Due to a weird genetic mutation your children will be immortal

Adopt.

>>44069595
Donate shit tons of sperm.
Impregnate as many women as possible.
Create a new race of immortal super humans that will inherit the earth.

>>44069595
Seeing as it is a weird and random genetic mutation, we would have absolutely no way of knowing until our first child turned 35, and even then for a few years after when we realize that they aren't aging.

So there is absolutely no way we could prepare for it, and we could not reasonably know it was happening.

>>44069595
What kind of immortality? True Immortality?

start some trust funds.

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>>44069595

Nothing, I'm both gay and a total NEET, so the chances of me actually having children are statistically improbable.

>>44069595
Activate Kruger

prepare them by having them dedicate their life to a craft or skill. though that's rather overbearing but i'd at least try to get them into some art/music since they're gonna be immortal and every good immortal can play an instrument or paint

>>44070451
As long as they don't get murdered or in a rekt then they will live forever.

>>44070601
Why not teach them something useful?

>>44070614
i'm afraid i don't know of any useful skills beyond art or entertainment of some sort

>>44069858
This.

Except I raise one myself that is fully educated as to their nature and the nature of their siblings. They are the chosen one.

>>44070494
>I'm a total NEET, so beta and NEET with daddy issues I want a strong man to fuck me in the ass like daddy never did, because he knew i was a mistake and a failure
or
>I'm a total NEET, that is so beta and afraid of women because le epin /pol/ memerinos that he wants to fuck a guy in drag

>>44070776
I've got no interest in this interaction but that thar is what the professionals call projection.

>>44070614
What's the point. You're immortal. At some point you'll master every skill.

I will teach them to not be a dick. Some people go their whole lives without knowing how to do it.

>>44070776

Uh, what? Neither.

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>>44071043
>>44071058
Tell me about your dads anon?
Why they never loved you?
Why do you want to fuck your mom anon?
Do you shitpost because it reminds you of your dad's dick?

>>44071294
>Your dad's dick was famously called the Shit Post

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>>44069595

Father many sons (oh, and daughters too I guess, if that can't be avoided), apologize to the good lord for complaining about all the flaws he dumped on my form prior to that, and teach them responsibility, defending the weak, compassion, teamwork, and martial to the best of my ability so they can use their knowledge and the skills they will no doubt build for the good of the future whilst also to the betterment of themselves. Also dress them all in a distinct outfit and try to implement unique cultural customs: I've always wanted to be a whole ethnicity unto myself!

>>44069595
Life isn't a single event with a one-off trick for success, and neither is identity or self. These things are dynamic and malleable. Part of maturing is realizing this.

If they haven't figured out how to adapt by 35, even if I wasn't around at all, there's not much I'd be able to do for them anyway.

>>44070776
We're talking adverts on the moon level of projection, boss. Relax a little.

Do some freaky Friday shit to steal their immortality

>>44069858
>>44070773
What these bros said plus see about getting some sperm into some kind of vault for future use and look into getting it cloned. If I've got the key to immortality I'm not letting it go.

>>44070773
I would watch that movie

Proceed to never have children, because I'd die having ruined my relationship with my family due to being bitter and jealous.