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>a pack of ghouls is terrorizing a local village >fight

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>a pack of ghouls is terrorizing a local village
>fight your way into their nest deep under the cemetery
>the lead ghoul agrees to stop raiding the town, but only if you marry his daughter

wat do
>>
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>>49872601
We purge
>>
It's a trick, you'll become a ghoul as soon as you kiss her.

Or fuck her, whichever comes first.
>>
I came here to gather XP.
>>
>>49872601
Sure but first we are 'killing' her then casting raise dead on her.
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>>49872631
DEUS VULT!
>>
>>49872601
Waaaait a minute.
Aren't ghouls already undead? how is he able to physically reproduce? Seriously, if he has a daughter, is she alive when she's born or is she dead when she's born making her dead, but undead-dead.

I am so confused.
>>
The fact we fought our way up to him sure as hell doesn't make it sound like he's not in a position to dictate terns to us.
>>
>>49872601
a ghoul?
sure, ghouls are hot
long tongues
>>
>>49872682
They might have simply both turned into ghouls after dieing.
>>
>>49872682
They're UNdead. That means they ain't dead, idiot.
>>
>>49872682
What are you some kind of idiot?

Both dad and daughter were alive, then they died and turned.

Jesus /tg/
>>
>>49872693
The Ghouls are not the only residents of the crypts. Cranium rats, skeletons, zombies...
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>>49872800
We'll purge them too, then.
>>
>>49873149
>not wanting to snug a ghoul
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>>49872601
No. Girls have cooties.
>>
>>49872601

Fire.

A lot of fire.
>>
>>49872601
Kek, I can do both, kill them all and fuck the daughter
>>
>>49872601
How does a undead get a daughter?

Also I came in there being pretty sure I can kill these monsters, so I deny and kill.
>>
>>49872601
Well fuck no, these cunts only eat corpses and they still go after the living. They deserve to be put down.
>>
Sorry Ghoul lord, can't hear you over all the oil and torches I'm throwing around down here.
>>
>>49872797
I killed you in Castlevania :Circle of the Moon.
>>
>>49873203
Not a necrophile, sorry.
>>
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>>49872601
My flames tell me that it's time to PURGE.
>>
>>49873548
gaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyy
>>
>>49872601

>Kill the objectively destructive monsters who are murdering harmless villagers

Or

>Play along with the contrived demands of a defeated bad guy so the DM doesn't get Butthead and go make a thread about how his players are murderhobos who "never try diplomacy"

I roll to attack.
>>
>>49873740
The whole scene was an illusion from a fairy as a test. Your mindless rage has proven your lack of worth, and you are killed immediately.
>>
>>49873740
Defeated?

Nobody said the leader was defeated. Maybe he started screaming that shit the second he kicked down the gate. Maybe you put up a good enough fight and this is his way of not killing you.

But it is rather telling that you immediately jump towards letting the die think for you.
>>
>>49873837

The OP pretty clearly implies the players have an upper hand in some way. "Fight your way through their nest" implies you've fought through the bulk of the ghoul lord's forces and now have him cornered.
>>
>>49873896
If the players have the upperhand why is the ghoul trying to push a shitty deal on them?

You don't push shitty deals on people unless there's a chance they'll be taken. Otherwise the literal only answer is oh the ghoul king is nutters just ignore him.
>>
>>49873837
Nope, we're just here to play a game, and that game is not Zombie Waifu Simulator 2016. The GM can go be a necrophile some other time.
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>>49872601
Challenge him to single combat, if you win you kill their leader. If you lose daddy gets to bring back his new son in law from the dead.

This wat you definitely don't die for real.
Get to have a heroic death.
Get some nice duel with ample time to monologue.
Either get to marry a qt ghoul without it being wierd cause you're also a ghoul or marry a qt farmgirl whose village you saved.

win/win
>>
>>49873943

That's exactly my question.

I've seen threads like this before, where OP presents some kind of situation where an entity in absolutely no position to make petty demands of the players starts doing just that.

Was anyone here for that thread where the OP said the villagers would only let you clear out the monsters infesting their local crypt if you gave them your party cleric as a hostage?

Being diplomatic or willing to negotiate as a PC does not mean you have to bend over the barrel for every fucking monster and NPC you encounter.
>>
>>49873965
>Was anyone here for that thread where the OP said the villagers would only let you clear out the monsters infesting their local crypt if you gave them your party cleric as a hostage?

Holy shit what? Like I guess you just have fucking monsters in your crypt because crazy aside would the cleric not literally be the best person for the job?
>>
>>49873896
Can you not read?

>>49872601
>fight your way into their nest deep under the cemetery

You fought your way to the doorstep of the nest, not THROUGH the nest.
>>
>>49873986

It was to "ensure" the adventurers wouldn't graverob.

The funniest part was a bunch of people in the thread were calling the guys who didn't want to agree to those terms murderhoboing rollplayers.

>>49873991
Fighting your way "into" something means you met and defeated resistance both before and after you entered it.

There's no reason to assume you don't have the ghoul leader on the ropes in the situation OP provides.

And again, even if I haven't gotten to him yet, why would I take up his offer, the OP still implies my party and I are winning, or at the very least are not yet in a position where defeat is inevitable (the only situation where anyone should agree to the ghoul leader's terms).

This is not some local lord who's politically opposed to another local lord. There isn't any politicking or intrigue in this situation. It's a gang of low-level monsters who are explicitly stated to be terrorizing a village of defenseless morons. Why would I go into this encounter with "talk the monsters down" as my Plan A?
>>
>>49872601
Fuck that bitch
>>
>>49874104
>It was to "ensure" the adventurers wouldn't graverob.
Fucking check their pockets as they leave then, how the fuck does keeping dave locked in a store room stop me from nicking your grandma's rings?

Because if I agreed to that I would steal fucking everything nailed down to make the extra burden worth it. Put it in a sack, and just leave it not in the village only for the gm who thought that this was all normal to have someone's child trip over my treasure hole. I'd even plead the case that we leave the monsters be while doing so if at all possible.
>>
>>49874261
I'm sure she'd like that.
>>
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>>49872601
I agree.
>>
>>49873814
Damnit Steve!

Fine fine, I fuck the ghoul-girl.
>>
>>49872601
Kill them all, why would I ever do otherwise? I've already fought my way to them, I have the upper hand, and see little reason in negotiating things I don't need to for questionable purposes.
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>>49874326
Sorry, no take backs. Time to reroll your character.
>>
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>>49874319
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>>49874372
>>
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>>49874372

>shorts and a hoodie
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>>49874417
>Captcha: 34480 Humped
What does it mean?
>>
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>>49874319

I barely remember those Bailey School Kids books, but wasn't this one of the few where her "supernatural-ness" was categorically disproved? Like I know the hallmark of the series is to basically leave it ambiguous by the end of it with like one or two unexplainable things, but I seem to remember the ending to this one just being, "Nope, she just went goth after a family member died. The End."
>>
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>>49874472

>Nope, she just went goth after a family member died. The End.

Jeeze.
>>
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>>49872601
Kill them all.
>>
>>49874372
Ghouls are for lewd
>>
>>49872601
She is a whore, of course I smite him.
>>
>>49872601
Joke's on you, this is my fetish.
>>
>>49874469
source
>>
>>49875525
So on a scale from 1 to you can't fucking count why bother, just how retarded are you?
>>
>>49875525
http://rule34.paheal.net/post/view/1364954

>>49875597
You were saying?
>>
>>49875446
So does she use her paralyzing claws?
>>
>>49875720
but seriously, >>49875525 was just pointing out how fucking stupid it is to ask for sauce on something that had a source post already.
Seriously, it's simple shit-
>>
>>49876529
and I fucked up my post. Looks like I'm retarded too.
>>
>>49876548
Don't worry, we're all retarded.
>>
>>49872601
Thanks OP this was one of the netter wat do type questions i've seen on /tg/ in a long time
>>
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>>49876736

>netter
>>
>>49876830
Better
>>
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>>49876853

My request still stands.

What is possibly "better" about this? It's still a wat do question. All of those are patently bad, because they're just transparent no-win scenarios meant to browbeat the players into doing something against their own interests and in the interests of whatever political/philosophical/sexual agenda is driving the GM.

This shit is absolutely no better than the classic orc baby scenario.
>>
>>49872642
Is coming first. Guaranteed.
>>
>>49874278
Oh, he was planning to fuck the cleric.
>>
>>49872705
Yes, but I'm knocking her teeth out before I stick anything in there.

>>49872800
Good thing we brought a Cleric, a Paladin, and a Pale Master with us.

>>49873207
No. Ghouls have cooters.

>>49873214
It's our desire.

>>49873252
This.

>>49873362
I like this response.

>>49873548
For everybody, that all depends on the body.

>>49873946
I also like this response.

>>49873960
I like this as well.

>>49874297
She probably doesn't have a mind for anything.

>>49874469
The fuck they don't, Mr. Pic.

>>49876527
Only to make it weirdly good.

>>49876635
Agreed.
>>
>>49872601
Tell him to fuck right off. Even if he does have a smoking hot daughter, he was raiding a village I like.
>>
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>>49872601
>>
>>49872601
WELP LOOKS LIKE
>I swear to the Sun, Mahoney, if you say wh-
I'M GONNA BE DOIN' SOME BONIN' TONIGHT!
>Gods-fucking-damnit, man. Have some tact, you brainless pile of bones.
HEY, I COULDA BEEN MORE CRUDE AND SAID SHE'D BE USIN' THAT TONGUE ON MY COCCYX!
>Look, Mr. Ghoul, we're sorry about him. Our necromancer screwed something up in the raise ritual, we don't know what.
Just another day in the unlife of Tony Mahoney and his Boney Pony, Tromboney.
>>
>>49879185
that's retarded
i keked
>>
>>49872601
Wait, how would this cure your continuous need and hunger for the flesh of man? This solves nothing.
>>
>>49880088
Simple
The wedding ring you'll be wearing is a ring of regeneration
>>
>>49872601
Setting dependant, I guess. Are "ghouls" zombie-like undead, minor vampires or corpse-eating but very much alive humanoids?
Trick question, it doesn't matter: talk to the lady, maybe we'll get on.
>>
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>>49880219

>willfully acquiescing to the demands of monsters
>>
>>49880012
Thanks.
Bone-headed is what I do best.
>>
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I teach them that divine smite does extra damage against undead
>>
>>49876925
>no-win scenario

you get a smoking hot ghoul waifu

how is that not a win?
>>
>>49872601
We've come this far already, might as well just kill everyone else in here and get our reward.
>>
>>49872601
I tell that Pickman fucker to shove his paintbrush up his rectum and to fall off a Nightgaunt.
Then I let him get torn to shreds by Zoogs
>>
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>>49874533
Sadly she's down one psyker corgi at the moment. This is the perfect time for the agents of chaos to strike.
>>
>>49882372
She only starts smoking after the sorcerer casts firebolt at her.
>>
>this much purgeposting
>/tg/ will never have a goulfriend
>>
>>49885270
They attacked a village. Even if you believed Goul lives matter they slaughtered innocents and then had the nerve to negotiate from a position of weakness and pawn off some smelly zombie bitch who's breath smells like a few of your friends dead bodies.
>>
>>49872601

Maybe with a ton of illusion spells I could make it work.
>>
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>>49872601
See, people just don't know a business opportunity when they see one: a large medieval city produces a huge quantity of corpses, which are a logistical problem, a public health hazard and, this being fantasy land, come with a risk of rising as any of a dozen sorts of corporeal undead.

What one needs is a way of safely disposing of all of these bodies: burning them is smelly and expensive; dissolving them in the powerful stomach acids of an obligate scavenger is far safer and more sanitary.
>>
>>49872601
Fair enough dad. That's the price of being a hero. If she eats my guts though I'm gonna be really mad.
>>
>>49872601
What kind of Ghoul?
Undead monsters?
Morlock-esque Corpse eaters?
Ringworld furries?

There's been a few different varieties depending on the setting.
>>
>>49885465

thats.... a good point actually, using ghouls as public sanitation workers is a pretty sweet idea, so long as you can keep them from infecting more folks.
>>
>>49885892
Exactly, and who wouldn't want to marry a nice girl who gets paid to eat free dinners?
>so long as you can keep them from infecting more folks.
That's if ghouls are even a disease thing, in this setting, I guess most undead have a killed by an X, rise as an X thing.

That's a question: how does immunity work, in D&D land? If I contract a disease, but cure myself by making the saves, am I immune?
>>
>>49885379
Don't be so harsh. I'm sure she'll learn to see your inner beauty.
>>
>>49872631
>>49873149
>>49873651
Bulimia is a terrible condition, I hope you all get better. Now excuse me, I have a wedding to plan.
>>
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>>49872601
I will agree to his terms, and love his daughter with all of ny heart, but will not marry her.
If he gets mad, or asks for an explanation, I'll just say that where I come from, "Marriage" may be a culture shock to him.
>>
What I don't understand is that, although in no way in OPs premise he tells us that we can't win the fight against the ghouls, which I assume we can unless stated otherwise, so why would I care for their leaders terms when I can eradicate them?

I mean, most of my characters so far have proved capable of handling a ghoul horde. And come on, we've reached their leader, we certainly carved a bloody path there. I don't see why he thinks he can still negotiate. It's like belgium turning to Germany in WWII, and being all

"Well, alright, I'll let you go through my lands, but only if you pay me a substantial tribute."

You know what I mean?
>>
>>49872797
>calling him out with name of grand necromaner himself.
>>
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>>49872601
Mr. P. Elvis is pushed forward by the group and begrudgingly accepts, on the condition that he is not confined anywhere and that he can continue with his journey.
>>
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>>49887055
The chapel's still closed
Still closed.

Funny about that.
apparently anri shows up there sometime during the ending
>>
>>49887093
Well, one imagines that this is being offered as a socially vexing alternative to the extermination of rational beings, because some people, though clearly not you, would like to entertain a fantasy of brokering peace between unlike forces. The argument can be made to exterminate them, and it usually stems from categorically declaring them monsters, or that their annihilation is mandated because they attempted to forward their own existence against the will of the mentioned village, but to decide in either direction could be validated with any number of imaginary perspectives. Ultimately these wat do threads all seem to come down to the same question of reconciling with outsiders (of whatever permutation) or exterminating them, or some other scenario where half the posters dehumanize the subject and the other half are over empathetic.

But that's all pseudo-intellectual bullshit, this is about asking about your flesh eating waifu. I've been in a late antiquity sort of fantasy game as an undead legionnaire wandering the /not/holy land with a broad sense disappointment. He'd be glad to pound some dubiously alive Bedouin cannibal pussy, and would then go on to assume neither she nor-daddy will mind ghoul-daughter being one squeeze among many.
>>
>>49889312
Whenever someone doesn't specify details of fictional creatures, I use whatever one wants to call the fantasy version of Occam Razor and assume said creature is the closest possible to it's more known version, while it doesn't conflict with the premise.

Ghouls are mostly known to being undead, and being cannibals, driven to eat live human flesh. Usually they are not prone to reason, if they are even capable of speech and complex thought. But OP premisse assume they are.

In no way he tells us they are not flesh eating monstrosities. And they have been raiding a village, which sorta is the expected behavior of flesh eating monstrosities. Even evil characters, in the way I play them, would see more benefit in exterminating the ghouls. There are better spouses to have through diplomatic marriage than the wife of a crypt dweller cannibal. And the neutral and good characters would do so out of distrust for flesh eating undeads, and as vermin control.

Plus, I wouldn't want flesh eating mouths near my cock, and I'm very fond of blowjobs, so ghoul waifu isnt a thing for me.
>>
>>49889312
All xenos must be purged. All abhumans must be purged. Fuck off weakling.
>>
>>49872601
hose her down, fit a ring gag and apply breath freshener.

i bet she can do wonders with that tounge.
>>
>>49878844
...what's this, the new ND?
>>
>>49872601
Kill them all like we originally planned to?

Not like ghouls are any sort of difficult fight.
>>
>>49891475
>>49873740
>>
>>49876736
It's probably one of the worst.
>>
>>49891417
the radiant and ethereal phallus of the chosen son of mithras will not be denied tribute, for it is the holy right of all beings to freely submit to righteous imperium, be they low man or of the orders of tar-Bauglir. Not like you'd know anything about that, barbarian.
>>
>>49891706
just realized I mixed up my Rome references and Numenor references. Really you get the picture regardless. It really does happen in a lot of games that I end up playing some exploring legion commander who makes a point of not showing the barbarous natives any preference over the other reasoning savages of the untamed land, and is a dick about it straight to their faces.
>>
>>49885465
Except then you get a bunch of typhoid marry half zombies running around.

Just burn them, saves you from dealing with necromancers later too.
>>
>>49872601
Ok. We bring them into the church.

Then we cast "consecrate".
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