I haven't paid any attention to 40K in about three years,

I would tell you we Age of Emperor now, but three years is long enough you wouldn't really know what Age of Sigmar is.
In other words: Much has changed, little of it was for the better.

>>52973245

Disregard this fool. Much has changed, the story is moving again, and we're getting an update on the rules that will cut out a lot of bloat.

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>>52973211
Phew man there's a lot. I got into 40k about a year ago so I can't fill you in on all three years, but basically look up "Gathering Storm" and you'll get an idea. Bullet points:

-Magnus the Red has two new models, one daemon prince and one Horus Heresy
-Ahzek Ahriman and his band returned to Magnus
-Magnus lead an assault on Fenris and wiped it off the map
-Magnus used the deaths of almost everyone on Fenris to recreate Prospero
-Cadia blew up during Abaadon's 13th Black Crusade
-Trazyin the Infinite (Necron lord who likes to collect shit) fucked around on Cadia before it blew up
-Because Cadia blew up, the Warp is slowly overtaking the rest of realspace
-On Cadia, Saint Celestine fought Abaddon and almost killed him, turned mortal in the process
-Abbadon heard the name of someone the Grey Knights have in a stasis pod, blew a gasket but we don't know the name
-Commoragh is in the process of blowing up because the Gate underneath it opened up
-the Mechanicum asked the Dark Eldar how to fix the Golden Throne (this was before Gathering Storm)
-Ynnead is the Eldar God of Death who is supposed to eat Slaanesh
-Ynnead was awoken early and not quite finished, the Avatar named Yncarne is running around
-his cult leader is a chick named Yvraine
-Biel-Tan fractured and pretty much blew up when Yncarne woke
-Eldar and Dark Eldar are teamed up now
-Eldar and Dark Eldar got their names changed to "Aeldari" for copyright reasons
-Yvraine fucked with Ahriman by restoring some of the Rubrics, before blasting a hole in the Webway they were in and throwing them all into the void immediately
-there are Genestealers on Terra
-Guilliman apparently had a guy named Cawl from the Mechanicum build him a life-support suit of power armor before he was put into stasis
-Cawl, Cypher, and Yvraine go to Macragge as the Black Legion attacks
-manage to get Guilliman into the suit of armor
-Guilliman starts wrecking the Black Legion's shit
(cont)

>>52973605

Disregard this shill faggot. The new '''''storylines''''' are fanfic-tier bad. You know when back in the day you'd see a topic on a 40k forum like "How would you add to the 40k storyline?" and you'd get all these diahorrea-inducing ideas from teenaged cringelords? The new plot lines are pretty much that bad. Almost Draigo bad.

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>>52973750
(cont)
-Guilliman has an existential crisis after realizing what the Imperium has become
-Guilliman decides to go to Terra to talk to daddy
-on the way he's abducted several times by a bunch of different guys
-eventually fights with Magnus
-with help Guilliman forces Magnus into a dead-end of the Webway and cuts it off, leaving Magnus stuck for all eternity
(at least until GW decides otherwise)
-when they get to Terra Cypher is arrested but escapes
-Guilliman is let into the throne room and stays in there for three days, nobody knows what happened
-comes out with daddy's fire sword and is going to make the Imperium great again
-also Baal is under attack right now by an entire Tyranid hive fleet and a host of Khorne
-Mortarion's got a new model and there's hints of a plague marine vs space marines box soon

I probably missed a lot of shit but that's more than anyone else provided. GW swears up and down it's not the End Times, though, so there's that.

>>52973799
Disregard this whiner. No one said that the story was GOOD, just that it was moving, which means new models coming out. And the new rule teases HAVE been good (with a few exceptions). We know a fair amount, but some of the largest changes are:
-No more Formations. Instead there will be 14 different FOCs at launch, which all factions can access
-AP is now an armor-save modifier
-Initiative is gone, always hit first on the charge
-Vehicles now act like monstrous creatures

>>52973799
The plot lines are Shit, but the Moments connecting to them? Robot's criticism of the Imperium and actions following them are nothing if not thought-provoking.

>>52973750
The eldar uniting is the most shocking to me

>>52973838
That model...Really is fucking horrible.

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>>52973931
Yeah that is a pretty big shock. Pic related is the Horus Heresy Magnus. I also have a pic of a more in-depth plot summary of Gathering Storm, I'll post that in a second.

>>52974009
Something about the models lately. They've been shit.

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>>52974062
Also got a couple imgur albums of the White Dwarf leaks that showed of Guilliman:
http://imgur.com/a/rUBWQ
http://imgur.com/a/PaiKx

I'd browse the Horus Heresy and 40k generals if you want to know more. I'm sure they wouldn't mind a few a questions either.

And this guy is a good source of up-to-date news on 40k stuff happening:
http://natfka.blogspot.com/

>>52973931
Its not every single dark eldar and eldar, just a large number. Eldrad tried to hurry along the ynnead prophecy and was thwarted by the death watch, Lelith kills yvraine and she resurrects, kicking off mass destruction in commoragh. Which pisses off vect and the haemonculi

>>52973838

What book is all the Eldar and Guilliman stuff in?

>>52975603
Gathering Storm, it's three books.

>>52975777

I've only seen the Cadia book.

Anyone have scans?