories aren't as bad as people say, anyway. I've read through them fine. Give a few a go, see how you swallow them.

>>54543267
>>54543259
God dammit. I need some fantasy to read then. Already read all of Conan, Gerald Terrant, and some other stuff. I just need a lengthy series of dark high fantasy mate. I'm bored.

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>>54543289
You could give Corum a shot. It's by the same author than Elric but a great deal better read.

>>54543055
I know he once fought and killed something heavily implied to be a star-spawn from the Cthulhu mythos.

>>54542621
Aragorn would be one of the only who could.win against conan.

>>54543289
Fritz Leiber senpai.
You will never enjoy anything as much as Fafhrd and Grey Mouser.
They're amazing.
They are literally the best.
Either that or Solomon Kane, Howards other works are pretty baller as well.

>>54543312
Yeah, I recall that also. I believe in a non-Howard book he killed some necromancer fucks that were fighting to release/destroy the Cthulhu baby.

>>54543324
>Solomon Kane
A friend of mine recommended watching the movie, but I never knew it was a book series. Neat.

>>54543274
Yeah, but a few sentences later Conan admits that Baal-Pteor almost strangled him.
He talks a big game--because fuck Baal-Pteor and his nonsense boasting before the struggle--but Conan almost dies in the fight.

>Conan hurled the flopping corpse to the floor, turned to the sword again, and gripped the hilt with both hands, bracing his feet against the floor. Blood trickled down his broad breast from the wounds Baal-pteor's finger nails had torn in the skin of his neck. His black hair was damp, sweat ran down his face, and his chest heaved. For all his vocal scorn of Baal-pteor's strength, he had almost met his match in the inhuman Kosalan.

>>54543346
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BXd7nuJkPQ
Enjoy.
This poem basically sums up his greatest adventures.
And yes, they're all Conan tier of good.

Also, Kull is great, Bran Mak Morn. Have a nose around for Howards other stuff.
If you like bullshit entertainment Becken Elridge is great.

>>54543368
Shit. Trying to find any books on the dude. Libgen brings up nothing. Guess I'll hit up the pdf thread. I'm intrigued.

>>54543382
Got your back senpai
http://gutenberg.net.au/ebooks13/1303881h.html

>>54543312
Heavily implied nothing, it IS a star-spawn. Lovecraft and Howard snuck references to each other's works into their stories all the time. They were real-life friends.

>>54543395
Oh shit, it's out of copywrite? Neato. I completely forgot gutenberg existed for some reason. THank you.

>>54543399
They also disagreed on the place of the barbarian as a bringer or ruiner of civilization. Interesting letters between those two.

>>54543289
Try Solomon Kane

>>54543201
If I remember right Strombringer kills the moment it inflicts any kind of wound, even small cuts. As long as it draws blood it sucks the soul. Not to mention it can sheer through most nonmagical armour.
Elric also has some extremely powerful spells. If hes able to get any kind of opening to cast he'd be able to conjure up something very nasty.

Conan would be smart enough to recognise the sorcerous threat of Elric and his sword. It's close but if Conan does his thing and fights extremely aggressively he'd have a decent chance of winning. But if Elric get prep-time or a chance to flee and cast a spell than Conan will be in some extreme danger.
As kick-ass as Conan is, he usually needs help in overcoming powerful sorcery.

>>54543430
Already on it senpai.

>>54543176
The Mountain was also functionally retarded.

>>54543399
I think the single greatest moment in literature has to be that time Lovecraft, Howard and a few other authors did a round robin short story
Lovecraft did a chapter about the character getting abducted and turned into an abomination by aliens from beyond the stars and oh god isn't it terrible.
Then Howard took over for the next chapter
3 lines in the character has decided his new body is rad as fuck since what's in a form, got himself a high tech alien gun and been told to go and kick shit on the moons of Zardon or some bollocks and the other authors just fucking ran with it.
10/10.

>>54542972
He also got crucified once for doing that same thing. Granted he did get rescued by a warlord and joined his army, only to become friendly with his men and eventually lead them to overthrow the warlord.

>>54543431
>As kick-ass as Conan is, he usually needs help in overcoming powerful sorcery.
Whereas I definitely agree with you, what most folks forget is that Conan is also a master of underhanded tricks, and stealth as well.
I don't think Conan would hesitate one minute in assassinating elric

>>54543244

Contra these guys (>>54543259 and >>54543267) the Elric books rule. The stories just keep spiraling into new levels of insanity. Elric isn't deep, but he's tragic enough not to be despicable, and he tries to fight against his ancient evil race's inheritance. But the star is really the universe building. There are so many bizarre nations, wizards, magics, destinies, demons, gods, and planes of reality swirling around. I find it an imaginative tour de force to read.

This guy (>>54543308) is right that Corum is better, and the Hawkmoon History of the Runestaff books are better than Conan too. They both fall into the same all-but-psychadelic-and-insane multiverse and style though. I love it all.

>>54543460
>Steepe drunkard
>Warlord
That fucker he overthrew was a desert loving, scum drinking, horse fucking steepe nomad. He was surrounded by other steepe niggers.

>>54543510
>better than Conan too
I meant to say "better than Elric" there. My apologies.

>>54543450
Found it:
http://www.hplovecraft.com/writings/texts/fiction/cb.aspx

>He fought down an unreasoning horror. Judged from a cosmic standpoint, why should his metamorphosis horrify him? Life and consciousness were the only realities in the universe. Form was unimportant. His present body was hideous only according to terrestrial standards. Fear and revulsion were drowned in the excitement of titanic adventure.
>What was his former body but a cloak, eventually to be cast off at death anyway? He had no sentimental illusions about the life from which he had been exiled. What had it ever given him save toil, poverty, continual frustration and repression? If this life before him offered no more, at least it offered no less. Intuition told him it offered more—much more.

>>54543561
HA! I can see that snide fuckers shit eating grin as he wrote that down.

>>54543407
Also, check out Fafhrd, serious.
>"Now about Lankhmar. She's been invaded, her walls breached everywhere and desperate fighting is going on in the streets, by a fierce host which out-numbers Lankhamar's inhabitants by fifty to one — and equipped with all modern weapons. Yet you can save the city."
>"How?" demanded Fafhrd.
>Ningauble shrugged. "You're a hero. You should know."
It's literally your D&D game, before D&D was invented

>>54543596
So many recommendations. I drown in literature. Reading SOlomon Kane right now.

>>54543609
Also, seriously Kull is great.
He's like Conan with 20% more naval gazing.
The Shadow Kingdom is the origin of Serpentmen as a concept basically.
And it's amazing.

>>54543627
Drowning. Drowning.

>>54543535
You just saved yourself from proclaiming some serious heresy, mate.

>>54543450
Wasn't HP Lovecraft in the room, too? Like, all the authors involved were? And wasn't Lovecraft laughing his ass off? I seem to remember that.

A few weeks ago there was a thread about (you) getting to play in a game with Gary Gygax as the DM, and play alongside CS Lewis, JRR Tolkien, and Jack Chick. I managed to convince the OP to also include Howard and Lovecraft as fifth and sixth party members.

It was decided that the most likely result is Lewis and Tolkien doing awesome world-building, Gygax and Chick trying to kill each other. The ones who are actually enjoying the game are (you), Howard, and Lovecraft, with the latter two basically having brought beer and chips to the party and their every other line of dialogue being "fuck it, hold my beer, I got this."

I wish Conan wore armor more, I like that Dark Ages sorta look

>>54543651
Fun fact, Conan does wear armor, in like, 90% of his stories.

>>54543518
Everyone is weak compared to Conan. Kinda the point of the books.

>>54543664 >>54543651

>"How did you get away?" he asked presently.

>Conan tapped his mail-shirt and helmet. "If more borderers would wear harness there'd be fewer skulls hanging on the altar-huts."

>>54543274
>Yeah, the realm is called Aquilonia
No it's not it's called Zingara.

>>54543675
Precisely. The Barbarian is exalted in Howard's mythos.

>>54543698
Zingara is more musketeers (sans muskets) and fencing and stuff. But Aquilonia and Nemedia both have knights in plate.

>>54543647
HERESY ALERT: I do like Moorcock's fantasy better than Conan.

>>54543664
Tell that to the artists

>>54543308
Corum also has the benefit of having an absolutely fantastic audiobook production.

>>54544288
And comics by Mike Fucking Mignola.

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>>54544396
nigga say what

>>54542621
He would kill them all, topple all the major kingdoms, get bored and go beat up the lolmongols for being absolutely pathetic excuses for barbarians

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>>54544422
Uh-huh.

>>54542705
This

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>>54544476

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>>54544496

>>54543596

Fafhrd and Grey Mousecatcher cycle is my childhood books. I love them very much. I dont think of them as of pinnacle of literature, obviously, but author did very good work on worldbuiling, made magic look like really magic, bizarre, rare and strange, all these locations and characters, swings between neat drunk hoborobbing and some epic shit, triumvirate of humor, not-over-the-edge-realism\tragedy and vibrantness of plot\pictures. Also action, is nice, the fencing\battle parts are godlike.
>tfw I try to imagine how good would Fritz Leiber be as GM.
>Dick is diamonds, but I was born after his death, so I never stood a chance.

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>>54544515
For the record, to please anons like >>54543324 >>54543596 and >>54544519
(at the off-chance they don't know already), Mignola's done some Fafhrd and the Grey Mauser as well.

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>>54544544

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>>54545176
Oh, missed a page.

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>>54545194

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>>54545217

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>>54545232
And here's the last page of the first chapter. I'd post one, but it's pretty late and I've got an early rise.

>>54545268
Thank you Anon. Have a good night of sleep.

>>54543116
In a Marvel comic he once fucking fought Captain America to a standstill.
Conan is so close to being superhuman that the difference doesn't matter anymore.

>>54543176
Only in the show.
If feels like people always make complaints about shit that DOESN'T happen in the books on here.
In the book Oberyn was far better armed.

>>54543201
Elric's also a sorcerer.
Conan specializes in killing sorcerers.
It's like his racial Favored Enemy or something, with his Favored Terrain being "Towers".

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>>54542621
Young Druss vs Conan

who wins ?

>>54545510
Who the hell is Young Druss?

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>>54543176
Maelys the Monstrous was able to kill a horse with one punch apparently.

>>54545596
Wasn't he also a deformed mutant?

>>54545700
No, it was a normal horse

>>54545404
>the red viper was lightly armored
>greaves, vambrace, gorget, spaulder and steel codpiece
>elsewise oberyn was clad in supple leather and flowing silk
>over his byrnie he worse scales of gleaming copper
>but mail and scale together would not give him a quarter of the protection of gregor's heavy plate
>with its visor removed, the prince's helm was effectively no better than a half-helm, lacking even a nasal
>his round steel shield was brightly polished, and showed the sun-and-spear in red gold, yellow gold, white gold, and copper

>>54544476
stupid hat though

>>54546065
Oberyn was better armed, not armored. There's no plate in Westeros that can survive full strength blows from the Mountain, so being a dark souls ninja flipper is actually the best way to fight him.

Oberyn brought a spear poisoned with manricore venom, even the Mountain's superhuman constitution isn't enough to shrug off one of the most painful and lethal venoms in the world.

Oberyn was a cocky little shit who couldn't bring himself to just gloat from ten feet away, his actual strategy and execution up until the last ten seconds was flawless. Light armor and a poisoned spear was the best choice to fight a behemoth of a man with heavy plate and a giant's reach

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Off the top of my head, Conan had matched an undead mammoth in strength.
his Atlantean sword also weighed about 8 pounds or so and he was fast as well as strong.
The dude would just cleave the other fucker in twain, shield and armor and all.

>>54545420
He typically needs help against the more powerful ones.

On an unrelated note, did anyone else find the character of Conan kind of obnoxious reading Howard's stories? Sure they were entertaining, but it got kind of tiring hearing how his animal strength and sheer barbarian willpower would always overcome the bigger or more skilled guy and save the day.

>>54545529
Druss the Legend, carrier of Snaga.
Also to answer the question of Young Druss vs Conan who wins?
They probably tire each other out, Conan respects Druss for being a bad ass and when he hears why he's running around murdering people (Muh Waifu) he joins him.
Then fucking everything dies.

>>54549264
Best thing to do if you ever feel like that is go re-read Rogues in the house, where Conan our magnificent hero gets caught by the local guards by trying to flee while drunk and runs into a door frame so hard he knocks himself out.

>>54549264
You're not. Really supposed to.read them all in one go. remember they were published in pieces with the larger stories coming out over the course of months and the smaller ones coming out weekly or monthly in pulp magazines across several years.

>>54542975
Conan led full charges of plate clad knights in battle.
He obviously also was plate clad.
And he defeatet charges of other plate clad knights, leading the in the center of a battle line , just show his common troopers how confident he was in them.
Then the enemy routed and he proceeded to smash the still plat clated knights apart in individual battles.
Conan used whatever was available and appropiate.
He also once killed a nigh-hunting giant man-eating killer-ape with nothing more than a loincloth and a dagger in a dark tunnel.
As for the mountain: the other guy already posted the relevant scene from one of his storys.

>>54542975
>Westerosi fight in full plate, Conan at best wears Iron Age chain.
Pretty sure I remember Conan wearing full plate in Hour of the Dragon.

>>54542663
John Carter wouldn't stand a chance. He's only super strong and super durable when he's on Mars, under the light of its yellow sun.

>>54543289
Try the Black Company books. Not classics like the others suggested but I personally love them

>>54543289
>I need some fantasy to read then.
Clark Ashton Smith, Lord Dunsany, Jack Vance, Leigh Brackett, George MacDonald, Eric Rücker Eddison, Edgar Rice Burroughs.

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>>54543289
>dark high fantasy
I've got just the thing.

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>>54545384
>>54545384
Stranded in the 20th Century in a What If? Conan learns english and forms a fiercely loyal gang in a matter of like a month and then robs a museum where he fights Cap
This is their first encounter, after the second Cap realizes Conan isn't a bad guy and offers him a spot on the Avengers but Conan refuses

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>>54549739
He also fought a severely depowered and amnesiac Thor when Thor was accidentally transported to the Hyborian Age
Thor still outpowered him even in a weakened state but you just have to look at the boulder to see how strong Conan is

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>>54549770
I realize I posted the one without the boulder

>>54545268
Where can I read more of this?

>>54549674
He's also seemingly immortal though even before he goes to Mars, because Ned talks about how when he was a child John looked exactly the same as he does now, Carter doesn't appear to age.

>>54545753
(kekked)

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>>54543055
>Has Conan ever killed a dragon or something else similarly large?
He's killed a bunch of great supernatural serpents, and tangled with literal Lovecraftian horrors impervious to normal weapons, including a god made of iron.

Also, when he was crucified, a vulture came down to eat him, so he bit its fucking head off to scare the other vultures and revel in the sheer thrill of killing. That alone puts him above most of the GoT universe, even before the other crazy shit he's done.

>all these people wanking Conan

Don't get me wrong, Conan WOULD own Westeros. but not because he's some fucking superhuman. Because Conan is fucking SMART. And underhanded as fuck. Conan lives by his wits. And generally when he lets his wits leave him, he gets fucked

>>54552070

That along with the fact that Got has gone to shit right now.

>>54542972
He was very loyal while leading the army of Khoraja and didn't even attempt to seize the throne, despite it would have been easy given the realms desolate state.
Well, it surely helped that a beautiful princess was in command at that time.

>>54543116
>Conan is essentially the best in everything while remaining conceivably human.
Does not compute

>>54543201
They fought in a comic and were pretty evenly matched until they realized they were getting played by some sorcerer. They proceed to level the sorcerer's kingdom and part ways, hating each others guts the whole time.

>>54553185
Source? I'd be interested to read this.

>>54553211
It was in an Elric storytime thread on /co/ I'll see if I can dig it up in a bit.

>>54545596
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vcZt8ejQw_8&feature=youtu.be&t=9s

Bobby B. was literally the setting's lowfan Conan analog, and he managed to take the ur-throne of seven kingdoms. Westeros? Shit, Conan would be on his way conquering half of known Planetos before he becomes bored realizing there's no challenge the world can offer.

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>>54543510
>>54543535
Could never agree to that. Elric stills tops the list for me.
>>54543289
Don't listen. Elric is well worth your time. It's a pillar for a reason.
>>54545420
Not exactly. Elric is more of a warlock than a sorcerer. And the wild card is that fucking sword of his. Most broken fucking THING in all of fantasy if you ask me.

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>>54553211
Found it.
https://desuarchive.org/co/thread/91560577/#91562501

>>54553795
I read Moorcock's original elric short stories, they were fucking ASS.

>>54542621
Conan faced off against a giant who strangled Gorillas.
He promptly beat the shit out of him and strangled him to death, after revealing he did the precise same thing to Cimmerian Bulls.

Dayne, Prime Barristan or Jaime might stand a chance and earn his respect, but everyone else is royally fucked against him.

>>54542705
He'd probably BTFO one of their champions, impress the leader enough to sign on, and end up running the outfit. Then he has a great time for a few years, until they get betrayed by sorcery or eaten by a monster, and then it's back to wandering.

>>54549680
Already red them.
>>54549694
Read most of those.
>>54549722
Read the Silmarillion, but not Children of Hurin. It's in my backlog.

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>>54554299
I like em.

>>54542687
The moment Conan sees Elric take a sword fighting stance while oozing magic into the world, Conan grabs some pocket sand and FUCKING BAILS.

Conan isn't fucking stupid. When he's faced with a wizard that's as martially skilled as he, he fucking runs.

>>54542687
Conan dies unless he outsmarts him fast and even then, Stormbringer will just probably materialize in his throat.

>>54556567
Has Conan ever fought a wizard that could also fight?

>>54560096
Wizards can't fight, they're nerds

>>54543324
Seconding this. Read some Elric recently and Moorcock in the afterword mentions Leiber as his favourite sword and sorcery author. I've been tearing through Fafhrd and Grey Mouser ever since. Deftly written and vividly imagined, a real pleasure to read at length and relax into.

>>54543289
Malazan

>>54561091
There are few pieces of fantasy fiction shittier than Elric, but you've just named one of them.

>>54543460
He didn't get crucified for trying to seize power, if you're talking about the Witch is Born story with Salome, or whatever it's called. He was the only one in the city to recognize the queen had been replaced and, after slaughtering like 30 men by himself, was eventually swarmed and dragged out to be crucified by the Falcon. You're right about his taking over the desert tribes, though. Was pretty great when he broke that guy's arm and used the whole 'if you're strong, you'll survive' line on him that had been fed to him.

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>>54549264
>On an unrelated note, did anyone else find the character of Conan kind of obnoxious reading Howard's stories
No. I don't think I could ever find Howard's writing obnoxious, particularly his Conan stuff.

Savage Sword of Conan comics are great too, by the way.

>>54560096
Sort of? In that People of the Black Story or whatever, he fights that Khemsa dude who is a mezmerist and knows some kind of weird magical martial arts. It was pretty much a stalemate. Actually, think he may've been losing before the other Circle wizard guys intervened and killed Khemsa's waifu.

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New challenge: Conan VS Kharn.
Both get weapons of their choice but no guns/tanks/power armor. Who wins?

>>54561392
Kharn tears him apart, conan is as good as any human could theoretically be but kharn in the crusade era was a 200-year old post-superhuman eight-foot killing machine who orgasms from murdering things, and he's spent ten millennia killing shit since then

>>54549264
Blasphemy. I bet you're a Stgyian.

>>54549565
Ha! I remember that. That was fantastic.

>>54549578
Eh, it's probably a taste thing. I read them all in one go and thought they were great. My personal favorite story ended up being "The People of the Black Circle", although "Beyond the Black River" was fucking amazing and I can see why so many people call it the best.

The one novel-length story, "Hour of the Dragon", reads like a Conan greatest hits album and is great too.

>>54543289
They're seriously exaggerating it. The Eric series is interesting and imaginative; Eric is also a rather believably damaged protagonist who stands out as a unique figure of the genre. My only real complaint about the series is the Moorcock'so prose is a bit flat.

>>54549565
Don't remember that. What I'm talking about is most embodied in that scene where he effortlessly bests a guy (through sheer animal strength I belive Howard said) described as one of the best swordsmen in the world, after weeks of a starvation diet scramble through a swamp. Ifor I had rolled my eyes any harder they'd have flown out of my head.

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>>54549264
I can get that. It's not so much Conan but Howard's constant narration of how righteous and powerful Conan is before he even starts acting. He's already a barbarian ubermensch, having the fucking narrator act as his personal cheerleeding squad makes it feel like the whole world is stacked in his favour. I get it's supposed to be an epic tale of an invincible hero but it goes so far as to remove the curtain of belief and constantly reminds us that he will always come out on top which totally ruins the hope of any kind of tension.

Otherwise the prose is great and the action is intense but I'd rather Conan's feats speak for themselves.

>>54556458

Elric stories were fucking great

>>54542621
Conan would absolutely decimate. He held his own on a one-on-one fight against a guy who can fight and win agains literal armies.

>>54543368
Is Dark Agnes any good?

>>54542621
The only thing Conan wears is plot armor.
So him against Danaerys would be a fair fight.

>>54542621
Well, if you go by the ASoIaF rpg, I've seen a single Bravosi TPK the entire Kingsguard in that game without being touched once, so, I have a feeling Conan would do okay.

>>54564239
If I remember right isn't that the one where the guy has murdered the shit out of his entire squad of pirate rapist hillbillies.
Shadows in Iron or something? If so that guy wasn't the best swordsman in the world, he's basically a decadent general and a cruel cunt.
And Conan janks him like a motherfucker because he's rage-fuck furious over the death of his men

>>54560096
The wizard in Hour of the Dragon is prety much Conan with dark magic. And Conan's sword is completely useless against that wizard, because he gets defeated by some wizards that decide to help Conan because unlike the previous king, Conan let those wizards live in peace.

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>>54569728
Yeah:
>'Ha!' It was like the bark of a timber wolf. 'Shah Amurath, the great Lord of Akif! Oh, damn you, how I love the sight of you—you, who fed my comrades to the vultures, who tore them between wild horses, blinded and maimed and mutilated them—ai, you dog, you filthy dog!' His voice rose to a maddened scream, and he charged.
>In spite of the terror of his wild appearance, Olivia looked to see him fall at the first crossing of the blades. Madman or savage, what could he do, naked, against the mailed chief of Akif?
>There was an instant when the blades flamed and licked, seeming barely to touch each other and leap apart; then the broadsword flashed past the saber and descended terrifically on Shah Amurath's shoulder. Olivia cried out at the fury of that stroke. Above the crunch of the rending mail, she distinctly heard the snap of the shoulder-bone. The Hyrkanian reeled back, suddenly ashen, blood spurting over the links of his hauberk; his saber slipped from his nerveless fingers.
>'Quarter!' he gasped.
>'Quarter?' There was a quiver of frenzy in the stranger's voice. 'Quarter such as you gave us, you swine!'
>Olivia closed her eyes. This was no longer battle, but butchery, frantic, bloody, impelled by an hysteria of fury and hate, in which culminated the sufferings of battle, massacre, torture, and fear-ridden, thirst-maddened, hunger-haunted flight. Though Olivia knew that Shah Amurath deserved no mercy or pity from any living creature, yet she closed her eyes and pressed her hands over her ears, to shut out the sight of that dripping sword that rose and fell with the sound of a butcher's cleaver, and the gurgling cries that dwindled away and ceased.
Just some decadent nerd noble, not the best swordsman in the world.
Also in that particular story Conan nearly gets his arms pulled off by a Gorilla, gets captured by a bunch of pirates and has to be rescued by his waifu of the week.
You'd be surprised reading back how often Conan gets dunked on.

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>>54542621
this is now a Conan thread

>>54569748
King Conan is pretty much great, people say that Conan doesn't change and he's pretty much the same in every story, but watching the barely literate barbarian of the early stories who cares for nothing but lining his own pockets turn into the kinda nigga that'd say this:
>Conan: I found Aquilonia in the grip of a pig like you—one who traced his genealogy for a thousand years. The land was torn with the wars of the barons, and the people cried out under oppression and taxation. Today no Aquilonian noble dares maltreat the humblest of my subjects, and the taxes of the people are lighter than anywhere else in the world. What of you? Your brother, Amalrus, holds the eastern half of your kingdom, and defies you. And you, Strabonus, your soldiers are even now besieging castles of a dozen or more rebellious barons. The people of both your kingdoms are crushed into the earth by tyrannous taxes and levies. And you would loot mine—ha! Free my hands and I'll varnish this floor with your brains!
Is great

>>54549739
>>54549770
These were both pretty great stories desu. The Thor one especially.

>>54569786
In Hour of the Dragon Conan also barely survives a ghoul attack. A ghoul slashes at him, splitting his metal helmet in two. When the ghoul goes a second attack, Conan fucking runs.

>>54569900
Come to think of it... IIRC, Hour of the Dragon has quite a few moments where Conan survives simply because he wears a helmet or cuirass. None of that loincloth barbarian bullshit.

>>54569914
>>54569900
Basically the only time Conan goes full loincloth is when he's climbing shit since, well, difficulty of climbing in armour and shit.

>>54547019
He also was trying to reflect the sun in his eyes with his helmet

>>54543460
No. His waifu was replaced by her witch twin sister and Conan saw through it. He still killed like 50 dudes before he got swarmed by a mob of mercenaries.

>>54569786
>You'd be surprised reading back how often Conan gets dunked on.
Honestly that's one of the things which endears me to the character, is how he gets slam-jammed but rolls with it and bounces back.

>>54542621
Conan wins. Written by a brawler, not a fatass

>>54569786
I guess I misremembered it. I could have sworn Howard mentioned the guy being one of the best swordsmen in the world.

I still can't help but find the character of Conan to leave something of a sour taste in my mouth. As I said, the stories were entertaining enough, but I can totally see why Moorcock said "man, this is some brainless crap, let's write something with some depth."

>>54549794
More!

>>54572512
And he failed!

>Muh heavy handed critiques of muh country
>Muh humans are shit

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>>54544476
Doing gods work anon.

Let's bump this shit.

MOTHERFUCKING CONAN VS ELRIC!

You see me now a veteran of a thousand psychic wars.

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>>54573451

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>>54573459
And yes. This is probably canon to both Conan and Elric.

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>>54573470

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>>54573618

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>>54573870
And done.

Thanks for reading.

>>54573822
Thanks for posting this!

>>54557043

I like how obvious fanboy posts tend to be.

>>54574020
Oh come on, get real. Conan is notorious for being a cunning warrior but he's not prepared to take on the sorts of summons Elric will pull out, let alone the soul sucking cunt that is that sword.

>>54573055
I thought he did excellently. The Elric saga was a novel read with some very evocative visuals, and a believable, flawed protagonist that wasn't some barbarian ubermensch who never makes a poor choice; it examined the basic assumptions of the genre quite well. The fact Moorcock makes so many people assmad is just icing on the cake.

>>54575278
Oh, Moorcock's writing as a fantasy author was fantastic and wonderful from a genre perspective and he is one of my favourite authors.

But he doesn't produce anything more than just a good story.

>>54575374
Yeah, OK. I still say his works examined the basic assumptions of the genre quite well. It was considerably less brainless than Howard's work.

>>54549548
Oh, oh, I have one of those books. The Legend of Druss. I picked it up at a used book sale.

I stopped reading 2 chapters in when Druss's psychic girlfriend (wife?) told a friend of hers she was psychic literally the page after a flashback of her father telling her to NEVER tell anyone because bad things would happen.

Is the rest of the book worth reading?

>>54575555
I don't think they were less brainless. Howard was very well read and a lot of his writing was informed by historiography of the time. Conan gets shat on a lot because Howard was one of the first writers in the genre and also due to the format in which he was writing. Moorcock was third generation and now people will look at Elric books and Ekerose and such and say the same things you say about Conan.

>>54575568
>literally the page after
If she'd told it literally the next sentence, it could've been hilarious.

>>54547039
Better question: which Westori lady gets to be the one in this girl's position after Conan wins everything ever?

>>54575581
Brainless doesn't mean poorly written. They were entertaining and while not technically skilled, his prose was fantastic. But they however were completely lacking in any sort of deeper themes or complexity. They can largely be summed up as "Conan is awesome and will always win at no appreciable cost to himself."

Those closest to a deeper theme you find within it is Howard's short ramble about barbarism being the natural state of man, which reeks more of Howard's sense of anomie than any attempt at instilling his work with meaning. Howard himself said that he only wrote for the sole purpose of making a living off of writing.

Also Howard would be second generation in the genre, following in Burrough's footsteps.

>>54575632
But Moorcock's work lack any sort of depth beyond just being a commentary on the fantasy hero, of which I'd argue are less an active deconstruction and more just going in a different direction. In addition, you can only really point to Elric on that. Corum, Hawkmoon, etc are all skilled, phsycially fit fighters, who might suffer captivity and some mutiliation of sorts, but those things also existed in the fantasy/sci-fi genre before.

>>54575631
Daenerys, naturally. Conan went for slaves and royalty more often than anything else, and she's -both-.

>>54575590
Turns out I was wrong.
The warning flashback is on page 12 and she tells her friend at the beginning of page 14, while most of 13 is her leading up to telling.

>>54575665
There's more to Elric than just being an inversion of Conan. He frequently makes poor decisions, and the world itself doesn't seem willing to just up and sort itself out to see that his actions work out for the best. The basic question of the work seems to be how things would play out if the hero isn't always right to use force to see their aims realized.

>>54575568
I'd read them.
Start with Legend. You can see where Druss goes that way.
It's some great shit.

>>54543209
I think you're giving conan dirty trick props that Jamie should also get. Nothing about him ever screams honorable in combat. But it'd probably still end with conan butchering him

>>54575727
>There's more to Elric than just being an inversion of Conan
That was actually incidental, not intentional. While his editor at the time wanted "something like Conan" he eventually opted to use Zenith the Albino as inspiration. Both are drug addicted lords who lost their heritage in conflicts beyond their controls.

It just so happened that it suited Moorcock's intent for writing an anti Conan.
Just a fun fact.
>>54575665
>Elric on that. Corum, Hawkmoon, etc are all skilled, phsycially fit
>Elric
>Physically fit.

Um....Are we talking about the same Elric. He's a skilled fighter but only when he's holding Stormbringer or juiced up.

>>54576280
I was comparing Elric which most people use as a shorthand for Moorcock's work to his other characters.

Speaking of Elric, i have a confession to make.

I think i like Stormbringer the book, more than Return of the King.
It's a better story and conclusion imo.

Also on a related note, which Conan related omnibus would ya recommend?

>>54572512
>Moorcock
>Depth

You would have to be an idiot to think this. Moorcock has as much depth as the half scribbled writings of a hippy on enough LSD to kill an elephant.

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>>54576385
Then i'm a huge idiot because i've always liked Elric and believe that Moorcock has had great ideas and depths.

>>54543313
Srsly? Aragorn is a solid swordsman but there's no way he's Conan Caliber. He's not nearly as strong, fast, durable OR experienced (depending on what age you make the Conan he is to face) and sure he's killed lots of orks and uruks, a cave troll or two (with help from friends) but he can't claim nearly the single handed feats that Conan can.

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>>54576455

>>54576455
Moorcock's decribed himself as a bad author with good ideas. I agree and I like what he's writing.

>>54576561
That's how I feel about Frank Herbert.

>>54576458
http://lotr.wikia.com/wiki/Aragorn_II_Elessar


Tolkien gives a brief but detailed description of him in The Lord of the Rings: lean, dark, tall, with "a shaggy head of dark hair flecked with grey, and in a pale stern face a pair of keen grey eyes."[8]

In The Tale of Aragorn and Arwen, he was said to be often grim and sad, with unexpected moments of levity.[5] Some time after the publications of the books, Tolkien wrote that he was six feet six inches tall.

Aragorn possessed Elven wisdom due to his childhood in Rivendell with Elrond and the foresight of the Dúnedain. He was also a skilled healer, notably with the plant Athelas (also known as Kingsfoil). He was also a mighty warrior and an unmatched commander; after the Battle of the Pelennor Fields, he, Éomer, and Imrahil were said to be left unscathed, even though they had been in the thick of the fighting.

Though there is no indication of his ever doubting his role and destiny as the future king of the Reunited Kingdom and one of the leaders of the war against Sauron (as he did in Peter Jackson's film), he was not immune to self-doubt, as he doubted the wisdom of his decisions while leading the Fellowship after the loss of Gandalf in Moria, and blamed himself for many of their subsequent misfortunes.

>>54578605
On one occasion, his pride (or reverence for his heritage) led to complications, as he refused to disarm and leave his sword Andúril (a priceless heirloom of Númenor and one of the weapons which slew Sauron) at the door of Edoras, as Théoden had required, and only did so after Gandalf left his own sword (also of high lineage) behind. Even so, he swore that death would come to anyone else who touched it (whether by his own hand or by some magic, it is left unsaid).

He also appeared to possess a nigh-indomidable will. At one point, he was able to psychically challenge Sauron for control of the Palantir of Orthanc, and proved victorious in that struggle. It should be noted that even Gandalf the White was reluctant to use the Palantir for fear of challenging Sauron directly and revealing himself to the Dark Lord. He was accounted as "the hardiest of living Men" during his lifetime.

>>54578617
As a Ranger, Aragorn was trained to be proficient with various weapons, such as bows, knives, spears and swords In battle he focused primarily on his sword play, preferring close combat to a long scale fight. He was a mighty warrior, and as such easily defeated many types of foes, ranging from large groups of orcs to far more powerful foes such as Trolls and Ringwraiths, evident throughout various battles like Helm's Deep and the Morannon. In each case, Aragorn's finesse in battle has served him greatly and earned him much recognition and respect from both the Fellowship of the Ring and the people of Rohan and Gondor. He was arguably the greatest swordsman of the Third Age, surpassing the likes of Faramir, Boromir and perhaps even Elrond.

Aragorn's sword is Andúril, Flame of the West, the reforged sword Narsil, Elendil's blade that Isildur used to cut the One Ring from Sauron's hand. Aragorn uses it with the same skill the Numenoreans had long ago.

>>54578673
>>54578617
>>54578605
So considering this and the enthusiastic Conan wanking in this thread, why are fa/tg/uys so prone to shrieking about Sues and snowflakes again?

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>>54580803
I think at least part of the issue is time. Fantastic fiction staring fantastically powerful were relatively "new" to modern fiction at the time Conan, John Carter, the Lord of the Rings, and similar stories were originally written. While many are based on sources and styles that are literally ancient, such characters and story types were not common in decades immediately preceding those works.
These proved popular enough to serve as inspiration for future stories in the following decades.

However, unlike the readers of the previous generation, these story types and characters are not new to us. They are staples, common, and familiar.

I don't think modern readers dislike "mary sue" characters for any reason other than boredom. We are tired of them. The hard work of writing those characters, developing the tropes and such, is already done. Writing those characters is easy, and as such is seen as lazy.
I think people want something different because different requires more effort from the writer.

However, since we grew familiar with these types of characters through the likes of Aragorn and Conan and Elric and Batman, they have nostalgic value to us. We can accept their being over powered and faintly ridiculous because we grew up with them and because it was a "different time."
Also, due to our nostalgia, we use those older characters as a measuring stick, a stick new characters of that vein will inevitably fail to measure up to.

So, we expect new characters to not be Mary Sues because we are bored with them and subconsciously don't think people can do them right anymore anyway.

>>54569955
To be fair to Conan he has never had a problem with local custom/dress, sensible dude, also rightly fears magic.

Conan vs. Guts.

Who wins?

>>54578617
gandalf was as powerful as sauron when gandalf the white, his fear was corruption - the chance that he might replace sauron.

>>54582099
Guts in his Berserk Armor would beat Conan handily.

Against regular Guts, I guess Conan would try to do what Serpico did, try to fight Guts on terrain where the Dragonslayer and the arm cannon would be at a disadvantage.

>>54582099
>>54582148

I just realised that Guts sort of started physically as a Conan clone... and he'll probably end as an Elric clone.

His physical decay has already been set in motion, because in the Seagod saga Guts notices how the colours and light of the world are slowly fading away when he heals from his wounds.

>>54578605
>>54578617
>>54578673
Nothing you wrote makes Aragorn a peer to Conan. Conan would trash him.

>>54582603
You mean aside from being a cunning swordsman of peerless skill with unnatural foresight?

Seriously, why the hell is Conan supposed to be so fucking capable anyway? He's not fucking Achilles, he's just some random bumfucker from nowhere. I never could swallow the fact he never finds an equal.

>>54582792
It's that way for a lot of fantasy heroes. I think the fact that they're rando chucklefucks from East Jesus Nowhere is supposed to solidify how cool they are. It simultaneously elevates them beyond the reader and makes them somewhat relatable (if done right).

Or, destiny/fate is a theme.

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>>54582792
Because he's the protagonist?

>>54582792
>>54582819
Conan is more of representation of the working class man during the 1930's, capable, strong, and willing to go wherever there is wealth to be found. He's not destined to be anything but rather he makes his own destiny.

>>54549722
My parents bought me this when i was 7 because i liked the original trilogy ;_;

>>54583151
How can you even figure out the original trilogy at that age?

>>54584412
I used to read a lot that time. Everything i could lay my hands on, including all the first Harry Potter books

Not saying it was exactly 7 yo, but somewhere around that. I don't remember much.

If I wanted to get into the Conan comics, where should I begin?

I've already read Howard's short stories.

>>54584524
Either you're thinking of the Silmarillion or you are still a small child because that only came out a few years ago bro

>>54584791
Well, i'm 19 right now, that's not much

>>54584779
Read all of Savage Sword of Conan. Then go on to the Dark Horse series.

>>54584412
Not that guy But I laso read LOTR around the age of 8-9. SIlmarillion broke me, I was never able to read more then 30% in.

Speaking of Silmarillion, who wins between Conan and Fingolfin?

>>54584818
I guess it really did come out 10 whole years ago, fucking fancy that

>>54584881
Filgolfin. Just about any of the First Age elves could trash him.

>>54584881
Fingolfin. First Age anything is asshole but strong.

>>54542752
This is your once-a-thread reminder that Conan was a terrible king, barely interested in ruling and completely incapable of preventing unrest in his kingdom. He's a lot like Robert Baratheon if you think about it.

>>54582922
>the typical working class man is an invincible badass who kills, steals, and fucks his way through the world with impunity

This is what nerds think the life of a jock is like.

>>54584881
Depends on how much you believe the stuff that goes on in the Silm. It's supposed to be Bilbo's translation of elvish legends about the first age, and even the rest of the stuff in LoTR proper is supposed to have narrative ambiguity and there are a few deliberate errors stuck in.

If you take it at face value, then Conan probably can't even beat a regular no-name Noldor dude, let alone Fingolfin. If you think it's got heavy heapings of bullshit exaggerating all the stuff going on there, then who knows.

>>54582792
Because of the author's double-standard. Everyone more civilized than Conan is a weak, pampered nonce, and everyone less civilized than Conan is a moronic sub-human, sometimes literally.

>>54585589
Tolkien elves don't have legends in the same way humans do. They have eyewitness accounts. They were there.

What about Conan versus Rincewind?

>>54585619
Except for the fact that a lot of the heroic legends and stuff contained in the Silmarillion, like Ungoliant's origins, Fingolfin's blow by blow duel with Morgoth, Hurin's last stand, Beren's deeds as an outlaw, and stuff like Turin's wanderings in and around Nargothrorond are stuff that DON'T have elven witnesses there, or at least not ones that lived to tell anyone about it.

Throw in actual recordings of elves throwing generous portions of bullshit even within the narrative (Check out Feanor's speech about how great Cuivinien is, the Cuivinien he's never been to), and it is very probable that yes, elves have legends and tall tales and bullshit, same as humans do.

>>54585641
I'd say Rincewind only has a million to one chance.

>>54585556
>Robert Baratheon
I read somewhere that Robert was an homage to Conan.

>>54585641
Barbarians in Diskworld are parodies of Conan. Rincewind will fare just fine by not pissing the big scary dude.

>>54585787
Yeah, Conan's relationship with tha wizard-priest of Mithras shows he's perfectly capable of cooperating with a wizard that isn't trying kill him or fuck around with dark and eldritch forces, and 'Half a Brick in a Sock' Rincewind is exactly the sort of wizard he'd get along with.

>>54586793
I can just imagine Conan seeing Rincewind wrapping the sock around his hand after pushing a bring into it and laughing approvingly.

How would Conan handle Samurai Jack?

>>54589799
I'd go like it did with the Scotsman.

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>>54553027

A better match-up would be Conan vs Guts

>>54543518
Steppe*

>>54542690
>Westeros = ASOIAF

>>54585565
What else is someone supposed to do in a pseudo-ancient setting? Half the ancient heroes do nothing but this and no one has a problem with it.

>>54590312
Nah, that's a lot like trying to compare Conan to aSoIaF, only in the opposite direction. Different genre conventions make Guts far more powerful.

>>54592137
It's that sort of thing were the only, and best, outcome would be that they form a begrudging friendship, and if that does not sound like the tightest shit ever get out of my face.

>>54582792
All cimmerians are supposedly badasses, and conan was genetically gifted even for a cimmerian. He was literally born on a battlefield, so it's almost like his destiny. Also, he's been adventuring since he was 14, and he keeps going right up to his 70s.

>>54543267
>Sasuke levels of bad
What a sad plebeian creature we have here.

>>54542972
>joining the army of whoever's currently sitting on the Iron Throne, making friendly with all the troops and getting him to like them, then turning that army against whoever's currently on the Iron Throne and personally leading the troops to seize it himself, slaughtering anyone who gets in his way.
Ahhhaaha hahahah aha
I've never read conan and this sounds like the dumbest shit

>>54553468
what a prick, why'd he have to do that?

>>54593627
The first encounter is Conan drunk off his ass and having never encountered camels, a city of any real size, or civilised ways before. He does it because he *is* a barbarian. The second time is from an infinitely worse movie and should just be discounted.

>>54572116
>Often gets dunked on
>Clever fella
>Not super book learned
>Better than you'd think at sneaking
>Mighty in his chosen field
>Beautiful ladies wanting his dick left and right after he's vanquished some foul thing
>Orphaned at an early age by evil shit
>Regularly faces demons
>Taunts while fighting, unless unimaginably angry or focused

I think Harry Dresden and Conan might have more in common than we've thought.

>>54543289
Quite enjoyed Mark Lawrence's Prince of Thorns series, mostly for the setting though.