>The God of Destruction appears in your setting and says he'll

>>49994950
i provide him with a mcchicken, which is, to me, the best sandwich

>>49994950
I have 15 ranks in Profession (Chef) and a magic item that let's me choose the result of a d20 once per day.

Let's cook.

>>49994950
Challenge him to a cookoff.

>>49994950
Well, no character I've ever built could fight him, but one of them did grow up in a tavern/inn and is a decent enough cook, so...

I'm going to not answer this question, since we're playing Exalted and I think it would just be unfair to you OP.

>>49994983
What is the greatest feat of cookery your character accomplished so far?

>>49994983
Nah, he's used to that level of stuff.

https://youtu.be/AcM23mcYO-o

Get him to come to sigil, laugh as he's rendered powerless or as the Lady of Pain does her thing.

>>49995032
Considering the power DBZ gods show...it would be an interesting thing to witness.

>>49995032
I don't think he'd fall for that. You don't become a God of Destruction by being stupid.

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Fight him, if there's one thing that MKX has taught me, it's that not even an Eldar God is immune to the Ball punch

>>49995049

...have you met Beerus? Dude is an impulsive idiot. It's a good thing Whis is around to grab him by the ear every now and then.

>>49995176
Yeah, but he's still afraid of the Omni King , who is basically DBs version of the Lady of Pain.

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>>49994950

>>49994950
He's a cat so just give him a big pile of prawns. Cats love prawns.

Then he'll go to sleep.

>>49994950
He is super easily impressed with food.

>>49994950
Unzip my pants and tell him I've got something more delicious than he's ever tasted before.

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>>49994950
I agree to fight him, expecting a difficult but normal-violence fight, and of course, instead it turns out to be some kind of martial-arts-cooking competition, which I have to practice for for a week before the fight. I then learn he's cheating-to boot, and I find a way to win, regardless.

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>>49995927
>"Really? I was expecting something a little more... substantial."

Without breaking eye contact I raise the comm to my mouth and instruct the man on the other side to fire for effect on my current location.

>>49994950
I tell him to get the fuck out and he leaves.
I'm the forever gm.

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>>49996000

>>49994950
>Exalted
>Perfect Unsoakable Attack
>Perfect Unsoakable Attack
>Stunt like a motherfucker
>More Perfect Unsoakable Attacks

>>49996102
>Not Being an Infernal
>Not having Experimental Acceleration Mastery so you can "craft" things XEssence faster
>Not having 5-Dots in Craft Water
>Not Making an Artifact 4, or 5 if you have the essence, meal in a single day

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>>49994950
Tell him there's four chucklefucks hiding in a separate dimension reality who think they're better than him.
Or shoot the shit out of him because he's a goddamn triple heresy.

Drug him with catnip?
If he destroys Earth, he won't be able to get that buzz ever again.

>>49996116

But then I'd be playing the Exaltation designed literally to be edgier than literal edgelords.

Why in fucks name would I ever want to do that.

>>49996212
>Being a Saturday Morning Cartoon Villain and reveling in it
>Being Hammy as fuck
>Edgy
The First Chapter of the Infernals Book never happened.

>>49996212
Why are you confusing Abyssals with Infernals?

Infernals are the Exaltations designed by edgelords so incompetant literally the only Infernals supplement in existence is all about how the Exalts will inevitably evolve into sentient power metal albums.

>>49996102
>Abrasion of Brass and Fire
>Kneel or Be Knelt

I mean realistically unless you're E10 Beerus' raw speed and power are going to mote tap your ass, but that combined with Final Viridescence is going to give him a big surprise followed by the worst day of his life.

Solars and Siddies are probably better for perfect attacks, though. Infernals have very few of those.

>>49996241
>Using a charm with the Imperfection of the Demon City
>When Beerus is gonna fight you in a wasteland, or in space

>>49996241
Pretty sure there are two Infernals Supplements.
Return of the Scarlet Empress
And Broken Winged Crane.
BWC is the good one

>>49994950
>How do you react?
I write him out of my setting.
Anime shit has nothing to do here.

>>49996317
This is an anime website and this is a board with multiple "weeb" games

So your default answer is "I suck his penis and beg for forgiveness"

>>49996317
What is a god of destruction to a god of creation?

>>49996360
I think you missunderstood me. When I said anime has nothing to do here I meant in my setting, not on this board.

>>49994950
We lace a BLT with LSD and Cocaine. Or the current setting equivalent.

>>49996363
Two sides of the same coin. One can't exist without the other.

>>49996360
Overreact much?

Also, what's with this unhealthy obsession with public faggotry you're showing?

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>>49996360

I want to see your dick, post it faggot.

>>49996241
>Solars and Siddies are probably better for perfect attacks, though. Infernals have very few of those.
Solars and Sids on high-essence shit from supplemets can one-hit-kill anything that isn't playing by Exalted rules.

Solars: first, active a turn-long Perfect Dodge just to shrug off whatever they have. Then, Perfect Attack with Literally Infinte Damage.

Sids with SMA reflect the enemy's first attack upon itself and then counter-hit with PA to turn them into a duck.

>>49994950
i start preparing a feast that will take forty billion years to complete, arabian nights style

>>49994950
>TFW Halfling Rogue with ranks in Profession: Chef whose goal is to raise enough money to open an Inn and Restaraunt that caters to planar travellers

FINALLY, THE ARC THATS RELEVANT TO MY CHARACTER IS HERE. THANKS DM!

>>49994950
Take him to some restaurant and have them serve whatever. When he complains, I retort that he just doesn't get it.

>>49996671
So you're going to start by carefully arranging clouds of gas and dust in space so that they eventually form a start system upon the planets of which the most delicious things are going to evlve?

>>49994950
Let's go to McDonald's, motherfucker

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>>49994950
well I think we'll need to get these guys out of retirement;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1TdA_yP8sV8

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>>49994950
>Or he's provided with food more delicious than anything he's tasted before.
He thinks cup ramen is a delicacy, how hard could it possibly be? Humans must be the best chefs in the fucking multiverse by design.

>>49996802
Actually apparently we are.

>>49996559
Which Solar charms have infinite damage anyway? The only sources of infinite damage I remember in Exalted come from superweapons not charms

>>49996273
Amusingly, Cecelyne's otherwise shitty PDs suddenly become OP in settings where attacks that can't strike dematerialised beings or Essence ratings don't exist. Granted Beerus probably does have the former given what he did to that one kai but for the purposes of sparring he doesn't seem to use them.

>>49994950
Beerus is literally just an ordinary cat with god powers. Give any cat powers and they'll most likely act like Beerus.

>>49996839
I don't recall the name, but it's really "assign any number to your damage, however high you want".

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>>49996842
If I remember correctly, according to some interview Toriyama actually based Beerus on his cat (or the cat of a friend, not too sure. A real cat though).

>>49994950
Dwarves.
Bring Bugman's, call Gotrek, make god fuck off, world dies anyways ;(

>>49994950
Give him baclava and espresso, this shit is the bees knees

>>49995199
Rightfully so. Zen-Oh (Omni-king) destroyed 6 universes instantly in a fit one day.

>>49996519
Why should a god of creation not be able to exist without a god of destruction?

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>>49996861

>>49996363
God of destruction serves as the janitor basically. Creator goes off creating bunch new life, and does their best to make everything perfect. Eventually it gets old and needs to be recycled. Yet its the God of Creation's baby, trying to destroy a planet/system/galaxy would bring back fond memories. That's where the God of Destruction comes in.

They're uninterested in the stories, and just see it as yet another mess to clean up. They go in clean things up, recycle the materials used which the God of Creation uses to make something new.

>>49997218
Hollistic "creation and destruction" mumbo-jumbo.
I guess you should say that without destruction, everything would exist and it would exist forever. This could lead to living paradoxes like square circles existing which would fuck the natural order up something fierce, creating the neccessity for destruction.

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>>49994950
Ok

>>49994950
Considering my character has no idea if he's legit, he agrees to a gentlemanly duel and is instantly curbstomped because his dbz power level is probably going to be like... twenty or something.

The remaining party then starts trying to work out a way to cook for him.

>>49996317
Another inspiring post, thank you for your valuable and thought-provoking contribution to this thread.

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>>49996317
>Anime shit has nothing to do with my TTRPG which in its core books includes East Asian style Shaolin monks that can run alongside walls, throw devastating punches that only kill the target a minute after impact, can use the anime cliché rapid healing factor and can talk to animals

>>49997476
>talk to animals

So Dr. Doolittle is an anime now?

>>49997476
>anime cliché rapid healing factor
Wolverine is anime
confirmed

>>49994950
I offer him a chip butty laced with way too much catnip.

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>>49994950
I ask him if he prefers a cultural dish, or a more traditional one, I'm no chef, but I'm far from my homeland, and maybe he can will into existence the spices I need.

>>49994950
Hope he likes coconut cream pie.
In his face.
HONK

Have the mind mage implant a memory of having just finished the most delicious meal he can conceive of.

>>49997476

>Shaolin and druids
>Anime

Shut up faggot.

>>49997476
Those came from Kung-fu movies and comic books before they were in anime you uncultured knobgobbler.

>>49997666
fuck off satanic homeshit

>>49997476
>East Asian
>Half the fucking continent
>Shaolin monks
>Anime shit
>what
Anon that's like saying western culture since the dawn of history is derived entirely from capeshit

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>>49994950
Cringe that someone in my group would be autistic enough to bring in a character from an incredibly overrated series into a setting that likely wouldn't suit it.

Seriously, I enjoy Dragon Ball/Z/Super, probably more than most, but it really isn't THAT good.

>>49998727
>assuming homoshit instead of SS13
Call security, I've found the traitor.

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>>49998727
Wrong HONK, anon.
I've never even encountered homecuck outside of the odd porn pic.

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>>49998727

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Somehow I think a Malifaux gunslinger, even if skilled and magically talented, is going to match him in a fight.

Oh the other hand:

>Ex-Geisha with large ranks in cooking and fantastic charm (The stat it's based on)

She might manage the second one, if he doesn't think human food is too bland after whatever alien race food he normally eats.

>>49999219

*I don't think

That ended up completely changed in context by missing a word.

>>49994950
>Or he's provided with food more delicious than anything he's tasted before
My character starts laughing maniacally.

She has been preparing for this day.

>>49994983

then replace god of destruction with any deathlord who, for some reason, will be sated with pudding.

>>49999479
>deathNep
Creation's laziest deathlord.

>>49999219

There we go, Culinary trigger.

Rams - Loosen Your Belts: After succeeding, if you are preparing food or drink, anyone partaking of the food or drink gains the following Condition until the end of the day: "Stuffed: The character that applied this Condition gains a + on Bewitch and Convince Duels made against this character.

There is a trigger for 'This food is so good you like me more'

>>49998023
Your mage is strong enough to mind control a God?

>>49994950
I present him with a knuckle sandwich.

>>50000703
But is it a genuine Ankh-Morpork knuckle sandwich?

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>>49998791
>but it really isn't THAT good.
It isn't good period. Super is the laziest excuse for an anime I've ever seen, and let's not forget the downright character assassination it commits. It's like it was written by an intern who only heard of DBZ because his little brother watches it all the time.

>>49994950
I call the cops.

>>49994950
I can easily hit above a 60 in craft expression, which is the skill that covers all "art" type stuff.

I can cook him something amazing and hope.

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>>49994950
Bacon.Fired.Rice. with cashews and my own secret weapon

>>49996802
Yeah, I like that Toriyama finally gave humans something to be good at other than getting knocked up by Saiyans. I especially like that he made it something humorous like cooking. Apparently even our shittiest food is better than the best stuff in other universes.

>Travel back in time to the moment he came into existence
>Prepare a meal for him
>Return to present

>>50004233
I hesitate to say it but humanity aren't bad fighters either. Got some good qualities, and hell; the Ginyu Force were highly respected and feared fighters on a galactic level.
It's just the show kept fucking going up to the reality-warping level and left humans behind.

Way I figure it humanity's going to take the milky way in the end with their robots and ki techniques and stuff. I mean, we got time/reality travel what more do you want.

>>49994950
I tell him to come back when he's not a shit character.

>>50004466

recoome wasn't a human. he was whatever that big forehead nigga in star wars was

>>49994950
Kill the tech-savvy Ewok and cook it on my Shield Gauntlet.

The God of "Destruction" has been in his lunar cuckshed for 5,000 years, why should I take him seriously now?

>>49994950
EAT THIS YOU BURN VICTIM LOOKIN MOTHERFUCKER
>unzips dick

>>50004466
Krillin is the most powerful human to ever live. So strong he knocked up an android.

I prepare the last line of defense.

Meatbread is our only hope.

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>>49994950
I take him out for some good ol' 'go 'za!

>>49995042
The Lady of Pain doesn't have stats. Beerus does. That's like the world's strongest man trying to suplex a black hole.

I make him a nice meal as contender for best he's tasted. It's poisoned.

>>50006674
>Kill the Ewok
This has never not been a good idea, anon.
t. an assassin droid who "slept" in a crate lined with ewok fur.
Shit's hella easy on the finish.

>>50003650
>and let's not forget the downright character assassination it commits
Whuh?

>>49996716
I'm making a pie from scratch, how else do you make it?

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>>50007523
This is what happens when you let the Centauri cook.

I have a joke character in my setting that would just will him out of existence for a little while.

She calls it a 'timeout'.

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>>49994950
I make him a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster:

Take the juice from one bottle of Ol' Janx Spirit.
Pour into it one measure of water from the seas of Santraginus V — Oh, that Santraginean seawater! Oh, those Santraginean fish!
Allow three cubes of Arcturan Mega-gin to melt into the mixture (it must be properly iced or the benzene is lost).
Allow four litres of Fallian marsh gas to bubble through it, in memory of all those happy hikers who have died of pleasure in the Marshes of Fallia.
Over the back of a silver spoon float a measure of Qualactin Hypermint extract, redolent of all the heady odours of the dark Qualactin Zones, subtle, sweet and mystic.
Drop in the tooth of an Algolian Suntiger. Watch it dissolve, spreading the fires of the Algolian Suns deep into the heart of the drink.
Sprinkle Zamphuor.
Add an olive.

>>50007686
The Absolue Madman!

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>>49994950
Is there a even character that’s close to being as perfect as Cell? Let alone be him. And I'm not talking about Perfect Cell. I'm not talking about Super Perfect either. Hell, I'm not even talking about SSGSS Golden Cell. I’m also not talking about SSGSS Golden Cell who fused with 9001 SSGSS Golden Cell Jrs & obtained Beerus & Whis' DNA. I'm definitely NOT Talking about SSGSS Golden Cell who fused with 9001 SSGSS Golden Cell Jrs & obtained Beerus, Whis, Champa & Vados' DNA after absorbing enough Spiral Power & Getter Rays to use SSGSS Golden Tengen Toppa Getter Emperor. I'm talking about SSGSS Golden Cell who fused with an infinite number of SSGSS Golden Cell Jrs & obtained Beerus, Whis, Champam, Vados, Madara Uchiha & Ultimate Kars' DNA to obtain Requiem versions of every Stand (including but not limited to Gold Experience Requiem, Made in Heaven Requiem, The World Over Heaven Requiem & D4C Requiem) after absorbing enough Spiral Power & Getter Rays to use SSGSS Golden Tengen Toppa Getter Emperor as he pilots Elder Demonbane with Cosmic Armor, Power Cosmic, and Omega effect while he does 101 Push-ups, 101 Sit-ups, 101 Squats, 11 km run per day for over 4 months inside the sun after ingesting Kryptonian DNA (to somehow obtain infinite power from a finite source) after consuming Popeye's Spinach while riding the writer's cock to battle.

>>49997509
>Marvel Mangaverse
Seems like it, m8.

Considering we have reason to want the plane we're on obliterated, I suppose I'd ask him if he'll die if we don't feed him, comment on him being a big guy and ask about the next step of his master plan.

Either someone back on prime will res me or I get my eternal reward. Either's good.

>>50008409
Nope

https://youtu.be/nn6WT3n3wSI

>>49994950
Either the resident god of war sons him to battle or the god of death gets sick of that shit and permabans him from this continuum.

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>>49994950
>Roll profession (cook) untrained.

>>50007332
Krillin is hands down my favorite character when he's not being a scared bitch. When he's busy pissing himself in fear then he's still my favorite because that's an entirely reasonable reaction to someone who is capable of exploding the earth and actually wants to do so.

>>50009116

I'd like Krillin more if he ever actually used the obvious Flare/Disc combo.

>>49995049
>wants someone to fight him and win
>tell him who can do that
if he doesn't take up the offer to go to sigil, he'd still probably count this setting as a winner

>>49994950
>ctrl-f disbelieve
>[not found]
I roll to disbelieve the illusion/bluff on the grounds that a god powerful enough to have sole responsibility for the destruction portfolio can spar with other gods and find a decent cook

>>50009184
>>50009260
Its more that he wants you to justify your continued existence. He's the God of Destruction so it's his divine duty to wreck stuff, but he's willing to spare things that either provide him a challenge or feed his ravenous appetite.

Telling him to go to Sigil, even if he does so will probably result in him saying "K" and blowing up your planet before he leaves.

>>50008409
Clearly you haven't read my fanfiction about Gohan still being relevant or you wouldn't ask such stupid questions

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*unsheathes katana*
heh... There's only room for one god of destruction in this world kiddo
*teleports behind him*

>Cast Wish
>Cast the Devilmite Beam on Supreme Kai
>One even almost negative thought causes his heart to explode
>he dies
>because he dies Beerus dies
>because Beerus dies then Whis dies
>No more problems

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>>50009545
>*teleports in front of you*
>hssssssp
>everything personnel adult

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>>50009578
Do you want Goku Black? Cause that's how you get Goku Black.

>>50009720
He's in a mortal body and doesn't immediately blow up the earth.

What exactly am I worried about here?

Double karate chop at my crotch and say "Eat my dick faggot."

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>>50009611
As shit as Super may be, that scene was so great. Not only was it well animated, but it's so great and memorable.

Have a superior WebM btw.

>>50009720
>>50009578
I never bothered watching Super. Why does killing Supreme Kai kill Beerus, and why is evil space clone Goku not just planet busting shit?

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>>50010259
>Why does killing Supreme Kai kill Beerus
We're simply told that killing the God of Creation kills the God of Destruction and vice versa. A bit like how in the original Dragonball killing Kami kills Piccolo and vice versa (but those were actually one person at some point. We're never explained how it works with the gods).

>and why is evil space clone Goku not just planet busting shit?
I guess because he values the world, just not the NINGEN that make it ugly. He and himself actually had a pretty sweet cabin in the woods.

>>50009731
Should probably be worried about him fusing with himself and becoming a literally immortal superpowered deity that gets stronger from being beat up and transcends time.

>>49994973
Tied with fillet o fish imo.

>>50010259
Same reason killing Piccolo killed Kami.

And Goku Black just wants to kill sentient beings. He actually wants to protect everything else so blowing up a planet is something he's not fond of doing. He'll do it if necessary but it's not something he really wants to do. He does plan to rule the universe afterwards so there's no reason to blow it up.

Also blowing up the Earth would make it harder to fight Goku. And he's got that saiyan blood pumping through his veins making him want to fight.

>>50010350
Was this guy an awesome fighter before doing the body swap? I can't help but remember Captain Ginyu using his body and only being able to use like 10% of its power since he didn't know any techniques

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>>50010390
>Was this guy an awesome fighter before doing the body swap?
Incredibly so. Even among the supreme kai's he was considered a prodigy.

>I can't help but remember Captain Ginyu using his body and only being able to use like 10% of its power since he didn't know any techniques
Vegeta actually brings that up at some point, claiming that only an idiot like Goku could use Goku's body to its full potential

>>50010390
Zamasu was a prodigy, yes. Quite easily the most powerful Kai ever seen and possibly the most skilled fighter yet seen.

>>50010390
Yes, but even he took awhile to figure out how to use Gokus' power. Goku
wrecked him the first time they fought.

Luckily he acquired the Zenkai ability from his Saiyan body so getting beaten made him stronger.

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>>49994950
I tell him the legend of the greatest food humanity has ever know, but explain to him that I would need his help to make it, as no mortal could collect the ingredients in one lifetime. From there I have him accompany me on a grand adventure, to collect the rarest ingredient from around the world. Herbs from the highest mountain, salt from the deepest sea, eggs of ferocious beasts, that sort of thing. As we travel I slowly build a bond with him, as adventurers do. Months later I make him what is essentially the world's most expensive bowl of ramen, and one for myself. For the greatest food in this world is the one you make and share together with a trusted friend.

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>>49995049
>Want to go the store for some chips.
>I am very, very stupid
>get lost on the way there
>keep accidentally fucking things up to an unbelievable degree wherever I go
>leave warpath of destruction behind me as I wander around trying to find my way to the store
>entire countries eventually left in ruin
>Become chosen by the gods to join their pantheon as the new god of destruction
>Sit in godly thrown room because I can't find the exit.
>Still never got my chips

Finally the DM fulfilled my food-themed campaign requests.

IRON CHEF, MOTHERFUCKER.

>>49996541
Those look like some well drawn dick sucking lips that I recognize.

That's the one about the slutty halfling and her domme slut of a mom, right?

>>50010599
>For the greatest food in this world is the one you make and share together with a trusted friend.
Nah fuck you the greatest food is KFC.

>>50010718
Like hell it is, Popeyes is way better

>>49994950
I stop time, teleport a stack with two million explosive runes under his fat faggot ass and detonate it from a distance.
I'm a level 20 wizard, gods are my playthings and should know their place.

>>50010678
Hahaha

This is the best.

>>50010927
You know that won't kill him, right? Or even hurt him, really.

>>50010932
>unavoidable damage

>>50010933
He can dish out and tank attacks that can destroy galaxies.
Two million explosive runes are unlikely to even bruise him.

>>50010939
>He can dish out and tank attacks that can destroy galaxies.
Since when did that show get so high?

>>50010948
Roshi destroyed a moon in DB, Vegeta and Frieza destroyed planets without much or any effort, Cell was strong enough to one-shot the solar system and Goku and Beerus' fight caused shockwaves that reverberated through reality itself, turned planets on the other side of the universe to dust and threatened to unmake the universe.

So, Buu saga probably.

>>49994950
Cast Gate, phone in the entire divine pantheon that need their worshipers to survive.

>>49994950
Easy enough. I've got a whole range of local recipes and treats that no one's ever had and always shock people as to how good they taste.

>>50010927
> Stop time
> Implying he wouldn't resist time altering effects

>>50011278
Yeah, doesn't Goku literally power through Hit's timestop until Hit somehow manages to stop time in stopped time?

>>50010903
Are you saying you'll take me out to eat at Popeyes to prove your opinion right?

You're a real pal.

>>50005318
I wasn't saying they were humans, but that humans can get to about their level.
Sorry, should have been more clear.

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>>50007523
>I make him a nice meal as contender for best he's tasted. It's poisoned,
That was literally how Beerus was introduced.

>>50011278
Worst case scenario Whis just rewinds time to prevent it from happening.

>>49994977
>a magic item that let's me choose the result of a d20 once per day.
That seems hella broken. My DM would never allow such a magic item even if the fantasy was so high we were going super saiyan.

>>50011522
I don't think Whis would be able to do that if Beerus was killed quickly enough. After all, his kind basically stop functioning if their assigned god dies.

>>50011586
But muh twelve million d6's.

>>49994950
He'd be very appropriate because my DM is a cheating fucking asshole.

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Change the channel.

>>50011340
Tien was capable of actually hurting semiperfect cell, even if he couldn't kill him. He could absolutely crush the ginyus. With the exception of saiyans, repeatedly-fused namekians, and whatever they're calling frieza's race these days, humans are the strongest race in the universe that we know of, and probably absolutely since anything stronger would have been killed or recruited by frieza.

>tfw you realise even yamcha could conquer a planet.

>>50011677
Even Yamcha could effortlessly annihilate a planet. Or single-handedly exterminate the pre-series Saiyan race with next to no effort.

>>50011709
I'm not sure Yamcha could. Tien's about the lowest I'm willing to go here.

>>50011677
>whatever they're calling frieza's race these days
I've heard "Changeling" bandied about quite frequently.

>>50011754
He's easily stronger than the Ginyus, any one of whom was far and away more powerful than any Saiyan prior to the series.
Also, he survived under 300x gravity long enough to turn the room off.

>>49994950
I throw a ball of yarn at the cat.

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>>50011860
"A God doesn't need to justify his actions to anyone"

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>>49994950
Offer him the sweetest of poisons, strong enough to give diabetes to a god ...

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>>50010707
>>49994950
YOMIGAERU AIYAN SHEFFU!

>>50004233
In a way, it's been foreshadowed since the earliest days of Dragonball.

>>49997218
All that Begins must End, and all that Lives must Die.

>>49994950
Play the best song in the world

>>49999219
>if he doesn't think human food is too bland after whatever alien race food he normally eats.
He fucking adores Human food actually. If Super is anything to go by Humans might just be the best cooks in the universe.

I'd honestly just serve him a good pizza.
You can never go wrong with pizza.

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>>50013177

>>50011529
Not really. I mean it's a free 20 and thus a free hit, potentially a crit once a day.

Remember that skill checks are impossible to critically succeed or fail at. A 20 on a skill check just adds 20 to your skill, same as a 1 adds 1.

>>50011677
>humans are the strongest race in the universe that we know of
Yes and No. Humans are shit-tier to begin with, a power level of 5 is "average" for Humans and considered weak for a species in the Galaxy. More than that a number of species have a more "natural" attunement to Ki, with even kid Saiyans being able to fly or fires off ki blasts, whereas Humans need to learn.
But Humans have TONS of potential if they bother to train themselves, way more than most species.

>>50013226
He ate 20ish boxes of it in one go, then asked for more.

>>50010298
As someone who is pretty annoyed by the horizontal power ups and the pacing of this arc:

I can only assume that Goku Black was taking his time until he hit his plateau with Trunks before just wrecking everything.
Also I assume they want the planet to live on after the mortals are all dead because animals and plants are okay in Zamasu land

>>50013311
They have technology. Androids, time travel, etc.

>>50011759
Arcosian is the fan majority accepted term for them.

Basically in a flashback somewhere the Saiyans are given technology by a hooded and horned race that isn't shown.

Pretty much accepted that this is the Frieza race.

King Cold probably trained in a black hole where his giant dick caught the Girl-Whis's attention and she gave birth to Frieza right there and then

>>50013437
Roughly equaling other species, with the exception of common Space Travel, except for a couple of Geniuses who make one-off projects
A one-off project rather than making them en-mass
See above, also other species have it but it's illegal.

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>>49994973

>>50013311
>>50011677

The problem with the idea of becoming a Super Saiyan is flawed by having it be a transformation that signifies that you've surpassed your limits and then tying it specifically to Saiyans.
I don't see a reason that a Human couldn't have an amazing reverse of power unleashed and brought forward in a similar manner.

The Z Humans were always really good at surpassing Goku with similar or even less training.
Goku undergoes 4 years of Kame training and comes out in the 350~450 range.
The humans all hit 1.2K
Goku goes through 3 months of King Kai training and comes out at 8k.
The humans become strong enough to easily beat the Ginyu force

None of them ever bother gravity training besides Yamcha who gets fucked.
Only Tien keeps up with his weird waterfall shit.

Also. Considering how the Blue form works. I don't see why any other Z character couldn't attempt or accomplish God Ki at least.

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Reminder of SSGSS Golden Cell.

>>50013531
I still think it's weird that the humans and Piccolo trained with King Kai and yet didn't pick up the Kaioken.

>>50013584
Only thing I can think of is if Goku or saiyans have some sort of innate resilience that the others dont.
Goku has a lot of stupid shit happen to him in dragon Ball where he tanks impossible falls and bullets with his head

Or maybe King Kai just liked Goku as his student or something retarded.

Oh well. They fucked explaining it just like they fucked kaioken out of the series

>>50013790
Namekians can regenerate though, if anything Piccolo's level of resilience would be even higher than Goku's.
But yeah, Toriyama has never been good at remembering things.

>>50013838
>But yeah, Toriyama has never been good at remembering things.
Reminder that he completely forgot Launch's existence for most of Z.

>>50013531
Interestingly, human-saiyan hybrids (who amount to human minds in saiyan bodies) are better at achieving Super Saiyan than purebloods are.

Basically humans have a "heart of justice" that lets them power up through strong emotion, whereas most saiyans just care about fighting for its own sake. Because the Super Saiyan transformation is emotion-based, humans can reach it more easily than saiyans do.

Of course half-saiyans also don't have a saiyan-level drive to improve themselves, nor do they have the same instinctive grasp of how their abilities work (see: Trunks and Gohan failing to notice the downside of the giant-muscles transformation, but Goku and Vegeta spotting it instantly).

>>50014513
>whereas most saiyans just care about fighting for its own sake.
You know, in a better writer's hands, a race that is pretty much hardwired to view combat as awesome and fun and grow stronger from being almost killed would be an interesting speculative fiction idea and an actually fairly alien mindset in its own right. Inb4 Orks

Rolled 4 (1d20)

>>50009339

Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>50009339
>>50014821
Fine, I can't disbelieve the illusion, I accept that he's the god of destruction. But I want another roll to disbelieve the bluff, on the grounds that recognizing the god as such requires a level of revelation of the system you implied, and this being "his job" as you put it implies that a planet would not be destroyed without a reason up front rather than at some culinary/battlelust whim.

>>50014566
There'd previously been a trend of shonen heroes who'd go to great lengths to "have a fair fight" with the villain, then weep for them after they died.

The saiyans were a parody of this, who only did all that stuff because they had warped priorities and placed "having a good fight" above "save the world". Goku repeatedly tries to save his villains' lives, not to redeem them, but just so he can fight them again.

Some of this was lost in the English dub, though, which tried to make Goku more traditionally heroic.

>>50014937
This is perhaps best shown when Cell flat-out tells Vegeta that if he absorbs Android 18 then he'll become far more powerful and be able to give Vegeta a decent fight. So Vegeta lets Cell go through with it and predictably promptly gets his shit wrecked.

>>50013338
Goku vs Beerus in an eating contest. Who wins?

>>50015385
Champa.

>>49994973
Spicy McChicken or nothing.

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ggwp

>>50015385
The bookie.

>>50015204
>>50014937
Cell was just a great saga.
Goku giving Cell the senzu bean so he can have a fair fight with Gohan. Not understanding that Gohan doesn't want a fair fight, he doesn't want to fight at all. Then all the non-saiyans erupting behind him on how much of a fucking retard Goku is for not understanding this while all the saiyans are stone faced.

>>50013467
Fuck you, the Double Down was delicious.
Unless that chick was crying from joy, then it's understandable.
The ironic part is health nuts bitched enough to get it replaced with the doublicioius, which replaced the second chicken breast with a bun, somehow making it LESS healthy in the process.

>>49994950
With nutella, butter and toast.

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>>50011439
This scene was sicker in the anime.

>>50013584
Kaioken was supposed to fuck your body over, and overdoing it (kaioken times ten!) was supposed to be deadly. Being a Saiyan, Goku could come back from it.
This is me just spitballing.

>>49997218
We anons continue to create and contribute. Among those contributions are shitposts which clutter the original and inspired ideas of the divine. Without the god of destruction (the janitor) we would only have cluttered messes posts would become stale and things would become monotonous. By constantly destroying the janitor forces us to embrace creativity in order to fill the void which is constantly being opened.

>>50018183
This. At least fried chicken has brotein, and isn't JUST carbs.

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>Mfw I constantly put any points I can spare into knowledge: cooking
>Mfw my character has a somewhat unhealthy obsession for collecting and growing any exotic spices he can get hold of


Guess it's time to roll up the sleeves and get to cooking. If he doesn't blow up the planet and minds his manners then i'll be certain to give him some sausages and jerky for the ride home. If I fail then there's always one of the dozen or so planes our wizard made.

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>>49996000
TRIPS
>also I breakout my chef robes and wizard hat, "WELCOME TO MY KITCHEN, WE'RE ITCHIN TO SERVE YOU."

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>>49994950
If I must Cook, then Cook I must.

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>>49996839

Glories has one.

>>49996559

>referencing SMA at all in 2.Xe's current environment
>Pic related

>>49994950
How the flipping fuck are you in my setting bro? and why am I in my setting?

Would sum it up.

I would toss him a jar of vegemite and watch the world burn

>>50010716
Nah, that's inCase's 'debut' comic or something.

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>>49994950
He gets one shot by one of the players. Seriously DBZ level entities are pretty low of the totem pole where our group is headed, which is in the crossfire of a group of manifested DMs and their NPC counterparts trying to unfuck themselves from without end eras-long of political games.

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>>50013177

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I cast prestidigitation on a cashew too make it the most delicious thing in the world.
nothing changes

>>49994950
I immediately approach the BBC with my concept for the most tense and nerve-wracking reality TV show ever - gather together the greatest chefs from around the world and have them compete to satisfy the God of Destruction's glorious palate. Can they please him before he decides to end all human achievement in a storm of ethereal flame? Tune in next week to find out.

>>50024911
You playing a high-level WoD game or some shit? High-level DB characters are fairly crazy in terms of power.

>>50028987
High-level DB characters are martially powerful with occasional mid-level conceptual magic tricks. I'm not the person you're replying to, but there's plenty of stuff that gets around literally anything anybody can do in Dragon Ball at any scale on the setting.

>>50000000

>>50025871
Clearly you've never had a buttered toffee cashew. God bless the Amish folk for introducing those things to me. Bless them, and then damn them for making them so damned addictive.

>>50017888
Yeah, that's really Gokus major flaw throughout all of DBZ. He fights like he's in a martial arts tournament and holds back when he shouldn't, and spares enemies who have no business being spared.

He was doing it in Super too and nearly got the Earth destroyed because of it.

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Introduce him to the 3 kitsune members of the party, then ask him politely to nuke the planet.

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Duhuhuhu!

Ifn dershu wandershin me cookinee, dyuu havin du seet doon undin waitin djoor durn! Huhuhu.

>>49994950
Luckily, my paladin is also a chef, so she'd roll along with it a fight/disaster. She's been cooking mostly with monster meat, though. So I'm not sure if how much he'd like cockatrice breasts.

>>50036042
*roll with it to avoid a fight/disaster.

>>50036042
He'll eat pretty much anything, so it's worth a shot.

>>49994950
I ensure Noobis we will find someone who will lose on purpose. We can sort it out before lunch and have time to get to a five star restaurant.
As long as he leaves behind enough resources so that civilization can arise again, he can destroy the Earth as many times over as he wants, for all I care.

>>50013177
As it involves neither food nor fighting, he destroys your setting's universe and moves on.

>>49994950
In canon, Beerus is extremely impressed with even cheap and shitty earth food. Apparently humanity's hat in Dragonball's universe is our incredible culinary abilities, even rare and incredibly expensive space delicacies pale in comparison to a bowl of instant noodles made on earth, and even our poorest people eat better food than kings and emperors throughout the galaxy.

We could impress Beerus enough to get him to reconsider blowing up the earth with the nip equivalent of McNuggets and a pudding cup.

>>49996363
In Dragonball lore the gods of destruction are tightly linked to the gods of creation, but the Kaioshin's talents are more for the delicate and subtle arts of creation. They've got all kinds of crazy magic tech going on, but they're not the toughest things around. Strong, but not as strong as say, Perfect Cell, Dabura, or Majin Buu. But Hakaishin are REALLY fucking strong. The only things stronger than them are the supreme overlord of the multiverse and his personal servants. Oh, and their butlers. They are at least somewhat weaker than their own manservants. It's dragonball.

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Where's that Ork food critiq when we need him?

>>50007332
"GENTLEMEN. I HAVE MADE LOVE TO THIS MACHINE."

>>50013311
A human created a pair of androids which were stronger by far than a guy who ruled most of the galaxy by dint of his personal power, and later on made a bio-android that was stronger by far than they were, and in the end became as powerful as Literally-Satan.

He made a guy who could beat up the Devil. In a tube.

And he wasn't even all that great compared to other human scientists in the same setting. If you left Dragonball earth alone for like a couple more decades then Frieza would have looked up and noticed that one planet the Saiyans were supposed to have taken over, and then Android 116 would punch his head so far into his torso that he'd shit out his own teeth, steal his spaceships and rule the galaxy all by itself until it made Beerus mad.

>>50039520
That human actually created a quintet (octet, counting the movies) of androids that were stronger than Frieza, and then promptly put his own brain inside one of them.

And being stronger than Satan was Cell's power without actually training. If he did train then he'd probably become stronger than Beerus in half a year, tops.

>>50039520
See
>>50013437
and
>>50013460


You'd have a point if Gero, or the Briefs, made their super incredible shit as anything but
But they don't, because they are idiots despite being geniuses.

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>>49994950
I say, "OK"

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>>50039559
I doubt Cell would have reached Beerus level that quickly. He definitely had the potential, but I don't think he had the mentality to train to a divine level like Goku and Vegeta do.

I could see him attacking Beerus and getting rocked though.

Also
>powerful as Literally-Satan

He's got nothing on not literal-Satan, plot armor is a hell of a boost.

>>50040519
I know people rag on him, but Mr. Satan isn't even a bad martial artist. He legitimately won the World Tournament, twice I think. He just doesn't know how to use Ki.

>>50040519
Frieza got stronger than blue in four months of frankly kind of shitty training, I think he just beat up on Tagoma for most of it.
Cell is literally Frieza plus a bunch of other guys, and with probably the most horrendously overpowered group of abilities a main villain in DB has had, discounting Zamasu.

And of course he'd never beat The Champ.

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>>50040536
Mr. Satan is a good guy. And yeah, he's basically reached the maximum level of power you can get without using Ki. I mean he can pull buses, that's irl olympian level right there.

He's also a way better father and grandfather than Goku.

>>50040570
>>50040519
Also, Cell could have gone the Kid Buu route and become a cosmic wrecking ball and reached godlike power that way.
>Go to planet
>Blow up self and planet
>Regenerate, Zenkai boost
>Repeat endlessly

>>50040961
God that episode of super pissed me off. Not because of Satan, but because of Chichi. Satan and Gohan were playing with Pan, Videl was fine with it, and Chichi comes in acting like Pan is her kid.

>>50040997
At least Piccolo puts her in her place later on.

>>49994983

>my powers come from the sun!

yeah, beerus could blow up the sun with 1% of his power. You ain't got shit, buddy

>>49996241

remember how in exalted you have mortals, who can't possibly fight exalted no matter how strong they are? yeah, atleast the same difference in scale exists between your exalted and Beerus. Based on what I've seen of it, Exalted would place somewhere around PL9000~, wouldn't even be able to beat Freeza. You just have the benefit of mostly having Unusual powers that might be able to annoy them, like some mooks occasionally do.

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>>50031353
You'd have to do it before combat or they'd have to let you do it to them first.

And you have to make sure that their friend networks don't do something to go revive them meanwhile.

Otherwise, by Dragon Ball episode 24 they're already moving faster than the human eye can see and if they wanted to they could just murder you across the planet by the time you inhaled air to speak your magic.

>>50039520
can't argue with this

>>50040570
Frieza is like the humanoid manifestation of lazyness & wasted potential.
His whole arc is about pushing limits and surpassing the impossible and the moment he gives a little bit of a fuck he reaches the Arcosian equivalent of Super Saiyan.

I can only imagine that if Frieza wished the dragonballs to have Goku's upbringing to that moment that he'd literally be a 120,000,000 times stronger than current Super Blue Goku

For Cell it entirely depends if he can actually Super Saiyan or not if he could reach Blue, otherwise he'd cap out at God Form, maybe be able to Gold( if he could).
I don't think Cell was designed with any real drawbacks and I'll just have to assume that he has the power to reach Saiyan Blue and Frieza Gold simultaneously, and probably Kaioken x20 during that.

>>50009514

he is training again. Maybe someday he'll get to reclaim his title.

>>50041554
Yeah, when Piccolo's relevant again.

>>50041567

so next time someone needs to be worfed?

>>50041651
No, that's Vegeta's job.

>>50041567
Piccolo will be relevant when Pan gets old enough to be combat trained. He's the official Saiyan babysitter afterall.

>>50041667

Depends on the point in the arc/saga. When a villain first shows up Picollo gets worfed, when they're getting ready for the final battle Vegeta gets worfed.

>>50010259
Evil space Goku is really Zamassu, the guy always traveling with him, from another timeline. One Zamasu got the Super Dragonballs, wished that another Zamasu that shared his ideals would swap bodies with goku.

Black Goku kills Goku, Chichi, and Goten.

Zamasu and the now 'Black' goku want to destroy all life on the planets but not the planets themselves, because all life that isn't god-life is impure and ugly.

>>50041767
They don't want to destroy all life, they just want to destroy all sapient life so they can start over.

They have no problem with plants or animals, hence why the Zamatwo live in a cabin in a forest.

>>50041767
>One Zamasu got the Super Dragonballs, wished that another Zamasu that shared his ideals would swap bodies with goku.
No, both versions of Zamasu got the Super Dragonballs.

Basically, at some point in the future, Zamasu will use the Super Dragonballs to steal Goku's body (becoming "Goku Black"). Then he'll use the Supreme Kais' Time Ring to travel to Future Trunks's timeline (where Beerus is dead, because the Supreme Kai died fighting Babidi) and recruit his counterpart. FT Zamasu then uses the Super Dragonballs to wish for perfect immortality.

Beerus finds out about this and kills present Zamasu before he can begin his plan, but because Goku Black was wearing a Time Ring he's immune to being paradoxed out of existence like that.

>>49994950
i get to him first. since the dbz d10 thing has been around /tg/ i've thought of making a super kung fu cook, who travels around the galaxy collecting ingredients toriko style before competing in an iron chef tournament, culminating in an epsode of sweet genius judged by Lord Beerus.

https://youtu.be/15NXrnyT2HM

>>50024911
Is it "destroying the universe" high?

>>50041153
>Wishes for all of Goku's experience and knowledge
>Becomes the most powerful fighter ever seen
>Turns him into a legitimately nice person by accident
>Fucks off to meditate on the nature of the Universe

Oh that would have been delicious.

>>49994950
well since he's basically cosmic level garfield i make him lasagna to stop him from destroying the earth

>>49994950
He's super impressed with basically any earth food, I could just dump cheese on some noodles and save the world

>>49997509
He spent years in Japan as a literal samurai

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So when will Cell return, spawn a few Cell Jrs for SSJG & then train for Golden?

>>50044088
Universal tournament probably. He'll absorb the Omni-King and make it the Universal Cell Games.

>>50043768
>YOU LAZY GOD, YOU ARE SO FAT

>>50044088
Here's a question. If Golden Mode is for Freiza's Race, and Super Sayian/Blue is for Sayians.
Will he be able to combine the two?

>>50007492
Challenge accepted. That is the goal of my hero. To suplex a black hole.

>>49994950

Let nature take its course.