I need some suggestions for traditional Dunmer cooking. My told

Mushrooms and spices.

Kwama eggs (hardboiled). Insect meat and goo as staples. Mushrooms, mushrooms, mushrooms.

First off, it's Dunmeri.

Second of all, some guy did this and if you scroll down you'll get his food analogues and recipes:

sunderlorn.tumblr.com/tagged/Food-of-Tamriel/chrono

Inb4
>tumblr
like nobody understands what it is

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But remember to use ORIGINAL imported ingredients

They're not cheap, but otherwise enjoy eating you ersatz shit that tastes nowhere close the original.

I hate fuckers that think they can just oversalt their basmati and voila, salt rice. No. Fuck.

And don't even get me started with the n'wahs that insist that surimi crabsticks are valid replacement for vvanderfrlian mudcrab meat. Seriously, what is wrong with those people. Even other species of mudcrab, like cyrodiili, have so much different taste an texture, because lack of volcanic ash in their environment which gives the flesh of that crustacean it's characteristic, slightly pungent taste. You can't just make Suran Crabchop Salad with any other meat.

FFS.

>>51888561
Khajiit cock is always popular among Dunmer women

>>51889725
Barenziah pls go and stay go.

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>>51889725
>>51889755
TBQH it's just ANY cock.

>>51888561

If you want to impress someone with your cooking, you'll want to make something you've made before and know you can make well.

>>51889321
>>51889430
Mushrooms are for living in, you filthy N'wahs.

>>51889717
Piggybacking on this to add that you can definitely use most other provincial Nirnroot, except that Crimson shit

>>51888561
What ugly goddamned hair.

>>51891073
It actually fits the race, for once. They have giant freaking mohawks on golden masks for armor

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>>51893420
She and her dad have a pretty imperial view of the world, I met my fiance through her dad while working at Talosmart, Dad was pretty a bro manager. Mom is a whole other story, pure Morrowind native and kinda scary

>>51893420
I'm just tired of them forcing in their godawful fad hairstyle.

>>51888561
Bread crusts stolen from the garbage heaps of Windhelm are a popular dunmeri dish nowadays.

>>51888561
Your cock.
Grab her head and force it down her throats and she'll suck you off like the bitch she wants to be.

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>>51894524

>virtposting

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>>51894514

>>51888561
Your staples are ash yam or saltrice, with rat, crab, hound or scrib flesh, kwama eggs or scuttle (the preserved flesh of shalk beetles) as your protein, and marshmerrow, hackle-lo or hypha phacia supplying your "green" option, so-to-speak. Bread is either imported or made from wickwheat flour.

Your drink options are imported, greef, shein, mazte, sujamma, trama root tea or water.

However, it's important to note that a large part of the cuisine of Vvardenfell is dependent on its culture and class divisions. Most of the "lower class" are hunters, fishers, farmers or miners - food producers (yes, miners are food producers. Kwama nest in caves). As a result the "middlle" classes are mostly artisans, shopkeepers and those in the approved guilds - alchemists, clothiers, armourers, outfitters, jewellers, those sorts of people. Special note must be made of enchanters, because they are mages, and as such may fall under one of the Great Houses (House Telvanni, who are probably a big reason for the rather xenophobic outlook of most of Vvardenfell - a large chunk of the citizenry live in an area where xenophobia is literally an institution and expected of you by your higher-ups). Speaking of the Great Houses, they make up most of the "high class", with the rest being Imperial nobles (not Cyrodiilic the race, Imperial the culture). However, there is one group that hasn't been mentioned here - slaves. For a large part of Vvardenfell's history, slave-ownership was legal, and protected under Vvardenfell law.

>>51896031
As a result, I'd expect there to be two or three different styles of cuisine on Vvardenfell. You'll get your low-class, saltrice or ash yam, scrib-, crab- or rat-flesh or kwama egg and marshmerrow or hypha phacia basic boring cooking, with water or occassionally sujamma, greef, mazte or shein if you're treating yourself (slaves are given bread or saltrice and water, very little else), your middle-class cooking, which is much the same, except with more booze and more elaborate production (also yo're a lot more likely to get hound meat or scuttle), and your high-class cooking, which involves much more meat with more variety, the addition of hackle-lo leaf (a delicacy on Vvardenfell) and a HUGE amount more imported and vintage alcohols.

It's notable in this that Vvardenfell cuisine tends not to involve dessert courses. This is because marshmerrow, one of the staple "green" options, is inherently sweet, and consumed as part of the main course.

Of course, this is ignoring the "mainland" parts of Morrowind, but most Dunmeri culture originates from Vvardenfell in the first place.

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>>51888561
>I need some suggestions for traditional Dunmer cooking
Moon sugar. Duh.

>>51896101
Khajiit is expressing strong interest in your suggestion. Khajiit would be delighted if you elaborated a little.

>>51896101
Moon sugar is basically cocaine to everyone that's not a Khajiit.

>>51888561
If ESOs loot is canon, then Borscht.

>>51896101
She needs a waxing. Fucking slob.

>>51896472
>ESO
>canon anything

>>51889499
This actually looks neat, I'm going to check this out

>>51896459
Isn't it still cocaine to Khajiit, just less strong cocaine?

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>>51898008
Sad part is, ESO USED to have more lore-appropriate meal recipes, but players got grossed out and they were removed. Fucking sucks.

>>51888561
Related to Morrowind cuisine, this one must ask: is dreugh meat safe for consumption?

Khajit has seen dunmer walk in armor made from their shells and their wax is used by everyone in nirn it seems, but this one has never heard of anyone eating Dreugh meat.

God I just want Dunmer women to trample me to death.

>>51888561
i know this style of hair is stupid, but i really like it. why am i this way.

>>51898710
See >>51893420

I live in Morrowind, and it fucking sucks. I made a thread about this a lonnnng time ago, but this bears repeating.

1. Dwemer armor and weapons are more expensive in Morrowind. The prices are ridiculous, and it's hard for me to justify buying dwemer even though I feel it's important for fans to make an effort to support the industry.

2. If you are a girl, you will be groped and treated like shit. I have had men grab my ass in public *7* different times in the past year and a half. My Dunmer friends say that women should just grit their teeth and bear it, since if you try to do something about it you will be publicly shamed. I also feel dirty and pathetic when these incidents occur.

3. Guild culture in Morrowind is...intense. You are expected to show up at social gatherings even if you do not want to. And at these social gatherings people have the EXACT SAME CONVERSATIONS AGAIN AND AGAIN. I've had like 50 conversations about having seen a mudcrab the previous day. You have to say "good morning" every day in a very specific way, and if you don't then someone will approach you and tell you that's not how things are done at the XYZ's guild.

4. The people treat outlanders like shit. Even the ones who try to be nice come across as condescending and rude by Cyrodiilic standards. There are also a large number of Dunmer men who think outlander women are sluts and that they can get you to open your legs at the drop of a hat. Fuckers.

I wish all the Morrohiles could actually visit GLORIOUS RESDAYNIA. They'd change their tune.

>>51896459
According to some sources moon sugar by itself is pretty much just sugar if not refined into skooma, like how poppy seeds by themselves are harmless but can be refined into opium.

>>51898104
No for the cats it acts more like a psychedelic like DMT

>>51900323
Eating anything made from poppy seeds will still make you fail drug tests

>>51900232
I know this is copypasta, but for the 2nd point, don't Dunmer girls go into heat once they're eighteen, as said in the Biography of Barenziah?

>>51900323
And cocaine by itself isn't that bad for anything but your heart, in that way skooma is like crack.

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>>51900323
>like how poppy seeds by themselves are harmless

Just highly addictive.

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>>51900232
Such is why this one prefers to live in Skyrim. Nords are a crud, racist lot, but there is plenty of open spaces khajit can settle without being bothered, and nords are willin to look past your race if one can match them for drink and then punch them out.

Such is not a problem for this one.

Also, no snobbish Altmer.

Seriously, why do khajit ally with those assholes when altmer hate us more than our enemies?

>>51901344
Altmer kidnapped the Mane and blamed the Imperials.

The Khajiit are HARDCORE opposite from the Thalmor in goals, Khajiit were given the mission by Azura to help preserve Nirn as a thing, whereas the Thalmor secretly want to destroy it. If the Khajiit knew that, Mane be damned, they'd be carving through the Thalmor.

>>51900720
No.