>http://basement.warehouse23.com/bo x/ Open a box and te

>>52956216
> A series of memos from NASA to Richard Nixon, charting the progress of the Mars settlement from 1972 to present, through the establishment of a temporary and semi-permanent bases, including the current "permanent, independent, self-sustaining" base. Arrangements are made to take him there, and a memo is dispatched to him, dated two days after his death, about initiating "...stage two of the project."

Well, that is interesting.

>>52956523
>A tube of ointment marked "Hair Remover" in oddly spelled French and German. It works perfectly and permanently; if it's applied to the skin, the hair will melt away instantly and will never, ever grow there again. The ointment is green and minty-smelling, acid-tasting if eaten but nontoxic.

Best Hair remover in the world. Use it to prank the local king 10/10

>>52956216
>A human skeleton. The ankle bones are fused in a manner that will keep the toes pointed. The head is normal-sized but appears grotesquely small in comparison to the body, which is nearly 8 feet tall. Other pink boxes hold a myriad of high-fashion clothing sized to fit.

Some kind of high-class mutant species. I predict this is some elf-like strain of humanity that attempted to genetically and culturally engineer itself the ultimate bourgeois society.

>>52956216

>An ordinary office stapler containing extraordinary staples. They could staple together two sheets of 1/16" steel, but refuse to perforate paper.

Ahahahaha, it's ORIGAMI IRON GOLEM time!

>>52956216

>A modern-day roleplaying game in which players take the parts of everyday people. Careful reading will tend to indicate the book was written on Tolkien's Middle Earth.

Well, THAT would be fun to use.

>>52956216

> A cube of concrete, exactly pi feet per side. It is intelligent and telepathic (power 5, telesend 15, telereceive 15). It's personality is dead boring to anyone who isn't fanatical about Euclidian geometry, however. The block has this skill at level 30. Note that it *is* just a block of concrete otherwise - taking it apart down to the quantum level reveals nothing unusual.

I bet this fucker is responsible for the wormhole tech the bad guys keep using.

>>52956729

...

I'm going in.

>>52956216

> A small opaque glass vial that reads, "Imperial Space Marine Emergency Suicide Kit: Break if captured." It contains a bit of waxy paper, on which is written READ THE FOLLOWING ALOUD: "HASTUR, HASTUR, HASTUR"

Jesus. This is, like, 6 different /tg/ memes in one item.

>>52956216
>A small, gray ring with a flat surface on top. It turns briefly red and blinks if a flame is detected within ten meters. Tapping the flat surface of the ring engulfs a 20-meter radius in a 1/10th second duration force field. Within the force field, all atmosphere is removed completely. The wearer is protected for an additional 1/10th second - enough to ride out the violent implosion when the force field dissipates. Inscribed inside the ring is "Help stamp out smoking."

I... I guess I'm gonna stamp out smoking. And smokers.

>>52956729

The problem here is that I'm imagining LOTR characters roleplaying on our earth

>No Gimli, she's not a blonde elfin chick wearing white, stop this tecnological realm bullshit right now

>>52956216
Hey, there's a dumpster, too. Let's open it up and see what-

>A science book describing the intestines as part of the parietal lobe. Deeper investigation suggests that the less material you consume, the louder your apprehension of time. Eventually, the more you consume - the more gastrointestinal stangulation of circulatory fluidity emphasizes the 1's to take 0 places during mental function notion over time!

WAT

>A pair of chrome-plated .44 Magnum revolvers in a velvet-lined wooden case. Inlaid on the case lid, and carved into the pistols' ivory handles, is the personal coat of arms of Richard the Lionhearted.

Welp, the Gunslinger in my pathfinder campaign is going to be happy.

>>52956216
>Open a box and tell us how you would incorporate its contents into your campaign.

>A small opaque glass vial that reads, "Imperial Space Marine Emergency Suicide Kit: Break if captured." It contains a bit of waxy paper, on which is written READ THE FOLLOWING ALOUD: "HASTUR, HASTUR, HASTUR"

Just another typical session in Death Watch...

>>52956216
>A complete library of the classics of Orcish literature. Surprisingly, it is quite large, and contains works that rival the greatest poets, playwrights, novelists, and philosophers of history. Reading the entire library will reveal that orcs have a complex philosophy regarding war, and write romances of such great passion and purity that elves look shallow in comparison. Several non-fiction texts indicate that orcs possess great artistic skill, advanced diplomacy, well-developed and reasonable religion, and high levels of technical development. All the books are stamped "SUPPRESS AND TERMINATE WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE," in both Gothic letters and Elvish runes, in red.

I fail to see how our mission to drown the world in glorious dwarven lava would be even remotely moved by the addition of yet more pansies to burn. Maybe use it to mock the elves some more? Make special mention of how many trees died to print all this stuff?