You've been asked to contribute a single line to the Great

Talk to your GM. Communication is key, and before taking any other action or jumping to any assumptions, just talk to them and try to work it out. So many problems can be solved before they happen by just talking things through.

>>50347605
The answer to all your problems lies in superior firepower.

>>50347605
Don't base your character on whatever flavour of the month media you're into currently - if nothing goes wrong you'll be keeping them for months or years

>>50347605
Never disarm what you can bypass.

>>50347605
Running away is always an option.

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>>50347605

>>50347605
Only use tactical nuclear strikes when you're sure you're the only one in range who can tank it.

>>50347670
Definitely this.

Play something you know you won't be bored with in a years time.

If a player is always wanting to make a new character then find out why they're disinterested in the first place.

Remember, it's only a game.

>>50347605
When you make a character, give them a motivation to actually cooperate with the other pc's and play the game.

>>50347605
The easy way is always mined.
Start a mine collection.

>>50347605
If you think it's a good idea, it probably isn't.

>>50347605
Don't be a dick.

Swallow your ego and go with the flow. Nothing worthwhile ever came from an argument during a game.

Always come to the table more curious than prepared.

Always geek the mage first.

Let your plans be dark and impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.

Kill with a borrowed knife.

Exchange the roles of Host and Guest.

>>50347605

Violence is ALWAYS an option... but there is always a better way.

>>50348272

That doesn't work for players, who have to tell the GM the details of all their plans.

Good advice for a GM, tho.

A battle is a mean to an end, not an end on itself.

>>50348349

Yeah. Feeling the need to hide your plans from the GM is a sign of problems in the group.

A good GM will work with the players plans to make things interesting and fun.

I have played with shitty GMs before who made it seem like you should hide stuff from them, as they'd never work with players, using any information they had to screw them over regardless of how little sense it might make IC.

Loot a burning house. In the midst of chaos, there is also opportunity.

>>50348352

Well, depends on the context. In a Wuxia game, a good battle is its own reward.

I never role play faster than I can see, other than that it's all in the reflexes.

3.PF monks are OP

Watch out the roof and the floor!

>>50347605
Tortilla chips are better than wotsits.

Always ignore the little girl.

>>50347605
>What do you add?
DICKS

>>50348944
holy shit this, always this, the little girl is always a fucking trap and in both measure

>>50348452
You joke, but I knew experienced players who were convinced of that.
One of them always plays wizard. Always the same build.

Rape is always an option

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>>50347981
Ooh nice

Dont be late if you are late bring pizza

>>50347605
Assuming all the basic stuff is there, I'd add

"If you're playing a wizard, get a wizard hat. If you're playing a fighter, get a viking helmet. If you're playing a healer, get checked for STIs"

>>50347605
If it's a woman...ALWAYS SEDUCE.

>>50347605
A reference joke or concept is only good if it also works in the event that somebody doesn't get the reference.

Never inject your fetishes into the game.

>>50349206
*Feel free to use the fetishes already in the game

Beware of women...for they come from hell!

If you're in a party, let others shine too

>>50347605
_

Dont split the party.

>>50349307
That's not bad, but still, not as good as

|

In your games, you do not have to limit your characters to the outdated real-world notions of gender roles and sexual expression.

:^)

Never leave your room without:
A slashing weapon.
A piercing weapon.
A blunt weapon.
A cold iron weapon.
A silver weapon.
And a magic weapon.

>>50349386
You only need the magic weapon, and blunt weapons can always be improvised

>>50347605
The runes of virtue

I II
II I_

>>50349415
>fighting a beholder's werewolf minions while under his anti-magic gaze

Enjoy wishing you had held onto that silver mace.

Bring a six pack or a bag of chips or something. I'm tired of my snacks running out every week just because I'm running the game.

If they detect you alone as a rogue or equivalent, RUN. Do not fight. Use caltrops, smoke or wthever and rejoin the part or escape.

Bring a 10 foot stick to touch things with you.

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>>50347605
Any of the usual lines that I'd tell every player in my group.
>Don't make a "quiet loner" character who doesn't like working with people. Because by the very nature of the game we're playing you're gonna have to work with people. Most prominently the other player characters who probably have no interest in dealing with that shit.

>Give your character some kind of motivation or end goal. Doesn't matter what it is. If its getting a fat load of cash find a reason why your character is so desperate to hoard money as to potentially risk their lives adventuring for it.

>The primary goal of a backstory, if you even want to bother writing one, is explaining how you acquired the few skills that you have. Avoid writing a novel and save your ideas for the actual game.

>Violence and sexuality is fine as long as it stays within the limits of good taste. You're not stupid children so don't behave like ones.

Plot the death of the DMPC.

>>50347605
Never let the Rogue out of sight

>>50347605
Craft (alchemy) solves all problems.

A +1 buff on five different people is better than a +5 buff on one person.

Anything can be a combat skill if you're creative or desperate enough.

Generally speaking, one cast of speak with dead is more reliable than a torture session, not to mention easier. It also keeps the lawful good types off your back. If your enemies hear that you torture prisoners for information, it might make it harder to take them alive.

The local religious leader is always more powerful (and helpful) than the local king, especially if they think you're trying to convert.

If the local religious leader IS the local king, he's the bad guy. No exceptions.

The more skill checks a plan requires to succeed, the less likely it is to succeed.

Your night watch is only as good as their search skill.

Traps are not a substitute for sentries. Not everything screams when it loses a leg, or even particularly minds losing one of its twenty legs.

Always keep your prisoners fully bound, gagged, and hog-tied. If anything goes wrong, you can coup de grace them and escape, and it makes it easier to stash them in a barrel in your cart when moving through town.

Never rely on a single knowledge check if you can get away with more, do multiple overlapping checks to work around potential bad rolls. Never depend on one person for all your knowledge checks either, encourage your party to have multiple redundant knowledge skills with each other to maximize information. This helps immensely when, say, trying to instigate a succession war by feeding a local rebel group information about military supply lines while the next-in-line for the throne is returning from a successful war campaign and his brother is getting drunk at the local bar.

A donkey, a cart, and a bunch of crates will let you carry a weeks worth of food up to the dungeon and every scrap of treasure back out. Make sure there's nothing valuable in the cart when you aren't around.

Kilroy was here

>>50347605
1. Cloaks and booze are standard adventuring equipment, if nothing else, you can use them to make impromptu molotovs.

>>50350533
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6y4XYxhA-o

>>50347605

Don't be a twat.

Don't backstab your party.

Always roll openly.

Dead parents are the best parents.

Be polite, be professional, and have a plan to kill everybody you meet.

Make the rogue go first.

>>50347605
don't be a cunt
Less meme worhty: It is common for new players and a times veteran players to use their skills as a effectively as they could, always try to see how far you push the use of your skills and be thinking where else your skills could apply.

>>50347605
If your group focuses on roleplay, don't build a character that is only good in combat. Likewise, don't write a five page backstory for a group of rollplayers.

>>50347605
"Dont be a cunt all you're life"

i.e. let characters develop over time, especially ones who dont fit the group in their current state

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>>50351397
>Don't be a cunt all you are life

Bring a loaded dice for fun.

>>50347605

You are not your character, but you are responsible for your character.

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>>50347605
Take down names and relations. Helps you, the players, and even the GM when someone of negligence might turn valuable later.

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>>50347605
Killing the wrong people can land you into trouble. Killing more usually fixes this.

>>50347605
The best characters aren't designed in a vacuum. Talk to your group throughout the process to create inter-PC relations and a more coherent group overall.

Around blacks, never relax
Around elves, watch yourselves.

>>50347605
If you're gaming at your place, supply ice and non-alcoholic drinks.
If you aren't, supply or chip in for everything else.

>>50347605
>Another ribbonfag thread
Always shit

Always masturbate before going to a session, even if you don't feel the need at that moment.

Taking the spotlight is fine. Hogging the spotlight is not.

>>50347605
Liches are known for their awesome martial might, so be sure to forgo magical defenses and focus on the physical.

Make sure to immediately target other players for a slight that your character would not know about IC. Home in on them like a guided missile for no actual reason, they'll love it.

>>50352317
but anon, jerking off only makes me hornier.

>>50352189
I don't know. From what I've seen, they actually tend to be some of the better threads on this board, if you mean the threads with Ribbon as the OP.

Ignore everything /tg/ says.

>>50352588
Breathe regularly

>>50352588

Don't cheat.

>>50347670
>>50347757
>>50347769
I'm the guy that likes switching all the time, how do you guys avoid getting bored with a character?

>>50352630
Low expectations.
Incredibly low expectations.

>>50352630
I find that if I make a gimmick character or someone with no room to grow, I get bored quickly. Similarly, if i make a character that doesn't really have a lot of depth I get bored quickly. Don't mistake that for backstory seoth however, as that's also a recipe for beind disatisifed with how the plot fits with your character. My favorite characters are the ones where they have a fairly normal backstory but where I put a ton of work into their personality, how they would react to certain situations, etc. And then you bite your gm's hooks.

>>50347605
People never take anyone's advice and only become better through pain and effort.

>>50352630
You don't know the character fully after you made them. You give them blank spots to fill in and room to grow as the adventure goes.

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If you're bored, make bold moves and take the riskier path. Playing it safe might move the story along faster, but the stories players talk about for years are those made by epic moments (even those ending in cataclysmic failure :P)

>>50347605
>The flavor text is irrelevant/meaningless, all that matters are the game mechanics. Run the numbers so you have a sense of the game's balance and can tell if an option is good or shitty.

>>50349582
I agree with all your points.
As a secondary dm trying to become a player I'm having issues creating a character with long term potential and believable motivation. This is especially an issue because I need to create a character with experience, because the party is already level 10.
I'm trying not to overlap with any of the players and will most likely need to play a fighter or barbarian type.

>>50347605
Build something useful. You don't have to BE useful all the time.

>>50347981
I like this one. New players might not understand it, even veterans might not appreciate it, but it's damn good advice.

If you cannot open a door via lockpicking, try simply using the handle. Barring that, brute force always works eventually.

>>50347605

This is your story. All of you at the table, no exception.

>>50347605
You have choices other than D&D. Pick them once in a while.

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>>50347605
Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfils the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.

Sometimes people forget that I don't want to make fun of them/insult them. I am their game pal and want to have a good time with them.

>>50347749
Or better yet, don't be in range.

>>50347605
Don't make your character "better" version of you. Avoid Mary Sue type of characters. Create something interesting, even if not very unique and learn to roleplay them - it will be far more interesting to see their successes and failures befitting their character.

>>50347605
>exploding runes

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"Ribbon is the only elf worth saving"

>>50347605
Bros b4 hoes

Behind the unmentioned door may be a whole new world, but don't be upset when it never seems to be.

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Give your character a clear-cut motivation.

>>50347605
Bring snacks and/or booze.

>>50351247
Didn't Batman once go back in time to the night his parents died, and then let his parents die in order to ensure that he became Batman?

>>50347605
Few people are actually worth giving second chance, but you should still err on the side of caution. Nobody is worth giving the third.

I'd have to say
Different players have different likes, understand that, don't bitch about the guy roleplaying his paladin wanting to give the NPC a decent burrial if he didn't bitch about your minmaxed "chaotic neutral means i can do whatever i want" powermuchkin and don't punch the mayor just because the night has been roleplay heavy and you want a combat.
At the same time know that the game is not your personal one-man show because you have the highest charisma check and don't expect the other players to sit around while you and the DM recite half of the silmarillion to each other.

>>50347605
Reward unorthodox planning and let your players sequence break.

>>50349162
You been in the service, anon? You're not late if you bring food.

>>50347605
Don't be a faggot, unless the aim of the game is be a faggot, in which case be an enormous faggot.

>>50347605
The goal of the game is to have fun, so consider and encourage it in your group's activities.

>>50347605
Not every scenario needs to end in the possibility of torture.

>>50347605
Roll with it. Almost literally. Randomization is good and healthy.

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When in combat, never fight fair; use every dirty trick in the book to stack the odds in your favor. Honor doesn't mean jack for the dead, and your characters don't want to end up dead. And if things go South, bail out and try a different angle, make sure your escape has a nasty trick or two to discourage pursuit. On that subject, always have an escape plan/route in mind if things go wrong.

>>50347605
Keep it stupidly simple

>>50347605
Shoot straight, conserve ammo, and never deal with dragons.

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When designing a character, start with what they adventure for and their relation to their party. THEN pick the class, etc. This will help ensure you don't make something you'll grow bored of in like two sessions.

>>50347605
bring rope

>>50347974
this

>>50347605
You're playing a game. The purpose of games is having fun. I know in english sometimes is hard to tell, but you in this case is plural.

The best way to play is to maximize the fun of others.

>>50347605
Don't be a dick.

>>50347605
If two players, or the GM and a player are in a RL relationship, just leave now.

They always SAY they won't be biased, but they can never live up to it.

Bring your own flavor to the table, yet be a team player.

Always roll sense motive.

>>50361867
This. I used to invite my gf to play with us until the team bard did exactly as bards do and propositioned her character. You keep telling yourself it's gonna be fine and then BAM: you're rping a cuck.
Relationships become needless drama 100% of the time.

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>>50353681
>I'm having issues creating a character with long term potential and believable motivation.
Please allow me to shill the Complete Book of Villains.
It is the best characterization tool I've ever seen.
It doesn't matter what system you use or if you're making a hero or villain.
It could be used to craft multiple pages detailing a single villain or to randomly roll up dozens of single line character ideas.

>>50361970
>bard did exactly as bards do
I'm really tired of the "bards are sluts XD" meme.

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>>50347974

>>50349307
>>50349361
Guys, guys. We can compromise. If we use both of your alloted lines, we can get this beauty:

+

Keep an adventure log. It might not help your experience at first, but after enough campaigns, the details become fuzzy. It can be nice to read over all the old, forgotten details of your escapades.

Never make a deal with fey!

Charisma and social skills are not bloody mind control.

BE ON TIME

Nothing pisses off a gm more than preparing a game and having everything all set up for 2 pm on sunday only to be forced to wait because some asshole arrives at 230

T. Gm who currently has this issue

When the offer does arise, do have sex with the GM while he talks to you with his BBEG voice

>>50362237
Bards are well-traveled musicians with fancy cantrips. What kind of person studies abroad without fucking foreign whores? Even The Protomen get laid after their performances. That plus magical bar tricks? They're literally built for parties. You can make a less sexualized bard but the fact stands that they're generally perverts.

>>50363089
>What kind of person studies abroad without fucking foreign whores?
>they're generally perverts.

According to who? "Generally" seems to be just your way of saying "According to myself."

Bards can range from your Rock Star parodies to disciplined court musicians to celibate temple players, and the whole "he's playing a bard, that must mean he needs to try and fuck everyone" meme was stripped of any remaining humor it had long ago.

>>50363446
>according to you
>yet it's a common enough view to be a meme
Nobody's trying to be funny. It's just what people expect of talented, highly social young men. Stop fooling yourself into thinking something is wrong because it's overused.

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>>50363720
What about talented, highly social old men?

>>50347670
>Tfw I've been playing a character lightly based off of guts for the past 3 years

He's just a strong dude who uses over sized weapons he has a very opposite story and personality than guts which I'm pretty glad for considering the circumstances Guts has gone through.

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>>50347605
A game is meant to be fun for everyone involved. If you can only have fun by robbing others of their fun, then it's time for a different hobby.

>>50363720
You're still trying to force your own perspective onto a world that's a lot broader than you seem to give it credit for. Just about every adventurer is talented, and not every bard is social.

It's largely just the way people try to take advantage of the wealth of slut and promiscuity jokes, and repurpose them for D&D by just repainting them by putting "bard" in the punchline, because as far as people like you care, they just checked which class had high charisma.

You take it to a level beyond "Bards are charismatic swashbucklers" though, and lead it right beyond "Oh, he's flirtatious" straight into "he needs to bone anything that walks."

It's less that it's overused, and more that it's just used poorly.

>>50363780
That's just what the young ones eventually become.

>>50363879
>not every bard is social
Bullshit

>You take it to a level beyond...
Hey I agree it's a lame character design, but it's the only one anyone has ever used. Personally I hate the stereotype but it's what is expected at this point. If you want to fight it, start sharing enjoyable bard builds or something instead of getting mad when people point out the common idea of what a bard is. Had I not said "exactly as bards do" in my original post, someone would've said something like "DUDE YOU SHOULD'VE KNOWN THAT'D HAPPEN XD".

It's not me you need to convince, it's the rest of the tabletop community.

>>50364053
> but it's the only one anyone has ever used. Personally I hate the stereotype but it's what is expected at this point.

What is wrong with you.
You are so brain addled, that you don't even realize that the "smarmy bard" hardly makes up the majority of the characters that serve that role, and that's still a step below your "every bard acts like a modern rock star" that you seem to hold close to your heart.

And, that hypothetical "someone" who would have said that lame thing? That's as lame as you sounded, and you somehow think you're better than that.

It's a bad joke, and for someone who agrees that it's stupid, I'm surprised you'd go so far as to say it's the "only one anyone has ever used."

Even taken as hyperbole you still sound ridiculous.

>>50347605
Elves actually do like it up em

Every party needs a generic straight man

>>50347605
Interesting characters aren't interesting because of the way they are made or their backstory they are interesting because you play them in an interesting way.

>>50364128
Have you maybe considered that I wasn't the one that designed my friend's bard? Maybe it's possible that I don't play with the same community you do? We don't all get to be in tabletop heaven where bards aren't shit, you raving autist. Literally all anyone on /tg/ posts about are the pervert bards. Where are the clever swashbucklers? Where are the street performers? Where are the wizened hobos? Not in this tabletop board and, possibly by extension, not in my shitty gaming group. So congratulations you have someone who plays them right but most of us don't.
>hurr bhur its a meme but most people dont follow it i swear

>>50347605
Never ever lick a lizardman.

>>50364205
Look, I understand you're stupid, but don't go out of your way to show HOW stupid you are.

>Maybe it's possible that I don't play with the same community you do?

Which is why I'm not making baseless claims like all bards are sluts, and then acting like that claim needs to be defended when it's clear it's just something from your personal experience, if even that.

> Literally all anyone on /tg/ posts about are the pervert bards

Don't misuse "literally". And, don't judge /tg/ by its worst members.

>Not in this tabletop board and, possibly by extension, not in my shitty gaming group. So congratulations you have someone who plays them right but most of us don't.

You might be able to see more if you dug your head out of your ass, and stopped trying to establish a few bad examples as "most." It's like you spend most of your time in those cringefest "That Guy" threads and allowed them to color how you think most people play.

Thus spoke Lotus: Never get on the boat.

>>50364312
You're just flinging shit at this point. How unexpected.
I started out with an exaggeration and you went
>WAAH WHEN WILL DIS MEME END? >=(
What am I supposed to say in response to that? Also how can you insist it's just something from my personal experience and at the same time argue it's a fucking meme?
>Don't misuse "literally".
I'm sure from time to time someone shares a nice bard build somewhere, but as far as I can tell it's mostly the one personality. Literally is the wrong word, I guess, but it's nearly true. You're only disagreeing because you want to pretend I'm being ridiculous.
I know the stereotype makes you mad but there's no need to throw a fit.

>>50364312
Here's the part where you link to one properly designed bard and jerk yourself off about how you won some sort of Internet fight.

>>50349055
I've been in a group like that, the entire group, after I showed that (even with my above average stats) my to Hit, damage per hit, DPR, AC, HPs, Relevant Saves were worse than the Fighter, Paladin, Barbarian and Ranger they just moved the goalpost with "b-but in high levels SR also you're always armored and armed". After I proved that the SR was shit (the rogue had a 13 SR armor and was being hit everyfucking time) they kicked me.

So you know, it seems to be if you suck at everything even with high stats as long as you're considered armed and armored you're OP...but druids are ok.

People are cunts.

Yes all of them.

>>50364407
You started off with a dumb exaggeration, and were called out on it. You could have just gone ahead and agreed that it's a dumb meme and moved on without replying, but instead you've spent a fair amount of time trying to somehow defend it.

"As far as you can tell", just means you have very limited experience, especially when you use that in conjunction with "it's nearly true", when the promiscuous bard is largely only to be found in bad parodies and comedies. While you might have a shitty group who does dumb things, including yourself considering you willingly confined yourself to wearing horns, it's one thing to say "my idiot group does this" and another to try and paint the entire roleplaying community with your "we take the worst memes and pretend that's the only way to play" style.

You can't even argue your point without rushing headlong into exaggeration and hyperbole, so is it any wonder that you need some shit thrown at you?

Here's one more for the road, you idiot.

>>50364613
What, so I'm supposed to take some single anonymous shitter's view that there were at some point plenty of good bard posts here and agree despite never seeing anything to verify it, and on top of that I'm expected to already know you, a complete stranger, have a good bard or two in your group? Go fuck yourself. Stupid or not, the idea that all bards are perverts is unfortunately deeply rooted into the tabletop community and all you've had to say in defense so far is "nuh uh!"
I have a pretty decent amount of experience playing here in Bumblefuck, Nowhere and I've been around here long enough to have come to the conclusion that only perverts and "haha just for laughs :)" types seem to care about bards. I'm sure it's different where you are but you can't argue that that's because I'm inexperienced.

Also if you have to fling shit to get your views through, maybe you're just pissed off in general. No need to take it out on /tg/.

>>50347605
Don't play D&D

>>50364717
You are still basically just trying to present your idiot view as all-encompassing, and I am telling you, right now, that you are a moron for even suggesting that "all bards are perverts XD" is anything more than a tired meme, a meme that you seem keen on perpetuating, largely just because you seem to be willfully blind to any contradicting evidence to the ideas you seem so firmly attached to.

If you are sure it's different where I am, than that already dismisses your ideas since you're hoping to present a wide view. You're not expected to already know anything, which is why I'm telling you right now that your Bumblefuck views are limited in scope and hardly represent that of the larger gaming community. It's like you think that bards "being perverted is deeply rooted" because books like the Book of Erotic Fantasy exists, when that is a book used by an incredibly small minority of players, and ultimately represents a tiny subcommunity within the larger one. You really need to stop looking at extremes and treating them as common fare.

There's no denying that the "bards are all sluts xd" is a meme, but it's nowhere near as true or even as popular as you might perceive it to be. Even on /tg/, it's usually just a bad joke, an exaggeration of bards. You, however, seem to have absolutely no concept of moderation, judging by how quickly you rush to hyperbole, which is why your world view doesn't even accept the idea that people don't often play bards like they were written by hentai artists.

And, enough of your "U MAD?". You're an idiot, and I'm really wondering why you keep returning for another round of "This is why you're stupid" when all you end up doing is providing more ammunition for explaining how you like to do nothing but exaggerate, based largely on your incredibly limited experience and willful ignorance, and then get upset when someone calls you out on doing so.

>>50364944
>You are still basically just trying to present your idiot view as all-encompassing
You are still trying to convince me that because you've had a better experience, that somehow /tg/ doesn't currently have a "bard is in chastity belt how to fuck girls?" thread right fucking now. All you're doing is saying "nah ur dumb" and counting it in your shitty little brain as evidence against my claims.

>Your Bumblefuck views are limited in scope
Gee, it's almost like I said that already. I'm not trying to argue I know everything about every community, but the fact stands that the community I have to play in acts just like /tg/ at its worst, and /tg/ is at its worst more often than not.
>...which is why your world view doesn't even accept the idea that people don't often play bards like they were written by hentai artists.
For the third or fourth time now I'm sure they don't where you're from but all many people will ever see are pervert bards. It isn't even that big of a problem, you're just unreasonably strongly opinionated on the subject.
You're not proving shit wrong, you're just calling me an idiot and patting your back about how you're some sort of tabletop cosmopolitan. And stop bitching about me exaggerating. You're doing the exact same thing every time you say I'm an idiot for disagreeing with the size of a meme. Really that's all this is at this point: we disagree on the severity of a fucking meme. This shit-flinging contest might never end.

>>50365121
>>50364944
Can you guys just stop

>>50365228
>>50364944
Here, you know what? We're going nowhere with this. I don't want to fling shit for the natural lifespan of a /tg/ thread, especially with someone who has valid points. Let's start over again without the shit-flinging.
I agree bards are capable of much more but where I'm from they don't get proper usage. While I'm willing to admit my perception is skewed, I'm still unsure that perverted bards are less common than even swashbucklers. Is there some specific type of thread I should keep an eye on for decent bards?

>>50365121
Bad Examples =/= all examples.

I'm not just saying you're dumb, I'm saying how you're dumb. You focus on the extremes, and somehow manage to ignore everything else. Day to day discussion of bards largely revolves around stuff like what are good instruments/spells to pick, which of the 5e colleges is best, the kind of stuff that seems to evade your notice and experience. You have a narrow focus and limited view, and that's more than enough to call you stupid.

I'm calling you stupid because you've taken a meme to heart, and you can't see anything beyond it.

What I'm arguing is simple. It's a stupid, unfunny meme, and you seem to enjoy exaggerating it to the point where you went out and said that it's the only way people play bards.

This could have ended long ago, but you seem convinced that a meme that's as bad as the joke about Paladin's always falling is "quite nearly the truth." I'm sure your DM also ends every session by having rocks fall and kill you.

>>50365260
You're right, we've done enough shitflinging. In fact, I'll even go so far as to apologize, because my major grievances were against your excessively strong choices in wording.

Really, I don't even know where to start recommending threads to keep an eye out for, since decent bard threads really aren't all that rare. Even just popping into the 5e general yields good discussion about them from time to time, and I'd be willing to guess that the Pathfinder General would as well if they could stop talking about their kitsune waifus.

>>50365282
I'm serious, not trying to be the bigger man or whatever, just trying to defuse the needless tension so I can actually get information and learn something out of this.
What threads are people talking about bards in? I'm not big on bards personally so I don't often search for them but the few times I have clicked on bard threads they were absolutely packed with sex jokes whether or not they made up the majority of the actual players with real questions. Maybe it was just bad luck, who knows? Is there somewhere else you go to discuss bards outside of /tg/? The d&d subreddit is as bad as us but I know there are tons of forums out there.
I'll admit you almost certainly have more experience on bards than I do but it's really hard to want to listen to someone when they're insulting you.

>>50365344
Thanks. Sorry about how I reacted as well. I hate getting in these kinds of arguments.
I think I filtered the word "general" ages ago when it became clear they just wanted to talk about sexy kobolds. I'll have to be a bit more specific about the filters I use from now on.
Anyway thanks for broadening my horizons on the class. I'll try to give bards another look, and maybe I'll even run a few - I can't expect change in my group to happen without some sort of input.

>The first two characters to ensure you have in a party are tank and caster

>>50347605
Don't throw melee weapons

File: 1468697370177.gif (347KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

347KB, 500x375px

>>50347605
Sometimes it's ok to cut a deal with a dragon.

>>50357846
It's almost always doughnuts for the navy. I eat more doughnuts in a month than your stereotypical fat cops thanks to Virginia traffic.

>>50362296
>the one time something positive came out of /tg/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzpndHtdl9A

>>50347605
Don't build an entire, convoluted concept of a character. Build the scaffolding and support beams for a full personality, and let him or her be shaped by the party he will spend his days with, and the challenges he will face.
It is tedious to play with someone who only truly enjoys those moment where the GM caters specifically to his concept and background. Try to be a three-dimensional person in a three-dimensional environment. Remember that backstory can be both straightjacket and springboard.

Don't put it in your mouth!

>>50366619
underrated post.

>>50366619
You cheeky fagmaster. I applaud you.

If you bring your stupid fetish into my OSR game, I will slap your shit so hard that you will have to reopen your Maple Story account in order to wail about the assfuckening you duly received, to people on your mental level.

>>50347605
Shut the fuck up and listen.

Don't fuck with the DM, because they can make your time as fun or as fucking tedious as they want

>>50347605
Puto el que lo lea.

>>50347605
Know
Your
Group
And
Adjust
ACCORDINGLY!

>>50347605
Never make a single character you envision doing things past the immediate next session. Always live in the present. Your next session could, and statistically is more likely to be than not, be your last.

>>50347605
If you don't wanna play, quit, don't coldcall everyone, have some dignity.

Baby carrots are the ideal snack food.

Never give the GM ideas.

>>50347605
Do not lick the bloody tree.

>>50347605
The most important thing is to have fun and get along with your fellow players/gm.

>>50349332

That was mine as well

Do NOT SPLIT THE PARTY

Don't try to role-play a character that's smarter than you are.

>>50347605
Just do it already.

>>50347605

Understand that you can fix a broken item or bone, but also understand that you can't fix stupid.

>>50347605
Collaborate with each other. At its core, PnP games are cooperative story telling; never forget that.

>>50347605
Ignore all the bullshit in this book.

>>50347605
No gaming is better than bad gaming. At least with no gaming you can go find something else to do.

>>50349167
I know it's a joke but

> be wizard

> wear a big honking "cap me first" cone on your head

Dress like you think a rogue would. Or a commoner. Even better a fighter, if you can get away with it.

>>50351821
excellent
advice

>>50353408
ew

>>50347605
Pillage, then burn.

>>50379628
The hat is mostly so your own allies can track your position better.

There's few things worse than being in a chaotic ambush, cutting your way through six guys, only to find out your wizard is being murdered on the opposite end of the cavern.

>>50364152
good advice

Don't stop at looting everything that isn't bolted down. Bring a wrench.

>>50347605
Never trust an elf.

Don't browse /tg/.

Optimism is cowardice. Always ask yourself "what if the plan doesn't work, or something we rely upon breaks?" Then plan for that. If your plan includes "and hope they miss ALOT [and ALOT is underlined three times]" as one of its steps, it is a BAD PLAN AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD! Do not rely on luck or the dice, stack the odds in your favour.

Never trouble trouble until trouble troubles you. Make sure the enemy wastes their first strike, so you can finish the fight they started immediately. Until that first strike, simply prepare and wait for the idiots to try something first.

The most memorable characters have nothing to do with how unique they look or how powerful they are. The most memorable characters are forged through interaction and experience.

Drive is the greatest combat skill.

>>50383978
dont just take stuff off the floor either tapestrys are worth a lot of money

Hey man. You know that guy? Don't be that guy.

>>50384820
MY MAN

Free unblockable eighteen dice of pain train, and fuck no you don't get your defense against it nerd, it's going 90 miles an hour!

Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks.