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My players met a lich who promised to enchant their weapons if

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My players met a lich who promised to enchant their weapons if he was allowed to cast a spell that let part of his soul latch onto one of the players. The lich told then to throw their weapons in a nearby hole and their weapons would be enchanted the next day. They agreed with no question. Are my players retarded /tg/?
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>>52524662
Jesus fucking christ
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>>52524682
Fpbp.
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>>52524662
Typical western DnD-esque setting? Yes they are.
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>>52524662
>Are my players retarded /tg/?
yes
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>>52524662
You should have the lich undo the spell since they're retarded and decide to enchant their weapons out of pity
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>>52524662
Punish them for this OP. Teach them a lesson in trusting evil.

Or actually do it because fuck it, it'll be interesting to DM.
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>>52524662
I don't have a reaction image with a high enough power level to do this justice.
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>>52524662
...yes. Yes they are. Unless you are playing an all evil campaign and they wanted the lich as their patron, in which case good job.
They players did know that it was a lich, right?
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That's fucking hilarious if true OP
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>>52524662
I choose not to believe you. Even normalfags aren't this naive.
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>>52524745
Yes it wasn't even implied. It was stated. And it's not a strictly evil campaign. One of them is lawful good.
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>>52524662
Meh, a new weapon is 75GP at most.
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>>52524821
I think the concern is less about the monetary value, and more that they willingly disarmed themselves at the request of a lich that also wants to put his ectoplasm all over their souljuice.
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>>52524784
>>52524790
For those that don't believe.
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>>52524662
I play D&D as a skeleton so meh
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>>52524899
Son of a bitch.
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>>52524662
Give them the full load, bruh. Make them suffer for being so incredibly stupid. Let the lich kick their unarmed asses. Make sure to rub it in, by having the lich say something among the lines of "I was just messing with you, I didn't think you'd ACTUALLY be this stupid! It must be my lucky day!".
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>>52524920
>In my defence

You're still retarded. It's not about weapons, you have a lich leeching off your soul.
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>>52524920
I can't believe it's real!

ahahahaahahahahahahaha

You fucking retards!!
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The lich should change his plan and actually try to employ these possibly useful idiots.
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>>52525042
Wait, that wasn't the plan?
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>>52524662
I DEMAND YOU TELL USE OF THEIR ENRAGED FACES AFTERWARDS. ALSO SZECHUAN SAUCE.
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I dont see how this situation is much different from an hour long extended cut version of "rocks fall, you die." Best case scenario, if it wasn't an evil campaign before, it is now.
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>>52525085
>t. butthurt retard
Why would you trust an obviously evil lich?
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>>52525042
>these mortal fools are a riot
>let's give them some errands to do
>I employ them only because I pity them, and not because I'm a 500 years old, sad and lonely abomination, who actually find them endearing
>I said it's not that I like them or something, b-b-baka
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>>52525119
of course, i wouldn't, you wouldn't, but now that not just one, but every player has committed to drinking the koolaid, where the fuck do you take the story? roll up new chars idiots, lets try again? meh
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>>52524662
Well, did the Lich enchant the weapons or not, OP?
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>>52525258
>Well, did the Lich enchant the weapons or not, OP?
This is the important question here.

If it's stupid and it works, then it isn't stupid.
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Update: the lich will enchant their weapons. Thede weapons will immediately teleport then into some extraplanar hellscape with only the lich's psychic taunting to guide them through their task.

Any better ideas or additions?
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>>52525436
>If it's stupid and it works, then it isn't stupid.
yeah i mean if you light yourself on fire you'll never be cold for the rest of your life, right?
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>>52525676
If you light yourself on fire and die, that's the equivalent of the Lich not enchanting your weapons.
If you light yourself on fire and survive unscathed and warm, that's the equivalent of the Lich enchanting your weapons.
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>>52525704
Lighting yourself on fire is a a stupid decision regardless of outcome.
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>>52524662

This is an opportunity OP.

Go full ONE RING TO RULE THEM ALL on them.
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>>52525676
If fire deals 1d6 a round, and I ignore the first 10 points of fire damage from any given source, then setting myself on fire is pretty sweet.
I've played low level characters before where my entire combat routine was "douse self in oil, apply match, grapple enemies to flaming death".
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>>52524662

Good question. Better question is whether you think punishing them in a harsh way will end well for you.

That said, here's what I would do. The lich has the ability to bind pieces of his souls to things? Have him bind pieces of his soul to their weapons.

On the outside, they are great. They are magical, hard to break, they even seem to grow stronger with enough killing. The only problem is that they are feeding raw soul power straight to the lich.

In the end, use the devoured souls to add personality to the lich and flavor to a boss fight.
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>>52525497
>Any better ideas or additions?
the task must be sisyphean in nature. the campaign ends when the players figure out they're stuck in hell forever with no chance to escape. you, as the dm, must never tell them this and must always use the lich's taunting to focus the group's goals. never let them lose hope, but never let them win.
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>>52525497
The Lich is stunned for at least 3whole minutes. He just stares at the party, his face flashing a mix between shock, amusement, and confusion. Then he just leaves, he teleports away after saying something like "I'm gonna need a few decades to process this, goodbye, I guess."
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>>52525779
>>52525497

This.
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>>52525497
>>52525766

They're in the layer of hell where Orcus is. The Lich wants Orcus destroyed, and then have himself take power.

The players of course, then become his slave generals.
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>>52525785
seconding
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>>52525497
Give them ridicilous over the top laser beam weapons and set it up to backfire. I actually did this one.
>Player is frustated that his character is useless
>He finds a soulstealing sword wich instagibs over 90% of what they can encouter
> It also can shoot laser beams charged by souls
>Problem is, everything comes back as a unkillable semi intelligent zombie who want its soul back
>Only thing wich sets the zombies dormant is to get ahold of the sword/get it stuck in the corpse
>Player gets super paranoid about getting his face eaten while sleeping
>Only kills 2 persons with it, throwing there angry corpses down a cliff and calls it a day
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>>52525747
There's somebody who would disagree with you.
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Give them retarded, as in silly not dumb hard, handicaps like you can only travel by hopping on one leg.
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>>52524662
Top fucking kek.

Pic related for them.
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>>52525239
Yes you fucktard. Actions have consequences, do something that retarded - get rekt.
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>>52524662
Anyone got the pasta with the demon sealed by swords? I'd say thats somewhat relevant.
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>>52524920
Goddammit, he sounds just like one of my players trying to rationalize banging a succubus after passing the Spot check.
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>>52524662
pic related is OP's players minus the qt factor
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>>52529014
I would probably bang a succubus. Its worth the risk.
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>>52529014
>>52531774
Exactly. How many opportunities are you going to get to bang a succubus. Go for it and count on your comrades to keep you from losing your soul afterwards.
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>>52529014
Did he die?
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>>52524662
>>52524662
>let part of his soul latch onto one of the players.
HOLY FUCK OP, IT MIGHT COME AS A SURPRISE BUT IT IS YOU WHO ART THE RETARD.

LOOK UP THE TERM LICHTHRALL YOU DUMB FUCK, BECAUSE THAT IS LITERALLY WHAT YOU ARE DESCRIBING TO THEM.

>Lich offers to turn a PC into a Lichthrall in return for enchanted gear which may be enchanted using souls per BOVD rules
>Not a decent offer at the behests of quests hooks provided through the player of choice's Lichthralldom, and potential death knighthood, or better deeper lore-based quests to errand run for the Lich to places people wouldn't normally visit without high lore checks or legend lore

Grats OP, once again I have to post and shittalk you because the world is full of low-level necromancy knowledge DM plebs.

STUPID FUCKING NU-DM
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>>52532347
It was a trick you goof.
The lich just convinced OP's retarded players to get rid of their weapons and basically become defenseless.
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>>52532372
>>52532347
>>52524662
Now hang on, this could be good, have the litch talk to them in their minds, constantly, you can steer the game now as dm by vaguely annoying remarks.

Also poke fun at them, the one hot chick? Whenever she undresses he whistles and such. Everybody hate him after a few weeks. But they cant get rid of him because hes latched onto their souls.
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>>52532347
Now you are the retard, because you are assuming he didn't think of any of this.

The question asked was if the players are retarded for accepting this, no questions asked, and the answer is yes.

The hypothetical said nothing about the liches actual intentions or the consequences there-of.
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>>52532347
>being this retarded
Unless you were baiting, if so good luck.
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>>52525497
Instead of this which completely removes agency temporarily, set something else that still punishes them for their actions but doesn't make them the bitchboy of some Lich. The main reason you don't want to do that is because, even though your players are fucking retarded, nobody likes having to do menial shit for someone who "outwitted" them. Keep your players happy and they won't start murderhoboing your story away.

What you do is this:
>Give the players their weapons
>Have them be verry good
>Slowly transform them into something more akin to the Lich or whatever it looked like before it became a Lich
>Vary the effects of these changes based on how horrifying/magical realm you want it to be
>If you're going for horrifying, have beneficial but still very alarming things change, like no longer needing to breathe, or having your eyes start glowing blue, giving darkvision
>The further the characters allow these changes to go, the worse they can get, such as skin sloughing off revealing only bone, or horrible afflictions appearing across their body
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>>52524662
>PCs do something out of greed
Seems like every other group I ever met: stupid as fuck.
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>>52524662
They're not retarded, OP. If they were, they would be murderhobos.
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>>52532243
Its exactly this sort of thing that leads to amusing adventures. A group of adventurers who are incredibly paranoid and say no to every opportunity will often have a boring game. Even in reference to the OP, the adventurers being dumb as fuck and accepting the Lich's offer develops the narrative further and makes for an amusing story.
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>>52532503
>Seems like every other group I ever met: stupid as fuck.
You should met more groups.
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>>52524920
Pic related.

>>52529014
A succubus is at least understandable.
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>>52532372
>>52532426
>>52532439
DOESN'T EXCUSE THE FACT THE DM DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT LICHTRHALLS, VASSALICHES, DRY LICHES, DEFILER LICHES, ELEMENTAL LICHES, DROWLICHES, PSIONIC LICHES, SHADOW LICHES, LICHFIENDS, BAELNORMS, GOOD LICHES, ARCHLICHES, ALHOONS/ILLITHLICHES, BANELICHES, SUEL LICHES, FIRELICHES, SPONTANIOUS LICHES, AND SPELLJAMMER LICHES, AND I THINK THAT'S ALL THE LICHES, EXCEPT FOR THE YET-UNCONFIRMED MUMMY LICHES.

OP IS STILL A MISLEADING NON-LORE FUCK WHO DOESN'T GIVE OUT NEGATIVE ENERGY CORRUPTION, APPROPRIATE ALIGNMENT ADJUSTMENT, ROLLS ON VARIED EVIL IS A COSMIC FORCE TABLES FOR THE CHOICES THE PLAYERS MADE OR TOMB-TAINTED SOULS

I BET THIS FAGGOT DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT A MORTIMER IS.

NOW SHUT YOUR FUCKING WHORE MOUTHS

>>52532500
THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT HAPPENS WITH A FOREIGN SCHOOL OF NECROMANCY MADE VARIANT IN UNEARTHED ARCANA EXPANDED UPON WITH THE PALE MASTER, MORTIMER, TOMB-TAINTED SOUL USERS, HAS HAPPENED TO ORCUS BECAUSE OF HIS SURVIVAL POST TENNEBROUS, AND MUCH, MUCH MORE, AND IS THE EXACT DESCRIPTION OF LICHTHRALLS.
>>
Report and ignore
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>>52532533
NOW THEN, THE LICH PUTS A BIT OF HIS SOUL IN SOMEONE TO TURN THEM INTO A LICHTHRALL? GREAT, NOW HE'S CORRUPTED WITH NEGATIVE ENERGY OR IS AT LEAST, SHOWING THE SIGNS OF PROGRESSING TAINT, AS THERE ARE MANY WAYS THIS MANIFESTS AND WORKS BASED ON CONDUIT AND PROXIMITY TO LITERALLY THE FORCE OF DEATH THAT PASSES THROUGH ALL LIVING THINGS ON IT'S KNOWN EXPIRY MADE MANIFEST A FEW THOUSAND TIMES OVER.

BUT WAIT

YOU STILL FUCKED UP

THE ONLY WAY TO DO THIS IS TO HAVE AN EPIC-LEVEL SPELL OWNED BY A FAT FUCKING NETHERSE LICH THAT IS LITERALLY NON-PRESENT JUST ABOUT EVERYWHERE ELSE IN EVERY PLANE SETTING AND LOCATION IN DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS, CUSTOM SETTING OR NOT, THEN USING THE SPLIT PIECE THROUGH A GEASS, BINDING OR EASILY DONE SURGICAL PROCEDURE BECAUSE OF THE LICH'S PARALYSIS TOUCH

FUCKING SUB NORMAL HALFWIT.
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>>52524662
Well at least the monk and sorcerrer had their time to shine.
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>>52532533
>>52532578
Mr Rage is a cringeworthy relic of /tg/'s past.
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>>52532533
>>52532578
And again, you assume OP didn't know any of this.

All he asked is if his players were retarded, and the answer is still yes.

where-in does it say he doesn't have this knowledge? even for the sake of argument, you are assuming far too much.
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>>52532578
SO NOW, TO FIX YOUR FUCK UP WHICH YOU WILL APOLOGIZE TO YOUR PLAYERS FOR LONG AFTER THIS HAS BLOWN OVER YOU HAVE TO

>BUMP THE LICH UP TO EPIC LEVEL
>PROVIDED ENCHANTED GEAR WHICH MAY OR MAY NOT BE CURSED, OR A DOUBLE EDGED BLADE SO TO SPEAK
>ROLL UP WHAT ITEMS GET ENCHANTED IN A GOOD MANNER AND WHAT ITEMS ARE ENCHANTED IN A BAD MANNER
>READ UP ON EVIL FORMS OF CRAFTING, ESPECIALLY THE BOVD

PUTTING UP WITH YOU FUCKING 4E-5E BABE'S IS THE FUCKING WORST, YOU'RE WORSE THAN A THOUSAND NECROTIC CYSTIC HEMORRHOIDS ON NERULLS ACTIONLESS ANUS.
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>>52532578
>>52532533
And they call me autistic.
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>>52532615
You are not Mr. Rage, no matter how hard you pretend.
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>>52532578
>Everyone else on the ground screaming.
>shes just trying to deliver the mail.
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>>52532615
That's not Mr Rage, he was funny
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>>52532615
Post more orcus pls.
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>>52532615
>>52532578
>>52532533
I haven't seen a bigger idiot in weeks.
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>>52525239
Them taking the retarded ass bait doesnt' mean it's time for "Rocks fall, everyone roll up new characters."
These idiot players have handed the GM a plot hook on a silver platter, they took the most obvious bait around. The consequences should be slow, the Lich should help them in the beginning, manipulate their goals into serving the Lich, until it's too late and they have to work to undo all of the stupid they caused.
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>>52532533
How in the world do you forget dracoliches? Shame.
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>>52524662
>>52525497
OP, you've got material for an entire campaign on a platter here.

Suggestion: The lich is shocked by how gullible the PCs are and honors his end of the bargain. If he can trick them into giving up one soul for +1 weapons, they're power-hungry and/or stupid enough to sell the souls of their own king for a legendary suit of armor.

Being teleported to the hellscape should be part of the deal, and it should have a clear purpose that advances the lich's agenda. Make them think they're outsmarting the lich and getting the better end of the deal when in reality they're getting played like fools. Have their companion's corrupted soul threaten his life if the party refuses or turns on the lich.
Show them the consequences of supporting the local embodiment of evil. Give them a chance to ally with the forces of good and fight back, or willingly become the lich's evil soulless thralls for an evil campaign.
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>>52524920
Adam, you are retarded.
Zombie wizard is now attached to your soul, corrupting and eating you.

And guess what, you're a phylactery now. Anyone, say super tough paladin who wants to kill the lich, will now slap your shit because he needs to kill you in order to destroy the lich. Doesn't matter if you're good, he's doing a greater good for killing you.
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>>52534457
well. I mean. Being retarded enough to literally sell your soul to an undead "devil" is generally tantamount to shifting alignment to evil in and of itself, so i don't think the paladin would even think of you as a speedbump.
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>>52524662
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>>52525085
>the pirate lord promises you that if you leave your wealth on a nearby island, and go back to the dock, a water elemental will take your treasure and double it
Get shocked when the pirate lord sails out to the island and steals it.

>Giant dragon-worm tells you that its mouth is a portal to the past, foolish samurai
Get shocked when the bastard just tried to eat you.

>The bank tells you that your money will be well invested in this bank
Get shocked when it was all a scam.
>>
>>52532347
It sucks that you're this retarded, because I really wanted to insult you a little more, but I realize it would probably just be a waste of keystrokes.
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>>52532605
>Mr Rage is a cringeworthy relic of /tg/'s past.
MR RAGE was also intelligent, clever, and helpful. This faggot just has his capslock stuck on.
>>
Update: my rogue has become self aware.
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>>52535349
Kek
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>>52532615
next time press the power switch instead of capslock, you'll save us all some time
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>>52534609
>>Giant dragon-worm tells you that its mouth is a portal to the past, foolish samurai
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>>52535349
Seriously, let them have this.

Let the lich chew them out for being retards, but the lich will enchant their weapons, because he promised.
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>>52525497
Nah, that's boring. The lich will obviously keep his end of the bargain, but now he can dominate the volunteering PC at will with no save, and will use the ability at the worst possible moment to achieve his own goals. And he'll obviously take over the said PC's body if his own is ever destroyed.
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>>52525747
Once I played a security officer on a space station, and hostile alien creature injected me with cryogenic toxin, expecting me to freeze to death. I doused myself (both of us, actually) with some fuel, then proceeded to light a cigar. Worked like a charm.
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>>52540595
FUCK
LINGS
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>>52524662
Looks like it's Game Over for this party.

What are you waiting for? Just tell them to roll new characters.
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>>52540595
Shit was this valid?
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>>52540897
What sort of fucking shitcurity carries welding fuel?
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>>52540897
Better then freezing like a bitch.
Welding fuel mixed into the pepper spray, easily made and very handy. Forcing the enemy in a prolonged fight to stop, drop and roll or burn, crossing low temperature zones, crowd controlling (boy, does it control crowds!) or interrogating - whatever you need, you can solve it with more fire.
I haven't played for about two years, though. Maybe sprays were nerfed since and would not accept anything but capsaicin. Happened before.
>>52540965
Effective one. I sucked at open combat, but made a decent officer by being prepared and paying attention to what's going on around me. Most players are stupid, blind and think that you are stupid and blind too.
And no, I do not play to win. I know when to throw a fight and accept your death for the sake of the story. I understand that catching all the antags in the first fifteen minutes does not make a fun round, and it is the security's job to maintain the balance. But I prefer to be in control, being able to turn the tide if I decide it would be better to do so.
But when yet undetected ling just brainlessly keeps stabbing you without saying a word while you detain him for two fucking minutes (or maybe just for a harsh talk) for some minor crime, well, just fuck this guy.
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This is going in the suicidal PC hall of fame.
http://archive.4plebs.org/tg/thread/51339555
http://archive.4plebs.org/tg/thread/35583455
>>
>>52524662
Power Word Kill
>>
>>52540965
Space Station 13?

>>52535349
Did the lich say the enchantments were to be positive? Let them get their weapons saddled with random curses, preferably of the "magical garbage" variety.
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>>52542140
>Space Station 13?
No shit. I'd ask what power gay man shithole you were playing on, but I'm 99% sure it was TGstation.
Knowing TGstation shitcurity carries fucking welding fuel to murder with isn't a surprise.
>>
>>52532533
You haven't heard of demiliches? What an inexperienced n00b you are.
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Did I forget to mention one of my players Is a lawful good homebrew angel paladin with an oath of vengence?
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>>52525138
He just wants company and these are the first people to not only give him the time of day but trust him.
>>
>>52524662
>Lich makes promise
>Lich brakes promise
And then the God of Promises destroyed the Lich, and the party needs to figure out how to get their weapons back.

Now here's what really happened
>I was only pretending to be retarded
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>>52524920
>>52524662
I have no reaction image to adequately describe how stupid I think your players are. I am also at a loss for words. All I can do is post a story about a retard and hope it offers you some tiny bit of amusement.
>>
>>52525791
>He just stares at the party, his face flashing a mix between shock, amusement, and confusion.
You mean
>a mix between skull, skull, and skull.
>>
>>52543060
the lich has access to a good number of illusion spells he utilizes when he needs his intentions and emotions properly conveyed

he felt it'd be appropriate to use all of them
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>>52524662
They are, but they've got nothing on my current party. They made their way to a city famed for it's niche market full of eccentric salespeople. They proceed to the local pub, unsubtle like dire bulls in a china shop, asking around about the fanciest shit gold can buy in this place. After a few streetwise checks, they're pointed in the direction of a potion seller. Her stock is far too expensive for them, so they knock her unconscious, steal 90% of her potions (leaving the most valuable stuff, reasoning she'd be less mad if they left some behind), without even the common goddamn decency to steal her gold too.

So they're all 'what the fuck DM?' when a few eccentric mercenaries with names like 'crazy stephan' and 'bottlehead' come around to glass them on behalf of the potion seller EVEN THOUGH THEY STAYED IN THE CITY FOR LONG AFTER THE ROBBERY.

This is the second fucking time they've done this shit too. The first time they cast sleep on a questgiver (who worked for the local government) to steal her magic items. Magic items she promised them for completion of her quest, AFTER THEY ALREADY COMPLETED THE QUEST SHE GAVE THEM. Like at least kill the person you rob, try and tie some loose ends up.
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>>52542575
>paladin
>homebrew snowflake
>retarded
Color me surprised.
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>>52542575
Don't you mean ex-paladin?
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>>52542575
>be paladin
>make a deal with a lich
>don't fall
What the fuck is happening.
>>
>>52544511
5e.
>>
Honestly, falling would be inappropriate here. The God being furiously confused, perhaps, but this doesn't sound like a breach of faith.
>>
>>52525239
>the players must always succeed and shouldn't have to find ways to deal with the bad consequences of their poor decisions

You would not be welcome at my gaming table.
>>
>>52525779
This
>>
>>52544655

There can't be many gods who'd look at this shit and not say "Fuck this, you're done. Don't call on me no mo".
>>
>>52529014
>succubi eat your soul

I hate this meme, according to old historical documents people in the middle ages didn't belive this and succubi just collected the semen of human men and then used it to birth demon spawn.

The whole "succubi will eat your souls kids so don't go sleeping with any demon women!" is some American anti-sex thing that happened in the 50s. Infuriating that this is the most common view of succubi that the mainstream have.
>>
>>52544800
Oh, an enormous castigation is well in order, but not ripping the power out of his soul. A shrivening may be in order too.
>>
>>52534364
damn that's cool, source?
>>
>>52544870
>fucked a succubus
>6 random women sue for child support
>DNA tests confirm paternity
Truly, a fate worse than that.
>>
>>52545774
*than death
>>
>>52534753
>MR RAGE was also intelligent, clever, and helpful.
lmao

no, he really wasn't. He stopped posting because I started calling him out on his bullshit and he literally couldn't handle it.
>>
>>52545908
Yes, he was. He had the best explanation for the Paladin Falling situation I have ever read.
>>
>>52545927
You should read more.
>>
>>52545927
Curious now. Got a screencap?
>>
>>52542140
>Did the lich say the enchantments were to be positive?
The hellscape is a good idea, but you absolutely need to do this. Have him give them a bunch of double edged swords (maybe literally?) Then kick them into hell.

It's a win win for him. Either his enemies in hell get murdered and these retards are stranded there, the party spends all of eternity getting their faces chewed off, some combination of the two, and he has an on demand source of entertainment that he can fuck with. After all, he owns their souls.

I also like the idda of them becoming his phylactery, but I'm not sure if you could fit it in.

Bottom line OP, you've found an amazing group. Don't let them escape.
>>
>>52545946
>>52545954
>>52545927
Not on-hand. He explained the connection between mutual faith and a Paladin's abilities, and his explanation about how the DM can't FORCE a Paladin to fall was quite thoughtful. He explained that a Paladin's abilities in a world like D&D, where gods are present and quantifiable, didn't derive from faith in the traditional Earth sense. The Paladin had to have faith not in the God's existence, but in that the God had goals and standards to which it was worthwhile to adhere. Likewise, the God in question had to be able to trust that the Paladin was acting to the best of their abilities to succeed in whatever goals they themselves were following.

It strongly influenced my depictions of Paladins in my books.
>>
>>52545973
The only way to escape this hell scape is to give the soul of a party member to the liche
>>
The player whose soul is getting tethered to the lich should have his character commit sudoku. Really, there's no excuse for your players being this stupid.
>>
>>52546044
Different guy, but he also expanded on the fact that a paladin did not fall when his faith was tested, or when he lost hope; a paladin only fell when he looked upon his God's edict and proclaimed: "You are wrong."

A paladin can only fall once; be it a paladin of a merciful god executing a man who has already surrendered, or a paladin refusing to strike a being God commanded must die.

It takes power to tell a God 'no'. And all power comes at a price.
>>
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>>52524662

>Ya, just throw ur weapons in this hole, k?
>U can trust me lol

Unless the lich was using some kind of illusion or mind control, or they simply didn't understand that he was a bad guy, I'd say they're dumber than troglodytes.
>>
>>52543021
I was the only person in my school that was friends with the special ed kids, but seriously fuck Fats McGee. Glad to hear the bitch got what was coming to him.
>>
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They trust you, OP. They trust you as their guide on this adventure, and you're there to help them every step of the way.

Stop it. The GM is not your enemy, but he's surely not your friend. Keep track of every decision they make, and then make them pay for each of them. Leave them hanging, make them guess, watch them squirm.
The world is a dangerous place, OP. And it's at your fingertips.
>>
>>52525085
... Because 'rocks fall you die' is when the GM just hamhandedly forces a TPK. And this is nothing like that at all, in any way, shape, or form, since it was up to the PCs to deal with the encounter, and this is how they dealt with it.
>>
>>52545927
Nah. Its quite easily the worst explanation I've seen.

You fall from "losing faith." In other words, an evil dude who is confident is still a fine paladin, and a good dude with strong depression is likely to fall through no fault of his own.

So basically, being the most myopic, selfish, narrow minded paladin possible, being totally unwilling to consider -- even for a moment -- that he might be wrong, is the key to being a paladin.
>>
>>52549541
Hmmm.

>>52546044
HMMMMM.

These two recitations do not quite line up. Anons, care to explain?
>>
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>>52549551
Found it.

It struck me as an attempt to shoehorn the paladin into animu brotagonist. Not that there's anything wrong with the latter, though I'd more envision FEELINGS POWER to be psionics/ardent related.
>>
>>52524790
No, I believe it because I've seen it happen. Remember, it's not that they all individually decided on their own that it would be a good deal. They probably got pushed by the party leader and/or the chattiest player, then a collective herd mentality kicks in.
>>
>>52525119
Because he's had CENTURIES to perfect his sales pitch.

That, and the DM can be rly persuasive, "Ah, but I'm not a bad lich, I'm a good lich!"
>>
>>52532615
Is this some kind of poorly executed grognard false flag attack?
>>
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>>52524790
This shit happens ALL THE TIME in games and DMs have been trying this shit for decades.
>>
>>52528536

Unfortunately no, but I remembered it immediately reading this thread.

I Like to think that this Lich and the demon know each other and are laughing at the stupidity of theirs adventurers.
>>
>>52532347
What sort of third party horseshit is this?
>>
>>52543332
I like the idea of a lich that specializes in enchantment making the players roll a will save every time he wants to convey a different emotion.

>"Okay... you three for some reason think the skull is conveying astonishment"
>"Now just the two of you think it's conveying confusion, and you just see a skull"
>>
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>>52524662
Sadly, yes. I'm afraid it's terminal.
>>
>>52544870
Actually it has to do with the old misconception that release of semen drained vitality.
And while your wife exhausts approximately as fast as you do, the demon just keeps going and going. It is greedy. It wants everything you have to offer, and doesn't care if there is any detriment to you.
>>
There are always trickster monsters like this in my games. It doesn't matter how good they are at it, monsters are always trying to trick my PCs into stupid or evil shit, about every 2 sessions. Its because they talk to EVERYTHING.
>>
>>52549261
>paladin can only fall once;
Explain the atonement spell then?
>>
>>52534457
How about the paladin waits to kill him until he's destroyed his other phylactery, considering a paladin will fucking NEVER find a phylactery?

A guy in armor clanking around is going to be able to find something that could be, at a minimum, anywhere in the world or anywhere on any plane.

A wizard isn't gonna find it either if he casts some anti divination spell either.

Burying it in a coffin in the wilderness or putting it in a safe deposit box in a bank is enough. The shit about how some liches can make 100 phylactery duplicates on 100 different demiplanes is overkill.
>>
>>52534528
Trading your soul to a fiend or whatever makes you evil because they are metaphysically associated with that alignment and they have a deep interest in converting souls to their alignment and a deep attachment to the plane of their alignment, such that they often are reborn on that plane if killed.

No reason that trusting incidentally evil things like hags, liches, chromatic dragons, etc., should automatically make you evil. Evil people go out and harm innocents (or in the case of /tg/ lore, are misunderstood gentle souls who secretly have bad thoughts), being derpy enough to trust a lich isn't at all evil.
>>
>>52537759

>reward players for bad choices instead of teaching them through consequence

Disgusting.
>>
>>52549944
Not having good the Lich enchant their weapons to glow when living things are near.
>>
>>52524662
Don't screw them over this time, but keep trying more bizzare and glaringly obvious traps to test their limits.
>>
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>>52524662
Keep your end of the bargain and enchant the weapons; however, the one with a piece of the lich in him shall be forced to listen to the lich in his mind...while he speaks in Skeletor's voice.
>>
>>52524662

Are they completely new to tabletopping and still wrapping their heads around the fact that it's not a videogame which will bend to serve them at every turn and never present any serious consequences to their actions? If so, go easy on them but make it clear that their mistakes can cost them dearly.

I ask because during my very first campaign, one of my players came fresh from World of Warcraft and ended up murdering a prostitute in a nobleman's guest bed because he didn't want to pay her, and he was then utterly flabbergasted when the city guard came after him. I had to have a good, long talk about action and consequence with him.
>>
>>52534364
Why can't it just be an instance of evil that treats his servants well? Why does most evil seem to want to dick those who work for them?
>inb4 hurr durr evil
>>
>>52550222
In my opinion, the lich tricking the party into believing his missions are harmless or profitable doesn't necessarily mean he treats them badly. As I said, the hellscape should be part of the contract, not a nasty surprise.

I agree with you, honestly. Evil cannot function on a great scale without allies and underlings, and you can't keep those if you stab them in the back like an imbecile.

>Potency (or perhaps rather potentiality), if it is to be exercised and produce results, has to be externalized and so as it were passes, to a greater or less degree, out of one's direct control.
>A man who wishes to exert 'power' must have subjects, who are not himself. But he then depends on them.
>>
>>52525785
>I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream: The DnD

I Like.
>>
>>52544870
By this logic you must hate all the modern fantasy in general, because none of it is how it was in folklore/historically correct superstisions.
>>
>>52524662
Not even a sense motive roll? why they should know liches are evil, that's metagaming. I think the problem is you
>>
>>52542445
Isn't their also a level above Demilich? I forget what it's called, but the Demilich pretty much crumbles to dust and is just a big cloud of near-god like magic and a bunch of floating gems
>>
>>52550766
Undead are categorically evil. Negative energy does that.
>>
>>52549638
>Ah, but I'm not a bad lich, I'm a good lich!'
Well fellas, i see no reason to distrust that guy! Now lets all place our heads in these guilliotines, as a sign of good faith!
>>
>>52551298
1. Wrong. You have Baelnorns and other not evil (some even good) Undeads
2. Thats metagaming, not every dude in that setting would know that
>>
>>52534364
>>52545572

Seconding for source.
>>
>>52550766
Paladin sensed undead evil. Nice commentary on something you weren't there for tho.
>>
>>52549666
Relevant satan trips.
>>
>Be player
>Lich offers to enchant weapons in exchange for laching part of his soul onto me.
>Nod at the other players. It is time. We all agree.
>Lich splits his soul in several pieces and gives us sick ass gear.
>Then gang up on the lich as splitting his soul into too many pieces has left him fragmented and weak.
>Cleanse the remaining soul bits with the help of cleric buddy back in the city.
>World is now a safer placs and I've got some sick ass gear.
>>
>>52524709
How did he put that hat on?

He has no arms.

This picture defies all logic.
>>
>>52545572
>>52551462
https://youtu.be/-Rot9uaVO8s
>>
>>52524662
I got a better one OP
>All the NPCs lie constantly because lolrandumb
>Lie about what players see because lol randumb
>Force players to suffer consequences of not realizing this
>Players lose all trust in the narrative and DM
>Constant skill checks in every situation
>DM cries and complain
>Players force DM to suffer consequences of the bad DMing
>Everybody leaves table and never play with again
>>
>>52551799
Yes, this is what one might think will happen if they're stupid and greedy.
>>
>>52549944
Think about it for a moment.

The lich has now a couple of dumbass followers. What use are these followers to the lich? Nothing. The next dragon, lich, demon or vampire the players run into will convert the players to their side.

The lich will be forced to educate his new peons.

>and this is how you recognize a ponzi scheme. what is it paul?
>i put all my savings in a ponzi scheme, mr. lich!
>that's fine. we'll just grab our magical weapons and kill everyone to get your savings back.
>>
I'd have the lich hang by the hole the next day, and when the players get their weapons, have the lich insist that they are enchanted now, and cut better.

They aren't actually enchanted, but I'd see if the party continues to believe him.

I'd have the lich realize that these people are gullible idiots, and have the lich follow them around, essentially freeloading off of them.

"Heya guys, nice fortress ya got here. Hey, so you don't mind if I crash here a few days, right?? Maybe I could cast a few defensive wards on the place in return..."

Snake oil lich, just keep lying about giving magical benefits to the party members while actually just freeloading.
>>
>>52550027
You say that player actions should have consequences, but what if these consequences make the game unfun for players? I play RPGs on my free time to unwind, not as some morality play where the GM tries to teach a lesson.
>>
>>52552487

Well, obviously it's a balancing act, but I believe that as long as the consequences follow a reasonable train of logic, it only adds to the game. If I murder someone, the police will get involved. If I offend an influential person, it could hurt my social standing. If I enter a game of russian roulette, I could die. Etc etc. This is in the same vein as having positive consequences. If I save the farmer, he might let me live at his farm for a while. If I butter up the influential person, he might open some doors for me. If there aren't consequences, your players just exist in a vacuum of mechanical rules and you might as well be playing Skyrim.
>>
>>52551374
>Thats metagaming, not every dude in that setting would know that
It's pretty common knowledge. Would be DC 10 religion that most undead are hostile to the living, meaning it could be made untrained.
>>
Why the fuck can't our dm give us an out like this? Like a trap that has tpk written all over it so I can fall into it and end this shitty campaign and get my fucking weekends back.

Christ, it'd be like a glowing beacon of hope at this point.
>>
>>52552453
>turns out it's not really a lich
>just a skeleton pretending to be one
>>
>>52551996
I don't think you understand what "lolrandumb" means, you dumbfuck
>>
>>52544800
Not how Paladins work fagtron, especially in 5e
>>
>>52524790
You aren't used to very stupid people, then.
I had players who'd attack targets and hide, hoping the target would just go back to its routine, like some retarded AI in games.
>>
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>>52553711
>>
>>52534364
fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu- that's really cool.
>>
>>52553891
No it means for no good reason you flamingo cuckster
>>
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Here's a question for you folks.

>psion player is almost dragged into someone's mind by psychic honeyed claws while implanting the frivolous suggestion of "wear frilly clothes and high heels" into NPC
>he goes to investigate what's going on by diving into the NPC's mind, and sees a giant web of enchantment magics all woven through it
>Disguising themselves as to fit in, the psion queries some of the avatars of the mind what's going on, and it turns out most of them can't even see the enchantment. Some of the NPC avatars CAN see it, but they are being ignored by the rest of the avatar figments.
>after friendly conversation this particular avatar deduces the psion's an intruder, and grills them about who they are
>Psion finally is lead to the the entity that's hiding in the NPC's mind

>it turns out that this is a clone of BBEG's as a mental construct from a previous campaign, which the psion had previously asked about two sessions ago, and knew the previous BBEG had used mind control, illusion and persuasion to take control of a whole city worth of wizards and kill off all the other leaders before attempting to use a god as a superweapon, and then vanished
>it ALSO turns out that this mental construct that had been intended to mind control the NPC had been unable to do so any more, and the avatar part of the NPC that the psion had thought they were talking to was in fact an illusion controlled by the mental construct and in fact had been the construct's pawn all along and the psion had been utterly bamboozled by them in order to understand them better
>the mental construct literally says his only capablilities is trickery and deceit
>but he also says "he's a good guy really, and can see the psion is also a nice guy"
>asks the psion if he can get a ride out of here
>psion says "sure, just hop into my mind"

Were there sufficient clues that this was Not a Trustworthy Person?
>>
>>52549806
That's just atonement. You can't fall after you've fallen, but you can repent.
>>
>>52532605
>>52545908
>cringe
>n-no you guys I'm such an internet badass I scared a tripfag off over ten thousand years ago
ugh
>>
>>52554651
>not asking for Sense Motive
>>
>>52525497
The lich just stares at them in confusion.

>"To be honest, I didn't expect anyone to actually do it. This is the first time this has happened. I got nothing."
>>
>>52554872
Who, me or the player?
Homebrewed system with very little rolls involved anyway.
>>
>>52555133
Why homebrew for less rolls...?
>>
>>52551963
Guy who posted the webm here, thank you, I had no idea what the source was.

>>52553698
Storytime?
>>
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>>52554651

The GM posted this with the intent of pitching their side of the story, so now it is time for my side of the story.

This is a combat-less, purely investigative and social campaign. We have run through close to three dozen sessions by now.

One of the running themes of the campaign is that nobody is truly malicious, let alone evil. Every single troublemaking NPC we have met so far has proven receptive to civil conversation and being set onto a productive, peaceful path. Usually, this involves opening up to the NPC.

>clone
An interesting choice of word. The NPC was always referred to as a "mental construct," not a clone, not a simulacrum.

>a previous campaign
Which I had not participated in.

>knew the previous BBEG had used mind control, illusion and persuasion to take control of a whole city worth of wizards and kill off all the other leaders before attempting to use a god as a superweapon, and then vanished
This is a flat-out lie. I have run through several searches using the keywords here. My character had received second-hand, obviously-incomplete-sounding information on the mental construct's creator; said creator was made out to be a troublemaker, but the extent of their actions was quite vague. The part about mind control, illusion, persuasion, and killing people is actually new information to me.

>it ALSO turns out that this mental construct that had been intended to mind control the NPC
This was not what was conveyed in-game; what was communicated was that this mental construct was a psychic tutor of sorts, designed to teach by way of psychic transmission. This was not implausible given that my character was well-versed in such psychic techniques.

>the avatar part of the NPC that the psion had thought they were talking to was in fact an illusion controlled by the mental construct
This is actually the subject of another thread I had created previously: >>52528417
>>
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This is me after reading that
>>
>>52556071

>and in fact had been the construct's pawn all along and the psion had been utterly bamboozled by them in order to understand them better
Setting aside the part where the illusion was set up in such a way that it was nearly impossible to distinguish as an illusion, such an act of trickery was hardly a sign of ill intent, particularly considering that *my* character is a good-hearted trickster and that they have befriended other good-hearted trickster NPCs in the past.

>the mental construct literally says his only capablilities is trickery and deceit
My character has also met and befriended a psychic vampire and memory-devourer. By opening up to said NPC, my character was able to befriend and guide the NPC along to a productive path. There was no reason to believe that this new NPC would be more malicious.

>asks the psion if he can get a ride out of here
>psion says "sure, just hop into my mind"
The NPC was the one who had requested to enter my character's mind. My character was not the one who suggested such a course.
>>
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>>52550890
>just a big cloud of near-god like magic and a bunch of floating gems
>>
>>52556071
>>52556145
Fuck you, you're out of the game.
>>
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>>52556071
>>52556145
>>52556570
I love me some /tg/ drama
>>
>>52554540
>For no good reason
>Evil lich
Pick one, cumguzzling cocksucker.
>>
>>52556071
>>52556145
No, no, you're doing it wrong. You're supposed to wait for popular opinion to call either you or me utter idiots and THAT GUY or THAT GM, then later the reversal of surprising information comes to light that splits the opinions of the people reading the thread into two different, bitterly opposed camps, leading to 178 replies and 52 pictures omitted, click reply to view.

>The part about mind control, illusion, persuasion, and killing people is actually new information to me.
I really am sure I mentioned that. Didn't I mention the whole taking over the entire government via assassination, blaming the PCs, starting a war, and generally being a manipulative bastard? I am really sure it was brought up in several separate discussions.
>>
>>52542140
I've always preferred weapons that provide a benefit to prevent remove curse causing them to immediately abandon the weapon the next day. So the players get some bitching magical weapons but are liable to accidentally kill themselves or each other with them.
>>
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>>52556071
>>52557487
>Long-running campaign based on notebooks of information that the GM may or may not have properly conveyed through nuance, acting, and worldbuilding that the players may or may not have noticed or acted upon
>The longer it goes on, the more complicated it gets by an exponential margin

Remind me why people play investigative games, again. Anything longer than one or two sessions just seems prone to this kinda stuff. You both know Scooby Doo could barely hold together 22 minutes, right?
>>
>>52557487

>I really am sure I mentioned that. Didn't I mention the whole taking over the entire government via assassination, blaming the PCs, starting a war, and generally being a manipulative bastard? I am really sure it was brought up in several separate discussions.

Apparently not. I have already sent you direct quotes of what had been established about the NPC in question, and mind control, illusion, persuasion, and killing people are not among those.
>>
>>52524662
My character used his soul as collateral to take out a loan to pay for college.
>>
>>52549587

That explanation sounds pretty good to me; but it's only the character's half of the bargain.

The obvious counterpoint to that image is "well what about a retard paladin that blows up the world thinking that's what god wants? he won't fall in that case" which seems pretty stupid.

I'm guessing the disconnect here is that rage probably takes the stance that the paladin will always have an accurate understanding of what his god would want him to do in a given situation, and as such could only contravene his deity's commands intentionally. But, it doesn't cover the case where the follower misinterprets his duty or is just plain stupid and/or ignorant. A max retardd paladin murdering his sworn liege, mistakenly assuming him to be some kind of evil mastermind or something, probably deserves a fall even if he/she was totally convinced it was right.

I guess rage's explanation isn't really so much incorrect as imprecise.
>>
>>52557428
Your insults are weak virgin
>>
>>52555744
Some people take table top games too seriously for any sort of chance that's outside of their control.
>>
>>52551963
you're doing god's work anon
>>
>>52558979
That's stupid. A human is not a deterministic machine. There are random factors at play, even from conception, randomly combining DNA.
>>
>>52560220
Yep it is stupid. But hardcore nerds get butthurt easily.
>>
>>52549846
No, but they were so derpy they traded their soul to what is likely a manifestation of undead evil, which will eventually come back to bite them, is grounds for a paladin to at least not care about your well-being.

What paladin in their right mind would not smite someone this stupid, if only to save them from themselves?
>>
>>52550890
Im very interested in hearing more, anyone know what its called?
>>
>>52563318
No.
>>
>>52524662
If it were real life, yeah. But it's a game. The point is to have fun. If you're hoping for something fun to happen, and for an interesting story to be told, why would you NOT accept that offer? The odds of anything really cool or memorable happening if you say no are slim. If you say yes, even if the GM just dick kills you two seconds later, it's still at least a better story to tell around the table years later than anything that likely would have happened otherwise.
>>
Have the lich enchant their weapons to glow when evil creatures are around, and glow stronger the more they get close to them. Only, it's not evil creatures, they are humans. Just have the lich persuade them via mental corruption (have the resist test become increasingly difficult to resist over time until they have to submit to it) that other human people are not actually human but a sort of monstrous lifeform hidden under an illusion spell and they must be killed at all costs to save the world from their horrible dominion. Meanwhile, the lich will drink on the warriors' lifeforce but also feed on the souls of the slain ones.

Then let the paranoia and carnage unfold.
>>
>>52524662
Is it telling about the people I play with that while most are saying now you have a lich stuck to your soul, I just thought the lich had tricked them so they'd dump their weapons?
>>
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>>52525747
>>52526113
Make that two somebodies.
>>
>>52567658
The bait is too big for that.
If he had gone 'I'll enchant your weapons as a peace offering, if you leave me alone' it would be a possibility.
As is, the lich is better off just sticking to the deal, there's no need for betrayal.
Unless there's no ritual, and the lich is really 3 children's skeletons in a bath robe.
>>
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>>52524920
When they come back for their weapons you should have the lich turn on them after bursting out laughing and saying "I still can't believe you did it! You unbelievable idiots!"
>>
>>52567790
>Unless there's no ritual, and the lich is really 3 children's skeletons in a bath robe.
It is 1 child with a ring of illusions.
Did they check for magic/undead/evil/whatever to see if that was an actual lich? That should go without saying, but we're dealing with actual retards here so...
>>
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>>52524662
I have no words for this
>>
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>>52524662
Is this what it's like to play with Medaka Kurokami?
>>
>>52524894
>a lich that also wants to put his ectoplasm all over their souljuice.
ewww
>>
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>>52555093
Brilliant.
>>
Did he offer to trim their armor too?
>>
>>52560220
That's not what non-deterministic means, dingus. If you think that's random, chances are you're dumb
>>
>>52544870
>This is a succubus posting on /tg/
>>
>>52576450
To be fair, chemical processes are pretty much stochastic. Which would deny a chance a determinism.
>>
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>>52524662
>>
>>52551712
>I'll deliverately hide information so when they reply I'll call them retards by adding this new info
So this was bait, go figure
>>
>>52553627
Still, Baelnorn and other non evil undeads
>>
>>52524662
>Lich comes closer and tries to cast a spell to kill them all
>Turns out the group were all monks
Each one wearing different monochromatic clothing didn't make you suspect?
>>
>>52553711
THIS THIS THIS
>>
>Party is all Eldritch Knights and Bladelocks
>>
>>52549541
Yes, obviously.

What kind of deity gives power to any but the most zealous of their followers?
>>
>>52532705
But a mirror anon.
>>
>>52551851
He's cultured, as indicated by his formal dress. Clearly he has a snake butler.
>>
>>52551374
>not every dude in that setting would know that
Every dude in the setting would know that, the same way they know to avoid bears and big cats.

>You have Baelnorns and other not evil (some even good) Undeads
This is the thing very few people would know, and would probably think is a lie if they were told of it.
>>
>>52580639
>Every dude in the setting would know that
>Knowledge skill: In many cases, you can use this skill to identify monsters and their special powers or vulnerabilities. In general, the DC of such a check equals 10 + the monster’s HD. A successful check allows you to remember a bit of useful information about that monster.
>The most useful skill in identifying undead creatures is Knowledge (religion), since the teachings of the temple often include information about these foes of all living clerics. When you view an undead creature, you can identify its kind (ghoul, wraith, mummy, and so on) by making a successful Knowledge (religion) check as a free action. The DC of the check is 10 + the creature's base HD. Don't include any extra HD from advancement or class levels in this calculation. For creatures without a base quantity of HD (such as a vampire or lich), set the DC at 20 or 10 + total HD, whichever is lower. If you can hear an undead but not see it (for instance, a mummy shuffling through the darkness), add +5 to the DC when trying to identify it.
>Characters without much expertise in Knowledge (religion) can use Gather Information to learn about undead creatures, though this check typically only comes into play after a first encounter with a particular kind of undead. Use the same DCs as for the Knowledge (religion) checks.
Yeah, no
>>
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>>52581027
>Meets decaying skeleton wizard raising undead servants
>asks you to allow him to split his soul and attach it to you
>"I clearly don't know enough about religion to figure out if this is a bad idea."
>>
>>52581195
>Raising undead servants
Not mentioned in the OP
And non evil necromancers are a thing
>asks you to allow him to split his soul and attach it to you
Good creatures can do that too

If you fail the Knowledge Religion and Sense Motive rolls you can't blame your players for deciding to trust the powerful sorcerer who defied death

And again, you said every dude, manual tells you that in fact almost nobody will know what a Lich is
>>
>haha dude my players are so DUMB I'm going to make them be the lich's bitches and get them stuck in hell forever because FUCK their fun it's time for me to show how superior I am to these pissants

Cancel the game and never DM again. You clearly aren't mature enough for it.
>>
>>52524662
They walk up expecting their weapons and the litch is sitting in his thinking chair staring at them.
"okay listen, I didn't think that was going to work. I was going to kill you all since you have no weapons but you are all retarded and made it to this point on stupid luck. Just leave, it almost hurts how stupid adventurers are nowadays."
>>
>>52582004
>Just leave, it almost hurts how stupid adventurers are nowadays.
What if the lich lets them go with the intent of letting them procreate/teach others, thereby lowering the overall intelligence of the population in order to make them easier to control?
>>
>>52524724
>>52524662
I say actually do it,
but then have a party of paladins hunting down one of the PC because he just became a Phylactery
>>
>>52578524
They're approximately stochastic in aggregate because we're unwilling and unable to analyze the individual constituents of any given composite structure

Whether those constituents are in-and-of-themselves truly stochastic is as-of-yet unknown, so it's not necessarily deterministic, but even if one takes for granted the stochastic interpretations of quantum mechanics, non-determinism sure as fuck don't come from DNA recombination
>>
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>>52549666
In the TOEE vidya I fell for these guys' trap...
I was a Young and VERY naive boy then...
>>
>>52525085
>>52549523

Basically, the difference here is that the players traveled to a mountain, saw signs that read "Warning: Avalanche" and decided it would be a good idea to play with explosives.
>>
>>52575526
Top kek.
>>
>>52575526
Fuck you! Give me my Addy back!
>>
>>52583321
You don't even need a stochastic interpretation of quantum mechanics, just the uncertainty principle denies the existence of enough information to make the world deterministic. Though of course, there is still the possibility of the universe working in a way that is fundamentally deterministic, but beyond our current knowledge of physics. But at this point I don't really see it as the most likely. (nor is it a question that really matters)
>>
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>>52543881
>The first time they cast sleep on a questgiver (who worked for the local government) to steal her magic items. Magic items she promised them for completion of her quest, AFTER THEY ALREADY COMPLETED THE QUEST SHE GAVE THEM. Like at least kill the person you rob, try and tie some loose ends up.
>AFTER THEY ALREADY COMPLETED THE QUEST SHE GAVE THEM.
>>
>>52543021
Every time I read this I cringe remembering the time me and a few friends made a tard aware of the fact that he was untouchable
>>
>>52567244
That's like the story of the guy saying yes to everything. Yes, your life will be more interesting. Doesn't make it less stupid
>>
>>52524662
The vampires hiding in the pit proceed to kill the PCs with their own weapons, but suffer penalties to attack and damage from laughing.
>>
>>52525785
This, OP
>>
>>52528536
>>52549672

http://archive.4plebs.org/tg/thread/50579499/
>>
>>52589188
This is going to be a good read.
>>
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>>52532347
>>
>>52589188
Thank you, now i really want to find someone to draw the pic of the lich and the demon laughing like in the meme
>>
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>>52589188
>even considering dealing with an entity that was sealed by 9 fucking Paladin Orders and expecting not to get fucked
>>
>>52534364
ARCLICH: LORD OF THE SKELETON DANCE
>>
>>52532347
I realize this is probably bait but you should probably kys yourself
>>
>>52524662
When will the weapons be finished?
>>
>>52524662
Yes. have the lich kill them and raise them as his servants with limited will.
They are forced to do his bidding. Campaign has become evil.
>>
>>52543021
The end sounds like a bunch of bullshit. If Fats was legit retarded, he would've been found incompetent to stand trial.
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