>World Cup penalty shootout between your arch enemies and

When your girlfriend finds your dildo and you have to come up with an explanation in 4 seconds or less.

>>78204366
A) I got it for you.
B) It's my ex's.
C) I wanna get pegged by you, mistress.
D) You're a feminine penis away from being my dream woman so I had to compensate[doesn't work with Brazilian girls (male)]

Pick your poison.

>>78204366
>belated happy birthday

>>78204495
B also still works if it looks dirty

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Just look at this 3rd world fat kid.

>>78204495
>>78204499
Neither, I told it was my mom's. Of course she's not my girlfriend anymore but the fun I had with it was nice.

>>78204352
As an English, please delete this

>>78204352
That pic is just a normal penalty not a shootout

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>>78204728
> When I cross my slaggy fat 3rd world fingers "Meme Messi" will win the World Cup LMAO AYYYYYY

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HHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHA

Ya're 3 years late Franz

>>78204352
penalties are always hype, i dont understand the hate

>>78204742
and you own a dildo why....

>>78204907
I don't own a dildo, since that happened I "used to". When I had my first gf I was pretty insecure about my penis size (later I learned it's about the average size but when you are 16 and you have only watched porn, you think you are a midget) and everything we did was in the dark, so I thought of fucking her with a dildo while masturbating, and so I did it. When I broke up with her I retired the thing but left it to dust on my the top of my wardrobe, and then many years later another ex wanted to get a fan, I told her it was on the wardrobe and she found it.

>>78205233
wait, wait.

so your girl never found out that she was being fucked by a dildo in the dark?

LOOOL

>>78205260
She did, because she was a virgin but the first time I did it, it was the real thing, but every single time after that, it was the dildo. So when she asked me why it felt different, I told it was because she wasn't a virgin anymore.

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>>78205233
What?

>>78205278
Lmao I thought you had a dildo because you enjoyed it in the ass but this is even funnier

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>>78205233

this can't be real holy shit
reminds me of this screencap i took a few years ago and turned into oc

>>78205233
>>78205278
yo.....

>>78205233
>>78205278
ayo hol up

>>78204352
not for England, they already know they're going to lose if it comes to pens

Its like giving a monkey a loaded dildo

>>78205233
>>78205278
>the municipality of hue

>>78205233
>>78205278
ta de brincadeira ne filho da puta

>>78204728
>>78204775
>>78204837
They are whiter than you, Yussuf

>>78209663
just

>>78205233
Otimo Post meu amigo

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>>78204907
>and you own a dildo why....
Yeah, what possible reason would there be to own a dildo... Truly the conundrum of our times

What a thread 2bh, based hue

>>78209968
how many dildos do you think tsu has on his basement?

>>78205278
>>78205233

hmmmmmm. not sure what to think here

>>78209663
This semen slurping sport isn't for me

>>78205233
>>78205278
good post

Brazil was a mistake desu

>>78205233
>>78205278

Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with Brazil?

Like, the women are hyper-sexual goddesses.

Then the men are just pathetic. Like, I've never encountered or heard of a Brazilian dude who was alpha and macho (except maybe the guy on Chef's Table). The disparity is weird.

>>78210466
It's a nation of cucks.

That's why they love fucking trannies.

>>78204366
wow I have a gf

>>78210622
well done son

>>78205233
Fuck you needle dick

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>>78205278
>>78205233
It would have been less fucked up if you had just told us you took it up the arse.

>>78210520
trannies are still women tho

>>78211317
t.favela rat.

>>78205278
what. the fuck.

>>78211352
t.chinless wonder.

>>78205233
O que a fodendo foda, anão

>>78205233
>>78205278
glad I'm a virgin and don't have to deal with this shit

>>78205233
>>78205278
replying to ebin BR babaquice/zoeira

>>78205233
Tá de brincadeira, brother.

>>78211809
we are a very serious nation

>>78212346
and so are we, tugas never speak zoeira

>>78205278
>>78205233

>uma dildicia

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>>78212371
Was this a joke?

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>>78205233
fellow hue here, 90% of the men here do this, but it's too afraid to admit

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TSUUUUUUUUUUMA DELICIA

>>78212452
he forgot the batteries on the first try

>>78212475
yeah this, was pretty funny when i was talking with my father why he had a dildo in his drawer

>>78210466

You spend too much time on 4chan. Brazilian men are alpha as fuck. Try going to the beach in Rio, or in the Southern states like Santa Catarina. They're full of 6'4" dudes that will make your skinnyfat pale ass look like a different species.

Source: I had a Brazilian girlfriend when I was 16-17. Went and visited her in Brazil and realized I better start lifting

>>78212540

Bitches in Rio are hot as fuck

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>>78205278
>I told it was because she wasn't a virgin anymore.

>>78212540
>You spend too much time on 4chan. Brazilian men are alpha as fuck. Try going to the beach in Rio, or in the Southern states like Santa Catarina

The South only have gay people and whores, you know that right?

>>78205278
Anon, I.... I don't even know... what the fuck...

>>78212540
the wealthy parts of rio are obsessed with fitness, practically a gym at every block.

>>78212475
>>78212513
nah for real?

i dont believe you guys.

>>78212571
Yeah, I've dated Brazilian, Colombian and Ecuadorian girls. Brazilian was the "hottest" but tied for biggest whore along with the Colombian. Girls in Rio and Florianopolis were the hottest I've ever seen.

>>78212609
The coolest BRs I knew were from the South

>>78212634
I believe it, the city seems to be completely obsessed with looking hot as fuck because you're outside/on the beach/in the sun 24/7

>>78212668
well i have no idea if every one does this, but my father recently passed away and he gave away his dildo to me

>>78212725
that's nice
my dad made me bury him with his dildo inside his pants so his bulge would look bigger at the funeral
he was such a cheeky cunt lmao,love him

>>78212771
nice.

did you guys retrieve the dildo after tho?a family dildo is pretty expensive, at least here in Brazil

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Thread has taken an even darker turn

>>78212804
of course i wouldn't let a perfect dildo rot away on my dad's dead balls

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>>78205233
>>78205278

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/r/ ing the pepe where its that guy eating the monkey soup

>>78204742
>>78205233
sopa de dildão
uma delicia

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>>78205233
>>78205278
thank you based macaco

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>>78213317
here you go senpai

hueposters are the only reason I keep coming to this shit hole.

>>78212402
my fucking sides anon kek

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>>78205278

>>78209994
Zero. He reminds us repeatedly of how much he likes women.

>>78204352
Can't wait for France to beat our arch-nemesis Belgium in WC semifinal

>>78204352
never experienced something like that desu because my country always wins versus "arch enemies"

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>>78204775
>tfw no argie gf

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>>78205278
>>78205233
kek good bless you /sp/

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>>78205233
>>78205278
thank you Brazil

holy fucking shit my sides
why is it always brazilians?

>>78218531
200 million heads constantly exposed to too much sun, humudity and lost home world cups.
Alexander's India Campaign: the People

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>>78205233
>>78205278

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>>78205233
>>78205278

Very good thread.

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>>78205233
>>78205278
delet brazil

>>78218308
are we rivals?

>>78205278
>>78205233
has this been on r/4chan yet?

>>78218929
Dee Dee, we're going to the moon.


TONIGHT.

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>>78205233
>>78205278

>>78205233
>>78205278
anons here are laughing at you but they don't know the struggle. I didn't buy a dildo but I did buy a cock sleeve (penis extension) my dick went from 13cm to 19cm in length. Everytime before sex I would go to the bathroom and put the sleeve on. Thankfully she didn't notice it, or if she did she was quiet about it. The real problems were when we were in a car or just out and about and she wanted to fool around. So I bought another smaller one that I could put in the glove compartment. That one she found and I told her it was a b-day present from friends. That's where I fucked up since she knew that I didn't have any friends who would give me such a gift. We broke up some months later (last year) and now I have two cock sleeves that I don't know what to do with.

>>78205233
this was a korean comic, I remember it

>>78204352
joke on you, >we don't have an arch enemy

>>78205233
>>78205278
my favorite poster so far today. keep it sempaõ you'll end up in my diary

>>78204352
>Feelsbadman.png
>tfw you are from shit footy country and you don't even have an arch enemy in football.

On the other hand it's always nice to win against Italian twats.

>Anything more nerver-wrecking than this and an actual Totaler Krieg?


playing a WC semi with Dante and David Luiz as defenders

>>78204352

to be honest i am glad we lost to argentina, losing to germany in the final would have literally be the worst thing ever apart from losing by penalties like you mentioned

t. dutch guy

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