Why have you stolen from the giant's garden, even though

>>52242927
I was going to ask at first, but climbing that beanstalk got me into this really bad mood.

>>52242927
For the challenge.

We tried asking the last five giants politely and they slaughtered and ate us. If he's still willing to share we'll apologize and do what we can to repair our relationship, but you can bet we'll be cautious about it.

>>52242927
How badly have you fucked up, OP?

>>52242927
Not having to rely on the whims of a 10ft angry monster to survive is an important part of my strategy

>>52242927
His home looked abandoned though.....

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>>52243033
>We tried asking the last five giants politely and they slaughtered and ate us
Slaughtered you?

An easy target. Adventurers are cocks.

>>52243097
We got better.

>>52243097
They had 1 HP left so they were able to drag themselves back into town by the entrails and get a cleric to heal them

>>52243432
After being eaten?

>>52242927
The bard dared me.

>>52243553
Barbs be tough, yo.

>>52242927
This is your garden? I just thought it was a forest of trees that happened to be apple trees. Could you put up a sign or a fence or something?

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>>52242927
> Why have you stolen from the giant's garden, even though he would've gladly shared his bounty with the humans had they only asked politely?
The fall of the giant will invite me to my rise.

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>>52242927
It's more fun this way. Later, I will apologize and ask to be his adorable miniature wife.

>>52243644
Who is this guy? I see him posted everywhere.

>>52243725
Try googling the filename mate

>>52242927
Diplomacy makes me feel like less of a man.

>>52242927
It's in human nature to be shitty to others.

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>>52243725
Max Stirner, a hypocrit who dressed selfishness in philosophy, and also a source of top memes

>>52242927

In our culture making a request is an insult, as it puts the onus of determining the outcome on the person asked. Now his honor is protected no matter his choice: if he attacks us he is just, if he demands restitution he is fair, if he seeks no redress he is kind.

Perhaps, if he does not choose to grind us into tiny bits, we shall make for him a sign to hang in the garden so none of us may be as confused in the future.

>>52245337
Mad spook detected.

Don't trust anyone over 21'

>>52245936
You jealous?

>>52245337
Is he the male Ayn Rand?

>>52242927

It's easier to beg for forgiveness than permission.

>>52246341
It's quite common in Columbia, or so they say.

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>>52242927
A king does not ask. It is mine by decree of my strength and my will to take it from you.

Submit or stake your claim and perish, for I walk the path of Royalty.

>Reach Heaven through violence.
>If you should meet God on the road, kill him.

>>52242927
The royal decree clearly stated that I was not to negotiate with the giant by any means. I am being watched. If I am seen interacting with him in any non-hostile way, I will be executed as a traitor where I stand.

If the Crown has its way, the giant will be consumed in the same blast that kills me.

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>>52244782
>It's in nature to be shitty to others.

FTFY, humans are only a symptom of the greater problem.

>>52247428
He's better. Ayn was spooked by the foolish concept of private property.

Isn't that a picture of a storm giant? I thought cloud giants were the ones who keep gardens.

>>52242927
We were incredibly drunk and it was a bet.

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>>52247428
>implying Ayn Rand wasn't going full-retard with her self-contradicting ancap philosophy
At least the man is honest with himself.

>>52252070
Storm giants subsist on lithium ions.

>>52252783
She also took all the government assistance when she was diagnosed with lung cancer.

Rand is a hypocritical cunt.

>>52254250
Well, her philosophy was basically "be a selfish prick, and whoever isn't is a sucker". It doesn't have anything against TAKING free money if someone else is stupid enough to give it to you.

>>52253496
Even as a battery joke, this doesn't work.

>>52254507
>". It doesn't have anything against TAKING free money if someone else is stupid enough to give it to you.
Then why was the male taggart a villain?

>>52255337
BECAUSE he's the villain. The book is from the point of view of the heroes, therefore they're the ones whom you're supposed to cheer for when they act like pricks. When others do it, it hurts them.

You need to think more like a sociopath.

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>>52242927
Because we're the villains of course! We can't win fairly! That would be wrong!

Yes I actually ran a campaign once where the Bad guy was named Richarde D'Astarlé. It took the PCs ages to figure it out