Magic Story - Burn http://magic.wizards.com/en/article s/ar

What pisses me off the most here is that everyone talks like a 2016 earlytwentysomething in these stories.

>>51021648
So Nicol Bolas is going to kill all of the jacetice league next set right

>>51021712
you got to pander to your main audience

>>51021712
as a 2016 earlytwentysomething I am deeply offended by the notion that I talk like that

>>51022065
hope so

Seems I chose right by not giving a shit about the story when I started playing 4 years ago

>>51022065
>>51022139
Yup. MaRo will be executed as part of a live stream, Magic will be good again, Yawgmoth, Phyrexia, Urza, all the good old characters that were always as great as you remember, will come back and usher in the Golden Age of Magic, and the SJWs and the liberals will all be blown the fuck out and God Emperor Trump himself will tweet you an automatic buy at every FNM you play at.

>>51021648
desu I don't think this would be that bad if you replaced that last line with "He's hot and I want to ride him" or something similar, hinting tha+t strongly at something while totally keeping it PG is just talking down to the younger members of the audience.

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>>51022169
I know your post is a joke but
>MaRo will be executed
What's the problem or joke here friend

>>51022202
Because a living, breathing human being with loves, likes, hates, dreams, and family would die to satisfy childish whims in regards to a card game.

Or are you from the nazi apologist thread and don't see a problem with that

>>51022169
>Yawgmoth, Phyrexia, Urza, all the good old characters
I think by this point it's been made clear that people don't want the old characters back, they just want the planes to be the central focus instead of the group of five idiots

>>51022193

Wouldn't have made sense within the context of the story since later it's revealed she's more obsessed with elvish carpet than Gideon right now.

>He's so damn huge. My head fits under his chin. He smells like sweat and oil, the grime of a long day lifting things.

>I burrow into his arms like a puppy, rest my cheek on his chest, and close my eyes. His heart pounds under my ear. He wraps himself completely around me, armor and all, breath tickling the top of my head.

>It's been a long time since anyone held me like this. If Gids had done this four years ago, it would have made me feel tingly in all the places I like. Now it just feels...

>...Safe.

>>51022270
and time and time again, it was proven that it was a garbage formula for retaining players and a complete waste of fluff for anyone but Nat Geo fetishists who wanted to have a complete story told to them via 200 combat-focused cards about an entire world, its power groups, motivations, and events.

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>>51022311
>200 combat-focused
That's today's problem, you dolt.

>>51022245
Yes, he must die and they must reprint all of the reserved list, improve mtgo and send me a booster box or 5 of unlimited

Remember when Walkers didn't act like children?

>>51022245
>purposefully misinterpreting obvious hyperbole for the sake of your argument
Man, your breath must reek of locker room smegma.

>>51022382
Owning the PW's Guide to Alara, I can confirm that 90% of it never made it into the cards because nobody fucking cares about the slaves who sell their flesh, mind, and soul in a desperate and tragic deal to escape the crushing poverty of their lives so that they can be mentioned on a single card that had no flavor text.

>>51021648
>>51022065
Tezzeret's tattoos were marks left by Bolas when he rebuilt his mind after Jace obliterated it CONFIRMED. So now I-have-daddy-issues-Tezz is stuck with ugly-ass red tattoos on his forehead to remind him who's his daddy. I actually like this.

>>51022437
Because truly, everyone on 4chan is always joking, and never, ever serious.

>>51022469
Jokes and hyperbole aren't the same thing.

>>51022169

>the SJWs and the liberals will all be blown the fuck out

I see no problem there

>>51022456
I care, anon.

Honestly, I understand the logic and everything, but when standard's red portfolio is nearly filled by 'Chandra blows something up', that's orders of magnitude more boring.

>Love triangle between Chandra, Gideon and Nissa

This is fanfiction tier and not even good fanfiction.

The parts about the Jacetice League were again cringey and horrible. L'Etoile has proven with his Ajani story that he can do better.

At least they try to give explanations for the retcons of Purifying Fire now, instead of pretending that it all didn't happen or that everything was a lie or something.

Only good thing was Baan, as usual.

>>51022275
fair enough, I tend to avoid reading the lore myself and just get summarised to me. It works because the story itself is fine, it's just the writing that's god-awful.

>>51022536
You're right, anon. I miss it when Goblins Doing Something Stupid was Red's bag instead.

>>51022668
Nothing's changed, we just have a named Goblin on the packaging now.

>>51022683
No, Goblins are good, and work in Goblin decks. TUMBLR SHITBAG is awful, and works in nothing but the Jacetice League

>>51022778
Let me call Chandra a goblin in peace.

>>51022821
No. Why the fuck should you be allowed to enjoy the Jacetice League?

>>51023071
Because if I clasp my hands together and pray hard enough, maybe Battered Wife Syndrome will kick in and I'll be happy

>>51021712
Guess who's writing this shit.
That exact sentence could have been perfectly bearable if Chandra sounded like a real woman who's spend all his youth in a secluded rural temple and not like what an urban millenial twat thinks young women sound like.

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>>51021648
THIS STORY CONTAINS REFERENCES TO SUICIDAL THOUGHTS

>>51021712

I think I could tolerate everything else if it wasn't for this.

>>51021648
I think a lot of you have too high expectations for a card games storyline. When was it ever good?

>>51023071
Because you're the guy in the corner grumbling while everyone else is doing shit they like.

>>51024204
Weatherlight

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>>51021648
Owo what's this

>>51024204
What magic has consistently done well is, for lack of a better term, atmosphere. With card art and flavor text (Some examples not withstanding), magic does an excellent job conveying the worlds it takes place in. Long term, conceptual elements of the story are also well done.

Where it falls apart is characters. WoTC cannot write characters for the life of them, and their dialog skills are somehow even worse. That wasn't always a problem.

The GW isn't bad because its character focused, its bad because its character focused and WoTC doesn't know how to do characters.

Think of the cards Mikaeus, the Lunarch and Mikaeus, Unhallowed. That's neat, that's what they're good at. Now think of the oath cards. See the difference?

>>51024378
lol nobody enjoys Jacetice League. Wait a minute... are you just a viral poster for WotC?

>>51025292
This exactly. WotC's no good at characters and especially at constructing a satisfying plotline, because the needs of the game and its release schedule will always screw that over. They can manage passable wordbuilding, but that's about it.

>>51024204
Never. Weatherlight started off ok, if generic, but went belly-up partway through.

>>51023522
Well it caused them in me if that counts

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>>51021648
A few things I noted.

One, for as much as I've hated the guy up until now, I actually really like Baral. He's probably the most not-Blue-yet-still-mono-Blue character I can imagine.

Two, why the fuck are the Gearhulk not Legendary if the story is going to treat them as such? I get that some people will actually like this more for gameplay purposes, but my inner Vorthos is tearing itself apart about this. Get your fucking shit straight, Wizards!

Three, that bit about suicidal thoughts wasn't even that bad! It was totally within Chandra's character to think like that (as well as it being well within Red's purview of qualities). On top of that, despite being rash and shortsighted, it would have been heroic in its own way. SJW's need to grow the fuck up and realize that everything isn't going to be sunshine and rainbows forever. Quit polluting my lore, you fucks!

>>51025567
>>51025292
WotC is good at characters, but it's better at character moments than ongoing narratives. Geralf and Gisa were initially names in flavor and letters, telling a disjointed story in snapshots. People fucking loved them. half of the one-shot story characters are better than the gatewatch because they have to breathe life into the character, makes us care, and nake them do something all in one story (and the other half fail because they don't do one or more of those)

even the gatewatch can be good, or at least tolerable in small doses. the best gatewatch stories involve three or fewer of them, as soon as you have four or the whole team, it goes to shit because wizards is trying to tie up their narrative or shove the plt along en masse instead of giving us worthwhile characterization. WotC can build up big worlds, they can show us nice snapshots of those worlds, they can't tell a story to save their lives.

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>"I won't forget this, Baan."
>"Excellent. I do not care to repeat myself."

I don't care if he's a Marty Stu, Baan is great.

>>51022065
>implying jace won't just mind crush bolas through the power of friendship and maro's drug habit

>>51025753
Yeah, that's fair. They've had reasonable success with flavor-text based characters over the years, and Jace has actually had his share of good stories when the focus is just on him and not trying to work the whole team in.

>>51025878
I like how he just goes up to Baral after he got wrecked and arrests him for overstepping his bounds.

>>51025970
all the gatewatch are better without the rest of the gatewatch, and you can judge the quality of the story by the headcount, with some error for the specific characters involved (if kimberly's writing nissa it's garbage, and none of the writers have a decent grasp of writing chandra as anything but an ADD tween until very recently). go back to jace and lili's date and ravnica and just check each story for number of walkers and general quality. all of it is fine excepting nissa's bipolarity up until chandra ex machina makes everything stupid, then in istrad is fine up until that one episode of the real world: ravnica, then most of kaladesh has been fine save chandra's inability to metally pass puberty. and even then the human moments between her and her mom and mrs pashiri work fine. this last story had ups and downs but she was largely grounded, it was above average for a magic story, and it was a story about primarily three of the gatewatch with jace benched and two cameos.

>>51025878
How is that he seems immune to bad writing, even among the same authors?

>>51025750

Story wise, they were contest entries. Prototypes. They can and will be mass produced eventually, nothing inherently special about them, but for the moment there is only one of each.

>>51021712

Honestly, that's mostly a problem with this specific author. All of the cringy gatewatch dialog that /tg/ has posted since Kaladesh started have been written be L'Etoile.

Which is fucking weird, because he can write other characters and scenes just fine. But he has a really weird idea of how to write Chandra, and its 'slip into chaotic stream of consciousness writing and talk like a child'.

Which I can alllllllmost see the logic behind, but it just doesn't work.

'Burn', for all its faults, its still goddamn MILES above Homesick, which was awful in every way. So he is improving.

>>51026895
Huh. Must have missed that bit. Then again, I also missed the fact that Alesha is apparently transgender the first time around... not that it amounted to fucking anything.

>>51026895
Well, one each of Black and Red, as well as part of Blue.........

Green got notably Liliana'd while White got "Beefslabbed"

>>51027462
I feel like Gideon's new nickname should be Spanner.

>>51022065
Nickelback will be gutted and set on fire by friendship. :^) the phyrexians are gonna get it afterwards too.

Can some give me a tl;dr version of this?

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>>51022245

>a living, breathing human being with loves, likes, hates, dreams, and family

You list all that shit as if they aren't the lowest of the low of common denominators, applying to pretty much everybody on the goddamn planet.

A nuisance is a nuisance.

>>51028692

>Dovin is the only one getting anything done while Tezzeret yells at everybody
>Tezzeret takes over Dovin's plane, sends Dovin and Baral to lure Chandra and maybe Pia into a trap
>Chandra acts like a teenager
>She also wants Gideon to take her to pound town
>Baral taunts Chandra, leading her and Nissa away while everybody else attacks the Renegades
>Gideon throws himself while invincible into the gears of a Gearhulk to stop it
>Chandra and Baral fight, Chandra nearly gets killed then Nissa, Gideon, Lesbian Artifact Grandma, and Ajani save her
>Dovin arrests Baral because taunting Chandra he revealed all the illegal stuff he did and lied about
>Pia and Chandra hug while having a moment
>Gideon is a bro and gets them ten minutes alone to be mom and daughter

Anything I missed?

>>51022275
Is this supposed to demonstrate that Chandra sees Gideon as a replacement daddy figure, or that she wants to fuck him? Or both?

>>51028891
>Dovin arrests Baral because taunting Chandra he revealed all the illegal stuff he did and lied about

Jesus christ. Saturday morning cartoon villain.

>>51029050

She wanted to fuck him silly some time ago, but right now sees him as a daddy figure, probably because Nissa is the newest crush. As fits red she moves on quickly.

>>51028891
>Ajani
Huh

>>51028891

So in the end, Baan will arrest himself for allowing Tezzeret to do all that shit, right?

>>51029136
I just don't see how anyone could be attracted to Nissa. She isn't even that good-looking and her personality is bland whenever she isn't literally Hitler.

Replacing Garruk as the main green walker was a mistake.

>>51022169
Damn maro, you really can't handle criticism, can you?

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>>51029179

A lot of Nissa's art isn't even good. Compare pic related

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>>51029224

to this

Same set, even

>>51029118

Yeah, Baral was always a sadistic dipshit. His status as a mage hunter made him an indispensable tool, though. As long as his targets were enemies of the state anyway, no one in power cared much that he was an evil fuck.

Dovin, however, does. Technically, Dovin doesn't even arrest Baral for being evil. He arrests him for lying about it on his paperwork and using consulate resources to do it. Because Dovin actually believes in the system.

>>51029174

I'm pretty sure that Baan is being set up as the 'one sane man' who will end up in charge of Kaladesh when this is all over.

Pia leads the revolution, but she has neither the ability or inclination to run an entire country. Baan does, and he is too autistic to be evil. He is like a calculator: he does the math for whoever asks it of him, but he never stops to wonder if they are using him for the right ends. He just implicitly assumes that the consulate, by right of being the consulate, is on the side of order and thus is right.

Tezzeret won't have to do much to prove to Baan that that consulate needs reform.

>>51022537
>Love triangle

I don't know. I feel like this story firmly cemented Gideon as not in the running anymore and he's not the type to push boundaries.

However this story did have a "platonic hug interpreted as a romantic hug by the real love interest" moment which is pure fan fiction tier bullshit

>>51029619

Ehh... Nissa and Chandra strike me as Platonic Soul-Buddies more than Lesbians. I mean, there's a closeness there but I am not seeing any real romantic feelings. And sure, Chandra describes Gideon's hug as being safe rather than making her tingle, but she also wasn't really looking for a romantic hug; she wanted somebody to embrace her warmly, caringly.

I'm not saying you're neccessarily wrong but it's more shipbait than anything else.

>>51029809
I think the parallel we're supposed to draw is that Gideon makes her feel safe like her dad did and is giving her the embrace he can't. It's no coincidence this is happening right around the same time she reunited with her mom. It also probably helps on some level that Gideon is effectively an immortal being while she's coping with her father's mortal demise, thus making it "safer" to put those feelings on him.

This means she's lot closer to Gideon than previously when she only thought of him as schlickbait, but not necessarily closer in a romantic way. There's a million different writers writing these characters though so some developments will just get swept under the rug.

>>51029965
Does this mean that Gideon is gonna bang Chandra's mom?

>>51030041
Could be an interesting development if only for Pia bullying Chandra about it.

>>51029965

Its interesting that Chandra seems to be gravitating to what she sees as islands of stability.

Gideon is, if nothing else, super dependable. He doesn't back out on you, and with his particular skillset he is the rock of the group.

But where Gideon is physically stable, Nissa is sort of spiritually stable. Chandra sees Nissa as having her shit together in a way that Chandra can't even really understand, and she envies how much control Nissa seems to have. Which is funny, because everything we ever see from Nissa's perspective is confusion and feeling like she doesn't belong.

Compare that tot he other members of the group. Chandra barely thinks about Jace at all, and she only hangs out with Lilliana when Lili is manipulating her.

Chandra is so Red it hurts, but it looks like he desperately wants to be less flightly and scattershot, but doesn't know how to get her life together beyond clinging to those she thinks already have it together themselves.

>>51029809
The way I see it is there's definitely going to be relationships between Gatewatch members.

I feel we're in for another year or two of will they won't they with Jace and Lili so they're off the table

Among the remaining members it feels like they're going with Chandra/Nissa to hit the gay main character checkbox. It feels like they've acknowledged Chandra had some romantic feelings for him but they've simmered down to just finding him hot while he's a friend.

Since Nissa couldn't really go with anyone else she goes best the raging ball of emotions that is Chandra.

This lets Gideon play the role of stoic justice man

>>51030213
GideonxJustice is the only OTP

>>51030267
100% on board with him and Ajani being justice bros

>>51030304
They need to head to Gideon's home plane and rescue Elspeth from hell so they can really get the Justice flowing.

>>51030332
White is truly the best protagonist color

>>51029247
I think the main issue with vital force is that the bottom-up angle isn't very flattering since that angle tends to make the person look fatter. It's a common tactic to take pictures from a top-down angle to give the illusion of being thinner after all.

>>51029179
I think for the most part the main cast has suffered from being bland. As the "faces" of Magic I expect WOTC to want them to be as likeable as possible. But I also think there's a disconnect between how characters are perceived on cards versus the stories. Just compare the vibe you get from Jace's flavor text to the actual fumbling he does in the stories for example.

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Gideon is the best.

>>51021648

Have to admit this is pretty weird to see in a Magic story, not even sure that the Purifying Fire (Which I think was written by a romance novelist) or the Brother's War which sort of dealt with a love triangle between Urza, his wife, and Mishra, had writing like this.

>>51022311

The plane concept is cool, but truly the problem is that the planes themselves can be hit and miss and the stories and such for them would be rushed so they could be completed in three sets. Even older sets got the three book treatment for some reason. The only books that seemingly didn't suffer for this were the ones that were part of the main storyline and thus the planes took a backseat to focusing on the characters.

>>51022456

Planeswalker's Guide to Alara was small, but it was neat and did seemingly give you a much more flavorful look at the shards than the actual cards themselves did.

>>51024204

Admittedly I was a child/teenager, but the main story with Urza and the Weatherlight didn't seem that bad. It possibly helped that the majority of characters weren't planeswalkers and the planeswalkers were for the most part crazy in one way or another due to being immortals. Urza's journey into Phyrexia with a team of planeswalkers has an element of fun to it because for the most part another element of being a planeswalker was distrusting or out right hating other planeswalkers.

Really though I haven't kept up with Magic in years and can't attest to the current quality of the writing. With the current crop of characters I can remember enjoying Agents of Artifice, Test of Metal, and the interactions between Sorin and Nissa in the Zendikar novel.

>>51029341
>Tezzeret won't have to do much to prove to Baan that that consulate needs reform.

Or, more likely, that the consulate is so corrupt and spineless that they let a raving lunatic scare them so shitless that they made him Head Judge of this year's Inventor's Fair, and THEN Head Consul (which sounds like he basically crowned himself king).

There's obviously some degree of corruption in the system (exhibit A: Baral) and inventors getting shuffled off or straight up disappearing in some cases even prior to Tezzeret showing up. But Psycho McBitchface 5000 turned that knob to 11 and ripped it off, leading to the current state of affairs on Kaladesh.

Combined with Rashmi accidentally (re)inventing inter-planar travel and giving the keys to said insane cyborg, who last we saw was the blunt tool of a very powerful, very old, and decidedly evil Planeswalking Elder Dragon. No, not Ugin, the other one.

If I were the one writing this story (not saying I'm a good writer or anything), but it ends with the Jacetice League succeeding in overthrowing the main Consulate government. Mama Nalaar helps rebuild stuff (literally) while Baan helps run the government side of stuff. The rest of the team chases after Tezzeret, who probably escapes like a Saturday morning cartoon villain through the planar gate (with the plans for it too) and to Bolas' current base of operations, not!Egypt.

>>51030517
We need a story of how a random stranger popped up on Kaladesh one day and managed to attain so much power so quickly

I mean do background checks just not exist? Motherfuckers got no paperwork

>>51030332
Oh god, I just remembered that Gideon's home plane in Theros, and there's a good chance he's not been back to it since Theros block happened.

It is going to end up being Gideon + Ajani doing a "descent into the Underworld" to rescue Elspeth, and probably kill a god or two along the way (most likely them killing Heliod and Elspeth becoming the new god of the sun).

>>51021712
>talks like a 2016 earlytwentysomething

You should really go outside once in a while.

>>51021712
More like a middleteensomething

>>51030557
I suspect the simplest explanation for how Tezzeret got so much power is a combination of three things:

1. Being a really savvy inventor (thanks to his home plane of Esper/Alara, he knows how to work metal better than most).

2. Knowing just enough of Bolas' mind rape magic to mind fuck his way into power.

3. Straight up killing people who opposed him, as we've seen him basically be on one huge rage trip since being on Kaladesh (though this might be an act, based on what Baan mentally intoned to the reader).

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Off-topic but can Sorin fly? Many of the vampires on Innistrad can fly. Can he?

>>51031351
He created an angel from nothing, I think he's capable of flight in some capacity.

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>>51031351
How sad would it be for an inter-dimensional demigod to be incapable of flight?

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>>51031351
he can but he doesn't fly for the others plebwalkers

>>51031775
>skipped leg day

>>51023522
Wait...Chandra's suicidal? Haven't read the last 7ish stories.

>>51031896
she was. briefly. kinda.

She was going to blow herself up, no one got a trigger warning when Barrin did it.

>>51031908
>she was. briefly. kinda.
Explain.

>>51031941
He did. In her fight against Baral she had a moment where she was ready to nuke him and herself to just end it because she realized she kept fucking up

Nissa came up behind her and went all IMAGINE YOURSELF IN A FROZEN FOREST and got her to step back from that ledge

>>51031941
literally she was pissed and about to blow herself up, then nissa grabbed her from behind and was like "if you go, so do I" and chandra was like "no, run away" and then nissa talked her down from blowing herself up. all the suicidal thoughts were basically like three sentences.

>>51030570
Nah bro they're both going to go, only to find that she's been stolen by the mulitverse's greatest thief Dack Fayden. He got lost in the underworld since the last time we saw him and Elspeth rescued him now they're hanging out ruining Ashioks plans and what not.

>>51031351
he is not.>>51031450

SOrin is not a vampire capable of flight, the "power" of flight is a random blessing for Vampires.

it is called the same thing by vampires, angels and demons, simply "the power" for a lack of a real name, Sorin never had it.

he can run up walls and such, but not fly, he has other weaknesses he doesn't like others to know as well, and some do, and that is why he lost to Nahiri.

>>51031941
She was feeling really pissed at Baral after all the taunting and goading he did throughout the fight, and combined with the feeling of uselessness and seeing people she liked/cared for being injured (or from her POV, dying) all around her, decided it would be better if she went supernova and took out herself, Baral, and whoever else from the Consulate was in the area.

Nissa talked her off the ledge, then into diffusing said supernova building up inside her clenched hands (which is why her hands are all black and charred and bandaged at the end of the story, when Gideon's carrying her to get treated by Ajani).

>>51030557
>>51030636
>"Who are you and why should we listen to you?"
>Lookit dis
>Flashes fancy gizmo
>"Well I guess he's on the level

Mindrape anyone who thinks otherwise, stab anyone left after that. It's foolproof.

But seriously, he could've been on the plane plotting for months. He could've been using someone else to get him started, either with more mind magic, bribery, or social manipulation. Then from there it's a few steps to Head Judge. And maybe a few heads.

In the current crisis, he just has to be the loudest, with a (recent) history of achievements that make give him temporary SUPER JURISDICTION. It's honestly a commonly used trope from most villians' sudden rise to power. Be the biggest bad during a civil war and take all the power.

But enough about Tezzeret. Let's talk about the best character on Kaladesh: Dovin Baan.

Seriously, the writing on him so far has made him awesome. He's seen through Tezzeret's "tantrums", as well as seemingly being able to understand the cause and effect of all the chaos going around him. He has the typical air of someone who knows what should be done, but just can't do it because he knows people are too stupid to listen to him and he won't subvert the system to make things work.

He should be in charge of the consulate. It currently (before and during the revolt) has this air of "we're the right idea with the wrong people in charge". From what we've been given to understand Baan, everything he does is for the sake of the rules. Nothing he does really indicates a predilection for gaining power for the sake of power, and so far the most flawed thing about him is how aloof and mildly OCD he is.

>>51021648
Does anybody want to make a greentext of this from Gideon's POV? And I'm wondering if anybody has screencaps of the other ones.

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>>51034433

>>51034145
Not to mention the mild OCD seems to be a racial trait of most of the vedalkin's on this plane, as Rashmi's assistant also has some OCD-ish tendencies in him.

I feel like they're basically being written as fantasy Vulcans, which is weird, because Vulcans were meant to be space Elves. But the vedalkin's can't be elves because Elves on this plane are (basically) Nissa without the autism, and instead of elemental magic focus more-so on making "life" out of metal and probably being the people most suited to use/manipulate aether.

>>51025750
1. How on earth is he blue and nothing else? From what little we've seen and heard of him he's been nothing but vicious and ragey
2. Has been noted, there's only one of each for now but there probably will be more. Raises some interesting questions though, the consul could start shitting out Skysovereigns although I guess they don't want to fuel/crew a fleet of them
3. Agreed, but the fact that they're willing to make the warning their SJW concession and not the content itself is nice

>>51034433

>Be Gideon
> Finished helping these renegades with fortifying their defenses around the water tower thingie. Should let us steal enough not!water to power the cool flying ship we're gonna use for our base.
> Should check in on the others, while Jace is off doing blue stuff.
> ... Why's Chandra twitching under the blankets?
> *Chandra word vomit*
> Whoa girl, slow your roll. I get you, you did some fucked up shit in the past, but you're aware of it now and trying to do right. It's the effort that matters, keep it up.
> ... A hug? Sure, why not? (Dear Heliod please don't let her feel my boner during the hug).
> *Nissa plate clattering*
> Wait, elf lady, it's not what it looks like... Gods damnit.
> *Baral calling Chandra out, and she falls for it, as the Consulate attack*
> No, raging boner, we have to do what's right and protect the people, not chase after the hot girl... Who is literally on fire right now.
> *Some time later, 1 Gearhulk killed*
> Note to self: don't throw my magically protected ass into the winding gears of a hulking metal thing. Just because I'm indestructible doesn't mean the sharp, pointy bits don't hurt.
> ... What's that, random NPC, Lili's calling me 'Beefslab' again? ... Ugh, whatever. Let's go wreck some more stuff.
> *Renegade forces start to lose control of the tower*
> Wait, why are we losing this- Oh yeah, three-dimensional warfare. Right, gotta fix that for next time. Time to make sure everyone gets out ok.
> *Sometime later on the now-flying airship, Nissa shows up with a half-dead Chandra*
> Damnit, time to take her to kitty cat man for first aid... (Not that type of aid, boner.)
> *Chandra and her mom have a moment in the infirmary*
> (Aww, that's cute...) Come on Ajani, lets give the two some space.
> *Random NPCs try to talk to Chandra's mom*
> *Standing next to Ajani guarding the door* Chill dudes, the war can wait a moment while the ladies have some time together. (... Not like that, boner. Calm down.)

>>51021712
They dont auctualy talk like that but if they did it would make sense its there second largest audience

>>51034828
>Gideon "Lawful Good" Jura
>Gideon "If something is making you uncomfortable let me know, especially if it's me" Jura

Nah you're right Gids is bitches 'n bros lmao

>>51035154
Just because he's mono-blue doesn't mean he can't be an ass. He really hates mages, but usually turns said hate into manipulating them into doing stupid shit and killing themselves for him, which is a very blue thing to do.

I feel like the Skysoverign's uniqueness has more-so do to it meant as a show of force than an actual war airship, but things have escalated so much that they actually had to press it into war. Remember, it was originally meant as - basically - a flying spy fortress base that sends out a thousand little thopter spy birds to track and spy on people.

>>51035154
Because they've got a cycle of mono-color expertise cards based off of mono-color legendaries and they needed a legendary for blue so they went with Baral. He also shows no sign of using any non-blue magic.

I guess you could say he's slavishly devoted to an ideal of "magic is a disease that needs to be eradicated." His idea of the perfection that all blue characters strive towards is a world without magic, so he hones himself as a weapon to be used against mages.

I'd personally say he's pure Grixis (rather than Esper, considering that he just uses the law as another weapon on his crusade against magic) but hey, WotC can justify characters as pretty much any color at this point.

>>51021648
>a fucking trigger warning
Fucking my little pony had a character attempt a messy suicide in a crowded area if thats ok for 5 year old girls why do 12 year old boys need a warning about fucking thoughts.

God dam i have always considered all the wizards are turning into sjws whining to be retarded but now i really have to wonder.

>>51035220
That's true, though the whole 'psychologically torturing Pia daily' had to be a little red or black or something, and the 'I don't care what the plan is or the fact that there are other mages among the enemy forces to deal with I'm angry so we're diverting forces to these mages right now' thing that Dovin incidentally shut down right quick was very red, so I'm with >>51035234 on that one
As for Skysovereign I think you're quite right, I think part of it is that I don't really like the idea of legendary noncreature artifacts too much. Like, if you put the parts together just so (or get a Sculpting Steel to do the job for you) you're usually gonna get another of the thing you had. Harder to justify than 'there is one Pia Nalaar in the multiverse. This is her.'
>>51035234
See above basically. I kind of wish they multicolored the lot of them, I think a bunch of duo colored legends would've fit the presented characters pretty well

So is Chandra still gay? I heard they were ship teasing with Gid. Bi? Threesome with elf? What is it? It's immensely important to me to know this now.

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>>51023305
Chandra spent her youth in a secluded temple just like Avatar's Korra though. You just can't suppress the confused rambunctious whitegirl 'please dominate my cunt' spirit.

To properly enjoy it, you just have to ignore all the pandering SJW stuff and read with the subtext that they are dying to get fucked.
It might sound paradoxical, but yeah, in order to actually appreciate SJW pandering stuff just leave all aspirations for female characters you can respect at the door.

>>51021648
>He's so damn sincere. I liked that about him when we met. After I was done being mad at him, anyway.
>A very sincere, bossy, kind, preachy, thoughtful, annoying, adorable stick in the mud.
>With muscles in all sorts of potentially interesting places.
>And eyes with a million colors, like a landscape by...some artist who's real good at landscapes.
>Also abs you could grate cheese on, which I totally did not think about running my hands over for like six months afterward, so far as he knows.

Once you embrace Chandra being a sexually immature and vulnerable woman your testosterone will afford you shallow and base objectification which will help to tolerate her.
Probably the opposite of what the author's SJW pandering had intended but they have to tolerate our interpretation or they're just being hypocritical.

>>51035350
Wizards has yet, to my knowledge, made her sexual preference clear. She has displayed caring emotions for Nissa that some have his construed as a crush or some such, and she has displayed an admiration for Gideon's hot bod. Then again, everyone wants to jump Gideon.

Nissa and Chandra have had time to bond during the battle for Zendikar and this visit to Kaladesh, while Chandra has also spent some time with Gideon in the past when she was fucking around stealing some scroll or whatever.

So far, it seems that she has shared more intimate moments with Gideon by a slight margin. She's talked to him several times about personal things, such as her past or how shitty she's currently feeling. She hasn't really done this much with Nissa on account of neither being able to figure out how to deal with the other's standard behavior.

It's up to you to decide whether to read into this or not.

>>51035350
Pretty sure its bi.

>>51029269
>Mage Hunter
>IS A MAGE
why didn't Dovin point that out

>>51035250
>Fucking my little pony had a character attempt a messy suicide in a crowded area if
Wut? When did this happen?

>>51037127
While dangerous, having magically aptitude does not immediately make you illegal. It's similar to owning a gun in a population that is general anti-firearm. They tolerate it, but restrict the hell out of you unless your licensed and/or working for them.

>>51029050
Both
[Spoiler]like every woman i ever had sex with[/spoiler]

>>51037206
Every woman you've had sex with is a replacement daddy figure that you want to fuck? Interdasting...

>>51037097
>Then again, everyone wants to jump Gideon.

Charisma Anon.

>>51037249
Embrace the bad dragon anon

>>51037146
https://youtu.be/JL6T9_MZBLk
If dhx can put this in a show for 5 year olds out of fucking nowhere wizards can have a few suicidal thoughts in there storys without a great big warning.

Fuck they are both hasbro products so we know this trigger warning was not an order from above

>>51037407
I should clarify because its not totaly clear in the video she only survived because somebody else saved her

>>51037422
>>51037407
>>51037355
Please return to your containmentboard, horsefucker

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We're already aware how it ends.

>>51037407
That's...pretty depressing actually. I am impressed they let that air.

BTW, take care posting pony content outside /mlp/. Most of 4chan is in the market of "rabidly attack on sight".

>>51037503
>Waaah dont make relevent comparisons because i cannot handle people liking things i dont like

>>51037512

oh boy another rebellion set i can't wait.

>>51037512
>That phrasing
Literal highschool tier writing

>>51037524
Fine, here's a relevant comparison

MLP is broadcast on cable networks, which are already given more freedom than broadcast networks. In addition, MLP is slotted for children next to action cartoons, which danger and threat of violence is expected. At the same time, we are treated to a scene in which the situation is not okay on any level, and the act itself is still cartoony and regretted by everyone including the person doing it.

In the story, we are shown Chandra's thoughts and motivations, to where she rationalizes and explains her motivations in a way that is supposed to be at least an explanation if not justification, and presented in a way that is the character being true to themselves, not openly regretting and wishing someone would stop them. In addition, these stories are publicized and marketted not on an action cartoon channel, but on a website and social media, which has a history of caring about elements of mental health and traumatic events that people can relate to (No, wizards fighting is not a traumatic event that people can relate to.)

So yes, they are not relevant comparisons for the people involved.

>>51037512

So when do we go back to Ravnica for "Civil War 2: Where the Fuck is the Living Guildpact?!"

>>51037847
Well your not wrong that its worse in the story but difrent distribution channels does not change how ok it is.
You also have to consider the age difrence in the target audiences.

>>51030091
If it weren't for the fact that she acts like a child in a bangable 23-year-old's body, I'd actually really like that character flaw. It makes me think she's ridiculously fucked up in all kinds of both subtle and obvious ways. Hell, she just about blowd herself up juat to kill a man and make all of the chaos in her brain go away.

Red. It's a hell of a drug. And she's high with it constantly.

>>51037900
Different distribution channels does change how okay it is. Internet is considered more sensitive because it hasn't been around for very long compared to television, which has a reputation for being violence and morality lessons in children's programming.

The age difference in target audiences isn't as important here as the feedback and reception received. Feedback for new media is instant and able to be made by a large variety of people, while Nielsen ratings, not so much.

>>51038013
It changes how much you need to censor not how much you should.

Peoples objection to the trigger warning is a moral one

>>51038013
>the internet is more sensitive

This seems oxymoronic in the most disturbing of ways.

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>>51021648
>i-it's not like I wanted a hug or anything... baka...

>>51022169
In the context of a tournament, it's spelled 'bye'.

>>51037847
If you read about suicide and kill yourself, you did the world a fucking favor.

>>51038073
>Peoples objection to the trigger warning is a moral one
This
Its not about if its smart its about if its immoral
Wizards has backed off on op mythics and replaced them with this shit

Wow.

Tezzeret yelling at random flunkies.

Are they trying to make all their characters straight up pathetic?

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>>51037512
> Ajani swore an oath
Copycat, reminder that the first Watcher is Lim-Dûl.

>>51037935
>Red. It's a hell of a drug.
How do people let themselves get like Chandra? Being so impulsive and all that. I never got how people didn't grow up with a decent sense of self control and forethought.

It's still a good character trait though

>>51038293
You live in a White/Blue/Black world. If you're Red, we medicate, if you're Green, we just don't pay you anything worthwhile.

>>51038293
The chronic risk-taker and adrenaline junkie is a real stereotype, as is the blabbering extrovert that thinks before they speak.

But it's pretty much guaranteed anyone browsing 4chan doesn't have their mind wired in the right way to understand why people would be like that.

>>51038293
Honestly, much of her psyche probably never moved past that moment when she watched her dad die. She's still struggling with that moment. And so that part of her brain is still a child trying to make sense of what's happened. Combine that aspect of her with the fact that she's CONSTANTLY being pumped with the supernatural chaos juice of the multiverse, and you get a person who has very poor self-control + a shit ton of emotional problems. As soon as she saw her home plane and mommy, that part of her psyche that never moved past her dad's death, that part of her that never grew up, instantly reasserted itself. That's why she's acting like an emotionally wrecked child throughout this entire arc. Because for all intents and purposes, she is an emotionally wrecked child. For now, at least.

>>51038088
Not Savage Punch

I am disappointed.

>>51023522
Baral did a mindbreak and she tried to burn herself out of existence. It nearly worked, too - it seems like she may have created nuclear fusion.
>>51031941

>>51026895
He writes Chandra as though she has ADHD. Did the research, too.
>>51025984
>Or should I leave you to engage in more pugilism with the shrubbery?

>>51022270

Whoah whoah whoah.

Who the FUCK said that and why the fuck do they have such shit taste? Old Magic lore is a million billion times better than the hogwash we're being given now.

>>51038374
>a shit ton of emotional problems
>has daddy issues
Don't stick your dick in crazy, boys.

>>51022432

>Urza
>Yawgmoth
>not acting like childrens

>>51038484
Unless you're Gideon, who is both a man and can take all the punishment she can dish out. Being invulnerable is one hell of an advantage when you're boning your crush, who also happens to be a crazy destructive pyromancer.

>>51030517

It is also true that Tezzeret is in an unique position to climb Kaladesh's hierarchy.

He is an artificier planeswalker in a plane that revers artifice. He can probably summon more artifacts that the whole kaldesh has ever seen.

>That's where all the other Big Names are. Gonti and Kari and Saheeli and probably some people who don't have names that end in -i.

IS CHANDRA 13?

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>>51037512

>gatewatch rushes to confront bolas and get their shit pushed in

I WANT TO BELIEVE

>>51038275

It has been revealed literally 4 lines below that it is all a ruse he utilizes to get people working

And apparently, from Baan's calculations, it works

>>51038670
And as soon as Baan calls him out on it, he drops it.

Fuckin' A I love Dovin Baan.

>"Those devices are certified for external use only. A malfunction could seriously injure one's sph—"

>She gestured up at him, emphatically.

I find Chandra's parts pretty hard to follow. Like I have no idea what is going on to the point where I stopped reading.

>>51038828
ADHD.

>>51038643
>implying Bolas won't get onepunchman'd by Gideon

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>>51024988
Lmfao

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>>51023522
>>51021648
>This story contains references to suicidal thoughts.

They warned me about the SJW pandering, but I didn't listen.

>>51038551
I wonder how many boners Gideon has gotten from looking at a campfire too long since the Purifying Fire.

>>51038643
For the first set, sure. Then they'll get saved by johnny in Hour of devastation

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>>51038551
>ywn bone your emotionally troubled short-haired qt pyromancer crush

>>51040010
>Nicol Bolas looms over the Gatewatch, victory assured
>Sudden catman
>Ay lmeow I remember kicking your ass before.

>>51028882
>not cherishing the miracle of human sencience when as far as we can tell the universe stretching for thousands of years in all directions is devoid of it

You're the least deserving of this gift.

>>51021648
So, I just read the part where Chandra tried to kill herself. That fireball in her hand...

>blue/white fire is hotter than any other flame
>starts collapsing inward
>continues to consume air
>continues to output energy

Did Chandra just accomplish nuclear fusion? Did Chandra just make a small star?

>>51023305
>if Chandra sounded like a real woman who's spend all his youth in a secluded rural temple
>all his youth
>his

anon, what does your browser history look like?

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>>51022169
Trump commander when?

>This story contains references to suicidal thoughts
What was the point of that disclaimer? To avoid liability if someone tried to sue them or something?

>>51041667

In all honesty yes. People can scream about pandering, but it's not that they are pandering persee, at least not with the disclaimer, it's just covering their bases. It's like how fucking everything needs a warning label nowadays, even for shit that should just be common sense like coffee being hot and burning you. Because if you don't put up that warning and some dumbass fucks up you may be held liable for it.

>>51037512
>Ajani: Let's form a plan on Dominaria.
>Slivers; slivers everywhere.
>Gatewatch: Naaahhh...

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>>51021648
>Chandra almost became pic related in this week's story
So close...

>>51035350
Probably bi. This story makes it explicit that she finds Gideon physically attractive, but as far as romance goes I'd argue there's been more focus on Chandra and Nissa lately, especially with this story even doing the whole "Oh, I hope I'm not interrupting" cliche.

>>51041986
Gideon clearly still has a huge thing for Chandra, though. Wonder if this is going to get awkward?

>>51042015

It certainly will, because love triangles and drama. I'm just hoping Gid wins in the end, or that at the very least we get a threesome.

>>51040187

> the team tries to take on Bolas
> it goes badly. Like, SUPER badly
> Ajani comes up with a plan to sacrifice himself so the others can escape. For all his power, Ajani knows that Bolas will not pass up an opportunity to revenge upon the catman.
> Before he departs, Ajani makes Gideon swear an oath.
> "Out of those here, I know that you at least will take this matter seriously. I have a debt that must be paid, and if I cannot do it then I beg that you must."
> "I had a friend. And on Theros..."

I haven't been keeping up with the story of this block, is it known yet whether tezz is using that portal to get phyrexians to kaladesh yet?

>>51042206
Unconfirmed but heavily implied. >>51037512 says he's still working for Bolas and last we saw Tezzeret he was slinking around New Phyrexia being a slimy cunt. I'd say it was toward Bolas's intention to get rid of two big threats to his ultimate villainy: Eldrazi and Phyrexia. So he baits the Gatewatch into Amonkhet, tactically retreats and leaves them hungry for getting Elspeth back from Theros to annihilate Phyrexia. Then he'd be the final Big Bad of the game.

>>51042206
>Is Tezzeret trying to summon the assholes that hate him
>The assholes from New Phyrexia that he hated and still hates and was only around because Bolas made him hang out with them personally.
>That have probably tried to dissect him in his sleep at least thrice.
He was making a portal thing for Bolas, or to get a good weapon against Bolas. Phyrexians aren't weapons. They're a plague. And more importantly to Tezzeret, they're a pain in the ass he can't control.

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>>51029179
>She isn't even that good-looking
I don't know anon. Nature's artisan is a pretty pretty Nissa. Though yeah, she's kind of generically moe now. Plus have you seen her green mana batteries?

>>51021648
Legacy Elves:
http://tappedout.net/mtg-decks/legacy-elves-combodek/#c2912087

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So, just finished reading all of it and
>>51037935
>>51038293
>Red. It's a hell of a drug.

Indeed.
I think the suicide trigger warning wasn't necessary with how comforting Nissa was.
Honestly the warning drew attention to the detail in a spoilery way.
My cynicism even makes me wonder if they put the trigger warning in to punctuate the suicidal theme.
So I guess by
>>51037512
she has the self-esteem to resolve that suicidal bent. Most of which was stirred up by Baral's trolling.
>Red is a hell of a drug.
>Trolling people into suicide is literally part of blue's repertoire. 'When trolling goes too far.'
Pretty neat stuff actually. Two 'evils' of these colors explored, without the need of a black-aligned character stomping around and proclaiming necro-rape enslavement for all.

Cool story, Wizards.
And as mentioned with
>>51037077
I think there's enough to enjoy to let the SJW pandering slide. But don't push it, Wizards.

So yeah MTG story really has gotten pretty good since the origins reboot.

>>51042896

Indeed.

Honestly, there is a lot of good stuff here to work with. Some people are just too IN A HUFF [ANGRY BREATHING] about the fact that technically Jace is around here somewhere to enjoy any of it.

The fact of the matter is that the Gatewatch, despite originally sounding like a shitty comic book, has been handled pretty well for the most part. Even the parts of it that have flopped at least had interesting ideas buried in the shit. I personally find Chandra's POV scenes aggravating because they are done stream of consciousness style which is really chaotic and confusing to follow and comes off as really immature. But as much as I dislike it, I have to admit that the idea of the writing trick they are trying to use could be cool: modern Chandra is an emotionally immature ball of burny chaos, they are just trying to capture that in her perspective. I wish they would tone it down a bit, but the idea behind it shows they are at least trying something.

And despite sounding like a shitty superhero teamup, its actually better written than most comic books are these days.

>>51040275
You're a HFY fag, aren't you? Nobody else puts this much stock, takes this much pride in just having been born a member of the species.

>>51035350
Nissa is so hot asexual ethereal beings fall in love with her

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>yfw Phyrexia eventually invades Kaladesh

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>>51043067
You've never asked /pol/ about the "white race" have you?
Honestly that's not really surprising compared to this site half the time.

>>51043136
She has a fuckton of mana, she's practically filled with the prettiest, best feeling of aether. It's not surprising really.

>>51043151
New Phyrexia needs the red, white, and green suns all dropped on it at once.

>>51043052
While I can appreciate Chandra's POV RAAGE sections from an artistic standpoint, one thing about them frustrated me. It's hard as hell to figure out what went on in her and Baral's fight, because Chandra herself was too damn chaotic to know what was going on. Her perception was limited to emotions and FIRE. So I couldn't follow the flow of the battle and picture it in my head. I really like how incredibly chaotic Chandra is, but I wouldn't mind an outline of the fight either. The setting and battle raging around them was hard to picture too because Chandra didn't perceive them. That's the problem with strict POV pieces. The reader is just as restricted as the character. While interesting on its own merit, it can also be frustrating.

>>51041265
Yuuuuuuup.
It explains Chandra and Nissa being unwell afterwards too.
Radiation poisoning.

>>51042144
I WASN'T READY FOR THESE FEELS

>>51043606

> Ajani saved Chandra and Nissa's like on two occasions already
> Gideon swears an oath
> Jace and Lili get outvoted 3 to 2

TIME TO GO KICK IN THE DOORS OF THE GODS AND LET THEM KNOW THEY DUN GOOFED

>>51042144
Holy fuck

>>51035234
I got the impression during Magic Origins that he was at least partly white but maybe that's because Magic Duels used Consul's Lieutenant to represent him.

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>>51043389
Chandra's POV of the fight is actually a retelling of the account given earlier by Baral, marked by the point where he kicks her in the gut.
Yeah, the first part of her POV detailing their fight is not continuation, but retelling.

Which I think was a good choice.

>>51043052
>The fact of the matter is that the Gatewatch, despite originally sounding like a shitty comic book, has been handled pretty well for the most part.
>And despite sounding like a shitty superhero teamup, its actually better written than most comic books are these days.

Yup. It's a lot easier to follow MTG's storyline and check in with mia characters, too. Since they're all grounded in the same canon. Makes retcons etc cleaner. DC and Marvel canons are just a freakin' impregnable mess.

Battle for Zendikar story articles were good, especially those featuring Ob Nixilis, I feel.
Shadows over Innistrad had some really good madness descriptions.
Sorin and Nahiri in flashback scenes together read like a Japanese highschool tsundere pining for her senpai to notice her. And it was actually quite appropriate, and amusing.
Nahiri's character becomes psycho ex-girlfriend and it's pretty hilarious how all of Eldritch Moon is basically Nahiri symbolically keying Sorin's car.
>Red is a hell of a drug.

It's nice that Liliana is the one to save the day, though I think the creative team and the art directors for the card art need to be more in sync. Liliana, the Last Hope looks a bit too swag in her card art (which suits her character, but it was off for the kinda somber tone.)

Other than that Eldrazi are a good and interesting villain force but Mark Rosewater acknowledges they should've introduced the new colorless symbol early.
Mark's on record saying following BFZ with Emrakul on Innistrad as quickly as they did was a mistake.
It was so obvious Emrakul was on Innistrad that half the community was convinced it had to be a massive red herring for a new and different villain.

>>51021648
Do they yank whoever's not busy to do writing? This is actual official shit? What on earth. I've read any MTG lore, and now I'm never going to. This shit's better told in broad strokes.

>>51044770
It varies a lot

>>51022517
Try looking again without your mom's cock in your mouth.

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>>51041545
>C__Data_Users_DefApps_AppData_INTERNETEXPLORER_Temp_Saved Images_1479280614427.jpg
Does Mummy know you're using her computer?

>>51041700
>Even for shit that should be common sense like coffee being hot and burning you
It seems you're actually fucking retarded. The lady in that case recieved third degree burns all over her groin and was in the hospital for months. The point of that case was not
>durr coffee hot
it was that the coffee was actually hot enough to cause permanent damage to your body.

>>51041700
She had to receive skin grafts, Anon, and McDonald's had already been warned multiple times in court that they were serving their coffee at dangerously hot temperatures.

>>51038013
Despite the distribution networks there are a lot more kids watching and buying toys of pastel horses then there are people reading magic story.

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>>51045304
no she doesn't like me using it she's very mean

>>51041700
In that case the coffee was auctualy to hot

So
(A) I fucking love how Liliana has gone from this "Evil for evil's sake" Character to catty frienemy...I fucking love it.
(B) After reading that I like Nissa a whole hell of a lot more.
(C) Baan is fucking great, I hope we see more of him in the future (but we probably won't)
(D) what plot hole did Garruk fall down? I seem to remember He and Liliana fighting on innistrad and then that whole controversy with that enchantment but he ain't been back since. I'd be interested to know if he's gonna be a heel now, or if they just decided to drop him out of the cast due to the controversy.

>>51044399
I agree, the writing's fine. It's not high literature, but it's fine as official fiction to fill in for people who want more than flavour text.

BfZ was horribly uninteresting (and Ob didn't really hold my interest much either), and Innistrad was more interesting for its descriptions than its plot, but there's usually at least a few stories that I enjoy enough to tune in to another installment.

Kaladesh has been solid enough, although as a personal gripe I really dislike simplistic 'revolutionaries good, government bad' narratives. Revolutions are bloody, bloody events, and those that lead them tend to become worse tyrants than the ones that were overthrown. I get that 'rebels vs evil empire' is America's favourite story, but you'd think after all the shit in the middle east, they'd have cooled on the 'righteous revolution' angle somewhat.

It's kinda funny to think Baral almost killed someone who just torched two Eldrazi Titans a couple of sets ago (although Chandra basically "combo'd off" with Nissa to steal the game).

>>51048466
Yeah. Nissa channeled all the leylines of Zendikar into Chanra and turned her into a Death Star laser.

Baral just remembered to cast counterspell

>>51048466
Chandra's much better at taking out monsters and big things than she is about outsmarting a mage who hard-counters her.

On the other hand, she did prove to us all that she can basically make an unstable mini-star and go nova at any point she wants. What if she one day figures out how to throw that star really far, like a dbz energy ball, so that it didn't blow her up too?She has a lot of raw power. She's just terrible at doing things right without fucking up. That's what this story solidified.

>>51048594
The first time Worldfire came out I thought Chandra was the one who casted it in the card.

>>51048466
Chandra definitely only killed the Eldrazi because ghostfire and Nissa forcing the entire world to channel her energy.

>>51047987
>Revolutions are bloody, bloody events
I feel like this is what has been missing from a lot of literature in recent years and even in my own writing. War is a horrific battleground of violence and bloodshed; you can expect a lot of good people to end up dead. Course you can escape with mild plot armor for major characters by keeping them out of extremely dangerous situations, because losing main characters cripples a story, but it's hard to believe in a revolution if no one loses anything that the reader cares about.

Honestly, because who gives a fuck about some inventions being stolen? I'd be far more pissed if Chandra got her ass laid out and was out of commission for Aether Revolt, or if Momma Nalaar got shot to pieces, or if Pashri had actually died in the story. Making her survive was outright plot armor and it really detracted from the story. I WANTED her to die. I wanted the characters to lose something. But they didn't, and it kind of sucked.

Any flakers in here?

>>51022275
I mean, to be fair, the safest place in the world for me is in my boyfriend's arms. So it could still totally be shipping material.

>>51050026
haha, gay

>>51048637
Its not just the inventions. Its what they represent. Ghirapur is the city of inventions. like taking away computers from silicon valley, or vodka from moscow. Its important for their culture.

>>51050089
How can it be gay if I'm cis as Allah intended and have no dick?

>>51050424
You're going to get stoned for being on the computer without a man's permission talking about HARAM stuff.

>>51050587
My boyfriend said it was ok, tho.

>>51050615
Not your husband or father? You must die to preserve honor

>>51035250
Because the 5 year olds haven't been brainwashed to need trigger warnings yet.

>>51050790
And you know all about being a 5 year old

Nahiri redemption when?

>>51051405
When she and Sorin fuck.

>>51050790
Makes sense i guess

>>51048541
Unfortunately for kozilek there are no spells to discard high enough to counter channel fireball.

>>51051695
But... Channel is only 2 cmc.

>>51051645
He locked her in an extra-dimensional prison for thousands of years resulting in the destruction of her home plane while she was gone, while she wrecked his home plane and basically killed his daughter.

They're not going to fuck.

>>51051706
And you nut all your mimics turn 1 in eldrazi

>>51051724
Oldwalkers are kinky as fuck dude. You don't know how crazy foreplay gets when you're that old and still look good.

>>51051724
Shes a suddenly mortal welf and hes a nubile pumpkin boy. When shes done marinading him in his own blood shes going to come back for a succ and fuk.

>>51021712
Actual earlytwentysomethings don't speak like that. No, this is a cheap way for bad writers to sound clever. They intentionally achieve bathos, but because they did it ironically it's supposed to be funny.

It can be done well, for example Jack Handey. Or it can be done poorly, for example Joss Whedon. I think that it's become particularly popular these days thanks to Joss Whedon's inexplicable success.

>>51021712
Earlytwentysomething is pretty generous, at least for Chandra.

>>51024204
Brothers' War was fine wine compared to this. Even shittier novels like Prophecy are good compared to this shit.

>>51051922
>Brothers' War
Everything I've read about it sounds pretty shit desu.

Bunch of hyper-overpowered oldwalkers who do relatively nothing. Lots of kryptonite-tier hamfisted excuses for them to be harmed.

Crovax is interesting
Teferi is interesting
Squee
Karn
Mirri
Crovax

Urza, Mishra, Sisay and Gerard suck ass.

Phyrexians are pretty cool.
Elves are faggots.
Dominaria is largely boring as fuck. No wonder they turned it into the post-apocalyptic world it remains today since Time Spiral.

Phage is a hideous "Yeah I'm bisexual" nerd bitch who way too many 30something mtg nerds seemed to find hot. Stop it. She's gross.
Karona is godmode Mary Sue trifecta-fusion of waifus. And leaves plot holes in her wake.
Absolute dumb shit. At least she's hot and the technicality of her existing at any time guarantees no Phage can simultaneously be present.
Phage is shit.

>>51052670
Squee, Teferi, Karn, Mirri and Crovax are interesting*

when the fuck are we going to see more of my nigga Garruk? hope he kills some GW member.

>>51048637
>>51048466
ITT: Faggots who are wrong. hierarchy of violence, if she can beat one thing, she can beat the things it can beat. Her effortlessly beating eldrazi titans and then failing to beat a single fucking guy? Its laughable, unrealistic, and pointless.

God the Jacetice League needs to die. The fuckign obsession with making them the most powerful and most important people in all the multiverse needs to die, Maro needs to die, the fucking kids and spics at FNM need to die

>>51052686
Squee: LOL RANDOM GOBLIN! HE CAN'T DIE SO HE CAN KEEP HAVING ZAAAAAANY HIJINKS!
when will got stop your sinning hand

>>51053664
>hierarchy of violence
Okay one, that's not what that means, and two, your statement's still stupid.

Do you even play Magic?

Combo, control, aggro. Triangle them.

>>51053664
>I beat infect and infect beats tron, why can't I beat tron?

Quick queestion, is Sorin the only black planeswalker who isnt always a selfish prick? Are there others who are quote unquote good? Or at least have done good things.

>>51053773
It's the most amateurish, daft thinking.

>>51053773
>>51053761
rightrightright, I forgot that the millenials only know Pokemon anymore,because when confronted with their inferiority, they just scream "oh, i'm just good against another type of person, I'm not a fucking useless waste of money"

>>51053784
"Good" is defined by White.

Guess what White doesn't let Black do.

>>51054001
You're an utter imbecile. Go and masturbate to your power-level charts.

>>51054001
Fine.

Historical examples: Sengoku Jidai Japan.

>>51053664
My argument should have been that the Gatewatch shouldn't have been able to beat the Eldrazi in the first place. But they did, and that establishes them as the most powerful combined force in the universe, which essentially makes every other battle past that pointless because NOTHING in the multiverse that we've seen so far measures up to the raw power of the Eldrazi.

After all, if they beat the Eldrazi but lose to some 2-bit Consul puppet on Kaladesh, why would it be believable that they're still the strongest? Also
>effortlessly
Battle for Zendikar was anything but. Did you read the story or are you just trying to act superior on the internet so you have fap material for later?

>>51053664
>The fuckign obsession with making them the most powerful
Anon, I think you need to rethink what you just said. Besides bfz, the GW has been significantly failing and fucking up. They're not being presented as the most powerful. Far from it.

>>51053784
There was one character from Kamigawe who was black and cool, but his name escapes me.

>>51054110
I almost thought I went too far, then you go full weeaboo. Sure thing dude, whatever

>>51054170
Ramp/burn is not a pitched battle for the fate of the cosmos. Its literally one of the basic tactics of the game.

Is Gideon going to SAVE THE MULTIVERSE by summoning a bunch of soldiers and pumping them before a fight? Is Nissa going to SAVE THE MULTIVERSE by summoning a big creature and giving it trample? Is Chandra going to SAVE THE MULTIVERSE by oh wait big burn is literally what happened here. Is Lilliana going to SAVE THE MULTIVERSE by making someone discard cards and killing their fatty? Is Jace going to SAVE THE MULTIVERSE by drawing cards and oh fucking hell that was the plot of Dragons Maze

well fuck, apparently basic gameplay mechanics ARE how the Gatewatch is going to save the universe, we're just still waiting on White, Green, and Black to get their shit together and remember their basic gameplay.

>>51054001
>bait
Reminder to anyone thinking about replying to this post.

>>51054248
>(you)

>>51054248

Ramp Burn didn't save the multiverse. Ramp Burn was the finisher.

First they had to combo Ugin's Hedrons, Nissa's leylines, Thrassa's Bident and Jace to remove the Eldrazi's 'whenever an Eldrazi Titan would take damage, prevent all but one of that damage' effect. With a cumulative upkeep.

Then Nissa paid for that for another turn, dropped the enchantment that removed Hexproof and Indestructible from oppoents creatures, and THEN they finished with a Ramp Burn.

Its was a plan that literally only worked because Nissa hasn't missed a land drop in the past 1000 turns, and ramped on top of that.

>>51047887
>>51052876

Garruk's story is done.

He was just some dude that liked beasts who got mad because Liliana came to his woods and killed an animal that she found threatening. She took the chain veil (that Garruk didn;t even know what there) and they had a bit of a slap fight before she left.

The only reason that wasn't the first, last, and ONLY time we saw Garruk is because Garruk sperged out and followed her seeking revenge because he is angry and stupid.

He caught up to her on Innistrad and Liliana slapped his shit with the chain veil so hard that he started being overcome with black mana.

He went crazy for a while, a couple of planeswalkers that no one cares about stole a hedron from zendikar to siphon the black mana out of him, and Garruk ended up not exactly cured but stable and not insane anymore.

He promptly went 'fuck this multiverse, I'm going home'.

And then he went home.

He doesn't have any reason to be involved in... really much of anything anymore. Unless someone comes up with a reason to go to his forest, he is done with being important.

>>51054485
And here we see the LBGTumblrites trying to push our shit in. The only example of western masculinity, and he's described as unintelligent, unimportant, and "done".

>>51054248
Hey an Chandra's Nissa cast channel for her first. There's a reason that card is banned everywhere. Good ol channel fireball.

>>51054531
Oh my God shut the fuck up

>>51054531
>The only example of western masculinity
...no love for Gideon then?

>>51054531

0/10 apply yourself kouhai

>>51051735
> Implying return to Innistrad wasn't their foreplay

>>51038483
Bringing back canonically dead characters is a mistake and not doing it is part of why old Magic story was slightly more respectable than current stuff.

Old magic story was bad pulp fantasy. New magic fiction is MCU.

>>51054651

The only times characters have been 'brought back' from the dead in magic (not counting as zombies) involved time travel, which is notoriously unstable and has ruined at least one plane of existence every single time it has happened so far.

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>Tezzeret built a working Planar bridge
>yfw

>>51054612
>being this triggered

I think Garruk has a decent chance to return as an ally of Nicol Bolas, hunting Planeswalkers (like certain someones) for him, now that Tezzy is foiled again

>>51021648
>>He's so damn sincere. I liked that about him when we met. After I was done being mad at him, anyway. A very sincere, bossy, kind, preachy, thoughtful, annoying, adorable stick in the mud. With muscles in all sorts of potentially interesting places. And eyes with a million colors, like a landscape by...some artist who's real good at landscapes. Also abs you could grate cheese on, which I totally did not think about running my hands over for like six months afterward, so far as he knows
Christ, will they just fuck already?

>>51021648
Does Chandra's mom know she's a planeswalker?

>>51056213

Unclear. I don't think it has been said onscreen yet, but they have to know that Ajani isn't from around here at least. And if the secret is out on Ajani, it feels weird that Chandra is still hiding it.

I guess you could say that cat is out of the bag.

>>51057508
>I guess you could say that cat is out of the bag
Ow. That one hurt me, anon.

>>51057667

I'm not apologizing.

>>51055619
After Chandra gets her fill of green mana.

>>51021648
>Nissa carries her injured red waifu to safety
>Her elemental smacks Baral's shit in for touching her human pet
Adorable.

>>51053784
umezawa was a monoblack hero who used his devil may care ways to find the hidden reason for the kami war and end it. His grixis grandson would later beat nicol bolas on dominaria. None of them were walkers either.

>>51054402
Jace countered thassas bounce spell with rewind to steal her lands and the last bit of mana nissa needed to cast channel, you forgot that.

>>51055491
yes... that poster is the one acting triggered, not the autist spurging out about Garruk so hard he's foaming at the mouth.

>>51055619
Why does Magic's porn suck so bad? Sometimes I just want to see my favorite card waifu take a dick. Is that so hard to ask?

>>51058287
>yfw Gideon will never give Chandra a gentle, loving, vanilla dicking

>>51024204
No one is complaining about the storyline. The actual events that are happening in the story are whatever. It's the quality of the writing (or lack thereof) which has us riled up.

>>51058323
>implying that's not what THIS is
https://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/2231251

>>51058500
What am I looking at here? I don't read runes.

>>51058500
Too lewd. Not pure and vanilla enough.

>>51058408
>chandra ur beautiful and can do anything
>my pussy us so wet rn gids lmao get me nissa
This writing is perfectly ok anon, grow up.

>>51058651
>>my pussy us so wet rn gids lmao get me nissa
I wish Chandra talked like a cockney brit and not an internet neophyte.

>Oi Baral, yu cant, Ima burn yer arse swear on me mum, git ovah 'ere slut.

>>51058806
>Oi Gideon, ya stiff wankah is excitin' me girly bits. You up for a toss or two, love? I'm tryin' to get mah soggin' cunt plugged.

>>51060561
>cunt plugged.
>not coont ploogged.

>>51058548
"Mating press? What's that?" It's a porn meme

Has anyone read the Kaladesh artbook? What happens at the end?

>>51062394

>>51037512

>>51037512
DOMINARIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>51058806
>Cockney, lewd-talkin' Chandra
7/10 would totally fuck.

>>51024204
Weatherlight was... okay it wasn't that great but it was at least readable. And fuck you if you didn't think Agrus Kos was one of the best characters in magic history, with his consistent "everyone on this plane is retarded and I have to clean up the mess" mentality.

This twaddle is just that. It's abysmal, and if I wrote this shit in 6th grade and handed it in I've been given an F. The magic writers should be ashamed and MaRo should kill himself.

>>51041700
pour 200F coffee on your dick.

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>Chandra going full, near-uncontrollable, suicidal, rage mode

They should keep this in. Like reduce the hyperactive spaz a bit but give her some actual anger problems that at a certain point she just loses control.

>>51066124
Yes, please. I could get behind this.

Honestly, the only issue I have with Chandra's characterization right now is her extreme tumblr-tard ADHD. Everything else they're doing I'm fine with.

>>51037512
>Dovin Baan doesn't take over the Consulate

WASTED POTENTIAL

>>51068457
UW is a villain colour though.

>>51068457
Tezzeret needs a buddy to get him to his ideal self. He wants to be esper but he cant be white so he needs somebody who cannot be black to balance him. Also it looks like inventors need a vedalken sidekick or theyll just end up fucking dead in mtg.

>>51068476
>UW is a villain colour though.
>Dovin Baan
>villian

The way they are writing him, they are trying their literal hardest to make him not a villain. I mean he stands up to Tezzeret, arrests Baral, tries to minimize casualties in war time, and he even fucking goes through the motions of making his oppressive sounding laws and measures appealing to the people so they willingly go along with them 90% of the time.

Also were Azorius considered villians? They just made all guilds a bunch of dysfunctional assholes vying for power.

>>51068679
I'm sure if it wasn't for Tezzeret using the fair as an excuse to steal all the shit the Consulate wouldn't be that bad

Sram doesn't seem so bad, Dovin's fine

Baral's a bit of a loose cannon and Kambal but I mean other than that what exactly have they done

>>51068679
While mostly bureaucratic assholes in modern times, in original Ravnica I believe their guild leader was actual responsible for everything.

Trying to false flag as an excuse to gain more power or something

>>51068679
azorius was going to hitler up ravnica. Supreme verdict was going to kill everyone.

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>>51035183
Came here for this
your in the life of gideon is way worse than that other guy who was writing them before. If you're the same guy, your writing has gotten worse and isn't capturing how apathetic and caring Gideon is.

>>51040010
Or we can hope hour of devastation is actually the end of the gatewatch and we can go back to real stories.
Personally I preferred the endless Gideon battles against Eldrazi to any of the KLD block Chandra stories.
I really want to like Nissa but she's just your generic hippie of the group. Elf with a tragic backstory that can summon land to smash you, your car and have her tree drive a car could be cool but instead she's just growing mangos out of her armpits.

>>51041986
Chandra is definitely pansexual because that's a made up thing by tumblrfags and chandra is made to appeal to the tumblrfags.
Did you see the 'guy' dressed up as chandra during pax kld preview or whatever when LSV Mark Rosewater and some other guy are playing against fans?

>>51069443
Shes growing fruit in her pockets like an autistic kender.

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>>51048541
>>51048594
>>51048622
>>51051695
>>51051706
>>51051726

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>>51051922
>He's so damn sincere. I liked that about him when we met. After I was done being mad at him, anyway. A very sincere, bossy, kind, preachy, thoughtful, annoying, adorable stick in the mud. With muscles in all sorts of potentially interesting places. And eyes with a million colors, like a landscape by...some artist who's real good at landscapes. Also abs you could grate cheese on, which I totally did not think about running my hands over for like six months afterward, so far as he knows.

>Feels like forever ago. Was I really just nineteen? Like, a kid? I wonder how old he was. Or is. Either'd be fine. I can do math; my mom's an engineer.

>I yawn again, so hard my eyes tear up. I don't know why I say, "Gids, you
remember when we met?" and look at him sidelong through my hair.

Chandra is 19 or was 19 when she left Kaladesh. I'm pretty sure she was confirmed 12 in pic related, which is when she left Kaladesh.

>>51069632
why not put it that betrays in the pic, anon?
why is the spell chandra and nissa cast above them, but baral is above the spell he cast?
muh ocd
I'd also like to point out that Blue Elemental Blast is a card that Baral probably has access to and the flavor text Disallow shows that Baral really did just cast a counterspell where the Eldrazi just appear to be things that consume and don't think.

>>51069715
Emerakul proved the eldrazi were sentient on a different level of consciousness, like cthulu, and also most eldrazi spells pull parts of them into reality behind the spell. When actual kozilek kills your hand its a though-naught seer instead of a thoughtseize. Although when his drones go through your head it has to siphon mana from the plane.
Also baral makes disallow counterspell.

>>51069632
Actually a surged Fall of the Titans for 12 damage would have a converted mana cost of 25 on the stack. It doesn't exist a card Kozilek could have used to counter that.

>>51070090
Are you sure? I think it's an alternate cost where it'd be 13. Either way, neither 13 nor 25 are 12. Going to find out brb.

>>51070090
>>51071149
you're right, 25
>Fall of the Titan’s converted mana cost is based on its mana cost of Variable ColorlessVariable ColorlessRed, even if you’re casting it for its surge cost. For example, if you cast Fall of the Titans for its surge cost and choose 4 for X, its converted mana cost will be 9.
http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?name=Fall+of+the+Titans
It's like flashback and conflagrate.

>>51071149
Yeah. Alternate casting costs have no influence on the actual converted mana cost, which is always the one printed on the top right of the card.

Since this is the story thread, is indestructible evasion?

Flying is evasion, protection from instants is a form of self protection.

Menace is evasion, being able to counter spells is a form of self protection.

Indestructible is a form of self protection, is indestructible evasion?

>>51071198
I forgot that Emrakul also has trample, which is also evasion.

>>51071198
protection =/= evasion

Evasion helps your dudes connect past your opponents' blockers. Flying, Horsemanship, Fear, Intimidate, Menace, Skulk, Shadow are types of evasion. Trample can also kinda be considered evasion.

>>51071324
I know that protection and evasion are not the same thing, but I'm asking if Indestructible is a form of both.
I think it's a form of evasion. Is deathtouch evasion?
If my opponent is attacking me with Gideon or Ulamog I don't want to block their dude unless I have something with higher toughness so I don't lose a guy because I'm certainly not killing their dude in combat. They can certainly be chumped but I don't think that disqualifies it from evasion.

>>51071896
Ask yourself this. A 1/1 creature can stop my creature from doing damage to the opponent? If yes then it's not evasion or at least is a conditional one.

Indestructible can do nothing to stop an opponent that want to block from blocking. At best can make the opponent evaluate the excange.

Ergo it's not evasion.

>>51069632
I thought they just used hedron magic to make them killable, then channel+fireballed. That's why they were so weak at the end; they had just 1 health left.

>>51021648
Well, shit. Chandra's little stupid meltdown hit too close to home.

At least Baan best boy.

>>51072028
Yeah, and neither is deathtouch btw.

Just because you have disincentive to block the creature, doesn't mean you can't. Its your choice.

It's modal. Either you can block the creature, or you can't.

>Flying, Skulk and Menace.
If you don't meet their conditions for blocking, then you have not to choice but to take the hit.
It's characteristically non-interactive. Especially flying, since if you aren't packing your own fliers you are basically shit out of luck (Which makes me wonder why the fuck flying is so beloved by MaRo.)

>Trample
Trample, sometimes referred to as 'pseudo-evasion,' is a lot more dynamic. It's helpful to think of it as a 'reverse skulk' whereas skulk has a 'minimum power threshold,' trample has a 'maximum toughness threshold.'

>Indestructible, Deathtouch, First Strike
These often result in a 'bad trade' if you do block. Generally the problem is that to block you are probably going to lose a creature.
However, and this is the important part...
Unlike evasion, you can still choose to throw one of your creatures under the bus to save you while you are at 1 life.
If your opponent's creature has evasion and you can't block, you can't block. And you lose, simple as that.

>Protection
Meanwhile, protection from [color] and trample are a little more complicated. Protection in particular is a pretty fucking overpowered mechanic that does 4 things:
1: Can't be blocked by creatures of the trait it's protected against. (Protection from enchantments would make enchantment creatures from Theros unable to block the creature.)
2. Can't be targeted by stuff with the trait. (Limited hexproof basically)
3. All damage is prevented from sources with the trait.
4. Auras presently attached to the creature with that trait fall off. (Giving a creature enchanted with Unholy Strength protection from black will cause Unholy Strength to be removed.)