>Muderhobo when you're not suppose to >Don't

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>>47544594
>WAHHH! STOP KILLING SHIT!
>Stop killing shit
>WAHHH! WHY AREN'T YOU KILLING SHIT?

Getting some mixed fucking signals here buddy.

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>tfw u make a filler mission specifically so your murderhobo-ish players can murderhobo their hearts out before the main mission

>and they play it way over-cautious and diplomatic

I have no one to blame but myself

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>>47544594
>mfw dm says he hates murderhoboing
>sets up the game so that murderhobo is the only option

I've had a GM that was sort of like that. He'd get frustrated when we kill people in good faith, angry when we try to guess if someone is important for what he wants and go out of our way to not kill them. He would demand we role-play instead of roll-play, but just we automatically lose after going to elaborate lengths to play to our character's strengths, because ultimately that would sometimes end up being a roll or equipment on a character sheet

What I'm getting at is the problem isn't the murderhobo concept so much as the shitty GM

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Having been there, I can only say GMs can only think their players do stuff to fuck with him.
>"The elf seems calm, and its willing to let you go if you apologize..."
>I roll to attack
> "The goblins are about to jump on you lot, with their weapons set to kill..."
> I try to use diplomacy to convince them all living beings are brothers

Really I'm not your highschool teacher, you don't get anything for pissing me off.

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>>47544594
>Kill the innkeeper because he overcharged
>Don't kill the skeletal legions because they seem like such nice gentlemen with their bright and constant smiles

>Kill the king because he sends you on stupid errands for magical items
>Don't kill the Dark Lord because he gives you magical items to stay out of his way

>Rape priestesses because they're 2pure
>Don't rape succubi because they're used goods

>>47545856
I would sort of have to agree with the King/Dark Lord one. The King sounds like a dick while my man DL sounds like a total bro

>>47545562
Because it's funny to fuck with you? Don't get anything from fucking with a teacher either it's just funny to be a troll.

>>47545978
>it's just funny to be a troll
since you like trolls so much, the trolls eat your legs

and nothing in this universe is wheelchair accessible

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>>47545978
But a-a-non I am just doing all of this for you its n-no fun to gm I just keep doing this to ma-make you all happy...

>>47545916

This, really. Honestly that sounds like a good campaign, where the party slowly turns evil because a dark lord is taking advantage of their myopic, selfish inner nature.

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>>47546084
>The King of Light promised you how much to kill me?
>Alright, I'll double that
>I'll even throw in these coupons for that new All You Can Eat restaurant I built in my capital
>You should try their spare rib orphan surprise, you'll never guess what the surprise is
>It's actually honey-mustard sauce with cayenne pepper
>There are no orphans in the orphan surprise
>the name was chosen to generate controversy ie. free media attention

>>47545856
How would you rape a succubus, anyway? I mean, is there any act that would count as rape that she wouldn't consent to?

>>47546157

>keep your friends rich and your enemies rich and wait to find out which is which

This Dark Lord is honestly shaping up to be pretty top tier.

>>47546170
I think after they realize you have some sort of protection from their life draining shit consent become a lot more contested

Or you're just fucking dead because you tried to fuck a demon. GG.

>>47545562
I think there's a gamist element in there. They're behaving counterintuitively because they're metagaming and dealing with each situation in a way they know you're not prepared for as a GM.

>This elf's trying to use diplomacy on us! Stab him!
>These goblins are trying to stab us! Use diplomacy on them!

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>>47546170
>is there any act that would count as rape that she wouldn't consent to?
Only the most horrible and deviant acts of debauchery.

Inviting her to join you on a nice steak dinner, having small talk, learning to know her better, walking her home, saying goodbye with a timid hug, inviting her to your house on a second date, cooking a rustic meal for her, learning about her dreams and ambitions, politely complimenting her on her beauty, offering to walk her home, meeting her again by pure coincidence while grocery shopping, joining her while bargain hunting, giving her a soft kiss on the cheek before going your own way, introducing her to your parents, meeting her parents, getting engaged, sealing your engagement with your first kiss on the mouth, preparing for a wedding, holding a grand wedding with both of your families, french kissing her for the first time, celebrating in a humble and homely manner, going on a honeymoon, having sex for the first time int he missionary position while holding hands with interlocked fingers and while gazing eachother lovingly in the eyes, telling her that you love her with all your heart, that you are hers and she is yours, raising a small family of half-demons together, passing on your morals and wisdom to the next generation, growing old together, outliving her, visiting her grave every sunday with a single specimen of her favorite flower, dying and being burried next to her grave

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>>47546320
This is a blue board you smut-mongering degenerate!

>>47546320
Have we gone full circle to the point where this can be considered just boring again? It feels kind of old hat to me

>>47545562
>Player rolls a 20 on diplomacy
>DM: The entire goblin tribe want to join your cause
>Players: Oh sweet! We have an army!

>one session later
>the goblins start stealing and thieving from the players in the middle of the night
>the goblins make a mess of every village and camp the party visits
>the goblins won't leave the players
>goblins install a democracy
>another goblin tribe joins the "party"
>goblin chieftain: "look at mees, wez party lead now"
>adventures accidentally create a warband and unite the warring goblin tribes with all the fancy magic items they stole from the players

Don't try to be diplomatic with creatures that you don't want around you.

>>47544594
Murder is an action
Murderhobo is a perspective

>>47544594
>...suppose to
Not
>...supposed to

See, this is how we know you're trolling. You're just bad at English.

>a city guard asks to see your passport
"Reach into my pocket? It's easier just to kill every last authority figure in this metropolis."

>a troll demands 100 gold to cross a bridge
"What a fine entrepreneur this young man is. Let's tip him an extra 10 gold."

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>>47546625
>The deceased city guard is replaced by a chaotic evil one
>He now rejects every singly entrant without even looking at that papers
>"Well, at least they're doing something about the illegal immigrant problem!"

>>47544934
Give me an example, because the situation you're describing doesn't otherwise exist.

>>47545092
I've always felt that most problems at a table are less a question of who is shitty, and more of a question of how badly the group communicates. And that puts the blame on both parties.

>>47546800
This was a game I had a few months back
>DM wants no murderhoboing
>"RP heavy game"
>Cool
>Start game
>NPC's have the personalty of a dull lemon
>Answer every question as short as possible
>Quests just take us from town to town with such urgency that party has no time for crafting
>Literally just going from one dungeon to the next

Sorry to say it sunny boy, but these situations do exist. It's called shit DMing.

>>47544803
Sounds like a shit DM who can't control the table.

>>47548010
Seriously, I bet he didn't even rape the largest of them during the first session to establish his dominance.

>>47550156
>>47550156
>not raping your players every session.
This hobby has gone to shit. AD&D was almost exclusvely about out-game rape. Gyrax even made a table for it.

>>47544684
You gotta be a dum dum if ya can't figure out when and when not to rip and tear.

>>47546170
>is there any act that would count as rape that she wouldn't consent to
Fuck her with a crucifix. She won't like it at all, and it would definitely count as rape.

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>>47550156
>When the big tough guy Palladin with 20 AC thinks he's invincible and leads the charge into a cave because "They're just goblins" and you bring him down to -1 hit points before he can even make a move because he didn't expect them to be smart enough to set up a proper ambush and the whole table starts to panic

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>>47550515
>be that party
>ask him desperately to be more careful
>dont be a dumbass
>that shit happens
>our face when pic related

>>47550592
lol what's that from?

>>47550619
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PFtr2n07BSM

>>47550492
Fun fact: there's a hentai artist that draws at on of vampire girls getting stuffed with crosses.

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>>47546157
This post is fantastic

>>47552890
Im not saying this is relevant to my interests.But I know somebody who would be interested.
Sauce plz?

>>47553127
>Im not saying this is relevant to my interests.But I know somebody who would be interested.
Really.

But sure, name's yozora.

>>47545856
>the party realizes that THEY are the true evil villains the entire time.

Sometimes you don't even need to write up the twist, the party does that for you.

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>>47553222
Nice trips.
Also, you remind me of that time the wizard turned out to be Chaotic Evil all along, and his player didn't realize it until the last few sessions.
>Serial arsonist
>No remorse
>Made a deal with two different warlock patrons for power
>Planned on kidnapping the BBEG's wife
>She gets the drop on him but spares him
>He comes back and kills her
>This fulfills the terms of a deal with a Chaotic Evil goddess, he gets a portal to Hell
>His archenemy mocks him for believing a Chaotic Evil being (she followed through on the bargain, just to point out how useless his deal was)
>Wizard realizes he's screwed and it's only a matter of time before this guy kills him
>Charm Person
>Counterspelled, now the warlock is pissed for being interrupted in the middle of his gloating time
>Hits wizard with an Eldritch Blast that knocks him into single digits
>Wizard's last spell slot, Wall of Flames
>Warlock takes the damage knowing the wizard dies next turn
>Player asks me to give him an out, he'll take anything
>Okay
>Wizard manages to make a teleportation circle out of his own blood, dying in the process (doesn't realize this because of where he is)
>Arrives in another hell, which belongs to the demon the BBEG served as a willing vessel for
>BBEG, who was just killed by the rest of the party, phases into existence right next to the wizard
>The wizard who immolated his wife
>The wizard who helped participate in killing him
>The wizard who can't cast spells any more
>The wizard who's on the BBEG's home turf
I don't know what the wizard was expecting. The demon talked the BBEG out of tearing this wizard spirit limb from spirit limb, and apparently in-character the wizard STILL thinks he can talk his way out of this without having it cost him eternal torture-or at all.
I'm straight up considering making him an NPC in a later campaign as a soul trapped within a gem the demon gives to one of his servants or something.

>>47544594
>Campaign thus far has been
>receive quest
>murderhobo there
>return for new quest
>Offer to DM in the same world to give usual DM a break
>Send them to three different areas with really planned out encounters
>Start the first fight on a frozen lake but ignore any options given other than stand in the same spot and attack over and over again
>Try to explore every part of the second area, refuse to fight anything
>third area they find a cave of fucking skeletons and try to befriend them, even while taking necrotic aoe damage

>>47546625
If the troll keeps the bridge in a good state there is nothing wrong with a toll.
Clearly the king thinks wasting coin in retarded bureaucracy is fine, so someone has to do it.

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>>47553426
That was beautiful.

>pic related. What I imagine the wizard's final thoughts were

>>47553426
Tell me. What do you think is better?

Enforcing a players chosen alignment
>i.e. "that doesn't sound very lawful...or good...

Or letting a player pick whatever and assigning a actual alignment based on actions

>>47554481
I usually enforce up until a certian point to of which the players have a choice of their own. It is hard for me to believe that a Lawful good person just instantly kills the bartender just because the "bartender was being an asshole."

>>47554481
The "are you sure".
If you wrote NG and attempt to engage a CE murderspree, I will have two steps.
Step one: "This goes against your described character, knock it off."
If you persist, then step two: "The town guards find your serial killer and catch him. He's hanged next morning and you are banned from my game."

>don't expect anything from players, just run the setting
>they are super car full the entire campaign
>murderhobo only once in the least expected moment, slaughtering entire caravan after traveling with them for days
>"they were bad guys"

>>47554444
good digits

>>47545562
But my character likes goblins! He spent years with a tribe of them, it's all in the backstory. Yes, I've had a player who came up with a backstory like that. He's a nice guy, and generally a pretty good player, but occasionally has moments of severe derp.

>>47550492
I dunno, desecrating holy artefacts sounds like a decent hobby to me.

>>47544594
>Reeks of a DM that sets problems in front of players and wants them to solve it HIS way.

We call that rail roading around here.

>>47544594
I've been there too, OP, I can understand your plight. I have an example of both in the very single situation, somewhat of a rare thing:

>A green dragon attacked an expedition that the son and daughter of a PC were working as guards for, expedition is now trapped in a abandoned castle
>Dragon is basically counting down from 1 hour for them to surrender the magical heirloom that the expedition leader possesses, or he'll just level the castle and then search the rubble
>Party sees dragon and goes "Oh fuck, a lawful evil dragon! Let's strike a deal with him!"
>Party enters the castle, murderhobos everyone except the PC's children (which are knocked unconscious), hands dragon the magic heirloom

Honestly I don't even know why I pretend the PCs are the good guys anymore.

>>47555325
4chan has this unique devotion to Contrarianism.

Almost every thread starts with someone rejecting/attacking/refuting/debating the OP, or simply some flippant response. The first post is almost uniformly made as a prayer to the Contrarianism gods, the gods that demand that no idea goes unopposed. In fact, the only reason anyone ever bothers to agree with an OP is actually because they disagree with the posts following it.

We've gotten to the point where our devotion to never giving the "expected answer" has lead us to the point where we can always expect the "unexpected answer."

This is not really a reference to this particular thread, but to most threads in general, a casual observation on what makes 4chan different from most other sites, where people feel the need to show their support and be part of a crowd rather than to figure out how to give a response no one else would give.

Were 4chan to be a player, they would always attack the princess and try to save the dragon.

>>47555667
>Were 4chan to be a player, they would always attack the princess and try to save the dragon.
Princess: 18 CHA if you're lucky
Ancient Red Wyrm: 26 CHA.
THE ANSWER IS CLEAR

>>47553127

What he didn't tell you is that they're all futa-vampires.

If it's the one I'm thinking of.

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>>47555755
>Ancient Red Wyrm: 26 CHA.
Would bang

>>47555755
And then beg the DM to let you play the half-dragon bastard child as your next character.

>>47555864
Yes you are thinking of the one I was thinking.
But hey, degeneratism to degeneratism.

>>47554156
There was a troll like that in the Witcher 2. Except that it became an alcoholic and stopped repairing the bridge.

>Polish games

>>47546485
Yeah, I feel as though we should have advantage to the point where the spoiler is a description of some really rough, passionate sex with maybe a little spanking, light bondage or anal or something.

Hand holding is starting to lose its shock value.

>>47545562
>attacking an enemy who has let his guard down
>trying to stop a fight before it happens

I see nothing wrong here.

>>47555667
No, fuck you. Just because 4chan tends to be contrarian, doesn't mean the answers are all binary. I don't have to chose either the princess or the dragon - I don't even have to try and rescue them. I could kill them both, I could fuck off, I could trick the dragon into killing the princess and then kill the dragon for reward money.

>>47556726
That's some next level contrarianism right there.

>play level 15 dungeonbrawler one-shot for DM's birthday
>have a 40 goblin encounter so that everyone can ness around a bit and properly play around with their characters
>group's "That guy" gets highest initiative, runs in and casts Circle of Death at level 8, killing every single goblin and leaving their boss with 6 HP
>ends up with over 700 HP because of Dark One's Blessing
>5 of our 8 party members end up casting less than 3 spells the entire rest of the adventure with the warlock pretty much soloing everything

It may have been a "just hack your way through it" adventure bit fucking hell, why would he think it necessary to kill everything at once in the first, relaxed fun encounter?

>>47555667
>>47555755
It's funny, because there was an evil princess in the setting I write that seduced a red dragon and then exploited her status as pregnant with the child of a red dragon to have her brother killed and become queen.
Now that I think about it, my setting lore is REALLY fucked up.

>>47556983
Eh, I can understand the urge, when one sees the chance to use their cool spell on the ideal crowd of targets, to go for it.

>>47557177
Still, it was the only spell he casted all game since he ended up just bum-rushing in with his pact weapon from that point onwards, always having higher initiative than any of our casters who all ended up doing absolutely nothing all game except for one-shotting the final boss due to having literally every spell above level 3 still available.

He also threw a huge fit when I wanted to throw caution to the wind and blast an entire corridor with him, 2 other party members and 7 enemies with my Prismatic Spray because "muh damage", even though the otherd with normal HP said that they'd be fine if he wouldn't be a bitch about it.

>>47546157
Truly a master of evil.