Instead of doing all kinds of "normal" shit to beat

>>49740436
>How do I get out of the contract now?

You don't.

>>49740436
>grant him my soul if a meteor completely obliterated a certain tyrant's castle
>completely obliterated
>COMPLETELY
You did leave a tower or bit of wall on the planet somewhere didn't you?

>>49740436
>I made a deal with the Devil
>There's no way someone who's been pulling shit since the beginning of time can outsmart me :^)

Get on your knees for !Jesus, and hope that you die before he comes back for payment.

>trying to pull an "exact words" type of deal on the Devil
>with a statement that vague

you deserve it, tricking the great trickster himself requires skill and finesse


Heck you know what the greatest trick is? Him making you believe you have a chance in the first place. Really virtually nobody can actually outsmart the Devil, but occasionally he'll let a schmuck get the better of him preferably in some kind of public contest just so the next 1000 idiots thinking of selling their soul actually assume they have a fair chance of keeping it.

>>49740436
It's only a meteor if it enters the atmosphere, otherwise it's a meteoroid. You win if it's destroyed outside an atmosphere

Should've taken a brick from it. It wouldn't have been complete if it was missing a brick, and as long as that brick stayed in your possession without being completely destroyed by lava or something. Or use the technicality of the castle leaving debris and was therefore NOT completely obliterated

>>49740436
"Near Earth Object (NEO) - Near Earth Objects are asteroids or comets that have orbits around the Sun that bring them close to the Earth. The actual definition of an NEO is a comet or asteroid whose orbit brings it close to Earth’s orbit.

Asteroid - A relatively small, inactive body, composed of rock, carbon or metal, which is orbiting the Sun.

Comet - A relatively small, sometimes active object, which is composed of dirt and ices. Comets are characterised by dust and gas tails when in proximity to the Sun. Far from the Sun it is difficult to distinguish an asteroid from a comet.

Meteoroid - A small particle from an asteroid or comet orbiting the Sun.

Meteor - A meteoroid that is observed as it burns up in the Earth’s atmosphere – a shooting star.

Meteorite - A meteoroid that survives its passage through the Earth’s atmosphere and impacts the Earth’s surface."

>>49740654
So, by definition, you're in the clear since a meteor completely burns up on entry.

>>49740603
Is a brick really a part of a castle if there's nothing else left? The meteoroid argument is probably better if you ask me

hold on if that castle collides with and burns up in the atmosphere of a planet wouldn't in technically be destroyed by a meteor (itself)

>>49740675
nah, the castle could still be obliterated by a Tunguska like event where the meteor (term used correctly) explodes right above the ground and flattens the area with its shockwave

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>>49740436

>>49740436

Punch the DM until the deal is recanted. You Win!

>>49740654
>the Devil in a fantasy world is bound by the terminology conventions of modern English-speaking Earth

>>49740785
It could be kind of fun, but it really is just meta when the DM falls for that shit in the first place. The thing with "deals with the devil" is they're supposed to be smart. I mean if you ask a devil to kill someone by a stalagmite falling on them you should be shocked when it happens through some contrived way rather than laughing at the GM for mixing stalagmites and stalactites up

>>49740557
THIS

>>49740757
>do something which has logical consequences, even if they're severe
>be mad when logical consequences happen

bet you're also pissed that when you try to go and assassinate the king, turns out he has whole bunch of quality guards ready to prevent you from doing so

Why the fuck do retards keep cropping up that think they can outsmart ancient, immortal beings that have bin at this for millenia?

What the fuck are you going to do when the Devil tells you that the intent of the contract is fullfilled and drags your soul off to hell? Because your semantic horseshit won't hold water in front of a regular court, much less with the prince of motherfucking darkness.

Or better yet, what will you do when he rapes your pedantic ass and drags you off simply because he is the Devil and doesn't need to deal with your shit?

Nigger, don't try to argue with the Devil, start running and try to find some miraculous bullshit to save yourself. If you're lucky, there's a holy year in Rome and you can try and get Absolution by passing all the holy doors or something.

Even if you do outsmart the devil, what's to stop him from launching you into space afterwards?

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>>49740436
You're an idiot and you're going to get your soul devoured. Making a deal with a devil is like pointing a gun at something- you'd better be ready to deal with the consequences of firing, because 'I didn't mean to shoot him' doesn't win you a lot of sympathy in court.
Pic related.

>>49740473
Matter will be left behind that once used to be the castle, but if the remains as a whole can no longer be called a castle, then the pattern of materials that was the castle has indeed been obliterated.

>>49740436
I don't understand what your plan was from the beginning. You were going to use the exact word tactic but what was your original bullshit plan going to be and how did his castle being thrown into space make it not work?

Sorry if I'm retarded and this is obvious.

>>49740436
>implying you weren't going to hell anyway
That soul was never yours to sell.

>>49740993
Most of the people that want to have stories where they "out smart the devil" are edge lord fedora tippers that think "humanity will raise of God and devil a like"

Basically Humanity fuck ya types.

>>49740436
I hope you negotiated that contract

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZwgLt0QadU

>>49740654
So the term shooting star only refers to meteors?

>>49740436
Make deals with multiple other devils and willing outsiders. Have them fight one another. In the meantime, find a way to save your skin in these new circumstances.

>>49740557
^This, you already won. Devil is a tard.

>>49740555
Ha! That's the best theory on tricking the devil I've seen in a while.

>>49740436
Lawyerfag here. I never got how this exact words thing worked. Interpreting law and contracts is 1st semester stuff and interpretation according to telos (meaning/aim) IS pretty IS a thing..

Shit devil. When I GM, magical contracts are intent for intent. No deception, just an ironclad agreement.

>>49742940
Its like running a casino
If nobody ever wins, then nobody spends any money.
But if you arbitrarily pick one guy once in a while to win tons of folks will come thinking they're him.

And somehow I kinda like the idea of the Devil running hell like an evil casino

>>49743211
If it's DnD, Devils are the metaphysical embodiment of both Evil and Law. So actual meaning and aim have very little to do with their contracts.

>>49740436
obliterate part of the castle before the meteor does. Then, the meteor didn't do it completely.

That, or this
>>49740557

>>49740685
A castle is nothing unless you start with a stone... or something like that

>>49743866
you really want a contract with the devil where he has to destroy the entire world for you?

because that's what you're arguing right now

>>49743897
Better them than me

>>49740932
It was obviously a joke suggestion, calm down

>>49743897
It doesn't count unless he destroys the very concept of a castle.

>>49743465
Yeah, I know little about DnD, but I heard something like stupid lawful once. Guess that's it.

Just irks me abit as nothing like it would fly in real life and OPs soul would certainly rot in hell.

>>49740555
Like giving some jackass a golden fiddle?

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>>49740557

>>49740436
Obliterating a meteor with the tyrant's castle is not the same as obliterating the castle with a meteor.

>>49744084
At which point the contract becomes null and void, because the idea of a castle doesn't exist. It's a nonsense word.

>>49743211
"exact words" = "ignore the intent of the words within the context of the sentence and agreement as a whole, and instead use their as-dictionary definitions in a vacuum to win".

As a fellow lawyerfag and a GM I'd never allow this dumb shit because it's not clever or funny or interesting, it's just dumb autists trying to play "I'm not touching you *waggles hands 1/4" from face*" in a game. I'm too old for that shit.

>>49743861
Why just obliterate part of it? Obliterate the whole thing beforehand.

>>49740785

Actually, yes. The signifier may change but the signified doesn't. In this case the signified was "A meteoroid that is observed as it burns up in the Earth’s atmosphere – a shooting star.".

That was the concept expressed by "meteor". It may be that in the fantasy setting's language that was expressed by a different word, or that a specific word didn't exist and so a full explanatory sentence was needed, but nevertheless the concept being signified is that of a meteor.

>>49740711
Yeah, but OP said the castle itself is flying through space now, which means it's on course with a meteoroid; so not a meteor

>>49741755
Usually, since they leave no trace on the surface of earth. Otherwise it's classified as a meteorite

>>49740436
Well you did tell him to obliterate the castle with a meteor, and that is exactly what he's doing.

>>49744262
Wouldn't a solid gold fiddle weigh hundreds of pounds and sound crummy?

>>49744212
The idea is, demons gain power by consuming and controlling souls, and they have a pretty strict law down there to prevent hell from becoming hellish for them too. They're willing to put up with dumb mortals and go by their rules, but as immortal beings, they have a lot of experience with fucking people over within their own rules. Sure, they can grant whatever the person's asking, but then the guy could take years to die and become a slave. It's much easier to just mess things up, as Hell's justice system is obviously bent on the demons' side.

>>49744212
The idea is, demons gain power by consuming and controlling souls, and they have a pretty strict law down there to prevent hell from becoming hellish for them too. They're willing to put up with dumb mortals and go by their rules, but as immortal beings, they have a lot of experience with fucking people over within their own rules. Sure, they can grant whatever the person's asking, but then the guy could take years to die and could lock up his soul in other ways, like being trapped by a necromancer and such. It's much easier to just mess things up, as Hell's justice system is obviously bent on the demons' side.

>>49741494
He was going for a semantic difference between a meteor and a meteorite. While it is falling through the atmosphere it is a meteor. When it hits the surface, it is a meteorite. When a huge space rock obliterated the castle, he was going to argue a meteorite did it, not a meteor as the contract called for.

Of course, if the castle is flying at a space rock in "outer space," then it's going to hit an asteroid of meteoroid, not a meteor.

>>49745684
asteroid OR meteoroid

>Trying to trick the devil
>Not even having a plan before you try it
You fucked up kid.

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>be me
>Minor devil/magical contact rep
>respond to mortal summons
>"My soul for <x>"

>mfw mortals always put all chips on table
>mfw they don't start with <y> years of soul servitude
>mfw we make ≥3000% on most transactions, not counting interest from eternal soul servitude

>>49745403
I don't know about MULTIPLE hundreds of pounds, but yes. It would pretty much only be good as a trophy, or simply to sell for the bullion value.

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>>49740882
>>49742844
>>49743861
>>49744431
>>49740557

You retards didn't even consider the possibility of the castle entering the atmosphere of another planet and being collided with another meteor as it descended.

Never try to bargain with the devil ever please. You're obviously not cut out for it.

>>49740436

According to contract, the soul of Mr. X will be delivered to the devil if and only if a meteor -- here defined as a near-earth object -- completely obliterated the castle of Tyrant Y. This cannot be reasonably interpreted to include the asphyxiation of all the occupants of said castle, nor the damaging of the castle and its immediate environs by non-meteoric phenomena (cosmic radiation, friction from interstellar particles, etc., etc.). As such, neither the letter of the contract nor the spirit has been honored.

I would advise you contact a reputable planar law firm, such as Arcanaloth, Arcanaloth & Ultroloth, Wolfram & Hart, or Squire Patton Boggs, to represent you in this matter.

>>49745403
>Wouldn't a solid gold fiddle weigh hundreds of pounds and sound crummy?

Violins, violas, and other classical stringed instruments (cello, bass, acoustic guitar) are hollow in their bodies because that chamber needs to be hollow to amplify the vibrations.

It would still be a good bit of gold and worth a lot more than that due to the assumed level of craftsmanship, rarity of such pieces, and the story behind it.

>>49746260
>salesman literally working for hell
>bragging about margins

>no mention of his commission
>or how often he makes a sale
About what I would expect from one of hell's sales-people.

Just give the devil your shoe. One sole for a job well done.

If he's not into shoes due to his goat feet, a certain fish will also sufice.

If he says "Soul.. s-o-u-l!!", have some soul music prepared.

If none of that works, you go down in flames. If you have to be an asshole, be a flaming asshole.

>>49740436
How can the guy be a tyrant if he's in space?

>>49740436

You tried to trick the trickster and got tricked. I don't know what to tell you anon. Hope you had a nice life.

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>>49740436
>I decide to play a trick on the Devil
Here's when you fucked up.

>fully intending to use the "exact words" tactic.
Here's when you fucked up again.

Enjoy your afterlife in hell.

>>49747173
>>49746335
>>49745403
>>49744262
Ok so it depends on whether the fiddle is filled in with the gold, i.e. if it's a fiddle that's made of gold or if it's a gold statue in the image of a fiddle.

Lets hit the google.
Violins weight about a pound.
There are a lot of different wood types, buut lets say they average to 30 lb/ft3.
So it uses about 1/30 ft3 of wood.
Replacing that with gold, at a density of 1200 lb/ft3 results in it being 40 pounds of gold.
1 pound of gold costs about 18 kilobux nowadays.

So a golden fiddle would, on the material alone, worth 720 thousand dollars; with the undoubtedly unique craftsmanship easily bringing it into multimillion price.

>>49744262
Well, Johnny was indeed a jackass, but that version of the Devil was in a bind, way behind, and willing to make a deal. Frankly he sounds like he has some boss or something breathing down his neck about souls and meeting his quota.

I almost feel sorry for that Devil.

>>49740436
You know, why would a devil let mere pedantry to stop claiming the character's soul? Like who he's going to complain to, god?

>as his punishment the character is forced to wander the earth eternally, to make up and spread stories about a man beating the devil on a technicality

>>49740882
>>49746477
>You retards didn't even consider the possibility of the castle entering the atmosphere of another planet and being collided with another meteor as it descended.
Or even simpler, it's headed to your fantasy setting. extra DM points if the castle is obliterated, but the devil doesn't come for your soul until you witness the meteor (which I now affectionately call urectum) enters your atmosphere and burns up literally above you in the night sky.

Possibly spelling out your name or forming a middle finger of space dust for a scant moment.

>>49740436
Next time, offer your soul to God before trying to trick the Devil.

>>49740436
>not having the entire things planned out from the beginning
Nah you're fucked

>>49740436
>ask for destruction by meteor
>castle now hurtling toward an asteroid

Contract null. Good day, Satan.

>>49746477
Yup, nobody here is John Constantine.
Nevermind that. Nobody here is Cliff Baker for what matters.

>>49751673
God: sharing, giving, charoty, all that stuff.
Devil: greedy bastard.

So when your soul has been sold to both, the devil will just hog it for eternity, and God won't mind.

>>49751840
Ah, but you see, the Devil cannot claim your soul if God owns it. It cannot be stolen because it is freely given, it cannot be bought because God has no need to set a price, and merely touching it will burn the Devil to their core.

>>49751951
>it is freely given,

That's even worse. Devil asks for it, God gives it to him freely, eternal torment follows.

>>49746626
...Isn't that last one a lawnmower manufacturer?

>>49745403
I understood that reference

>>49746335
A violin isn't that big, and it's hollow. The wood's only a few millimeters thick.

Did you at least steal a brick from the castle?

>>49752412
The neck and pegs and such aren't hollow though.

>>49740557
>You win if it's destroyed outside an atmosphere
Nope.

Devil: Is this or is this not the rock that obliterated the castle?
Witness: It is the rock that did that.
Devil: Is this rock now burning up in a planet's atmosphere due to atmospheric friction?
Witness: Yes.
Devil: Does that meet with the definition of meteor?
Witness: Yes.
Devil: We submit the castle was obliterated by a rock that is a meteor as required by the terms of the contract. The plaintiff rests.

Or maybe the rock previously skipped through an atmosphere and so was a meteor. Or maybe a meteor was caught by a wizard and released in space. That's how these stoires turn out, with unexpected meanings thrown in by the devil.

Maybe player can get out of it by the same temporal argument if it's no longer the tyrant's castle.

Take the definition of obliterate from it's Latin root meaning to rub out writing. Castle's aren't writing so can't be obliterated.

OP is a bit dim for not having thought it through and really it comes down to appealing to the DM's generosity.

>>49742797

Pipe down Garth Ennis, you already used that idea 25 years ago.

>>49747224
>needing commission
>not doing it just because it's the wrong thing to do

You stop it from happening, that's how. You join forces with your former foe and save the castle together.

Sure, I doubt the tyrant will be grateful, especially if they discover who sent their castle hurtling into space in the first place, and you'll probably be back to fighting in a week or two. But the alternative is damnation. It's a real damned if you do, damned if you don't sort of situation you've got there, OP.

This reminds me of when I had a player straight up state that he wanted to hire an army of lawyers and go into fairy land to start making deals.

>>49740436
>>49740557
I think OP got it the wrong way around. The point was she tried to trick the devil because the stone wouldn't count inside the planet, but the devil was too smart and took the castle off planet.

>>49740436
>Not offering cash
Devil's gotta get the money for those "I sell my soul for wealth" faggots somehow. You really think he just conjures that shit?

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>>49749098
Why has nobody stopped to consider the sheer coolness of fighting your tyrant in a castle hurtling through space?
Or sports, perhaps.

>>49752616
>obliterated.
>Lit
>Writing
I learned something today.

>>49752778
>>49747224

Fucking with mortals is its own reward

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>>49744084
>the devil systematically bans all the advanced moves in chess.

>>49740436
>a certain tyrant's castle,
Did you use the castle's description, castle's name, his name, or a combination?

This is where you can get him, Kill the tyrant or buy it off him an and its not his castle anymore, and it's in space now, is it even still a castle?

Or like >>49746260 said, argue over the terms and conditions till the end of time, say you traded the IP not the physical copy, say your lawyer told you you had to suck his dick for a fair contract.

>>49740489
Hey, everyone botches rolls now and then.

>>49755243
Yeah, if your DM is fair you have a 1 in 20 chance of getting out of this no matter what.