>In the last chamber of the dungeon, your party discovers

>wear it on my butt

>wear it on my butt

>wash the buttstains off it and wear it on my butt

>>50209623
>wear it on my crotch

>>50209936
Indirect buttzecks

>>50209623

Cool. I burn it.

Don't give me that look. I have been saying for WEEKS that my character has had bad experiences with magic because of the cult that took over his city and killed his family using dark powers. He barely tolerates getting healed up by the cleric.

Its a strange artifact on an altar in a monster infested dungeon.

So he's burning it.

>>50209889
>>50209904
>>50209919
>never seen Jackie Chan adventures and doesn't understand the dangers of butt mask

Neat, loot.

>Stick it in my bag of holding and let it sit there for months after forgetting about it, selling it to a random shop in the middle of bumfuck nowhere when I finally remember I have it.

>>50209623
Cast identify object

>>50210076
Is the shop owned by an oddly happy and solicitous proprietor?

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>>50210040
Mah nigga.

Smash it and smash the pieces it breaks into

>>50209623
Ask the wizard to ID it, then wear it on my face.

I always wanted my character being the token extra-race character to cause conflict, but he's too nice. He IS stupid though.

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>>50209623
Wow, nice Jojo reference!

>>50210076
>One week later, reports that an out-of-the-way village burning down in it's entirety for mysterious reasons can be heard in major cities
>Two weeks later, strange activity in the night sky around the moon

My warlock would probably walk up to it, attempt to analyze it 3 times. If I detect the spooky shit in it, it burns. If not, I put it on while the rest of the party screams "NO!"

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>>50210329
God I fucking love this meme.

>>50209623
>Identify
>Mordenkainen's disjunction
>Leave

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>>50209623
great! it will look good with my other one at this weeks all hallows eve party

DISINTEGRATE!
GUST OF WIND!

>"What do you mean, 'nothing happens'? You never even rolled a save! The player's guide says, on..."

>>50209623
>best Zelda game

Mah nigga.

Actually, my character encountered a similar situation in Werewolf, and it's one of those times where I was like "I know this will be a stupid decision, but putting metagaming aside, it's exactly what my character would do, so..." We come across this obviously Wyrm-tainted artifact lying in the middle of a burnt-out portion of grassland. Party tries everything they can to examine it without touching it, look at it closely, roll skills, use gifts, throw things at it, etc. Eventually, my character (who has both the Impatient flaw and the Overconfident flaw and only a single dot in INT) decides "Eh, fuck it, what's the worst that could happen" and grabs it. It is now permanently bonded to me and we are on a quests to travel the world looking for a Were- who might know what it is and how to remove it. Also it keeps whispering bad things at me.

So yeah, he'd probably go "Hey, sweet mask!" and immediately put it on.

>>50209623
You've met with a terrible fate, haven't you?

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>>50209623
I give it to the vampire loli.
Nothing can go wrong!

OH GODS EVERYTHING HAS GONE WRONG