>Roll some dice >Dice roll off the table >Drop to

>>52649744
this is a reply for you.

>>52649744
>cement floor
>not having carpeting
>not at least having a rug by your table to make it look more homey
Shit decorating desu.

>>52649744
You are exactly why I ask my player 5(Five) one-hand pushups before coming to my table.

Autist like you are automatically filtered

>>52649744
That, and sucking fat GM dick

>>52650949
You are freaked out by the sight of bruises so you try to bully potential players to feel better about yourself?

Oh wow, it's been AT LEAST six months since I've seen a "post a picture of a girl with an injury and claim she's the OP" thread on /tg/.

>>52651000
Or it was a fucking joke and you're too autistic to realize.

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>>52650092
>not embracing the bare-concreted glory of brutalism

>>52651106
You should follow your own advice.

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>>52649744
My flgs has these cheapo folding tables. The underside of the table is pretty much just hell. the connecting supports are all sharp as fuck.

>>52651139
Indeed, really inconsiderate of those who spend most of the session under the table...

>>52649744

Deep vein thrombosis are bigger worries.

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>>52651160
Right? Eating all the crumbs and the dead roaches off the floor is a valuable public service to the store.

>>52651139
Jackasses keep putting chewing gum on the underside of these things. I hate having to lift them!

>>52649744
>year 2k17
>not using a dice app

What are you, Amish?

>>52649744
>drop on one knee
>hurt your knee in the process
Are your motor skills that impaired or you that fat, that you can't land your knee on the floor without hurting yourself?

>>52650092
>Carpeting
Hello, the 70s called.

That's why I trained my falcon to pick dice that drop to the floor. Also, it serves to bypass the no-singles rule at my LFGS.

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>>52651436
>>52651340
>>52651160
>>52651139
Not using a proper table.
Do you even Catan?

How compacted is your cement that it's giving you cuts and bruises? Powder shouldn't be that rough.

>Play a cleric

This is why I wear kneepads while gaming.

>>52651743
>>52651569
>>52651495
How new are you retards

>>52650092
Carpeting.. Lol that's a good one. Welcome to the 2000's

>>52650949
Because everyone knows the amount of pushups you can do with one arm has direct correlation to how autistic you are.

>>52651106
In order to be a joke, there has to be either a punchline, or at least some humour involved. The thread detects neither.

>>52651495
Not knowing that dice apps improperly simulate randomness and thinking that they are a valid option. Ha. HAHAHA.

>>52651743
Lol *sees what you did there*

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>>52650949
That'll just net you autists with retard strength, which is worse because at least before the autists were mostly impotent.

The true methot is you use an anal speculum to spread the player candidate's ass until it rips. Anyone who utters a sound through the entire process or objects is autistic, and can therefore be safely ejected from the table.

>>52653828
Not knowing that physical dice can favor certain value based off of miniscule imperfections that most companies won't catch before being shipped. Ha. HAHAHA.

>>52650995

I wish I could suck DM dick.

>>52650949
Does working out actually make your knees hurt less?

>>52651122
Is that the apartment building from GATTACA?

>>52649744
>roll dice
>dice are kept within the confinements of a dice tray at the base of a dice tower I built myself.

This is why I'm paid the big bucks.

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>>52651705
>just faintly remembering this pasta after a solid year of forgetting about it

Thanks man.

>>52653885
>>52650949
These methods are all nonsense.

We know Autism is a mental disorder. All I do is simply perform basic lobotomy on new players. They can have their brain bits back in a jar after the sessions over, that way they can go back to being autistic whenever they want.

None of them have chosen that so far so I think I'm helping them a lot :)