Guys! Guys. This girl I know just sent me this pic and I don't

you are a heretic

gross

>>33593666
Dude, have a little pride. "Gue'la" is a derogatory term. It's dehumanizing.

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send this back

>Sketchy lines
pls no

>>33593666
>carefully not showing her waistline

Confirmed for fat. Delete from contacts list. Stick to the Air caste next time.

Well I think she's d-t-f mate. I'll distract the commisar for you ok, I'll tell him the Ratling's are the ones shooting his hat off and the Techpreist is why his bolter is sticky

>>33593666
>Tau and gue'la aren't supposed to mingle. You know, socially.
Then how do you know her, faggot?

>>33593714
it is his majesty Leto Atreides!

>>33593782
Really? Because it looks like the world's happiest foreskin.

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>>33593666
Nyaaar, a common mistake. The Tau do not forbid friendship or even copulation between castes or races, yes, simply interbreeding. Understandable, yes, that they would want to keep their bloodlines pure and strong. A thousand thousand years of careful shaping should not be undone over frivolous romance, yeees. However, Tau females cannot bear human young, nor can they lay kroot eggs. More simplistic Tau may think odd of her and you, but it is not forbidden.

Source: This one shared meals with a gorgeous Shas'la in the taking of Yuurax Primus.

>>33593781
Professionally! I work down at the docks. You know, running loaders and forklifts, that kind of thing. She's one of the engineers.

>>33593836
>>33593827
You heard the porcupine, get a box of condoms and take a dip in the pie.

>>33593827
>shared meals
You ate her brain, didn't you.

>>33593666
What caste is she?

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>>33593908
Where'd you think it got such magnificent tits?

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>>33593827
>shared meals

>>33593908
>>33593931
>>33593962
Honestly, you guys. They gave each other oral.

>>33593666
>gue'la
You mean gue'vesa, idiot. Guela haven't been integrated into the T'au yet

>>33593991
>>gue'la
>>You mean gue'vesa
Gue'vesa are specifically human auxiliary units attached to Tau fire cadres. Gue'la is the Tau word for human. If you're going to be an insufferable autist about inconsequential specificity, at least be right about it.

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>>33593908
>>33593931
I once started to write a fanfic abut a Kroot female who got employment 'disposing' of a pimps sex-addict whores.

She was a muscular girl but then developed tits and nymphomania because of the eating of the sexaddicts, and started getting involved in human gangbangs.

I then wept.

>>33594058
You realize that you have a responsibility - no, a duty - to post that story, now.

>>33594058
Why would a pimp want to get rid of sex-addicted whores?

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>>33593666

>>33594123
Because they weren't bothering to collect the money?

>>33594123
Slaanesh corruption incoming.

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>>33594140
I mean, I hear you say that...

>>33594113
It's long gone. Only a few scraps remain in my mental vault.

>>33594123
They started having sex for drugs, not money. Also some of them had been worn loose.

>>33593908
>>33593931
>>33593962
>>33594058
NYAAAAR

This one weeps for the empire! How can we be a brotherhood with such blatant ignorance? YES. Kroot such as this one eat people. BUT NOT JUST PEOPLE. Do you think I could survive just eating people? Do you think!? THINK.

We shared cup noodles as we watched Imperial ships descend from the skies in fire. We ate standard rations in the trenches of Ulamar marsh. Indeed, I did cook for her a native Kessik rat after we fended off the 34th push, whilst this one ate his raw. But no, she never ate a person!

>>33594123
In my head I'm seeing a drug addict like scenario.
Drug addicts off sex for crack, so sex addicts start offering sex for sex. Not a very good business model for pimps.

>>33593666


>Human-on-Tau violence was not unknown, with a notable example being when a man stylising himself as an Imperial Commissar murdered two Earth Caste workers in front of a mob of humans and then incited them to riot. Such people are not referred to as Gue'vesa by the Tau, instead recieving the derogatory name Gue'la, which translates simply as "human."

>>33594146
Then he should switch to an upfront collection model with him performing the transaction. He could also switch them to brothel work or stage shows. Really there are a host of better options than paying a Xenos to kill and eat them.

>>33594162
>"Bitch, I don't care how many dicks are growin' out yo nipples, I best be seeing thrones in my hand or I'll toss your ass down the rad sump and let the mutants have a go."

>>33594229
Suuure you did. And the tau suffered a tragic accident that just coincidentally left no body.

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Consorting with xenos? That's some heretical shit right there brother.

>>33594385
This isn't any trench at all. This is my house!

>>33594685
Then I guess the inquisition caught onto your shit.
I'm sure they'll give you a 5 second head start though.

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>>33594685
And that's not a baneblade, that's my wife!

>>33594733
It's less funny when a tech adept says that.

>>33594769
Because it's true? That makes it funnier, fag.

I want to be balls deep inside a tau girls asshole while I ejaculate

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>>33594685
Give me and my spade 30 seconds and we'll see if you can say that again.

>>33594934
Because you're going to trench my living room? Fuck, make yourselves useful and go dig up that stump in the back, instead.

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>>33594859
...explain.

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Did someone say forbidden alien sex?

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>>33595047

>>33594984
My penis, tau butt, orgasm

>>33593922
Still requesting an answer to this question.
Looks like Earth Caste.

>>33594984
Man, do I love dudes with guns riding things. Like, I generally hate knights and cavalry charges and lances and such, but MAN do I like light cavalry scouts/skirmishers.

>>33595201
Well, >>33593836 said that she's an engineer down at the cargo docks so Earth Caste makes most sense. Plus, dem titays.

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>>33595359
They're fat girl tittays.
So you're the indiscriminate guy on the team, huh? That's cool man, someone's gotta do it, and as my master always says:
"The worst pussy I ever got was still pretty damn good."

>>33594984
*Whirrrrr*
I believe the heretical abhoration stated that he would experience sexual pleasure to the point of ejactulation after inserting his reproductive organ into the xeno female's azure waste disposal ring.

>>33595497

Wow we went there....

This thread needs to be archived!

>>33595635

http://4archive.org/tg/thread/33593666

Haha!

>>33593666
Are you a rogue trader or working for a rogue trader? Then go ahead and tap that Xeno booty.
If not, then tough luck buddy. Hope the Inquisition doesn't fuck you too hard.

So, mental image recap here.
This bro >>33593666 gets that picture and posts it on the galactic net for advice from his "friends" online. He is naturally called a heretic and told to respond with dick pics.
He explains a few things, and suddenly >>33593827 this random ass kroot steps into his living room and sits down to tell him a story about the time (she?) totallydidn'teat/eatoutaShas'la.
Next a random dude walks in and tells the two of them about the porn story, everyone demands to see it, he blushes and hides the key to his secret smut dungeon.
>>33594385 Suddenly fucking Krieg bros just show up and yell about him being a heretic and start digging up his living room because they can't live outside a trench without going through withdrawls.
Random /b/tard walks in and says "I want to a tau", everyone ignores him except the very confused kroot.
Then a daemonette shows up on this guy's couch and starts rubbing herself while her (handler?) from the inquisition yanks on her leash to make her behave.
Then a dancing dick appears just before a cyclonic torpedo slams into the house to wipe out what is probably the most concentrated heresy since Horus.

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>>33595497

>>33595802
kingofthreads.png

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This thread is why I fucking hate every single one of you degeneratw faggots. WHAT KIND OF FUCKING SHIT IS THAT WANTING TO FUCK SOME BLUE ASS COMMUNIST WHORE. I WILL RIP HER HEAD OFF AND BEAT YOU TO DEATH WITH IT WHILE YOU CRY LIKE A FUCKING BITCH.


BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE

>>33596243
>I WILL RIP HER HEAD OFF AND BEAT YOU TO DEATH WITH IT WHILE YOU CRY LIKE A FUCKING BITCH.
You seem in a rather good mood today, that's a pretty tame threat.

>>33596272
He finally found his fuzzy bunny slippers, he can't make brutal threats while his toes bask in cotton bliss now can he?

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>>33596243
Oh yeah? Well I'll spread your butt cheeks and blow into them until you cough

>>33593701
>It's dehumanizing.
tau aren't humans

>>33596987
Dehumanizing as in "you are just an animal and nothing more", dingus.

Tau seek to dehumanize humans! News at eleven.

>>33597012
I know what the word mean
you should use depersonifying instead, don't be so ethnocentric

>>33597051
It's a human that said it.

>>33597051
Well when it's directed toward a human, it's absolutely correct and appropriate.

>>33597051
I bet you think "inalienable human rights" is a racist phrase, too.

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>>33597155
Of course it is.

>>33593666
Wait - how'd she send this pic to you? You just said you knew her professionally. How's that jump to a vox-channel and a pict-feed?

Is she abusing her powers as an engineer where you work to steal your personal information?

>>33597086
Anthropocentric bags of dicks...

>>33597214
I don't know! That's why it's gotta be a mistake, right?

>>33597271
Either that or you have a stalker. Wait, aren't you dead from cyclonic torpedo strikes?

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>>33597271
Well, if she used her resources to find you, I doubt it was a mistake.
Put the D in her V or H or whatever the fuck the blueberries call it and accept Slaanesh already you fucking prude.

>>33597305
...no?

>>33597155
>I bet you think "inalienable human rights" is a racist phrase, too.
I bet you think xenos should all be purged

Why is heresy so hot?

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>>33597385
Because it's the one true path Anon. Will you cross over with us?

>>33597321
It's a necron! Get him!

>>33593962
explain pls

>>33597434
>sucky sucky licky licky love you long time

>>33593666
give her the D

>>33597385
4chan artists draw it that way

the canon depiction are actually quite revolting

>>33597434
Kroot eat people.

>>33597346
Get a load of this heretic.

>>33597271
Look, dude...has she made any other sort of...advances? Said anything weird to you? She might have tried it in a more Tau fashion - it's not like she's Water Caste, she might not know how humans do things.

>>33593666
Hey man, Steel Legionare here.
While I will call you a heretic, I will also call you a lucky bastard.
Tell her she would make a good model or somthing. Never know about those Tau girls man.

>>33597271
Dude you got a stalker Tau.

Rolled 9

>>33597582
This, tell her she would be perfect for a calender.

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Would a basic kroot have a cloaca or not?

>>33597625
Are they birds, reptiles or amphibians?

>>33597647
Yes.

>>33597656
Then yes.

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>>33597647
>>33597656
>>33597668
>you will never kidnap supermodels and feed them to your kroot girlfriend until she grows a separate vagina and anus

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>>33597625

Depends?

Does it having one or not dampen your boner? because really, its 40k, sense is a dead idea.

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You! Original Poster man! I hear your problem, and I have good advice to give!

First, Tau women are beautiful. It is no shame. I have fought Tau! They fight well! Like true sons of Vostroya, only not true sons of Vostroya! The women are of curvy stature and of friendly nature, eeeh?

Second, you must grow mustache! No woman shall respect a man without a mustache! You might as well say that you are not interested in woman, eeh? Say that her picture she sent has meant nothing! It must be long and beautiful, like mine is! The picture is related!

Tell the Kroot fuckers to get out of the thread

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>>33597798
GTFO faggot.

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>>33597625
What I want to know is whether or not she'd OM NOM NOM me in the heat of the moment.

>>33597792
But Guardsman Cevyk, Tau lack bodily hair of any kind. What if my 'stache frightens her?

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>>33597792
The Emperor didn't have a mustache.

You saying the Emperor is less of a man than you?

COMMISSAR, COMMISSAR!

>>33597843
>heat of the moment

Anon, she'd om nom you period.

>>33597798
No! No no! That is the advice that is wrong to give, and you must give it right! I shall tell you:

The Tau women do appreciate it when you are nice to alien ladies, yes? You do not have to want them. You be polite, though. You talk about weather, how extraordinary it is to see sky that is not soot and smoke. The Tau woman will love you, think you part of goods that are greater. Cevyk knows his way around the alien women, eeh?

>>33597836
/d/
Go

>>33597890
>trying to assist heresy

burn this fucker

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>>33597858
Your mustache would frighten girl? Aaah, yes, I see - Tau do not grow mustache, so she would be of the fright of a real man! I understand, yes! Good man! You do not grow mustache! But remember not to throw away your manhood so easily for girl all the time, eeeh?

>>33597861
Everyone knows that the Emperor had a beautiful mustache, like a proud son of Vostroya! It is simply not seen, for he was in the habit to shave it off so none would feel ashamed to have their mustaches seen in comparison to his own.

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>>33594733

>>33597939
Tell us about the time the Emperor participated in no-shave november comrade!

>>33597889
Who is this Anon fellow? I am Laz, proud Guardsman of the Emperor

>>33597992
Obviously not if you're considering fornicating with xenos filth.

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>>33597890

>>33597939
We need a story about Cevyk giving dating advice to Guardsman.

>>33594733

Stattler: There's nothing like a good blueberry post
Waldorf: And this is nothing like one!
Both: WO-HOhoHOho

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>>33598044
Cevyk back me up here!

>>33597985
You wish Cevyk tell this tell? Cevyk will tell this tale, yes! It is a grand story.

Once, it was November, and therefore it was tradition for every man to not shave for the whole of the month, yes? Many a man bore a proud stubble upon chin, grew a short beard. Even some of the primarchs managed, though most could not facial hair at all, unlike their father.

Anyway, the time came for the Emperor to meet with his sons, for party of birth. Forget who - Russ? Ferrus Manus? Forget who. Emperor comes to meet with his sons, and they are excited to see father! But they cannot see father! They see large pile of long, black hair stretching about the doorway!

The primarchs cried out, "Where is father?! Where is the Emperor!" but none could find him, for they only found but more hair. Finally, the Emperor made grand sacrifice for his sons, breaking time honored tradition of the no shaving of November. He raised his mighty sword and slashed his own beautiful beard and mustache in twain, so sons could see, yes, Father was there! His beard had grown so long as to hide him from sight!

From that day forward, it was decided that only the manliest of men could bear facial hair for long in the Emperor's Imperium, and that is for why the Sons of Vostroya bear such proud and excellent mustaches!

It is good story, yes? I need rahzvod.

>>33598060
Spoiler:It ends with the inquisition killing them

That feel when no Tau girls to defect for.

Rolled 61

>>33598128
I laughed heartily brother, I thank you for the tale.

>>33598148
Well, theres the Eldar chicks and then theres Slaanesh's daemons, but I'm pretty sure you wouldn't go after something that can physically corrupt you.

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>>33598105
Strange anonymous gentleman, do not be so unkind to good comrade Laz! He has proven himself proud son of Vostroya, if not by birth, by fact he can drink half bottle of rahzvod before passing out!

But Tau women, Tau women...if you had but spent time in the fringe of the East, you would understand, yes! The Emperor does forgive me! I only make more proud firstborn sons of Vostroya with the humanity of the Imperium!

Rolled 86

>>33598228
It is quite alright brother.
There is nothing wrong with enjoying the "entertainment" of the locals in war.

>>33598228
>The Emperor does forgive me!
No he doesn't, xenophile filth.

>>33598218
Was Eldar prisoner for year.
Eldar women make me do of the dancing. I never was dancer like grand vater was.

Would never touch daemon woman. Look painfull.

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>>33598228
Thank dude.

And there's nothing inherently xenos women. Just don't give them your essence. Always dny them your essence.

>>33598338
Oh darling, we're not so bad if you just give it a little try.

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>This thread

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>>33598338
Do not be touching the daemon woman! Once, I was caught in bad place. Hive Glarskill, daemon woman was toying with Cevyk! She came up close...reached out to stroke my cheek...And tugged on my mustache, ruining the carefully arranged hairs! Well, like any good son of Vostroya, I was enraged, and hacked her down with my chainsword! She did pay for the insult to the good son of Vostroya!

On Vostorya, we say only three people can meddle with your mustache - the Emperor, your woman and your mother.

>>33598403
the inquisition would have a stroke.
good

>>33598376
To quote a cigar chomping, heretical motherfucker, Id go tell Slaanesh to fuck herself with a chainsword but she would just take that as a challenge.

>>33598338
Right, now when you're dealing with Eldar chicks, keep in mind that there is a moderate chance for the Eldar to become a mother if you fuck it. This can be a bad thing initially, but they payoff is that you might have a powerful psychic kid.

As for daemonettes, some of them will have man bits as well as lady bits. Don't be turned off by the sight for it can still be fucked like a hot chick. If you're really lucky, you can have it manifest you're fetishes to make the intercourse interesting.

>>33598469
Gah I misspelled "your" near the bit about fetishes!

>>33598469
I....might have gone down that road.
What should I expect?

>>33598547
Happy Father's Day.

>>33598564
Fuck...

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>>33598547
Welcome to the service of Slaanesh, mortal!

>>33598469
Feh, Eldar women! They do not give, they take! They do not care for a proud son of Vostroya at all, and I have never seen one of their race, for all their pride, prove they can properly wax a mustache. They can be beautiful, but there is no point to chasing them, for they shall never let you catch them - except in the rare circumstance that they so will it!

At least with girl that is Tau, I can talk to her. "How are you doing? How was your day? Why do your kind not handle even a single sip of rahzvod? Is your skin blue because it is like the sky, and would it be grey if I showed you the towering factories of my home?"

>>33598599
I mean the Eldar...
Child support is going to be a bitch isnt it?

>>33598547
Which one, the Eldar road or the Daemonette one? If you're on the Eldar road and accidentally get one pregnant, relax! Just help her raise the kid and it'll pay off in the long run. For the Daemonette path, also relax. Unless you're doing rituals and other horrendous shit, keep the relation under control but don't be afraid to experiment! Only real problem would be your neighbors and the Arbites. Other than that, you can fuck her without getting her knocked up or transferring STDs to you.

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>>33598608
Merciful Emperor above! To think a Guardsman of the Firstborn would forget his own name! My apologizes, dear friends - the rahzvod flows more freely than to which I am used!

....Yeah, I think OP will never solve his Tau problem.

Heh.

>>33598768
The inquisition must be loving that all these heretics are outing themselves, though.

>>33598638
It shouldn't cost a lot as long as you keep him/her safe from angry Eldar folks. Another bright side to this is that you can have a kid that has the positive traits of both species while only having few of the negative traits of both species.

>>33598789
Seems rather coincidental that all these heretics are showing up...as if someone had intended to flush them out using this thread as bait...

Naaaah.

>>33598789
The Inquisition can kiss my radiated ass.
Im hiding behind twelve webway gates.

>>33598851
Friend! Sorry to intrude upon your besiegement, but I see you are busy hiding behind these gates without the proper supplies!

>>33598880
Yes komeradden, bring recaffe and will will hide out in the webway with Harlequinns!
Also I am low on rahzvod, bring more of the vostroyian trinken!

>>33598880
He's got the supplies, man. After all, he might just be on a Craftworld. Ever stop to think about how difficult it is to raid one of those? Me, I'm in a fuck-off part of a segmentum on a rock.

>>33598834
>yfw this entire thread was an inquisitorial sting operation

We should toast marshmallows over the extra crispy corpses of all these heretics.

>>33598963
I hear the eastern fringe is nice this time of year.

>>33598926
That is of course what I have brought, comerade! What sort of man could last for years hiding from Inquisitorial operatives, without a proper supply of alcohol? And recaff! Bah! You must try ohxolosvennoy! It keeps factory workers back on Vostroya working doubletime!

>>33598963
...A rock, or The Rock? What are you doing on such a place?

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>>33598964
Good thing I brought my apron for this cleansing!

CLEANSE PURGE KILL!

>>33595447
I prefer the old daemonettes with two tits and less penis.

>>33599022
Not THE Rock aka Caliban. If I were on it, would I be posting advice on Eldar and Daemonettes?

>>33599017
Yes, it's quite peaceful during the periods of time where there's no battle going on around you.

>>33597051
Can someone direct this tumblrfag back to /b/?

>>33599051
>>33598964
I detect these are from the same Inquisitor.

>>33599051
Hey, hey Iron Chief! Are you going to fry me up some eggs or something? I don't think you know what's at STEAK here, ha haaa!

>>33599083
I have some of those. Sweet models. I still catch myself oggling the asses sometimes.

>>33599083
But anon, they always had penis.

>>33593666
Enjoy the Arbites coming by your hab-block, xeno-lover

>>33599137
It's pretty heavily implied that he's one of the humans stuck in the Tau Empire. Chill out, dude.

Isnt it true eldar require multiple sessions before pregnancy?

>>33599134
Only because you put them there. STOP ABUSING THE GREENSTUFF!!!

>>33599083
Hence why I mention that sometimes they have man bits along with lady bits. Many daemonettes keep to the old timey two breasts no dick style.

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>>33599131
I'll grind your meat, heretic.

>>33599126
Obviously your heresy has addled your senses. It won't matter for much longer, regardless.

>>33599167
Yeah, sure, that's what they all say. "Oh, I was TOTALLY conscripted to help the Blues. I didn't MEAN to shoot at your friends."

Yeah, naw, this guy's just a xeno-lover, just like all the other blue-sympathizers out there.

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>>33599199
>>33599199
Are you suuuuure you aren't interested in a little fun instead of cutting up these mortals?

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>>33597412
Best and only good daemonette

Havent even seen ND in this thread yet

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Does everything have to be about sex, /tg/?

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>>33599242
FUN IS HERESY! HERESY BEGETS PUNISHMENT, PUNISHMENT IS DEATH!

>>33599332
It's midnight, what do you think?

>>33599387
Midnight for you maybe. Two fer me.

>>33599412
Go to bed eastfag.

>>33599427
You can't make me
I have insomnia

>>33597625
I think I read somewhere that they spit up their young in clutches. Also in the Tau Codex that nobody reads the Kroot are stated as Avian

>>33599455
I know the pain.
See you when the sun comes up.

>>33599427
Midwest fag here.
Who is still awake?

>>33599504
mountainfag here

>>33593666
You think tau are attractive. I think the best course of action would be to go home and rethink your life.

>>33599504
Brother of the plains.

...It feels evil to break character, but fuckit. Goin' to bed soon anyway.

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I'm hitting the sack. Se you later comrades.

>>33599558
Night dude, will do this another time.

Yes, we all have the crush your enemies part down, but from what I learned from rogue traders is that there are many more ways of crushing the enemy's just just in body, but in mind and soul as well.
You must capture the enemy and keep them alive. Then you must take their women and "crush" them over and over until they know the true power of humanity's "cannon" and lust after it's power. Make sure the others watch as their own serve humanity. This is a supposed ancient practice called NTR .

>>33599169
>mfw my gilfriend for ten years is really an Eldar Outcast on vacation pretending to be human.
I use to live a simple life but now on run from Inquisition... why cant I have a normal life...

>>33597625
Kroot don't have cloacas, as they excrete their waste through their skin. Kroot digetsive system is very efficient and doesn't produce solid waste. Instead they excrete a think, fould-smelling oil through their skin. They also use it to mark their territory.

Kroot mate by the male "sweating" their sperm in the same way, which they rub on the female's back. They give birth to live young, which they vomit out (as they have no cloaca or vagina, the mouth is the only hole the baby can exit from).

The source for this is an old WD articlae about Kroot biology back when the Tau firts came out. Or it might have been xenology, or likely both. Strangely we know far more about Kroot biology thna of the Tau.

>>33600289
>Kroot don't have cloacas, as they excrete their waste through their skin.

I always figured they just puked up a pellet.

>>33593714
Ah yes, the God Emperor of Mankind.

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>>33593666

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>>33599262
Eversor and daemonette/ dark elf

The fucked up version of Love can Bloom

>>33600656
>4) put it in the pooper

>>33600563
You're thinking Felinids.

>>33600693
Does Tau even have a pooper?

>>33600701
owls?

>>33600289
>ey bby want a backrub
>"Wh-what are you asking so suddenly!"

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>>33600706
If they don't, they will soon.

>>33600289
In Xenology the Kroot was said to have human analogue genitalia tucked away between abdominal plates.

I guess it depends on the kindred, seeing that traits between kindreds are often spread through consumption of flesh, rather than mating. Then gain, how hard would it be to squeeze on off on your mate's back and rub it in?

>>33597693
>Self building Monstegirl waifu aliens

>Feed them all the aspects of your fetish to make the pefect being


Who the hell needs to look upon Slaanesh anyway?

It's not like it's possible to be a furry and human at the same time anyway, checkmate ruinous powers

>>33598469
Don't forget one of the known hald elf kids is actually an ultramarine.

Seriously, we should just fuck the eldar into alliance, nothing could possibly go wrong.

>>33599051
If you're so pure, why can't your dick cleanse Xenos filth alone?

Or are you saying you have to rely on big guns to gun down heresy and not the will and power of the prime human form, given he emperors blessing?

>>33601473
That'd be his fists.

>>33601501
So good with his hands alone eh?

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this thread

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>Suddenly, Rippers flood the bedroom!

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>>33601568
Heretics gonna heresy.

>>33601584
Slaanesh is awesome.

>>33601616
You know what is going to suck?

The new 40K game on the way.

I'd give anything for the TF2 team (Save for hats and accessories) to do the Game instead

Imagine a halloween even where we get A Fucking Doomrider headless horsemann tier bossfight, complete with kickass metal that plays when he spawns on the map to wreck shit, driving up walls and shredding everything up as everyone clambers to kill him for achievements and holiday event gear, everyone trying to get nightlord tech and other halloween goodies.

Hell, I'd kill for Doomrider Fluff where he can turn any vehicle he touches into a warp engine ghost rider style
>Gets a Black ship

>Fires himself in a Warp dust canon into the enemy on his Ride screaming extreme

>Noise marines and cultists rocking out as Slaanesh purple haze fills the chaos torn space

>>33594058
Not how it works. Kroot genetic assimilation is not only a group effort, but happens over generations. They are not Megaman.

>>33601658
>Necrns capture a Kroot, Turn it into a Pariah
>Is now Megaman
>Enemies are blood ravens and Trayzen the infinite for stealing powers by eating them

>>33601651
>I'd give anything for the TF2 team (Save for hats and accessories) to do the Game instead
You'd get pauldrons and purity seals instead.

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>>33601658
It was fucking porn, ya asshat.

>>33601671
I approve of this.

>>33601684
Lots of people actually think that's how it works. I can't begin to count how many Rogue Trader players I've had that have tried to abuse the superpowers they thought they had.

Then I stopped recruiting from /tg/ and the problem went away.

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>>33601674
And choices of Armour, and relics to use, etc...

You'd even be able to make your own chapters (guilds) with enough members write fluff etc...

Rewards for the Halloween event would be Doomriders disembodied bantering head, his sword, his bike, flaming head SFX, and a Doom rider vehicle fumes SFX.

I know the bloody Alpha Legion youtube crowd would have a field day with stuff like that

>CREEEEED Prophunt

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>this entire thread

>>33601738
>Creed Prophunt

*clink!*
Was that a can that just moved?
*can explodes to reveal a Baneblade.*

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>>33601765
>this entire thread

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>>33601875

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>>33601886

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>>33601886

>>33601848
>Nurgle Zombie maps

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>>33601914

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>>33601920

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>>33601937

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>>33601942

>>33601957
The things people do to their frying pans.

>>33601848
>>33601875
>>33601886
>>33601898
>>33601914
>>33601918
>>33601920
>>33601937
>>33601942
>>33601957
>>33601974
>>33601979
Aaaand you ruined the thread.
Great work, assholes.

>>33601993
But I didn't do anything.

>>33601993
>ruined an already shit thread

>>33601993
There was nothing to ruin. If you want to talk about blue tits with fa/tg/uy peers, I suggest that you try the weekend smut threads.

>>33601993
Are you saying that this thread wasn't shit to begin with?

>>33602003
>>33602005
>>33602031
>>33602041
This confirms it, /tg/ has gone to shit.

>>33595074
My dream is to play a Rogue Trader and build a Xenos harem during my adventures.

>>33602075
>one thread didn't go the way I wanted and instead of bringing it back on track I'm gonna whine about it
>f-fucking, /tg/, y-you changed!

/tg/ was always shit. You just have to learn ro make your own fun.

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>>33593773
HE DID WHAT TO MY GUN!

>>33594229
Warning: Hanar detected
Please verify

>>33596243
GOLD FOR THE GOLD THRONE!

>>33600665
one that I would read

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>>33597861
WHAT FAGGOT!?!

>>33602401
Your hat is dumb!

>>33602401
Private Anon said you don't even praise the Emperor and something about a threeway with and an Eldar and tau?

>>33603725
And a line of coke off an underage daemonette's ass.

>>33603978
Damn.
That was out of line private.
Get out of here before he murder the entire sector

>>33604027
>Telling him to run away from the commissar he just insulted.
But anon, that's when his aim instantly gets better than a scout!

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>>33597625
I for one wish more ppl would post non-daemonet xenos bitches. There is an over-saturation of daemonet tits in the warhammer 40k rule 34

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>>33594182
THaaaaaaaaaats a nipple

>>33604225
I'm sure you're positively titillated.

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>>33604254

>>33596272
Most khornates can't write threats at all, they break their keyboards.

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>>33601738

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This thread ams dildoes. Nots a singles GMILFs.

>>33604225
PROMOTIONS!!!

>>33604644
>Nots a singles GMILFs
For some reason, no one loves eldar.

>>33605043
>For the record, I tried.

Not nearly enough deliciously heretical blue alien babes in this thread. Or even blue xeno hunks.

>>33604666
Bony, selfish, incredibly demanding harridans. Would rather stick it in an ork.

>>33605190
>mistaking this heresy thread for a blueberry thread
Look at this fag

>>33593666
Nice tits, but 4/10 face at best. Not worth getting *BLAM*ed over.

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>>33605196
>Bony

>>33605219
>child_querying_why_the_two_options_given_are_mutually_exclusive.jpeg

>>33605290
>Quarian tier hips
Damn showty yo body is bangin.

>>33605290
>shows power armor
>thinks it disproves anything

That's what eldar want to look like, but never do.

>>33605319
What's filling the boobplates?

>>33605190
Some drawfag in the Scraplootas thread made one up: >>>/i/422367

>>33605345
Balloons filled with extremely fine sand?

>>33605345
Wraithbone.

BTW, that pic is a dude. Well, as much of a dude as eldar can be.

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>>33605367
>BTW, that pic is a dude
Sure it is. Whatever you prefer, man.

>>33605378
>doesn't know the paths are gender neutral

>>33605357
Salty Coins

>>33604647
EVERYBODY'S GETTIN' PROMOTED

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>>33605393
>gender neutral
>still insisting it's a dude

>>33605548
sorry to burst your heretical little bubble

>>33605395
And Milk.

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>>33594162
YES!!!

>>33594297
More likely the whores are dying on him due to Drug Overdoses...

>>33594733
"Demolisher? I barely KNOW her!"

>>33595047
>>33595074
But is it the PUREST of love?

>>33595447
>>33599083
>I prefer the old daemonettes with two tits and less penis.
Same...

>>33597319
...Why not mesh Tentacle Vaginas?

>>33597385
>>33597412
Because we have a nigh monopoly on tits!

>>33597897
No.

>>33598218
...You make it sound like you don't want an awesome rack and a tentacle vagina...

>>33598448
>tell Slaanesh to fuck herself with a chainsword but she would just take that as a challenge
>Implying Mother hasn't already mastered Anal, Vaginal, and Urethral Chainsword Fencing...

>>33598789
>>33598834
>>33598964
>Implying we haven't converted all the Inquisitors in this sector into Radicals...

>>33599195
>Many daemonettes keep to the old timey two breasts no dick style.
I feel we must return to the old ways of Tits and Tentacles!

>>33601438
HERESY!!!

>>33601616
EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!!!

>>33601738
"You gots any COCAINE?!?!"

>>33604073
ALREADY DONE!!!

>>33604644
>This thread ams dildoes
>THE CHAOS DREADS ARMS ARE DILDOES!!!

>>33593666
Give her the bolt, OP.

>>33605979
If you know what he mean

>>33606002
Blow her xeno brains out?

>>33606013
And make sure you leave after that

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Cevyk has gotten more rahzvod...It seems you cheveks have stopped talking about the the problems of the Original Poster! Shame on you, for refusing to help a man with his problems with the women of the Tau Empire!

If we are talking about the best girls, besides the Tau I would like to point out why the sons of Vostroya are the luckiest in the Imperium! The picture is related! This woman could join the Firstborn any day she pleased, eeeh?

>>33606350
Why haven't you been purged yet, heretic?

>>33606350
But comrade cevyk, What about eldar women?

>>33606350
Which caste is your favourite, honoured comrade? I cannot decide myself. They are all interesting in their own way. Perhaps Earth, for wide hips and bosoms? But then Air have their legs and Fire the muscles and...
Truly it is a hard choice.

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>>33606389
They are already dead.

>>33606350
Mr. Cevyk, I know it's probably a thing to not be worried about, but wouldn't she be freezing to death? I mean I'm some guy who hides on asteroids, but she's not dressed for the cold.

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>>33606384
Because, in the words of a most famous Angel of Death, "I am no heretic!"

>>33606389
I have talked about them before, but I shall summarize for you, yes? They are very pretty, but it is unlikely you will be rewarded for the chasing of them by anything except eating their dust. They do not let you get close if they do not want it! And so many of them do not want it, even their beauty and perfection cannot make the near hopeless task of wooing one worth it! And aside from that, many do not like humans, and do not respect the proud customs of Vostroya, seeing us as little children!

I will not deny, if you find an Eldar willing to be with you, you are a lucky son of a zadnik and I will be jealous of you for all of my days!

>>33606533
>talks about xenos love
>not a heretic

laughinginquisitor.jpg

>>33606536
Its ok
Comrade Cevyk have too much drink again
He always does that so give him a break

You all have Autism.

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>>33606507
I have seen only a few of the Tau myself, and I still yet find difficulty in telling some of the castes apart. There was one time, long ago, where I had a...tactical alliance with a Fire Caste warrior. She was exactly as the title suggests, eeeh? She was beautiful, well muscled, of my height (which is of no mean feat for a Tau)! But she was a warrior first and foremost, and we parted with the heaviest of hearts.

The Earth Caste...well, I have no need to speak much of them, yes? You point out their best features yourself, and they are friendly if a little serious-minded. Sometimes they remind me of a factory worker of Vostroya, yes?

The Water Caste are the talkers and alliance-makers, yes? I have only seen one, and she was pretty enough. Very courteous, and I am pleased to say she understood our customs very well! I never talked to her long, but I would have liked to have a conversation in private, eeeh?

>>33606529
My friend, she is a daughter of Vostroya! In weather such as that, it is pleasantly like home, but warm enough for a holiday! And the air looks to be so clean, she does not even need her rebreather! It is joyous that we may see her pretty face, eeeh?

>>33606607
Is it fatal?

>>33606607
I've called a doctor. He said I need memes to live.

>>33606623
And the Air Caste, comrade?

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>>33595047

I enjoy being alive, so I'm afraid I'm gonna have to refuse.

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>>33606585
Breaks will be given, no doubt.

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>>33606533
That counts as zoophilia among Eldar, actually.

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>>33606745
I regret to say I have seen not one! They fly the aircraft, yes? I fight on the ground, with the rest of the Vostroyan Firstborn! I am of the guard, not of the navy!

I have heard only through hearsay that they are very tall, and you must treat them very gently. Do not go drinking and stumble about like a zadnik! You stumble, you fall, you knock her over! You are a bad man and not worthy of a good mustache.

>>33606631
No, it just ensures that you'll forever be an unfunny faggot.

>>33593666
Tell her you were invited to a party at Commorragh and she should totally come with you.

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>>33606876
Oh you innocent little soul.

>>33606853
I have always fought bravely in the name of the Emperor! I may have a few bottles of fine rahzvod that I have drunk, but do not question my loyalty to Him on Terra!

>>33606921
...You are a very bad man indeed! Shame be upon you! Do you not know how worse the Dark Eldar are than the normal ones? Many cannot tell difference, but I know! Dark Eldar are evil and cruel!

>>33606902
Fair enough.

>>33606990
And also they know how to party.

>>33607014
I have never seen one drink rahzvod. They do not know how to party good.

>>33606350
>blizzard
>no undergarments
What on earth is going through her tiny gue'la cranium?

>>33607052
Well you've never been to Commoragh then I guess. Just come by. And bring rahzvod too.
You are cordially invited, comrade.

>>33606990
Your loyalty does not need to be questioned because you obviously have none. Filthy heretics like you are almost a waste of prometheum.

You'll still burn, of course.

>>33593827
was he strong? did you had his strenght?

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Interesting. I was recently attached to an Inquisitor’s retinue. We’re investigating a chaos cult hiding on a feudal world, when we stumble upon this Eldar group. In this group there’s a Farseer,an Exarch, a Warlock, two rangers, a couple dozen Dire Avengers, and a Harlequin. Long story short, we work together to take down the cult before they can summon a Keeper of Secrets to tear the planet a brand new asshole. All the while I kept catching the Harlequin staring at me. At first I thought it was some kinda creepy Eldar thing, but apparently the Warlock took notice as well, as he looked at the Harlequin, then at me, that back at the Harlequin, shook his head and muttered something about a “damned fetish”. Through out the rest of our (brief) cooperation, the Harlequin kept staring at me, wringing her hands and making creepy breathing noises behind her mask. I still don't know how I should feel about that.

>>33607084
Respectfully, I must decline. The Dark Eldar are not the ones I would wish to mess with, you see?

>>33607111
I am still alive. My Commissar has not shot me, our priest has not denounced me. What say you to that, Sister?

>>33607171
You probably should try to date her. Remember, Harlequins absolutely LOVE great jokes.

I wonder what Vespid females are like. Got a Vespbro, and he's an all right dude but I hear that their females live deep underground and mine crystals. Something about air pressure.

>>33607198
That your entire unit shall be purged, your names stricken and all you have come in contact with placed under intense scrutiny.

>>33607229
Craftworld losers have absolutely no sense of humor.

>>33607229
Ouch
Talk about low blow

>>33607233
This you cannot do! Noble sons of Vostroya are not simply playthings to be discarded at the leisure of a single battle-sister! Our regiment has fought on hundreds of worlds for thousands of years! My faith is pure, as is that of my comrades! My loyalty to the Emperor has never faltered - and if you but knew how many the Tau had coerced to their side, you would see that sharing a bed with one but remaining loyal to the Imperium is no mean feat!

>>33607231
Maybe >>33605906?

>>33607337
With every word you utter, the depth of your heresy increases.

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>love
>dating
>Slaneesh faggotry
FUCK YOU FUCK YOU PIECES OF SHIT YOU ARE SCUM AND HERETICAL EVEN BY KHORNATE STANDARDS YOU ARE SHIT

YOUR BLOOD WILL RUN ACROSS THE BATTLEFIELD AS I SMASH YOUR FUCKING SKULL AGAINST THE FLOOR FOR DAAAAYS YOU ARE SCUM YOU ARE SHIT I FUCKING HATE YOU SLANEESH FUCKING FAGGOTS AND IMPERIAL SLAVES

I WILL TEAR THIS WORLD ASUNDER WITH YOUR MANGLED CORPSE!!

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD SKULLS FOR THE FUCKING SKULL THRONE
DEATH TO THE FALSE EMPEROR AND ALL OF HIS SLAAAAAAAAAAAVESSSS!!!

>>33607389
Oh come on, if you want Slaanesh to do some of his/her magic on your dick you have to but ask. No need to act like this.

>>33607356
Khek.

At least I have not turned to Chaos like /one/ of your sisters...

>>33607401
I think you found the perfect words to make him even angrier.

>>33607410
You are either a slanneshi cultist or a xenophile. Either way you and your unit will feel the emperor's wrath.

>>33607337
Commorragh will gladly extend the invitation towards the whole population of Vostroya in case of Inquisitorial intervention.

We can even make sure the sun over your pens... I mean, quarters, is familiar to your people.

>>33607415
Oh the angrier the better. It just feels so much better for both then.

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>>33607451
His Wrath? Comrade please, every true Imperial knows even His Divine Majesty sampled some of the more exotics fruits of the galaxy.

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>>33607389
You say that but...

>>33607512
Comrade Laz! It is good to see you once again! I respect the zeal of the sisters, but usually I prefer it when they fight alongside me...

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>>33607512

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>>33607401
Shut the fuck up. SHUT THE FUCK YOURE A DEGENERATE FAGGOT WHAT THE FUCK

you suck cock. YOU SUCK. COCK. GET OUT OF MY FUCKING FACE YOU ARW SO FUCKING PETTY YOUR SKULL ISNT EVEN WORTH FUCKING TAKING YOUR MOTHER IS A WHORE YOUR FATHER IS A WHORE I SHIT FURY OVER ALL OF YOUR FUCKING ANCESTORS GOD DAMMIT IM SO FUCKING MAD AHHHHHHDKVSSKSHSUSVSSSSHA


KILL MAIM BURN KILL MAIM BURN KILL MAIN BURN AJBSKABSJDVSKALDBVKB *breaks the fucking keyboard*

>>33607620
Oh yes I do suck cock. Do you want me to show you?

File: 1390971437972.jpg (127KB, 752x934px) Image search: [Google]

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>>33607620
Oh you and your dirty talk...

>>33607512
If only he hit dat into perma alliance

File: 1405274793195.jpg (20KB, 284x339px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 284x339px

...Maybe we'd better talk a little about the beautiful women of the Imperium. The picture is related!

>>33607666
Pls stahp tempting me, Satan-sama~

>>33607751
Beautiful Felinids of the Imperium?

>>33607751
I'd like to see her with a bolter, and inspect the recoil.
Lasguns just don't have the oomph required.