>Hark, m'lady. >Do you hear a fluttering? >Why

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>Hark, m'lady.
>Do you hear a fluttering?
>Why petal, it's the sound of your buttocks taking wing and flying right into my heart.
>I am in tender love with your flabby rump.
>The cheeks, my oh my, the cheeks!
>Sweetest arsehangers!
>*Chuckle chuckle*
>Bring the heavenly hiney closer! To my face!
>Such heat radiates from your bulbous stinkwhoppers.
>The dimpled fleshcushions! I simply cannot wait.
>My lust for your bottomly gift is world-renowned.
>Yes, bend over and position your superb shitpistol over my mouth!
>I await!
>PFOOOOT SQQQQUIIIIIIILLLLLLLCCCCH
>*Nom* *Gulp* *Slurp*
>How divine, such dark, solid turds, with a hint of moist rectal slime. How readily they divide against my teeth, to reveal a careful stitching of shitfibres. Is that a Sweetcorn kernel I lay my eyes upon? A possible roundworm egg? Further study will be required.
>The taste, an arresting earthy flavour, with a slight vulnerability of Bovril and Swedish Turnips.
>My dear, you really are on form tonight!
>Yes, another!
>BBBBBBRRRRRRT
>Yes, again so deliciously slimy. As I mash these putrid poo plops all over my lips, I cannot help but wonder if I am Icarus like, in my lustful quests to become ever closer to the ultimate pungence! You m'whore are the fart beneath my wings!
>BRRRROP
>One more, finish it dear.
>SQUEEEEEERRRRRRT
> A slight smidgen of boiling hot diarrhoea! A perfect ending, m'prostitute! Delightful!