>all time top scorer for Man Utd and the England national

>>76933131
you don't knight a king, lad

File: yZ5Xj.gif (135KB, 500x492px)

135KB, 500x492px

>>76933149
so tru

Hair implants and he's a chav

>>76933131
hasn't won a WC

Rooney is so shit.

>>76933131
The fire crackles as the children gasp in awe. Snow begins to fall outside the window the your tale comes to an end, but the youngsters are still thirsty for more. 'Tell us about the two he scored against Andorra again Grandpapa' one child begs. 'No, no! The legendary brace vs Kazakhstan!' implores another. The oldest boy pipes up. 'Be quiet you two, Grandad tells those ones all the time. Go on, tell us the one you promised us last time - the penalty vs Slovenia...Grandad..G-Grandad?'
The rocking chair creaks to a halt. A serene expression is on your face and all of Rooney's goals flash before your eyes in your final moments as the children embrace you. His one World Cup goal, The legendary double in Minsk. That tap in against Liechenstien. they know whats happening and are scared, but calm.
The last thing you hear as you slide into the black warmth of death is the youngest boy - old beyond his years, a football fanatic who spends every free moment outside kicking his battered leather ball against the wall 'Dont be sad, he lived a hell of a life...in the age of Rooney.'

>>76933233
>play him out of position
>as a midfielder no less
>"wow, why is he so shit?"
He would be banging in at least 15-20 a season if he was used properly again

>>76933178
He also had sex with granny prostitutes

>>76933269
I've watched every game he's participated in the last few years and he is godawful. What's even worse is the goals and assists he does get are almost always accidental/not what he was trying to do.

>>76933465
>the goals and assists he does get are almost always accidental/not what he was trying to do

How do you know what he was intending to do or not?

Isn't he Irish.

>>76933131
I got downvoted on reddit when I suggested he doesn't deserve a knighthood because only scores against meme teams desu

why are my fellow britons so deluded

>>76938202
you're not part of the great empire now pajeet
you chose to poo free, remember?

>>76938218
i sexually identify as british, my brown friend. did you just assume my nationality because of my flag?

Unlike Charlton or Hurst, he never won the World Cup. Just like the rest of the English NT for the past few years, he did poorly against national teams that were actually good.

>>76938239
Portugal is greatest ally.

>>76938202
>I got downvoted on reddit
Maybe you should go back

>>76938301
>go back in current year
stop being a bigot, I'm an undocumented 4channer

Sir Gazza first innit

>>76933465
>americans

sometimes i wonder whether you're just leaf tier shitposting