Have you ever run afoul of the dice police? >by which we

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>>51039810
Yool nevah catch me, coppers!

>>51039810

No because i roll openly so people can see and announce the roll as well. We have one guy who rolls by himself with dices that can barely be seen and we KNOW he fudges them constantly which makes it less enjoyable for the rest.

>>51039954
10/10, I fucking laughed my ass off. Well done anon, you should write modernist /tg/ poetry.

In the old days, a tepid roll was rewarded with a keen beating

These beatings were administered by the DM who wielded his thick RPG manuals like cudgels. "All of this is by the book" he would shout as he administered his special brand of justice.

>>51039954
>"All of this is by the book" he would shout as he administered his special brand of justice.

Stern but fair.

>Gamescience Precision Dice

"Sir. The edges on these dice are too sharp."

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>>51040048

Yes, ironically, he was the worst cheater in the group. The cunt would always screen his rolls, scooping up dice as soon as he'd call them, basically do everything to makesure nobody else set eyes on them. So what I did was I spent a few days practicing rigged rolls, y'know, rolling just so off the palm of your hand so that they almost always land on the right number, and started doing this on the table. Blatantly making half assed rolls, out in the open, and nobody questioned me or asked me to reroll (because everybody knew what I was doing) and then something just snapped in him and after a fair bit of hissyfitting on his part and stereotypical strawman comic coolness on mine he was forced to retire his cheating ways and everybody rolls the same way now, into the tower, in the middle of the table and dice only move after GM calls it.
FIN

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>>51040058

>being told that you have to keep a check on the guy next to you so he doesn't fudge those dices

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>>51040048
Think that's bad? Our GM throws these at us.

The roll only counts if they pierce our flesh and stay stuck. If they fall out within 5 seconds it's a re-roll. Or re-throw in this case.

>>51039810
No, because I'm not the sort of cunt who feels the need to cheat at games of pretend.