Post flavor text that makes you smile, whether due to funny,

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>Even those born to battle could only lay their blades at Akroma's feet.

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>I smell fudge, those Keebler bastards must be close.

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>>51163998

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>>51163998

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>>51167068

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This will never stop being my favorite.

>>51170203
2 spoopy

>>51164802
best in the thread right here

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>>51163998

>>51172537
nigga what are you doing

>>51164762

I need some rules errata text on that flavor text.

"it has two kinds of droppings, neither of which are pleasant"

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>>51163998

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>>51175426

As a player who got his high school start in mono-red goblin tribal, reading this almost makes me feel patriotic.

Of course, they then went and fucking ruined it in the reprint.

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>>51175889
Don't know why that didn't upload.

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based AF

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>>51177255
Hey buddy, use magiccards.info or that ultra-high res torrent from slightlymagic for images. Gatherer has ass resolution

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>>51177350
k

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Obligatory

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One day, Mirrodin will shine mirror-bright once more.

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>>51178153

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All of the versions of Pacifism have good flavor text but this one is my favorite

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>>51165621

Poor Barrin. Urza was a fuck.

Poor Hanna

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Lots of good flavor text from Tarkir.

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fuckin classic

>>51164474

That's not the real flavor text, is it?

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Time to end this thread.

>>51164474
>not "Around elves, watch yourselves."

>>51178992
where is the Weatherlight & Predator...

any fanmade vehicle kerds?

>>51165612
How does this make you smile???

>>51175922
>SMASH SMASH SONG

What sucks is they probably changed that because focus groups showed people like that for goblins more.

>>51178904
>"Living side by side with the elves for so long leaves me with no doubt that we serve the same goddess." —Kolbjörn, elder druid of the Juniper Order

>>51178992
>No Trample
What
is the
fucking
point

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>>51179037
>where is the Weatherlight & Predator...

>>51179153
6/6 for 4 at common, with a drawback that may not matter if you have weenie creatures that can't attack profitably anyway where the tank can?

>>51179153
It's an efficient (by Limited standards) body in situations where you can't swing with everything.

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I vote original Mons's Goblin Raiders for the "flavor text that most improves a card" award. The card itself is the most boring thing possible, but the flavor makes it absolutely fucking fascinating. I want to know more about these deep ass gobbos and their intricate dynamics. And it's bullshit that there wasn't Pashalik Mons as a legend in Time Spiral.

It helps that this is just about the only text on a Goblin card that's not har-de-har jokey, but dead serious and informative.

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So in terms of the color pie red has the best flavor text right?

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>>51179095
>What sucks is they probably changed that because focus groups showed people like that for goblins more.

I don't know who Wizards use for their focus testing, but whoever they are, they should be gassed. I knew it from the moment I read in a MaRo article that their testers chose Shield of Duty and Reason as the single worst flavor text in all of Invasion block, or some dumb shit like that. Fucking Shield of Duty and Reason. This is MARVELOUS. One of the best ever. It's a pun, but it's not a funny pun, it's kind of solemn and somber. I love it.

>>51179195
dat alt art planeshift ver..

shit gotta buy one now...


I mean fan made vehicle cards like the new shit from Kaladesh

>>51179247
Ah, before goblins got all memed up.

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>>51179282

Idunno, blue has some good ones too when you look for them. They're just buried under all the hundreds that follow the
>"Sarcastic quip"
>-Blue Wizard
formula.

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>>51179309
so we will never get a Sword of Duty & Reason ?

they dropped the ball fug WoTC

>>51179430
MerfolkProdigal Sorcerer ?

wow still remember buying rath cycle packs....

dem feels...

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>Did you go through all the trouble to unscramble this?

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Hanweir Garrison is pretty funny too in context, I think

>>51179282
this text is great because you really have to be insane to make a deck around that card

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>>51163998
Always makes me chuckle.

>>51163998
That's one god awful shitty card.

>>51179153
It matches the flavor. It tricks your opponent into chumping because it wont just trample over them.
Basically their creatures run away until they cant run and are squished, represented by them chumping. Its pretty sneaky.

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>>51173077
>>51176107
I've always loved flavor text that's so good, it could actually be a saying.

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>>51178613
KTK was an amazing set in almost every sense.

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>>51178282
"̪P̱̬̫̲̰erf͍̰̻̫̰͙͔ẹc̥̫̯͙͕t͉i̮̙̬o̜n ̟̟͈i͕͍̱s̭̗͙ ̖on̰̜͔͙̘̠̪l̖̰y̘͔̺̳̳ ̹̞̖͍̼̻a̜͍̠̩̙̼͔c͚h͖͙̺̞̟̗i̦̗̤e̜v̰̬̜̮̩e̫̯̘̗̪̳̫d̺̺̰̝̦ ̫͓t͓̩͎̠̜ḥ̮̟̣͕̹̘r͇̟̩̪̯̠̖o̤̲̤̯̗̟͍u̠͈̬̻̖g̟͇ḥ̤̼̻ ̮͉̤t̙̪͕̫̠͇̤h̳e͉̮͔͎̗̮̦ ̳̮̱̝l̮̬̩͓e͕̤͎s̳̹s̮̲̜̗͉o͔͇̰̟̜̖n̘s̖ ͖̭̘͖̭of̭ͅ ͍̻̩̭̙͔me͇t̗͖͇a̖̮l̦͎̟͎̘̠.̫ ͔͉̠̯̜ͅT̟̩̣̪̭he m̲e̤̜̘͖̪r̲̘̞̝e̳̣̰̹l͙̟y̹̝̦ͅ ̙̥b͕̫̦̞̞̬̪orͅn̮̹ ̱̜c̝̟̻̝ͅa̻n̟̺̭n̻o̲̩t̩̺͍̯͖̙ ͖̰̮r͚͎̳͇͓̦ͅe̩a̠͕͇̻̮͇ch͇̖̬̰̤ͅ ̬̣̭̖͇ͅt̮͉̳͍ḥ͚͓i͕͚͎̺͈̲s͕̬̮ ͓̠̜̳ͅs̤t͈̘̗̻͈̣ͅa̼̦̠͈t͕̹͖̳̝̭̟e̗̺̞̻ͅ,̫̮͇̹̘ͅ ̫̖a̙̖͚̱̟͚n͓̞ḏ̤̣̭ i͙̲͉̘̺n̝ ̘̝t̳̤̦͍h̝͇͉͚̱e̬͚̪̯̼͍͕i̟̠̳͍̭̯̭r̜̘̦̫̬̻̻ ̫̬̲̹̤͈ͅṃ͙̙̳i̫͓̖̖̤̘̖s̱̦e̘ry͖ ̠͓̤̥̠͇t̤̼̥h̬̠ey̝ ̰͖̹̙̹̺̪c̦̫̜̭r̟͍̗͉y͈̮̘̻̮ ̝ͅf̜͔͍̞̮o̼̬ͅr̖͎̘͓̳ ͉̼̠o̻͖͚̻̹̹̥u̱̙̣̪͕ͅr̬̯̮͕ ̥̠̼̫i̭̳̘̜̮m͔̖̥pr̺͇o͓v̬̟̗͔ͅem͓̺e̫n͍̝t̳͎̤͈̼͍s͎͉̠̥̦̰ͅ."͈̺̪͖͇̟̹

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>>51178153

>>51164762
ALL ABOARD! AHHHHH-HAHAHAHA!

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>>51168052
Keyword; "may".

>>51167068
The lack of flavor text on Murder is a flavor all its own.

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get it?

>>51180323
I played this the last time it was in Standard.

>>51172537
>(She doesn't lose loyalty while he's not a planeswalker.)
What the fuck are you doing dude.

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Even though the creature is nonthreatening, what it represents is horrific.

>>51172537
>Double strike, lifelink
>If you would gain life, instead put a loyalty counter on ~. Then, if there are seven or more loyalty counters on @, transform her.
That's the correct wording. Props for using loyalty counters on flipwalkers correctly! One other thing: it's kind of a flavor miss that she can transform herself without outside help.

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Where are all the cute flavor texts?

>>51184829
This is the first magic card that really got me interested in reading up flavor text.

>>51184076
Fuck, that's good.

>>51184076
Fuck, that took me a bit. That is pretty clever.

>>51185575
That's actually really sweet.

>>51185575
Cute. Now that I think about it, wouldn't this be extremely common in the Pokémon universe? Parents that don't want to send out their ten year olds just get a single Pokémon for them to act as guardians.

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I've always had an irrational hatred of this card. Like, I know it's balanced but the randomized mechanic just tickles me the wrong way.

>>51185870
I love it. That card's flavor is one of the greatest to ever come out of RnD.
He's such an awful pilot, he's just as likely to kill himself as anyone else.

>>51179309
>Crapping on Shield of Duty and Reason
Fucking MaRo. He and his cronies need be gassed like the rodents they are.

>>51172362
Wtf I recognize this

>>51185870
The group I play with does a lot of multiplayer games and we have a guy who loves token generation, so I'm mostly just annoyed by the hassle of needing to randomly choose one of, say, 13 different targets.

>>51185929
>quirkshit
>flavor

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>>51167068

>>51172537
/ccg/ is over here.
>>51147428

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>>51173167

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>>51186356
I always love when Black decides to lighten up a bit.

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>>51186512

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>>51163998

Mistforms.

>Familiarity, the first myth of reality: What you know the best, you observe the least.

>Devotion, the second myth of reality: The faithful are most hurt by the objects of their faith.

>Conviction, the third myth of reality: Only those who seek the truth can be deceived.

>Fellowship, the fourth myth of reality: As the tides of war shift, so do loyalties.

>Trust, the fifth myth of reality: Every truth holds the seed of betrayal.

The Mistform Sliver covers all these.

>>51185566
Am I dumb? I still don't get it

>>51186640
It's a haiku

>>51186652
Oh shoot I didn't notice. Nice that's brilliant

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"The enemy has been destroyed, sir. So have the forest, the city, your palace, your dog . . ."
—Keldon soldier

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>>51186844
hide yo wife, hide yo kids hide yo forest, hide your dog

>>51185575
What a faithful Tepig.

>>51186844
Compared to the original text, this isn't even funny.

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>>51186929
Stop.

>>51186844
How could someone prefer this to the original?

>>51186929
Don't even go there.

>>51179309
I don't get it, what's the pun? Just seems like bland flavor text describing the shield. Is it because they use the word reason two different ways at the same time?

>>51183737
:(

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>>51187361
Man, Volrath had some great villain lines.

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>>51186535

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>>51187502
Man, villainous minions always get a raw deal.

>>51186844
>So have the forest

Ew.

>>51186844

>not posting the original version

>>51187783
see >>51165621

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>>51188149

>>51188997
So much better than the flavour of the current version of that card

>>51187317
I always liked it because it implies that the shield of duty and reason is just a regular shield, but apparently the person using it was such a baller that it reached legendary status.

http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=247529
http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=193463
http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=235193
http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=423674

Some of these I like because how the flavor text complements at least some other aspects of the card.

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This whole thing is ridiculous.

>>51165621
That's not funny.

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I keep this card in my binder just to look at it.

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>>51184410
Not to defend a shitty design, but that is technically correct.

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>>51163998

>>51187169
>>51187298
...I'm missing something, aren't I?

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>>51193378
"Faithful tepig" is a cute pokemon comic with an infamously tear-inducing ending. Just google it.

>>51183929
Fuck. Off.

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>>51175922
>>51175889
Yeee nigga

Goblins Being Extremely Badass is one of my favorite things in Magic, too bad it barely exists anymore. Also THIS ART

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STAND ASIDE, SERFS

KING OF FLAVOR TEXT COMING THROUGH

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I also like raging goblin

>>51186786
Don't know what game that is, but that's hilarious.

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>>51194264

>>51195109
I'm guessing it's Netrunner

>>51186605
>Mutant specifies that you can't choose Legend or Wall
>Mask doesn't restrict your choice
Wow, Mistform Mask was probably a wwaaaaaaaay better card before those changes to type rules.

>>51187317
>I don't get it, what's the pun?
I don't see a pun either, but there's definitely some wordplay.
It's ambiguous to whether they're defending to survive or surviving to defend.
>Just seems like bland flavor text describing the shield.
It's definitely describing the shield-bearer.

>>51195109
>>51195252
Yes, Netrunner.

>>51164762
Is there any reason it has to look like a triceratops?

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>>51195675
Because RIP.

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Can't believe I just remembered this one.

>>51195675
Huh, never noticed that before.

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Oh, Time Spiral... You were too pure for this world.

>>51195816
So much gloriously strange shit in that block.

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>>51195855
Indeed.

>>51193085
>to look at
You know there is a black border version of that card, right?

>>51196128
Several black border versions.

>>51197125
why not just leave it open?

>>51195816

I quit the game during Mirrodin because I hated what the game had become. Time Spiral would've been the exact sort of thing that could have brought me back, had I known it existed.

>>51187277
>>51187361
>>51187439

Please don't post Weatherlight saga trash here, this thread is for good flavor, not "literally quit the game over this shit" flavor.

>>51197673

Volrath quotes are great you baby.

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>>51197673
Hmm, what was that? You're a faggot and you need to pull a stick out of your ass? Well, if you say so.

Either Goblin Gardener or Gryphon.

>>51197729
Yo, buddy… >>51197715 is right, but otherwise c >>51197673

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Time Spiral was the best.

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>>51198407
>Within each empty skull, it seeks ways to preserve its own failing undeath.

>>51184076
Fuck you.

>>51172537
"SHE doesn't lose loyalty while HE's not a planeswalker"
Tell me, my man. How beautiful is her feminine penis?

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>>51198407

>>51163998
The different between a nuisance and a threat is often a matter of numbers

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>>51193166
SHE doesn't while HE

SHE/HE

FEMALEMALE

MEALEFLAF
AFA
ALFKASFA
a

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My favorite...words to live by

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>>51187375
he gets a new owner though

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> In the future, she may be a distinguished leader, a great scholar, or a decorated hero. These days all she does is pee the bed.

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>>51199730
cute but ill never have children....

planeswalking does not involve raising kids

is there any planeswalker that has a family ?

well karn is made a whole plane but lets disregard that . ...

>>51200942
Taymio has a very happy family life.

>>51168321
>>51167068
This gives me boners untold.

>>51186929
M
U
H

>>51179767
>The art of the actual creature IS the flavor text
That's too fast for me.

>>51172362

I was about to say, if you want funny / heartwarming / interesting flavortext, you gotta check out Magi-Nation. Followed swiftly by The Spoils.

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edgy

>>51196024
oh, that is cool. Never noticed that cycle.

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>>51199599
Such a happy family

>>51199730
Best part if the flavor is that 30 little kids, so a class of kindergarteners, can take down Emrakul

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>>51205301

>>51195743
but....how?

>>51206063
>fake, but they did cast 6 siege rhinos that game.jpg

>>51179282
Absolutely. See Sizzle: >>51167068

>>51199599
Is there any tcg with more charming card art than yugioh?

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I love this one, always makes me smile and think about insane sorcerers.
Lawmages>Sparkmages>>>>the rest

>>51187212
This is what Innistard should become. A world ruled by Vampire/Ghost Patricians.

>>51198856
This. Also dat Richard Kane Ferguson art. Loved his style.

>>51193085

>But I don't see any rabbits.

>>51184532

Hey so if that card walks on a plane, does it ascend and become a Phyrexian Planeswalker?

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>>51197602

Even the protagonist of Mirrodin hated Mirrodin.

>>51197354

He pointlessly hopes that the door might hold him for a few minutes more than just let himself run amok?

>>51200942

Chandra still has a mother.

>>51212774
Has to walk on two planes first, planes plural and all that.

>>51172362
>IT'S BAD FOR THEM! ...THAT'S GOOD FOR YOU!

>>51179038
Maybe he just really hates poor people

>>51197729
>Do not mourn for me. I was a terrible character.

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>>51215008
Hey, I'm only defending the idea that cards from that era can have good flavortext too, I'm not defending the characters. Or those characters' cards. Look at this garbage. The hero of the Weatherlight Saga everyone...

>>51215085
Was he played by Chris Pratt?

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>>51164852
>Kamigawa had some great lore
>powergamers panned it because NOT MUH MIRRODIN
>casuals panned because WTF THIS ISN'T LIKE MY ANIMES
>MaRo said Theros, a shitty hollywood-style fantasy Greece, was "Kamigawa done right"

As a Vorthos it hurts.

>>51178832
*tips helm*

>>51215628
It's been done >>51204069

Speaking of which >>51165290, >>51175444

>>51215628
Kamigawa is fucking rad as hell, flavor-wise. Even got some decent cards out of it

>>51215628
As a casual Vorthos, I didn't like Kamigawa. Some of the concepts were cool, but it's a bit difficult to keep names and concepts straight when the names/structures are so radically different.

Admittedly, I have this same problem with Dynasty Warriors, Pretty much anyone that isn't Sun Tzu or Wukong, Mulan, wuxia/kung fu films, or the animes. Names/places don't stick.
Not saying everyone needs to be called 'George', I just can't get into it.

For what it's worth, I hated Mirrodin as well- though 'white cards look like artifacts' and 'muh card changes, it all sounds likes microchips' contributed. I wanted to like Theros, but I couldn't get into that either.

Kaladesh and Zendikar have been cool, though.

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>>51215628
>shitty hollywood-style fantasy Greece
Personally, I never understand this complaint.

As for Kamigawa, are you joking? The Spirit versus non-Spirit tribal split made so many of the cards incredibly parasitic it's insane. Not that they needed to be parasitic, because they'd probably just wind up underpowered and overcosted, like so many other cards in Kamigawa. Many of the mechanics were either boring or just plain bad. I'm sorry, but as far as the actual cards go, Commander is probably the only reason why people are familiar with a lot of the cards from Kamigawa.

As for the comparison to Theros, yes, I think they did a much better job at least on the spirit/god world vs. human/mortal world thing than Kamigawa did. Tacking on the enchantment type rather than making an entire side just Spirits was a good way of making one side very distinct without having to make cards incredibly parasitic to interact with them.

>>51184076
A Haiku
Arcane spell

Fucking took me a moment but thunderous applause.

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>>51215778
>Names/places don't stick.
Semi-off-topic, but you ever read Maoyuu?
I loved how everyone had descriptions instead of names.

>>51215778
>it all sounds likes microchips
I haven't heard of this complaint. Though I will say that the first time I saw scans of Mirrodin artifacts, I did think for a moment they were White cards. Not that I'd complain about it, just a minor "That's weird" moment.

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I miss Lorwynn/Shadowmoor

>>51194264
Fallen Empires is criminally underrated

>>51197602
Mirrodin had a good aesthetic but bad lore and balance.

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>>51215823
Seen pictures of it before, 'oh you have a boner my how awkward you must feel!' isn't really my fetish tho. I might check it out, that naming convention sounds like something I could wrap my head around.

The weird bit is it's really only east asian shit. I'm a bit of a Hinduboo, and I've written papers on Maori folktales and stories, and I have no problems keeping all those names/stories straight.

The parts of Kamigawa that were in 'Localized Language' weren't bad. I liked the ninjas aesthetic/mechanics, but I didn't play with any named ones for that reason. Skullsnatcher, Throat-Slitter, Marrow-Gnawer, et al. were ok.

>>51216020 Strictly worse than Doom Blade.

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I dunno, I always liked how the art is so, I guess, mysterious. No hinting, no action, just there. Especially combined with the flavortext.

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>>51216039
I know but I love the art and flavor text.

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>>51215826
I just really liked the old design, even if it was a little clunky. The new Mirrodin+ cardset looks too modern and clean to me, it doesn't say 'magic'. I've got over my autism about it eventually, but I still like the old look.

I understand why they made the choices they did, and I'm glad they did because it brought life back in the game (and new blood). And made things easier to see / read at a distance, which is more important for competitive play (I guess), but the monochrome mana symbols, new card look, and the cheesed-to-hell meta forced me out for that expansion. When the next was Kamigawa, I stayed gone.

Coldsnap was pretty fucking cool though. Top one of my favorites.

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Sharing a few of mine.

>>51216068
Bet you $15 the artist misread that as "Ancient Carving"

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>>51216107
>monochrome mana symbols
Yeah, that was another thing I never got. And yeah, Coldsnap was cool, though I'd have to say my favorite is probably Planar Chaos. Really, the whole Time Spiral block, but I do really love the colorshifted cards.

Anyway, who wants a shotgun?

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I really wish we could see the more "normal" members of the guilds. The Dimir librarian who occasionally gets notes to hide in certain books, the Rakdos entertainer, a Gruul member who actually tries to make a park or something instead of just breaking everything.

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My first ever MTG cards were from Mirrodin. I think I learned about MTG from InQuest Gamer. I drew Great Furnace from one of the pack and I've always had fond memories of it.

>>51193227
Have always loved that text. Sorry, I've nothing to add.

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>>51198856

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White-aligned phyrexians. The flavor text practically writes itself and yet it's still so delicious.

The best part?
They're coming back this year

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>>51216426

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>>51216732
I like the little guy on the right huddling close to the big guy. Makes the Phyrexians seems like they're not complete dicks.

>>51216736
...Thanks, I guess?

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>"INFLATE THE TOAD!"

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Atraxa marks the final victory in the Phyrexian conquest of Mirrodin. Once a Mirran angel who opposed Phyrexia's corruption, she was captured while single-handedly protecting a Mirran retreat. The praetor Elesh Norn honored the angel's tenacity with the blessed gift of Phyrexian compleation, inviting other praetors to contribute. Urabrask declined, but Jin-Gitaxias, Sheoldred, and Vorinclex all agreed to join Elesh Norn's efforts, and Atraxa was born—an awe-inspiring testament to Phyrexia's singular purpose.

>>51216828
Did Wizards ever update us on what happened to Urabrask and Sheoldred?

>>51165189
kek, underrated

>>51216883
I remember reading something on the wizards site in the past year or two that mentioned in passing that Norn became the dominant Praetor but was still having trouble with Urabrask.

Unfortunately I've never been able to locate the source of this and I'm starting to wonder if I just imagined it.

>>51216946There was a brief time after Karn left that I thought the resistance had a chance. The praetors were squabbling among themselves for supremacy. But they all began to despise the interloper, Tezzeret. Although the resistance had limited access to information, we believed Elesh Norn had dominated Urabrask's and Sheoldreds' domains. So we focused our energies on destroying her. But for every life we saved, they slaughtered eight, ten, a hundred more. And soon there were precious few left to save. In the words of Elesh Norn, "We are a single entity. Dissenters must be sutured into the orthodoxy."

From the story "The Lost Confession" on the wizards site

>>51216426
there were stories for both a dimir info broker, rag-tag gruul (Who by definition don't HAVE a guild purpose anymore, it take taken by Selesnya and Simic), and an entire story about Rakdos entertainers.

>>51215794
I think Anon's main beef was with the lore being wasted on an unpopular set while another, Hollywood-ified set was lauded as a success by MaRo.

Can't really throw in my opinion on Theros, I stopped playing before Alara hit.

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savage bump

>>51167068
Its great when a cards name is so descriptive that you hardly need to reed the rules text to understand what it does.

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>>51215970
Ironically Marrow-Gnawer is actually a named dude.

Honestly Kamigawa was fine from a card perspective but it fucking shined with its characters and how they interacted with the plot. I still remember my childhood wonder at reading the description of Hidetsugu murderizing the hell our of a dragon at Minamo.

>>51215628
>shitty hollywood-style fantasy Greece

Classics/Art History major here. Theros was fantastic from both a thematic and art perspective. Absolutely nailed the spirit/mythology of ancient Greece in terms of flavor. Devotion is a ridiculously cool mechanic and fits in perfectly with the concept of worship when contextualized in a card game

My only gripe is that they shied away from depicting nudity which is a HUGE aspect of Greek art but I know that's just a result of having to make it "family-friendly"

>>51178613
or the unofficial flavor text

"but if I have two shields which do i block with?"

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>>51221100
>neither.

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No one spoke. There was no need. The threat of the Eldrazi presented a simple choice: lay down your weapons and die for nothing, or hold them fast and die for something.

>>51216732

>Spoiler

Source? or is it just a hunch because he's in the new set?

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shocked this hasnt been posted yet

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There really aren't any good Vanguard card flavors.

>>51222254
Is the text in reference to lightning bolt being reprinted despite being considered too strong?

>>51223542
yes, it was the first time it was reprinted in a long long time.

>>51223542
Yup. That flavor text is from the Magic 2010 set.
Promos aside, Lightning Bolt hadn't seen print since 2000.

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I adore this grenzo. He manages to pull off the right mix of mad anarchist and disgruntled middle management guy who just got laid off and is going to go take a dump on his bosses desk in revenge.

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>>51179430
Aw, I like that formula.

>>51224848
Nice hat

>>51222254
>shocked

>>51196128
White bordered modern frame looks cool though. I wish there were more sets that did it.

>>51184829
YES someone posted my favorite one, i didnt have to go find it!

>>51179430
>caesura

i came

>>51216083
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXlEFGzvLUw

>>51186512
I read that in The Monarch's voice form Venture Bros

Guys, this might be my only chance to ask this.
I remember reading a simple card a long time ago. It was some sort of farmer, and the flavor text said something like "why grow vegetables on earth when we could just eat dirt", but on a coarser tone.
Does anyone know the name of the card?

>>51232400
Goblin Gardener

>>51195458
Beast could be used to shut down multiple enemy attackers or kill things with the same name. Mask just does it to whatever it's enchanting, and can't get to the two-legend count (and doing so kills the mask)
That's why the restriction back then - 1 to shut down one creature is fine, 1U each to shut down multiples was deemed not (plus lolkill).

>>51232453
No, I understand why Mistform Mutant has the restriction.
My point is that Mistform Mask when from being clunky Blue pacifism/removal to being clunky Blue garbage.

>>51216732
I don't think they'll come back this year, but they are definitely setting up for it. With the Eldrazi arc just finished, they need time to calm shit down before launching another apocalypse scenario.

>>51205301
If they can fly. And have at least 6 other permanents to sacrifice, not including whatever is granting them flying.
Then they can take out Emrakul's titan.

>>51224448
So who rapes?

>>51232452
Thanks friendo.

>>51215628
I take solace in the fact I'm not the only one who adored the lore, even if there's not many of us.

>>51215794
Don't blame Spirit tribal for Soulshift, the Spirits didn't ask for it, also Arcane was actually the worst offender for parasitism.

Moreover anon was praising the Kamigawa lore, not the cards or mechanics, which shouldn't be defended outside Umezawa's Jitte.

Sensei's Diving Top is retarded in all senses of the word.

>>51221392
And then BFZ happened

>>51183737
If it takes a thousand summers...
I will wait for youuu!

>>51186332
I'm not saying it's a bad flavor text, I'm just saying that the lack of any flavor text really works for that card.

http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Evilswarm_Heliotrope
"'Eliminate! Eradicate! Exterminate!' These are the thoughts of lingering Steelswarm souls, yearning for a body so that they might make their dream a reality."

>>51167068
Jaya has just so much good flavor text

>>51163998
"When killing five just isn't enough"

>>51177400
Unlimited Power counterspell best counterspell

>>51178953
>>51179904
>>51181315
>>51187530
>>51216142
>>51216500
>>51216792
Underrated posts right here

>>51205791
Well I would imagine that she would just fly over them....
Now Akroma's Memorial squirrels, especially 15 of them are a nightmare that no person should have to behold.

>>51173167
Way too wordy. Just needs the first two lines. Nice and punchy.

>>51227150
Hardly the best Mortify.

>>51216736
>In a perfectly peaceful Ravnica, all the good guilds could stop existing and have their duties taken over by the shit ones.

>>51242670
Dimir is goof and Orzhov is shit, but otherwise you've got that backwards. Also,
>angel prostitutes

>>51243239
Hold on, of a list consisting of

>Gruul
>Selesnya
>Dimir
>Simic
>Boros
You think that Dimir is top of that pile?

And of
>Golgari
>Izzet
>Orzhov
>Rakdos
>Azorius
You think that Orzhov is the worst of them?

I think this guy said it best: >>51186326

>>51243437
counting the shit we have Gruul and Selesnya on one side and Izzet Orzhov and Rakdos on the other. Seems like simple math to me

>>51242670
>>51243577
>Gruul a good guild vs Golgari
Let the Golgari have the wilds so they can farm without using artificial sunlight, fungus, and ground up people.

>Selesnya good vs Orzhov
Selesnya is a cult of communism where even your body is property of the people. Let the Orzhov handle religion and cultural events in Selesnya's place and keep the wheels of commerce that the city runs on turning.

>Simic vs Izzet
Either are equal honestly, but the Izzet already run the rest of the STEM jobs, so just give them biology too and be done with it. It's less work

>Dimir good vs Rakdos
Dimir is a fuck horrible edge guild of darkness and nothing personell. Rakdos stays because it actually does run the entertainment industry of the whole plane. The reason we see the murder clowns on cards is because THEIR job is entertaining the super devil, who if he gets bored can and will end the world.

>Boros better than Azorius.
The Boros are basically militarized police to deal with the aforementioned assholes that are getting removed. Without the Gruul fucking shit up or the Dimir fucking things up from behind the Azorious can take care of the law enforcement the plane needs.

Not >>51244119, but expanding on this slightly:
>Selesnya is a cult of communism where even your body is property of the people.
You need the Selesnya Conclave around to keep Mat'Selesnya appeased, but Mat'Selesnya is only a threat because of how many offerings they receive.
This is a nice contrast to Rakdos. You need the Cult of Rakdos to keep Lord Rakdos in check, because no matter what you do Lord Rakdos is a threat.

>>51244119
Azorius would eventually just attempt to pass way too many laws and over manage shit.

Boros would be better, they actually care about justice

>>51244913
Boros wouldn't be better since their end result is basically a mix of "Deploy the SWAT" and "Deploy the marines"
The marines are fine with what they do, but do you really want your entire government run by marines? Not just the police, the whole thing.

>>51244913
Boros is cops + a standing army
Azorious is lawyers + cops

Lawyers aren't necessarily nice, but they're useful
Standing armies aren't useful with nothing to fight

>>51244973
>>51245062
I agree but I'm just saying of the two only the Azorius has been the actual final boss villain for a Ravnica block

>>51245507
>only the Azorius has been the actual final boss villain for a Ravnica block
That's because only (and every) Blue guilds have been the villain.

On a *very* related side note, Ravnica is a predominantly Blue plane.
>http://magiccards.info/m15/en/78.html

>>51245701
I also want to point out that iirc, technically Theros should have been the Green soul but Zendikar was just that much greener. According to Maro

>>51245701
Izzet hasn't done anything wrong though.

Orzhov is best guild though, trying to fix the plane every time things go wrong.

>>51245791
Well that's dumb. They couldn't pick and older plane to be white?

>>51245807
It was easy to miss, what with how little story there was and all, but Izzet were the villains of Return to Ravnica.
Among other things, that's why even though the Implicit Maze was built by Azor I, the set was DRAGON'S maze.

>>51245904
Except Jace worked directly with them. The Izzet were doing their job of investigating weird energy fluctuations across the plane. Normally the guildpact would have granted them passage through other guild's territory but since the guildpact was a non-magical contract it couldn't so this brought them into conflict with, for example, the Golgari.

They were spending the entirety of RtR trying to save the plane.
Until they found out what hte Implicit Maze is and told the other guilds for Niv-Mizzet's "Grand experiment" then everyone was out for themselves until Jace Jace'd control of the guildpact.

>>51246006
The Izzet were going out of there way to prevent other people from investigating the maze.
Mostly by screwing over the city's infrastructure. The plot of that block was basically:
>Niv-Mizzet tries to beat his partners in a team-building exercise

>>51246069
WAS anyone else investigating the maze? The dimir even seemed more like thy were investigating the Izzet, not the maze.
And this is why they changed to this story a week on the internet method.

>>51246952
>WAS anyone else investigating the maze?
Image limit, so I can't post relevant flavortext. But yes.

New thread?