>the headmaster has given your party a simple task >teach

>>51738590
Alright girls, this is how you debone a goblin. First, take your knife and JAM it into the pelvis just above the crotch. Oh, and make sure you got a good quality serrated knife for this, Goblins can get pretty gristly.

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>>51738590
Alright kids, first lesson: never split the party. Terrible, terrible things will happen if you split the party.

WHY THE FUCK AREN'T ANY OF YOU GIRLS WEARING PANTS WHAT KIND OF SCHOOL IS THIS I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL I NEED A COP AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>>51738619
For instance: splitting the party without agreeing about when and where to meet back up.

>>51738615
>D&D

>>51738619
>CoC

>>51738645
>Shadowrun

>>51738590
>GM knows I hate loli's
>Why is he pandering to the loli-fag?
>As if pandering to the furfag wasn't bad enough
>Fuck this shit I'm done
>I'm going to ruin this campaign and his house
>With no survivors

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The lessions our party will teach:

>Paladin
The better you try to act the worse the world (read: GM) will punish you.

>Psion
Never fuck a succubus.

>Ranger
Orphaned dwarves should be left on the side of the road.

>Fighter
Vampires make for the worst maids.

>Bard
Only mount better than a bear is a flying bear.

>Wizard
If you stay true to your dream you will eventually get a floating island and everything will be worth it.

>>51738720
Your GM sounds like a real sadist

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>>51738590
Hello, Paperweights. That's all you girls are and ever will be.

>>51738590
Anything can be cursed. always bring holy water, you never know when your GM will be a dick and curse a ladder.


Also ... mimics. Everything is a fucking mimic.

>>51738590
The most important part to protect is your left leg. Because for some Emperor-damned reason 90 % of all hits you take will hit your left leg.

Also, if you ever find glowing blue crystal shards buried in the ground, bury them the fuck back as deep as you can and get off the fucking planet.

>>51738739
That's one way to phrase it. The party has become a pretty jaded and calloused group of douchebags as a result of the world more or less constantly shitting on us. There's next to nothing they haven't been through at this point, and it's harder and harder for them to even give a shit anything anymore.

>>51738781
I think your GM may of fucked up.

Don't sleep in mysterious homes in the forest. Those are mimics.

>>51738590
Oranges make for the Shittiest of waifruits. Apples the best girl.

>>51738656
More along the lines of running into a dragon that two lone party members can't handle on their own

>>51738781
So you are murderhobos because of a shit GM. Nothing unusual about it

>>51738590
You will need to read the documents and pay attention to things to find clues to the puzzles.

Reading the wrong things or paying attention to the wrong things will likely kill you or rape your san, as will solving the wrong puzzles.

We thought we were starting a normal CoC game ... our GM sent us to Heavenly Host for investigations.

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>>51738660
Kekles Jekles

>>51738645
I just imagined 2D from the Shadowrun Story screaming that and panicking.

Kids, always ask what kind of folk medicine the lesser educated members of the party know.
It could save you from being snogged by a minotaur.

>>51738762
What if the holy water is cursed and/or a mimic?

>>51738933
I think some of the players already have developed PTSD over these things. I think this will just further the cause. I know what I am going to suggest to him and see if it will be possible make some of them go fetal.

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Don't do necromancy kids, not even once.

>>51738590
>When in doubt burn it down no matter how much the party urges you to do otherwise.

>When burning does not work, blow it up.

>When blowing up does not work run

>When running does not work pray

>When praying does not work get a shitty job at a school so you have meat shields in-between you and the horde of vampires you may have pissed off.

>>51738590
Dear children, remember that your soul is precious, and you only get one.

So compare devils before you decide, and always check the contract for recurring payments!

>>51739103
Why sell them YOUR soul? Buy souls from others, then sell them to daemons.

>>51738590
i shit on your table and tell you to fuck off, you fat weeb.

>>51738590
Violence is always the answer to everything. It might not be the ONLY answer, sometimes it's not the BEST answer, but when in doubt violence is always an answer.

>mage class
Sorry, let me adjust the lesson plan.
Fireball is always the answer to everything. It might not be the ONLY answer, sometimes it's not the BEST answer, but when in doubt Fireball is always an answer.

>>51739140
>fucking with the demon mafia's supply chain
>trying to jam yourself in as middleman in a millenias-old industry
This is how you end up a in fucking ditch.

>>51739140
Mortals can't buy souls, silly

>>51738590
Contrary to popular belief, sex in the missionary position for the purposes of procreation is not degenerate.

>>51739294
That sounds like mortal talk to me.

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>>51738590
Never stick, or let yourself be sticked, by crazy, kids.
Especially if he/she's hating tabletop roleplaying games for reasons.

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>>51738645
It's okay, they're not girls they're stakes.
>>51738590
My first lesson is that magic isn't real and Virigillia is a whore and you should always carefully label your tiny food bombs.

>>51738590

If someone makes a "joke" about doing something stupid, like blowing up a wall instead of shooting through a window like a sane sniper or raping a prisoner for answers, before you laugh, make sure they aren't serious

>>51739320
We're all mortals here

>>51739330
If they weren't serious before, they are after you laugh.

>>51738590
Self centered fireball is always a viable option when surrounded. As well never trust the newest party member until he survives long enough, and is competent enough, to actually give a shit about.

>>51739343

This geoup is gonna give me PTSD, I swear.

>>51738590
Mammon is cute! Cute!

Wizards are of homosex, don't be a wizard and kill all wizards.

>>51738703
>hating lolis
What are you? Some kind of alien monster? can't be, even alien monsters love lolis

>>51741472
>Only alien monsters love lolis
FTFY.

>>51739337
[citation needed]

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>>51738590
kids, remember to allways kill Yuan-Ti and lizardmen on the spot, skin them, sew them into a boot and dump the gore inside. It's best for everyone that way.

>>51738590
From his experiences? I don't get to use his academic background? He studied ancient history damnit, let it be relevant!

Doing good is a Good thing. That's a good lesson. Also wearing trousers is a good thing. Dress warm and comfy, fashion be damned. Protectiveness is also important.
But seriously can you wear something on your lower bodies?
And why do you all have red eyes, it's... Wait, VAMPIRES! Badly clothed loli vampires! Sounds like smiting time!

Welcome to "Magical/Mechanical Hybrid Siege Engine Operation 101." If any of you have forgotten your permission slips or EOD suits you'll have to sit the lesson out in the blast booth.

Remember to pay attention, children. If your mind wanders while you're using one of these thunder ballistae you may end up floating in the astral plane wondering where your leg went. Which is no fun, trust me.

Now stop crying and open your texts to Chapter 1: Basic Safety Procedures and Relevant Prayers.

>>51738933
Bring unholy water too, just make sure you always know which is which.

>>51738590
I would say: "Stay out of Technocracy affairs", but my character already knew that and it seems like nobody else will live long enough to learn from it.

So I guess that doesn't count.

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Do not, I repeat, do not shoot at the hostage in order to defeat a kidnapper, even more so if you do it without looking just to look cool and to show off your archery skills.

>>51742805
The only exception is if you also want the hostage dead. Then it can be used to make the kidnapper shit his pants.

>>51738590
I am gonna make my penis disappear.

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>>51738590
Alright listen to me you whelps. You're going to learn how to insult faggot elves like a proper dorf. You're going to make them cry & then brew beer with their tears. Then you'll bend them over & examine how butthurt they are. You will laugh at their misfortune. You'll do it all so you can smug at their faggot faces.

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>>51741431
What if the best way to kill wizard is to be better wizard?

>>51738590
This sounds really comfy. I don't think having my warlock give out advice is a good idea though.
>captcha Camping Rocks

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>PC is blatant ripoff from obscure manga
>canonically part-time teacher
Oh boy...

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>>51738590
Alright younglings, I have three lessons to teach you:
1. Never trust an Elf, they're lying, cheating, backstabbing scum
2. Never trust a Elf's claims about their proficiency with a bow, refer to lesson 1
3. Never, EVER permit an Elf to shoot the individual you're engaged in combat with, refer to lesson 2

The remainder of this lesson will be spent educating you fine young girls about the glorious history of my people, and our triumph over the Elven scum in The War of Vengeance. And so help me Grimnir, if so much as one of you calls it The War of the Beard, you'll be running laps around the oval until you're vomiting up your breakfast. Now, let's begin.

Furthermore, put on some damn pants. For shame.

>>51738590
Okay kiddies, it's like this:
When in combat and in doubt, reload.
When out of combat and in doubt, repack your mags.
When you're not sure about how much gun you need, bring a launcher.
And what ever you do, don't engage the balkens in melee unless you have AT LEAST three team mates to back you up.
Also, never doubt the usefulness of a paranoid with acute PTSD

>>51744508
>>51738645
>mages
>pants

>>51738590
Hey kids, want to learn how to hunt a rancor without having to use some poor sap as bait?

Don't worry, it works exactly like using him as bait, he just doesn't have to be told.

>>51738797
>All this apple wank.
>Doesn't even know about peaches.

Peach is best waifu and best waifruit.

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>>51738590
Wrath > Sloth > Pride > Envy > Greed > Lust > Gluttony

All are best girl though, some are just more best than others.

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>>51738590
>teach the class a lesson learned from your experiences
Skub is a wondrous substance that can make all of the following come true and more:
- Revive your beloved witch!
- Give you 50 tons of pure gold!
- Turn furniture into human!
- Make FAAAAT people lose weight!
- Allow single mothers to get the parenting award they crave so much!
- Revive your dead brother!
- Turn moon hotels into a booming business!
- And so much more!

Skub is great! Use it everyday!

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>>51747991
>belphegor not at the top
The best dad doesn't approve.

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>>51748148
Belphegor is pretty great, but she's not my waifu

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>>51748179
Eh, Satan still rates pretty high on my scale though. Probably immediately after Belphe and Mammon.

>Children, if you look carefully at my arm, you can see where my patron demigoddess replaced my flesh with hers! Today's lesson: how to conduct surgery while unconscious.

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Protein-rich breakfast followed by a full day of physical training, regular rest periods will be lessons on ki, mediation and flight.
In the evening it'll be how to prepare a feast which will be our dinner.
Cleaning up, massages, hot baths, perfectly innocent skinship and finally, time to sleep.
During the night while they're asleep she'll be using her ki to heal their painfully sore muscles.
Come morning another breakfast before she helps them fly home.

Over this day she would have also given them an abridged history of the Z-Fighters, her own trying to find the remains of the Saiyans and the rescue of her friends and the attempted demonic takeover of Earth. Also everything she knows about the Dragon Balls and why they will solve most problems.

She'll give it a year before they head off together to find them all.

>>51741644
You, I like you.

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>>51748115
> pro-skub

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>>51738590
If somebody tells you to get in the giant robot, you get in the giant robot and you robot that giant robot as giant as you can until you can't giant robot anymore.

There is no half-assing giant robots girls, that's how you get people killed. You fully ass any giant robot you happen to pilot and if everything goes wrong at least you can say 'I put my ASS into that giant robot and NOBODY can say anything different.'

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>>51738590
>It's a harem anime about a lonely transfer student (male) trying to find new friends by starting a TTRPG club
>But in a surprising twist, only five beautiful girls show up!
>They're inexperienced, but they're fast learners and really into roleplaying
>REALLY into roleplaying
>Before long it gets really weird

>>51743585
>Magic must defeat magic

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>>51748115
This is you on skub.
Don't do skub kids.

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>>51752201
Damn straight

>>51738590

My party

>Fighter
Combat training with impractically large weapons

>Ranger
Fantastic beasts and where to fight them

>Rogue
Identifying cursed items by touch

>Cleric
Economics 101 - Building a financial empire on the backs of others

>Paladin
Coping with stress

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>>51754258
I find it hard to imagine a more generic party, and I kinda love it. Stick to those tropes.

Alright girls, lesson one: if you're living with a significant other, do not let your best friend live with you.

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>>51738590
When the only thing you have is a hammer...all your problems look like nails.

>>51738590
DIE THE DEATH

SENTENCED TO DEATH

GREAT EQUILIZER IS THE DEATH

Keep a scenthound like a bloodhound, foxhound, or harrier to keep a nose out for rogues and other stealthy threats. They're good at disguising themselves visually (and spiritually if alignment matters), but they rarely make an effort to hide their scent. And in case of emergency, you can grab puppers and go innawoods.

>>51738590
Lesson one. Magic isn't real.

>>51751750
>>51751867
No, no, only one loli. The girls need to be different enough to allow different dynamics between characters. So one loli, who's actually a sophomore/ junior who gets very angry when people treat her like a little kid (but secretly wants to be pampered and fed sweets) and plays Gromak The Destructor, an 8' tall Barbarian whose battle cry is "Blood and Vengance!"

>>51738590
>"Alright class, today I'll begin teaching you how to make extracts and mutagens. By the end of this course you'll each be able to mutate yourselves into a horrible monster capable of ripping and tearing your way out of every problem."

>>51749000
>DBZ Saiyan OC
Please be either distant future, or distant pa-
>Z fighters
Either distant future, or cancer

>>51738590
Remember, if you act like you no what your doing, and that your supposed to be there, enemy guards won't question why your there.

Also, there is very little Thant can't be solved with Wands of Heat and Cool Metal, and basic thermodynamics. That's how we killed that one Deathknight.

>>51738590
But those are furniture, not girls.

> Bard
If manic phase, probably will preach about how one should only use one's earned gold. Also a shitton of lessons on applying cosmetics.
If depressive phase, wear an apron: he'll teach cooking, and he cooks meat really messy. It's like murdering a cow. Repeatedly.

> Wizard
Will probably attempt to convert them into his blind followers with pure charisma. If that fails, will teach them how to use charisma and manipulate those in power in order to get more shekels.
Also a ton of lectures on enchanting items and fireballing, I guess.

> Warrior
Joking, pranking, trolling, murderhoboing, career paths connected to dark magic cults, escaping cult and acquiring bitches AND bling in the process.

> Thief
How to fail all your contracts and still have your job. How to escape three jails in a row without even picking locks. How to endure Warrior's jokes and evade Bard when he's depressive.

> Paladin
How to kill anything with a sword, including your old friends from 20 years ago converted to a cult, advanced level. Deus Vult not necessary to pass the course.

>>51755305
Hey, there were a number of Saiyans off-planet at the time. Hell, judging by Raditz's dialogue a lot of them were cleansing planets for Frieza and never knew anything was wrong.

>>51755536
Considering Vegeta calls him and Goku the last Saiyans, my personal head cannon is that most of then people off planet were cleaned up and killed off in the same way Bardock's team was

>>51754960
We did a game once, without telling the players ahead of time, where magic was in the mind of mages. Magic wasn't real, they were just delirious and thought they were magicking. The mage players were not happy, but it was funny.

>>51738590
LISTEN UP WELPS:
HERE'S HOW YOU PREPARE AN AMBUSH FOR A DAEMONIC BEING THAT WISHES TO SWALLOW YOUR SOUL. THERE WILL BE A PRACTICAL EXAM.

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>>51738590
LET'S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS

TO DEFEAT

THE [Insert evil fantasy race here]

>>51738590
>Druid.
ALRIGHTY THEN!

>>51738590
>That one realm for fur- er I mean space wolves.

ALRIGHT YA SYRUP-SIPPERS!
Welcome to the wonderful reality of being stuck in this shit-ridden galactic fjord.

>>51738590
Lesson 1: take everything that isn't nailed down.
Lesson 2: always bring a good claw hammer so you can also take the things that are nailed down

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>>51755305
>>51755536
>>51755583
Vegeta's brother is alive, much to his shame.
Broly and his father survived up till they ran across the protagonists.
Also in the semi-canon Xenoverse games, a number of Saiyans are still around not even a century after the events of DBZ.

Anyway, Chiri is from the past, decades before Planet Vegeta was destroyed. Time travel is involved bringing her to present.

>>51749000
Is this quest cancer?

>Rogue Trader
So you want to be a sommelier of human blood

>Arch-militant
The art of wielding more guns than you have the limbs for

>Explorator
Ensuring loyalty in your men, via explosive cranial implants

>Sensechal
Diplomatic applications of the demo charge

>>51757426
Do you have an actual DBZ game because holy fuck I wanna join one

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>>51757426
According to the actual lore, within a few hundred years everyone on Earth is at least 1/10 saiyan and can call up their saiyan blood either by accident or by Dragonballs.

Basically, Earth becomes kind of New Vegeta, because the Prince always wins in the end.

>>51758459
Buu is definitely not that pretty.

>>51738590

"Okay, I'm going to need a volunteer to help with this sex ed class..."

A sample of my PFS characters

>Oracle
Why Everything Is Awful And We Are All Going To Die In A Great Tide Of Darkness And Bones

>Alchemist
Alchemy And You: A Terrible Combination That Should Be Avoided At All Costs

>Dwarf
How to Bypass Dungeons With An Adamantine Pickaxe

>Gnome
What Happens If I Electrocute This?

or

Reverse Mountaineering: The Art Of Jumping From Really Fucking High Up

>>51738720
>bard
Mounts

Fify

Samurai: Love and Sword; The art of making your one sided love come out the other side.

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>The reason me and these four sadsacks behind me are here is to turn you fucking bug-eyed pantless children into fine, honed warrior women. Assuming you're human. Hera's tit Clive, what the hell's wrong with their eyes
>Focus Mani
>Right, form a line by my desk and pick out a short sword

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>>51761283
>swords without a cross guard or hand guard
>without a shield of some type
Your Warrior women a shit

>>51738590
Keep your rifle clean and it'll keep you alive.

Aim for the center of mass, if it keeps moving either shoot it in the head or shoot it with something larger.

Fae are weak against silver, but burning them alive makes them not want to come back.

>>51759150
Some time in the future Buu wants a family so he starts to produce children.
I'm sure you could find one that's that pretty.

>>51738590
Always, always, fucking always take the time to make a plan. Literally can't stress that enough.

Know your role in the group. Everyone has a job, know yours and get it done.

Trust but verify. It's better to make an ally, if not a friend, but don't be afraid to fuck shit up if they're not on the level.

>>51741472
>What are you?
I'm Batman.

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+++++++YOU THINK I WILL TEACH MERE CHILDREN THE DANGEROUS AND ARCHAIC SECRETS OF THE OMNISSIAH? OUTRAGEOUS!+++++++++

>>51738720
>Orphaned dwarves should be left on the side of the road
There must be a story behind this and I want to know what it is

>>51751750
God I want to watch this SO bad, no matter how terribly, terribly generic it turn out to be.

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>>51755132
I like this. Perhaps another girl would be the head of the inexplicably powerful student council. Fittingly, she also roleplays a knight (CN) who is the daughter of a prominent noble family and can get away with anything short of murder. She also inserts her magical realm (softcore femdom) really hard just to see the male DM get flustered. Naturally the other girls don't like that very much. This girl also throws her power around to organize LARP events for the TTRPG club.

>>51765087
I'd buy the Blu-Ray, and I never buy Blu-Rays.
I'd also buy figurines of every girl, even worst girl.

>>51738590
First rule: never make a deal with a dragon.
Second rule: NEVER MAKE A DEAL WITH A DRAGON.
Third rule: Geek the mage first.

All other rules are optional.

>>51758459
>Such and effeminate looking Freezia
When I was young I was convinced Freezia was a lady.
Since it became canon that they are a single gendered species it's become my head-canon Freezia is more towards the fem side of things.

"Alright, listen 'ere, eh kiddies? People will tell ya 'oh no, murder is bad!' or some shite like that, yeah? Don't listen to 'em. I got everything I wanted and more, just by stabbin' and blastin' whateva told me no! It's really not that hard, just a bit of muscle and Magic Missles, and boom! You've done it." -our pirate wizard

>>51750725
hey buddy, why don't you go and get me some shoes form the soup store

>>51741472
Not everyone is a pedo
>>51738771
And the right arm. Don't bother with different armor, the emperor protects the rest
>>51756368
I would love to do a training montage like this

I'd like to say she'd give them a lecture on firearm use and safety, detective work, cyber-security, Bioroid and clone ethics or even just on being a Catholic in today's Read: 3000 c.e. secular world.
But realistically she'd give them a slapdash lesson of combat, a few hours at a shooting range and paintball before going out for dinner, drinks and clubbing.

>>51765087
>>51767284
Pretty sure that's Infinite Stratos, have fun.

>>51767488
uh, i can't there's only soup

>>51738590
Lissen 'ere ya grots 'n' squigs.
Nevar trust a zoggin flashy git ta not steal ya teef.

>>51768700
Am telling the cops

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>>51768700
>Not being pedo is gay as fuck.
Looks like someone is going to get SAWED!Seriously though, if your pedophile I hope you die a horrible death that includes maggots eating their way out of your dick

>>51744016

impeccable taste anon

>>51738781
>Giving the players no reason to continue to adventure
What a shit gm

>>51768727
Is this truly the state of /tg/ these days? I honestly can't tell if this is trolling or not. What the hell happened in the years I've been away?

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Remember kids, as a necromancer, there's no such thing as too many skeletons, hell become yourself, worked out great for me.

Oh and if your antipaladin buddy gets a sweet succubus follower, kill that succ creature, she'll only try to kill you all.

>>51738590
25 Reasons One Should Always Carry Sufficient Quantities of Rope

>>51768727
drawings aren't people

>>51738590

>"IT'S NOT A WAR CRIME IF THERE'S NO WAR ON"

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>>51738590
>"Remember kids, never draw your magic from a source that can revoke it should you lose its favor. Drink the weft of the arcane instead, that your power will have no qualms toward its use."

>"Also, never cast transmutation spells on yourself and your familiar simultaneously."

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>>51768700

>>51768855
I'm not sure what you mean, anon.

>>51738590

Okay. First thing. This is three kilograms of Trinitrotoluene or TNT. It is NOT scientifically the same as Dynamite, but generally speaking for our purposes they are the same.
Although, worth pointing out that Dynamite is 25% more explosive than TNT, but generally speaking once you get past the kilogram range it's not too much of a problem unless you need to take down a whole mountain.

And kids. Sometimes you need to take down an entire mountain.

Basically what I am saying here is that Dynamite or TNT or indeed other high explosives is the answer.
The hard part, as a practicing amateur cryptozoologic Investigator is working out what the question is.
Sometimes the question will be: How are we to deal with these inbred fish-rednecks who are breeding Shoggoths in the Docks?

Sometimes its: But they have a mountain fortress guarded by blasphemous horrors out of sanity and reason, how are we going to stop them from summoning their horrifying master from beyond the veil of man?

As always, the answer is Enough Explosives.

Now, for the practical part of this lesson, I'm going to teach you how to make your own Nitroglycerin without losing all of your fingers.
Eyebrows though? No promises.

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One of my characters once literally did a series of lectures in game during down time, he was a necromancer attempting to go legit and explain to the local populate/mage college that he was erudite rather than a frothing lunatic sitting on a bone throne shouting "AHAHAHAHAH, SKULLS!"
40 days, 40 lectures
And I did a god damned title for each one, so you little shits better sit down, it's time for an education:

First 10: Magic & Magic Ethics
-Curses: Careful wording and Cracking
-Privacy and the Sanctity of the Mind: Divination
-Wizards and War: A study of Warmages through history and their impact on the world
-Magical Morality: The Twin Dangers of Hubris and Ennui
-Things man was not meant to know; Things man was not explicitly forbidden to know: Magic within grey areas
-Fire, Earth, Water, Air: The Nature of the Planes and elements
-Balance of the world: Long Lasting Arcane effects and after effects
-Demonology: The Darkest Art
-The God Complex: Research, Isolation and Megalomania
-Material costs and Lead from Gold: How magic effects Economy

Middle 10: Undead, Life and Death
-Reincarnation and the transferral of souls between forms.
-Homonculi, Golems and inanimate animations
-Healing and Death: Negative and Positive energy
-Shambling through the Ages - Animated Deceased throughout History
- Restless legs: A discussion on the Corporeal dead.
-Shadows of Life: Shades, Shadows, Wrights and other visages of the once living
-Grave Knights and Liches: The Self-creating undead.
-Raising the stakes: Vampires before, during, and after death
-The Forgotten and Lost: Unique undead and historical examples of the uncategorized undead (Will include hypothetical discourse on Atropials)
-Æthereal Mortality: Immortal Consequences and Divine Retributions

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>>51769207
Last 20: Necromancy
Basics:
-Cleaning and Preperation of Bodies, (AKA: Ethical Corpse Acquisition: How to tell how fresh is too fresh)
-Sorrow and Loss: Restless Dead and putting them to rest.
-The Speakers of the Dead: Post mortum Comunications
-Swimming against the River: Creation of the Greater undead and accepted theory on their nature
-Moving bones: Animation basics and mechanics
-The Skeletal Miner: Practical applications of Necromancy and Risk free Labour
-The Long Dead: A history of major Necromantic Civilizations, Lost Civilizations and famous Necropoles
-Bokors, Bone Conjurers and Other Historical Necromancy Practitioners
-The Bone War: The applications of the undead as soldiers or guardsmen
-Libris Mortis, Geb, other famous Necromancers of the Past.

Advanced:
-The 94 year Zombie: The spontanious apperance of Sapience, Sentience and a Soul amongst long surviving dead
-The Rayabur Constructs and other Advanced Necromagic engines
-Myths and Legends of Non-magical Undead Creation Rites
-Undead Categorization: Where Animate Necrology Ends and Spirit Conjuring Ends
-Flesh, Bone and Blood: On animation beyond whole cadavers.
-The Simplex Animation: Undead elementals and ideals
-The Simplex Zone: Negative energy, Forgotten Gods and ancient tombs.
-The Tabbian Paradox: Soul fracturing across multiple beings
-The Suduri Coefficient and theoretical upper bounds
-Construct programming (also of interest to Golemancers)

>>51769207
>>51769225
Honestly, those lessons sound neat as fuck

>>51769207
>-Things man was not meant to know; Things man was not explicitly forbidden to know: Magic within grey areas
>-The God Complex: Research, Isolation and Megalomania
>-Cleaning and Preperation of Bodies, (AKA: Ethical Corpse Acquisition: How to tell how fresh is too fresh)

Some of these sound amazing and just tongue in cheek enough to get arses in seats.
Good on you anon.

>Iron Kingdoms Thief/Alchemist: Manufacturing Plague Scares To Resolve Traffic Disputes & Collect Pocket Change 101

>Shadowrun Decker: How to recognize when one of your fellow runners has an Ares Retrieval Team after them, with sidelines into how to safely collect the bounty.

>PF Sorc: So You Accidentally Founded A Cult: A Retrospective (with submodules on Acquiring State Sponsorship, planning, timing and deploying signs of the End Times and Keeping your Wealth mobile)

>>51768940
>drawings aren't people
Same fucking excuse every time. You're like serial killers, you start with small animals (or in your case drawings) and then you go for the real thing when you get the confidence.

>>51770729
That's a shitty response as it implies book readers and vidya players will become serial killers

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>>51771338
I liked how those beliefs lead to actual studies that showed no link between violence in video games and violent behavior in people.

Same with the feminist argument that serialization in games made people specialize and objectify women only for that too be proven false in the only current major study.

>>51738590
Teleport spells come in pairs.
Never teleport in unless you can teleport out.
Screwing this up always ends either tragically or comically.

>>51771487
>I liked how those beliefs lead to actual studies that showed no link between violence in video games and violent behavior in people.
It did show a link between competitiveness and violence. Basically, shit like MOBA games or IWBTG do make you more aggressive, because you get mad at losing.

>>51771338
Fine it is a shitty response, but I still keep my opinion that you fucking pedophiles are disgusting in my eyes, even if you masturbate to drawings of 8 year old's.

>>51772772
You're allowed to be wrong, so good on you for having conviction I guess? But try not to mislabel folks. Only people who have sexual relations with actual children are paedophiles. Thought police aren't real (yet), try not to get someone lynched for no good reason.

>>51739086
>Excuse me professor but that sounds oddly specific

>>51739086
>burning a horde of vampires doesn't work
>blowing up (don't open it) a horde of vampires doesn't work
Who the fuck did you piss off, antediluvians?

>>51772701
Aggressive, but not more violent.

>>51738590

Alright

First rule, ConstantVigilance

For the rest of the school year I will be surprising you at random and cursing you

Yes I am aware am was only hired for today and was told to not curse you

Am still doing it

By next year you should have good enough reflexes to go into a dungeon

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>>51775323
Moody please

>>51773174
>Only people who have sexual relations with actual children are paedophiles.
Wrong! Those are child molestors.

>>51773552
Eh, true, but aggression naturally leads to violence, especially if the individual is mentally unbalanced. I'm not saying that videogames can magically turn someone into school shooter, but it just might be the straw that breaks the proverbial camel's back, and send some psycho over the edge.

>>51775919

Constant Vigilance!

>>51738590
"-Now the risk of failure is of course increased in proportion to the decreased time taken to enchant an object, but other factors such as assistants and tools are also important, along with just how powerful an item you're trying to make. That's why I've taken the precaution of making a fairly low-grade magic item, so the odds of it catastrophically failing are about one in ten thousand, give or take."
>Enacts the ritual
>rolls a 1
>rolls a 100
>Failure level: -152
>front of classroom is now a massive, smoldering crater, the still-living torso and head of my character lies at the bottom of it.
"Okay. New lesson. Creation Magic: How to restore limbs when you fuck up..."

>>51778772
Equally though, one could say the same about competitive physical sports when someone loses.

>>51780597
Yeah, I'm not arguing against that. It's just that very few physically active people feel, uh, "bullied", I guess, for the lack of proper term, and therefore are less likely to lash out.
I mean, who wants to fuck with a ripped dude who doesn't skip his leg day?

>>51738590
is dem sum rukh??

>>51767284
How much does it cost to crowdfund an anime? I'd legit spend at least $1000 on that if /tg/ wrote the script, or even just some of the jokes.
> Required to clean the models
> Can't decide on what kind of skub to use

>>51767999
Ah, no, I didn't mean the pic; I meant the premise of a harem-y slice-of-life anime about a TTRPG club.
I'm familiar with Infinite Stratos though; it was OK I guess. Not great, but not wholly unsalvageable trash. But that's a story for /a/.

>>51781475
If not an anime, even a visual novel would be fine if the writing's good.
I guess it would end up being somewhere between D-Frag and +tic Nee-san...?

>>51781910
Well if it's a visual novel, I could make it. All I'd need is someone to make the art, since my drawing is a fucking joke

RT Swashbuckler: The Difference between Duels and Fights, and how to incorporate experience with one into the other. Followed by Hard Partying 101: How to tell what your limits are and what they mean.

Iron Kingdoms Investigator/Mage with a background in white collar crime: How to spot a fake at 20 paces; Cryptology and You: Why knowing how to decipher codes is helpful; Layering Magic: How to not overload your magic core.

>>51739294
At least get a comission

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>Ranger
>Orphaned dwarves should be left on the side of the road

Oh got I lost it here

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>>51738590
>Ok kids gather around so I tell you a tale about how I healed a Barbarian girl and why I still regard doing it to this day.

>Oh yeah and I want a 2 page essay on what you learned

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>>51738590
>Ranger
"Okay class. Your first lesson is about how to deal with potentially dangerous situations. Say you run into a group of goblins with a hobgoblin leader on a worg. Do you A: Assess the situation and pick them off from a distance. or B: Attempt to jump off a cliff in order to attack their leader, only to fail your acrobatics roll, fall flat on your face, and get one shot by the hobgoblin afterward?"

>Rogue
"Fuck you, I looked cool doing it."

>Ranger
"Remember class, discretion is the better part of valor. If you're walking down the halls of an abandoned tower and stumble upon a group of undead that hasn't noticed you yet, your first reaction should be to slowly creep back to your group and tell them of the situation. An example what you you shouldn't do is yell "HEY UNDEAD FUCKERS!" and proceed to run screaming into the group of undead away from the help of your party."

>Wizard
"Its what I felt I should have done at the time."