http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art icle-4710666/OJ-Simpson-

>/sp/ - Sports

You can't jerk off in jail? WTF

>>77209249
This hearing might get a sticky tomorrow.

>>77209252
>If OJ is punished for his masturbation charge it wouldn't be the first time a famous prison inmate has been punished for pleasuring himself.
>Whitey Bulger, the Boston gangster who had been a fugitive for nearly 18 years before he was caught living in Santa Monica, CA in 2011, was caught masturbating while incarcerated.
>According to published reports in 2015 a male corrections officer making 3 a.m. rounds at the US Penitentiary Coleman II in Sumterville, Fla., reported that Bulger, while alone, with the lights on, was violating a regulation that prohibits any sexual activity by inmates.
>Prison authorities soon put him in solitary confinement for 30 days, revoked his commissary and e-mail privileges for 120 days, and confiscated his personal property for 30 days.

Masturbating is a SERIOUS crime. You can land a minimum of 30 days in solitary confinement if you masturbate in your cell.

fucking hell America is a fucked up place, it is literally illegal to bust a nut

https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2017/07/17/o-j-simpsons-thursday-parole-bid-almost-derailed-illicit-cookie/485135001/

>Not long after Simpson arrived at the prison, Felix said, an inmate who helped with food preparation stole cookies, brought them back to the unit where Simpson was housed and handed them to the other inmates, most of whom returned to their cells before eating the cookies.
>“Being the loud O.J. he is, the guard in the bubble saw him eating a cookie,’’ Felix told USA TODAY Sports. “And of course she said, ‘Where’d you get the cookie from?’ Well, O.J. doesn’t lie. He got it from a guy, a culinary worker.
>“Well, she wrote him up for having contraband. Over a cookie. That’s pretty crazy. So when I came back the next day for work, O.J. came to me and told me what happened. He said, ‘I can’t have a write up because I won’t get my parole.’ ”

no cookie
no nookie

whats' a brotha gonna do?

>>77209296

May I ask...why the fuck is masturbation prohibited? Seriously, why? How would that ever benefit the prison or those who work in it?

I'm pretty sure these guys don't go 20+ years without jacking off, but still, that just seems unnecessarily ridiculous to even expect that of them.

>>77209385
My guess would be health concerns. Prisons, or any place where that many people are regularly in a confined area, are susceptible to quick and wide scaled spreads of infections, flu, etc. Think about STDs. Do you want to be the one who has to clean Jamal's aids cell all the time because he jacks off everyday all over the walls?

May I ask where they are supposed to jack off?

Is there like a small hall or something where they all gather during dedicated masturbation hours?

>>77209599

That's what I was thinking, but apparently it's forbidden in female prisons too?

It's probably more along the lines of them not wanting it to encourage sexual contact between inmates or whatever shit.

>be american
>have a permit from the government to be able to conceal a gun in my anus
>get jailed for having a wet dream

Fucking hell

>>77209785
You're only supposed to be pleasured by Tyrone in the showers.

Is he a sex offender now?

He did everything wrong, can't believe people will defend this nigger.

In county jail you jack off in the showers during certain hours. You put something like a spray bottle out so people know not to go in.

>>77209933
>everything wrong
>Bitch wife tries to cuck him
>kill them and get away with it
>30 years later get sentenced to life because your penis and hand made sustained contact

wew

>>77209936
LEX!

>>77209785
in that louis theroux documentary about that prison in miami they had 10 dudes to a cell and there was just a walled off (with sheets and shit) part of the cell where dudes would go to do it
>>77209875
you would know

did he use a glove when he wacked off?

OJ should have never been in jail for as long as he was committed for.

>>77209228
>Daily Fail
Christ, I knew they were shit tier but I didn't think they were so bad that even TMZ/Gawker shit is more credible.

http://thegrapevine.theroot.com/oj-simpson-s-parole-is-not-in-jeopardy-because-he-let-l-1797065591

>>77210288
>posting Gawker for black people

that's an even WORSE source

>>77209228
You aren't allowed to masturbate in prison? Wtf

>>77210288
>something as seemingly innocuous as relieving his sexual urges into a sock (or a tissue or a towel or whatever)

she made the juice joke, but didn't include the glove in this sentence. disappointed.

>>77210304
You can disagree with their opinion pieces, but their news is reliable and they source well.

>>77209335
>fucking hell America is a fucked up place, it is literally illegal to bust a nut
It was illegal for a girl to eat another girl pussy for 200 years. They changed the law 5 years ago.

I can't believe people were trying to compare Aaron Hernandez to this legend. That spic doesn't have 1% of the entertainment factor of this psycho.

>>77209296
Do they strap your hands down in solitary confinement?

If they didn't, next time they enter they'd be walking ankle deep in my criminal ejaculate.

>>77210341
What did you do?

>>77211227
>he needs his hands to cum

amateur

if you find no ejaculate, you must aquit.

>>77211304
I still have all my ribs Prince.

>>77209599
I would take Jamal's semen home to my wife so we could give birth to a beautiful race-mixed child.

>masturbation is not permitted in US prisons

What the fuck

>OJ not following no fap

he deserves it

>>77209296
Land of the free lmao

When's the last time Lexplorer masturbated?

man imagine the nut you can bust after ten years in prison

>>77215932
>in prison
>expect freedom

>>77216024
https://youtu.be/CYUa1aR2qWY

>THE JUICE IS LOOSE

YOU HAD ONE JOB OP
ONE JOB

File: you.jpg (191KB, 1600x1000px) Image search: [Google]

191KB, 1600x1000px

>>77211324
YOU

>>77216045
>prison
>Land of the free
Need to put this one on the boat back to Shitain it seems

>>77209249
>wanting less threads on this dying shithole

>against the rules to beat your dick

I thought he was imprisoned in America, not North Korea

>>77211089
That must have only been in some rural shithole stuck in 1850