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A recent thread got me wondering - what would his world have

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A recent thread got me wondering - what would his world have been like if he had joined Slytherin? It could have happened innocuously enough. All he had to do was choose to hang out with Malfoy on the train. They could have been friends even

Would he have worked for Voldemort? Or would he have still opposed him?
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This isn't /lit/.
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>>51719887
You don't go to /lot/ to discuss fiction
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>>51719865
>Malfoy being friends with some poor kid from a muggle family.

Lets be honest, Harry would have been bullied so bad he'd be the kid showing up to the school dance with an assault rifle and bandoleer of pistols and ammo clips.

But the previous posters are right, take this to the proper board please, it's not /tg/-related in any way.
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>>51719865
Two issues with the premise:
1) Everyone knows who he is before they've met him - even Hermione does, which is kind of odd.
2) Even assuming Malfoy was genuinely nice to him, which is unlikely given the kind of person he was, he'd still be in Snape's sights, and he'd be the subject of his abuse a lot more often being in his house - even Snape's blatant favouritism towards his own students seems unlikely to be outbalanced by his hatred of James, so Harry would effectively become the butt monkey for all of Slytherin.

And being in the same dorm as at the very least 3 Death Eaters' kids can't be good for his health when the plot gets moving
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>>51719865
1)Malfy would still be a dickhead
2)The hat wouldn't give a dick about whom he knew, it goes on his own personality

But even IF he would've gone to slytherin somehow...
Voldy hated him personally, and so in self-defence against his schemes, SlytherHarry would still oppose him.
And hell, with a slythering mindset? He could try to loot some of the shit Voldy was trying to get at for himself.
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>>51719976
Yes, you do. Eject yourself.
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>>51719865
The book would have been a lot better if the kids would have been in different houses (Harry-Ron-Hermione even fit into the Griffyndorf-Hufflepuff-Ravenclaw trio), and it'd have been about cooperation between friends putting aside silly tribal politics.

Also would have made the house cups a bit more exciting.
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Why do wizards there only use wands? No staffs, rings, rods, orbs, clubs, other foci?
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>>51722212
Diviners use orbs to help channel their sight sometimes if that help at all.

I'd imagine it has to do with concealability, ease of use and ease of make. Rods and Staves are off the table because they're big and obviously. Rings are off the table because inherently magical metals are, presumably, even rarer and more expensive than wood and magical animal bits. Orbs are generally more fragile and are the domain of wizards who have the "sight" and charlatans anyways. As for clubs, well, wizards aren't expected to get into melee combat so that'd be silly and barbaric.

However, there are some examples of a few things: Lucius Malfoy had a cane that he concealed his wand in. Hagrid used bits of his snapped wand as part of an umbrella handle so he can use it like a wand occasionally and several powerful wizards are noted as being able to use magic without the use of a wand at all.
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He wouldn't be friends with Hermione and thus would fucking fail. The whole series may as well be Hermione Granger and that Specy Git She's Carrying
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>>51722342
Wands, in my opinion, are a bit like a funnel. They focus the magic of the wizard, but in turn only so much magic can go through it at once. Wandless magic, every time you see it, has a large and powerful effect - it's unfiltered, uncontained. It might be a lot harder to learn wandless magic, but it seems to me like it'd definitely be worth the payoff - you don't have to rely on ANY easily-breakable/stolen item, AND your power is a magnitude greater than wand-using wizards. The fact that they don't teach you how to utilize wandless magic in hogwarts is proof of how shit that school is.
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>>51722408
Not saying she doesn't carry the trio through a lot of the adventures, but she's not that good at the whole "defeating the dark lord" thing - notably, while all of them destroy a Horcrux each, Hermione is the only one who didn't do it on her own (she stabbed the cup with a basilisk fang, which she and Ron retrieved from the Chamber - which they were only able to do because Ron apparently has mad mimicry skills and a good memory)
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>>51719865

Harry would get ripped to shreds in his first couple of years and Voldemort would win.

Too many death eaters in Slytherin. Even with a core group of friends inside the house, he would still be surrounded by enemies on all sides in his own fucking dorm. And as mentioned before, he almost certainly doesn't befriend Hermione this time around.

Kid is dead by the end of book 4, tops.
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>>51722565
What if he becomes the new Dark Lord instead?

I know, I know, we are being edgy here, but so is the premise anyway.

He joins the DE kids, sabotages Voldemort's efforts, and becomes the true successor of Slytherin.
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>>51719865
We might have gotten a series of more mature novels with a lot more moral ambiguity, and the feeling that there are no simple labels like good or bad.
But that wouldn't happen because HP was for children and young adults, and they don't handle moral greyness well. Much easier and more efficient to say "Red = good, Yellow and Blue = unimportant, Green = assholes, except for that one guy but even he's kind of a dick too"
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>>51722583
Dumbledore would probably smack him about the head and get him back on track
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>>51722676
Or, do the "Kids will be Kids" thing, considering that at Harry's age he was conspiring for world domination with Grindelwald.
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>>51722676
Or switch to Plan B: Neville.
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>>51722699
That might make a more compelling story.

On the one hand we have Harry: Secret millionaire with the cash his mum and dad left him, super special "love" blessing that shields him from direct attack from adversary, snowflake birthmark, half the world wanting to suck his wand and surrounded by people utterly loyal to a fault to make up for his failings. Goes camping and scavenger hunting.

On the other hand we have Neville: Lower than average grades in everything but herbs, no hidden fortune, dutifully visits his broken parents every week even though it kills him a little every time inside, bullied and ridiculed for 8 fucking years by staff and pupils, no friends beyond people who tolerate him, no defining features that mark him out for greatness, lightning rod for bad luck. Raises armed rebellion and organizes a resistance movement.

If it had been Neville as the Chosen One Voldermort would have been slipped magic nullifying poison and then beaten with a plank. The other hoarcruxes would have ensured that he never died but that's not a blessing if you no longer have a single unbroken bone.
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>>51723364
To be fair, the fact that Neville could have ended up as the Chosen one if things had played out slightly differently is pretty much accepted as fact at this point.
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>>51722547
You don't get to the final boss if everyone is dead or if the company is broken two books ago though.
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>>51722699
>>51723364
>>51723412
Harry is the Chosen One because of Voldemort though, he becomes the nemesis because he was marked as his equal. It would need Voldemort going after Neville for him to become the Chosen One. We could still have Harry as a spoiled slytherin kid though, wouldn't have been for the worst.
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>>51722547
>>51723490
Hermione is the Book Smarts.
Harry is the Practical Smarts (He's always been the best in class when it comes to Defense Against the Dark Arts when it wasn't taught be Snape).
Ron is the rest of us.
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>>51720151
Harry's pure blood as a mahfah, he's just staying with muggles during the summer. The Potters were old wizard money, just like the Malfoys.
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>>51723364
The alternative is that Neville needs to kill Harry, as he's the last Horcrux.
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>>51723508
Yes, but because Voldy knew that both the Longbottoms and Potters opposed his regime. It was pretty much a coin flip, and he went after the Potters instead because Peter Pettigrew was a dirty rat and revealed their location too him.
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>>51723533
Except he's not? Lily Potter was Aunt Petunia's sister, whom was a muggle.

Harry Potter's a Half-blood like Voldy was.
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>>51723508
Neville was also marked by Voldy in a "I've tortured your parents to madness worse than death and fucked your life up" sort of way.
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>>51723598
So how pure is "pure"?
Are his children purebloods?
Does one drop of muggleborn ruin you forever?
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>>51720151
True, but Harry does have the advantage of celebrity. Malfoy would probably have made an exception although the dynamic would have been kinda weird once his father found out.

Also, Harry's poverty is a mask. He's rich as hell, and being a young kid he would have probably said as much if he thought it would win him points with his friends. They would have probably laughed him off, but then he could have made a show of his Gringott's account, or bought something absurdly expensive to prove it.
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Go read 3d10 of the innumerable fanfictions about that and report back.
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>>51719887
>>51720151
>thinks HP isn't /tg/-related
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>>51722494
>The fact that they don't teach you how to utilize this incredibly difficult type of magic that could easily go horribly wrong in hogwarts is proof of how shit that school is.
Makes sense.
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>>51722342
> and several powerful wizards are noted as being able to use magic without the use of a wand at all.
I suddenly remembered that background character from the first Harry Potter movie, who telekinetically moved his spoon without a wand.
I wonder what was his deal.
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>>51723735

The dude reading a brief history of time?

Probably shouldn't fuck with him.
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>>51723766
I'd agree that you shouldn't fuck with him, though it may be that to wizards muggle science books are what 'textbooks' on dragons and wizards and old alchemy books are to us - interesting and cool because of the amount of work that's gone into them rather than their non-existent factual content
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>>51723735
He was also reading quantum physics
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>>51723822
The content IS factual though; physics exist and work in the HP universe. A Wizard who studies them and applies magic using scientific principles could be a ridiculously powerful enchanter.
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>>51723822
Dude's going to become the Robert Oppenheimer of modern magitek. When do we get his movie?
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>>51723735
>>51723766
>>51723848
Guy needs a spin-off
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>>51723869
That was the Premise of Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality, our favorite worst HP FanFic.
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>>51719865
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7659033/1/They-Shook-Hands-Year-1-New-Version

And please, get back to /tv/
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>>51723673
Theoretically you could breed out the muggle like with most anything else genetic.
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>>51724021

magic isn't genetic though
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>>51723974
Far too late now. We're over 40 posts In, and the mods and Janitors have done nothing. Besides, they never really cared about what was in the OP as long as it was /tg/ or /tg/-adjacent(fantasy settings) they care more about results, so as long as this thread doesn't devolve into something bannable, we're seeing this thread to bump limit.
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>>51719865
There are a lot of Slytherin kids that dabble in the dark arts, so Harry would have either been trying to clean Slytherin house or he would have caved and started doing their practices along with them (due to peer pressure). I think he still would have opposed Voldemort because Harry has morals when it comes to killing people, but he would probably try and remake the Slytherin house to become a lot more aristocratic and less skeevy and conniving.

Maybe this unfitness between character and ability is what made the sorting hat put him in Gryffindor after all.
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>>51724055
It might not be genetic but it sure as shit is inheritable.

Most of the magicals in Hogwarts had magical parents. Most magical couples will produce only magical children. Hermione and Filch were exceptions rather than the rule.
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>>51723673
The Potter family is officially half-blood now, because Harry is a half-blood. They were pure blood up until James Potter married Lily Potter, but were never included as official pure bloods because they had what the other Twenty-Eight pure blood families (minus the Weasleys, who agreed with the Potters) called an unhealthy interest in the welfare of Muggles.

And it's mentioned in the books that the whole "pure blood" thing is a fucking joke that came out of the early 1900s in particular (it had strength earlier because of Slytherin, though his ideas were thought of as crazy talk), because there are no wizard families alive that don't have non-magic blood in them somewhere, no matter what they might claim.
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>>51722494
>It might be a lot harder to learn wandless magic, but it seems to me like it'd definitely be worth the payoff - you don't have to rely on ANY easily-breakable/stolen item, AND your power is a magnitude greater than wand-using wizards. The fact that they don't teach you how to utilize wandless magic in hogwarts is proof of how shit that school is.

Wandless magic is also incredibly difficult to control, because it's unfocused. Lose your temper, get tired, do something stupid, and you've blown up your aunt. It does seem to be weaker, though. There's a reason wands channel and focus power to a much greater degree, and also make it easier to do so.

They don't teach wandless magic to CHILDREN for a very good reason, in fact they drive home the point very solidly by prohibiting them from using magic while underage and making sure they all have wands. Giving them magic is bad enough, you want to put unfocused power in the hands of hormonal adolescents?

When you're an adult, things get a bit different, you could in theory learn then. Apparition is literally wandless magic and they teach it under very controlled circumstances, and there's still a big deal with people tearing themselves in half because they fuck it up.
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>>51724293
Like, for example, what happened whenever Harry threw a fit at the Dursleys?
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>>51724508
Pretty much. The Dursleys were lucky he didn't do anything worse, from memory there are stories of wizard children with abusive parents coming into their powers much more explosively and violently. All Harry did was make some glass disappear, magically regrow his hair, and other minor stuff.

Compare that with Tom Riddle as a child.
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>>51724293
That sounds similar to nonverbal magic (both in HP and Eragon). Hard to control, but much harder to predict or counter than verbal spells. I'd imagine powerful spells could be cast faster wandless since it doesn't have to flow through a small focus, but the magic in wands' cores would make powerful spells easier to learn and less draining.

Sphinx unrelated.
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>>51724236
Harry isn't a half-blood, that's the term for wizards with a muggle parent. His mom was a witch, making him... Son of a muggleborn? Not a half-blood, at any rate.
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>>51724124
Harry was an inch away from Slitherin pretty much the entire time. He could have gone dark anywhere from the start to the end. Every time he dabbled in dark magic, accidentally or otherwise, it went off without a hitch. He cast the "cut a bitch" spell perfectly the very first time he tried it, he cast the forbidden mind control spell perfectly the first time he tried it, ect.
And high level magic in that setting has emotional and mental components. You have to *want* it to happen. Most people couldn't cast that spell because it's just not in their mindset. Harry had no problem doing so.
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>>51725856
Don't forget the time he used the Cruciatus curse on Bellatrix at the end of book/movie 5. It wasn't "torture the bitch sane" strong, but it was powerful enough to knock her off her feet.
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>>51725945

>but it was powerful enough to knock her off her feet.

Only in the movie. IIRC in the book all it did was surprise her enough to make her stop and chirp at him for his impotence.
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>>51726020
I did mention the movie as one of the sources. ;)

But, the point still stands. He could have driven right off into the dark end at any moment. The only thing that really stopped him was the people around him constantly reminding him to be the good guy.
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>>51726186

>The only thing that really stopped him was the people around him constantly reminding him to be the good guy.

That and he did sincerely want to be the good guy.

I disagree with the notion Harry spent the whole series walking a razor's edge. There were a few moments where he was tested but even on his worst day he was never anywhere near as bad as Tom Riddle.
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>>51719865
>Would he have worked for Voldemort?
Probably.
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>>51719887
>/lit/

Because this is surely a topic that requires circlejerking Ulysses for the billionth time, isn't it

That's like telling someone to go to /mu/ to talk about actual music.
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>>51726786
>pic

Is retarded. The purity of your blood has nothing to do with your spellcasting capability. In fact, the most purebred heiress of Slytherin could only do potions, while her half-blood son actually became one of the most feared wizards ever.

In the HP-verse, alloys are stronger.
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>>51726842

Don't forget Lily and Hermione, both remarkably intelligent and skilled witches despite having normie parents.

That said I think that pic is satire.
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>>51725749
Voldy considered him a half-blood, at least. That's partially why he chose him over Neville, because he saw some special significance in both of them being half-blood.

>>51722208
>The book would have been a lot better if the kids would have been in different houses (Harry-Ron-Hermione even fit into the Griffyndorf-Hufflepuff-Ravenclaw trio)
Nah, the proper setup would have Ron in Gryffindor, Harry in Slytherin and Neville in Hufflepuff. Ron is pure Gryffindor: brave and outspoken but kind of a dick.

I heard that was Rowling's original plan but that she couldn't figure how to have Ron befriend a Slytherin Harry.
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>>51720151
>Harry would have been bullied so bad he'd be the kid showing up to Hogwarts' winter ball with an assault wand and bandoleer of potions and chocolate frogs

Fixed that for you.
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>>51727055
Well, if they had met on the train and become friends, but neither of them ever interacted with Malfoy before the sorting, Harry wouldn't have had any prejudice against Slytherin house and Ron could have been his friend based on their pre-sorting interactions. It might have taken longer for them to be really close friends, but the dungeon troll event would seal the deal.
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>>51727055
>Ron is pure Gryffindor: brave and outspoken but kind of a dick.

I disagree, Ron was always the one who was afraid of stuff. Even the was his family is portrayed suggested that they are diligent workers, not heroes.
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>>51727417
But every single one of them, Ron included, steps right up to bat every time they need to do something heroic or brave. Even when he was scared, Ron jumped right in.
"Knight to H3."
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>>51727417
>Ron was always the one who was afraid of stuff.
It's when you're afraid that you can be brave.

>Even the was his family is portrayed suggested that they are diligent workers, not heroes.
His parents were in the Order of the Phoenix. Ron himself has dubious work ethic, Arthur and most of his sons just follow their passion when it comes to their job, and Ginny is your classic girl-with-an-attitude. Percy is considered the black sheep because he sucks up to his boss too much.
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>>51727475
Sure, and Hufflepuffs did stay and fight against Voldemort. I think sacrificing yourself for the good of the group aligns with... Hufflepuffian virtues, and either way, everyone had a mix of traits from all the houses. Saying "Ron is Gryffindorf because he was heroic" is only as relevant as saying "Ron is Hufflepuff because he'd like a simple life and taking it easy."
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>>51727511
Some Hufflepuffs.
Every Griffindor (Including ones that were too young and had to be individually pulled out), most Hufflepuffs, a handful of Ravenclaws, and literally no Slytherins stayed to help Hogwarts at the end.
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>>51727507
Do note that Order of the Phoenix was introduced later into the series and was basically "all the good guys here".
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>>51727546
>and literally no Slytherins

This was so retarded. I remember raging at shit like that in the last few books.
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>>51727511
>"Ron is Hufflepuff because he'd like a simple life and taking it easy."
Have we read the same books? One of Ron's character flaws is that he's insecure and wishes he could be in the spotlight like Harry always is.

Ron's main Hufflepuff trait is that he's loyal, but Hermione is even moreso. Hufflepuffs are diligent, Ron is like Harry in that he doesn't take school all that seriously. Hufflepuffs don't rock the boat and are the "nice" ones, Ron gets in fight with his friends all the time.

>>51727548
>"all the good guys here"
And Mondingus.
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>>51727586
>And Mondingus.
I... who was that guy? I'll admit, I don't remember him.
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>>51727632
He's basically a petty crook who just happens to be an OotP's member. I think you only hear about him whenever he fucks up a mission.
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>>51723364
This really fucking appeals to me.

Harry goes of with Ron and Hermione to have their adventures as per Vanilla because everybody Voldy, Dumbledore and the others all think he is the Chosen One because scar.

Meanwhile Neville Longbottom studies. He is quite angry. The cunt responsible for his parents condition and everything wrong with his life is back.

He would need cohorts.

Luna Lovegood to take the place of Hermione as the clever one. Her knowledge is fringe shit that the rest of the wizarding world thinks is insane. But she is dangerous, she has seen some shit, she doesn't have enough marbles left to feel fear and experiments. Experimenting in HP magic is dangerous for all involved but when it pays off it pays of big.

The Ron equivalent would be Fred and George. Why are they helping? At first pity. Afterwards because it's entertainment and excitement. After that because shit just got real. Also dropping a jocke shop darkness prank bomb in a room full of people is almost as good as an invisibility cloak.
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>>51727661
He was also constantly stealing stuff from headquarters and selling it on to collectors.
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>>51727692
Neville and Luna are kind of criminally underused in the series.
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>>51723688 (Hitler checked)
I think that calls for a sanity check.

>>51723900 (also checked
HPMOR became laughable when I did some research about Yudowsky, LessWrong, and his AI cult. Really stupid stuff.

>>51726878
>NAXALT, bro! I know one mudblood who's good at magic, therefore all of them are just as good as purebloods!
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>>51722342
Also Mad Eye Moody has a staff. But he has a wand too.
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>>51720732
>Even assuming Malfoy was genuinely nice to him, which is unlikely given the kind of person he was
This is the problem; there are actually two separate issues which get confused here, namely that Slytherin are the evil house and that Draco Malfoy personally is a right dickhead. Even with Potter in Slytherin Malfoy is still going to get pissy with him if he'd rejected their possible initial friendship because Malfoy is just a dick like that. Their entire school rivalry is because Harry snubbed him on the first day and Malfoy makes it last six years.

Given his fathers supposed role within society and his ties to people in power it's actually shocking how unsubtle Draco is about making useful friends in school and keeping his behaviour in check, hearing his son called one of Harry Potters friends a filthy little mudblood should have earned him the mother of all beatings when Lucius found out.
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>>51727763
> I know one mudblood who's good at magic, therefore all of them are just as good as purebloods!

Name one "Pureblood" who is better at magic than the best of the mudbloods of their generation?

Tom Riddle, Harry, and Hermione all have muggle blood in their veins, and don't have a lot of competition. The only character I can think of who was pureblood and notably awesome was maybe Dumbledore?
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>>51719976
You don't go there to discuss anything, it's nothing but hipsters masturbating over Endless Jest or Ulysses.
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>>51727559

Doesn't their house head lead a bunch of them back in mid-fight?
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>>51727916
Yeah, Dumbledore is both explicitly a pureblood and uncontroversially considered one of the greatest wizards alive in-universe.

Grindelwald might have been a pureblood too, though I'm not sure how much credence wizards give to that outside of Britain.
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>>51720151
>clips
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>>51719865
>literally Fanfiction.net: the thread
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>>51723900
HP and the Natural 20 is the best worst HP FanFic. Too bad its dead and that awful muggle sideplot took up so much time and space at the end/.
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>>51727992
Wizards are always going to be a little old-fashioned.
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>>51726020
You need to genuinely want someone to suffer for that curse to work, so yeah.
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>>51728059
The best HP fanfic is Seventh Horcrux anyway.
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>>51727916
On the top of my head, Bellatrix Lestrange, Alastor Moody and Sirius Black aren't too bad pure-blood wizards for instance.
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>>51726842
>alloys are stronger

Just like real life, then
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>>51728125
>>51728059
There are a lot "best worst" HP fanfics in existence, because just so many amateur fanfic writers entirely misunderstand how to write an engaging plot. Instead they either drop a setting infodump, or get untangled in meaningless relationship drama that has little place in a highschooler's life - much less that of 11-year old, which is a popular place for many writers to start their story.
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>>51728414
*entangled
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>>51727559

Rowling did later on say she regretted how irredeemably shitty all of the Slytherins acted. It really says something when the only one even close to a decent human being was Severus fucking Snape.
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>>51728623
Snape was on the side of good, but decent he was not. The closest a Slytherin get to someone you'd actually want as a friend is Slughorn, and the guy still sucks.
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>>51727735
I would like to see a film from Luna's perspective.

Admittedly there would be a dearth of childlike wonder and whimsy but there would be distorted Sin City graphics and an internal monologue not quite in kilter with how everybody else reaches conclusions. Also lots of Family Guy/Scrubs style throw away flashes in the same odd style that make it hard for the audience to follow what is actually happening in the feet-on-the-ground reality. Also hard for her.

Also it would be a bleak slog through a dangerous institution to master the forces that killed her mother rather an an adventure of a magical school. Where she spent the better part of a decade being mercilessly bullied to the concern of seemingly none of the teachers or staff.

And then she gets kidnapped and gets to spend some time at Malfoy Manor.
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>>51720151
Wrong country.
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>>51728914

I want to see a set of Sequels covering Luna's post-hogwarts life. A distinguished veteran of Dumbledor's Army that fought at the battle of hogwarts... who spends most of her time researching things no one else thinks are real and dealing with problems that even other wizards generally dismiss as being faery tales.

When you have a dark wizard on the loose, threatening to take over the world? Call the Aurors, Potter himself might show up to that.

But when your house is infested with femstrobes or some other little-known bullshit, who is going to believe you but Luna Lovegood?

9 times out of 10, the things she investigates are complete nonsense. But it wouldn't take much at all for her to get embroiled in a problem that is growing rapidly out of control specifically because the rest of the wizarding world doesn't see the threat coming.

She is the perfect combination of eccentric character to make the story interesting, weird enough to get involved with unbelievable situations, and with the backstory to justify being incredibly cool under pressure and able to deal with this before it gets worse.
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>>51727805
I was going to say how Mad-Eye and Dumbledore could probably channel magic through a ring pop if they really wanted too, but then my mind went off the rails and now I can't stop imagining how ridiculous everything would be if they used Twizzlers to channel their magic instead of wands.
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>>51728103

Reminder even though wizards have existed alongside Muggles for the entirety of human history their newspaper still had to explain what a gun was.
>>
>>51729125
Instead they made a movie about another eccentric fetching animals.
>>
>>51723848
Except conservation of matter is broken so hard.
>>
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>>51728059
>awful muggle sideplot
Heard you were talking shit. That was the best part of the whole thing.
>>
>>51729125
I'd rather see Call of Cthulhu: Luna edition.
>>
>>51729248
Yes. Spells break physics. Who the fuck woulda thought?
>>
>>51720732
>even Hermione does, which is kind of odd.
she knew spells before she got to hogwarts, she obviously did her homework on the whole "wizarding world" thing
>>
>>51730219
This. By the time she started she basically had the entirety of Hogwarts' history memorized so it doesn't surprise me she recognized someone who was basically a living folk hero.
>>
>>51719865
It certainly would have made Slytherin more interesting.
I would have honestly have cut out Luna's role in Book 5 and included a Slytherin member in the DA. Everyone hates her, they suspect she's going to turn on them, they all think she's the leak. She goes to the Ministry at the end to prove to them she's really invested in this.
>>51730816
>>51730219
Bullshit. She'd never even heard of "Mudblood" before her second year.
This is like being African, doing a ton of research into American culture in preparation for immigration (including recent events and political upheavals), spending an entire year in America, and ONLY THEN hearing the word "nigger" for the first time after being called it but not knowing what it means.
>>
>>51724293
>>51722494
It's canon that wands are a Eurowizard thing, other cultures have their own foci. African wizards don't even use foci at all.
>>
>>51722045
>The hat wouldn't give a dick about whom he knew,
but it did... the Sorting hat even said he was a good fit for slytherin, it only put him in griffindor because he was saying to him self "not slytherin, not slytherin" over and over again, and he was only doing that because of what Ron told him.
>>
>>51722342
>Lucius Malfoy had a cane that he concealed his wand in.
Only in the movie, because Jason Isaacs thought a sword-wand-cane was fucking sick. The long flowing locks and the murder attempt at the very end of movie 2 were his idea too.
>>
>>51723517
Harry's a magic jock. His only real skills are sports and fighting.
I love Ron, because god damn his suffering is so honest.
>>
>>51719865
Isn't this the premise of one of the longest and largest running pieces of fan fiction ever?
>>
>>51728059
>awful muggle sideplot

I would tell you to go back to goodreads, but they shouldn't have to put up with you either.
>>
>>51731035

>Bullshit. She'd never even heard of "Mudblood" before her second year.

I'm pretty sure she had and she was immensely offended and hurt when Malfoy called her that. IIRC the only there in the dark was Harry.
>>
>>51731100
>murder attempt was his idea

was a bad idea. the flowing locks were good though
>>
>>51731381
In the movie she knows, but I'm not sure about the book.
>>
>>51731682
Even if she hadn't known the word, it's not the kind of thing you'd learn in the kind of books Hermione would read.
You're not going to find the word Nigger in most history books or school textbooks.
>>
>>51722676
dumbledore doesnt care about you if you're not in gryffindor
>>
>>51732743
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3OyAnhDO9v4
>>
Slytherin Harry would just have more emphasis on Cunning and Manipulation, and probably be more willing to exploit all the resources at his disposal even if it makes him look like a total asshole.

Draco or maybe another less fleshed out Slytherin would probably end up playing the Hermione if the real girl doesn't show up or an heros herself due to merciless mocking from slytherins and no Harry Potter Hero of the Magical World there to back her up. Draco's clever enough to Rival Harry Fucking Potter for most of the books, even if he's not Hermione smart. And being a pureblood, he knows through osmosis what Hermione had to study, so he's got enough of a leg up he could fill the role fairly well.

Draco also comes with two dumb brutes packed with muscle, bringing our squad total up to four, which brings tactics into play a lot more than in vanilla. Harry and Draco learning where to put Crabbe and Goyle would probably take the place of at least one bullshit asspull by Dumbledore, since positioning is key in tactical combat. But they don't really fill the role of Ron.

For our Slytherin Party Ron, it'd either be Pansy (Kind of a bitch, not great at classes, but lacks the Ron loyalty unless character development happens) or some nameless, like Daphne Greengrass or Blaise Zabini. Since we don't know much about them, they could plausibly take the Ron role of providing general support and kid-on-the-street issues.

Party is still sub-par though. What do you guys think? Should we look into branching into Ravenclaw for Luna, or Hufflepuff for our Ron? We want to keep a sort of balance here - as Slytherins, numbers rule, and it'll be a lot more tactical than the FPS-like fights Gryffindor!Harry had with his small team, but at the same time, we don't need to have 60 gorillion characters, either. 5-7 is probably a good amount, and allows for a bit in the way of XCOM extras to die in every battle without killing off our MCs.
>>
>>51732416

Isn't it also kind of an archaism which was only making it's way back because a lot of Death Eaters found their way into positions of political power?
>>
>>51724128

It's not a stated rule though.

Magic in the HP universe was always treated more as a talent than a power.

Also, we don't know how's the percentage of squibs (Wizard-born muggles) in other countries or even outside England.

The British wizard community was shown to be rather traditional and quite possibly non-magical relatives of wizards would not be mentioned or, if you are a pureblood fanatic, even exiled from the family or even killed.
>>
>>51728414
>Relationship drama that has little place in a highschooler's life
>Relationship drama has little place in a highschooler's life
>Highschooler has little drama
>DELICIOUS ALCOHOL

Dear god what highschool did you go to? Drama is LITERALLY ALL TEENAGERS ARE GOOD AT unless they focus ENTIRELY on studies and even then drama rules everything because that makes you a nerd, and thus a target for drama.
>>
>>51728841

Slughorn is a honest lazy man. He wants comfort and gifts, but he's not willing to be a crook to get those.

He's the type of ambition people in Slytherin used to be about. People that want more than most, but know that you shouldn't go outside the proper channels to get those.

Also, despite being kind of a bigot, he puts some effort to actually understand people he'd usually not care for.
>>
I might as well ask here.
I never watched the HP movies and didn't read the books growing up, is this still worth getting into as a 20 year old?
>>
>>51733867
That depends. Do you have any remote hope of having a girlfriend that enjoys /tg/ and /tg/-adjacent interests? If so, you need to have read them at least once, possibly thrice.
>>
>>51733867

Books are fun and easy to read, if a little shallow. The characters are all pretty interesting and it's really fun to see them grow up in front of you. Rowling's worldbuilding falls kinda flat when you start scrutinizing it but unless you're a turbo-autist that shouldn't be a problem.


Also as >>51733896 says a lot of girls are into it so that's always a plus. Don't worry though it's not a "chick thing".
>>
>>51733489
>Dear god what highschool did you go to?
[blogpost alert]

A STEM-focused lyceum, but that's not the point.
True enough, there was some drama happening around, but me? I was busy buddying it up with my two best friends and having mindless fun and learning shit I actually liked. Trust me, neither highschool, not college, nor university, nor any other place is about drama if you simply don't give a shit.

Maybe I just grew up quickly, but at some point I realized that worrying about meaningless shit - like whether a girl that passed you an eraser likes you, or whether other kids don't like you because they keep remembering that awkward thing that happened years ago - all of this shit simply doesn't matter.

The bullied kid will grow up to be a Nobel laureate, while the bully will spend the rest of his life working at a carwash.
The high-and-mighty beauty queen will grow up to be a slag that whores herself for money to older men, while a quiet mouse of a girl in nerdy square-rimmed eyeglasses that no one pays attention to will become a beautiful loving housewife.

The school simply teaches you how to deal with various social situations. Hell, I don't even contact those buddies I made back in highschool, because I simply don't care anymore by this point. The best and most fun friends I've made were those I've made while I was studying during the later years of uni - the people who finally stopped being children that saw studying as something of a chore and finally realized that life is all about doing what you actually want - not momentary whims, mind you, but actual long-term goals. The people who were responsible for themselves and provided things for themselves.
>>
>>51733867
It's a pretty damn good series, though it doesn't really do anything innovative.

It's worth reading for the fanfiction alone. As a law of the internet, 90% of anything is shit, and 95% of anything popular is shittier, but even that remaining 5% is like 100 fics. Tvtropes helps separate the stuff worth looking at from the stuff not, and things like HPMOR (Harry Potter as written by a rationalist autist) and Oh God Not Again (HP as a comedy with a few actually interesting insights into the series) are also worth checking out, assuming you can withstand it. Not to mention Alexandra Quick, the series I can never finish but love a lot, is a HP fanfic.

I want to fuck the anti-villainy out of Alexandra Quick.
>>
>>51731100
>tfw rewatching CoS
>Lucius starts speaking avada kedavra
>ohshitnigga.jpg
>>
>>51734228

>the bully will spend the rest of his life working at a carwash.
>The high-and-mighty beauty queen will grow up to be a slag that whores herself for money to older men

Are there still people who actually tell themselves this?

I know sometimes it's true but I always had a real issue with this kind of mindset. It's remarkably mean-spirited and petty to just assume because someone has something going for them now and you don't means they've used up their good graces and are doomed to a life of mediocrity and depression.

It's amazing you think you were free from high school drama when you apparently defined yourself with self-aggrandizing revenge fantasies.
>>
>>51734267
The point isn't that they will get some sort of magical divine karmic revenge. The point is that nothing you actually do socially during highschool matters, and just because you are successful or unsuccessful during this phase of your life doesn't mean you will automatically remain so later in your life.
Highschool is nothing more than a social playground that completely loses its meaning as soon as you get through it. You will never speak or meet those people again, and if you will - it won't matter, because you have your own life to get on with, and they have their own respectively.
>>
Shitty company but cool miniature and one good game.
Should I go for it?
>>
>>51734306

>five years later and still friends with buds from high school
>we bond over our college experiences and career goals

Sounds like you were just prickly.
>>
>>51734335
And you can bond just the same with literally anyone if you spend a bit of time with each other, far less time than the amount you spent together in highschool, mind you.
Can you truly claim that any of those friends you made in highschool are irreplaceable? Hell, maybe you even can, aberrations in statistics happen, but judging from my personal observations and experiences of my acquaintances, that doesn't happen often.
>>
>>51734352

>statistics
>derived from personal observations

Why do I need to justify my friendships to you, internet robo-man? All I'm saying is you sound like you have a pretty big stick up your ass in the way you're rationlizing why you apparently weren't that popular in high school.
>>
>>51723598
>Aunt Petunia's sister, whom was a muggle.
She was a squib, meaning a non-magical person in a wizard family.

You could still have a squib in a pure blood family.
>>
>>51734383
Eh, it's fun to argue about meaningless shit. "Someone on the internet doesn't agree with me" and all that.
>>
>>51734419

Lily's family were all Muggles. Apparently they were pretty wigged out by it, especially when Lily was very young and hadn't gotten the Hogwarts letter yet.
>>
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>>51734228
>The bullied kid will grow up to be a Nobel laureate, while the bully will spend the rest of his life working at a carwash.
>The high-and-mighty beauty queen will grow up to be a slag that whores herself for money to older men, while a quiet mouse of a girl in nerdy square-rimmed eyeglasses that no one pays attention to will become a beautiful loving housewife.

What usually happens is the "successful" people in school go on to become successful adults, while the nerd outcasts continue to be nerd outcasts.
>>
>>51730028
>>51729248
it's easier to break the rules if you know what they are
>>
>>51734419
No, the squib was the local crazy cat lady who Dumbledore installed as a way to covertly keep an eye on the Durseleys, but for some reason, old Albus never once did a damn fucking thing, nor let her do anything, in over a decade of flagrant child abuse and active neglect. Sterling goddamn father figure, that man.
>>
>>51734694

IIRC the Durselys' was the one place where Harry was totally hidden from Voldemort, at least until he turned 17. Maybe Dumbledore figured if he pushed too hard the Dursleys would eventually throw the kid out and like it or not he needed Harry there.
>>
Harry Potter is good and all, but why the fuck did this never get a tenth of its recognition?

Bartimaeus was the shit. Niggas don't know about magical oligarchies.
>>
>>51735174
Mah Nigga.

Shittest ending though. That made it onto my list of literary infamy just because of that.
>>
>>51734965
It was described as an ancient magic, an unbreakable law. No matter what Voldemort did or tried to do, as long as Harry lived with the Dursleys, he was completely untouchable while there by Voldemort or any who served him.

Tom Riddle could have burned down the entire street, and the Dursleys house would be untouched.
>>
>>51720151
>Potter
>poor kid
>from a muggle family.
Listen, if you don't know the source material, don't fucking comment.

In the wizarding world, people though of him as a Potter: that is to say, from a high pedigree and insanely fucking rich.
>>
>>51735174
Oh fuck yeah Bartimaeus.

Shame the fanfic.net listing is 90% Bart getting romantic with Nate. I mean come on, I know he doesn't really have a gender, but he also never expressed interest in humans at all through the whole book and in fact /explicitly stated otherwise/.

Besides, what's wrong with a good vitriolic best buds + cute rebellious girl set-up? Don't fuck with the formula man!
>>
>>51720151
>assault rifle
>clips
REEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
On the Way to Greatness is probably the best fanfic that plays this straight, if anyone is interested.
>>
>>51735640
There's a hermione slytherin one, applied cultural anthropolgy(?) that's also pretty good.
>>
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>>51735174
Re-read them last year.
>>
>>51731135
what fanfic?
>>
>>51729125
Yeah I'd be down for occult detective story in HP world.
Luna was best girl anyway.
>>
>>51735174
Hell yeah. Heroes of the Valley was also pretty dank.
>>
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>>51733867

No, honestly it is one of the dullest franchises in history. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.
>>
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SO: Harry Pooter in Slytherin, I hear you ask?

On the Way to Greatness:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4745329/1/On_the_Way_to_Greatness

This is the most 'realistic' Harry is put in Slytherin facfic. It's got lots of deep, intricate plotting, and Harry's life in Slytherin is hell, but you can see him struggle and overcome...most of the time.

The aforementioned They Shook Hands:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7659033/1/They-Shook-Hands-Year-1-New-Version

This is a weird one, wherein Harry is sorted into Slytherin...and they're not that bad. Like, not even canonically bad. Like, they're just sneakier Hufflepuffs, really.

What would Slytherin Harry do?
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3559907/1/

A few short stories about what a Slytherin Harry would do in certain situations.

Then there's fics where Harry is a girl:
Pureblood Pretense:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7613196/1/
Wherein Harriet can only go to Hogwarts as her male cousin. Get's sorted into Slytherin. Has an insane work schedule, and has many amusing plots and counter plots.

Mary Potter:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11437578/1/

Alright, kind of. Well written, just kind of blah.

Well, there's some Twin Fics:

Arc of Sacrifices:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/2580283/1/Saving-Connor

It's about Harry and his Twin Connor. It's full of ridiculous purple prose, and Harry is a somewhat unlikeable sociopath, but the magic system, lore, and the magical world is amazing. Worth the read, if you can slog through solid paragraphs of psychological brain fighting.

Harry Potter and the Prince of Slytherin
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11191235/1/

Brilliant, well written fanfiction wherein Harry is sent to the Dursleys, and then get's notified that he has a twin and his parents are alive. Trust me, it's better than it sounds, and the author has long-reaching plots, plans and turns plot holes into plot points. Unfortunately when Trump was elected, they became so butthurt that they stopped.
>>
>>51736931
fuck you, i just tabbed over from /tv/ and the first fucking thing i see is this pasta fuck off
>>
>>51736965

For me personally I like things in addition to the 'Twin' thing, like plot, character directions and so on - hence why I also chucked in the Fem-harry stuff as well. For instance, there''s a Harry goes to Slytherin fanfic somewhere where Tom RIddle get's pulled out of Ginny's head early in the second year, and she ends up becoming a weird blur of Ginny and Tom Riddle. As in, a Ginny with Tom Riddle's male urges and his increased intelligence anc charisma. Hilarious Lesbian shenanigans are implied to occur, all the while the main cast carry on completely obliviious to it.

Arc of Sacrifices ins the insanely long running one. It has some REALLY good ideas, like Voldemort being a genuinely evil guy who Harry is always, ALWAYs fighting against. You get the feeling that there's a whole world and factions and wars and rise and falls going on all around the main cast. But it's awfully purple prosey. Very very purple prosy.

Prince of Slytherin also does some brilliant subversion of a lot of things that happen in fanfiction and the canon fiction. If you like fanfiction / Harry Potter in general, you'll like this one if you can get past the twin thing - possibly the only time I've seen Peter Pettigrew as a legitimate threat.

So it's less specific to a plot summary, and more the stuff that get's put into it.
>>
>>51737049
>where Tom RIddle get's pulled out of Ginny's head early in the second year, and she ends up becoming a weird blur of Ginny and Tom Riddle. As in, a Ginny with Tom Riddle's male urges and his increased intelligence anc charisma. Hilarious Lesbian shenanigans are implied to occur, all the while the main cast carry on completely obliviious to it.
Fire up those neurons anon, I know you can remember.
>>
>>51737049
Eh, I'm probably not deep enough into that pool to stomach new integral characters. If it's played straight I need my fanfic to be a bit more connected to the source material, but I might look into Prince of Slytherin.
But speaking of fanfiction, are there any good Luna ones?
>>
>>51737154

Unfortunately, not really. Which sucks. All the usual Luna ones are crack comedy fics. I cannot remember off the top of my head a decent, serious Luna Lovegood story. Prince of SLytherin does a good Luna, Oh God Not Again does a cracky Luna, Luna Lovegood, Lechery and Larceny isn't that good - good ideas but crap execution... it's a damn shame. I would love to see a Luna Lovegood story in a similar vein to a certain fanfiction from another fandom...https://www.fimfiction.net/story/296863/the-adventures-of-batsy-fluffentuft-the-magnificent.

Seriously, Luna Lovegood going around with THAT mindset in the Harry Potter world would be comedy gold, but alas we must perservere without it.
>>
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>>51737194
>ponyshit
Allow me to disregard everything you've so far said
>>
First, holding my hand up, I am not 100% familiar with everything Potter-related, but from what I know, Draco is not really all that evil. He's an arrogant jerk-wad and something of a bully, but a lot of that seems to be due to his upbringing by former Death Eaters. As I recall even after years of having his bad side fed by his parents and 'friends' in slytherin, and Harry Potter butting heads with him, and the blatant favouritism shown to Harry by Dumbledore, he still can't bring himself to kill Dumbledore when sent to do so by Voldemort.

It's possible that had he and Harry become friends on the train then he might just have become a better person all round
>>
>>51737477
You'd be right, that's why he gets the redemption thing in the first place.
His true personality is all the more confirmed by Cursed Child which, whatever you might think of it, is still canon. He isn't fond of Harry even then, but is at least rational and willing to work together.
Draco's behaviour was an unfortunate result of bad surroundings when all he really wanted was to coast through life quietly with his family wealth.
>>
>>51737154
>>51737194
You seem to be uneducated, have this for Luna;
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/2889350/1/Bungle-in-the-Jungle-A-Harry-Potter-Adventure
>>
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>>51737562
>all he really wanted was to coast through life quietly with his family wealth

Truly he was the american dream, despite being british
>>
>>51719865

Time for alt history where he joins Slytherin AND malfoy is genderbent aka lovely tiamet.

Gg.
>>
>>51738086
>malfoy is genderbent

Nah

Malfoy was pretty gay for Harry
>>
>>51738108
Stop reading slashfiction
>>
>>51735174
Shame he seems to be done writing them. Ring of Solomon was fantastic.
>>
>>51731089
Do Americans use gunwands?
>>
>>51734419
She was a muggle with muggle parents who acted like a squib in the face of her very magical sister. The sole reason she's so bitter about magic is that she never got a letter from Hogwarts after hearing about her sister's magical school adventures.
>>
>>51739793
Not in canon
>>
>>51727055
>she couldn't figure how to have Ron befriend a Slytherin Harry.
Did she never watch "the breakfast club"?

>>51727417
Courage iis taking action despite your fears
>>
>>51720151
>it's not /tg/-related in any way.

They are making a board game of harry potter so expellifuckinarmus anon
>>
>>51727559

Didn't Horace Slughorn stay and fight? And he was definitely Slytherin.
>>
>>51720151
>Lets be honest, Harry would have been bullied so bad he'd be the kid showing up to the school dance with a rifle and bandoleer of pistols and ammo mags

Fixed

I love the idea, how do we develop it?
>>
>>51739793
I think she mentioned native American wizards, so tomahawks are on the table.
>>
>>51742845
Do they have cannonwands
>>
>>51743574
I'm pretty sure there were stereotypical Salem witches at the quiddich world cup.
>>
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>>51735174
Fuck year those books are my shit
>>
>>51743574
>ghost shirts
>nashadols
>enchanted arrows made of wand wood
>pensives that let you relive your dreams
Yas Queen! Sign me up.
>>
>>51743438

He was a Slytherin from a different time. When he told Harry he was a Slytherin he immediately recognized the sour look on Harry's face and told him at one point there were decent people in that House.

From what I can tell Slytherin overall backed away from its founder's more extremist beliefs and only began its slide back into "Neo Nazi Bully Club" when Tom Riddle came around.
>>
>>51746431
Wasn't that R.A.B. guy in Slytherin?

>the fuck was Rawling thinking with that shit tweest?
>>
>>51747228
>>51746431
Reminder that Merlin was in Slytherin.

Yes, that Merlin.
>>
>>51746431
>implying
Slughorn was a Slytherin who was a teacher when Tom Riddle was a student, and even he had his racist tendencies. Within a minute of talking to him Harry immediately clocks him as a typical Slytherin even though he protests otherwise.
>>
>>51746281
>Yas Queen!
Get the fuck out
>>51743583
Yeah, but even that was a joke about the UK. British Women's Institute became Salem Witches Institute.
>>51739793
Gunstaves, manufactured in secret by gun manufacturers.
>not having a Colt Phoenixkiller
>current year
>>
>>51733439
No word on that. Snape had been saying it pretty much since he fell in with the the DE crowd and NEVER STOPPED.

I mean, really. Ron was always getting talked down to by Hermione for not trusting Snape, and every time he asked "where's the proof he ever really switched sides" it's treated as a joke. But it's clear from his history (especially the Pensieve flashback) that yes, he never actually switched sides, it was always only ever about Lily. He was calling Hermione a Mudblood all the way into book 7, TO DUMBLEDORE'S FACE. He thought Hitler had the right idea, but oh no who would have thought he'd kill his Jewish crush oh nooooo
>>
>>51731381
>>51731682
>>51732416
In the book, everyone but Harry and Hermione react. All the Gryffindors get super pissed immediately, and the Slytherins immediately prepare for a fight, because that shit's fightin' words. This leads to Ron attempting to curse Malfoy and failing. While in Hagrid's cabin, Hermione says that it was obviously very rude but that she had no idea what it meant.
>>
>>51727661
>>51727703
He was basically there to be like "let's make sure we have all the info and agents we can, get the criminals involved if you have to"
>>
>>51746431
>slughorn
Oh please. Voldemort was at their fucking doorstep saying "little pigs, little pigs, let me in" and he was like "oh man I really hate to take sides also I'm a huge fucking opportunist whose really only out to save my own skin and remember that I do in fact know how to cast the Dark Mark" and McGonnagal is like "BITCH IF YOU SWITCH SIDES I'LL KILL YOU MYSELF"
>>
>>51733535
>Also, despite being kind of a bigot, he puts some effort to actually understand people he'd usually not care for.
You mean how he completely ignored Ron because he wasn't Special?
>>
>>51719865
There are literally hundreds, possibly thousands of fanfics based on that. I know, I used to read fanfic.

>>51722208
>>51727055
This on the other hand, is an idea I don't think I've ever seen. Harry, Ron, Hermione and Neville. Slytherin, Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff. Becoming friends and solving shit despite being in different houses.
That would be a much better book series.
>>
>>51723540
Best part: Harry's still in the know now, so he lets him do it. Manly tears and all.
>>
>>51734228
The Nobel laureate has no idea how to talk to people and gets no work. The car wash guy spends all day interacting with people, ends up making enough connections to buy the car wash, also 10 other car washes.
>>
>>51749815
You wish. You'll die washing cars.
>>
>>51749856
>being this bitter
Don't make me dump your books, dweeb
>>
>>51726842
They're like Sayajins. Or however the fuck you spell that, I'm high don't be mean. Vegeta and Nappa actually mused out loud about creating an army of their own half-breeds, but Vegeta didn't like the idea of hundreds of people with the potential to overtake him.
>>
>>51749936
In the Japanese, it's Saiya-jin. Jin means "people" or "race", they're from the planet Saiya.
In English, you would call them Saiyan (like Martian), as the official translations call them.
Or you can be like the rest of the dumb weebs and call them Saiyajins.
And yeah, no way was Vegeta allowing anyone to overthrow him. Thanks to him, the Saiyan race will dwindle and die.
>>
>>51724293
I believe you need a wand to apparate. Only house elves and a few others do it without one.
>>
>>51749511
Well, what he says is that it's funny how it sometimes happens that Muggle-borns become powerful wizards, and Harry snaps at him. I always thought that Harry interpreted the question as "ha ha funny how these dirt people occasionally become real men" but to me it always felt as though Slughorn was asking something along the lines of "isn't it remarkable that it doesn't seem to matter that they're Muggle-born?"
>>
>>51750432

This is a good point. The entirety of the series is from Harry's perspective, and he has a few (quite understandable, desu) prejudices against Slytherin. So it's possible he just kind of assumed everything Slughorn says is tinged with supremacist ego.

Slughorn's not a saint, but he's a far cry from the malevolent liars and petty bullies who seem to make up most of Slytherin.
>>
>>51750486
>>51750432
Yeah, no. Harry says that his best friend is muggleborn is the best wizard in the year, and Slughorn says "isn't it funny how that sometimes happens?"
He's saying it's unusual.
>>
>>51750499
It's probably unusual because children born into wizarding families have the benefit of an introduction to magic from a very early age, so they get a leg up on Muggle-borns who won't know at all.
>>
>>51750499

Just because he thinks it's unusual doesn't mean he's passing some kind of value judgement. This isn't like some /pol/tard flipping out at the thought a nigger being competent at something. As >>51750511 points out before Hogwarts gets a hold of them Muggleborns usually have no idea about magic beyond the weird occurrences they experience growing up. In Slughorn's lifetime, two of the most talented witches he's ever known (Lily and Hermione) were Muggleborn. Thinking that's unusual is a reasonable thought, if maybe a tad old-fashioned.

Bear in mind he doesn't really show any prejudice towards Hermione and like most teachers was pleased with her intellect. He just favored Harry because Harry got a leg-up from Snape's old potions notes.
>>
>>51734267
>>51734468
>>51749815
I'm guessing you're all Americans? I had a similar experience as >>51734228 where I just didn't give a fuck and kept to a few friends. The big guys really DID end up either working at the car wash or dropping out of university in the first year or so, then either becoming druggies or car washers themselves. Girls are 50/50, some of the more 'didn't give a shit' and timid ones went to university, some married rich old men and others are nobodies that I haven't heard from in years now.

In my case I don't even know if there was drama around us. When I think back, shit was mostly light-hearted and was all about epic meme pranks me and my buddies pulled on people. I mean, I caught bits of drama but never really thought about it much at the time since it didn't involve me.
>>
>>51749815
And the name of the Nobel laureate gets recorded in history and remembered for centuries, while no one remembers the name of the car washer after he dies. It's rather relative.
>>
>>51727837
What role in society? Lucius' political influence seems to solely come from bribe money, death eater friends in the ministry and threating people all of which causes him to progressively lose influence from Chamber onwards until he's a groveling loser cowering at Voldemort's amusement. If anything he seems far stupider than his son.
>>
>>51736931
all the "god tier" are shit
>>
>>51750883
>and was all about epic meme pranks me and my buddies pulled on people.
Jesus christ I'm cringing so hard my skin might crawl off my musculature
>>51750906
>centuries
Nobel Prizes have only be around for little over one century. Also, most Nobel laureates stay unremembered by most because no one really cares all that much. You hear about the ones who are already important or a big stink is made about them winning - Bob Dylan and Barack Obama are examples of both.
>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Nobel_laureates#Laureates
I guarantee the only people on this list people remember off the top of their heads are Dylan, Obama, King and Einstein. A lot of important Western authors won the Literature prize, but they aren't known for being Nobel Prize Laureates, they're known for being brilliant authors. I'll give you Peace Prizes, maybe, since those are political and people like to pull that shit out for political points. No one cares about anything else unless you're in the field.
>>
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>>51751035
SEETHING car washer detected.
>>
>>51751128
There's no Nobel prize for projection, anon.
>>
>>51735174
>thank you, Djinni, you are my greatest ally

Also, the old kingdom series was great YA fantasy that didn't pull any punches
>>
>>51751191
If we're going to talk about YA that didn't pull punches, you've gotta mention Animorphs. This shit was fucking brutal.
>>
>>51738086
Honestly, Malfoy fits the catty rich girl bully a lot more than the male stereotype.
>verbal put downs rather than physical ones
>mostly passive flaunting of wealth
>almost never gets in on the dirty work himself
>avoids physical contact like the plague, Despite having cronies to do it for him
>routinely gets the shit kicked out of him
Makes sense since him and Pansy were based on bullies in Rowling's school.
would have made a better romantic choice than Ginny as a grill
>>
>>51751306
>Drakeina being converted from cunt to tsuntsun by the power of halfblood cock
why didn't this happen, that would have been great
>>
>>51725856

It's like you forgot that Harry has some of Lord moldybutts power.
>>
>>51751323
>Harry Potter and the chamber of Descartes
>>
>>51751323
>tsundere femDraco
All of my yes.
>>
>>51751128

So much for your great education you dumb fuck. I guess it wasn't affluent enough to teach debate.
>>
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>>51751178
>>51751698
Still got more money than you.
>>
>>51751323
I'm pretty sure I've seen drawfaggotry of this somewhere.
>>
>>51723490
>You don't get to the final boss....if the company is broken two books ago though.
Is this an intentional Fellowship of the Ring joke?
>>
>>51750938
He's also on the Board of Governors for Hogwarts and before he was a Death Eater he created a fairly massive web of contacts and connections in the Ministry of Magic, largely through his access via Slughorn's club of "special" students.

He did lose a bit of influence after Voldemort fell the first time, since he had to call in several of those connections and favours to get out of his trial as a Death Eater, but primarily he wasn't actually loyal to Voldemort personally, more the cause in general, so he came out pretty clean minus the suspicion from people like Dumbledore.

Which is pretty funny in an ironic way. The Malfoy family wealth was actually built through Muggle connections. They got their family land from a grant given them by William the Conqueror, and spent a lot of time building that wealth by investing, Muggle currency, and so on and so forth. It wasn't until the Secrecy statue came in that they cut their Muggle ties and went full pure-blood.
>>
>>51723517
Ron is useful.

>Scrappy fighter, holds his own.
>Brings some important knowledge local regarding the magical world, as Harry knows nothing and Hermione only knows what she's read.
>Apparently better at chess than Hermione? Periodically demonstrates pretty good tactical sense, where Hermione gets too caught up in details and misses the nitty gritty

Admittedly, the least unique skillset in the party, but a necessary component.
>>
>>51727837
He did get told off for it according to the Potter wiki, but I have no idea if it's accurate:

>When his son returned home from his first year of Hogwarts, Lucius learned of Harry Potter’s refusal of Draco’s offer of friendship and allegiance to Ron Weasley, whose family had been anathema to the Malfoys for years, forcing Lucius to realise that the wild hopes of the ex-Death Eaters — that Harry Potter was another, and better, Voldemort — were completely unfounded. Despite the disappointment, Lucius nevertheless discouraged Draco from seeming ‘less than thrilled’ about the Potter boy, since open hostility towards the boy who ended the Dark Wizard to whom Lucius had supposedly been forced into servitude could prove potentially disadvantageous to their social standing.

It didn't seem to hold well, though he avoided showing himself as overtly disgusted at Harry in Chamber of Secrets right up until Harry took Dobby from him.
>>
>>51751864
In HP and the Nat20, I really liked that Lucius was absolutely terrified of Voldemort returning.

He already had the ministry in his pocket, and they were slowly but surely eliminating the Weasleys and their allies from the administration. The Dark Lord efforts to return put his enemies in high alert, and made the extremist idiots like Bellatrix come out of the woodwork, when he was basically ready to start safely passing anti-mudblood legislation in a few years.
>>
>>51751961
In fairness, once Voldemort did wind up returning in the series, he did pretty much that anyway. He didn't immediately go for broke, he took his time, gathered his forces, carefully infiltrated key positions.

If not for the Order of the Phoenix and ultimately the fight in the Ministry that straight-up revealed he was back (probably a bad move on Voldemort's part to show up there, but he didn't have a choice in the matter, he needed that prophecy), he could have taken over the Ministry with nobody really the wiser.

And then he could have begun to spread beyond Britain, since he barely seemed to move outside the UK and a little bit of Europe. Unlike Grindelwald, who was a worldwide threat and only avoided Britain (because Dumbledore), Voldemort seemed to be the opposite, he focused almost exclusively on Britain and barely even touched Europe, let alone America.
>>
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>>51751763
This might be what you're thinking of. There's a greentext somewhere but I don't have it.
>>
>>51734352
This is the most emotionally stunted and autistic thing I've read all day, bravo.
>>
Reminder:

>Harry becomes Head Auror by 26 and then Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement (but never does his paperwork)
>Ron becomes an Auror, then quits after two years to work at the Weasley joke shop and makes a fortune by the time he's thirty
>Hermione becomes Head of the Department of Magical Creatures, then Deputy Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, then Minister for Magic by the time she's forty

>Ginny becomes a star Quidditch player, then quits to raise a family with Harry and becomes the sports correspondent for the Daily Prophet, eventually head of the sports section
>Luna marries Newt Scamander's grandson
>Neville becomes an Auror, then retires after several years of badassery to become Herbology Professor at Hogwarts and (possibly) Head of Gryffindor
>>
>>51752523
Reminder that Voldemort, the man who canonically can't feel love, had a heterochronatic eyed daughter with Bellatrix with a name not far off Ebony D'arkness dementia way
>>
>>51752155
Who are the three in the bottom-right supposed to be?
>>
>>51752672
Neville, Ginny, and Luna is my guess.
>>
>>51752672
Neville, Ginny, Luna, duh.
>>
>>51752612
Playing the devil's advocate here but procreation doesn't require love. Concidering this is Voldemort he probably magicked his sperm to fertilise Bellatrix anyway.
It's still dumb though because why would he do that in the first place.
>>
>>51752738
>>51752740

Ah, I got Ginny and Luna but was having a hard time trying to figure out Neville.
>>
>>51752523
>>51752612
Reminder that the books went to shit after the Order of the Phoenix and the movies went to shit after the Chamber of Secrets.
>>
>>51752766
Fair point, but even considering that it's dumb, given that he also is absolutely obsessed with immortality, and children have been symbolic of accepting mortality ever since Oranos got his knackers cut off
>>
>>51752782
maybe, but OotP was a beautiful swansong of pragmatic storytelling.
>>
>>51731089
>It's canon that wands are a Eurowizard thing
Why would you do that? It shold be a gigantic tome or a staff or something like that, most mythological wizards in european cultures DONT USE WANDS
>>
>>51750576
>He just favored Harry because Harry got a leg-up from old potions notes
And because he's "collector" of people and contacts, and Harry is the most famous wizard of his generation - that's why Dumbledore uses Harry to recruit him, he knows someone of Slughorn's ambitions and preferences couldn't resist having The Boy Who Lived as a friend and contact - and the fact that he happened to be a whizz at potions made it even better, as did the fact that Harry would already be grateful about being able to take higher level potions study - it was a requirement for being an Auror, but Snape, being Snape, demanded Outstanding OWLs for anyone wishing to take it to NEWT level
>>
>>51722494
Reminds me of this guy.

http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Wizard_in_the_Leaky_Cauldron

A random schmuck in a pub, using wandless magic to stir his coffee while reading a book about time theory that hasn't yet been published as of the date he's seen reading it.
>>
>>51752787
I wouldn't be surprised if he just decided to give Bellatrix a fuck or three and didn't care about whatever might result.

>>51752955
Small, fairly easy to carry, easy to conceal.
>>
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>>51751719

Hahaha, bet you dont
>>
>>51752955
Because it wasn't pottermore thing, and Rowling never thinks before she posts there.
It's why you get dumb shit like Merlin being a slytherin, despite living centuries before Hogwarts would have been built
>>
>>51753008
To be specific, that edition of the book wasn't published at the time. A Brief History of Time was published in 1988
>>
>>51725856
Most people seem to forget that Harry has suffered an insane amount of emotional abuse for the majority of his life. That does things too you. Everybody always talks shit on how Harry seems like an idiot sometimes but can you really blame him when his best friends were spiders?
>>
>>5175308
>>51753008
>foreshadowing time turners by having a wizard abuse time travel to read a brief history of time

ROWLING DOES IT AGAIN
>>
>>51753115
Yes such horrid abuse such as living in cupboard and being forced to cook
Truly a thing that gets to national TV
>>
>>51752155
femdraco has awoken my basilisk.
>>
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>>51753139
No love and care restricted to the bare minimum.
Underfed, bullied and neglected. Deprived of everything at the expense of your cousin who literally gets anything he wants while you are forced to toil all day after you come home from school, where you're ostracized, else you won't get fed tonight.
>>
>>51753206
Try laying off these fanfics for a while and reading the books
>>
>>51749729

He wasn't TALENTED. He gave ginny lots of attention because he considered her and later hermione promising future great wizards.

Ron was never the best in anything, anon. He is a great person, but talented or specially hard-working he ain't.

I meant in a way that he doesn't let his old implied prejudice of muggle-borns stop him from helping students he judged talented.

He plays favourites, no doubt, but he weighs in more than just family ties and political power when doing so.
>>
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>>51752782
>the movies went to shit after chamber of secrets
Fuck you
Prisoner of azkaban is the best hp movie.
>>
>>51750045

Weeeeell. Super seems to be debunking it now.
>>
>>51753212
Maybe you should go read them. This is all explicitly given as information of Harry's childhood prior to receiving the letter.
>>
>>51749355
For some reason I assumed merlin predated the founders
>>
>>51753328
He does if we take that the welsh legends are true in HP world. But Rowling just pulls things out her ass when it comes to "extended universe" shit. Most likely she got the dates mixed up because Arthur supposedly lived in like 6th century while the literary source is from 12th, which is when Hogwarts would also exist.
>>
>>51753080
>merling
>slytherin
nigger what? Plus i want to see how they put that fucker merilin in a school, he outclassed like everyone in magic even in arthurs legends
>>
>>51753438
As the other anon said, it's just stuff she pulls out of her ass to feed the drones as trivia.

>>51753184
There's a grand total of one R34 image of it for you to find that isn't TG.
Consider finding it your grail quest
>>
>YOU CAN BE A COOL GUY, A HUGE NERD, A RACIST
>OR THIS ASSHOLE NAMED HUFFLEPUFF

Harry Potter is a pretty retarded series with terrible world building
>>
>>51749548
>Cold Phoenixkiller

I've never been that /k/, but I'm intrigued. Nay, interested.
>>
>>51753481
the worldbuilding is not bad, the problem is, it's not abd when rowling is not worldbuilding, there is some interesting shit in the HP universe, there is some blantly retarded shit.
>>
>>51752523
>Reminder J.K. thought Ron/Hermione endgame was a mistake

Even authors make shitty fanfics from time to time.
>>
Merlin probably is immortal and went into the school one time just for lulz and to see what the fuck those retards are doing, magic is not for the masses. And they made a big deal out of it and it transformed into him actually attending it, like the legends usually do.
>>
>>51753561
Rowling is a massive flipflopping hack
>>
>>51753591
>hold the fuck up, Salazar. Are you telling me your monster will rely on a plumbing system that won't be built for hundreds of years to attack people?
>Jesus Christ, I need to get back to Avalon and tell Nimue this shit.
>>
>>51753638
i'd love a series where calssical mages apear in the HP universe and have to make seans of the whole thing
>what the fuck do you mean i cant show my powers to humans?
>how the hell am i to advise the king then?!
>why the fuck is that giant rasing dragons, where are all the knight that slay dragons gone?
>>
Does anyone have that classic image where it compares what the Hogwarts Houses 'should' be with what they actually are via using mostly anime characters to represent it?

So like it has the blonde manager dude from Eyeshield 21 as what slytherinis are meant to be, and then Biff and his bullies from Back to the Future as what they actually are in canon.

Would post it myself but my laptop is in the shop.
>>
>>51753227
>They completely cut out the Quidditch arc and inter-group drama between Harry, Ron, and Hermione after Harry got a Firebolt half-way through the year when his Nimbus gets smashed by the Whomping Willow and instead give it to him at the end.
Because they really wanted Sirius to come off as a thankful and loving Godfather rather than a creepy-stalker and loving Godfather?
>>
>>51753658
>what the fuck do you mean i cant show my powers to humans?
>how the hell am i to advise the king then?!

That development only happened during the witch hunts IIRC. Before that, it was okay, most just didn't because of convenience.
>>
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>>51753842
>Be Spanish Inquisitor.
>Out hunting Witches all day.
>Drag a wiry looking fellow out of his house because his neighbor claimed she saw him doing magic.
>Tie him up to a pole and set him fire.
>He starts screaming like he should.
>Start to walk away.
>Pause.
>mfw the bastard starting giggling instead because he thinks I'm out of earshot.
>>
>>51753842
it's still quait retarded, i mean, imagine the shit you can do with both magick and technology. Plus, it will only be so long before technology will be able to detect magic and counter it, it make a lot more seans to coexist
>>
>>51729151
>Book 5, Battle in the Ministry
>Voldemort and Dumbledore slugging it out with magic
"Expelliarmus!"
>You Know Who's wand flies from his hand
>Dumbledore hurls a single wand towards him
>Time slows, camera zooms on wand's handle inscribed with WWW
>Wave of his wand, 50 joke wands land and scatter around the dark lord's
>Voldemort lunges for his, points it at Albus
"Avada *MEEEEEP*
>He Who Must Not Be Named is holding a bike born.
"What's the matter Tom, I thought you were a clever wizard?"
>Dumbledore summons wand after wand from the floor, it turns into a rubber chicken, a lollipop, a flashlight, Ribbon, etc
>The headmaster casts a spell, wand malfunctions but the spell goes off flawlessly, drops and snags the next joke wand.
>Curses go to hexes go to jinxes until Dumbledore is casting petty spells on Voldemort out of joke wands
>Voldemort trying to find his wand amidst fakes while suffuring from jelly legs, or trying to see past rapidly growing hair
>Finally finds his wand and attacks
>Dumbledore deflects it casually as his wand turns into a bowling pin.
"Oh, we're still dueling? Tom, I'm just better than you, go home."
>>
>>51753819
>they really wanted Sirius to come off as a thankful and loving Godfather rather than a creepy-stalker and loving Godfather
Yeah, Sirius as a creepy stalker made a lot of sense, though he was okay in the film

Thinking about Sirius, the day the Potters died must have been absolute hell for him - he's the only person alive who knew Pettigrew, not himself, was the Secret Keeper (in fact, he convinced them to make it so, for whatever reason - maybe because he did a lot more front line fighting, or maybe because he couldn't handle the responsibility), and we know he was at their house, because he gave Hagrid (who said he retrieved Harry) his motorbike - Hagrid says he borrowed it, but I can see Sirius saying something like "I won't need it where I'm going"
.
At the time he knew his friend had either had the secret location gotten out of him, or had betrayed James and Lily.
And then it's mentioned that when he checked Pettigrew's bolt-hole there was no signs of a struggle, so that's when it went from a desperate search to a furious hunt.
>>
>>51754136
>he convinced them to make it so, for whatever reason
Sirius said that he expected Voldemort to come after him, thinking that *he* was the Secret Keeper. He figured no one expected that Pettigrew was actually the one, and that it would be safer that way.
>>
>>51719976
You can discuss whatever book you want as long as you state in the OP that the series is shit. Doesn't matter what series or book it is, just state that it's shit and you'll get some discussion about it.

>>51719865
Potter would probably be a great manipulator, but he was not really all that ambitious. You have to remember that that's what Slytherin is all about. Ambition, getting to the top (no matter the cost sometimes). Assuming potter was ambitious enough to be sorted into Slytherin (like you said, maybe he hung out with Malfoy on the train and was influenced), I still think he would have opposed Voldemort. If only because it was Voldemort who tried killing him in the first place, and Potter's ambition that got him into Slytherin would likely be Voldemort's downfall. I feel as if Potter would have been more of an anti-hero in this case, however.
>>
>>51754136
And on top of all that, the Potters were basically family to him. I was even mentioned that Sirius and James were so close that you'd think they were brothers and Sirius spent a lot of time at James' place during their summer vacation (James' parents, from what I remember, even treated Sirius as a second son like how Molly treated Harry as if he were her own). So, he basically not only lost his best friend and Lily but essentially lost people he considered his family as well.
>>
>>51754160
That's the one - I haven't read the series in full for a long-ass time now.

I'd love to see a short story or something about the last day of the war and the aftermath from multiple points of view

Also wonder what Dumbledore was doing - he told Hagrid (who told McGonagall) to retrieve Harry and meet him in Surrey, but what was old Dumbles doing?

Maybe getting in touch with all the other Order members and cells? Doing strategic shit when a good percentage of the Death Eater's forces power had vanished in a single hit?
>>
>>51753438
>Plus i want to see how they put that fucker merilin in a school
Everybody starts somewhere, anon. I think it was probably in part Rowling trying to give Slytherin something, they get a pretty shitty rap for 90% of the books.
>>
>>51753895
>that greentext literally happened more than once in universe with wizards who decided to fuck with the Muggles
>>
>>51754405
slithering get a shitty rap because rowling is a shitty writer and decided to make a whole house of assholes, everyone in slytherin is a fucking asshole, it's a house of rich torys in a boarding school filled mostly with middle class kids
>>
>>51754405
Merlin's childhood magic would have made riddle look like a little bitch
>riddle
Scares kids, mains animals and steals shit

>Merlin
Divines the presence of two dragons and gets his magical rival executed

You don't fuck with Merlin
>>
I've never really seen the point of Harry inheriting so much money. He never does anything significant with it and it just adds to the sense that everything is handed to him.

I guess it's part of the wish-fulfillment aspect that plagues YA lit?
>>
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>>51753746
>>
>>51754608
It was mainly there for plot convenience and, I assume, as insurance in case Rowling wrote herself into a corner.

You'll note that any time Harry needs something minor, like a book, it's always covered without having to get into any details.
>>
>>51754608
Mostly >>51754921 with a bit of wish fulfilment, but also provides contrast between the artificial enforced poverty at the Dursley's with Harry's real situation, and is a little more fuel for Ron's inferiority complex.
In the first book it also tells us that Harry's parents weren't the layabouts he'd been led to believe.
>>
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Christ I can't believe Sluggy Freelance is still ongoing?
>>
>>51756132
Jesus Christ it is?

I stopped reading about the time the ayylmao turned into a hot chick and then an evil boss

Christ simpler times
>>
>>51754680
I can feel the teenage autism radiating off of this image, and even now hear the sound of linkin park playing in the background
>>
>>51756246
The Harry Potter fan works over the years are an absolute goldmine of early and current internet cringe.
The shipping wars in particular were glorious to behold.
>>
>>51756246
That doesn't stop it from being altogether accurate
>>
>>51756525
Isn't the worst part that the author is involved in the most vocal part of the shipping wars, which involves her "self insert" character, that she was first firm in which couples ended the series together but then flipped to the opposite after time was passed?

Was it just a marketing move to try and reignite it?
>>
>>51756246
funny thing is, the hp fandome is mainly built by autistic women, i know two of them and they are both the very worst of kpop loving female autists. Why is harry potter so popular with females?
>>
>>51756590
Probably.
She has the tendency to make her most inflammatory comments at times when Potter hype is at a low.
It makes me think that once the 5(!) fantastic beasts films are done, she'll announce either a sequel or a film reboot
>>
>>51756590

Rowling loves going back and "revising" things to resume discussion on her work.

I think the funniest one though is when Ron's actor Rupert Grunt said he'd always assumed Hermione would eventually divorce Ron for being a roustabout.
>>
>>51756132
that reminds me...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBVwiWiMS5I
>>
>>51727763
Best critique i've ever read of HPMOR is this: https://danluu.com/su3su2u1/hpmor/
>>
>>51756746
The misuse of Thermodynamics is the one that gets me the most.
And the time turner ex machina
>>
>>51753388
Obviously, the Merlin wrote the stories about himself, himself, as some sort of historical fan fiction.
>>
>>51736931
That's some high quality bait you got there. Almost could be mistaken for an argument.
>>
>>51756887
That's all handwaveable away. Methods of Rationality is rotten in it's core with the author's masturbatory style of writing and the oh-so-witty twists and references.
>>
>>51756887
The time turner was a seriously fucking stupid plot device to inset into the books to begin with

Can Rowling even grasp what kind of bullshit is capable with it?
And seriously having them give it to some random schoolgirl so she can take multiple classes?
>>
>>51756943
frankly i have a completely different problem with the thing, why were there so few magical gadgets overall? Look at us today, everyone has a smartphone, probably a watch or even a smartwatch, handheld devices, laptops, tablets etc. Why dose the wizard world have so few of them? The only people who have the right idea are the wesley brothers with their prankshop, and just that is not really much. What's stoping me from making a avadacadabra spitball or a mirror that petrify anyone who looks into it? Where are the fireball charged rings and hair pins with dispelling spells just in case
>>
>>51756932
>Methods of Rationality is rotten in it's core with the author's masturbatory style of writing and the oh-so-witty twists and references
>>51756932
>>51756932
never read HPMOR but what the fuck do you expect out of a god damn fanfiction
>>
>>51757744
Nothing, and that's the problem.
People hold it up like some shining example of what fanfiction should aspire to be, but the reality is that it's just as mastabatory as my immortal
>>
>>51757512
Assumably there is no assembly line for wands or other magic objects.
>>
>>51726817
>>51719976

This is why I love coming to /tg/, you guys just get it.
>>
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>>51719865
call it trash or fetish fuel and I wont deny it, but as long as we are talking fanfiction, I always kind of like seeing the wizarding world if the impure bloods where made to be slaves, sold off to the wizarding world when detected through charmed parents. Theyre considered too dangerous to simply leave with untapped magic, but also the fact that they could become strong wizards themselves are kept from them, they aren't allowed to practice magic, and from a preteen age are basically managed by witches or wizards who's magic could otherwise dominate them at a thought.

Hermione would be brought into that world, unable to use her smarts for things like magic, which, despite instilled with submissiveness, her inquisitive nature supplements with all the modern fancies and knowledge we content ourselves with in the real world in a place where they are seen as little more than curious. I don't really know if I'd intend it to be more than slice of life and have hermione have some kind of end game, but the imagined plot basically is split between hermione being trained to obey and her visiting little imported muggle goods shops with her spare time and experiencing the changed narrative of hogwarts from the side of the help.
>>
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>>51757819
>>51757744
speaking as someone who heard of it back in the hay day, I couldn't get through to the part where harry gets to hogwarts. if you want to read actual good fanfiction, you want something that takes a crazy and cringy premise and makes it work with character development and charm. HPMOR does the exact opposite of this.

On a clear day you can see forever is a clear example of the opposite. Its setting and premise is cringe at best, an edgy industrial magical society involving sailor senshi and ranma as vigilantes who slowly uncover a plot to destroy life as they know it, but the story works and works well specifically because the characters are likable, develop and grow, and their conflicts drive the story rather than stilt it.
>>
>>51729125
Wizard X-Files, Luna is the Mulder analogue, Neville is Scully.
>>
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>>51756943
I like to believe that shit was given to hermione because it has very very bad exponential effects on the people who use them, and they gave her a specific set of instructions that they knew she would later break, increasing their ability to combat the dark lord and give the golden trio XPs while allowing them to resecure the cursed life force stealing time turner before the repercussions on her become noticeable.
>>51756710
hermione was always the character I related to most, so I pretty much headcanoned her to be bisexual since I am not a huge fan of men. I never really got the ron/hermione pairing. Dramione is cancer but I have to admit there's potential there because it involves one of them breaking and changing (if not both) and that's character development. Ron and hermione seems like a lazy pair the spare.
>>
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>>51756619
because we like and secretly all wish we where witches. how hard is this for you to understand?
>>
>>51737279
>reeeeee
your loss
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