40kchan

>>50990364
P.S. you guys on this hellhole might have a little... rough ride with your tanks and aircraft.

Enjoy taking big blue dicks up your tiny little asshole, herefag.

>>50990364
lol

>>50990395
You inquisitorial twats are so annoying, btw, check your cyclonic torpedoes, the warheads are gone.

>>50990395
The Tau are the way to go. The IOM is crumbling, and stagnating. Did you also know that the emperor did not want to be worshiped and wanted the imperium to be secular?

>>50990395
Ahh, yes. Great I hacked into your cogitator network. Now all your battle plans are mine for the taking!

>>50990503
>this herefag thinks I'm an Inquisitor shitposting when the Emperor's Inquistion have better things to be doing, like tracing his cogitator and hunting him down

Joke's on you, dickweed. I've been on sentry duty on the warheads all night, just getting off shift now. When exactly were you supposed to have snuck in? Go back to /schola/, kiddo.

>>50990535
[citationus needus]

Dude, just defect to one of the renegade human colonies. They are protected by renegade space marine chapters that aren't chaos worshipers. Yeah, the colonies are a bit hard to find, but once you get in it's pretty cool dude. Btw, your children might be snatched up for Space Marine recruitment, but that the price we pay for freedom.

>>50990785
>renegade space marine chapters
>aren't chaos worshippers

Choose one and only one, herefag.

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>>50990364

I better not catch you in the jungle you fucking turncoat

>>50990809
Shows what education you have Imperifag!
http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Renegade_Space_Marine_Chapters_(List)
Enlighten yourself!

>>50990819
I better not catch you in the deserts of t'ros, my friend. Oh, did i hurt your poor feewings. Im sowwy.

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>>50990919

You talking shit on my Catachan brothers xeno?

>>50990699
you remember that odd little loader slave. That was me in disguise.

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>>50990840
What the fuck? This just gave me a dead link and redirected me to an Inquisition logo. Is this a joke?

>>50990931
I sure as hell am.

>>50990931
Yeah, i'll snipe you with my pulse rifle before you know that you have a large, gaping hole on your forehead.

>>50990945
The one the watch officer took into the storeroom who walked out ten minutes later walking bow-legged?

>>50990931
P.S. I am gue'vesa, meaning human helper. I am human, I defected to the tau.>>50990991

>>50990991
Oh, him. I took him out (made him unconscious because I am not about to murder innocents, not like the inquisition.)

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Hey everyone, Venedig anon here.

You fucking cunts

You fucking fucking cunts

Seems the Imperial Navy Anon wasn't fucking lying when he promised to pay my planet a visit. Imperial strike cruisers littered the sky, barrage after barrage destroyed our farms, a strike force of guardsmen and our Astartes friend raided our towns.

My own fucking family was locked in their barn and set on fire. I only escaped because I was out tending the fields when it happened.

A Tau Auxillary fleet managed to fend off the rest of The Imperials, but the damage was done. Is THIS The Emperor's "peace"? Kill as many people as possible and hope you catch a few heretics in the middle?

>>50990951
That because you are using Imperial Internet Service. You see, I am using stolen Ork Inta'Net Pluz, which the is surprisingly fast. Plus the Orks really don't care we are using it (since they seldom use it themselves).

>>50990699
Imperial truth, circa M31 faggot.

>>50991037
Hey man have a free hug. I am going to defect. MY entire world was caught in an exterminatus. I was off-world, thankfully. I know what is like

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>>50990535
>Wants to push against stagnation.

I wonder who's REALLY behind this.

>>50991061
Some inbred motherfucker didn't listen in church back on his backwater groxhumping agriworld.

>>50991055
I use Tau Bluebook, along with my tauugle cadre internet service, its blindingly fast, even faster than the imperiums rate of advancement!

>>50991101
I used to live on a agri world yes, but my entire world was destroyed in an exterminatus (courtesy of the inquisition.)

GUESS WHAT FAGGOTS MY TAU DROPSHIP (ITS A MANTA) HAS JUST ARRIVED, ALONG WITH MY GANG OF DEFECTORS. SEE YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE LITTLE BITCHES AHAHAHAHAHAHA! P.S. AN AUZILARY FLEET IS DESTROYING THE IMPERIAL NAVY ABOVE ORBIT!

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I will offer one, and only one reminder to all Imperial citizens upon this Noosphere network that the Xenos race classified 'Tau' is highly prone to the assertion of malformed data in an attempt to spread its heretical creed to Imperial data-networks. Current falsehoods correlate with known 'Water Caste' socio-engrams and as such should be treated accordingly.

Ave Deus Mechanicus.

>>50991176
Pssh, you worship a C'tan and you don't even know it. How's that for a redpill you dumb toaster fucker!

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btw this is me in my sweet new tau armor

>>50991126
Shouldn't have been fucking those grox then you heretic scum. I wish they'd whacked your planet thirty years earlier so I didn't have to read your tired tauposts over and over again.

>>50991212
shit

>>50991176
You worship AI in the form of machine spirits.

HOLY SHIT GUYS! I found a Necron Power Sword. I'm gonna ask my chapter master if I can use it in battle. He'll probably say yes because us renegade space marines are cool like that.

>>50991149
>>50991220
Make that thirteen years ago. Seriously, kid, get off the network before your drill abbot kicks your ass up and down the schola.

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>>50991081
Fuck the Tau! Fuck the Imperium! Fuck all of it!

All I can feel is rage, a bloodlust I can barely control. I fucking HATE it! To hell with the "Greater Good"! Where the fuck was it when the bombs dropped?

>>50990364
Yes! Good job Gue'vesa friend! You am be making descision of much wise! Imperium not like Tau Empire. We has much great benefit and rewards, commisars here not! Much pay gooder, food gooder, living gooder, you like much yes?

You say you coming at Tros? Is much good. Come and be finding me at Tarokeen, look four Shas'La N'dras Arara. Me hook you up. You want job? Me find you place on defense force. You like Tau? me find you company. Know plenty of Tau women with "Gue'vesa fever".

>>50991253
Look, *pulls out laspistol* stay down, and get away from the altar. You will become a monster. A nine foot tall daemon. Nobody wants that, so just stay away.

>>50991268
Right, also I sabatoged most of the defenses on my word which i was stationed on. WE should organize an invasion force.

>>50991289
Yeah, daemons are almost as gay as the imperium. Fucking Spooks!

>>50991240
Correction, abominable intelligence possesses self-improvement engrams that are abhorrent to the Omnissiah's vision. Machine Spirits do not possess the same paramaters, as cited by the studies on the Logis Engine and Juris imperatives upon the Silica Animus. Your ignorance of the inner workings of technology is quite indicative of your choice in inhuman masters, subhuman, an incompetence only rivalled by your inability to fool this network.

>>50991268
But there is one thing, I heard about Kronus, and what happened to the native human population. Will you make sure that kronus will not happen again. IT was a horrible embarrassment to the Tau Empire.

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>>50991212
... Zoggin' 'ell mate. An' 'ere Oi thotz da blue gitz were sahpost' ta be good wif tech stuff.

>siding with space communists
>thinking Tau bitches actually want your dick
>implying the Ethereal caste won't have you castrated and enslaved for the "Greater Good"
Fucking heretics, man. Dirty xenos-fucking heretics. Get exterminatus'd. I've got a virus bomb with your name on it.

>>50991313
My tau cogitator is 100% AI, no servitor brains here or there. It is much more faster than the imperiums one!

>>50991352
Tau do not sterilize! God! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THIS! IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE, ON KRONUS! PEOPLE WERE TURNING INTO 9 METER TALL DAEMONS! THAT IS ALL.

>>50991350
Sorry Mr. ork, that was a mispost.

>>50991365
Your misunderstanding of the Logis Engine is further proof of your inability to influence logical matrices with your deviant philosophy. A lack of comprehension in the layout of holy Cogitators, coupled with a poor choice in abominable intelligence integration, cross-referenced with your inaccurate and speculatory assumption on the data processing of holy machines does little to serve your cause, but by all means continue to assist me in proving the supremacy of the Cult Mechanicus.

>>50991394
This does not correlate with the Tau habit of forced sterilization. Xenos out.

Did you know on renegade planets we have... SCIENCE? Renegades: 1 Imperium: 0

>>50991350
I meant to show pics of my armor, supposedly they have the same of an ancient 'humie aircraft. I used it once for an history class
(my agri-world had some form of education)

>>50991407
If you defect, you can build and create as much machines as you want. The tau will give you free will to do so!

>>50991419
As we do on Imperial worlds, renegade, or are you unfamiliar with the Astromechanicum research installations and the purpose of Labratoriums? It is fitting that your own show of ignorance is the driving force behind your defection from the Imperium, and further proof against your radical miscategorization of intuitive mechanics as 'wise.'

>>50991419
Do you know that we have a sizable force on tau worlds Renagades:0 Imperium:0 Tau:1

>>50991466
Says the organization which hoards STC technology which could benefit the imperium. Says the organizations which is mostly responsible for all the stagnation.

>>50991466
What, you mean maintaining old as fuck technology and literally praying they still work? Don't make me laugh, statist!

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Me in my armor

>>50991501
Another base misunderstanding of a grander calculation, another blow to what little respect the Tau Empire might possess as a supposed people of 'intellect.' The Imperium does not know how to properly venerate the Standard Template Construct nor its ascendant Spirit, as you yourself have proven it would be a miscalculation to allow standard Humanity access to the animus of Old Night. So saith the treaty of Olympus Mons, the Cult Mechanicus will provide sanctuary within a galaxy of heretical, illogical and dangerous innovation.

>>50991529
Humor was not an intended imperative of the response, further, praying is but a part of the many rites that my kind performs upon machines both ancient and revered or new and untempered. You appear to be misinformed on the roles of the Martian Priesthood, perhaps the Juris have erected safety protocols to ensure sensitive rituals are not transferred to those who do not properly revere the Quest for Knowledge, such as yourself.

>>50990984

>he thinks gue'vesa'la get pulse rifles
laughingtaugirls.png

>>50991475
Did you already forget those red cyborgs in the Damocles gulf? Those were Inperium, you know, not some mysterious race which just happened to have better tech than the tau.

Also, what happened to Aun'va? It's almost like he was killed and the Tau are pretending he didn't or something...

Inperium: 2 Tau: 0

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It is only natural to rebel against such an unjust "emperor" friend.

Long have our people suffered under the armored boot of the Imperium.

Perhaps you will spare but a moment to listen to the revelations my people have come to before siding with such strange aliens?

>>50991658
You am meaning like Gue'la Imperium doing has been with Emperor-God for years 10,000? Checkmate Toaster-fucking Gue'la, get fuck.

>>50991746
Hey buddy, one tip. Try to improve on your gothic. It doesn't make you look educated.

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hey anyone want a pizza roll? leave a comment on this webzone if you want a pizza roll

>>50991615
Well, it is a myth. Gue'vesa do get pulse rifles, only when serious shit starts to get through.

>>50991790
No one wants a pizza role, mr. basement-dweller. Go jack off to some more anime.

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>>50991746
>tfw you see inferior xeno try to win argument with glorious human

>>50991790
Go home Nurgle, you're drunk.

By the emperor, here i am trying to enjoy my rations and have some peaceful time for myself and suddenly this faggot comes by, starts rambling about joining the tau and shit before running out of the trench into the mine fields. Fracking bastard must have gotten some weird obscura or something

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Thorians suck! No come-backsies!

>>50991672
Perhaps you would like to listen to my lasgun xeno fucker

>>50991896
/xno/ isn't the place for ration-eating, guardsman. Go to /ig/ where it's safe.

>>50991970
Nah man, /ig/ is just talking shit about commissars and cirkle jerks about lasguns, this is where i can laugh at xenos and how bad they are

>>50991746
Holy grox shit, i did not know they had network in the underhives or that mutants had acses to it

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>>50991746
Hey, Toasters need love, too! Why don't you go find a purpose in your life, or I'll come and give you one in death you little fleshbag!

>>50991559
Why the fuck have you got hooves?

>>50990364

You are irrelevant. But we'll get to you or your successors. They will have no saying what happens to them like you have none with the tau.

>>50992167
Those are just high heels.

>>50992167
Not only he abandoned the Emperor's Light, he tainted his body to look similar to his foul masters in a pitiful attempt to fornicate with one of them.

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>>50991746
>>50991268

Leave and never come back. I know that the Noble Ethereals have told us all not to start up that inter-Caste rivalry shit again, but I honestly don't know why you Fire-Caste are even allowed on 40k chan, escpecially /xno/.

99 times out of a 100, whenever there's a shitposter trying to derail a nice thread and a start flame war with some Imperium poster, it's always some bored Shas'La/O/whatever and it's always delivered in cringey-as-fuck, broken, Low Gothic that would make an Ork confused. For fucks sakes you guys are al let as bad as Necroposters.

Please leave this board to those whose experiences with Gue'las extend beyond shooting them, shooting with them, and (in a disgustingly high number of cases with you Fire-Caste) "shooting" into them.

>>50991289
nothing personnel kid

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>Be me
>Be Tallarn Baneblade operator who has survived battle with the eternal enemy.
>Survive Taros campaign.
>Get rotated in and then out of the Spinward front.
>Has seen worlds turn from the emperors light only to get fucked by either Xenos or the eternal enemy and have to save those still sane and reasonable left on the world.
>See Tau labor camps of castrated "Individual thinkers".
>Watch a unit defect, join the eternal enemy then smash against our lines being killed to a man.
>Get sent to shithole after shithole to spread the light of the Emperor in a Baneblade across his galaxy.
>Finally get a break so go on /xno/.
>It's just a Xenos circlejerk... again.
Every xeno loves talking shit till the full might of the Emperor gets laid down like the law it is. Though I will say this thread is the best example for why we have to purge the lot of you. To all you traitors when your Tau lovers castrate you don't come crying to the throne to save you, you already turned from his light long ago.

Also to the other guardsman and any tech-priest. Recently my Company got a new Tech-priest (Or should I say Tech-priestess) attached to our company after the last one was promoted out of our unit to cooler dunes far away. Regardless how does one go about getting to know one of these Machine ladies? They are always so distant and don't talk to anyone how do I approach and talk to her? What do Tech-priestess like to do? Seh does seem pretty fleshy for a Tech-priestess though, Holopic attached.

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>>50994643
>>50994228
>Fink'in dat dees ar' all ack-shu-ly serious posts
>Implyin' dat OP ain' jus' a Metal Git shitposta' 'imself

It Alwayz makez me Laff when Oi'z seez all dees humies an' Blue Gitz take da bait, an' yet still insist dat dey're da smart ones. Oi'z meanz really, git it togefa gro/xno/bs.

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Knew I shoulda executed him days ago.

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>>50994815
Orks... You know of all the xenos I have to put up with I hate you all the least. But a xeno is a xeno soooooo.

>>50994853
Actually is this that same gaurdsman with the Yandere, Blueberry stalker, or someone else?

>>50994643
++++
In normal space, the traitors aren't as numerous as they'd like you to think. So, there's no need be so infuriated. After all, heretics are attention whores.
Anyway, for your question...
Like machinery? Like the Emperor? Like the smell of oil and incense in the morning? Then, mate, you're in for a treat! Most low-ranking techies still have most fleshy parts. This includes the nether regions.
Just talk to her, pick something that you both like doing/seeing. Ask her about what she likes to do, other than praising the Omnissiah. It's simple, realy.
++++
>>50991037
++++
I am truly sorry, my friend. If only you truly knew WHY this was necessary.
Know, however, that the guardsmen aren't here for the killing. They REBUILD. While the war against the alien might take a heavy toll on our own kin, the men and women of the Guard are also meant to restore infrastructure. This means that your farms, your cities, your will be rebuilt in... let's see... about six months!
++++
Sorry if I made any mistakes in wording or spelling, I've suffered heavy damage during the last charge.

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>>50991037
You got to close to chaos is what happened you dumb Kuffar. You toed the line for to long. Also why did you post about your realspace info in /xno/ what did you expect flowers???

>>50995173
I keep forgetting traitors are louder not exactly more numerous just more pronounced when they are around.

To the Techpriestess... I'm thinking of trying to talk to her next time she goes for the rituals of the machine spirit on my Baneblade. Should I bring her Steel Magnolias or is that not subtle as a first meeting thing?

>>50995171
Pretty sure its the same bastard.

So i was captured by some Eldars and they destroyed all my weapons and told me ithey either can kill me or accomplish a prophecy that one of thei psychic leaders had years ago. How fucked am i?

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Hey /xno/, got a bit of a problem here. I am stationed on some backwater agriworld that I can't be bothered to remember the name of, and command got it in their heads to "join" forces with a nearby Craftworld.
Normally I wouldn't complain, one more target that isn't me for the enemy to shoot at and all... but this one Banshee just won't leave me alone. She follows me around like some kind of puppy, sitting next to me at the camp, trying to drink my amasec, speaking something in her foul excuse of a language... swaying her hips when she walks in front of me...

Anyway! What's gotten into her? What should I do?

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Much more comfortable then that cheap stuff the Emperor gave us.

>>50997953
Comfort is weakness entering the body, traitor.

>>50997937
Chances are your Commander is shagging the Farseer on the regular already, I say go for it. Those Xenos have muscle control like you wouldn't believe, Singapore Kiss doesn't even get close to what I'm describing.

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>>50997964
My friends beg to differ

>>50997883
Hello? I need help! These Eldar are nuts and are trying to convince me to do something that would cause the death of billions, i have resisted so far but i don't know how lng i will be able to resist their psychic assults.

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>>50993971
Hi impirifags, yet another defector to the Greater Good here. By the way, meet my gf, much much better than a humie wench any day!

>>50993971
>he tainted his body to look similar to his foul masters in a pitiful attempt to fornicate with one of them.
Whatever works, champ. At least I'm not a virgin anymore, unlike you.

>>50998011
Well, I won't deny that there's a certain... appeal... to them. But what of the Commissar? I like my brain matter where it is, thank you very much!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gphncPX04I

>>50998153
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CN--0Obv1n4&list=PLMJdVNpbz-5_zBRit1OxQkYTa2gSeDHKu&index=4

>>50998104
>Implying your Commissar isn't already playing 'hide the chainsword' with the twink Scorpion Exarch
Anon, if the top brass sanctioned an alliance with the Xenos, all bets are off. Go get your lasgun wet for the glory of the Imperium!

>>50997937
Can you find what world you are on? I might be on that Craftworld as a prisoner and i want to get out of here, please help a fellow trooper out!

>>50998223
Well, fuck. Since you put it that way, I might as well. Any tips or suggestions?

>>50998251
I don't know the name, per say, but the locals tend to call the area i'm in "The Great Flat" due to being flat as shit. Ain't no trees or hills to be found, just hostile winds and heretics.

>>50990364
>BLAM

>>50990699
>[citationus needus]
http://warhammer40k.wikia.com/wiki/Imperial_Truth
Get informed pleb

>>50998283
Can you find out the name of the Craftworld your superiors are working with? It migh help me for plan to get out of here

>>50991424
Sure thing, we believe you.

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>>50990395
>big blue dicks
>big

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*knocks ceiling with broom*

Quiet the fuck down up there, organic slime.

>>50998324
Well, their armor is green and white, so it might be Biel-Tan. Does that help?

>>50990819
>that is a catachan woman

>>50998338
Shut up, don't make me get the magnets again.

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>>50990364
Buddy, I don't think you walked in the direction you wanted to...

>>50998360
Tip #1: Have your rifle trained on their heads whenever possible. Failing that, when the shit hits the fan, run.

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>>50990364
Very interesting, I have someone who would love to talk to you about that

>>50998360
Yes it does, look can you tell your superiors to find a way to get me off this place? I feel their psychics are starting to break into my mind. If they need a reason tell your superior i managed to hid a stc fragment where i am being held.

>>50998038
You ain't even on a comlink, this is all in your head.

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>>50998338
>he's 65 million years old and still posting on 40kchan
Holy shit I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't see it.

>>50998437
I'll see what I can do. Just gonna warn you, it probably ain't much. Now, I'm off to get me some Banshee snatch... if I fuck her well enough, she might be willing to help me out if/when shit hits the fan.

>>50998256
With Eldar, it's all about the long game. These Xenos have lifespans of like 1000 years, they aren't interested in a quick hump and dump. Take your time, get her in the mood. Find a quiet corner, lean in close with your hands on her hips and kiss her softly, but with a firmness that shows your purpose. Lean in closer, pin her against the wall. Slowly slide one hand around to the small of her back, and with the other one lift her leg so it wraps around your waist and she can rest her weight on your lap, grinding her heat into your lasgun. Stay like this for a while, enjoy the moment, tease her with gentle touches and a soft squeeze. Then, when she's breathless with lust and her eyes are fiery with desire, gently lick her soulstone. After that, it's up to you.

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>>50998338
01100100 01100001 01100100 01100100 01111001 00111111 00001010

>>50998441
What?

>>50998256
>>50998492
WIT ORKZ ITZ ALL BE ABOUT THA ROMANCE!
YA GOTZ TA GET YER SHOOTY BITZ AND SPIKY BITZ AND WAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!

>>50998492
Everything up to the soulstone sounds pretty manageable. I don't think she's much like it if I did that.

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>>50998492
How did you kn-
Uh, I mean, this mon'keigh speaks nothing but lies!
Our women are sexually incompatible with humans anyway!

>>50998535
Well, then! I guess>>50998492
is right! I'm gonna do my best to make sure this rendezvous is fruitful. Dem hips, man...

>>50998504
Okay, managed to pry my commander away from the farseer for a moment to relay your request. If everything goes according to plan, you should be free to leave. Now, what color are these Eldar that have you captive? Are they paler than the usual ones we run into?

>>50998535
>Our women are sexually incompatible with humans anyway!
After thousands of years of decadence I don't think there is anything that Eldar aren't compatible with

>>50998575
The ones i saw the mostl ooked like this and ifbi understood they are called Exodite by the other Eldar seen on a battlefield

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>>50998618
Uh here the picture i managed to get

>>50998554
Yeah, the soulstone is basically a 'fun button' for a lot of Eldar women. Just be sure to bring some earmuffs, Banshees can get pretty loud if you do it right.

>>50998535
There's only one way to find out ;) And just because we can't have kids with each other, doesn't mean we can't have fun. You know you want a piece of that filthy, pheromone-ridden apecock.

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>>50998637
Could be worse, I'm deployed with Eldar too, but they all look kinda like this.
Actually, the one in this pict has been giving me this...look and I'm not sure I like it or not.

>>50998637
>>50998618
If they're exodites, then I'm pretty sure we can find a way to negotiate your release. What are they doing to you? The ones down here seem to be rather... friendly... if a little handsy.

>>50998665
I've got bad news for you buddy... Only word of advice: Don't fall asleep near them, and be ready to run like hell at a moments notice.

>>50994815
'dis

>>50998453
don'tforgetyou'rehereforever.jpeg

>>50998526
'dis

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>>50998667
Mindraping my mind to make me willing to accomplish a prophecy that would help save thousand of Eldar but killing in the process all humans in the system in the process...

Oh shit i juzt saw one new eldar that looked like this

>>50998883
Are you absolutely sure you're on a craftworld? I'll show the picture to the commander and the farseer. Looks like a Dark Eldar, from what Banshee-babe told me. If that's true, then we're in some serious shit.

>>50995171
>>50996341
That 'poor bastard' here. No, it's not me, I'm still loyal. Just a bit too busy to be posting lately. Plus, people seemed to lose interest.

>>50998942
Any news on your blueberry stalker?

>>50998975
Showed up a few more times after that, but she didn't pull anything so brazen again. Can still see the lump on her head.

>>50998993
She's probably just biding her time, Tau women are nothing if not persistent and stubborn.

>>50999005
Frak.

>>50998993
So by the way, what happened with that whole "Tau Ambassador gets assassinated in front of both the Imperium and Tau Empire's forces" thing? That ever get sorted out? Are they still looking for who dun did it, or is it looking like this is just a convenient excuse for war?

>>50998917
I did mange to take a picture of the leader, from what i heard she is forcing them all to work toward a goal of uniting the eldar and convinced the after taking the Caftworld. Seems this Craftworld is small and relatively new for a Craft world called Si In Mon

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>>50999251

>>50999251
Relayed the information. Farseer looked fucking furious and terrified about the situation, but she did give me a quick peck on the cheek, and now the Banshee is fawning over me... I guess I did good. They should be there soon to bail you out... hopefully.

>>50999281
You're fucked, mate

>>50999309
>>50999281 is what the leader look like

>>50999225
Thanks to the... excellent...diplomacy of the Hero, the Tau didn't declare war on the spot. No idea who did it, and the worst grilling we could manage didn't produce any results from the fat sack of shit called the Governor. Have more of us on guard duty then before, had little time to chat. How long was it, since I posted in the last thread?

>>50999334
That would explain why she looked scared. Good luck, man.

>>50999309
Abort, guardsman, abort! I've heard stories about eldar in the sack... does the idea of having a crushed pelvis appeal to you!?

>>50999404
I was more concerned about blown out eardrums, so I brought earmuffs. I haven't heard stories like that, though...

>>50999428
It's a Banshee, I thought it was obvious. And seriously, the tendency of unrestrained, unadulterated MURDERFUCKING has not left them! Do NOT stick your dick in crazy!

>>50999339
It's been a while, i think there were some Orkz who took over the last thread for a bit to talk about fashion and racing, but I don't think there was much else of note. So I imagine that thanks to the recent situation and your... "handling" of your not-so-secret admirer, the Commissar might have backed off a bit, Or is he still hounding you?

>>50999445
Damnit, I'm a mere human. I'm going to risk it, this Banshee has been crushing on me since we got deployed. If I'm gonna die, I might as well go out on my own terms.

>>50999492
Ugh, orks. Haven't had THAT much battle experience, but I have killed a few. Filthy things.

Commissar has a lot on his plate, but he's still keeping an eye on me, just in case. He's right to do so, look at the Eldar guy.

>>50999548
It's not worth it!

>>50999385
>>50999651
Any tips on fighting and an Eldar so i might survive and no i am forcedto do this before i get brainwashed by this bunch of Eldar

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>>50999732

Eldar are best fought in groups. The first trooper sacrifices himself to hold the Eldar in place long enough for the remainder of the squad to draw a bead on it and fry it.

>>50999732
Since you're most likely greatly outnumbered, fighting would be a bad idea. You gotta think of a way to escape stealthily and find a place to hide. If you can do that, the Beil-tan Eldar will be able to engage them, allowing you to make a run for it. You could also try talking with the exodites, specifically the ones who obviously don't want to comply with their orders. They might be able to help. It's your call though.
>>50999651
Alas, I must go and fulfill my duties as a man. A shattered pelvis is a risk I'm willing to take.

>>50999804
>>50999764
I heard the Eldar on this and they are weird, they follow whoever is the strongest and i know their leader accept challenge from literally anyone and if i won i would be able to survive for a while to figure what to do. The leader is maybe an Eldar but this way i get one change and i know the leader has a weakness, Which me luck

>>50999864
Good luck... you're going to fucking need it.

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Alright, are any of you good at identifying Space Marine chapters?
A bunch of Astartes arrived assuring us they were loyalist shortly after slaughtering a bunch of what they called "traitorous civilians."
I thought something was up when they started uh, wearing those people's skins like they were cloaks and chaining their heads to their shouldpads, but I dunno.
Anyway, they had blue armor and a bunch of them had skulls or batwings on their helmets.
Does this ring any bells?

>>51000097
Those are Raven Guard bro, you're fine. try to die quickly you poor sonuvabitch

>>50999864
Whelp... I guess he's dead.

>>51000788
Poor bastard.

>>51000788
>>51001477
Sorry i forgotto psot sooner, turns out that "Harlequin" as the Eldar cre called her was a bit clumsy since she managed to lose her balance and fall on my sword and luckily it killed her.

I am stuck being the leader of a craftworld now,any suggestions

>BE ME
>BE A GLORIUS ADEPTUS ASTARTES OF THE BLOOD ANGELS CHAPTER
>PLACED ON SHITTY AGRIWORLD
>BROTHER CAPTAIN AND HIGH COMMAND HAS MADE A DEAL WITH ELDAR
>TFW ELDAR FROLIC EVERYWHERE
>I THINK BROTHER CAPTAIN IS BANGING ONE
>BROTHER CHAPLAIN TELLS ME TO SPY ON 40kchan TO MAYBE FIND SIGNS OF CORRUPTION
>MFW I KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO BE A RAVEN GUARD
>MFW I FIND THIS THREAD
>MFW I FEEL THE RED THIRST
>MFW I WISH I WAS KILLING ORKS BACK ON ARMAGEDDON
>MFW A WARP SPIDER STARTS HITTING ON ME
>can'ttelliftrapornot.jpg
>BROTHER CAPTAIN JUST TURNED UP
>MFW I CANT CARRY OUT THE EMPERORS FURY ON THE XENO
>WHAT TO DO?

>>51001546
Sell the ship and the eldar on it to a rouge trader

39 posters 171 posts at the time before I posted this. Methinks there be some same fagging about.

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>>50991202
While you faggots worship C'tan ,I just yesterday used one to wipe out one of your Space Marine Chapter companies. Stay inferior organic cucks.

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>>50998338
Oooh,another Necron Lord. How`s your Tomb World holding up against all these gay inferior races that are shitting our Galaxy up nowadays,senpai?

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>>50997937
You don`t need her affections. Take it from someone who`s had some experience interacting with Eldar women. 65 million years ago

>>51001622
>>51001671
>>51001702
Same necronfag go back to sleep grandad

>>50991289

Okay I'll be blunt here the greater good accepts all but I'm not having a "BACK THE FUCK OFF!?" piss stain gue'la on my ship

Shas'Vre, airlock him

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>>51001720
Fuck off you autistic child. You do realize that if you piss me off enough I`ll go and ask those faggots on Thanatos to pay special attention to your world?

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>>50990364
I`m currently laughing at your 8000-year old "civilization" tbqh.

>>51001784
Do it faggot, i bet living metal feels really nice when im skull fucking your corpse. Necrons aint nothing but overgloryfied metal cunts

>>51001904
>what is a Celestial Orrery
>what is your sun exploding out of nowhere
Stay mad organicfag.

>>51001987
Still trying stay relevant eh?
>im scary guys, i have doomsday devices guys, i really do

Funny you talk about your tech like its hot shit but i have never saw it when i fought you metalfags. Just a bunch of slow cunts, you make a dreadnought without legs seem like an eldar, i can literaly out walk you

>>50997937
Eh, just go for it. Take it from a guy who deals with Eldar on a regular basis - she WILL get what she wants. It's just a matter of how long she'll have to wait until she can go in for the (metaphorical) kill.

Plus, Eldar sex is some of the best sex you'll ever get

>>50998665

Watch the skies. Out of the corner or your eyes, mind. Don't look up. Don't ever look up.

>>50999281
Keh.Khhehehehehehe. Oh, man, why are you talking to the voices in your head again? Do you think this is going to be real, unlike all those countless times? Do you even exist?

>>51001737
>Shas'Vre, airlock him

>Shas. Not Kor. On a tau spaceship.

Get lost, pretendfag.

>>50998665
As of right now, don't ever go anywhere alone under any circumstances. Especially if going alone means going outside. I mean, unless having torture-sex and having your soul sacrificed to Slaanesh sounds like a good time to you.

By the good graces of air, you live to see these threads once in a good year.

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>>51002043
Have you ever seen a Canoptek Wraith you daft cunt?

>>51001549
Do what our chapter master did when a xeno started hitting on him; distract them with your astartes issue manliness, then get your brothers to steal everything not nailed down and get the fuck off planet.
Our company Venerable dreadnought tells us that Vindicare assassins can accomplish this distraction task as well. Fuck knows how he found that one out.

On top of the Eldar gear, we got a bitching Daemonhammer out of the deal, too. Inquisitor couldn't stop laughing when we told him, so we thought "well, why not?"

>>51002233
Oh no a oversized robo bug, what should i ever dooo? Maybe this melta gun could help me, oh would you look at that it fucking did, please metalfags your faces are going to get rusted if you keep on crying

>>51002260
What will happen if you shoot your sorry excuse for a beamer at it is that it will pass straight through. Then it will proceed to vivisect you to death. What are you anyways,faggot? Some Eldar pretending to be cool on 40kchan?

>>51002253
Wait you're one of those bloody magpies, i fucking hate you guys, you tried stealing commander dantes axe once

>>51002275
Im a mother fucking cadian born human, i live where shit hits the fan, do you think some tincan with alzimers and a lazer display scares me? Go back to sucking the c'tans dick fag

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>>51002302
Lel, just for you I`ll make my C'tan shard suck your soul out of your urethra,my senpai.

>>51002285
It was a generous gift.
He seemed happy with the replacement we gave him.

>>50991037
-AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING!-
-A couple of battleships are on their way too, and moreover the Black Templars had agreed to deploy a couple of strike cruisers!-
-We didn't even discuss the ETA!-
-My fucking battleship is still in the warp-
-I'm surprised Captain Varolus didn't shit himself for being the first to come out of the warp-

>>51002315
I have deamonets trying to suck my soul everyday, ill shove that shard upp your old frigid metal cunt

>>51002326
TEH CODEX ASTARTES NAMES TIS MANEUVAH STEEHL AXE!

>>51002165

>using Kor to enforce shipboard security
>with their atrophied muscles and skeletal structure

No u

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>>51002351
>implying Chaos Gods have anything on Necrons
>implying I can`t kill your whole regiment with my bare hands
Stay delusional,my child.

>>50990364
Worked out for my Ol' Man. Instead of dying on some battlefield he works as a watchman for an outlying settlement on Elsy'eir.

I signed up with an auxiliary Cadre as soon as I could.

Should be rotating back for R&R in a few cycles too. It'll be nice to see the family again.

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>>51002702
>>51002315
>>51002275
>>51002233
>>51001987
Reminder that behind every shitpost is a suicidal Necron crying for help. Will you not give them the Emperor's mercy?

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>>50990364
Oh, and i just upgrade your Riptides

Pretty fancy, aye?

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>>50990364
>Leave one puny boss for other puny boss
>Still not da biggest
>Still not da strongest
>Still not made for fightin' an winnin'

Krump yerself git.

>>51002702
I eat necrons for lunch, one day the imperium will clean all you metalfags of the galaxy like all other xeno fags

>>51002691

Kors crew the fleet, and the castes don't mix. Tau muscle and skeletal structure doesn't matter much anyway when the Earth caste makes combat suits.

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>Be Cult Mechanicus
>Have the worst technology in the setting by far
>Be a bunch of faggots who fight amongst each other constantly
>Be too incompetent to find more STCs
>Worship a C'tan they call the Omnissiah
>Look down on other Xenos who ironically all have better tech than them
>Secretly masturbate to Necron technology while hating them at the same time, out of sheer jealousy

Is there anything more pathetic than these guys?

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>>51005390
>Be Necron
>Have a Miniscule population
>Be forever alone because you turned all your subjects into mindless drones for the sake of being a dick
>Never get anything done because you're too lazy
>Can't even settle differences with other Necrons because you're too damn lazy to leave your house
>Have Robotic Alzheimers so you can't remember shit
>Be stuck in an existence of eternal, unfeeling, torment as a robot
>Hate all organics while secretly wishing you were still able to masturbate to them

>Be Tau
>small insignificant race of Xenos
>Be part in rigid Caste system where your job is determined from birth
>Can't stop preaching About the "Greater Good" for five seconds or the Auns will cut your dick/clit off
>Use shoddy, one and done, tech that can't even last beyond a 1000 years with a heavy overhaul
>too weak to actually build your own Empire, so you have to seduce other races to do it for you
>because Most of the popular media is based on Imperium, including the currently Top rated vox program, "AGP: Dark Heresy", which is actually based on the adventures of Imperial Guardsmen, everyone is secretly a self-hating weeaboo with an interspecies fetish
>spend all free time shitposting in Broken-ass Low Gothic on /xno/ on great the Tau Empire is and how all guardsman should defect and find themselves a secret Tau waifu/husbando

>Be any kind of Eldar
>Do I even need to go on?

Evidently, many things there are.

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>>50990364
Hey friend. You shouldn't join the tau, they're filthy xenos, wouldn't you rather join the forces of Chaos Undivided instead? That'll show the false emperor who's boss. while you're at it, you should buy my book as well. The Book Of Lorgar, in fact, if you join Chaos AND buy my book, I'll throw in a warp spawn free of charge.

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>>51006021
01100110 01110101 01100011 01101011 00100000 01101111 01100110 01100110 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110010 01100111 01100001 01110010 00100000 01101110 01101111 00100000 01101111 01101110 01100101 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 01110011 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01100010 01101111 01101111 01101011

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>>51006021
We didn't buy into your shit 10,000 years ago Aurelian, we aren't gonna do it now.

>>51006134
Well maybe if you brought my book you wouldn't be fucking dead, Jago

>>50994643

>See Tau labor camps of castrated "Individual thinkers"

You're confusing gue'vesa with marines.

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>>51005918
>be human
>be small insignificant blob of flesh
>be dependent on an insane religion for all your tech
>while you`re dependant also have inferior tech still
>die by the millions every day
>worship a corpse that doesn`t even want to be worshipped
>tell everyone you`re better than them while you suck

>be me
>be Necron Overlord
>in my society only the best get to retain their ability to make decisions
>have wonderous tech
>only worship myself
>none of us ever die
>shit on every race in terms of warfare.

You organicfags are really retarded.

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>>51007450
And yet, even with all of that, The Average human still lives a more successful, driven, and engaging life than any Necron, even when they were alive, ever has. Humans, though short lived, have rich and rewarding lives with a place in the afterlife granted to us by the god emperor. Necrons spend millions of years being Turbo-Neets doing nothing but sleeping and shitposting on 40kchan, while their brain and memory rots away into nothing.

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>>51007814
Ok let me adress your "points" one by one you fucking organic nigger.
Point 1:The Average human still lives a more successful, driven, and engaging life than any Necron
Counting Warriors and Immortals as true Necrons would be kind of like counting your servitors as human. And the other Necrons live much better than any of you faggots ever will.
Point 2:Humans, though short lived, have rich and rewarding lives with a place in the afterlife granted to us by the god emperor
I can only laugh at you you dumb delusions about your pet corpse caring about you.
Point 3:ecrons spend millions of years being Turbo-Neets doing nothing but sleeping and shitposting on 40kchan, while their brain and memory rots away into nothing
While we slept we didn`t really do anything at all,just rested and waited for the Galaxy to be healthy again as to claim it for the one master race. And I`m only posting on 40kchan to make fun of all the inferior races while plotting my new conquest.

UPDATE: I am currently on T'ros, I am living in an apartment. I will join the gue'vesa. I shall take more worlds from your precious imperium.

>>50992167
Those are shoes, which i had to borrow after my escape attempt due to them being destroyed.

>>51005390
>>51005918
>>51006021
>>51006082
01000010 01000101 01000101 01010000 00100001
01000010 01000101 01000101 01010000

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>>51007983
>B-b-but the Mindless Necrons don't count!
I wasn't even considering them, but tto be honest I don't even need to. Your Existence is a shell of what life is supposed to be, just sitting at home doing nothing and being bitter and whiny about your inability to feel.

>The God-Emperor doesn't care, you're wrong!
This "point" isn't even worthy of a refutation, but in Societies that actually function, the leaders aren't all petty, childish, faggots that take out all their frustrations on everyone around them because they're too impotent to solve their own problems. That's why all us "meatbag" races were able to build actual empires by ourselves, while you had to become the C'tans bitch to actually have any relevancy

>O-our lifestyles aren't pathetic! It's all part of our long strategy! J-j-just as planned guys!
The so-called technologically superior "Master Race"'s plan involved getting your asses kicked by then Eldar and then hidding until all the scary meat bags went away? Wow, truly a great example of Necron might and tactical genius. Go back to /r90k/ you eternal loser.

>>51008437
>At least I am not a half robot metal freak who talks in binary.

>>51008481
01000110 01101100 01100101 01110011 01101000 01100010 01100001 01100111 01110011 00100000 01100111 01100101 01110100 00100000 01101111 01110101 01110100 00100001 00100000 01010010 01000101 01000101 01000101 01000101 01000101 01000101 01000101 01000101 01000101 01000101 01000101 00100001

>>51002285
It wasn't the axe they wanted to steal, but the commander himself.

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Ya call dis foightin? Use ya gunz not ya words!

>>51008539
Uze ya' 'ead ya stupid grot! Bullets 'n choppas cahn't go throo com-pew-tah skreens ya git, dat jus' breaks it!

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>>51008587

>>50995375
++++How did that go? Sorry if I couldn't help, I've been shot to frak. I've earned twelve hours of repairs, having held the line almost alone with that strange plasma pistol. The assault itself took ten hours.++++

>>51008539
>>51008539You cant shoot through the internet.

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>>51008467
You do realize that I can still personally,with my fucking personal army,that really is just me mind you and carve this bloody swathe into your sorry excuse for a disfunctional society`s territory. By practically myself. That`s how advanced our technology is you worthless exponent. And to be quite honest every Eldar I`ve seen shit themselves and run when they see me,then I kill them. The Necrons are no pushover and you do know it. You fear us just as much. Your insolence and stupidity has doomed countless lives. Feel proud.

>>51008828
00111110 01101001 01101101 01110000 01101100 01111001 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01101001 01101101 01110000 01101100 01101001 01100011 01100001 01110100 01101001 01101111 01101110 01110011

>>51008828
EAT PLASMA FAGGOT :) Seriously, you got your asses handed to you by the eldar.

>>51008921
01011001 01101111 01110101 00100111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01101110 01101111 00100000 01100010 01100101 01110100 01110100 01100101 01110010 00101110 00100000 01010111 01101000 01100101 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01001001 01101101 01110000 01100101 01110010 01101001 01110101 01101101 00100000 01110010 01101111 01101100 01101100 01110011 00100000 01101111 01110110 01100101 01110010 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00101100 00100000 01001001 00100111 01101100 01101100 00100000 01100010 01100101 00100000 01110011 01110101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00101110 00100000 01001101 01111001 00100000 01100011 01111001 01100010 01100101 01110010 01100100 01101111 01101110 01100111 00100000 01100001 01100011 01101000 01100101 01110011 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01110100 01110010 01100001 01101001 01110100 01101111 01110010 01101111 01110101 01110011 00100000 01100010 01101111 01101001 01110000 01110101 01100011 01100011 01111001 00101110

Hey, anyone knows where to find a Rogue Trader in the Segmentum Obscurus? I got a whole bunch of Eldar tech and Eldar to sell. Also do you think the Adeptus Mechanicus would want an Eldar Craftworld, i also have a stc fragment if it help.

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>>51008961

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Post your face when tau killed chaos champion and they thought they killed a chaos god

>>51009103
01010100 01110010 01111001 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110010 01100100 01100101 01110010 00100000 01101110 01100101 01100011 01110010 01101111 01101110 01100110 01100001 01100111 00101110 00100000

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Rolled 14 (1d100)

Oh Lordy Lord on Sweet Terra, what do we have here?

>>51009183
Ahh, If it ain't ted. Hows life?

>>51007450
He clearly had the high ground!

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>>51009231
Ya know how it is. Once your above a Corporal, life becomes a series of unfortunate events with interruptions of war. But hey. Voxtech's are the God-Emperor's own ears, if not his voice.

>>51009329
Defected to the tau, currently on t'ros (or taros). So nice here, but it is too damn hot sometimes. There are no commissars to shoot you, as the tau are more humane to their soldiers.

(P.S. there is a new thread already started)

>>51008828
>What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Skitarii warriors, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Necron Tombworlds, and I have over 3000 confirmed kills (no, not "little baby crons teleporting away, I mean fucking kills, destroyed totally). I am trained in machine warfare and I’m the top Phosphor sniper in the entire Mechanicus armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another filthy xenos. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before In this Galaxy, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the Galaxy and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my mechandrites. Not only am I extensively trained in multi-armed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Adeptus Mechanicus and I will use it to its full extent to blow your miserable metal ass out of the Galaxy, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have turned off your speaker. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

>>51009428
lol

>>51009428
>kiddo
I`m 65 million years old faggot. Also I see how much time and effort you put into your little post. It made me kek in my emotionless robotic voice.

>>51008828
>I have no actual counter-arguements, so now all I can do is just put on my internet tough guy persona and hope I scare him away.

>>51009525
>65 million years old
>baaawwwing on a Kroot knitting website like a child when called out on being a disappoint to his ancestors with no life
Lel.

>Also I see how much time and effort you put into your little post.
Nigga that took less than 2 minutes to type up. Unlike you, I'm not an Archiac wreck that takes 300 years to walk to the bathroom and back.

>>51009538
My main counter argument as of now is that Necrons are simply so technologically advanced compared to you that one single person or at least our civilization`s equivalent of one,this being me one Necron Lord with a bunch of mindless Necrons serving under me can go and destroy so much infrastructure of yours that it`s not even funny. Also while I`m at it I`ll add how all your arguments about "functional civilizations" and things like that you forget to remember that yours isn`t one. And that you were babysat through it by the Emperor. Also going to gently imply how your Omnissiah`s a C'tan. I also have a C'tan...shard. As a weapon. Consider this for a second. My people can destroy and shackle to our will that which you call a god.

>>51009716
>my ancestors
It`s almost as if Necrons don`t reproduce. Your entire argument has been discarded. I`m beyond ancestors.

>>50990364
I was just thinking the morning that a huge hold back to the Tau is no faster than light travel.

But Tau have Gue'vesa, many loyal and honest to the cause. Do the Tau not get any human Psykers?

I assume they know what Astropaths and Navigators are having captured a few Imperial fleets. Any real reason they couldn't start producing their own Loyal Gue'vesa version?

Hey guys any of you ever heard about the four armed emperor? It's a pretty cool local flavor of emperor worship around here, taking about how the emperor had four gifts for humanity, and we refused them, stunning, but he forgives us.

Y'all should come to a church meeting if you're in the area.

no shame in this please, but I originally joined up to meet women ( they're so hot and I don't know why), but after settling down with a few kids, I discovered I really enjoyed it!

>>51009893
Is your mind so far gone that you can't remember a time when you weren't a robotic abomination, or are you just pretending that it doesn't exist?

>>51009997
I`ve done more great deeds than all of my organic predecessors taken together. So I don`t feel like I`m shaming anybody.

>>51009979
Not any psyker can be a Navigator - it's a very specific mutant strain found only in Navigators, and it can only be passed on by breeding with another Navigator. They're incredibly well-guarded and would likely kill themselves or evacuate their ships before being captured if the Tau ever do get their hands on an Imperial ship.

>>51009806
>I can control a thousand RC drones, obviously that must mean I'm a genius.
>Implying that the Imperium of Mankind, and Empire that has withstood war on every front, even inside of it occasionally, for 10,000 years, is les functional than Necron society, which couldn't be arsed to actually have to do things so you just brainwiped all the non-nobles and went to sleep.
Top Kek Also

>Believing that the Omnisiah is a C'tan
Maybe you should try getting your information from sources other than cheap, ten credit, pulp fiction holoslates.

>>51010145
>Imperium of Mankind, and Empire that has withstood war on every front, even inside of it occasionally, for 10,000 years
Compared to the Necrontyr Dynasties which waged a million year-long galactic war with a vastly superior species and also won,you`re nothing,off yourself.
>getting your information from sources other than cheap, ten credit, pulp fiction holoslates
I know where each C'tan that we didn`t make into Shards is,seeing as my fucking species created the bodies that make them the C'tan to begin with. I know it`s hard to face,but the "Omnissiah" is in fact Mag'ladroth the Void Dragon. This fact of the universe is common knowledge among all Necrons,tbqh.

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>>51010231
>Compared to the Necrontyr Dynasties which waged a million year-long galactic war with a vastly superior species and also won,you`re nothing,off yourself.
>Necrons
>Won
You pussies retreated once your little space Gods decided that it wasn't worth it anymore, and hid inside of your tomb worlds. Demons were the ones who finished the Space Pepes, stop trying to take credit for shit you didn't and couldn't do.

>>51010403
We dominated and destroyed all of the inferior races and in the horrid wake of what we had done decided to give them some time to recover. Poor Szarekh even went into exile because we killed so much shit in shame for how brutal and relentlessly brutal we were. Also if you`re Eldar...why do you always shit yourselves and run away when faced with my or any mighty Necron host? Is it because your Old One daddies are all dead by our hand?

>>51010403
>>51010467
01001000 01110101 01110011 01101000 00101100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100010 01101111 01110100 01101000 00100000 01100110 01100001 01100111 01100111 01101111 01110100 01110011 00101110

>>51004293
'dis

>>51008539
'dis

>>51009979
Tau do have FTL travel, It is just slow;like at star trek level.

>>51005390
GET OUT MEATBAG, 10111011201111REEEEEEEEEE

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>>50990364
>Admitting to being a race traitor
Enjoy being sent to fight Kriegers in the exact same equipment you defected in while the Tau watch from six miles away.

But don't worry, when Gustav and Karl are breaking all of your fingers before impaling you on a spike, at least you'll be able to say "I betrayed my race and my people for no reason."

>>51010996
>implying Kriegers have names

>>51010979
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>>51010996
Enjoy being ripped to shreds by rail guns, or being blown to bits by whirlwind missiles. Also, dont forget having your charred face being torn in half by a pulse rifle.

>>51010979
>trinary
disgusting

>>51010996
Are you also implying that kriegers have names, they don't; why? I fought beside some, their devotion literally scares me!

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>>51010467
>tfw too intelligent to win

>>50991105
>blindingly fast
>even faster than the imperium's rate of advancement
Kind of contradictory, ain't it?

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*BLAM* Ok you heretical spineless sacks of imperium flavored shit. get back to your posts or else Unit moral will have to improve further

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>>51010467
At long last, the Sentinels of Xeti have allowed us to achieve contact with those from beyond our world!

Who dares besmirch the names of the Old Ones and tempt Sotek's wrath upon them with their shitposting?!

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>>50998015
Somebody skipped leg day. You should pray to the Emperor if you want to make some sick gains, kid.

>>51011174
10001110101
Periodic table with the centerpiece of mind

>>51014283
01000111 01100101 01110100 00100000

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>>51011501
Enjoy being used as cannon fodder with the Kroot, just because the Tau are too pathetically weak to get into melee.

>>51014168
>implying we`re scared of you
>implying we won`t just kill you again

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>>51005021

Ah yes, of course. There are no ships in our fleet that house more than one cas-

oh

oooooh

>>51018936
Aaaaaaaand that's why my good friend Aun'el ditched that the "Greater Good" and joined up with the boss. At least when you're working for a Rogue Trader, they're HONEST about who's on top.

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>mfw stuck in the wrong universe with a xeno loving commander.
>mfw pride of the human fleet crawling with xenos
>mfw whined at for accidentally revealing my power level


How do i get one of those warp storms you keep talking about, i feel like defecting.

So... I am fucked.
I just killed a greater champion of chaos with some floating chaos artifact telling me to use it.
Now it won't leave my side because it feels I am a magnet for trouble and it wants to train me against that kind of trouble.
When I told it about the emperor, it just sneered and said it was just another chaos god that demands its disdain and hatred.
Told me to not approach inquisitors, telling me they would kill me and "sacrifice me to the dark gods in the name of the "holy" emperor for some trivial glory.".
It told me not approach any astartes, because I am not strong enough to kill a million with my bare hands for breakfast in case they deem me damgerous.
It told me not to approach my tribesmen because fear leads to hatred and hatred leads to self defense and self defense in needless murder.
It told me not to approach tau because they are not pure, said the same for eldar.
So far, I am capable of lifting a bane blade with my hands but it tells me it is lightweight.
Now it teaches me how to write and use my spirit to renew my body.
It gets out sometimes and brings me big felled game and tells me to eat big to get big.
Whenever I asked it why it wants me to get stronger, it says that I must learn to live unchained by any rules and chaos for the coming end.
What end is it talking about?

>>51019281
Do not believe its lies. It implies that our end is near, and so you must serve it. What it does not tell you, however, is that the foul thing wants you to be a part in the machinations of chaos. Please, you could still be saved. You could destroy it, but it has the chance of liberating the daemon inside, which is bad.

>>50998338
Isn't organic slime what you aspire to be?

That's your whole shtick. You're trying to get back your biological lives before your degenerating machine code drives you all bugfuck insane or plunges you into senility.

I guess it's too late for you.

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>>51010467
>Also if you`re Eldar...why do you always shit yourselves and run away when faced with my or any mighty Necron host?

This coming from the species that the Eldar beat so badly they had to retreat into suspended animation tombs.