God dammit people, show some manners when you are at the table

People need to learn how to shower.
People need to learn how to wear clothing such that their ass-crack doesn't show.

People don't show up.

>>53793390
People need to learn to not do goatse imitations at the table.

Another guy also really needs cut his fingernails like there are almost 3 inches long

>>53793723
is there a story to this

>>53793984
Not a great one. We had someone thinking it was funny to do the "halfling rogue with an epic level hide check can hide up the asshole of another party member". The DM said that it was stupid and wasn't allowing it, when the player who voiced the idea said that it would be easy to fit something small like a hobbit, and then moved to spread his own ass as wide as it could go as "proof".

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>>53794054
Not only was that incredibly stupid to begin with it was unoriginal (pic related)

>>53794114
People need to know not to try to imitate greentext stories the read on 4chan in their games

Texting. Its so rude to be on your phone all the damn time.

>>53794181
Collect phones before the game in a felt lined basket covered in glitter with a finger-paint person on the side of it (For personality....and mostly shame). I had to get 6 schedules to line up for 5 hours of the week, PUT YOUR FUCKING PHONE IN THE BEAUTIFUL BASKET, TOM.

Also keys, but that's cause we like our booze. You may have them back when you can recite *THAT* part of Hardware Store from a sheet without more than 2 errors.....at your own speed, of course, I'm not a monster.

>getting too drunk or high to function
>being on your phone
>having loud off topic conversations with other players
Game would be so much better if they could stop doing all these things.

>multiple people playing mobile gachas at the table
>one has a laptop out browsing Facebook
>players initiating combat with each other over petty shit like 'borrowing' potions so they don't fucking die
>only one is smart enough to get out of trouble and roleplay properly
>none of them have a taste for alcohol so I'm the only one loose enough to have fun in storytelling
More than once I have packed up my books early due to misconduct but they have the audacity to say I'm tripping.

REEEEing. It's kinda annoying when you do it irl

>>53793390
Is someone getting the best of you?

>>53793390
>>53793418
>>53794299
>>53794504
The fact these need to be mentioned and aren't just common sense is pretty depressing. And before you go "Well TTRPGs attract autists" Nigga people with Autism know this shit. This is basic stuff.

>The player who never brings or gives thanks to those who bring food for the group yet eats enough for two anyways
>The player who has to be repeatedly told to chew with his mouth closed
Spoiler: they're the same person.

cheap ass mother fuckers can't be bothered to buy dice or a PHB, that's fine though I can fuck them over with my shitty dice and I can run the game however i want

>>53795050
>Nigga people with Autism know this shit. This is basic stuff.
Autist here. Can confirm.

Most of these annoyances apply away from the table.

>Buy some fucking dice
Not having PHB is a-okay in the shithole I'm in. But new players not buying dice before session #2 - that's haram, that's blasphemy. I don't give a shit you don't have time - you literally can't drive to my place without driving by our FLGS (fuck their MtG tournaments though, can't run a public game in a suitable nerdy place because of these cardboard munchers).

>Turn up for my fucking games
If you miss 3 sessions in a row (we play weekly on weekends, ffs) - I can do whatever I want with your PC. He is my NPC now, fuck off until the next campaign. I don't give a shit about your rotating work schedule. Go play some play-by-post rpgs over in the web.

>Put down your fucking phone
Yeah, I know you're flipping through your spellbook in that fucking app. I don't give a shit if you miss something - especially your fucking turn.

>Warn DM if you're running fucking late
Send me a text. Give me a call. I don't give a shit how - you tell me and I adapt, you don't - and I adapt in a way you won't like.

>Be friendly to other fucking players
Come on, we are all adults here. I don't give a shit you've not had social interactions in a week - I will not tolerate outright weirdos. And don't fuckin' dare talk shit to women at the table - my wife, my buddy's GF and his older sister are all my regulars and will fuck you up in combat, roleplay or in a real life brawl.

Hope I will not have to explain rules of hygiene to anyone anytime soon. Except one thing - it's customary to take off your shoes when you come into someone's house around here. So put on some clean fucking socks.

>>53793390

that sounds pretty bad.

I fucking hate adventure league though since all campaigns at the 2 game stores in my area collapsed after adventure league came to town so I have less sympathy for you.

>>53795832
>#1
I spent about $50 on a few hundred low quality dice and I'll give anyone who wants them a set. It's just easier that way.

>>53796056
I bought two Chessex Pound-O-Dice bags too back in the day, so I gift new players d20s, but remind them that they need complete sets for the next game, preferably of the color nobody uses around the table. Not all of them remember though. Hence the #1.

>>53793390
>Shows up an hour late (consistently)

If you have someone who does that, lie to that person about the time being an hour early and let the rest come on time. He'll be on time as well.

Can't help you with the rest.

>>53795832
Not that I disagree with you, but you sound like a spastic internet tough guy autismo faggot

>>53797204
Yeah.
I don't doubt the wife, buddy, buddy's GF and her sis are his only regulars because nobody else will put up with him.

>>53797214
I mean what sort of fucking faggot has a rule to not talk shit to women at the table, how about just a rule to not be an actual sincere cunt
in my group we all talk shit to eachother, he sounds fucking white knight faggot tier
And that's on top of the autism that his post radiates

>>53795832
Jesus Christ you're a cringelord, goddamn

>>53794233
I'll stop using my phone when you stop paralyzing, mind controlling, leaving unconscious, killing and don't let me play with a new char but force me to stay, etc for hours

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>>53795832
>If you insult m'ladies honor I will be forced to use 10% of my power to stop you.

>>53795832

>roleplay or real life brawl

Cringe.

>>53795832
>>Be friendly to other fucking players
Sure, you sound like friendly guy yourself.

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>>53793390
I am lucky to not have such problems, possibly due to being most autistic in both my groups. Yay, i guess.

>>53797453
>only 10%

A real man goes all out.

>>53795832
You sound like a real inflamed asshole. The kind that gets butthurt and upset instead of trying to calmly solve a conflict.

I wouldn't play in your game if you paid me.

>>53794233
No, I'll keep my phone and keys on me, thanks. I can't even imagine how weird some of you social freaks are in real life.

>>53795832
>feels the need to counter female autism with meme-tier autism of his own.

Nigga i don't give a fuck what vaginas you know. Trust your goddamed little rules. Backing anything like this up with threats makes you look like a colossal faggot

>>53795832
>And don't fuckin' dare talk shit to women at the table - my wife, my buddy's GF and his older sister are all my regulars and will fuck you up in combat, roleplay or in a real life brawl

kek

>>53793390
>show up an hour late.
Boot em. This shows they don't respect you or the other players time. I can forgive a lot, but a lack of punctuality tells me you don't actually want to play

>>53793390
>Show up an hour late (consistently)

They do this on purpose to see if you'll wait on them. Kick them out.

>>53793390
The bigger issue is faggots like you not having the balls to kick someone out of the group when they act this way.

>>53795185
>Not bringing food to the DM's place every week as thanks for DMing/using the area
What fucking degenerates.

>>53799845
We have a guy who makes banging meals for sessions but watching my players licking their fingers and eating messy food while rolling dice makes my skin crawl.

>>53793418
Sometimes I am happy that I grew up with sports instead games so my social group is developed enough so that shit like
>showering
Is taken for granted.

>>53793418
Is it a thing for people who hang around FLGS activites to be dirty as shit?
Three stores around my town have signs posted that players and customers must be clean at the least. I've seen the Yugioh players that meet every Thursdays and they look like walking roach motels.

>>53793390
Kick him from the group? Or are you THAT desperate for a player?

>>53795050
Yet I know autists who don't. So it really comes down to the individual not knowing, or the more likely possibility, not caring.

>>53793390
>show up an hour late (consistently)

I do this.
And I'm the GM

>>53797813
And risk causing countless civilian causualties in the process? A real man knows with great power comes great responsibility

People sticking their noses when a player is alone and completing a challenge or puzzle.

PC is alone with silly mirror puzzle, mirror is a true mirror but he can't figure out why the imp behind his shoulder is not where he is supposed to be.
That guy chimes in and starts berating the PC for taking a minute to figure it out.
DM: the imp is communicating with telepathy, he seems angry and full if hatred a true visage of pure evil, must save against terror, he doesn't sense any magic or spell.
Who is this, how do you speak to your friends with no magic, this is not sorcery, this is not of this world, imp vanishes in fiery portal. Days later in game the imp is again among us and it's master has come to collect specimens that work this mystery magic that requires no efforts or spells PCs get abducted and pretty much TPK. It was a good campaign before that...

>>53803344
Wut?

>>53800559 #
>sports

Let me guess...traditional Greco-roman wrestling?
How many dicks do you have up your ass right now?
Stop flaunting your homosexuality, you queer.

>>53803344
What the fuck are you trying to say?

If you're the DM I don't think you have any right to complain about players.

Eat before we start and bring your/food/snacks/beer.

Quit it with your smoke breaks Tyler and Roger

>>53804357
Eat before, or bring my food? I am confused.

Actually i feel something like smoke breaks could be awesome thing to have. Little "commercial break" so that we could get some fresh air, stretch and return invigorated. Too bad noone in my groups smokes.

>>53803881
Try again friend. :^)

>>53804514
Smoke breaks are great, even if all you're really doing is taking 10 to stretch and piss. The only one who ever complained was the dude who would take a piss at the worst times and wasn't paying attention anyway. We booted him because it turned out he had zero personality and actually discussing something instead of being wallpaper caused him physical pain.

>>53794143
I swear if I have to turn down another fucking Old Man Henderson submission I'm going to throw someone out of a window.

>>53802398
This is fine. You're just giving the players extra time to get their shit together.

>>53804929
>being this much of a pig-bottom faggot.

How deadly is your strain, queer?

>>53805431
>>53804514
I don't allow smokers in my game. Your hourly smoke breaks water everyone's everyone time.

Also, you smell, and your teeth are vile.

>>53805808
I don't even smoke, but taking 10 is good for you. Enjoy your aneurysm from sitting on your ass.

>>53793390
>people who nap
>people who interrupt the session with side-conversation
>people who refuse to take notes
>people who get hungover the night before and don't show up
>>53793723
Now that's just unreasonable

>>53805808
every hour does sound like a bit much
and the teeth thing isnt an issue if they actually brush

>>53797416
Pay attention to what's going on in the game fuck wad, we're not here to fellate your character every minute of every session.

>>53805975
Why should anyone pay attention if they don't actually get to play?

This guy at my table rolls dice by putting them in his mouth and spitting them across the board. He will also pee in a bottle instead of getting up. He'll look you right in the eye as he does it and say
>Saves time, doesn't it?

>>53805992
Cooperative effort? Ever heard of it? If you fuck up and your guy gets incapacitated then that's on you. Pay attention so you know what everyone else is talking about once you're back in the game.

>>53806047
I came here to play a game, not watch other people play a game.

>>53797453

Not him and not a white knight but there is nothing wrong with telling male players not to act like creeps towards the female players. Bantz is fine but if players start acting pervy towards a female player and she is clearly uncomfortable with it they get one warning to knock it off and I tell them to leave my table if they do it again. Granted, at the moment I DM for pickup games with randoms at the local /tg/ store and many are new players so I don't want anyone who is new to D&D to have it ruined by some autist using telepathy to say lewd things to her PC so it might be a bit more relaxed if you are DMing for a group of friends. Still, it's not that hard to restrain from forcing your unwanted fantasies on somebody else who just wants to play the game and have a fun time.

>>53805784
>being this mad that someone had normal childhood and friends who don't get stared at in public

>>53806080
You came to participate in a game. Most, but not all, of that is playing your character. Fucking leave if you're only here to wank yourself off with no regard for anyone else at the table.

>>53806080
No, you came to jerk off. In a game you can fuck up and have consequences. You just want to slap your imaginary dick on the table.

>>53806150
>You came to participate in a game
I'm not when you remove me from the game 75% of the time

>>53806192
If you have a shit DM then take it up with him directly instead of being a pouty little bitch.

>>53806214
You ARE a shit GM.

>>53806047
>Cooperative effort
What has that anything to do with shutting down a player from the game?
Do you think cooperation means a player has to stop playing? you think that if he's playing there isn't cooperation? In what insane world do you live?
>If you fuck up
Implying. You can still be mindcontrolled, killed, render unconscious and a long etc even if you didn't fuck up
>Pay attention so you know what everyone else is talking about once you're back in the game.
Woah, That GM and a metagamer on top of that

>>53805961
>But time I spend brushing my teeth is less time I have to engage in my addiction

>>53805961
To be fair, taking a break every hour or so DOES improve people's ability to pay attention. There's a reason why schools do it.

>>53806223
Sure, whatever. Fucking grow a pair and confront your actual problems instead of whining like a little fuck stick to strangers on the internet.

>>53806245
I'm not a vindictive DM and I don't shut players down for shits and giggles. I don't whimper like a little bitch when players know more than their characters either because I trust them to roleplay properly. If you have a shit DM then take it up with him instead of defending behavior that is objectively shitty for people who don't have your shit DM.

>>53806104
We're not implying it's OK to be rude to girls.
On the contrary - our point it it is NOT OK to be rude to people _in general_.

Emphasizing girls make him sound bit white knight-y.

>>53803881
Are you insulting someone because they do sports? Seriously? Why?

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>>53806378

>>53806342

OK, but it is a gendered issue. I've never seen male players receive unwanted sexually-charged remarks from other players.

>>53806342
And the "I'll fight you irl bro" part is pretty goddamn cringy.

>>53793390
The DM for a 5e game I'm in yells at me when I try to roleplay, and is a massive min-maxer in a game he joined with me that a mutual friend is running.

>>53806104
>>53806412
You're changing the subject. Original poster said "talking shit", not "making passes".

>>53805642
Thanks anon, that's why I do it to be honest. I used to always show up on time, but after many cases of
>waiting outside for the host player to come back home because he went to the market or something
>chatting with another host's grandparents because he's still in the bath
>waiting for other players to show up
>waiting for players to calm down because they hadn't seen each other in a while and had a lot of stuff to chat about

I just started going late to circumvent those problems. It works.

This one player argues with me about the dumbest of things. "Why is the God of life good? Isn't life a trap? You never asked to be born, and where you are you are trapped into this horrible world until the day you die."

>>53806632
Similar note, I one had a player argue for, I shit you not, 2 hours with the GM that he should be allowed to teleport with Astral Projection. "Because if I send my mind there I can send the rest of me there"

>>53806455
That sucks. We have one player like this and it's bit... weird to try to RP, when you know this guy is bothered by it and considers it waste of time. But without RP, i feel like i could play video games instead.

>>53806106
>degenerate faggot that assumes no one notices his herpes scars in public

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>>53795832
>I will not tolerate outright weirdos. And don't fuckin' dare talk shit to women at the table - my wife, my buddy's GF and his older sister are all my regulars and will fuck you up in combat, roleplay or in a real life brawl.

>>53806378
>someone who plays children's schoolyard games expects me to respect them.

>>53807335
>ttgames
>not also a schoolyard game

>>53806015
This can't be real you faggot liar

>>53807654
Schoolyards don't have tables.

>>53807880
Checkmate atheists!

>>53795832
>And don't fuckin' dare talk shit to women at the table - my wife, my buddy's GF and his older sister are all my regulars and will fuck you up in combat, roleplay or in a real life brawl.

No, because I just got done fucking them in their whore mouths and assholes and if they say one goddamn thing I'll do the same to their mothers.

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Most of being good at roleplaying games is mostly just being a good person.

Hold on! Let me show you this funny video on my phone!

>>53794233
>>53794299
Phone etiquette is basic, just check the thing if either you're not in the scene or if is something actually important (a.i. your mom is dying of diarrhea)

>>53807880
Mine did.

>>53806412
I dm for 3 girls and 2 guys and it's uncomfortable as shit when they always try to lay the NPCs I'm role-playing as, or when they try to coerce male players into massive orgies at every inn. They also constantly have fantasy lesbian sex in dungeons, leaving the male players to struggle without their support.

>>53808799
Real shit? I would suggest pulling them aside and ask them to stop

>>53805586
if its original, are eccentric charcters allowed?

im talking eccentric like fear of shoes, cocaine addiction, and multi-personality...in one character

>>53806690
nigga...

>>53809717
Eccentric characters are one thing, and totally fine.

I'm talking about people who laugh at this "epick old man meme I read on teegee xD" and then show up to games with a an inch thick stack of papers for a backstory. I only skimmed through one the first time it happened and it was one of the shittiest things I'd ever read, after some stupid fanfic a guy I knew from a message board way back when that I only remember because I somehow stumbled onto learning it has a fucking tvtropes page.

Most of it was just "And then he did x and then he did y and he's also great at z" as constant run on sentences for however fucking many pages this thing went on for.

Nowadays any of them I get just go straight into the trash. If someone can't condense their backstory to 1-2 paragraphs, then it's not worth my time.

That said, anyone copying Old Man Henderson isn't worth my time either way, especially the people who still unironically believe it was a true story.

>>53795185
>>The player who has to be repeatedly told to chew with his mouth closed
Hey, fuck you bud. I have crazy-ass allergies, it's a miracle I'm not dead.

>>53793390
>1
Have a convo, find out why he's always late. I'm not super anal and this isn't a job but it's unfair to the other players to make them wait on him. He needs to fix it or he's out
>2
Adventure league is autistic, don't care. That being said if it's a requirement, it's a requirement. I sit down with him and sign him up on game night
>3
This is disgusting but I'm not his mom, I give him some friendly bants about it. "Can't say fucking excuse me bro?"
>4
Don't see a problem necessarily unless he makes a habit of trolling
>5
See 1. Talk to him, get it sorted or boot him out.

>>53793390
>playing/running adventurers league

You deserve it, to be honest.

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>>53795832
>And don't fuckin' dare talk shit to women at the table - my wife, my buddy's GF and his older sister are all my regulars and will fuck you up in combat, roleplay or in a real life brawl.

Holy shit, 10/10.

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>>53795832

>>53794233
I like to use my phone as a calculator, can I just put it on Airplane mode for the next few hours?

>>53806015
If this is real, tell him he has to drink the piss (all of it) if he wants to stay in the group.

This may backfire if it's his fetish, but in that case you could just kick his weird ass to the curb anyway.

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>that one faggot that doesn't use a coaster at the table

>>53803881
># #

>>53793723
Fuck man if I had a dollar for everytime this happened at one of the games I was in id have 17 dollars.

>>53805808
I've smoked for a decade and my teeth are pearly white. Some of you nerds are really sheltered.

>>53794143
Or if they try to make a character clone of something they heard on a podcast or if they just think in general it's going to be like a podcast they've heard.

>>53810757
>You must be sheltered

Right. Because being addicted to nicotine makes you so worldly.

>>53799845
The opposite is true in my group, GM provides snacks and hosts. I've been against it from day one but apprently it started that way when they'd eat and then play (at GM's house) but in a 'monkeys stop new inmates going up the ladder' way there're only one original member left but no one wants to change because 1) tradition/that's how it's always been done and 2) they'd be losing a 'turn' by providing as host then doing the new way or providing FOR host.
It annoys me because any GM is already doing enough by running the damn game.

>>53810070
You have crazy-ass autism if you can't make a dedicated effort to hide your disgusting mannerisms in public.

Alternatively: wear a burlap sack with eye holes next time around.

>>53793390
>show up an hour late
Even though ive told my group that i cant be there on the agreed time but be there without fail they still give me shit for being late
I cant shift my entire family agenda just to play games guys, meeting one hour later would be just enough

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>>53795832

>>53793390
>adventure league
Just learned about that and it doesn't deserve a thread.. I must be retarded, I don't get the difference between Adventure League and the good ol' "gather or recruit people to play pen and paper". The description on the officia site is so similar than the old method that I can't wrap my head around all this... Pls help

>>53801329
Is this meme really real? I mean sure, the people in the hobby might not be the most trimmed, in shape, or fashion-interested of people all the time but are grown people really required to be told to shower?

>>53806015
Why do you allow this? Is it some weird, deviant fetish-game your folks are playing?

>>53795832
what the fuck

>>53816886
A player I'm friends with almost always smells like unwashed asshole.

He's a real nice guy. Not really a neckbeard or otherwise socially incompetent, so I have no clue why he can't bother to shower or wear clean underwear or whatever he has to do to not reek of fresh shit after an hour sitting in a chair.

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>>53795832
>This entire post

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>>53795832
>And don't fuckin' dare talk shit to women at the table - my wife, my buddy's GF and his older sister are all my regulars and will fuck you up in combat, roleplay or in a real life brawl.

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>>53795832
>and will fuck you up in a real life brawl
I've seen weenies call their older brothers or fathers over to beat people up for them, but this is a new low.

>>53816886
I think its very real. The people that are usuals at the hobby stores often fit the stereotype of the autistic Monster-sipping weirdo
I also have stores in my city that have signs that tell people to keep themselves groomed and that its something they shouldn't have to tell people to do

>>53817102
Maybe he's depressed, or lazy.

>>53817102
Have you, you know told him, about his odour?
If so what was his reply?

>>53794299
I don't get the off-topic thing. One of the most enjoyable parts of gaming night is discussing tales of battle and adventure with friends at the table and occasionally making political references and memes. The only people who seem to get annoyed at this are younger players who don't have as many stories to share themselves.

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>>53817797
The depression part seems like a plausible explaination but I cannot really fathom that lazyness might be behind it.
I'm lazy as fuck but I still take a shower/bath atleast once a day. Then again I'm quite certain that I also was an elephant seal in my previous life.

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>running a campaign for friends at the FLGS
>everybody brought their magic cards
>in the middle of the game one of them pulls out a deck and silently draws a hand
>I get pretty flustered when I'm running so I try to pretend it's not happening
>they start playing lands, tapping them, and casting creatures
>I need to be more assertive... "Er, what are you doing?"
>"Just goldfishing."
>"Ah..."
>"I've been meaning to try this deck out for a while, 'cause I made some changes."
>"Ok..."
>game continues with the other two, the goldfishing guy is still paying attention when it's important so I guess it's not a problem
>the other two pull out their decks and start goldfishing as well, the first guy reshuffles and starts again
>I'm sitting at a table behind a screen with three players, each of whom are also goldfishing at the same time
I guess I'm just not a very interesting GM, or something? They all said they had fun at the end though, and they seemed pretty invested in it afterwards even though they were also playing with Magic cards for almost half of it. It was months and months ago but it still bothers me because I'm still not sure if I should be bothered or not by it.

>>53806412
Bull fucking shit you haven't. This has been a constant fucking problem in every game I've been with more than one female player. I know it's not all of them but when I'm 4/4 it gets to the point where I'm constantly bracing for the next smooth-as-gravel and subtle-as-a-freight-train advance.
I'm straight as a rainbow too, which only makes this most recent one try harder and she's the DM

>>53818504
What the hell is goldfishing?

>>53819634
Playing by yourself. In Magic, goldfishing is basically playing lands and casting spells as though you were playing a real game against an opponent. It's a good way to see if your land curve (that is, your deck's ratio of resource cards to cards that fulfill your objective) is good or needs adjusting.

>>53793390
I once had a guy change the place of meeting and not tell me until i was at the original place for like half an hour.
I was the DM of that game.
Fuck you, Beto.

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>>53795832
If some one is looking at their phone at the table either your DMing is bad (which is okay because we are not all brave enough to DM) or that player is bad and seems like a simple fix, just saying.

>>53793390
>the barbarian OOC doesn't pay attention and IC ditches combat so he can rape downed teammates
>the bard has no soul
>the cleric whores herself out to everyone
>the druid neither Wild Shapes nor casts spells, opting instead to depend on the stray dog the DM gave him for everything
>the fighter has a quantum backstory
>the monk is an uncooperative edgy cunt
>the paladin hoards magic items he can't even use away from those can use them
>the ranger committed suicide
>the rogue is chaotic evil, but is otherwise okay
>the sorcerer never made it to the game
>the stray dog gave the DM autism
>the wizard has unintentionally killed more allies than enemies because the DM can't understand spellcasting

>>53793723
I've been playing for 10 years now, and this happens at least once a year.

>>53820916
Maybe try not having 11 players.

>>53806412
>Most people who play tabletop are male
>Most males aren't gay
That's why

>>53793418
I remember getting an email from my FLGS directly asking people to please shower before coming in. It was pretty disgusting.

>>53822288
>Most gays don't do this shit

>>53795832
You should give the film 'Zero Charisma' a watch, though at least that guy was trying unlike you.

Majority of the shit anons have posted on here I have experienced. There is a fuck-ton of weird, basement dwelling, pillow humping, stink-ass, troglodytes that play these games.

They're smart, but they are fucking weird. Half of the time I don't know if they're role playing 24/7 or are they really like this all the time.

I wish I was able to get my other members on board with the idea of ROLEplaying, and not just pursuing the objectives. We're all close friends and I know our DM wouldn't mind some of us taking liberties with the flow of the campaign, but it seems hard to get people to open up. And it's hard to initiate because nobody wants to be that one guy who playing a character when everyone else is just themselves.

>>53806286
>There's a reason why schools do it.

Nigga, what?

>>53806412
Then clearly you've never had to sit next to That Guy as he goes over how everyone in the in is entranced by his sexy drow monk's delectable bosoms in the Fredricks of Faerun outfit she wears "cause monks need to move around and stuff" while air-fondling imaginary D cups over his used-to-be-white tshirt

>>53825137
I think alot of players are worried that roleplaying means they need to talk in funny voices and toss in lots of "prithy m'lady how art thou upon this marrow" shit rather than just putting some personality behind your character.

>>53826544
That's a fun one. As is the Yaoi fangirl who really wants it to get gay at least once and won't stop being weird about it, or the gay guy with boundary issues who doesn't get that the other guys might not want dick, or that the female player with the male PC isn't into that. Or the lesbian player that does "I want to fuck the barmaid" to a degree that would make "That Guy" say "chill out, man"

TLDR creepy fuckers aren't limited to one gender or orientation.

>>53806286
>There's a reason why schools do it.
What?

>>53810490
>>53794233
You niggerians do realize there are applications that help people D&D better, right?

D&D is best played with phones

>>53795832
(you)

>>53806104
it was the "AND IF YOU FUCKING DARE DO IT THEY WILL FUCK YOU UP IN COMBAT, RP, AND IRL!!!"

that's why everyone is kek'ing at this retard

>>53795832
holy shit

>>53826688
No game is enhanced by letting players be distracted easily by social media. It slows things down. Honestly, the biggest weakness of FFG SW is the custom dice are best dealt with using an app, thus opening up for players to keep their hands and eyes on their phones.
It's really a shame: tablets and ereaders could have been a great boon to playing tabletop, but because most people are autistic retards who cant ignore the flashing lights of their facebook memes, here I am trying to find a way to discourage phone use at the table without resorting to the super spergy "PHONES IN THE PHONE BASKET, REEEEEEE" nuclear solution.
So, to anyone trying to say that your phone use is more important than socializing with the group of friends that you have scheduled a weekly session with, if you really think that your text conversations are more important than the game, then get the fuck away from the fucking table, and find a different way to spend that night.
And it's not just my opinion as a GM, as I've had players complain to me about other players not paying attention. FFS, when other players complain to the GM, maybe you should consider how fucking glued you are to your fucking phone.
Anyway the best I've come up with is giving bonus XP for creativity and engagement, and withholding it if we have to fucking wait for someone to finish sending a goddamn text.:wq

>>53827320
The internet was great before social media. Maybe the problem isn't actually the phones and tablet. Maybe the problem is social media. Maybe Facebook was the cancer that shouldn't have occurred, maybe technology should have stayed back in the MSN, MySpace era. Maybe then people wouldn't be so autistic nowadays

Imagine a world where memes never left 4chan. Most people would find the internet boring like they used to, instead of what we have now where everyone is distracted all the time. not even him btw, just saw a chance to rant and went for it, it was my turn

>>53826688
>using phone apps instead of bringing a laptop and making a spreadsheet like a human being
That's the worst of all! Fiddling with a 5" touchscreen is even slower than just flipping through a printed book or using pen on paper.

>>53827462
meh call me an oldfag purist if you will but i need my books, sure having a few tabs on a tablet open is easier than having three full sized hard cover books balanced on your lap but its just not the same

>>53820916
the ranger is the only sane one

>>53795832
Those are valid points, but the way you explain them tells me that you're a That GM

>>53808432
I want to hold hands with cestree

>>53819281
Still better than seeing the two girls you play with make male characters and engage in cringy as fuck gay sex and half-assed relationships

One of them is my GF but really the cringe sometimes is shameful

>>53832240
THIS.

>>53827320
Have you tried weaving in their lack of attention into the game? Someone who is on their phone all the time could be represented in game by his character gettint lost in thought all the time and as such misses out on alot of xp, and various other subtle things he might otherwise been privy to IC. If the party is killing an ogre while that guy is day dreaming it would follow that he wouldn't get any xp as he didn't learn anything or actively pariticipated in the experience.
Then he has noone to blame but himself while also having an incentive to put away his phone.

>>53816886
I've found that it's the guys that hang around the flgs constantly that fit this stereotype.
If you're a normal, sane, good-smelling human being, you can generally find a group.
If not, you have to hang around the store and harass employees who can't leave.

>>53826667
>>53826376
Recess, you dumb motherfuckers.

>>53834715
>recess
>every hour or so
I think those two thought it out more than you did

>>53793390
>>>53826544
>Or the gay guy with boundary issues who doesn't get that the other guys might not want dick.


I had a person like that, except he would hit on all the male players. He tried it with me and I would tell him to back off repeatedly. Finally lost it and told him no one in the group is gay and even there was, they wouldn't be fucking a greasy sea cow with a neck beard.

Never showed up to our group ever again.

>>53834768
Dunno about where you went to school, but elementary in Canada had a 15 minute recess every hour and a half with 45 minutes for lunch in the middle.
High school had a 10 minute break after every period with an hour for lunch.
Seems pretty standard to me.

>>53834919
What the fuck? I've never heard of being so generous with recess.
Where I went to school, in the USA, we only had recess in K-12. Kindergarteners through I think 4th graders had two recesses a day and 5-8th graders only had one. The high school I went to was pretty fucked up in terms of timing but all we had was lunch in the middle of the day.
Goddamn

>>53834955
That might explain all the school shootings.

>>53834955
It makes the school day slightly longer, but it apparently helps kids retain the information they learn by giving them breaks to decompress and not get overwhelmed.

>>53835044
Oh, no, yeah, I know all about the benefits and things. But the American pediatrics association has also been saying for ages that high schoolers should be waking up later for school because they're apparently supposed to be sleeping later at that age, but that never stopped my high school from changing anything anyway. I don't think they prioritize student health enough in schools.

>mfw everytime high schoolers were depicted in American series they started at 9 and left at 3pm.
>mfw I started at 8am and often left at 6pm.

>>53795832
Include me in the cap reddit

>>53834919
>10 minute break after every period
Is that how they do it now? Because I remember it was only ever 5 minutes to get between classrooms and take a piss if you were fast about it.

>>53837584
At my school it was technically "five minute break, five minutes to get to your next class", but it worked out to be "go outside and smoke for 9 minutes, then sprint your ass to class."

>>53837584
>>53839466
Mind you, that was 10+ years ago now, so who the fuck knows.

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>>53809887

> That said, anyone copying Old Man Henderson isn't worth my time either way, especially the people who still unironically believe it was a true story.

Logically, I know it's fictional, but emotionally, I want to believe.

>>53809887
I mean lets be honest if theres a game you don't like you dont just go in and be an retard fuck and destroy the game

Especially in a horror game its a big no-no to be a retard clown
Also the Keeper should never allow a soldier character with automatic shotguns (except if delta green)

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>>53795832
>I will not tolerate outright weirdos.
Enjoy rat poison

>>53794233
I'll keep my phone, you can have my keys though :D

the fuck is Hardware Store?

>>53845272
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q16yI2d9sNE

>>53805961
every hour is perfect. keeps the smokers from whining to much, lets the dm organize encounters and such. feeding babies (babies are the worst.)

>>53807223
LMAO

>>53845337
You monster...

Thankfully I've had decent luck with people I bring to the table. A bit too much autism for my taste, but the worst it gets is a few of them using meta knowledge that their characters shouldn't have. Or just a lot of people bumping heads because everyone thinks they should be leading, instead of working together.

>>53816886
A lot of people with mental disabilities have trouble with hygiene. This also includes people with mental disorders such as schizophrenia and major depression

>>53818504
i kno it makes you sad but heck if they are all engaged sounds like decent (if autistic) ADD coping mechanism to me

>tfw still never actually played an actual RPG
>tfw don't know whether or not I'd be a disliked guy
I probably would be hated, so I'd rather just not try.

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>>53849901
>admitting to never playing an RPG
>on /tg/

>>53849989
At least a fifth of the people here are only here because they like sci-fi and fantasy, I'd estimate.

>>53850003
Another fifth is here only because they like the funny may-mays about That Guy and nat 20s. Another fifth hasn't played RPGs or wargames since their high school days 10 or 20 years ago.

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>>53849989
You know we do CCGs and Miniatures Games too, right?

>>53845337
An autism moment, but at 43 seconds in, but am I the only one who noticed this guy is excited about a hardware store opening in his small town though it's big enough to support public transit?

>>53806080
>"I'm not a cancerous mass"
Kill yourself, in game or otherwise.

>>53807163
Either you have been going with the best bait ive seen, or you are literaly the most petulent and petty asswipe of an anon ive seen in a long long time.

>>53849843
I was mostly just confused and worried, which is why I posted it here. I've never heard of anybody else in a similar situation though

>>53794233
Phones fucking ruin gaming. There's nothing more distracting than your opponent whipping out his phone to respond to a text message as you're trying to play. It's not looking up rules or checking what your opponents models can do, it's literally texting friends.

At that point why the fuck am I playing with you? Just fuck off with your friends.

>>53845337
automatic circumcisors?

>>53854214
Snip snip.

Automatic circumcisors - half off!

>>53854299
i just work for tips