Wanted to dump something that happened while hosting a D&D

>thread with no topic
>stating the obvious about Roll20 campaigns
>not even vetting the players before letting them join
>greentext more than a post long
this better be good.

>>51401244
part 2
>The bard being a pacifist shouldve been a red fucking flag considering our campaign takes place in a city under siege by an orc army, pretty basic stuff for beginners.
>Party wakes up in the demolished tavern, half-orc starts looking around for ale and other supplies
>Bard uses this really cringey female voice and repeadtly tells him to stop
>Half-orc doesn't give a shit, find some pots and some money lying around.
>the half-orc being useful and the bard telling him to stop it is going to be a recurring thing
>eventually a scared dwarf barges in the tavern and starts tellign the party to pipe down because orc patrols are coming
>before the dwarf can explain this, half-orc smacks him unconscious in a single blow.
>Entire party is rightfully mad at him
>decides to sue his potion of cure light wounds he found to heal the dwarf to he can wake up and keep talking
>eventually the cleric did a bluff on the dwarf to make him believe that they found him unconscious after he was attacked by orcs
>somehow worked because nat 20
>dwarf proceeds to tell them taht he can get his airship to work and get the fuck out of the city but he needs people to cover his ass while he preps the ship
>party follows him
>they immediatly encounter a patrol of orcs while exiting the tavern
>druid and fighter single-handedly defeat the orcs, roughly 5 of them
>cleric used literally no spells and kept missing every attack with his -1 attack bonus crossbow, because he refused to fight in melee where his attack bonus was actually positive despite having decent AC
>Bard plays songs to buff the party
>did i say party? i meant his own fucking self
>this fucking bard had a song active that would raise his AC to an obscene 22, and if you managed to hit that, you would have to do a will save of 21 or higher to manage to hit him because otherwise your attack gets cancelled
>hes level fucking 1
cont.

File: 362.jpg (5KB, 200x159px) Image search: [Google]

5KB, 200x159px

>>51401244
part 3
>After the fight is over, the half-orc has about 3 hitpoints left, considering he soaked up all the damage.
>druid asks the cleric if he can heal anyone
>nope
>cleric didn't take a single healing spell and refused to use the cleric special ability gimmick to turn other spells into healing spells because :they might come in handy"
>they did not
>half-orc spots a trapdoor while sifting through the orc;s bodies and decides to check it out
>old creepy cellar with a locked steel door at the end
>entirety of party is down to check it out
>besides the Bard ofc
>half-orc tells the bard to fuck off OOC, and the party decides to check out the cellar
>cellar is very obviously a bandit nest
>half-orc bangs on the door
>bandits ask for a password
>half-orc decides to ditch this place since no one can break open or lockpick this door
>Bard tries fucking diplomacy on the bandits
>doesn't work
>bandits get alerted because they realize someone found their hideouts
>bandits come out the door weapons drawn, both swing at bard but no luck hitting through that wall of obscure rules
>half-orc and druid take down the bandits, half-orc is near death yet again
>half-orc starts collecting teeth, bard gets mad about it again
>half-orc still couldn;t give less of a fuck
>half-orc decides to do a spot check
>try to explain to him how to do this
>cleric and bard start talking about rules in broken english, rules which have little to nothing to do with what;s going on and are ridciulously complicated.
>they did this shit EVERY SINGLE TIME i had to explain something to the new players
>and i had to explain every single dice roll they had to do
>anyway, after a painful 15 minutes of them invoking obscure rules about spot checks for some reason and the new players getting more confused by the seconds, he eventually sucessfully finds the bandit's stash
>gp for days
>bard gets mad about half-orc taking gold from others
>mfw
cont, this is getting long, ill try to shorten it a little

>>51401608
Question: Did the bard got OOC really mad about the Half-Orc behavior or it was IC comments?

part 4
>>51401244
>campaign continues
>from what you;ve read nothing much ever changes, they meet orcs, half-orc and druid do all the fighting while cleric misses his crossbow shots and bards stands there playing music to buff herself
>half-orc collecting teeth and Bard getting mad about it every time
>hell literally EVEYTHING that half-orc did got the bard mad.
>Eventually they come across a house with orcish screams coming out of it
>they investigate
>they end up fighting some orcs, one of them NEARLY managed to hit bard but will check fucked him over
>they search the house and for once, bard decides to help
>he/she finds a hidden compartment in a wardrobe containing a longsword +1
>she decides to keep it for herself and refuses openly to give it anyone else or to sell it because it's an upgrade to ehr longsword
>which she refuses openly to use because that would cause her to lose her insane AC bonuses and be actually useful
>she also realized that she had a song that gives player extra fire damage on attacks the entire time but never used it
>fantastic, party is relieved that she can actually be useful
>later in the house they find a chest
>dead electrocuted bodies scattered around it
>you have to be retarded to not think this is a trap
>cleric casts a spell and actually does something
>detect magic reveals that the chest is magically trapped and will zap the fuck out of you if you try to open it
>half-orc decides to carry the chest with him and evetually pay someone to remove the trap and open the contents
>bard and cleric go HYSTERICAL about rules
>not mad or anything, but they just start explaining random and pointless rules for a good 20 minutes
>me and my friends start going silent and having really bad headaches because of their shit
>they later find some ale kegs and half-orc invites the party to drink
>bard wildly opposes
>gets told to fuck off once more
>party starts drinking and ignoring whatever the bard is saying in character
finale coming

>>51401715
mostly IC, but he also got slightly upset in OOC

>>51401244
the finale
>the party reaches the airship docks
>the dwarf NPC tells them that they need to fend off the orc invaders while he preps the ship
>druid casts entangle, causing nearly everyone in the fight area to get entangled.
>bard resists every time because some other obscure rule
>druid and half-orc doing their best to fend off the orcs, and eventually a nerfed troll
>bard still not doing jack, not even using his damage buff
>orcs got oneshot pretty easily anyway so it wasn;t really necessary
>after fending off a couple orcs, half-orc starts his teeth collecting routine during downtime
>bard gets mad
>half-orc is done with her shit
>decides to slap her
>this slap was the one slap to pierce the heavens
>attack roll
>nat 20
>it's a hit
>still needs to do a will check with a DC of 21
>nat
>fucking
>20
>bard gets smacked unconscious for all her hitpoints
>did i mention the airship docks were on a cliff?
>and that she was right next to it?
>falls down
>a nigga dead
>bard player isn't even mad about it
>cleric says he has to leave because job called him
>eventually we agree to stop the session and assume the party fought off the orcs
>bard and cleric still think we are playing again with them
>bard is still messaging me wondering if his bard is still alive
>they are still trying to contact me on Roll20 to this day
so yeah, don't play with randoms on Roll20.
keep D&D the way it was meant to be played : pen and paper, and no pacifists half-dragon edgelords

tl;dr a completely typical 3.5 game.

>>51401913
my sweet summer friend, do you ever lay awake at night and contemplate the idea that this is a completely generic story that somehow took 5 posts to explain and killed a thread which had exponentially more possibilites than this?

File: screencapture-boards-4chan-org-tg-thread-51401244-1485396872549.png (374KB, 1271x2536px) Image search: [Google]

374KB, 1271x2536px

Decent story anon, a good 6/10.
Took the liberty of screencapping it if anybody at all wants it.

>>51402124
thanks senpai