>Grizzled human adventurer who has butchered thousands >Retire

>>54073605
why though
>Gnomes are annoying
>All the stuff is too small for you
>You can't fuck the local girls
There's no good reason for it

>>54073765
>You can't fuck the local girls.
Says who?

>>54073765
>You can't fuck the local girls
I retired in Gnome-ville just to fuck these 2 feet tall girls.

>>54073765
tell that to gargamel

>>54073765
why won't you fuck the local girls?

>>54073785
>>54073786
>>54073820
it would be like screwing a toddler, it takes a very particular set of tastes to enjoy that

>>54073765
His dick is small, but for a gnome it's huge.
All you can fuck buffet.

>>Retire in a peaceful Gnome village

To protect them right?

File: 1498244292523.jpg (28KB, 229x253px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 229x253px

>>54073858
Gnomes don't look like children you autist, nor midgets. Just two feet tall adults.

>>54073858
If I remember correctly, in the BoEF Gnomes wrote the fantasy equivalent of the Kama Sutra. They're kinky little shits.

>>54073858
>A toddler with a full set of hips and tits and ass
>No baby fat
>A fully developed mind with the ability to carry a conversation
>With a skill set relevant to and developed from years of life in their village

It's like these people don't think.

File: El Gato.jpg (106KB, 1200x823px) Image search: [Google]

106KB, 1200x823px

>>54073858

> he's never had intercourse with a mature but petite shortstack

>>54073605

Isn't that the Chinese dwarf village?

File: Swing-Bob-Haircut.jpg (27KB, 500x681px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 500x681px

I looked up 'short stacked' onGoogle image search to see what it is, but all I get is pictures of funny hair cuts.

>>54075035
It's pretty strait forward as far as fetish names go

File: 1444236475873.jpg (20KB, 220x315px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 220x315px

>>54073995
>BoEF
Ugh. Did anybody actually use that? You'd think fa/tg/uys would be degenerate enough to not need a splatbook for ERP.

>>54075035
That's the classic "I'd like to speak to your manager" haircut.

>>54075068
I've never used it in an actual game, but it's a pretty fun read, if only for the absurdity of it. They actually took the time to figure out what half-breed races would be possible with a selection of creatures types and made a goddamn table of it.
Not to mention the entire page trying to reason if fucking a vampire is necrophilia or not (Spoiler, it's not if the vampire's eaten recently).

That said though, it's actually pretty decent as far as absurd ERP shit goes. Keeps on topic, give suggestions for how players can include sexual content without making a bad D&D porn parody, and some interesting ideas on keeping the game from being too creepy.

I just want to impress on everybody the fact that this thread and this discussion happened. I'd just like you all to think what that says of the mental health of western culture

>>54076021
It says nothing.

>>54073765
>why though
Personally I like to do this with tiny catfolk and an old, blind, ancient dragon
The agreement can be mutually beneficial. The warrior is old, bitter and sick of battle. The gnomes are kind and trusting to the point of naïveté and downright helpless. With a proven warrior of his reputation settling down in the village, outsiders will think twice about messing with them. Meanwhile the gnomes will probably give him the tranquility he so much desires. As long as the gnomes aren't too loud (which shouldn't be a problem if the warrior settles down in an isolated part of town) everything should be fine.

>>54076021
Yeah you should get your mental health checked you chineser

>>54075149
>(Spoiler, it's not if the vampire's eaten recently)
That is the single dumbest solution they could have come up with.

>>54076021
ah so, western pigdogs are weak of mind

their chi is unbalance

File: df2c8a63a9580f3ef33c6dd308e9ab09aa47bcab6049d559c6214be7e4cc940a.jpg (44KB, 420x420px) Image search: [Google]

44KB, 420x420px

>>54076021
>being surprised /tg/ wants to fuck something

>>54073858
Its awwwright

File: 1473266252739.jpg (48KB, 750x754px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 750x754px

>>54073605
Something is wrong with that bridge. This is a trap.

>>54077464
Underrated post.

>>54077464
Ancient memes.

>>54077304
Their justification for it is that vampires get closer to living when they feed, in that they get some warmth to their skin and more artifacts of mortal existence shortly after a feeding. By their own logic, a vampire could theoretically get pregnant, but would have to basically be crazy well fed through the entire process for the child to survive.